Kids & Family
**Loving On Purpose**

Are you loving your adult child on purpose? Are you choosing love over judgement of them? If you want to know what is getting in the way of improving your relationship with your adult children, in this podcast I will teach what the real problem is keeping you from accomplishing this goal. I am the mother of five children and a member of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints. I know the struggle that comes with navigating a relationship with an adult child. I have learned how to choose to love my children exactly the way they are.

Latest Episodes:

100 Ways to Show Your Adult Children You Love Them Nov 29, 2023

Show notes

No excuses now. I offer you 100 ways you can show your adult children you love them even if they don't share their love back with you. Love is always a choice. Love just loves. Love will always feel best.

I am no longer offering my 8-week coaching program, but I remain fully committed to supporting parents of adult children. If you have questions or need guidance, you’re welcome to reach out to me directly at bonnie@bonnielyman.com.

I would be honored to help you find greater confidence and happiness in your life

Gratitude Revisited Nov 22, 2023

Show notes

This is a replay of a podcast I published a year ago but I felt it worth rebroadcasting it.
The most healthiest emotion we can have is gratitude. When we are thankful for all the good things in life we enjoy we have a better connection with God, with our family, and with ourselves. We live in abundance rather than scarcity. We realize we already have so much of what we want in life. Being grateful enables us to live a very satisfying life.
See full show notes and transcript HERE.

I would be honored to help you find greater confidence and happiness in your life

How to Interrupt a Negative Thought Cycle Nov 15, 2023

Show notes

Are there times you feel consumed by the thoughts ruminating in your head over how you're being treated by your adult children? And then these thoughts start impacting other relationships that are important to you. You feel miserable because you can't stop the thoughts and you feel like you could explode with resentment and disappointment. Listen to this episode to learn how to stop these negative thought cycles.

I would be honored to help you find greater confidence and happiness in your life

When You are Being Emotionally Abused by Your Adult Children Nov 08, 2023

Show notes

Do you really want to show up at Thanksgiving or Christmas dinner when you know you're going to be emotionally abused? The better question to ask is do you know you have a choice? What is the reason you'd be going? Do you like your reason? I hope this episode will shed some light on the choices you have about being around anyone that is emotionally abusive to you. Love always wins but that doesn't mean you wear a sign that says"kick me" or "punch me." You are a child of God and you are important.

I would be honored to help you find greater confidence and happiness in your life

Start taking Action To Show Your Love Nov 01, 2023

Show notes

We usually use the Model to get a result we want in our lives by focusing on the feeling we want to feel and change our thoughts to cause that feeling. In this episode I'm giving attention to the action line of the model and how changing our behavior by show gestures of love can give us the result of feeling more love that results in living a peaceful, well lived life. Love always wins....just every time.

I would be honored to help you find greater confidence and happiness in your life

Ways to Love Others When Our Love Feels Rejected Oct 25, 2023

Show notes

Our love may feel rejected by our adult children but that doesn't mean they don't love us. It's our expectation of a certain way they should be responding to our love that they are not living up to that causes us to feel they are rejecting our love. Whether it's not thanking us for a gift we gave them to not including us in their children's lives that may cause us to feel resentment and anger rather than love. But isn't that us, loving them conditionally? Listen to this episode to learn some ways to keep loving our children when we feel they are rejecting our love.

I would be honored to help you find greater confidence and happiness in your life

Complaints Adult Children Have About Their Parents Oct 18, 2023

Show notes

I share some insights into what adult children commonly complain about their parents since they have become adults. You'll find from listening to this episode, it's many of the same complaints parents have about their adult children. I discuss 10 common complaints adult children have shared. I am not inferring that a struggling relationship is caused by the parents, but maybe you will learn some things that you could do to strengthen any relationship. Anything we can do to be part of the solution instead of the problem always helps us to feel love more often. Practicing choosing love over judgement is the most influential choice we can make to unconditionally loving our children. Unconditionally loving our children is the key to finding peace in our relationship with them.
References:
My Adult Child Won't Talk To Me
https://www.theatlantic.com/family/archive/2019/06/my-adult-child-wont-talk-me/591274/#

Five Complaints Parents and Children Have About Each Other
https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/between-the-lines/202104/five-complaints-parents-and-grown-kids-have-about-each-other

6 Sources of Tension Between Adult Children and Their Parents

https://www.psychologytoday.com/us/blog/tech-support/202207/6-sources-tension-between-adult-children-and-their-parents

The Biggest Complaints Kids Have About Their Parents is....
http://www.tfcknoxville.com/psychology-blog/the-biggest-complaint-from-kids-about-their-parents-is

I would be honored to help you find greater confidence and happiness in your life

Causes and Remedies to Painful Relationships With Adult Children Oct 11, 2023

Show notes

The cause of your painful relationship with an adult child may not be what you think it is? When we find out what it is, it's mind blowing. Because it's not their actions, but it's your thoughts about their actions that is causing you all your pain. The good news is that we can't change their actions but we can change our thoughts. It's learning that you are responsible for your feelings because you are the one thinking those thoughts. Also, part of being an adult is knowing that you are responsible for fulfilling your own needs...not your children. Tune in to find out some remedies for changing your thoughts that enables you to be the creator of the kind of life you want to live.

I would be honored to help you find greater confidence and happiness in your life

Were You a Negligent Parent? Oct 04, 2023

Show notes

Many of my clients wonder if their children are disrespectful to them because they failed in their child raising techniques. Unless a child was severely abused, how they were raised has nothing to do with how they treat their parents. Most of the time disrespectful children don't see themselves as being disrespectful. Whatever is happening, they see it from a different perspective. It's their feelings that cause them to act a certain way; they feel a certain way because of the thoughts they are thinking. If life is really hard for adult children, they are likely to have thoughts that cause them to have feelings that cause them to not show up as a respectful person. It has nothing to do with you because you have no power to make a person feel a certain way. Tune in to understand better why most of the time it's not a parent's fault if their child is disrespectful.

I would be honored to help you find greater confidence and happiness in your life

What You Have Control Over In A Relationship Sep 27, 2023

Show notes

We can't control or change how we want people to act in a relationship. Even with an out pouring of love, they still might not accept our love. But we can control our behavior and the kind of person we want to show up as in any relationship. Relationships with family members are always the most personal to us. Listen to this episode to learn what you can control in your contribution to a loving, kind relationship.

I would be honored to help you find greater confidence and happiness in your life

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