Show notes
You start a new weight loss plan feeling motivated. You follow it perfectly for a few days—or maybe a few weeks.
Then you eat the cookie.
You miss the workout.
You have one day that doesn't go according to plan.
And suddenly you think, "Well, I've already ruined it. I'll start again Monday."
Why does one small slip so often turn into completely giving up?
In this episode, we're talking about the abstinence violation effect and how all-or-nothing thinking can turn a small lapse into a full-blown relapse. Researcher G. Alan Marlatt studied this pattern and found that it's often our reaction to the slip, rather than the slip itself, that makes us more likely to give up completely.
And underneath those rigid rules is often something even sneakier:
Perfectionism.
We'll talk about the three types of perfectionism:
- Self-oriented perfectionism: the impossibly high standards you place on yourself
- Other-oriented perfectionism: the standards you place on everyone around you
- Socially prescribed perfectionism: the belief that other people expect you to have it all together
I'll also walk you through questions that can help you identify which type might be showing up in your life.
Most importantly, we'll reframe the way you think about your habits.
A rule says: "I do this every day, with no exceptions, or I've failed."
A routine says: "This is what I come back to."
That one shift can change everything.
Because the goal isn't to create a weight loss plan where you never slip up. Nobody does that.
The goal is to change what a slip means to you.
One missed day is not failure. One cookie is not the end. One imperfect choice does not erase everything you've done.
It's simply something you come back from.
If perfectionism and all-or-nothing thinking have been running your weight loss journey, this episode will help you see the pattern differently.
And stick around until the end for a simple way to start building habits one small step at a time.
Listen now and learn how to stop starting over.
If you're ready to make changes before Christmas, book a call with Dara to learn more about her program and how she helps women. Book your call HERE.
Take the perfectionist quiz for yourself HERE.
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