Junkfood Cinema

Latest Episodes:

JCVDecember: Timecop Dec 20, 2017

Show notes

In the distant past of 2004, and the even slightly distanter past of 1994, one man had the courage to travel back in time for justice...and to brandish a sick ass mullet!
Brian and Cargill upset the spacetime continuum as JCVDecember explores the ageless excellence of Timecop. Ron Silver devours scenery, balloon men do the splits, and Mia Sara might be a Highlander.
All this plus the guys discuss the petty ways they would personally profit from time travel and Van Damme keeps going back to change this podcast. What a jerk!
Like the show? Consider supporting us on Patreon! For as little as $4/mo, you can get access to all our bonus content, and you ensure we can keep doing Junkfood Cinema long after the end of the world! Thanks!

JCVDecember: Bloodsport Dec 14, 2017

Show notes

Put up your Dux, because JCVDecember fights on!
This week, Brian and Cargill step into the kumite and battle it out with Van Damme’s breakout film: Bloodsport.
The guys exchange jabs as they breakdown the pros and cons of what is arguably the second best version of this same movie that Van Damme made three times. They also discuss flashback troubles, propose an 80s soundtrack singer kumite, and Frank Dux pops in to take credit for everything.
If your bodies are ready and your hearts are on fire, push it over the wire by downloading and listening to this week’s episode!

JCVDecember: Sudden Death w/Special Guest Derek Mahr Dec 08, 2017

Show notes

Brian and Cargill are joined once again by Derek Mahr as they spin-kick off their JCVDecember celebration with the best puckin' Die Hard ripoff of all time: Sudden Death. Ok, it might not be the best Die Hard ripoff, but it's definitely the meanest and the most hockey-y.
Thrill as Van Damme beats the stuffing out of a penguin mascot! Recoil in fear as Powers Boothe fills your mouth with spiders! Scratch your heads in confusion as we contemplate JCVD's double identity as both a Mega Man villain AND a Chili's manager.
All this plus, the Cargill joke that made Brian contemplate retiring from podcasting. What are you waiting for, Van Dammit? Download and listen now!
Like the show? Consider supporting us on Patreon! For as little as $4/mo, you can get access to all our bonus content, and you ensure we can keep doing Junkfood Cinema long after the end of the world! Thanks!

Flash Gordon Dec 01, 2017

Show notes

In this week's Mongo-sized episode, Brian & Cargill, kings of the impossible, travel back to planet Mongo to talk about Flash Gordon...but like actually talk about Flash Gordon this time.
They rock out to Queen, worship Ming von Sydow, and get lost in the technicolor fever dream of this 80s fantasy classic. These impetuous boys also discuss Flash Gordon's incestuous relationship with Star Wars, whether it's cool to wear your own name on a teeshirt, and their theory that the whole movie might be a certain Jets quarterback's concussed delusion. For god's sake, strap yourselves down for this one.
You bored, Klytus? Download, listen, and share this episode.
Like the show? Consider supporting us on Patreon! For as little as $4/mo, you can get access to all our bonus content, and you ensure we can keep doing Junkfood Cinema long after the end of the world! Thanks!

Moden Junkfood Masters: Lorene Scafaria Nov 22, 2017

Show notes

It has been dormant for a long time, but like the mighty McRib, Modern Junkfood Masters has returned!
This time around, Brian and Cargill honor writer/director Lorene Scafaria. They discuss the oddly embraceable hipsterism of Nick & Norah's Infinite Playlist, the heartfelt apocalypse of Seeking a Friend for the End of the World, and the poignant, autobiographical rabbit hole of The Meddler.
All this, plus, the creation of The Meatloaf Connection (which will almost certainly be appearing at your local mall food court), a discussion of J.K. Simmons' mustache game, and the least appetizing reference to Oreos you've ever heard!
Like the show? Consider supporting us on Patreon! For as little as $4/mo, you can get access to all our bonus content, and you ensure we can keep doing Junkfood Cinema long after the end of the world! Thanks!

Leap of Faith with Special Guest Brian Brushwood Nov 16, 2017

Show notes

Welcome, brothers and sisters! Cargillvember trucks along as we pitch our tents for a Leap of Faith revival. As we discuss the pros and cons of this Steve Martin vehicle, we knew we needed someone who is himself a pro at being a con: Night Attack/Scam School's Brian Brushwood.
We discuss the tricks of the con man trade as they pertain to televangelists and pray-for-pay preachers, Leap of Faith's heavenly cast, and why Liam Neeson should have played Doc Brown. Also, during the recording, Brian's computer becomes possessed by a demon. Was it a hoax, or the genuine article? You decide.
Like the show? Consider supporting us on Patreon! For as little as $4/mo, you can get access to all our bonus content, and you ensure we can keep doing Junkfood Cinema long after the end of the world! Thanks!

Spice World Nov 08, 2017

Show notes

Junkfood Cinema is here to spice up your life as Brian & Cargill tell you why you want why you really really want to revisit Spice World.
No, we’re not kidding. The guys’ two minds become one as they explain the exceptional satire of this bugnuts vehicle for Britain’s premier girl group of the late 90s. They touch upon the self-effacing humor, the cavalcade of cameos, and why Spice World at least belongs in the same conversation as Purple Rain and A Hard Day’s Night.
They’re giving you everything, and all that they want from you is the promise you will download and share.

Romero's 'Dead' Franchise Nov 03, 2017

Show notes

We're coming to get you, Junkions! Actually, we're coming to give you a super-sized feast as Brian and Cargill feast on all six of George A. Romero's Dead films. From Night of to Survival of, their corpses will not rest until the entire franchise is covered.
The guys discuss the various chronologies, the messages of each installment, how The Walking Dead only exists because of Romero, and why Robin Sparkles probably got devoured by ghouls. They also chat about the horrors of copyright loopholes and postulate that those guys at Pace were a little overzealous about their salsa.
Feel free to gorge on this mega episode (just don't CHOKE ON IT!!!) and spread the infection as far as you can! We'll see you at the mall!
Like the show? Consider supporting us on Patreon! For as little as $4/mo, you can get access to all our bonus content, and you ensure we can keep doing Junkfood Cinema long after the end of the world! Thanks!

Tourist Trap Oct 25, 2017

Show notes

Get ready to take an ill-advised detour as Brian & Cargill fall into a Tourist Trap. Part Texas Chainsaw Massacre, part Carrie, and part Psycho, Tourist Trap is all lunacy.
The guys discuss Chuck Connors' reinvention, the formative power of loincloths, and why Klaus Kinski won't stop screaming at them. All this plus Brian goes off book in a Hulu tirade.
Make sure your friends don't get lost, share this episode and direct them to Junkfood Cinema!

Pumpkinhead Oct 19, 2017

Show notes

Ain't nothing this podcast can do for you, 'cept send you to hell...or maybe send you out for tacos. Brian and Cargill continue their unintended, but still great, redneck horror theme with 1988's Pumpkinhead.
The directorial debut of effects master Stan Winston, Pumpkinhead is a perfect horror flick. The contemporary fairy tale with one of the genre's most empathetic protagonists (who is also kind of the villain) also happens to feature one of the greatest monsters ever committed to film.
Gather your kin, sit a spell, and mind where you step. The woods are full of...Kenny Loggins?

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