How to Survive

Latest Episodes:

How to Survive: The Saw Marathon Oct 31, 2017

Show notes

The Saw franchise is one of the most successful series of horror movies in cinematic history, and with Jigsaw (2017) in cinemas now, Chris and Joe felt it was finally time to tackle John Kramer's sinister games - all in one sitting.

In this special bonus episode Chris and Joe talk through their experience of watching through all 7 Saw movies for the first How to Survive video podcast. Though they talk through all the traps, twists and tantrums in the 11-hour long ordeal, there's really no replacement for watching the full video at HowtoSurviveShow.com

All of which leads to one question...

Why haven't you watched it yet?

Watch the full video now: https://youtu.be/V_3H8KjMuUo

How to Survive: Creep (2014) Oct 25, 2017

Show notes

It's episode 115... and we're gonna be great friends...

Creep (2014) tells the story of Aaron, a freelance videographer who is hired by the mysterious Joseph to film a secret video at Joseph's wilderness retreat. Before long, Aaron begins to realise Joseph really is a 'creep' - but will he be able to escape the danger he's in before it's too late?

We talk about the merits of clear communication with the emergency services; the appropriate way to behave when in charge of an automobile; and we confront maybe the worst police we've come across in any movie yet.

All of which leads to one question...

How would you survive?

Whatever happens, one thing's for sure:

You're not real! You're made of moonlight!

Another classic film solved by the best movie podcast in the world

How to Survive: Gerald's Game (2017) Oct 18, 2017

Show notes

It's episode 114... and time for a romantic getaway...

Gerald's Game (2017) tells the story of Jessie, who travels to a rural retreat with her husband, Gerald. Once there, they engage in some light bondage, and Jessie is handcuffed to the bed, but after a quarrel, Gerald drops dead! Now chained to the bed, Jessie seems to be stuck with no hope of rescue. How will she survive?

We talk about the importance of not wasting valuable resources in a survival situation; the limitations of virtual assistants; and the general importance of making good on any escape plan.

All of which leads to one question...

How would you survive?

Whatever happens, one thing's for sure:

You're not real! You're made of moonlight!

Another classic film solved by the best movie podcast in the world

How to Survive: Poltergeist (1982) Oct 11, 2017

Show notes

It's episode 113... and clear your minds. It knows what scares you. It has from the very beginning. Don't give it any help, it knows too much already.step into the light!

Poltergeist (1982) tells the story of the Freeling family. The Freelings live a peaceful suburban existence, until one day, their daughter is sucked into the walls of the house, and trapped in a netherworld where the only way to contact her is through the TV. What's really going on? And will her family get her back?

We talk about the importance of not leaving vulnerable people alone during natural disasters; the benefits of securing a comfortable landing when falling from the ceiling; and we enjoy a tense debate about the ins and outs of tree preservation.

All of which leads to one question...

How would you survive?

Whatever happens, one thing's for sure:

STEP INTO THE LIGHT!

Another classic film solved by the best movie podcast in the world

How to Survive: IT (2017) Oct 04, 2017

Show notes

It's episode 112... and we all float down here...

IT (2017) tells the story of a group of teenage friends in the town of Derry. A number of children in the town disappear, and our heroes race to uncover the truth before it's too late. (All while fighting for their lives against an evil dancing clown...)

We talk about the importance of not leaving severely damning evidence when reporting crimes; the benefits of becoming a teenage runaway; and the risks of attacking your victims in broad daylight in open spaces.

All of which leads to one question...

How would you survive?

Whatever happens, one thing's for sure:

You'll float too!

Another classic film solved by the best movie podcast in the world

How to Survive: Friday the 13th (2009) Sep 27, 2017

Show notes

It's episode 111... and we're finally finished!

Friday the 13th (2009) is a reboot which tells the story of a group of teenagers who spend the night around Camp Crystal Lake and get picked off one by one. The perpetrator? Jason Voorhees (which actually makes this a reboot of Friday the 13th: Part 2...)

We talk about the importance of recognising your own tolerance for parties; the benefits of sensible gun handling; and we finally say goodbye to our arch nemesis (until the next inevitable remake...).

All of which leads to one question...

How would you survive?

Whatever happens, one thing's for sure:

People go missing around here, they're gone for good. Outsiders come, they don't know where to walk. They bring trouble. We just want to be left alone. And so does he.

Another classic film solved by the best movie podcast in the world

How to Survive: Paranormal Activity 2 (2010) Sep 20, 2017

Show notes

It's episode 110... and I don't know if the house is haunted, but I hope it is.

Paranormal Activity 2 (2010) tells the story of the Rey family. Shortly after the birth of their new son, the Reys begin experiencing strange goings-on in their home. All signs point to a haunting - and when the main characters from the first film show up you know there's going to be trouble...

We talk about the importance of sharing critical information about hauntings with similarly afflicted family members; as well as the hysterical idolatry of a mostly forgettable horror movie victim, and more!

All of which leads to one question...

How would you survive?

Another classic film solved by the best movie podcast in the world

How to Survive: From Dusk Till Dawn (1996) Sep 13, 2017

Show notes

It's episode 109... and we may be a podcast, but we're not a f*cking podcast.

From Dusk Till Dawn (1996) tells the story of two brothers, Seth and Richie, who get into a bad situation when they kidnap a family on a road trip and escape to Mexico They head to a bar for the night, but all is not what it seems with the bar's staff and patrons

We hash out optimal business hours for mythical creatures; the importance of keeping your promises; and more!

All of which leads to one question...

How would you survive?

Whatever happens, one thing's for sure...

If you try to run, I've got six little friends and they all run faster than you do

Another classic film solved by the best movie podcast in the world

How to Survive: Let the Right One In (2008) Sep 06, 2017

Show notes

It's episode 108... and may we come in?

Let the Right One In (2008) tells the story of Oskar, a young boy who is bullied at school, and makes friends with his new neighbour, Eli. They form a tight bond, but all is not as it seems with Eli, and why does she only come out at night?

We address the logistics of harvesting blood from members of the public; the poor economy of helping a mythical creature feed; and the benefits of travelling in the dead of night.

All of which leads to one question...

How would you survive?

Whatever happens, one thing's for sure...

Att fly är livet, at dröja döden

Another classic film solved by the best movie podcast in the world

How to Survive: The Wicker Man (1973) Aug 30, 2017

Show notes

It's episode 107... and something wicker this way comes...

The Wicker Man (1973) tells the story of Sgt. Howie of the Scottish constabulary. Howie is sent to the remote Hebredian island of Summerisle to investigate the disappearance of a young girl. What he finds is a town devoted to pagan rituals, but could something more sinister be brewing under the surface? (The answer is yes).

We discuss the importance of not drinking on the job; the lethal risks of a life of chastity; and the merits of a strong negotiation strategy when dealing with cult leaders.

All of which leads to one question...

How would you survive?

Whatever happens, one thing's for sure...

Take a seat. I believe it is better to receive a shock with the knees bent.

Another classic film solved by the best movie podcast in the world

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