How Married Are You?!

Latest Episodes:

My Fiancée Doesn’t Trust Me Around Other Women Feb 11, 2026

Show notes

What do you do when your partner’s “boundaries” start feeling like control?

In Episode 279, a listener writes in about being engaged to a woman who reacts strongly anytime other women are around. On a group trip, she told him to keep his distance from one woman she believed was staring at him. When that same woman ended up sitting next to him in an Uber, his fiancée texted him to move his legs away from her. Later, after a group dinner where he made casual conversation, she told him he violated her boundaries just by speaking to her.

He admits he has been dishonest in the past about women (though he says he has never physically cheated), and he understands that history has impacted trust. But now he feels anxious in public, avoids interactions with women altogether, and is wondering where the line is between respecting your partner’s boundaries and being managed by their insecurity.

We talk about what boundaries actually are versus what control looks like, how trauma and betrayal can create hypervigilance, and why trust cannot be rebuilt through constant monitoring. We also get into shared responsibility in relationships, how to communicate about triggers without making your partner responsible for your internal turmoil, and why this has to be addressed before marriage, not after.

Have you ever been in a relationship where “respect” started to feel like walking on eggshells?

Resources & Links

Release Rest Remain
https://a.co/d/ihBmSdO

Father Yourself First
https://www.amazon.com/Father-Yourself-First-Everything-Deserves/dp/1400252555

Yvette’s Email List
https://yvettehenry.com/join-the-list

Release Rest Remain Bible Reading Plan
https://www.bible.com/en/reading-plans/64646

Black Men’s Meeting
https://partiful.com/e/kuXEBUC7PHfydRmI3sz4?

Premarital Advantage
https://howmarriedareyoupodcast.mykajabi.com/offers/VAbsx8N2

HMAY Amazon Storefront (affiliate)
https://www.amazon.com/shop/howmarriedareyou?ref_=cm_sw_r_apin_aipsfshop_0EGMQR9KJ94D8YGCDMV7&language=en-US

I Keep Praying God Removes Him… But He’s Still Here #HMAY Ep. 278 Feb 04, 2026

Show notes

What do you do when you keep praying for God to remove someone… and they’re still here?

In Episode 278, a listener writes in about dating a man who came in strong — intentional, consistent, saying all the right things, and claiming his goal was marriage and family. But once she finally became his girlfriend, the effort disappeared. No thoughtfulness. No intentional dates. Barely any engagement. He doesn’t ask questions, doesn’t remember what she shares, talks over her, talks down to her, and she’s left wondering if he’s even a kind person.

What makes it harder is that it feels like no one in his world knows she exists — friends, family, everyone. She’s prayed and prayed for God to remove him if he isn’t meant for her… but instead of him leaving, they keep “working through it,” while going nowhere. Now she’s trying to discern whether this is God telling her to stay, or whether God has already shown her enough — and she needs to choose clarity, boundaries, and peace.

We talk about the danger of over-spiritualizing what’s actually a decision, why you can’t keep letting someone’s indecision set the pace for your life, and what it looks like to stop waiting for a person to change when the reality is already loud.

Have you ever stayed too long because you were waiting for God to make the exit obvious?

Resources & Links

Father Yourself First
https://www.amazon.com/Father-Yourself-First-Everything-Deserves/dp/1400252555

Release Rest Remain
https://a.co/d/ihBmSdO

Yvette’s Email List
https://yvettehenry.com/join-the-list

Release Rest Remain Bible Reading Plan
https://www.bible.com/en/reading-plans/64646

Premarital Advantage
https://howmarriedareyoupodcast.mykajabi.com/offers/VAbsx8N2

Black Men’s Meeting
https://partiful.com/e/kuXEBUC7PHfydRmI3sz4?

HMAY Amazon Storefront (affiliate)
https://www.amazon.com/shop/howmarriedareyou?ref_=cm_sw_r_apin_aipsfshop_0EGMQR9KJ94D8YGCDMV7&language=en-US

My Husband Turned MAGA and and I’m Struggling to Stay #HMAY Ep. 277 Jan 27, 2026

Show notes

What do you do when the person you married starts sounding like someone you never would’ve chosen?

In Episode 277, a 21-year-old listener writes in about getting married at 19… and feeling like her husband is unrecognizable now 😔.

They bonded over faith, culture, and shared values — even agreeing they’d never become “patriots.”

But after he joined the military and found community in a new environment, she says his beliefs shifted hard.

The jokes, the politics, the worldview, even the way he talks about people… it all feels like a different man 💔.

Now she’s stuck between two real fears: staying and slowly losing herself 🫥, or leaving and grieving a marriage she thought would be godly and lasting 🕊️.

She’s asking if it’s possible to raise kids in a home with split values, how to navigate someone you love when your convictions don’t match, and whether divorce is a wild thought… or a necessary one.

We talk honestly about what it means to navigate deep value differences inside a marriage, how to move carefully when emotions are already high 🧠, and why you can’t pretend something this deep is “just politics.”

💬 Join the Conversation

Have you ever had to navigate major value differences with someone you love?

What helped you communicate without shutting down — or blowing up?

Drop your thoughts in the comments 👇🏽

📚 Resources & Links

Father Yourself First
https://www.amazon.com/Father-Yourself-First-Everything-Deserves/dp/1400252555

Release Rest Remain
https://a.co/d/ihBmSdO

Premarital Advantage
https://howmarriedareyoupodcast.mykajabi.com/offers/VAbsx8N2

Yvette’s Email List
https://yvettehenry.com/join-the-list

Release Rest Remain Bible Reading Plan
https://www.bible.com/en/reading-plans/64646

Black Men’s Meeting
https://partiful.com/e/kuXEBUC7PHfydRmI3sz4?

Big A## Calendar
https://bit.ly/4rkZIE7

HMAY Amazon Storefront
https://www.amazon.com/shop/howmarriedareyou?ref_=cm_sw_r_apin_aipsfshop_0EGMQR9KJ94D8YGCDMV7&language=en-US

❤️ If this helped you, like the video, subscribe, and share it with someone navigating marriage, identity shifts, and hard conversations.

The One That Got Away…Is Back #HMAY Ep. 276 Jan 21, 2026

Show notes

Have you ever had a “what if” person… and you can’t tell if it’s God’s timing or an emotional trap?

In this episode, a listener writes in about a seven-year friendship that keeps circling back into something deeper. They’ve never kissed, she’s been abstinent for five years, and now — for the first time — their timing finally aligns to explore a relationship. But she’s torn: he’s warm, patient, and makes her feel safe… yet she’s afraid she’s been living more in fantasy than reality.

They’re long-distance, both navigating ADHD, and she’s trying to rebuild her faith while also wanting a partner who can lead spiritually — without performing faith just to keep her. So the real question becomes: is love and safety enough to take the risk, or is this a distraction that could derail her growth?

We talk about how to move forward with wisdom, how to check your “sober mind” when you’re already emotionally invested, and why you can’t keep someone in your life as a permanent what-if.

✨ What You’ll Hear

Izzy’s letter to Glen after Sydney’s passing (bring tissues)
Release Rest Remain update + the YouVersion Bible reading plan
Listener email: the long-distance “what if” friendship turning serious
ADHD, consistency, and what love looks like in real life
Faith alignment, spiritual leadership, and moving with a sober mind
Why “love is a risk” — and how to take it wisely
Parenting + marriage questions: balance, devotionals, and real-life routines

💬 Join the Conversation

Have you ever carried a “what if” relationship for years?
What helped you decide to risk it — or finally let it go?

❤️ If This Helped You

Like the video, subscribe, and share it with someone navigating long-distance love, boundaries, and faith alignment.

📚 Resources & Links

Father Yourself First
https://www.amazon.com/Father-Yourself-First-Everything-Deserves/dp/1400252555

Release Rest Remain
https://a.co/d/ihBmSdO

Release Rest Remain Bible Reading Plan
https://www.bible.com/en/reading-plans/64646

Premarital Advantage
https://howmarriedareyoupodcast.mykajabi.com/offers/VAbsx8N2

Saturday Men’s Group (Black men, 7 a.m. PT)
https://us02web.zoom.us/j/81971875325?pwd=cY3k96A8j1b0WMLPHF5ym0bNSNaRdj.1

Patreon Community
https://www.patreon.com/HMAY

Yvette’s Email List
https://yvettehenry.com/join-the-list

The Biggest Story Affiliate links mentioned in this episode
https://bit.ly/3Lx0Ipb
https://bit.ly/4qz1IIZ
https://bit.ly/3NDgUG1

HMAY Amazon Storefront (affiliate)
https://www.amazon.com/shop/howmarriedareyou?ref_=cm_sw_r_apin_aipsfshop_0EGMQR9KJ94D8YGCDMV7&language=en-US

I Want Friends, He Wants Peace #HMAY Ep. 275 Jan 13, 2026

Show notes

In this episode, we talk honestly about something we’re still learning how to navigate in our own marriage: celebration, hosting, and friendship.

We unpack a real disagreement between us — one where gathering people, creating moments, and hosting feels meaningful and necessary to one of us, while the other experiences those same moments as pressure, disruption, and emotional overload. Neither of us is wrong, but the tension between those needs has shown up more than once over the years.

We share what that conflict actually looked like, how it connected to deeper questions about friendship, emotional capacity, and being known, and what it took for us to repair without one of us shrinking or the other feeling dismissed.

This conversation is about learning each other again, choosing honesty over peacekeeping, and figuring out how to stay connected without losing yourself in the process.

Resources & Links

Release Rest Remain

https://a.co/d/ihBmSdO

Yvette’s Email List

https://yvettehenry.com/join-the-list

Release Rest Remain Bible Reading Plan

https://www.bible.com/en/reading-plans/64646

Father Yourself First

https://www.amazon.com/Father-Yourself-First-Everything-Deserves/dp/1400252555

Audiobook

Listen to Glen read Father Yourself First wherever audiobooks are available.

Premarital Advantage

Questions and worksheets for dating, engaged, and newlyweds

https://howmarriedareyoupodcast.mykajabi.com/offers/VAbsx8N2

Saturday Men’s Group (Black men, 7 a.m. PT)

Join the Father Meet-Up on Zoom

https://us02web.zoom.us/j/81971875325?pwd=cY3k96A8j1b0WMLPHF5ym0bNSNaRdj.1

Patreon Community

Bonus conversations and behind-the-scenes content

https://www.patreon.com/HMAY

Join the Conversation

Do you and your partner experience celebration or hosting differently?

Have you ever realized you were arguing about something deeper than what was on the surface?

If This Helped You

Like the video, subscribe, and share it with someone navigating recurring tension, friendship shifts, or emotional capacity in marriage.

Married, Lonely, and Afraid to Talk About It #HMAY Ep. 274 Jan 07, 2026

Show notes

In this episode of How Married Are You, we respond to a listener email from a newly married wife who’s quietly struggling with loneliness. Between long work hours, late nights, exhaustion, and limited time together, she’s worried this season might become their new normal — and she doesn’t want to come across as ungrateful or like a nag for wanting more connection.

We talk honestly about marriage seasons, why hard rhythms don’t automatically mean something is wrong, and how to tell the difference between a temporary grind and a deeper issue. Glen and Yvette share what they would do differently if they could revisit similar seasons in their own marriage, and why how you show up now impacts the seasons ahead.

This conversation covers:

How to survive a lonely season in marriage
Communicating needs without resentment
Why seasons change (even when they feel endless)
Staying connected when schedules don’t align
Building support and community outside your spouse

If you’re married and wondering, “Is this just a season — or is this our forever?” this episode is for you.

Resources & Links

Order the book: Father Yourself First https://www.amazon.com/Father-Yourself-First-Everything-Deserves/dp/1400252555]

Order the book: Release • Rest • Remain https://a.co/d/ihBmSdO](https://a.co/d/ihBmSdO

Audiobook: Listen to Glen read Father Yourself First wherever audiobooks are available.

Premarital Advantage: Questions and worksheets for dating, engaged, and newlyweds https://howmarriedareyoupodcast.mykajabi.com/offers/VAbsx8N2

Saturday Men’s Group (Black men, 7 a.m. PT): Join the Father Meet-Up on Zoom https://us02web.zoom.us/j/81971875325?pwd=cY3k96A8j1b0WMLPHF5ym0bNSNaRdj.1

Patreon Community: Access bonus conversations and behind-the-scenes content [https://www.patreon.com/HMAY](https://www.patreon.com/HMAY)

Young Thug Thinks Therapy Makes Him “Less of a Man” Dec 31, 2025

Show notes

Happy Holidays, y’all! As the year comes to a close, we’re taking a short break from our regularly scheduled podcast episodes to rest, reset, and be present. As a little holiday gift, we’re sharing a conversation from the Patreon vault that you may have missed. If you enjoy conversations like this, join us on Patreon for weekly bonus conversations after every podcast.

In this Patreon vault episode, Glen and Yvette unpack a viral and troubling clip where Young Thug admits he would feel “less of a man” if his partner went to therapy. From there, the conversation widens into a powerful discussion about ego, control, emotional safety, and why discouraging therapy is a major red flag — not masculinity.

They talk honestly about why no one person can (or should) be everything for their partner, the importance of having trusted people outside your relationship, and how healthy love actually encourages growth rather than isolating it. Glen shares why leaning on close friends and therapy has been essential for him, and Yvette reflects on why that support doesn’t threaten marriage — it strengthens it.

The episode also touches on friendships, safe spaces, healing masculinity, and how parenting (especially raising a daughter) sharpens awareness around emotional health and self-worth.

This conversation is candid, thought-provoking, and grounding — especially for anyone navigating relationships, mental health, or redefining strength and support.

👉 Join us on Patreon for weekly bonus conversations and exclusive content:
www.patreon.com/HMAY

Who You Marry Is Not Who You End Up With Dec 24, 2025

Show notes

In this vault conversation, Glen and Yvette explore a question many people wrestle with quietly: Can you marry someone hoping they’ll change — and is that fair? They unpack the difference between growth and expectation, why marrying “potential” can create pressure and resentment, and the importance of accepting who someone is right now, not who you hope they’ll become.

They also talk about dating with intention, how church culture and timelines can blur discernment, and why observing real-life behavior — especially around children, responsibility, and family roles — matters before making lifelong commitments.

The episode then shifts into a heartfelt reflection on parenting, particularly how raising a daughter has reshaped self-awareness, healing, and urgency around personal growth. From body image conversations to protecting innocence, it’s an honest look at how becoming parents often forces us to confront ourselves.

This conversation is reflective, humorous, and grounding — perfect for anyone dating seriously, married and reassessing expectations, or parenting while still growing.

👉 Join us on Patreon for weekly bonus conversations and exclusive content:
www.patreon.com/HMAY

Did I Romanticize My Husband? #HMAY Ep. 273 Dec 16, 2025

Show notes

This episode centers on one big listener question: Did I romanticize my husband — and overlook red flags while dating?

A newly married listener from South Africa writes in just three months after the wedding, struggling with harsh words during conflict, old wounds resurfacing, and the fear that she may have confused spiritual compatibility with true emotional safety.

We unpack what “gentleness” should look like in marriage, how triggers differ from cruelty, and why sober-minded dating matters more than shared ministry or chemistry.

And… BIG NEWS: Yvette is officially an author! We talk through her new devotional Release • Rest • Remain, the John 15 rhythm that helped her rebuild her spiritual foundation, and why preorders matter for first-time authors.

✨ What You’ll Hear

Chocolate Baby Storytime: evil drawings, angel drawings, and toddler chaos
Uzi’s 6-goal hockey game & homeschool updates
The story behind Release • Rest • Remain and how the devotional was born
Listener Email: Did I romanticize this relationship?
Emotional triggers vs. emotional harm in early marriage
The importance of gentleness, safety, and sober-minded dating
How upbringing and humor styles shape conflict
Patreon preview: the viral “flat tire” clip & weaponized tears
“How Married Are You?” moments

📚 Resources & Links Order Yvette’s Devotional: 👉 Release, Rest, Remain: A 30-Day Devotional to Embrace Abiding Over Striving https://a.co/d/4ATlBWO

Glen’s Book — Father Yourself First: 👉 https://www.amazon.com/Father-Yourself-First-Everything-Deserves/dp/1400252555

🎧 Audiobooks Available wherever audiobooks are sold.

📍 Follow @beleafmel https://www.instagram.com/beleafmel

💍 Premarital Advantage (PMA) https://howmarriedareyoupodcast.mykajabi.com/offers/VAbsx8N2

🌿 Patreon Community www.patreon.com/HMAY 💬

Join the Conversation Have you ever looked back and realized you romanticized a relationship? How did you regain clarity or rebuild trust? Share below.

Are We Unequally Yoked? #HMAY Ep. 272 Dec 09, 2025

Show notes

This episode dives into one major listener question: Are we unequally yoked? A 31-year-old Christian single mom writes in, deeply in love and preparing for engagement — but scared that her Protestant faith and her partner’s Eastern Orthodox roots might create cracks later. We unpack theology vs. lifestyle, how beliefs show up in everyday routines, and what unity actually looks like when two people worship differently but love Jesus fully.

We also share a joyful, chaotic Chocolate Baby Storytime from a commercial shoot involving $15k cameras, water balloons, and children who absolutely refused to listen 😂. And… BIG NEWS: Yvette is officially an author! We talk through her new 30-day devotional Release, Rest, Remain: A 30-Day Devotional to Embrace Abiding Over Striving and why this rhythm has helped her heal, surrender, and stay grounded.

Plus, a vulnerable update from our “4th baby mama” listener and a needed reminder that shame from strangers online is not your inheritance.

This one is heartfelt, thoughtful, funny, and full of real clarity for anyone navigating faith, family, and long-term commitment.

✨ What You’ll Hear

Chocolate Baby Storytime: commercial-set chaos, kids, cameras, and water balloons
Yvette’s new 30-day devotional & the story behind Release, Rest, Remain: A 30-Day Devotional to Embrace Abiding Over Striving
Is this relationship truly unequally yoked? Breaking down Protestant vs. Eastern Orthodox
Theology differences vs. lifestyle differences — what actually impacts a home
The “4th baby mama” follow-up + why the internet’s shame has no authority over you

📚 Resources & Links

Order Yvette’s Devotional:

👉 Release, Rest, Remain: A 30-Day Devotional to Embrace Abiding Over Striving: https://a.co/d/4ATlBWO

Father Yourself First (Glen’s Book):

👉 https://www.amazon.com/Father-Yourself-First-Everything-Deserves/dp/1400252555

🎧 Audiobook:

Glen narrates the full audiobook wherever audiobooks are sold.

📍 Follow @beleafmel for tour dates, signings & updates

https://www.instagram.com/beleafmel

💍 Premarital Advantage (PMA):

Tools for dating, engaged, or rebuilding couples

https://howmarriedareyoupodcast.mykajabi.com/offers/VAbsx8N2