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Join us as we talk with Tanya Faisal all about ADHD and homeschool. We'll talk about what ADHD actually is, what it can look like, and how we can support our kids. Fall 2022 Season Sponsors We are so grateful to our Fall 2022 Season Sponsors. Use the links below for their special offerings: Blossom & Root and use code HSUnrefined15 for 15% off your purchase Outschool and use code Unrefined for $20 off your first class Night Zookeeper for a 7-day, risk-free trial, as well as 50% off an annual subscription LTWs Maren: Wakanda Forever Angela: Bad Vibes Only by Nora McInerny Connect with us! Visit our website Sign up for our newsletter and get our Top 100 Inclusive Book List We are listener supported! Support us on Patreon Follow us on Facebook, Instagram, Twitter and see video episodes now on Youtube Angela on Instagram: @unrefinedangela | Maren on Instagram: @unrefinedmaren and @alwayslearningwithmaren Email us any questions or feedback at homeschoolunrefined@gmail.com Complete Episode Transcript [00:00:10] Angela: hi, we are Maren and Angela of homeschool, unrefined. Over the past 25 years, we've been friends, teachers, homeschool parents and podcasters, together with our master's degrees and 20 years combined homeschooling. We're here to rethink homeschooling, learning, and education with an inclusive and authentic lens. [00:00:29] At Homeschool Under You find, we prioritize things like giving yourself credit, building strong connections, respectful parenting, interest led playing and learning, learning differences, mental health, self care, and listening to and elevating LGBTQ plus and bipo voices. We are here to encourage and support you. [00:00:51] Whether you're a new homeschooler, a veteran, you love curriculum, you're an unschooler. Whether all your kids are at home or all your kids are in school, or somewhere in [00:01:00] between. Wherever you are in your journey, we're the voice in your head telling you, you're doing great, and so are your kids. This is episode 2 0 1, homeschool and ADHD with Tanya Feil. [00:01:13] Tonya and I talked about lots, the lots of things about adhd, what it actually is, what it looks like, and how we can support our kids with adhd. And then we'll end like we always do with our lt. Ws loving this. Before we get to that we wanted to just let everyone know about our December class in Patreon. [00:01:35] Mm-hmm. , it's gonna be called How We Winter Break. It's all about the importance of taking a winter break and our best tips for doing so. We're super excited about that because we really are passionate about it. It is, we love breaks, , we're passionate of all breaks. We are. It is Tuesday, December 6th at one o'clock. [00:01:53] If you join us on Patriot at the $10 level Central. Yeah. Yeah. One o'clock Central. Mm-hmm. . You will get information [00:02:00] and a Zoom link for that. Yes. , [00:02:03] we know finding a curriculum that meets your needs is tough, and that's why we're excited to partner with Blossom and Root. Blossom. And Root is a nature focused secular homeschool curriculum, focusing on creativity, science, nature, literature, and the arts. [00:02:20] Blossom and Root has been gently encouraging and supporting homeschooling families around the globe since 2000. Blossom and Root currently offers curricula for pre-K through fifth grade with new levels being added in the future. Additionally, a three volume inclusive US history curriculum told from a variety of viewpoints is currently in development as of August, 2022, volume one is available for purchase and volume two is available on presale. All profits from this history curriculum. A River of Voices will be used to support storytellers and artists from historically excluded communities. You can find [00:03:00] samples, scope, and sequences and information about each of their levels online at Blossom and Root dot. [00:03:07] You can also find them on Instagram at Blossom and Root. Blossom and Root has created a special discount for our listeners. Use the code Hs. Unrefined 15 at checkout for 15% off your purchase. We're so happy to be partnering with Out School this season because they are our favorite way to outsource. We know that kids who love to learn don't just prepare for the future. [00:03:30] They create it. That's why Out School has reimagined online learning to empower kids and teens to expand their creativity, wonder and knowledge. Empathetic, passionate teachers encourage learners ages three to 18 to explore their. Connect with diverse peers from around the world and take an active role in leading their learning out. [00:03:51] School has created a world filled with endless possibilities for every schooling journey. Explore over 140,000 fun and flexible [00:04:00] live online classes to find the right fit for your family and join us as we set learning free. Sign up today at Out schooler.me/homeschool unrefined, and get up to $20 off your first class when you enroll with the code Unre. [00:04:15] Angela and I love using technology to teach specific skills, and that's one reason we are excited to introduce you tonight, zookeeper. Is your child a reluctant writer? Do they struggle with reading? If your answer to either of these questions is yes, the Night Zookeeper may be just what you're looking for. [00:04:33] Night Zookeeper is an online learning program for children, ages six to 12 years old that uses a gamified and creative approach to help to keep kids engaged and focused on developing awesome reading and writing skills. I, while having fun at the same. Some of the features we love include the educational games, the personalized feedback on writing from real tutors and the super safe community pages where children [00:05:00] can work with each other and learn together. [00:05:02] If Night Zookeeper sounds like the perfect learning program for your child, you can try it for free by clicking on the link in the show notes. When you register it, you'll get a seven day risk free trial, as well as a huge 50% off annual subscription. That's a great deal if you ask. We are so excited to welcome back Tanya Fel, who is the creator of the YouTube channel project. [00:05:26] Happy Home. Tanya is a doctor and a lawyer turned homeschool parent who talks a lot about homeschool curriculum and adhd, and much more on her YouTube channel and on her social media. So please enjoy this conversation with Tanya. [00:05:42] Maren: Thank you so much, Tanya, for joining us today. We're so glad you're. It [00:05:46] Tanya: is my pleasure to be back. [00:05:49] Maren: Yes. All right. So do, maybe we should just start with a reminder. Maybe you can tell everyone a little bit about yourself, your story, and Sure. What [00:06:00] you are doing now. [00:06:01] Tanya: So, I've been on social media, you know, in the world, the greater world for, I don't know, about seven years now. [00:06:08] I got on right as we started homeschooling, and I started my homeschool journey because my son was, you know, having trouble in kindergarten. And we had explored what could be causing that trouble and, you know, found out that it was adhd. And as all of that was happening, I thought it would be nice to find community. [00:06:28] And a lot of the information that I found initially was online. Mm-hmm. from moms who were going through it and. Sharing our story really was out of like gratitude to them. You know, it was like a, I realized how much that helped me and I thought, okay, so if I can share my experience, then it can help other people in the same way, you know, as a mom to mom, kind of, you know, parent to parent level. [00:06:51] Absolutely. Communication. So since then, I mean, I've continued the YouTube channel and the Instagram account under Project Happy Home, and we just talk [00:07:00] about all the day to day stuff. But also I focus on ADHD a little bit because mm-hmm. , that's really where our journey started. So [00:07:08] Maren: did you know a lot about ADHD before you started, before you started homeschooling? [00:07:12] Or did you have knowledge of it or? [00:07:14] Tanya: I come from a medical background, so I had knowledge of it, but I had no personal knowledge of adhd, you know, and it was, I, I think that even in the last five years, we've come a long way in like decreasing the stigma behind these different learning styles and learning abilities and learning, you know, Just modes of brain wiring. [00:07:36] You know, I think we've come a long way in like being able to be open about what challenges our kids are facing and what challenges we are facing, you know, [00:07:45] Maren: as adults. Absolutely. Okay. So you, you started, you started really studying because you had a personal, your, your son, you realized, you realized he had adhd and so you did a lot of research and Yeah. [00:07:58] And, and [00:08:00] communication and communicating with other parents and things like [00:08:03] Tanya: that. Yeah, because I, I mean, all the things I had read officially about adhd Yeah. Can one come from very different camps of thinking about whether you're gonna medicate or not medicate? Yeah. Whether it even exists or it doesn't exist. [00:08:16] But I found that the most helpful things that I learned were from parents. Mm-hmm. , you know, whether it was on like chat groups, on those official websites about adhd or whether it was like YouTube videos or Instagram accounts, because. I think that while professionals can have a lot of opinions about what is physiologically causing this and how we can treat it and everything, I think parents have the issue of like, so how do I get my child to Right. [00:08:44] Put their clothes in the hamper , right? [00:08:46] Maren: Yes. You know? Yes. Okay. We're gonna get to that too. We're gonna get to things like that in just a minute. But first, let's maybe just start at the beginning and let's talk about what ADHD actually is, because it sometimes feels like [00:09:00] in intangible it's like, well, it's these behaviors. [00:09:02] Is it just these behaviors? That's what I think there's this perception, but what really [00:09:07] Tanya: is it? So that's, I think, a hard question to nail down because there is disagreement about what it is if you're talking about it from a physiologic standpoint. Right? Yep. There's still a lot of medical disagreement about whether you actually have. [00:09:23] Physiologic changes in the brain or whether you don't. I find that amazing that that's still up idea. I do [00:09:30] Maren: too. I do too. I think that's it. It's just amazing to me that there isn't more information out there or research or work on this right now. I think especially, especially now. But yeah, because it is you know, from my own study and research, and you can tell me what you've also learned because this is how we do it. [00:09:50] Like, we kind of just say, well, this is what I've learned and this is what you've learned and let's talk about it. But it's, for me, what I think about first is, is a [00:10:00] differently wired brain. Yeah. And especially. I think about the prefrontal cortex, which is at the, you know, the very front of your brain and how it's often less developed or and so it's possibly, it's possibly delayed. [00:10:14] And a lot of that prefrontal cortex part of your brain coincides with executive functioning emotional regulation kind of logic and understanding those, you know, understanding logic sometimes Yeah. And things like that. Is that what you have also found? [00:10:29] Tanya: Yeah. I think that there's a lot of research indicate regardless of what is actually going on with neurotransmitters and the, you know, the way the brain is developing, maturing, yeah. [00:10:40] I think that they've definitely established a lack of working memory in these kids. That too. So, yes. Working memory, being that, exactly what you were talking about, that being able to take this short term knowledge, this short term instruction, this short term visual, and transforming it into a list of steps that [00:11:00] you mm-hmm. [00:11:00] you know mm-hmm. , if this, then all of these things, that connection and that has a lot to do with prefrontal cortex and how it connects to all of your other lobes, really. Right, right, right. So, I think regardless of what's going on, I think we should focus as parents on like, how does that manifest for us in our kids? [00:11:18] Like, what is actually happening? Because, like you said, we can ignore, you know, we can talk about the behaviors like the, the fidgeting or the lack of attention, and sort of forget about all the other pieces that come with that lack of working memory. Like, you know, the reaction times being slowed to someone's facial expression, the inability to realize that you've missed a step. [00:11:40] You know, in what you were supposed to do next then. And just all of these things that can be perceived as disrespectful and lazy and, you know, irresponsible. Mm-hmm. just being actual, you know, brain wiring like issues, right? [00:11:56] Maren: Yes, yes. So it, yes, that has, that [00:12:00] has helped me a lot over the past few years to understand that it is, it is to me quite physiological. [00:12:07] Mm-hmm. Instead of choices, bad choices. Yeah. Or, or just a tendency to not be able to do things you don't wanna do. Like you have to step it up, you know? Yeah. And so it's much easier to understand when it is just, it, it, it does to me seem like now a much more physiological and, and real tangible thing. [00:12:27] Tanya: I think people should realize it. Like the, you know, it is a disability that if you are an adult and in a workplace and you can, you know, apply for accommodations. So we all hesitate to use the word disability, but I think it's important to realize that like medically and psychologically speaking, like it has qualified itself to receive help for adults. [00:12:51] You know, like people who are functioning, like working members of society. And I think that that is important because yes, labels matter, but [00:13:00] I think it's important because it's a real thing. The thing that offends me the most is when people say that ADHD isn't real. Yes. And that it's just behavioral and just choices. [00:13:10] And I think. To know that it's recognized officially by people who give out money , you know, to, like, that's a hard, a hard call for the government, you know, like, I think that that's important to realize that that is, it has passed that bar, that discussion should be over. [00:13:25] Maren: Yes, absolutely. Yep. You are so right. [00:13:27] But, and I do think I get why it feels like, like I said, it does feel a little bit intangible, and I think sometimes that is, because it looks so different for everyone too. So it might not necessarily be just a, a, you know, not being able to complete a task or something. It might, like you said, might not, it might be more working memory not being able to remember or, you know, memorize things that you need to memorize, or it might be, you know, emotional dysregulation or things like that. [00:13:58] So it's sometimes [00:14:00] hard to pinpoint like, oh, this person definitely has ADHD because they have, they do this, this, and this, because it, you know, it can look so different. But also that's why probably getting a test is really, is really important. Yeah. So that you can, you can identify it and move forward. [00:14:17] Yeah. So I [00:14:18] Tanya: was 95% sure that my childhood had ADHD when I took them in for their very expensive testing. Exactly. It wasn't covere…
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