HERself

Latest Episodes:

160. When Worry Becomes an Issue with Kate Borsato Dec 19, 2022

Show notes

What is the difference between worry and anxiety? And how do we recognize when our thoughts are causing a negative impact on our everyday lives? This week we are bringing Kate Borsato back on the show to discuss this matter. Kate is a therapist who specializes in anxiety, especially in motherhood. She talks to us about what exactly worry is compared to anxiety and offers great suggestions on what we can do if we recognize some of these problematic symptoms in ourselves.

Kate guides us through different exercises including how to surrender to our anxious thoughts and focus our attention on what we do want to be thinking about instead. She encourages us to write down what a good mother means to us and to make sure we are including ourselves on that list. Even things like deep breathing are exercises that can help get us out of that worrisome headspace and back to where our feet are planted.

So many of us can relate to the struggle we have when we are able to watch our partners participate in a mindless, relaxing activity for a few hours at a time when we ourselves simply cannot. Kate goes into details about how society puts this pressure on moms to constantly be productive and suggests that we take a page right out of our partner's playbook by allowing ourselves to participate in activities that make us feel creative.

If you worry that your anxious tendencies are going to be passed on to your children, listen in. Kate explains that those of us who are more prone to anxiety can be caused by many factors including childhood trauma, abusive romantic relationships, or we may just be genetically more prone to worry.

Kate Borsato’s Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/kateborsato/

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159. Why Adult Friendships are Hard and How to Make Them Work with Dr. Miriam Kirmayer Dec 12, 2022

Show notes

Adult friendships are hard. We hear this over and over again from our community. That is why we are so excited to sit down with Dr. Miriam Kirmayer today to discuss what we can do to foster, build, and maintain these special relationships in our lives.

Dr. Miriam is a clinical psychologist, writer, speaker, and friendship expert who has spent a decade researching the science of friendship and social connection. She shares with us her expertise on how we can build new friendships as adults and how we can stay connected to our friends once we become parents.

If your friendships have taken a back burner since you became an adult, this episode will strike a cord. Dr. Miriam goes into simple techniques we can use to make sure there is a match between the type of support that’s being given from our friends and the type that we are really looking for.

She helps us navigate the tough situation of ending long term friendships and identifying when they are no longer serving us. We can only entertain so many friendships at once. Dr. Miriam helps us recognize when it's time to let friendships go so we can make room for new ones.

If adult friendships have been a struggle for you, know that you are not alone. We hope this episode helps you get some ideas on how you can better your relationship with your current friends and put yourself out there to make new ones!

MEET Dr. Miriam Kirmayer: https://www.instagram.com/miriamkirmayer/

Dr. Miriam’s Website: https://www.miriamkirmayer.com/

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158. Real Parenting: How We Parent Our Big Reactors Dec 05, 2022

Show notes

This week we are trying something new. We’ve decided to implement the things that we learned from our interview with Claire Lerner last week. We both have children who we consider to be big reactors. So we took our insights from our conversation with Claire and put them into action in our own homes!

One of Amy’s biggest takeaways was that each of her children might need individualized things. Her big reactor needs to be parented differently than his brothers. Continual praise and more time are a coping mechanism that seem to help.

Abby realized that when these types of kids have these big reactions they aren’t trying to cause a challenge. They are just trying to react in a way that their own body needs. They’re more sensitive, more empathetic, and look at the world in their own unique way.

The thing that we want you to know is that we don’t get it perfect every time. We are learning right alongside you. We are both, everyday, normal moms who aren’t experts. We struggle through this parenting thing as well. And it does get better. Both of our big reactors are around age five now and it has taken us a little longer to learn what parenting techniques work. We are making progress and hope this episode helps you do the same.

If you missed last week’s episode with Claire Lerner, be sure to listen here:
157. Real Parenting: What to Do When the Script Doesn't Work with Claire Lerner
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157. Real Parenting: What to Do When the Script Doesn't Work with Claire Lerner Nov 28, 2022

Show notes

We both have experience raising children who seem to not respond to gentle parenting. It has been frustrating for the both of us at times because it has made us feel isolated and exhausted. We are so excited to have Claire Lerner on today to share her expertise in this area.
Claire shares what to do if your child is wired differently during moments of aggression towards others. She explains that our children are not trying to be manipulative in any way, just that they need boundaries to help themselves regulate.
Have you ever wondered if timeouts are truly a thing of the past? Claire explains her concept of a safe space break and how this alone time can help kids get back to a place of calm.
With it being the middle of the holiday season, we know that these large family gatherings can be major triggers for our kiddos who tend to be big reactors. Claire helps us navigate the conversations we can have with not only our friends and family members, but with our children's teachers as well.
And next week, we will both share our learnings from implementing Claire's strategies into our own households. So be sure to tune in to hear how these teachings are helping us with our own personal situations at home.
Meet Claire.
Visit Claire's website.
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156. All Your Questions Answered: The Episode Built Around Your Top Q's Nov 21, 2022

Show notes

This week we are answering your questions you submitted on Instagram. We know several of you are probably busy with your families this week and we wanted to keep this episode lighthearted and fun.

We know as business partners that it can be hard to get along all the time. We dive into whether or not we fight a lot and what we appreciate the most about one another. Another relationship several of you had questions on was the ones we have with our spouses. Tune in to hear what we are both currently working on in our marriages.

As many of you know we have both been on health journeys and we share where we are at when it comes to our mental and physical wellbeing. Amy shares details on how she is focusing on her nutrition whereas Abby gets into the nitty gritty on her journey with SSRIs.

We go into what each of our families do as rituals around the holidays and what our typical morning routines look like. You’ll be surprised to hear that Abby’s changes on a daily basis.

If you have been with us since the beginning of this podcast, we want to thank you for following along. Many of you are wondering if or when a HERself podcast event is in the making? Tune in to this week’s episode to learn more about where we are at with that!
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155. The Holiday Survival Episode Nov 14, 2022

Show notes

With the holidays quickly approaching, we want to bring you an episode that we hope will help you to stay sane during this busy time! As you know, we are both moms of three kids each, and this is our 7th year of having children during the holidays. Needless to say, we have learned so much throughout our own journeys and we’re here to share the tips and tricks for what to do, as well as what not to do, during the holiday season.

A lot of what we talk about today will not only help you this year in the moments of overwhelm you might experience, but we want it to make future holidays easier for you, more streamlined, and to give you the space that you need so that you can actually be present and enjoy the time with your loved ones!

We love hearing where you are when you listen to our podcast! Are you on a walk, on a break, or listening somewhere else? Tag us over on Instagram, @herselfpodcast and let us know, and if you found this episode helpful in planning for the holidays, we would be so grateful if you shared it with others!

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103. Nedra Tawwab on Reclaiming Yourself Through Setting Boundaries

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154. Getting Real on Relationships After Kids with the Shrink Chicks Nov 07, 2022

Show notes

You’re in for treat today, as our special guests are Emmalee and Jennifer from the Shrink Chicks, who are also the co-founders of The Therapy Group. In this episode, they share their expertise on conflict resolution and communication strategies to use in your romantic relationship. We really felt like we were getting couples therapy in front of thousands of people during this conversation, as they covered so many of the issues that many of us face in our relationships!

Before diving in, we want to give the disclaimer that what we talk about here is for people that are in healthy relationships, and if there is any sort of abuse happening, these things won’t apply to your relationship.

A key message that we took from what Emmalee and Jennifer had to share is that we really don’t need to be having these conversations on our own. Go seek the resources and get the right tools in place so that you can have a better life and stronger relationship with your partner!

As always, we want to hear your feedback and the biggest takeaways from what you heard in this episode, so please share your thoughts on Instagram and tag us, @shrinkchicks and @herselfpodcast.
MEET Emmalee and Jennifer: https://www.instagram.com/shrinkchicks/
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Links & Resources:

ShrinkChicks Website, Instagram & Podcast

The Therapy Group Website & Instagram

Enroll in the HERself Self-Care Course

The New Rules of Marriage by Terrance Real

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153. Everything You Need to Know During Sick Season with Pediatrician @resilientrascals Oct 31, 2022

Show notes

We are releasing this episode because we know that in addition to us, so many other people need it too. Today’s guest is Dr. Anjuli Gans, a board-certified pediatrician and educator who runs the platform Resilient Rascals, and in this episode, we’re diving into all things kid sickness.

Dr. Anjuli reveals how we as parents can deal with our kids being sick, and what she shares is not only honest, but her tips and advice on this topic is both realistic and practical. We are in this with you, as we’ve certainly been in situations where our kids have been sick and have experienced the impact it has on everyone in the family. We learned so much from Dr. Anjuli today, and we’re so excited for you to learn and use this information as well!

As always, we want to hear your feedback and the biggest takeaways from what you heard in this episode, so please share your thoughts on Instagram and tag us, @resilientrascals and @herselfpodcast.

MEET Dr. Anjuli: https://www.instagram.com/resilientrascals/

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Her Resource, Your Baby’s Health Handbook
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152. A Candid Motherhood Conversation with @diaryofanhonestmom Oct 24, 2022

Show notes

Today we are excited to speak with Libby Ward from Diary of an Honest Mom, as so many of you have reached out and asked us to have her on the podcast!

Libby is a digital creator, speaker and mental health advocate with a deep commitment to breaking the cycles of trauma. She is known for talking about the hard things that mothers face through storytelling, while using humor and a lot of vulnerability. Her mission is to help other women realize that they are good moms, just as they are!

We feel the reason that Libby resonates with so many people, and so deeply too, is that she shares with a level of honesty that we’re just not used to hearing today. We hope that you find this interview as inspirational and inspiring as we did, and we’d be so happy if you shared it on Instagram, tagging us @diaryofanhonestmom and @herselfpodcast.
MEET Libby: https://www.instagram.com/diaryofanhonestmom/

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Links & Resources:

Libby’s Website , Blog, TikTok & Instagram
Get Libby’s Free Honest Mom Journal

Her Instagram Reel, An alternative take on the first four years

Fair Play & Find Your Unicorn Space by Eve Rodsky

HERself Self-Care Course

150. Overwhelmed? This One’s for You.

Roadmap: if you like this episode, make sure to listen to these:

117: HERself Expert Larissa Geleris on Overstimulation in Parenthood

114: HERself Expert: Stephi Wagner on the Mother Wound

106. HERself Expert: Author Eve Rodsky on Sharing the Load at Home

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151. Wills, Trusts, and Everything You Need to Know about Future Planning Oct 17, 2022

Show notes

Before we jump into this episode, we wanted to let you know that it is longer than our usual episodes, and we talk about some heavy stuff in this one. In fact, this might be the type of episode where you take a couple of breaks while listening, and one that you send to your partner to check out. Today, we’ll be talking about what would happen if we should die, which is a topic that could take a while for you to process, because as you’ll hear, there is a lot to consider here.

Our expert guest today is attorney Eric Christoffersen, who has been with the law firm Grams & Christoffersen for 13 years and counting. He started as a law student, clerking for Founder, David F. Grams who established the firm nearly 30 years ago. After graduating law school, cum laude from the University of Wisconsin Law School, he became an associate attorney and then later a shareholder. Now with 11+ years of practice experience he is the Managing Shareholder of Grams & Christoffersen, S.C., leading a great team to serve their clients into the future.

We think this episode with Eric is a really important one, and we discuss something that a lot of people will go through in their lifetimes. We feel that thinking about the future is worth having an entire episode on, and we hope you get a lot from this interview with Eric, who was in charge of helping Amy plan for her future.

If you found this episode informative and helpful, we would love it if you shared it with your friends and loved ones, and let us know your biggest takeaway by tagging @gcestatelaw and @herselfpodcast on Instagram!

MEET Eric: https://www.instagram.com/gcestatelaw/

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Website: www.dfgrams.com

Email: info@dfgrams.com

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