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With heart and humor, Eve Sturges explores the modern landscape of DNA testing after a single phone call turns her world upside down. By talking with others who have had “DNA discoveries,” Eve hopes to change the conversation around secrets, shame, family, and identity.
Copyright: © Eve Sturges
Eve talks with Margo about the experience of writing her second book When You Shake The Family Tree. Topics Discussed: DNA-Discovery, Expectations, Sobriety, Therapy. (Also discussed: babies, and the Los Angeles fires.)
After 25 years in public education, Margo has decided to use her masters degree and teaching experience to become a personal empowerment mentor. Her first memoir published in 2022, entitled “When the Apple Fall Far from the Tree,” outlines a lifetime of adversity and the tools she used to make it to the other side.
From growing up chaotic in a house of violence, to cancer recovery, weight loss surgery, a newly sober lifestyle, and a spiritual awakening- Margo feels compelled to share the “gifts” she has discovered along her path of personal growth.
She is the creator of the blog site, justbeingjill.com where you can learn more about the birth of her pen name, Margo Reilly. Margo has recently completed a life coach course and soon hopes to be assisting others with their own transformational journeys.
Her sequel memoir, When You Shake the Family Tree, launched in December 2024. In her latest work, she details her journey of self-acceptance and healing after learning she was not exactly who she thought she was after taking an Ancestry DNA test.
She is eager to share how she navigated her identity crisis in hopes of inspiring others to find their way forward.
Jessica Pearson came out of the fog as an adopted person, and wants to help other adoptees improve their lives. She's a life coach, so Eve uses the episode as an opportunity to discuss the basic differences between life-coaching and therapy.
Jessica Pearson's Info:
Last summer, Eve took her family in a van for the Everything's Relative Roadtrip. First stop: Strathmore. Jason and Miguel: Like Father, Like Son is a personal favorite; Eve wanted to see Miguel again, this time on his own home turf.
Eve Sturges, host of Everything's Relative Podcast, launches a new series with her friend Sheridan Anderson. They talk about whatever they want, as long as it's related to the DNA-discovery experience in one way or another. This is a series that offers listeners and guests a more casual (less edited!) approach to the DNA-Discovery conversation. Eve invites any guest from previous seasons to return with updates about their own story, and will also allow other people to talk about their own books or projects as long as they can prove it's related to DNA-Discovery.
from this episode: "There Must Be A Pony"
***
Eve Sturges and Erin Cosentino talk about Everything's Relative Roadtrip, and what's in store for season 6.
For new listeners, Welcome to Everything's Relative Podcast. Eve uses this platform to talk about DNA-discoveries and the growing phenomenon of misattributed parentage.
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SUPPORT LAUREN'S FILM HERE: SEED & SPARK
READ HER STORY HERE.
Lauren is using her own story as a Donor Conceived Person to open up conversation about transparency, and the absurdity so many people in the DNA-discovery community face.
***
Discount Code Magic Mind Focus Energy Drink! https://www.magicmind.com/EVERYTHINGEVE20 (Affiliate Sponsorship)
***
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***Contribute To Seed & Spark Campaign*** every cent is going towards this ambitious project, and is greatly appreciated by Eve and her team. If you can't contribute, share it with friends! please and thank you. (the campaign ends July 1; Eve is going to barf from gratitude and humility.)
SURPRISE!
With Don Anderson and Lily Wood, Eve invited guests in their audience to participate in making a podcast together! Extra special thanks to all the brave vulnerable people who shared their stories with the room, and now the world.
Untangling Our Roots, in partership with NAAP (National Association of Adoptees and Parents) was held in Denver, Colorado this year. the NEXT Untangling Our Roots will in in Atlanta Georgia in 2026. I hope you'll be there with me! (me is Eve)
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Moses Farrow works as an an adoption trauma educator, adoption activist, and licensed marriage and family therapist. He explains to Eve how and why he wants to raise the alarm about crimes being committed against adopted children. *CONTENT WARNING*
Virtual Town Hall March 10: register at AdopteeMurders.eventbrite.com
Moses and Eve discuss the following cases:
For More In-depth Exploration and Education about the Adoption Industry, Moses provided the following links:
To contact Moses Farrow:
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Original publish date: October 24, 2023.
Hi, Eve here. The goal of this episode was twofold: to finally tell my own DNA-discovery story, and to talk about season 6 and all the plans we have for 2024. I think I did an okay job, but I suspect you'll still be hungry for more details about my personal DNA-discovery. As Joy my editor put it, "the real details are for the book!" But I tried! I really did.
I want to clarify now: the podcast is NOT over. Season 5 is finished so I can enjoy the holidays and recalibrate how to use my resources wisely as we move forward. I really hope you will all come along with me as Everything's Relative evolves. Thank you, as always, for your support and friendship. xo Eve
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Peggie Arvidson, host of the podcast Adoptees At Work , talks about what adoption means to her identity, and what inspired this new project exploring the careers and dreams of adoptees.
Folllow Peggie's Substack: ZenCareer Nation
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Rob talks about what the past year has been like for him since discovering that the daughter he's raising, who is still a young child, isn't biologically related to him.
ORIGINAL PUBLISH DATE: 10/06/23
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Abby Hasberry of instagram account @D.E.A.R._Abby talks with Eve about coming into the adoption conversation with two penultimate experiences: she is a transracial domestic adoptee, and as a teenager she became a birth mother who relinquished a son.
ORIGINAL PUBLISH DATE: 10/09/23
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The oldest of 4 girls, Amy Jo talks about the relief, heartbreak, and fury of her DNA Discovery.
original publish date: 09/22/23
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episode 100!!!!
Eve spends some time with Jack "Paul" Fronczak, who was the subject of CNN's recent documentary The Lost Sons, as well as the co-writer of The Foundling, and True Identity . TW: traumatic events, abuse
For more information about the case, and to contact Jack Fronczak: www.fronczakfiles.com
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Michelle talks about her upscale Atlanta upbringing, her mother's anxiety, and what kind of truths unfolded before her when she took a mail-in DNA Test. (episode 99 of 100)
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Sheridan comes at her own DNA Discovery experience as a therapist who uses Dialectical Behavior Therapy with her clients. Sheridan is a licensed therapist in Minnesota.
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Jennie talks about the secrets her family was hiding about donor conception. Subscribe and read Jennie's substack* about her journey here.
*A Substack is kind of like a blend of a newsletter and a blog!
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Rebecca Berg of No Strings Nutrition in Los Angeles California, talks about how coming out of the adoption fog has informed her work as a licensed dietician.
Find Rebecca on instagram @no.strings.nutrition
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CORRECTIONS CORNER: Rebecca states in this episode that her biological mother did not complete a high school education. This is incorrect; Rebecca feels badly for the misstep, and reiterated to Eve that her bio-mom is a successful and driven woman.
Kristin talks about how isolated she feels, even within the Misattributed Parental Event community because of the strife she's experienced from her DNA discovery.
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Meg Thomas, host of Emotional Expedition Podcast, talks with Eve about learning she was a Donor Conceived Person, which has had a major impact on her personal fertility journey and her work as a fertility coach.
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Jill, AKA Margo Reilly, talks about how her mom was telling the truth all those years ago. Jill is the author of When The Apple Falls Far From The Tree, and is now working on a second memoir that focuses on her DNA Discovery. She works as an empowerment coach; find more about her at www.justbeingjill.com
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Rebecca Autumn Sansom, relinquished at birth for adoption, created the powerful documentary, Reckoning With The Primal Woundabout reunion with her own birth mother, and an exploration of the seminal adoption book The Primal Wound, by Nancy Verrier.
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NOTE: the wikipedia page of another former sheriff of Las Vegas, Ralph Lamb, uses this episode to incorrectly report that Caroline is his daughter. She does not claim be related to the Lamb family in any way, nor am I suggesting this by categorizing her biological father as "the man who ran Las Vegas."
***
Caroline talks with Eve about her DNA surprise, The Stardust Casino in Las Vegas, and reconciling her family narrative with scientific proof.
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Freya Lyon finds herself a rare bird: she is a Donor Conceived Person who has also used Donor Conception to create her own family. She is finding her voice as a "dual citizen," and offers insight from her own experiences through various channels in the community.
Follow her on instagram: @unicornDCP
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Ivan is a longtime listener of ERWES, and is ready to tell his side of the story as a BCF (birth-certificate father) to an NPE.
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Lezlee Liljenberg is a firecracker storyteller in Dallas Texas who started investigating when her dad kept saying "If you only knew what your mother has done." She's blogged about her journey at iamlezlee.com
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Genealogist Cairelle Crow is the first person Eve has ever talked to who offered an alternative to the strictly scientific way of looking at our family tree. The Magic In Your Genes, Your Personal Path to Ancestor Work (Bringing Together the Science of DNA with the Timeless Power of Ritual and Spellcraft) is available now on Amazon.
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Kiara Rae Schuh talks with Eve about about her DNA Discovery journey, learning that not everyone feels the same way about being donor conceived, and navigating a plethora of new relationship dynamics. For more information, visit https://www.kiararaeschuh.com , and to buy her book at Amazon, link here.
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Note: Read more about Dr. Morris Wortman, and his unexpected death here.
Blogger and advocate David Berry talks about his DNA Discovery as a Donor Conceived Person, and the way he was thrust into the world of Fertility Fraud. Like Eve Wiley, David Berry is hoping for the passage of HR 451, a federal law designed to protect families from Fertility Fraud.
To contact your own congress member about issues affecting the MPE Community, including HR 451, visit this link here.
To learn more about David Berry, check out his blog! https://berrychronicles.com/
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Emma Stevens discusses her identity as an adoptee, and her journey to find her relatives and the truth. To buy The Gathering Place, about Emma's adoption journey, follow this link here.
For a copy of A Fire Is Coming, click this link here.
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Fred Nicora was just minding his own business at a family BBQ one minute, and experiencing the annihilation of his identity the next minute. His DNA discovery is what we call "LDA," Late-Discovery Adoption. His journey is one that many in the community of Misattributed Parentage will relate to. Go to frednicora.com to order Fred's book, Forbidden Roots: A Memoir of Late-Discovery Adoption.
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Annette Becklund and Eve explore her NPE DNA Discovery, how she came to write a book, and how it's affected her role as a licensed therapist. Buy Anette's Book here.
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Tonnocus McClain is still navigating the awkward and difficult world of meeting new family after his DNA test results confirmed what he already suspected: Kenny is not his biological father.
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Double-NPEs; the fastest growing subset of our fast growing community. DNA Discoveries that prove one non-parental event isn't enough.
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Eve Wiley has become a prolific advocate for fertility legislation ever since her DNA Discovery revealed she was born of her mom's fertility doctor's sperm, and NOT the specimen from whom they picked on a list from California Cryobank. See a news clip here.
Find your congressperson and write them an email about FERTILITY FRAUD LEGISLATION BILL HR 451.
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Carlyn Montes De Oca, author of Junkyard Girl, A Memoir of Ancestry, Family Secrets, and Second Chances talks about what it's like to have a DNA Discovery like her's, including realizations about late-discovery adoption and her own identity as a Mexican American woman.
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Linda tells Eve about her DNA discovery and the ways our intuition speaks to us in mysterious ways; what does it mean when everyone in the family knew your DNA truth except for you?
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Steven's DNA Discovery journey has been clunky and full of self-discovery, including a conversion to Judaism and a newfound understanding of who his mom and dad were as people and as parents.
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Nick's DNA Surprise was delivered by his mother without much fanfare despite the obviously wild information. He created a graphic novella about his journey, a must-have for anyone building their DNA-Discovery/Misattributed Parental Event library. To order a $5 copy of "Someone To Watch Over Me," visit http://nijomu.com/books/someone-to-watch-over-me/
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Jill started it all because she had always known she was donor-conceived. She managed to wrangle 4 of her half-siblings AND THEIR GRANDMOTHER into a call with Eve. Please listen to this season finale; it's a really special one.
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T.J. Raphael, journalist and podcast producer, talks about the arduous, FIVE YEAR process it took to create "Biohacked: Family Secrets," the podcast series which chronicles and researches the donor conception industry.
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Chrysta Bilton, author of Normal Family; On Truth, Love, and How I Met My 35 Siblings, talks with Eve about her journey to writing her memoir.
BOOK CLUB ZOOM PARTY WITH CHRYSTA OCTOBER 2ND 5PM 2022! for zoom invite, contact Eve!
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Don Anderson (of Missing Pieces: NPE Life Podcast) invited his new half-sister Tammi to tell their story.
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A follow-up episode to Jennifer's DNA-discovery that she explores on "DNA Surprises With Alexis Hourselt Podcast." Eve and Jennifer have a lovely time developing a friendship and connecting about their NPE journeys. Jennifer is the host of "Unfinished Truths," a podcast that explores various perspectives of the DNA Discovery world.
Listen to DNA Surprises with Alexis Hourselt
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Cassandra was totally shocked to discover her Ashkenazi Judaic heritage, and that her parent's used a sperm donor. Now she helps other donor-conceived people process their own discoveries, and helps to educate parents on how to navigate the conversation with their own DC children.
Groups Cassandra talks about:
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Tiffany would have loved to know the truth of her medical history before all the extra colonoscopies. Now she's advocating for the rights of all donor-conceived people.
U.S. Donor Conceived Council: https://www.usdcc.org/
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Kathleen talks about her LDA (Late-Discovery Adoptee) and updates us about what has happened since she told her story to Lily Wood on NPE Storiesin early 2021. A "Cross-over" episode with Lily Wood, we suggest listening to her episode first if you want all the details of Kathleen's original tale!
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Alexis asks the better questions. :)
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Holiday Episode! If you're interested in winning a signed copy of both our books, Who Even Am I Anymore created by Eve Sturges, and Folksong by Cory Goodrich head over to our instagram accounts for more info!
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Jodi tells Eve all about finding her place with Scottish Ancestors and what NOT to do as an NPE (hint: knock on the door.)
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Maryll and Culley have been friends for over 20 years; they both were contacted by siblings at the same time, and found out things about their dads they never knew. They sit with Eve for Father's Day weekend to explore the experience of what it's like to be on the other side of an NPE-experience, when strangers reach out because they share the same dad.
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Melissa comes to Eve from Donor Conceived Community Support to talk about her own journey as a Donor Conceived Person and using her experience and skills to help others on a larger scale.
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This episode is back to basics; a guest talks about the raw emotional journey of her NPE Discovery and how it's changed her life over the past year.
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Kelly Grace from DNAngels search group talks about how her NPE discovery led to an entire organization that helps people find the missing puzzle pieces of their family tree.
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Author of the book NPE: A Story Guide For Unexpected DNA Discoveries Leanne R. Hay talks about her own NPE surprise and how she decided to create the resource we've all been waiting for.
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Founder and editor of Severance Magazine Kate Jackson imagined a lot of things about the mother she never knew; what she discovered changed her whole understanding of the MPE experience. Now, her magazine is a treasured resource for the entire MPE community.
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Therapist Jill Copeland focuses on the way family experiences are passed down through generations, and searches for her father's family.
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Peter Boni's spent 20 years trying to understand himself and the history of donor conception; he uncovered a billion dollar industry and wrote the best-selling book Uprooted: Family Trauma, Unknown Origins and the Secretive History of Artificial Insemination in the process.
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Krista thought ancestry was alll fun and games until she realized the NPE wasn't her...it was her mom.
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Ryan comes from Scottland as a Late-Discovery Adoptee; sharing his story is a part of processing the pain this experience has caused.
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Eve talks with We Are Donor Conceived's founder Erin Jackson about what inspired her to create a online space, and now a gorgeous magazine, for her community.
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Matt could never understand why he felt out of place; a mail-in DNA kit offered answers, but this former police officer was unprepared for the truth.
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Heidy Marble is a domestic adoptee working on a book, a podcast, and a documentary about adoption trauma.
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Four women, four time zones, four dedicated search angels. Have questions about your family tree? These women have answers.
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Sandy was determined to survive and get to the bottom of her father's identity. TRIGGER WARNING: child abuse, sexual abuse, violence.
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A special conversation with founders Alesia Weis and Kara Rubenstien Deyerin of the Right To Know organization and all they're doing for the MPE community.
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Tobie talks about pain and healing in this special episode that explores the complexities of family secrets. TRIGGER WARNING: sexual abuse, physical abuse, incest.
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Kimberly shares her story from the other side of the MPE experience: why she lied about the paternity of her own daughter, and what she wants MPEs to consider about their own mom's and the decisions they made decades ago. Trigger warning: suicide
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Mendy talks about the train that left the station before he could catch his breath, what he would do differently, and why he's always ordering so much pizza.
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Abby joins Eve to tell her story and explore the complicated nature of finding out the truth about where she came from and knowing it's not that unusual. TRIGGER WARNING: rape.
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After hearing Annie's story on Lily Wood's NPE Stories, Eve tries to dig deeper into changed heritage, and gets the recipe for the best Chicken Marsala in the Bronx.
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This Fouth of July weekend, learn about our country's sordid history of manipulative and dishonest adoption practices. Eve and author Gabrielle Glaser get to talk all about her new book.
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A crossover episode with Lily Wood's NPE Stories, Eve and Laura explore what it means if DNA results expose dark secrets about people you know and love. TRIGGER WARNING: rape, sexual assault and related topics are discussed in this episode.
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Eve and Dawn talk about how her own experience as an NPE led her to help others as a search angel and geneologist with a specific interest in unknown fathers.
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Julie Dixon Jackson takes on Eve's ancestry DNA results and they both tailspin into the existential crises of identity and history.
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The founder of Hiraeth Hope & Healing retreat weekends shares her own story and how she feels called to help other NPEs.
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Brad Ewell, a police officer in Texas, talks about what being a Late Discovery Adoptee means to him and how's he's weathered the surprise so far.
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Daylynn teaches Eve a new concept about how related a set of cousins can really be.
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Dani Shapiro was already a renowned author of memoirs and novels when it happened to her: a recreational DNA test turned her world upside down. Eve talks with her about the journey that led to her latest best-selling book, "Inheritance."
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Fred Firestine loves compiling data as a way to understand his story; Eve struggles to understand the details!
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Dr. Gina Daniel is a pioneer in the study of the NPE experience. Eve tracked her down while she was wrapping up her dissertation.
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Eve interviews Cory Goodrich, author of Folksong: A Ballad of Death, Discovery and DNA.
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So excited to announce Season 3 will be coming soon this Spring!
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Eve interviews Lesli Johnson, a therapist in Pasadena California who specializes in treating the adoption community.
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Eve and Lily Wood , host of the podcast NPE Stories, share stories and become best friends forever.
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Jessica Stavena talks about what it means to be "donor decieved," and the growing community of people demanding accountability and change in the fertility industry.
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Libby Copeland wrote the "NPE bible" of 2020; Eve asks the writer about how this process opened her eyes to the world of DNA Discoveries.
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Eve talks with Mr. DiGangi about searching for his mother, and discovering that she lived a much more adventurous life than he could have imagined.
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Writer Melissa Stephenson talks with Eve about discovering she has another brother after the death of who she thought was her only sibling.
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Horseshoes, yard sales, and....DNA tests.
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He is his father's son.
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Becky is not ashamed to be the product of infidelity; Eve is inspired by her confidence and truth.
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Eve addresses the call-in talkshow host, Dr. Laura Schlessinger, and the way she treated an NPE asking for advice on her own podcast, "call of the day." Spoiler alert: Dr. Laura is a total wretch. With guests, B.K. Jackson, Julie Dixon Jackson (Cutoff Genes Podcast), and Krista Driver
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Eve talks with Diahan, founder of Your DNA Guide, about helping people uncover their family heritage, but also sometimes their family secrets.
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DNA is our history. Our history is political.
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Tracing the ancestry of Native Americans can be complicated.
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Mikkel's eyes are bright crystal green. That should've been all anyone needed to know.
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Spencer tells his story of surprises but reflects on the broader issues of the African American experience in the DNA phenomenon.
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Eve launches a trailer in the middle of the Covid-19 pandemic; good idea? Bad idea? You decide.
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FINAL EPISODE, SEASON 1: Eve and Julie meet in the middle to interview each other about their personal stories, what DNA testing has done to their lives, and the role podcasting has played in their discovery.
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A listener generously offers her time to explain how she and her wife are choosing to develop their family. Eve asks a lot of questions; her mind is blown.
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Randi doesn't really believe her mom's late confession, but doing a mail-in DNA kit proves that it wasn't just dementia.
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Aaron worked in the archives and offers a lot to think about the people who are interested in their heritage, and how the mail-in DNA kits are changing that landscape--especially for women and people of color.
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Mesa's life wouldn't be the same without the bond between her and her siblings; her story is about a DNA shock, but it's really about love being stronger than family dysfunction.
TRIGGER WARNING: abuse
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What does it mean if your father was not a tall and dark med student, but was actually a slender redheaded Broadway dancer?
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Barbara's story is a poignant testimony about the way that a DNA discovery can trigger more than just confusion. (Please note: Eve calls this "episode 6," but she's wrong about that.)
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Discount Code Magic Mind Focus Energy Drink! https://www.magicmind.com/EVERYTHINGEVE20 (Affiliate Sponsorship)
As an adoptee, Krista's been putting the pieces together for a long time. Then they all fall apart again. (Also: group counseling resources in Orange County!)
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Charlene is trying to find the blessing in her DNA-discovery.
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Dick has zero answers, but he is an awesome example of someone who has a shocking experience but tries to be of service to others instead of wallowing in the stress of it all.
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It's all Debra's fault. (Or is it?)
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Karla never imagined she'd have to think about sperm so much. (Also: Support groups for NPEs, and a note from Eve's 10th grade biology teacher!)
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Angora sweaters and jelly donuts; Laurie W puts all the pieces together. (Definition of "NPE" explained!)
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Lori KNEW her brown eyes weren't just an anomaly , so her big feet must have come from somewhere too!
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Amy isn't even the sister they're looking for, and she kind of wishes they'd give her a minute to catch her breath.
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Ancestry.com told this Mexican-American he was actually >20% Middle-Eastern. Figuring it out reveals the truth, but also heartbreak. MAY 2019
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