Enlightened By Dogs: Living with Cooperation, Not Obedience

Latest Episodes:

EBD078 How to Calm Down After Over-Arousal Nov 11, 2019

Show notes

Do you or your dog ever get over aroused or excited and kind of lose your mind? I bet you do! Everyone experiences overarousal to some degree, and in today's episode of Enlightened By Dogs, Kathy breaks down how to calm down after being overwhelmed or over aroused! Regardless of who gets over aroused first, you or your dog, the protocol that Kathy shares will help you get back to being safe, calm and happy together in no time! You may not be aware that your dog looks to you for loving leadership, and follows your cues when situations come up, so if your dog is freaking out, it may be because secretly, you are too! Mastering your own reactions in times of distress can make a significant impact on how long it takes for you and your dog to come back down to earth after being overwhelmed, but that's easier said than done. With Kathy's Get Back to Grazing protocol, she gives you the tools to be a great leader to your dog by living and modeling the exact reactions you'd love to see! Not sure how to get the job done? Click play and learn an amazing new way to calm your four legged friends!

Being prepared for what to do in the aftermath of over arousal is key!
What is a gratitude resent and how does it work to aid in recovering ourselves from over arousal.
Our dogs pick up on our internal and external drama!
What is the "Get Back to Grazing" Protocol?
The step by step process taking you from overwhelmed, to the calm and safe feeling of getting "back to grazing"

"There's not value in not being prepared"

"We as humans have a tendency to over dramatize things"

"The gratitude reset can really help us break that habit of thought looping"

"Our dogs are so attuned to us"

"Generate feelings of contentment and love within your heart"

"We're trying to spread partnership ripples"

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EBD077 I Choose Gratitude! Nov 04, 2019

Show notes

Do you have a regular ritualized gratitude practice in your everyday ordinary life? Using intentional gratitude can not only change your dog's behavior, but can significantly advance your partnership lifestyle! If you get stuck in endless loops of negative feelings and emotions, or if you sometimes feel like you take things in your life for granted, this episode has the antidote! From spiritual laws that govern us as people to a small but significant activity that you can work into your daily life, Kathy shares her perspectives and practices in order to show you the practical side of such a powerful force! Being grateful works in an almost magical way, and Kathy is here in this week's episode of Enlightened By Dogs to help you conjure up a little gratitude magic of your own!

Why not having an intentional gratitude practice in your life feels like you're missing out on magic!
Are you feeling, showing and expressing your gratitude, or are you simply taking things for granted?
Do you have a tendency to think about the things in your life that are going wrong in an endless loop?
What is the law of resonance, and why are we walking around like big magnets, attracting things and situations to our lives?
What happens when we feel a genuine gratitude for the things we have?
A quick guide to show you how to get started with your daily gratitude practice!

"People who are grateful tend to be happier, healthier and more fulfilled in their life"

"Being grateful can help people cope with stress"

"Gratitude is shown to be good for us and for those around us"

"We have a natural tendency to focus on what goes wrong in our daily lives"

"It feels amazing when we take the time to count our blessings"

"We're infecting others with our love and gratitude"

"Find the joy in your life"

"Your gratitude has no expiration date"

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EBD076 Why An Invitation vs A Trained Cue? Oct 28, 2019

Show notes

What is an invitation as it relates to us and our dogs? What defines an invite? How does inviting your dog to engage with you differ from giving a trained cue, and why does it matter so much? These are just some of the questions that surface during Kathy's weekend long Brilliant Partners Live Workshop. Since they were such good questions, and inspire deep thought, Kathy decided to share her thoughts and responses with you on this episode of Enlightened By Dogs! A Brilliant Partner's goal is to live a lifestyle dripping with fun, respect, connection and love, so find out how to get the love lava flowing, and create true connectivity with your furry friend! Click play and learn all about the differences between a loving invitation, and a trained cue, and why one is definitely more effective than the other!

How does an invitation open the pathway to connection?
What does a cue sound like?
Why are we extending an invitation in the first place?
What is love lava, and how do we get it flowing?
What does an invitation look like, and how do we extend one?

"By itself, the very act of inviting opens the pathway to connection"

"As social animals, we have a very strong and hard wired need to feel like we belong"

"Extending an invitation to our dog fulfills that deep social need"

"Our personal space certainly extends way beyond our physical body and so does our dogs"

"Intention is a big part of what we do and how we live"

Episodes Mentioned in the show!

Episode 73 Giving your dog the freedom to say no

https://www.enlightenedbydogs.com/ebd-073-giving-dogs-freedom-to-say-no/

Episode 55 The Science of Safety with Sue Mimm

https://www.enlightenedbydogs.com/ebd-055-science-of-safety/

Episode 56 The Arousal Protocol for Dogs

https://www.enlightenedbydogs.com/ebd-056-arousal-protocol-for-dogs/

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EBD075 How We Disrupt Heart Connections with Our Dogs Oct 21, 2019

Show notes

Do you know what stands in the way of you forming a heart connection with your dog? Have you been trying to connect on a deeper level with your friend, but things seem to be getting in the way? It's such a core piece of what makes a relationship and friendship so strong, and yet so many of us struggle, and sometimes aren't even aware of it! Having a genuine heart to heart connection and bond with our dogs is what both sides truly want, and Kathy is here to share 3 things that may be stopping you from reaching your ultimate happy place with your dog! Are you falling into any of these traps? Tune in and find out if you are, and how to get back on track to creating an amazing partnership to be proud of!

What stands is the way of you having a heart to heart connection with your dog?
Are you being present and in the moment?
Are you worried about getting it wrong?
Are you letting your dog give you breaks from the hamster wheel of life?
Are you being sucked into the drama?
The REAL reason we get dogs, and how to ensure we're living up to our full potential as partners!

"What stands is the way of us having a heart to heart connection with our dog?"

"If we're afraid of making a mistake or getting it wrong, well that means that we're literally building a wall between us and our dog"

"We're role modeling for our doh the very thing that we don't want our dogs to mirror"

"What my dog most needs is a heart connection"

"Breathe through that little bit of discomfort you're going to feel when you decide to change things"

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EBD074 Common Mistakes with The Dance Invitation Oct 14, 2019

Show notes

Do you know about the dance invitation? Do you know how to invite your dogs to dance? How do you know if you're doing it properly, and if you're getting it right, why won't your dogs join you? In last week's episode: Giving Our Dogs the Opportunity to Say No, Kathy introduced us to the concept of Connect, Observe, Decide, and how to create opportunities to give our dogs choices. Today, Kathy is furthering our education on the topic by sharing issues that can arise and common mistakes people make when first trying to invite their dogs to dance. She's giving us the most common mishaps, and how to avoid falling into the same traps that other people do when trying to build a genuine connection and partnership with their dogs! Kathy's making sure that we don't repeat history by misusing the dance invitation, or expecting it to be something that it truly isn't meant to be. Not sure how to create that meaningful connection? Click play!

Mistake #1: Using the dance invitation as if it's a recall and expecting compliance.
Mistake #2: Using the dance invitation as if it's a training exercise.
Mistake #3: Loving the end of the dance invitation but not loving the other parts.
Bonus Mistakes: Communication blunders that can mess the whole thing up!

"It doesn't have to be a one or all type of thing"

"We are inviting our dogs to connect, we are extending an invitation to make a connection. A heart to heart connection."

"We're not expecting compliance"

"There's at least some part of our brains that are connected and our hearts that are connected to one another. We can strengthen that"

"We all love the connection and so we do it"

Check out Episode #73

https://www.enlightenedbydogs.com/ebd-073-giving-dogs-freedom-to-say-no/

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EBD073 Giving Our Dogs Freedom to Say No Oct 07, 2019

Show notes

Do you give your dog the freedom to say no to you? In a world where having a well trained, obedient dog is touted like a medal of honor, it may seem weird to entertain the idea of giving our dog the option to say no to us. In this week's episode of Enlightened By Dogs, Kathy will be sharing why we might want to start, and the massive impact it can have on our relationship with our dogs! Would you give your dog the option to say no to trivial things if it means getting your way with more important things? If the answer is yes, then click play and tune in as Kathy breaks down the idea of relinquishing your need to have it your way, in order to create a strong partnership with your dog. What do partners do? They respect each other! Which means that when you need something from your dog, they're far more likely to do it for a partner that they love and respect, instead of someone who just bullies them and pushes them around! Listen in as Kathy shares detailed examples from her day to day life, in order to demonstrate the concept in action! This episode will change the way you approach every situation with your dog!

You can have an attentive, responsive and responsible dog without putting them through obedience training.
What impact does the freedom lifestyle have on our dog's willingness to say yes?
Before the how and the what, you need to ask yourself why. Why do you want this?
Connect, Observe, Decide.
Body language is key in effectively practicing congruent communication with your dog!
More examples of giving your dogs the freedom to choose!

"The more opportunities I give my dogs to say no, the more likely they are to say yes when it's really important"

"My badge of honor is that my dogs choose to be attentive and responsive and responsible"

"Why do I want this thing that I'm asking, or do I?"

"I'm going to be in alignment with my communication"

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EBD072 3 Dog Socialization Mistakes You Must Avoid Sep 30, 2019

Show notes

How do you socialize your dog? Are you the type to force your friend to face their fears? What about bringing them into crowded dog parks to expose them to other dogs? Have you been wishing for a better way to socialize? One that actually works and doesn't stress out your dog or break their trust? Today on Enlightened By Dogs, Kathy is busting through 3 socialization myths that leave you and your dog in worse shape than when you started! Tune in and learn why these socialization methods are so damaging, and how avoiding them at all costs will lead to a much stronger bond with your four legged family members! Worried you might be doing one of these things? Then it's time to click play, and find out! If you're not, then great! But if you are, now is your chance to stop what you're doing, learn a better way, and begin building a deep, trusting connection with your dog!

In This Episode

Why do we go about socializing our dogs in all.
Myth #1: Exposure is not positive socialization.
When do we need to take extra care of the experiences our dogs have?
Myth #2: Flooding is not positive socialization.
How do you build trust, confidence and resiliency within you and your dog?
Pressure to conform is not positive socialization.

"Socialization should consist of introducing your dog, in a controlled mindful way, to a variety of new circumstances"

"Exposure is not positive socialization"

"We want to give our dogs the freedom to choose"

"Honour each dog as unique and beautiful"

"Let's not force them into compromising positions where they're not feeling safe, calm and happy"

"Positive and proper socialization means that we honour our dogs"

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EBD071 Responsible Role Modeling for a Brilliant Partnership Lifestyle Sep 23, 2019

Show notes

What is responsible role-modeling and what does that look like? Why does it matter? How does it positively impact your relationship with your dogs? These are questions you may not feel the need to ask, but as they say: we don't know what we don't know! In this episode, Kathy is giving you one of the most powerful tools to put in your toolbox to ensure that you're loved and respected enough to be listened to by your furry friends! After all, Monkey see, Monkey do. A lot of what our dogs do mimics our behaviour perfectly, but without knowing we're guilty of the same behaviors, we often try to correct our dogs without first correcting ourselves! Want to know how to spot which behaviours to correct? Want to know how your dogs look up to you for guidance? Tune in to this week's episode of Enlightened By Dogs and put your best foot forward so that your dogs can do the same!

How do you keep a pack of Border Collies happy when they can't go outside because of landscaping and construction?
What does responsible role-modeling look like?
Why did Kathy stop looking at the sky?
There is huge power and harmony to be found in meeting our dogs' social needs.
Tips to help you practice responsible role-modeling effectively!

"I'm role modeling, and what I mean by that is Iam not acknowledging that there's anything happening"

"I'm just carrying on with my normal stuff as I always do"

"They look to me for guidance"

"We're literally expressing with all of us, congruently"

"It has nothing to do with us, it's none of our concern, it's just life as usual"

"Life is one big experiment"

"I am a role model"

"Dogs easily mirror our behaviour"

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EBD070 Perspective Shifts Necessary for a Partnership Sep 16, 2019

Show notes

Being a Brilliant Partner to your dog takes a shift in perspective. In fact, it takes multiple shifts in your mindset to become the best partner you could possibly be! But what are these shifts? How do you identify them? What can you do to begin reframing your dog's needs, wants and behaviours? In this week's episode of Enlightened By Dogs, Kathy is sharing the 10 perspective shifts you'll want to experience in order to truly show up for your dog! What does that mean? Often times, how we think of something creates our feelings and reality, so by changing the way we think about things, and adjusting our mindset, we can create huge impact in our lives! You don't even NEED to do them all to begin seeing results! Even just taking one of these shifts, and using it on a daily basis will show massive improvements in how you think, and how your life changes as a result of that!

Recognizing the Brilliant Partnership Ambassadors!
The cornerstones of a loving partnership.
10 mindset shifts that will massively impact your relationship with your dog!
Why wait for someday?

"Those deep seeded beliefs influence our thinking"

"If we can think about things differently and if we can shift our perspective, we are opening doors to brilliance"

"Move into coexistence with your dog with the intention of inviting partnership"

"How can we rewrite our story into a beautiful love story"

"We can have happiness, freedom and joy right now. Today."

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EBD069 Restoring Family Harmony with 3 Rescue Dogs with Bettina Nowicki Sep 09, 2019

Show notes

Imagine adopting 2 Great Pyrenees dogs and having them join your family. Everything is going well, and everyone is getting along. Then one day, you decide to take in a deaf dog, and give him a chance at a great life with your loved ones. It starts going down hill. The new dog is stressed out, frustrated, and you can't communicate with him. Your other dogs are feeling out of sorts. The new dog starts to destroy the house, and fight with the other male dog in your house. You have to start boarding off rooms and keeping everyone separated. Sound a little like a nightmare? Well that was Bettina Nowicki'a life when she adopted Murphy!! Murphy is not a bad dog, but when he came into a new place, with strange new people and dogs, he didn't adjust very well. Everything seemed hopeless until Bettina met Kathy and stumbled upon the winning formula! Murphy began to improve within days of making small "baby step" changes, and now Murphy is a full fledged and loved member of her family! The other dogs even lie with him and play with him! It's become like night and day in Bettina's house, and Kathy's Brilliant Partners played a small role in making it happen! Want to know how it transpired? Tune in to this episode of Enlightened By Dogs!

Adopting Murphy into the family
Was Murphy a lost cause? Would he need to be sent to a new home?
How the family was able to come together as a unit and embrace a new way of living!
Learning how to communicate with a dog who is deaf, and things that Bettina had never even considered!
How Brilliant Partners differ from dog training programs.

"I think the dogs were taking over the leadership because we didn't know what to do"

"We can drive them again! We can walk them again!"

"We weren't even able to have them in the same room together, they are now lying on the couch together, they're playing outside together"

"Our dogs don't bark at the neighbors anymore"

"I never knew how to communicate with my dogs until I met you"

Register for Kathy's Free Partnership Workshop…Transform Your Rocky Relationship with Your Dog into A Brilliant Partnership!

http://dancinghearts.link/bpaworkshop

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