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    Society & Culture

    Dyking Out – a Lesbian and LGBTQIA Podcast for Everyone!

    Hosted by New York City-based comedians Carolyn Bergier & Melody Kamali, Dyking Out is a podcast about lesbian / queer life, news, and pop culture. Each week, Carolyn and Melody invite a special guest (comedians, musicians, actors, crushes) to dyke out with them about a topic that’s relevant to the LGBTQIA world. But really, it’s just another way to advance the gay agenda.

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    Latest Episodes:
    "I Check a Lot of Boxes" w/ Brittani Nichols (Re-release) Jun 29, 2023

    We support the writer's strike! Check out this recent article featuring Brittani about why queer folks should support the strike: https://www.out.com/gay-tv-shows/wga-brittani-nichols-writers-strike

    33:36:31

    As a reminder, you can listen to past Dyking Off Topic episodes with Carolyn and Melody on our Patreon for $5/month.

    Sponsored by BetterHelp Online Therapy: As a listener, you’ll get 10% off your first month by visiting our sponsor at betterhelp.com/do

    Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    "New Queer Face of 9/11" w/ Emily Dayton Evans (Re-release) Jun 01, 2023

    Some of us truly live for the applause, and this week's guest will not shy away from that fact. Comedian and performer Emily Dayton Evans joins us to talk about her journey from fragile human to saliva-swapping comedian. Did you know it was possible to grown up in Vermont without a driver's license? Are walkie talkies a couples' gift or intended for one person only? What's the hot goss with age gap relationships on TikTok? We cover all this and so much more.

    As a reminder, you can listen to past Dyking Off Topic episodes with Carolyn and Melody on our Patreon for $5/month.

    Sponsored by BetterHelp Online Therapy: As a listener, you’ll get 10% off your first month by visiting our sponsor at betterhelp.com/do

    Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    Quick updates / Jen Tullock on the "You Might Know Her From" podcast May 17, 2023

    Listen to Liz Glazer's comedy album A Very Particular Experience

    Enjoy this episode of a FANTASTIC podcast, You Might Know Her From with Anne Rodeman and Damien Bellino featuring an interview with actress Jen Tullock (Interview starts at 14:56)

    As a reminder, you can listen to past Dyking Off Topic episodes with Carolyn and Melody on our Patreon for $5/month.

    Sponsored by BetterHelp Online Therapy: As a listener, you’ll get 10% off your first month by visiting our sponsor at betterhelp.com/do

    Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    Love's A Pitch w/ Phil Corin May 03, 2023

    Phil Corin's ep of Love's A Pitch.

    As a reminder, you can listen to past Dyking Off Topic episodes with Carolyn and Melody on our Patreon for $5/month.

    Sponsored by BetterHelp Online Therapy: As a listener, you’ll get 10% off your first month by visiting our sponsor at betterhelp.com/do

    Sponsored by Nutrafol: Get free shipping on every order and $15 off at Nutrafol.com with promo code "DO"

    Sponsored by Kikoff: Kikoff.com to get started!

    Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    "Getting 'Bravo Dyke' Out There" w/ Kayla Kumari Upadhyaya (Re-release) Apr 19, 2023

    We're makin' it NICE this episode with our fave L-Word reviewer and writer, Kayla Kumari Upadhyaya! But we're not dyking out about Gen Q. We're dissecting the Real Housewives franchise for all the queer and queer-coded content it regularly serves up. These ladies are acting gay AND doing crimes, so what's more queer than that? And they're not just acting gay, some franchises have queer women amongst the cast. Also, we manage to make comparisons to The L Word. We make the case that The Real Housewives is a great show to watch with your significant other. Plus, we give our REAL gayest things from Provincetown. And we learn straight people will see what they want to see when reading your gay t-shirt. Finally, we end on one of our trickiest listener questions yet!

    As a reminder, you can listen to past Dyking Off Topic episodes with Carolyn and Melody on our Patreon for $5/month.

    Sponsored by BetterHelp Online Therapy: As a listener, you’ll get 10% off your first month by visiting our sponsor at betterhelp.com/do

    Sponsored by Nutrafol: Get free shipping on every order and $15 off at Nutrafol.com with promo code "DO"

    Sponsored by Kikoff: Kikoff.com to get started!

    Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    "Being Present With Birds" w/ Grace Bonney (Re-release) Apr 12, 2023

    The bird's the word on this episode with author and blogger Grace Bonney. Grace's love of watching birds is queer and contagious. So what's the big deal about birding anyway? How can it positively affect your mental health? What's the community like? Why does it feel so queer? Which birds seem most sapphic? Are all pigeons elder queers? We answer all these questions and nerd out about so much more. Plus, we also talk about Grace's latest book, Collective Wisdom, and what they learned in the process of writing it. Also, find out if the omicron variant hindered Carolyn and Melody's gayness this week. Finally, we strap in for a listener question about strap-on etiquette.


    As a reminder, you can listen to past Dyking Off Topic episodes with Carolyn and Melody on our Patreon for $5/month.

    Sponsored by BetterHelp Online Therapy: As a listener, you’ll get 10% off your first month by visiting our sponsor at betterhelp.com/do

    Sponsored by Nutrafol: Get free shipping on every order and $15 off at Nutrafol.com with promo code "DO"

    Sponsored by Kikoff: Kikoff.com to get started!

    Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    "Rose-colored Glasses" w/ Rivkah Reyes (Re-release) Mar 21, 2023

    Might as well face it you're addicted to (things that actually aren't but can sometimes trick you into thinking it's) love! Actor/Musician/Comedian/Writer/Reader Rivkah Reyes joins us to dyke out about their recovery and journey to being spiritually healthy.

    Listen to Carolyn's new podcast Love's A Pitch on Spotify or Apple Podcasts.

    As a reminder, you can listen to past Dyking Off Topic episodes with Carolyn and Melody on our Patreon for $5/month.

    Sponsored by BetterHelp Online Therapy: As a listener, you’ll get 10% off your first month by visiting our sponsor at betterhelp.com/do

    Sponsored by Nutrafol: Get free shipping on every order and $15 off at Nutrafol.com with promo code "DO"

    Sponsored by Kikoff: Kikoff.com to get started!

    Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    Love's A Pitch w/ Ruby Quinn (preview) Mar 07, 2023

    Listen to Love's A Pitch on Spotify or Apple Podcasts.

    As a reminder, you can listen to past Dyking Off Topic episodes with Carolyn and Melody on our Patreon for $5/month.

    Sponsored by BetterHelp Online Therapy: As a listener, you’ll get 10% off your first month by visiting our sponsor at betterhelp.com/do

    Sponsored by Nutrafol: Get free shipping on every order and $15 off at Nutrafol.com with promo code "DO"

    Sponsored by Kikoff: Kikoff.com to get started!

    Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    Love's A Pitch w/ Jeena Bloom (preview) Mar 02, 2023

    Listen to Love's A Pitch on Spotify or Apple Podcasts.

    As a reminder, you can listen to past Dyking Off Topic episodes with Carolyn and Melody on our Patreon for $5/month.

    Sponsored by BetterHelp Online Therapy: As a listener, you’ll get 10% off your first month by visiting our sponsor at betterhelp.com/do

    Sponsored by Nutrafol: Get free shipping on every order and $15 off at Nutrafol.com with promo code "DO"

    Sponsored by Kikoff: Kikoff.com to get started!

    Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    Love's A Pitch Ep 2 preview w/ Sheria Mattis Feb 21, 2023

    Listen to Love's A Pitch on Spotify or Apple Podcasts.

    As a reminder, you can listen to past Dyking Off Topic episodes with Carolyn and Melody on our Patreon for $5/month.

    Sponsored by BetterHelp Online Therapy: As a listener, you’ll get 10% off your first month by visiting our sponsor at betterhelp.com/do

    Sponsored by Nutrafol: Get free shipping on every order and $15 off at Nutrafol.com with promo code "DO"

    Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    Love's A Pitch: Trailer Feb 14, 2023

    Listen to Love's A Pitch on Spotify or Apple Podcasts.

    When it comes to making meaningful connections with people in the LGBTQ community, it can be brutal out there. But does it have to be? Love's a Pitch is a show about love, dating, desire, and ultimately, putting yourself out there. Each week, a new guest will pitch themselves to listeners, making their case for why they're a catch and joining the host in a conversation about all things love and dating. If you like what you hear, you can follow up and shoot your shot, or play matchmaker for a friend, or go do something nice for your partner so that they never leave you and you'll never have to put yourself out there like this. Hosted by comedian Carolyn Bergier from the popular Dyking Out and A League of Their Own Recap podcasts, Love's a Pitch is full of laughs, sincerity, and queer longing.

    Think you're a catch? Apply here for a chance to be on the podcast!

    Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    Love's A Pitch is now out! Preview Ep. 1 w/ Karina Strom Feb 14, 2023

    Listen to Love's A Pitch on Spotify or Apple Podcasts.

    As a reminder, you can listen to past Dyking Off Topic episodes with Carolyn and Melody on our Patreon for $5/month.

    Sponsored by BetterHelp Online Therapy: As a listener, you’ll get 10% off your first month by visiting our sponsor at betterhelp.com/do

    Sponsored by Nutrafol: Get free shipping on every order and $15 off at Nutrafol.com with promo code "DO"

    Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    "Too Much Breast Happening" w/ Michelle Badillo (Re-release) Feb 08, 2023

    First, another update from Carolyn! Then, another favorite ep of ours! Listen to Carolyn's new podcast Love's A Pitch on Spotify or Apple Podcasts.

    Breasts, boobs, boobies, knockers, tits, titters, titties, honkers, hooters, melons, jugs, tatas - whatever you call them, we're dyking out about them with the crazy talented and boobacious Michelle Badillo (One Day At A Time, Vida, The Bold Type). Michelle and Melody bond over the trauma and triumphs of having large breasts, while Carolyn struggles to relate to their shared nipple experiences. Whether they're big, small, or in between, are we all doomed to feel like we can't win with them? Or even without them? Plus, we geek out over Michelle's amazing career that's just getting started. And, we reflect on this Jenny Schecter of a year. You'll also find out if your hosts survived the holidays, are how much PDA they forced on their family members. Finally, we wrap it up with the perfect chaotic question to end this chaotic year.

    As a reminder, you can listen to past Dyking Off Topic episodes with Carolyn and Melody on our Patreon for $5/month.

    Sponsored by BetterHelp Online Therapy: As a listener, you’ll get 10% off your first month by visiting our sponsor at betterhelp.com/do

    Sponsored by Nutrafol: Get free shipping on every order and $15 off at Nutrafol.com with promo code "DO"

    Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    "Two Lesbians Can Be Just Friends" w/ Valerie Complex (Re-Release) Feb 03, 2023

    Listen to Carolyn's new podcast Love's A Pitch on Spotify or Apple Podcasts.

    We are THRILLED to be joined by the astute and prolific Valerie Complex to talk about all things Portrait of a Lady On -- Er...Female Gaze. We definitely do not spend half of this episode talking about how much we love a certain sapphic film and instead talk about why it makes a huge difference to treat women as subjects, not objects, on screen. Valerie is a film critic and freelance writer, and also a member of Portrait nation. Oh no, we did it again. We swear that's not all we talk about. There's also much discussion about negative experiences we've had in France, like when Valerie went to Cannes and saw - you guessed it - Portrait of a Lady On Fire. After nerding out about or favorite femme-heavy flicks, we answer an interesting question from a listener who is hung up on a past fling!

    As a reminder, you can listen to past Dyking Off Topic episodes with Carolyn and Melody on our Patreon for $5/month.

    Sponsored by BetterHelp Online Therapy: As a listener, you’ll get 10% off your first month by visiting our sponsor at betterhelp.com/do

    Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    "Doctor Role Play" w/ Ro White (Re-release) Jan 24, 2023

    Listen to Carolyn's new podcast Love's A Pitch on Spotify or Apple Podcasts.

    Let's talk about hand sex, baby! Ro White is the new sex and dating editor at Autostraddle, and they're here to get fist-deep into our topic. Though as we learn, fisting is about fullness, not depth. We dyke out about the benefits of digital stimulation, and the role it plays in queer sex. Period sex? Squirting? Fisting? Masturbation? We're rounding all the bases. Plus, Ro talks about how Autostraddle is truly doing the gay lord's work by bringing the queerest, inclusive content to help you navigate your love life. But first, Carolyn and Melody recap their first L Word watch parties as Henrietta Hudson. And, see if they can top those events for their gayest thing! Plus, we end with a different type of listener question that required a little extra prep. Enjoy, and stay sexy!


    As a reminder, you can listen to past Dyking Off Topic episodes with Carolyn and Melody on our Patreon for $5/month.

    Sponsored by BetterHelp Online Therapy: As a listener, you’ll get 10% off your first month by visiting our sponsor at betterhelp.com/do

    Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    "Hot, Talented, and Funny" w/ Jasmin Savoy and Liv Hewson (Re-release) Jan 17, 2023

    Some more updates from Carolyn, and a re-release of a time-relevant episode:

    We've got a delightful mix of queer joy and cannibalism on the agenda with actors Liv Hewson and Jasmin Savoy (Yellowjackets on Showtime). First, we get all of our fangirling out of the way by asking about our favorite new show, as well as Scream, Santa Clarita Diet, and other projects these two talents have under their very gay belts. Then, we talk about their new podcast (Most Presents: The Homo Schedule) and what it means to spread queer joy. Also, we feel inspired to take a cue from our guests and bring a game into the ep, so get ready to play Gay Or Straight Agenda along with us! Finally, we end with a question from a listener who feels like they're out of love luck. Just in time for Valentine's Day.

    As a reminder, you can listen to past Dyking Off Topic episodes with Carolyn and Melody on our Patreon for $5/month.

    Sponsored by BetterHelp Online Therapy: As a listener, you’ll get 10% off your first month by visiting our sponsor at betterhelp.com/do

    Sponsored by Nutrafol: Get free shipping on every order and $15 off at Nutrafol.com with promo code "DO"

    Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    New announcements, plus Jess Rothschild interviews Ilene Chaiken Jan 10, 2023

    Listen to Carolyn's new podcast Love's A Pitch on Spotify or Apple Podcasts.

    Happy New Year! We've got a couple of updates and announcements from Carolyn, plus, we're sharing an episode that many of you will be interested in from friend of the pod Jess Rothschild.

    On this episode of Hot Takes and Deep Dives, Jess is joined by THE L WORD creator and show-runner Ilene Chaiken! Ilene discusses running Aaron Spelling's production company, her real-life version of The Planet, the head of Showtime wanting to cast Leisha Hailey as Shane, Jennifer Beals choosing Laurel Holloman as Tina, and Mia Kirshner's brilliant improv as Jenny. Also discussed: Ilene's original plan for Bette & Tina, contributions to Gen Q, is Gen Q canon, Sepideh Moafi as Gigi, the mistreatment of Daniel Sea (Max) on set, Holland Taylor as Peggy Peabody and a LOT more! Subscribe to her pod here.

    As a reminder, you can listen to past Dyking Off Topic episodes with Carolyn and Melody on our Patreon for $5/month.

    Sponsored by BetterHelp Online Therapy: As a listener, you’ll get 10% off your first month by visiting our sponsor at betterhelp.com/do

    Sponsored by Nutrafol: Get free shipping on every order and $15 off at Nutrafol.com with promo code "DO"

    Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    "Walk Like An Egyptian" w/Sabrina Jalees (Re-release) Jan 03, 2023

    Listen to Carolyn's new podcast Love's A Pitch on Spotify or Apple Podcasts.

    The super hilarious Sabrina Jalees (Carol's Second Act) is letting us get all up in her jizzness as we dyke out about her queer family. Sabrina gives us all the deets into how Wolfie came to be, and why she's the daddy. We talk about how queer families are still sometimes othered, but we're also freaking out every time we see one in the wild. Plus, why are straight people always telling us who will steal our baby? And if that's not enough, we crack the code on how to signal to others that you're queer. We've got a whole lineup of gayest things to talk through this week as we are truly living our best lives. Finally, we end on a question from a listener who isn't really feeling her sweet pandemic boyfriend.

    Sponsored by BetterHelp Online Therapy: As a listener, you’ll get 10% off your first month by visiting our sponsor at betterhelp.com/do

    Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    "The Coolest Lesbian Aesthetic" w/ Joanna Bradley (Re-Release) Dec 27, 2022

    Madras shorts, Kangol hats, 'Menswear,' vests, bold blazers, purposefully bad dye jobs...the spectrum of style in our community is wide and varied. So what is the lesbian aesthetic? Writer and comedian Joanna Bradley (SNL, The Break with Michelle Wolf) reflects on her own style, and that of other queer women she's encountered over the years. Can you tell if someone is a lez just by looking at them? What's that thing that makes you see someone and think "they're on my team?" Are style choices just holdovers from previous decades, or are we just admiring the trends that came before us? Has our fashion always influenced the straights, or is TikTok making us mainstream? But first, Melody breaks down why Demi dodged a bullet, and Carolyn confesses her questionable lesbian fashion choice. Then again, isn't a utilitarian fashion choice the most lesbian of all? Finally, we end with a listener question that coincidently ties nicely into our banter about Demi's ex-fiance.


    Sponsored by BetterHelp Online Therapy: As a listener, you’ll get 10% off your first month by visiting our sponsor at betterhelp.com/do

    Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    "An Ongoing Process" w/ Mae Martin (Re-release) Dec 20, 2022

    Comedian/Writer/Actor and all-around queer darling Mae Martin joins us to dyke out about fluidity this week. You all know Mae from their show Feel Good (stream it on Netflix, Channel 4) and hilarious comedy. They often talk about gender and sexuality on stage, so we loved having the chance to dive in deeper into that conversation. We talk about the value of labels and how things are changing over time. Please stream Feel Good and check out Mae's book Can Everyone Please Calm Down.

    Sponsored by BetterHelp Online Therapy: As a listener, you’ll get 10% off your first month by visiting our sponsor at betterhelp.com/do

    Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    "You Can Love Multiple People" w/ Ashley Ray (Re-release) Dec 13, 2022

    If monogamy isn't for you, you never want to merge bank accounts with someone, but you're got a lot of love to give (and hope to receive it back), then perhaps solo polyamory is right for you! Comedian and writer Ashley Ray has been living that solo polyamory life (in a pandemic no less!) and joins us to correct common misconceptions about her love life. We talk about the funny and tragic red flags she sifts through when dating, how people react to her relationship structure, and why structure and communication are so important. Plus, she talks about her wild zodiac dating experiment which we hope gets made into a TV show. This episode just may leave you polycurious! Plus, Carolyn and Melody talk about Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, The DNC, The Chicks, and our polar opposite gayest things of the week! Finally, we end with a question from a listener who seems to be the victim of an emotional terrorist.

    Sponsored by BetterHelp Online Therapy: As a listener, you’ll get 10% off your first month by visiting our sponsor at betterhelp.com/do

    Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    "We Are Not Possessions" w/ Alysia Brown (Re-release) Dec 06, 2022

    A dating episode in the midst of a global pandemic? If anyone can still have game when the world feels upside down, it's comedian Alysia Brown. From back-to-back dates to picking up audience members on Zoom shows and everything in between, Alysia does it all. She tells us about her dating life before COVID, during quarantine, and what she hopes to find for the future. We implore her to share her tips and go-to moves so that our listeners can learn from her experience. Plus, Melody tries to cheat with her pick for Gayest Thing Of The Week while Carolyn is on her way to becoming a Bernie Sanders meme. Finally, we end with a question from a listener who is questioning her sexuality but afraid of leading on another woman in case it turns out she isn't queer after all.


    Sponsored by BetterHelp Online Therapy: As a listener, you’ll get 10% off your first month by visiting our sponsor at betterhelp.com/do

    Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    "Not Being Near Men" w/ Casey Jane Ellison (Re-release) Nov 29, 2022

    Dykes just wanna have fun, and here to tell us all about it is herlarious comedian, performer, and artist Casey Jane Ellison! It's hard to put into words what makes being a lesbian so dang fun, but that didn't stop us from trying! Is it the sex? The freedom from the male gaze? Underwater waterfalls? THE SEX? Is every commercial featuring a person slo-mo running through a field just an ad for lesbianism? Maybe it is, MAYBE IT IS, Plus, Carolyn and Melody reluctantly make New Year's Resolutions, including a pledge that gets off to a Rosie- er...ROCKY start. Finally, we end with a questions from a listener who is nervous about upcoming physical changes in their partner.

    -For related content, follow us on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram

    -Help more folks find us and Leave Us a 5-star Review if you like what you hear!

    -Theme song by There Is No Mountain

    Sponsored by BetterHelp Online Therapy: As a listener, you’ll get 10% off your first month by visiting our sponsor at betterhelp.com/do

    Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    "Don't F*ck In Our Bathroom" w/ Jo McDaniel (Re-release) Nov 22, 2022

    Our hearts are heavy with the tragedy at Club Q in Colorado Springs. We can't speak highly enough of all the rad humans who work tirelessly to create and maintain queer spaces, so this week we're re-releasing our episode with Jo McDaniel. Since recording this episode, Jo and her partner Rach/Coach have opened As You Are Bar in DC, so please go visit, tip generously, and keep your hands where Jo can see them.

    Believe it or not, we can't talk enough about saving our dyke spaces. And not even an attempted coup by domestic terrorists can stop us. Jo McDaniel, who runs A League of Her Own in Washington D.C., joins us to share what makes these spaces different than any other space. Jo has a long history of bartending and working in queer spaces in D.C.. From hiring femme security staff to conducting hand checks to mandatory consent, you'll learn the ins, outs, and challenges of creating a true safe space for our community.

    Plus, Melody gathers intel from scary websites, and Carolyn sounds like a straight girl...sort of. Finally, we end with a fun AITA-type listener question, which we would LOVE more of.

    Sponsored by BetterHelp Online Therapy: As a listener, you’ll get 10% off your first month by visiting our sponsor at betterhelp.com/do

    Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    "Allies Queef, Accomplices Squirt" w/ Amber Hikes (re-release) Nov 15, 2022

    Show up for this episode, and you might just learn how to better show up for those who could use your accompliceship. Activist Amber Hikes joins us for a thoughtful and fun conversation about how we can make our respective privilege work for others. What's the difference between an ally and an accomplice? And how do we know who we should be listening to for guidance? Plus, what does calling someone in have to do with food stuck in teeth? Also, Melody FINALLY comes around on flags. But before we get to the important stuff, your hosts talk Discord, scones, and cleavage. Finally, we answer a question from a listener who is at a crossroads in their relationship.

    -For related content, follow us on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram

    -Help more folks find us and Leave Us a 5-star Review if you like what you hear!

    -Theme song by There Is No Mountain

    Sponsored by BetterHelp Online Therapy: As a listener, you’ll get 10% off your first month by visiting our sponsor at betterhelp.com/do

    Sponsored by Helix: Helixsleep.com/dykingout for up to $200 off your purchase

    Sponsored by Night Cap: Got to NightCapIt.com and use code DYKINGOUT for 20%off

    Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    "Accent Fingers" w/ Molly Kearney (Re-release) Nov 08, 2022

    NOTE: This interview took place before Molly started using they/them pronouns.

    We're in the thick of Pride month and cooked up this TREAT of an episode with the super funny and wonderful Molly Kearney (Saturday Night Live). Molly lives their life loud and proud, and they make it seem so fun and effortless. What is this beautiful butch dyke's origin story? What gay things is this double-cannon wielding comedian up to? How did they survive being the meat in a triple bunk bed sandwich? Where do they buy their suits? This episode delivers the laughs we all could use right now. Plus, Melody gives a mini history lesson on the infamous Riis beach, and Carolyn goes to Twitter jail for the first time ever. Finally, we end with a listener question about what to do when you and your fiancée don't see eye-to-eye about having children.

    -For related content, follow us on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram

    -Help more folks find us and Leave Us a 5-star Review if you like what you hear!

    -Theme song by There Is No Mountain

    Sponsored by BetterHelp Online Therapy: As a listener, you’ll get 10% off your first month by visiting our sponsor at betterhelp.com/do

    Sponsored by Helix: Helixsleep.com/dykingout for up to $200 off your purchase

    Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    "Centering Joy" w/ Precious Brady-Davis (Re-release) Nov 01, 2022

    Activist, speaker, and author Precious Brady-Davis joins us to share the life lessons she's learned about living authentically, as told in her memoir, I Have Always Been Me. Precious tells us how and why she's always lived fearlessly. She stresses the importance of finding a way to shine regardless of your circumstances. We also dyke out about manifesting the life you want, and how being true to yourself attracts love into your life. Could this conversation be any more gay??? Plus, Carolyn finds a way to bring up Ellen and Rosie, and Melody has a moral dilemma while watching a cishet man squirm. Finally, we end with a question from a listener who wants her dates to have an opinion. Is that too much to ask?

    -For related content, follow us on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram

    -Help more folks find us and Leave Us a 5-star Review if you like what you hear!

    -Theme song by There Is No Mountain

    Sponsored by BetterHelp Online Therapy: As a listener, you’ll get 10% off your first month by visiting our sponsor at betterhelp.com/do

    Sponsored by Helix: Helixsleep.com/dykingout for up to $200 off your purchase

    Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    "The L Word Takes Manhattan" w/ Jenna Lyons (re-release) Oct 25, 2022

    It was recently announced that Jenna Lyons will be on the new cast of RHONY, so we're re-releasing the interview where we (Bravo Influencers) planted the seed:

    It's our first live recording in YEARS, and we couldn't be more thrilled to dyke out with the iconic and stylish Jenna Lyons! We sat down with Jenna on December 7, 2021 at The Wing Soho in front of an audience filled with our favorite listeners. We talk about Jenna's experience of being outed and the learning curve that comes with coming out later in life. Plus, she tells us what changed (and what didn't) in her business and personal relationships as a result. Also, we dive into the highlights of her expansive career at J. Crew, what she's been up to since, and how to get her on another reality TV show (1:04:40). If that's not enough, you'll find out just how much Melody hates the pride flag. Stick around for the audience Q&A, and then our listener question about how to get an aunt to come out of the closet.

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    "Four Negroni Sbagliatos" w/ Kerensa Cadenas - Ep. 255 Oct 18, 2022

    Listen to Carolyn's new podcast Love's A Pitch on Spotify or Apple Podcasts.

    Feeling fine after a night of four meme-inspired drinks, Editorial Director Kerensa Cadenas (New York Magazine) joins us to talk about sapphic TV, bisexual signaling, and dating. So exactly why are queer women going nuts of Negroni Sbagliatos? What can we expect or hope for with the new season of The L Word: Generation Q? Who do we NOT want to win a GLAAD award? Besides the green velvet couch, how else can home decor signal sexuality? Plus, Melody gets her eyes on L Word screeners, and Carolyn gets more conceptual with her gayest thing!

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    -Edited by Lauren Nicole Dougherty

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    "Rabbit Syphilis" w/ Maddie Wiener - Ep. 254 Oct 11, 2022

    Did we convince comedian Maddie Wiener (Comedy Central) to unplug and move to the country on this week's episode? Or maybe their emotional support rabbit will help them cope with living in New York City. Either way, we have a fun conversation about gender, nostalgia, van life, Prada as a queer ally, queer YouTube and more! Plus, Melody and Carolyn go to the premiere of The Lesbian Bar Project series which is out now on the Roku Channel, so check it out.

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    -Edited by Lauren Nicole Dougherty

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    "Lesbian TikTok Drama" w/ Kendall Payne - Ep. 253 Oct 04, 2022

    Is it possible for us to have comedian & filmmaker Kendall Payne on the podcast and NOT talk murder? Listen and find out! High off her brush with lesbian TikTok fame, a trip to The L Word set, and a moment with Fletcher, Kendall returns to the pod to d*ke out about all sorts of lesbian drama, and how her fascination with it got her into The New York Times. Plus, we talk about our experience at The Dinah, feelings on King Princess, problematic TV shows, and more!

    Also, if you want to learn more about what is happening in Iran right now (and you should), here are some Instagram accounts worth following:

    @from____iran

    @1500tasvir

    @nazaninboniadi

    @yasharali

    @iamnazaninnour

    @bahmankalbasi

    @yelmjouie

    @collectiveforblackiranians

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    "Conflict Is Not Abuse" w/ Becca Blackwell (Re-release) Sep 27, 2022

    We're recovering from Dinah Shore and are re-releasing another favorite ep from the archives.

    This episode is everything and nothing, because that's where we always end up when discussing labels. But to us, it's actually everything because we're d*king out with the hilarious and entertaining Becca Blackwell (High Maintenance on HBO)! We talk about their gender and sexuality journey, as well as their relationship to labels throughout their life. What happens when we hold individual definitions for shared labels? Is it okay to disagree about what they mean? What are the spaces we create for our identities and who can occupy them? Can a trans masc person still be a dyke? (ABSOLUTELY).

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    "TikTok Ya Don't Stop" w/ Rosie O'Donnell (Re-release) Sep 20, 2022

    It's the re-release of our 200th episode with one and only Rosie O'Donnell fulfilling the Dyking Out prophecy. Rosie has been doing press for her new show, and it's very interesting to hear her now talking about updates on a lot of the topics we touch on in this interview from a year ago! It may have taken four years of wishing this moment into existence (okay, maybe we did a LITTLE more than wishing), but we finally have our chance to dyke out with Rosie about our favorite topic: Rosie! How is she adjusting to life in L.A.? Why we won't be seeing her character Carrie having sex on this season of The L Word: Generation Q? Plus, all the gay things you've ever wanted to know about A League of Their Own, Now and Then, and other roles. We also learn about her experiences adopting children as a lesbian, coming out, and dating--including how NOT to ask her out. No matter the topic, Rosie makes it fun, interesting, and gay. And would you expect any different from the ultimate Dykon? TikTok ya' don't stop!

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    "But I'm A Cheerleader" w/ Jamie Babbit (Rerelease) Sep 13, 2022

    Your hosts with the mosts are traveling this week, so we're revisiting one of our favorite interviews with Director Jamie Babbit. Jamie most recently directed the first three episodes of Prime Video's A League of Their Own, which reminded us of our interview where she tells us about working on the show. But most of our conversation centers around one of our favorite movies, But I'm A Cheerleader.

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    "Fingerbanging Dance Floors" w/ Jess Rothschild - Ep. 252 Sep 06, 2022

    We did it. We finally took a gaycation together. Podcaster and Cherry Grove connoisseur Jess Rothschild (Hot Takes and Deep Dives) joins us once more to talk about our magical, misandrist (for Carolyn) weekend on Fire Island. Did we end up meeting Wanda Sykes? How does it compare to PTown? What's the difference in the vibe between Cherry Grove and The Pines? And is there another destination that we can turn into a sapphic paradise? Plus, we review our new favorite drag acts. Also, Carolyn managed to make an enemy (and honestly might make more after listening to this episode).

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    "Dole Whip & P*ssy" w/ Colette McIntyre -Ep. 251 Aug 30, 2022

    Fresh off influencing the gravitational pull of the moon amongst a sea of queers, writer/comedian/past guest Colette McIntyre joins us to talk about a complicated trip to a different kind of magical place. One with garbage cans worth stanning. One with shirts about wanting and giving the "D." One with riddles and pins and barbershop quartets and vegan soft serve. Yes, Colette went to Disneyland for the first time as an adult and lived to tell about it. We dissect her experience and try to understand the draw for the queer community. Plus, we do our best to project our sexuality onto Disney stories and characters. An no, it's not just the villains. And yes, all the villains are gay. Lastly, is it worth losing all your friends to have a wedding photo opp with Mickey and Minnie?

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    -Edited by Lauren Nicole Dougherty

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    "The Queer Mecca" w/ Mariah Hanson - Ep. 250 Aug 24, 2022

    We're counting down the weeks until we can wish folks a "Happy Dinah" IRL in Palm Springs. And to get us even more pumped for the occasion, we're dyking out with the founder of the largest lesbian event in the world, Mariah Hanson! So how did Mariah go from getting all parties banned on her college campus to putting on a queer music festival in the desert? What are the challenges in keeping the event focused on queer women while also being inclusive to all genders and identities? What keeps the celesbians coming back year after year? We cover all of this, and more. And by more we mean bees. There's a healthy amount of bee discourse. Plus, Carolyn and Melody obsess over the new A League of Their Own series.

    To get your passes to this year's Club Skirts Dinah Shore Weekend, go to https://thedinah.com/.

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    "Ellen, But Violent" w/ Rachel Kaly - Ep. 249 Aug 16, 2022

    Maybe he knows it, maybe he doesn't, but Timothée Chalamet definitely needs comedian Rachel Kaly in his life. Rachel details her very relatable admiration of our favorite (and only) male dykon, along with a crazy wonderful story that proves we live in a simulation. So how did Rachel go from a Cracker Barrel shirt and tie-wearing nine-year-old telling jokes at Gotham, to a master Ellen DeGeneres impersonator, to an agent of hilarious onstage chaos? Give this ep a listen and find out! Plus, Melody becomes a birth certificate sleuth for the gayest reason possible, and Carolyn takes credit for dyking up PTown.

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    "Teenage Simba" w/ Nico Carney - Ep. 248 Aug 09, 2022

    If you've cried while coming out to your soccer coach, then you have something in common with comedian Nico Carney (Netflix, Boys' Club podcast). Fresh off a killer set at our Stonewall Inn show, Nico joins us to share his coming out story, his next coming out story, and the literature that helped inspire both. Plus, we talk about his Boys' Club show/podcast and experience in the first Netflix is a Joke festival. And if that's not enough, hear Melody geek out big time over...Grover?

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    "Reclaiming My T*tty Time" w/ Sheria Mattis -Ep. 247 Aug 02, 2022

    Comedian (and hopefully new bff of the pod) Sheria Mattis joins us to ask all the right questions about studs and fibroids. Well, technically she answers more than she asks about fibroids, but we truly go on a reproductive health journey this episode. Plus, we talk about desired technological updates for straps and those who wear them. Also, Sheria makes Carolyn rethink her gay origin story, while Melody becomes convinced she should get checked for fibroids.

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    -Edited by Lauren Nicole Dougherty

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    "New Queer Face of 9/11" w/ Emily Dayton Evans - Ep. 246 Jul 26, 2022

    Some of us truly live for the applause, and this week's guest will not shy away from that fact. Comedian and performer Emily Dayton Evans joins us to talk about her journey from fragile human to saliva-swapping comedian. Did you know it was possible to grown up in Vermont without a driver's license? Are walkie talkies a couples' gift or intended for one person only? What's the hot goss with age gap relationships on TikTok? We cover all this and so much more. Plus, would you be into our fall dyke outing proposed in this ep???

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    -Edited by Lauren Nicole Dougherty

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    "Lesbian Teenage Boy Phase" w/ Eman El-Husseini - Ep. 245 Jul 19, 2022

    If you're comedian Eman El-Husseini's therapist, DO NOT listen to this episode. We had so much fun catching up with Eman about all of her 'late in life' activities, like getting into edibles and terrible lesbian movies. Also, why do people in Buffalo allegedly hate Bon Jovi? Is it okay to compete in couples therapy? How can a bulldog be ugly? Are lesbian personal trainers better? And why does Eman want people to touch her arms, but "just a little?" Plus, our very different gayest things of the week, and some apartment building gossip.

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    -Edited by Lauren Nicole Dougherty

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    "Lesbian Word Vomit" w/ Liza Dye - Ep. 244 Jul 12, 2022

    Our favorite celesbian gossip queen, Liza Dye (@BettePorterGallery) takes a break from living her best Jenny Schecter life to share her thoughts on headline-making queers. From defending Cara Delevigne's public behavior, to calling out a that's-so-questionable marriage, to stanning the messiest queers . And yet, we don't get a change to dish on some of the top hot goss because we get derailed by corporate pride weirdness. But we do have time for Liza's glowing review of Love's A Pitch. Plus, what happens when creators call Liza out on her posts? Also, we know we tease a juicy Patreon ep, but that will come in a few weeks because we had too much fun recording and ran out of time. But if you're hungry for more, make sure you give Liza a follow, and check out her standup at a live show in New York or L.A.!

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    -Edited by Lauren Nicole Dougherty

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    "Finances and Feelings" w/ Gaby Dunn - Ep. 243 Jul 05, 2022

    From queer tumblr icon to diy financial guru (gay-ru?), Gaby Dunn joins us to talk about the oppressive systems working against us. Don't worry, we make it fun! Fresh off the release of their newebook and audiobook on Scribd, Stimulus Wreck: Rebuilding After a Financial Crisis, Gaby talks about navigating our new reality and rebuilding after a financial disaster. Are millennials uniquely bad with money, or are we just being gaslit into thinking we're incapable of making good financial decisions? Plus, we talk about working the red carpet, corporate pride, podcast sponsors, and more! And if that's not enough, Gaby also gives us the 411 on their short film Grindr Baby!

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    "Deleting Tweets" w/ Ely Kreimendahl - Ep. 242 Jun 28, 2022

    Full disclosure: we recorded this episode a few weeks ago when we were at normal rage levels. So take a listen and remember slightly less terrifying times as comedy writer Ely Kreimendahl teaches us about dramatic psycho therapy and so much more! Carolyn and Ely bond over their time at school in Boston where they struggled to feel comfortable around lesbians. Then, we talk about Twitter trolls and trauma and when it's right to delete the tweet. Plus, we learn about Ely's experience with straight people who wrongly assume her and her husband are a cis straight couple. And of course, you don't want to miss our gayest things that span from drag vomit to baby astrology.

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    "The Gayest Town On Earth" w/ Mitra Kaboli - Ep. 241 Jun 21, 2022

    Fresh off the release of her new podcast Welcome To Provincetown, award-winning audio documentarian Mitra Kaboli joins us to d*ke out about the town with seemingly few d*kes around! We do our best Nancy Drew impression and try to piece together why this gaycation destination centers cis gay men. For real, we want to know why aren't there lesbian orgies abound in the artsiest, most dog-friendly part of Cape Cod. Can not even the self-proclaimed Lord Of The Lesbians turn things around? Plus, why is Mitra looking to ditch the "straight side" of her bisexuality, and who else has heard of Concordia University? This episode is really just step one in organizing the sapphic takeover of Provincetown, so LET'S GO LESBIANS!

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    "Squirting Through My Eyes" w/ Flora Manon - Ep. 240 Jun 14, 2022

    Local twerking celeb and comedian Flora Manon joins us to talk about bruised knees, breakups, and one hot bartender. It's a wild episode where we touch on a little bit of everything, from cat collages to moms doing the work to disabled sisters who need to be taken down a peg. We also talk about the struggle of being in a relationship with differing views on non-monogamy. Plus, Carolyn gushes about Girls In Wonderland, which she promises not to bring up until the next time she goes. And Melody spills about a celesbian-filled evening back in NYC.

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    "The Blindfold Is So Essential" w/ Yin Q - Ep. 239 Jun 07, 2022

    Get out your leather and *checks notes* American Revolution leotards? Because we're talking all things kink with writer, activist, and BDSM practitioner Yin Q! Okay, maybe not ALL things, but Melody and Carolyn ask Yin all the newbie and vulnerable questions we could think of. What stops people from exploring kink? What are read flags when playing with a more experienced kinkster? Where does one even start? What are common misconceptions? How can we be better allies to sex workers? Give it a listen and see how high your freak flag flies!

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    "Eating Ass is Queer First Base" w/ Honey Pluton - Ep. 238 May 31, 2022

    You're in for a sweet treat because we're having a gay ol' time with hilarious comedian Honey Pluton! Honey goes off on all the things our community needs to be reminded of. Like what should you do if you run into an ex at Pride? What are the queer bases? Why does @$$ eating have to do with birthday invites? What's a concept of clothing vs. actual clothing? Plus, we share an important PSA about party drugs at Pride. Honey also shares a gayest thing that is peak 2022. Be sure to catch their live show Honey Dew if you're in NYC!

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    "Through The Spaghetti Vine" w/ Samee Junio - Ep. 237 May 24, 2022

    Get out your forks and dig into this ep featuring your new spaghetti-loving long-distance crush, Samee Junio (Historical Roasts on Netflix)! We're talking carbs, tattoos, dogs, long-distance relationships, astrology, and more. It's more like, what don't we talk about? Plus, how gay can one make karaoke? And can you watch a queer movie too many times? Also, what the hell happened to Quibi, and why is Melody the reason it didn't last? We're answering all the questions you never asked! Bon appétit!

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    "The World is Down One Sick Rack" w/ DeAnne Smith - Ep. 236 May 17, 2022

    We made contact with comedian and writer DeAnne Smith (Netflix) from their underground Canadian bunker for an episode that will have you thinking about nipples, or the absence of them. DeAnne tells us about their recovery from top surgery, the overwhelming nipple considerations, and the sick rack they parted with. We also address Important Lesbian Questions like If you're friends with an ex, when can you call them a friend instead of your ex? How do you get over heartache? How can you use your assets to advance social justice causes? If you're in New York City, be sure to catch DeAnne's monthly show DeAnarchy at Union Hall!

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    "What Would Anne Lister Do?" w/ Sally Wainwright - Ep. 235 May 10, 2022

    This episode is sponsored by Ana Luisa Jewelry offering a special discount for our listeners.

    Anne Lister is THRIVING thanks our guest Sally Wainwright, the creator of Gentleman Jack , now in its second season on HBO. Whether or not you've seen the show, this is the perfect episode to learn more about one of the most fascinating d*kes who never got her due in our history books. Sally talks about the breadth and quality of Anne's diaries and how they shaped the show. Yes, we ask about the pube lockets. But we also talk about so much more! Also, for all of you Last Tango in Halifax fans, we ask her about it. Looking for more content? Head to our Patreon to hear Melody's most INSANE dating app story.

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    "Playing The Long Game" w/ Sammi Cohen - Ep. 234 May 03, 2022

    Melody Kamali got stuck sitting weird in a chair (she had a last-minute conflict) and won't be on this week's episode. But we wanted to record it and put it out anyway because we are so excited to talk about the movie we all wish existed in our formative years. We've got Sammi Cohen talking all things Crush (streaming now on Hulu), a new queer coming-of-age romcom that will have you speaking in puns. Or signing up for sports you're not good at. Or learning how to skateboard. Do we finally have the queer movie we've always wanted? What went on behind the scenes to ensure an authentic and entertaining story? How did Sammi bring her own experiences to the film? Why do straight girls keep insisting on tickling each other's backs? In terms of queer storytelling, where do we go from here? We hope you love this movie as much as we do!

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    "I'm Not Your Mother" w/ ContraPoints (Natalie Wynn) - Ep. 233 Apr 26, 2022

    Are you in a parasocial relationship with this week's guest? Or with us? You're probably not alone! YouTuber (or video essayist, pick your poison) and ex-philosopher Natalie Wynn, known by most as ContraPoints, joins us to d*ke out about our strange digital relationships. Sometimes it's angry people hiding behind anime avatars. Other times, it's people you've never met inviting you to their wedding. And if you're lucky, it's really great folks in your audience who you enjoy getting to know and maybe become friends with! Also, we touch on the power of crystals, and Natalie has the best answer to our new final question.

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    "Secretly Holding Hands" w/ Aby James - Ep. 232 Apr 19, 2022

    BIG EP ALERT! We're changing up our format to freshen up the way we d*ke out. And what better guest for this than comedian and actor Aby James (How I Met Your Father). Aby tells us about her unique relationship with her therapist, playing Tien Tran's love interest, her old YouTube videos, and what happened when she fell in love with her best friend. How far would you go to spend the most time with your best friend who you happen to be in love with but may not be fully aware of that fact? Probably not as far as Aby! Also, what's all the hype about Hype D*kes? We hope you like the new format, and as always, head to the Patreon for all the juicy gay goss.

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    The Chart w/ Zara Barrie - Ep. 231 Apr 12, 2022

    How many lines connect you to your local Shane on The Chart? Lesbian aficionada, writer, author, and performer Zara Barrie joins us to explore the tangled webs we weave in our community. Is it okay to hook up with a friend's ex? Why do 'charts' feel more real in smaller cities? When queer women go after straights, is it because they've exhausted their own chart? Should we put all our projects on hold to make a master Celesbian chart? Which one of us is the real Alice Pieszecki? Okay, we don't address that last one, but feel free to let us know your opinion. Plus, Melody gays up the Grammy's and Carolyn wants to change an icon's life story. And finally, we get a short and sweet listener question but give it the longest answer.

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    Drums w/ G Flip - Ep. 230 Apr 05, 2022

    We're joined by drummer and lead singer G Flip, fresh off touring with Fletcher, for a chat about drums, their music career, and what it means to have a cheeky pash. We learn about their journey, from their upbringing in Melbourne where they preferred wearing the boy's school uniform, to coming into their own as a queer non-binary artist. Also, we learn about why they got into drumming and the amazing mentor who guided them. Plus, how are G Flip's Aussie fans handling them settling down in L.A.? You'll have to just listen to find out! And it wouldn't be an episode of Dyking Out if we weren't sharing our gayest things! Carolyn supports past guests, while Melody loosens up with the gays. Finally, we dissect a listener's Bumble profile.

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    Empathy w/ Dylan Marron - Ep. 229 Mar 29, 2022

    This episode is for anyone who has ever been on the receiving end of mean remarks or straight up hatorade. Writer, podcaster, and comedian Dylan Marron joins us to talk about the power of empathy through lessons he's learned by talking to the people who make nasty comments to him online. We talk about his podcast and new book with the same name, Conversations With People Who Hate Me. Plus, we break down the motivations for seeking out information about strangers who hurt us on the internet. And once you get that information, what power does it have? Also, Dylan shares his thoughts on calling haters "trolls," shares his hopes for our listeners, attempts to explain Turtle Bay, and more! Also, Carolyn thinks she's found the queerest place in NYC while Melody ventures to Astoria. Finally, we end with a question from a listener who is having an impossible time trying to find someone to date.

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    Lesbian Pop Culture w/ Jill Gutowitz - Ep. 228 Mar 22, 2022

    Yesterday's "uber d*ke" is today's "it girl," and we've got Jill Gutowitz (Girls Can Kiss Now) on the pod to explain how we got here. Jill holds our triggered hands and walks us through the key moments in lesbian pop culture that scarred us, and eventually freed us. How is Perez Hilton different from wishful queers? Why hasn't Lindsay Lohan been herself? What is it about Neve Campbell's bangs? Also, what do milfs have to do with expressing desire for physical harm? We explore these questions and more. And, if you want even more on these topics, check out Jill's new book, Girls Can Kiss Now. If you love it, be sure to leave a positive review! Plus, both our gayest things involve music videos. And finally, we end with a question from a listener with rude-ass friends.

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    TV Writing w/ Brittani Nichols - Ep. 227 Mar 15, 2022

    We often talk about the lack of authentic and funny queer stories, and TV writers like Brittani Nichols (Abbott Elementary, Black Lady Sketch Show) are doing the work to give our community the content we crave. Hear how Brittani went from TV nerd to pitching jokes in the writer's room. What are some challenges that TV writers face when trying to tell our stories? What's it like to work with other queer writers? How can we get to more authentic stories? How does Brittani balance her career with social justice work? Plus, Carolyn goes back and forth on her gayest thing, while Melody leans into her Connecticut origins. Finally, we end on a listener question-ish about the Lesbian Master Doc.

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    Rejection w/ Alysia Hush - Ep. 226 Mar 08, 2022

    We hope comedian Alysia Hush felt the opposite of rejection while dyking out with us this week. Rejection is something we all face - some of us more than others. But how we deal with it makes all the difference. We talk about the differences between personal and professional rejection, how we bounce back, when we accept the L, and when to take it personally. We also talk about rejection in dating, including memorable embarrassing rejections. Plus, Melody's gayest thing surprises Carolyn, while Carolyn runs into celesbians at Stonewall. Finally, we end with a listener question from someone in an impossibly complicated and unexpected situation.

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    Knitting w/ Tyisha Berger - Ep. 225 Mar 01, 2022

    No need to spin a yarn on this episode as we have Tyisha Berger on to enthusiastically share her passion for knitting! Why does knitting feel so queer? What do people think of it in the crafting community? What are the stereotypes and misconceptions about knitters? How do you even get started? What role does technology play in knitting. We explore these questions and also learn why the rainbow scarf that Carolyn gifted a girlfriend years ago may have doomed the relationship. Also, be sure to swing by Good Judy in Brooklyn for Ty's craft night, or any night so you can say hi and tip generously! Plus, Carolyn explains what solidarity tassels are, while Melody makes being attacked by a dog gay. Finally, we end with question from a listener who struggles with her partner being closeted. #knittingissexy

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    Everything w/ Softee - Ep. 224 Feb 22, 2022

    What happens when three capricorns get together to dyke out? You talk about a little bit of everything! Actor and musician Nina Grollman AKA Softee joins us to talk about everything from astrology, to Nathan For You, to video games, to crying on stage, and more! What a great time to be queer, alive, and talking about everyday life on Zoom. Plus, why are straights fighting about the Kinsey scale? And did anyone find love on Carolyn's Valentine's Day dating show? Finally, we end with a question from a bi$exual who struggles to befriend women.

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    The Homo Schedule w/ Liv Hewson & Jasmin Savoy - Ep. 223 Feb 15, 2022

    We've got a delightful mix of queer joy and cannibalism on the agenda with actors Liv Hewson and Jasmin Savoy (Yellowjackets on Showtime). First, we get all of our fangirling out of the way by asking about our favorite new show, as well as Scream, Santa Clarita Diet, and other projects these two talents have under their very gay belts. Then, we talk about their new podcast (Most Presents: The Homo Schedule) and what it means to spread queer joy. Also, we feel inspired to take a cue from our guests and bring a game into the ep, so get ready to play Gay Or Straight Agenda along with us! Finally, we end with a question from a listener who feels like they're out of love luck. Just in time for Valentine's Day.

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    Music Videos w/ Pamela Ross - Ep. 222 Feb 08, 2022

    Do you miss the days of feverishly calling into Total Request Live? Longing for the time when everyone knew the same choreography and it had nothing to do with TikTok? Comedian Pamela Ross joins us to talk about the slow-dying piece of pop culture known as the music video. Who used to be considered music video royalty? And is there anyone comparable today? Why were they so sexy? What low-brow dummies actually loved The Bum Bum Song (spoiler: it was Carolyn). This episode is like an audio-only pop-up video with opinions and foggy recollections instead of facts! Plus, our gayest things lean heavily into astrology. Finally, we answer a question from a listener AND lecture them about being creepy.

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    Non-Monogamy w/ Casey Tanner - Ep. 221 Feb 01, 2022

    We're opening up about non-monogamy this week with renowned queer sex therapist Casey Tanner! What is non-monogamy and how does it relate to polyamory? Have you ever wondered if non-monogamy is right for you? What steps should couples take before opening up a relationship? Why are there so few accurate representations of it in media? Can monogamous couples learn lessons from non-monogamy? We answer these questions, share personal experiences, and so much more! (But remember if you want even more personal experiences, you have to sign up for our Patreon where you'll get a bonus episode each week!) Plus, Carolyn reveals what may just be her gayest thing yet! And, Melody has a classic "what not to do" interaction with a hetero. Finally, we answer a question from a listener who has to come out to unsupportive parents.

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    Accompliceship w/ Amber Hikes - Ep. 220 Jan 25, 2022

    Show up for this episode, and you might just learn how to better show up for those who could use your accompliceship. Activist Amber Hikes joins us for a thoughtful and fun conversation about how we can make our respective privilege work for others. What's the difference between an ally and an accomplice? And how do we know who we should be listening to for guidance? Plus, what does calling someone in have to do with food stuck in teeth? Also, Melody FINALLY comes around on flags. But before we get to the important stuff, your hosts talk Discord, scones, and cleavage. Finally, we answer a question from a listener who is at a crossroads in their relationship.

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    90s Queer Subtext w/ Nayomi Reghay - Ep. 219 Jan 18, 2022

    Did you love that queer storyline in Empire Records, or were you not watching it through rainbow-colored glasses? Comedian and writer Nayomi Reghay joins us to talk about things that felt super gay in the 90s, but probably weren't meant to. But with such limited content that was explicitly queer, we were forced to create our own narratives. It didn't help that every teen heartthrob looked like a soft butch, or that the lead actress in a romcom always had a female friend who only cared about her. And sure, she's not subtext, but we just had to talk about our good friend Ro, and Nayomi is the reason why Carolyn met Rosie in the first place. We also address important questions, like, "Is making banana bread gay?" Plus, Carolyn and Melody book a couple of gaycations. And finally, we answer a question from a listener who isn't sure if they want to have kids.

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    Queer Imposter Syndrome w/ Janet Hyde - Ep. 218 Jan 11, 2022

    FEMALE comedian Janet Hyde joins us to talk about her past struggles with self-diagnosed Queer Imposter Syndrome. Have you ever felt like you weren't queer enough? Do lesbian cultural references have you scratching your head? Or do actual lesbians have you doubting yourself? (Shame on them!). Many people have wrestled with feeling unsure of their place in the queer community. Especially bi/pan/queer folks. And especially when first coming out. But are we holding ourselves to standards that aren't based in reality? And what can we do to overcome those feelings of not being enough? You know, besides getting engaged to another queer person. Plus, Carolyn's gayest thing reminds Melody of her bisexual awakening, and Melody tries to take down a bigoted two-steppin' hot spot once and for all! Finally, we end with not one, but TWO listener questions!

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    New Year's w/ Kemah Bob - Ep. 217 Jan 04, 2022

    New year, new, well...why does anything have to be new? Delightfully funny comedian Kemah Bob joins us to process the end of one calendar year and the start of a new one. Why are we tempted to revise and reinvent ourselves? Must you possess big journaling energy to be more present? Should you kick off the year by muting people on social media? Also, we learn about Kemah's drag persona, their nana, and who is in their core 4, Plus, Melody reflects on the gay moments from her birthday, and Carolyn finds a way to make watching Carol even more gay. Finally, we end with a question we're not qualified to answer about awkward public restroom confrontations.

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    Birding w/ Grace Bonney - Ep. 216 Dec 28, 2021

    The bird's the word on this episode with author and blogger Grace Bonney. Grace's love of watching birds is queer and contagious. So what's the big deal about birding anyway? How can it positively affect your mental health? What's the community like? Why does it feel so queer? Which birds seem most sapphic? Are all pigeons elder queers? We answer all these questions and nerd out about so much more. Plus, we also talk about Grace's latest book, Collective Wisdom, and what they learned in the process of writing it. Also, find out if the omicron variant hindered Carolyn and Melody's gayness this week. Finally, we strap in for a listener question about strap-on etiquette.

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    Rainbow Rap w/ Dai Burger - Ep. 215 Dec 21, 2021

    Not even the omicron variant could stop us from pushing out this episode about rainbow rap with the brightest artist in the game, Dai Burger! Hot off her latest release, Back in ya Mouf, Dai speaks to the importance of being true to yourself in an industry that tries to place you in pre-defined categories. Plus, she tells us about her early influences and shares her music-making process. And yes, we bring up Queen Latifah. But before we get to this uplifting interview, Carolyn and Melody get hit with COVID, hard. Though before their week took a drastic turn, they were able to share in the most joyful and gay event. Finally, we end with a question about terminology. Stay safe, vaccinated, boosted, and fabulous. Happy holigays!

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    Jenna Lyons Live! - Ep. 214 Dec 14, 2021

    It's our first live recording in YEARS, and we couldn't be more thrilled to dyke out with the iconic and stylish Jenna Lyons! We sat down with Jenna on December 7 at The Wing Soho in front of an audience filled with our favorite listeners. We talk about Jenna's experience of being outed and the learning curve that comes with coming out later in life. Plus, she tells us what changed (and what didn't) in her business and personal relationships as a result. Also, we dive into the highlights of her expansive career at J. Crew, what she's been up to since, and how to get her on another reality TV show. If that's not enough, you'll find out just how much Melody hates the pride flag. Stick around for the audience Q&A, and then our listener question about how to get an aunt to come out of the closet.

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    Cuffing Season w/ Amanda Grace Jenkins - Ep. 213 Dec 07, 2021

    Looking to settle down with someone in time for the long, dark winter months? Amanda Grace Jenkins from HBO Max's 12 Dates of Christmas joins us fresh(ish) off an accelerated cuffing season experiment! But is cuffing season really a thing? Is it something that people talk about but not actually practice?When does it even start? Can dating around the holidays accelerate things especially fast? Also, we get into the behind-the-scenes of Amanda Grace's reality show experience. Plus, Carolyn struggles to find a gayest thing beyond the few bars she parties at, and Melody finds a way to keep it gay while sick. Finally, we end on a question from a listener who wants her new squeeze to block and ex.

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    Cottagecore w/ Lady Lamb - Ep. 212 Nov 30, 2021

    Break out your crafted doily coasters and put those wildflowers in a curated arrangement of bud vases because we're dyking out with Lady Lamb about cottagecore! What exactly is cottagecore? And do we actually know what we're talking about? What are the expectations of a cottagecore lifestyle vs. the reality? Why doesn't anyone talk about the raking? Take a listen and see if we convince Melody to move to the woods. And when you're done, listen to Lady Lamb's music (and if you're already listening, listen some more). Also, Carolyn manages to find a new reason to talk about burlesque. Plus, Melody reviews a new and possibly camp film. Finally, we answer a question from a listener who is feeling predatory.

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    Anxiety w/ Cuppie Bragg - Ep. 211 Nov 23, 2021

    Tampa Baes fave Cuppie Bragg is on the pod to dyke out about anxiety, and we love that for us. First, we ask her to spill the tea on all the drama from her Amazon Prime docuseries. Then, we talk about living with and managing anxiety in day-to-day life. What are healthy and unhealthy coping mechanisms? How does it affect our career choices? What should you know if you're dating someone with severe anxiety? Plus, we plot a future Cubbyhole takeover. Before we get to the interview, Carolyn and Melody share what they did for Transgender Awareness Week and other gay happenings. Finally, we end with a question from a listener who is frustrated with her male-dominated workplace.

    -Tickets to our Nov. 29 Dyking Out at Stonewall show are on sale now.

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    Bi Culture w/ Jen Winston - Ep. 210 Nov 16, 2021

    If your BiFi is pinging, that's because we've got writer and author Jen Winston on the pod to byke out about Bi Culture! Is bi culture actually a thing, or our we latching onto a collection of normal behaviors like cuffing pants, getting a bob, and getting comfortable in big chairs? What would a bisexual bar look like? Should cis men be at Cubbyhole? How do you know if you're feeling internalized biphobia or straightphobia? And why aren't pride flags sexier? We discuss all these questions as well as other themes from Jen's new book, Greedy: Notes From A Bisexual Who Wants Too Much. Plus, Carolyn steals Melody's identity by getting really into dancing and astrology, while Melody tries to see if there is truth to a royal fable. Finally, we end with a question about cishets, gender, and spoons.

    -Starter Jacket, the short story we reference in the listener question by Ever Mainard.

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    Tampa Baes w/ Shiva Pishdad - Ep. 209 Nov 09, 2021

    BAEDAY! BAEDAY! We've got fan-favorite Shiva Pishdad dyking out about Prime Video's Tampa Baes (out now!). Shiva takes us behind-the-scenes to tell us how the new docuseries came together. Plus, we ask the questions on everybody's minds. Like, where does she get her swagger? How much of the drama is real vs. manufactured? Do the baes still all hang out? Would they all return for a season two? And most importantly, who should slide into Shiva's DMs? Also, hear why Carolyn can't stop talking about Sunday's at The Stonewall Inn, and why Melody opted for a chill Halloween. Finally, we end with a question from a listener looking for fun ways to get through a breakup.

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    Couples Therapy w/ Madelein Smith - Ep. 208 Nov 02, 2021

    Get ready to process some feelings because we've got comedian Madelein Smith (Cheers For Queers podcast) here to talk about Couples Therapy! How does this topic make you feel? Whether you've done couples therapy, haven't had the chance, or actively avoid it, there's a lot to be said. Do we actually need couples therapy if our tendency is to over-process and over-communicate? Is it a helpful tool or a potential new source of conflict? We talk about our personal experiences with it, as well as when and why we've avoided it. Plus, we talk about some of the relationship difficulties that can be unique to comedians and artists. Also, Carolyn lets Melody pick her gayest thing from a long list, while Melody has Carolyn running off to YouTube. Finally, we end with a question that speaks to the experiences of both hosts.

    -Get extra content EACH WEEK, Ad Free episodes, support the pod, and get to know other listeners by joining our Patreon community.

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    Glitter Grind w/ Ivy Les Vixens - Ep. 207 Oct 26, 2021

    Get out those crisp dollar bills (or Starbucks gift cards) so you can show this episode some proper love because we're dyking out with Ivy from Les Vixens burlesque! She's the lesbian queen who has kept so many queer parties going in Florida and around the country. From helping make Girl The Party THE party for queer women, to leading the largest LGBTQ+ burlesque troupe in the country, Ivy is living that glitter grind life. But it's not all tassels and thongs. Her and her dancers are committed to making positive change in our community and making sure our allies walk the walk. We learn about the challenges creating safe spaces in queer nightlife, but also the challenges of dating a burlesque performer. Have you booked your flight to Orlando yet? Speaking of Orlando, Carolyn gives her take on Girls in Wonderland, while Melody is stuck thinking about Tampa. Finally, we end with a listener question that comes in multiple choice form.

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    Friendships With Exes w/ Christina Cauterucci - Ep. 206 Oct 19, 2021

    Being friends with an ex can be messy, rewarding, or both. Writer and Slate podcaster Christina Cauterucci joins us to explore why keeping your exes close is queer culture. Why is it harder for the cishets? When is it problematic? What are the signs that you shouldn't be friends with an ex? Also, we talk about friend group dynamics post-breakup. And, we challenge the thesis of Christina's cherished Slate article based on Melody's IRL experience. As usual, we reveal our gayest things: ashes and queer force shield edition. Finally, we end with a tough question about internalized homophobia.

    -Get extra content EACH WEEK, Ad Free episodes, support the pod, and get to know other listeners by joining our Patreon community.

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    Between Relationships w/ Gia Woods - Ep. 205 Oct 12, 2021

    What's your 'between relationships' mode? LA-based pop performer Gia Woods has found herself in that very situation and is looking to break old habits. Is it possible to resist entering a new relationship post-breakup if a great person enters your life? And, how do you know if your breakup is the ACTUAL breakup? What are the telltale signs of a serial monogamist. Plus, Gia talks about how her breakups influence her music and help her feel empowered. Also, we reveal our gayest things with some great music and celesbians mixed in. Finally, we answer a question from a young listener struggling with internalized homophobia.

    -COME TO OUR LIVE RECORDING OCTOBER 13! In-person and virtual tickets are on sale now.

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    Queer Families w/ Sabrina Jalees - Ep. 204 Oct 05, 2021

    The super hilarious Sabrina Jalees (Carol's Second Act) is letting us get all up in her jizzness as we dyke out about her queer family. Sabrina gives us all the deets into how Wolfie came to be, and why she's the daddy. We talk about how queer families are still sometimes othered, but we're also freaking out every time we see one in the wild. Plus, why are straight people always telling us who will steal our baby? And if that's not enough, we crack the code on how to signal to others that you're queer. We've got a whole lineup of gayest things to talk through this week as we are truly living our best lives. Finally, we end on a question from a listener who isn't really feeling her sweet pandemic boyfriend.

    -COME TO OUR LIVE RECORDING OCTOBER 13! In-person and virtual tickets are on sale now.

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    Sorority Life w/ Sophie Santos - Ep. 203 Sep 28, 2021

    Roll tide! We've got Sophie Santos back on the pod for another round of sapphic conversation. This time, we're dyking out about Sorority Life, a topic that comes up in Sophie's new memoir, The One You Want To Marry (And Other Identities I've Had). Are queer women especially drawn to sororities? What parts of being in a sorority feel extra gay? Are they becoming more inclusive and open to the queer community? Why is TikTok dunking on pledges? Also, Sophie teaches us all how NOT to befriend a stripper. (Bambi, are you listening?). Plus, Melody tries to put a new spin on an old gayest thing while Carolyn doubles up. Finally, we have a listener question that we hope everyone is otay with.

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    Culture Shock w/ Kristen Becker - Ep. 202 Sep 21, 2021

    We're dyking out with possibly the d*kiest d*ke we know! Comedian Kristen Becker has found herself in many situations where she's landed in unfamiliar territory, or helps bring others outside their comfort zone. Through comedy, activism, and serving our community, Kristen is a master at navigating different people and places. And once she's there, she lets her dyke presence be known. Plus, learn about the incredible work she does to bring queer youths to Provincetown for Summer Of Sass. Also, Carolyn and Melody spill LIMITED deets about their encounter with celesbian royalty. They also talk about boarding a yacht full of lesbians and a super gay concert lineup. Finally, they end with a listener question from a cis man!!! Can you believe it??

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    Queer Lit Community w/ Zoe Whittall - Ep. 201 Sep 14, 2021

    The writing community seems to be getting more queer by the minute. Author Zoe Whittall joins us to talk about her experiences as a queer writer as she releases her latest fiction novel, The Spectacular. Are publishers better about understanding our community? What's the twitter drama all about? Is it okay to have a bisexual murderer as a character? Plus, we talk about Zoe's next project involving one of Carolyn's favorite topics. Support Zoe and your local book store by getting The Spectacular today! Also, Melody goes even deeper into astrology, and Carolyn fulfills all the gay aunt stereotypes. Finally, we end on a listener question about how to find the queers at her college.

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    Rosie O'Donnell - Ep. 200 Sep 07, 2021

    It's our 200th episode, and we've got the one and only Rosie O'Donnell here to fulfill the Dyking Out prophecy. It may have taken four years of wishing this moment into existence (okay, maybe we did a LITTLE more than wishing), but we finally have our chance to dyke out with Rosie about our favorite topic: Rosie! How is she adjusting to life in L.A.? Why we won't be seeing her character Carrie having sex on this season of The L Word: Generation Q? Plus, all the gay things you've ever wanted to know about A League of Their Own, Now and Then, and other roles. We also learn about her experiences adopting children as a lesbian, coming out, and dating--including how NOT to ask her out. No matter the topic, Rosie makes it fun, interesting, and gay. And would you expect any different from the ultimate Dykon? TikTok ya' don't stop!

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    Real Housewives w/ Kayla Kumari Upadhyaya - Ep. 199 Aug 31, 2021

    We're makin' it NICE this episode with our fave L-Word reviewer and writer, Kayla Kumari Upadhyaya! But we're not dyking out about Gen Q. We're dissecting the Real Housewives franchise for all the queer and queer-coded content it regularly serves up. These ladies are acting gay AND doing crimes, so what's more queer than that? And they're not just acting gay, some franchises have queer women amongst the cast. Also, we manage to make comparisons to The L Word. We make the case that The Real Housewives is a great show to watch with your significant other. Plus, we give our REAL gayest things from Provincetown. And we learn straight people will see what they want to see when reading your gay t-shirt. Finally, we end on one of our trickiest listener questions yet!

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    Creative Pursuits w/ Bailey Pope - Ep. 198 Aug 24, 2021

    Comedian Bailey Pope is dyking out with us about how her day job and dream job have more in common than one might assume. Telling jokes on a stage to strangers isn't all that different than years of having a captive audience in a salon seat. Especially at some comedy shows. Bailey talks about the queerness of the hair industry, and how her queer and trans identities are received there vs. in comedy. Plus, learn why she won't date within either field, and how to barter for what you want. Also, Carolyn and Melody try their best to predict their gayest thing as they head out on vacation. Finally, we end with a listener question about "straight" friend with a tendency to "twerk" on her.

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    Hand Sex w/ Ro White - Ep. 197 Aug 17, 2021

    Let's talk about hand sex, baby! Ro White is the new sex and dating editor at Autostraddle, and they're here to get fist-deep into our topic. Though as we learn, fisting is about fullness, not depth. We dyke out about the benefits of digital stimulation, and the role it plays in queer sex. Period sex? Squirting? Fisting? Masturbation? We're rounding all the bases. Plus, Ro talks about how Autostraddle is truly doing the gay lord's work by bringing the queerest, inclusive content to help you navigate your love life. But first, Carolyn and Melody recap their first L Word watch parties as Henrietta Hudson. And, see if they can top those events for their gayest thing! Plus, we end with a different type of listener question that required a little extra prep. Enjoy, and stay sexy!

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    Mommy Issues w/ Brittany Ashley - Ep. 196 Aug 10, 2021

    Writer, actor, and podcaster Brittany Ashley (Don't Tell The Babysitter Mom's Dead, Buzzfeed) joins us to dyke out about the impact of losing her mom at a young age. Don't worry, we have our fair share of laughs along the way. But if you're anything like Melody, keep the tissues nearby. We kick it off by getting all the details on Brittany's recent engagement. Then, Brittany recalls what it was like losing her mom, and how she spent years ignoring the way it affected the relationships in her life. We also talk about how loss can shape your attachment style and the partners you pick. Plus, we discuss how TV and Movie characters who lose their moms early on tend to be queer-coded. Also, find out who Carolyn is stalking this week, and what kind of porn Melody plans on watching with her lover Ali. Finally, we end with a question from a listener who wants our of a toxic friendship.

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    The Road w/ Naomi McPherson - Ep. 195 Aug 03, 2021

    MUNA's very own Naomi McPherson joins us to dyke out about the life of a queer, touring musician. From #vanlife to prank-filled tour buses, what's it really like to hit the road as MUNA? They tell us about their favorite shows to play, how they maintain relationships, and why it can get scary just outside of Pittsburgh. Plus, find out why Naomi can't stop watching the bachelor with their queer friends. Catch MUNA on tour with Phoebe Bridgers, and keep an eye and ear out for new music, coming soon! Also, you'll hear about Melody's new crush from Fire Island, and what makes Carolyn cry in therapy. But honestly, what doesn't make her cry? Finally, we end with a question from a U-Hauler who is looking to make her anniversary extra romantic.

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    Hopeful Romantic w/ Elina Street - Ep. 194 Jul 27, 2021

    Filmmaker Elina Street takes a break from saving the lesbian bars to share her experiences that keep her hopeful about romance. Hot off her recent GoMag article, Elina proves that we can come back from the ashes of a romance that has crashed and burned. But with queer women prone to love addiction, should we proceed with caution? Also, what's love bombing, and is it always a bad thing? How do our ideas of romance change and evolve? Plus, what's the ultimate romantic spot in any city? And before we get into our rose-colored chat, Carolyn and Melody dish on who they're stalking and debate a trip to Tampa. Finally, we end on a listener question from a Patron whose homophobic mom can't get behind her big move.

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    Living Authentically w/ Precious Brady-Davis - Ep. 193 Jul 20, 2021

    Activist, speaker, and author Precious Brady-Davis joins us to share the life lessons she's learned about living authentically, as told in her memoir, I Have Always Been Me. Precious tells us how and why she's always lived fearlessly. She stresses the importance of finding a way to shine regardless of your circumstances. We also dyke out about manifesting the life you want, and how being true to yourself attracts love into your life. Could this conversation be any more gay??? Plus, Carolyn finds a way to bring up Ellen and Rosie, and Melody has a moral dilemma while watching a cishet man squirm. Finally, we end with a question from a listener who wants her dates to have an opinion. Is that too much to ask?

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    Odd One Out w/ Carly Montag - Ep. 192 Jul 13, 2021

    No matter where you fall on the spectrum (even you, straights), or not matter how popular you are, we've all had moments (or lifetimes) of being the odd one out. Comedian Carly Montag (Alone At Lunch podcast) joins us to talk about the many times she felt like an outsider amongst friend and teammates. Why was she so dedicated to wearing overalls? Also, why are people so weird to redheads? And most importantly, how was she so gay without realizing it? But all these instances of feeling different shaped her into who she is today. And that's someone who can't stand to be in a room with another redhead. And also a proudly out comedian and podcaster who is finally living their authentic life. When was the last time you celebrated the things that make you different? Plus, Carolyn talks about her failure to communicate with ghosts, and Melody longs for a simpler, happier time: 2015. Finally, we end on a question from a Patron about queer Chicago nightlife.

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    Queer Climate Change w/ Allison Reese - Ep. 191 Jul 07, 2021

    Is it us, or is the queer community changing more rapidly than in the past? Comedian and writer Allison Reese joins us to talk about the affects of the internet and the passing of time on our perceptions of the (Kamala Harris voice) community. Where is queer culture created? Is the infighting as bad as Twitter makes it seem? Are we being so inclusive that we're better off just excluding cis straights? When will the meat eaters face their moment of reckoning? We also ask the very important question, "is it safe for cartoons to come out of the closet?" Plus, Carolyn and Melody try to pick their gayest moment that wrapped up a memorable pride month. And finally, we end with a question from a literal U-Hauler who is curious about co-habitation masturbation etiquette.

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    Mature Women w/ Whit Washington - Ep. 190 Jun 29, 2021

    Do you often find yourself stanning women of a certain age? You are not alone! Activist Whit Washington joins us to dyke out about their love of the older women on TV and in their life. Why are we so drawn to these ladies? Why do their shows hold up? Does it translate to dating older women IRL? Is it just a queer thing, or is it universal? Also, Whit tells us about their work in advancing rights for the most vulnerable in the LGBTQ+ population. And for those of you looking for a pen pal, look into Pink & Black. Plus, Carolyn and Melody talk about their epic Saturday before pride, including the dyke march and a gaymazing comedy show. Finally, we end with a question from a listener about Carolyn's fertility journey.

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    Red Flags w/ Morgan Miller - Ep. 189 Jun 23, 2021

    Take off those rose-colored glasses because we've got comedian Morgan Miller (UCB) back on the pod, and we're dyking out about red flags. What's the different between a red flag and a dating preference? How do you reveal your own red flags? And should you call them out in others? Are queer women worse off than most when it comes to being deterred by red flags? Or is everyone just a sucker for love? We talk about all of this, plus astrological signs, healing from a traumatic breakup, and casual sex. Want more from Morgan? Check out her new podcast, Famously Dumped. Also, Carolyn and Melody find gayness in their return to in-person comedy. Finally, we end with a listener question that may as well have been written on a red flag.

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    Gay 2000s w/ Grace Perry - Ep. 188 Jun 15, 2021

    If the 2000s made you gay, you're in good company on this episode. Writer and journalist Grace Perry (Reductress, The Onion) joins us to dyke out about the pop culture that inspired her new book The 2000s Made Me Gay. From Taylor Swift lyrics, to Mean Girls, to MTV's Battle Of The Sexes, and so much more. You'll get a healthy dose of aught-based nostalgia on this ep. And, we finally answer the most important question in our community: is nipple confidence a thing? Plus, find out why raccoons are homophobic! Also, Melody reveals her coveted prize from the Dyke March raffle. Finally, we end by giving some advice we RARELY give.

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    Queer Porn w/ Nikki Hearts - Ep 187 Jun 08, 2021

    Make sure your parents are out of the house, and don't forget to clear the cache, because we're dyking out with adult performer and director Nikki Hearts about Queer Porn! Nikki tells us about their journey in the adult entertainment industry, and how much things have changed for the better in the past few years. We talk about why there's so much bad porn, how to find ethical porn, and what porn genre we might be sleeping on. Plus, Nikki tells us about the new direction of their company, changing it's name, and living more authentically. And if that's not enough, they also give us a peek behind the squirtin' curtain. Also, you'll learn why Melody grew up watching the same porn as her dad. Finally, Nikki sticks around to help us with a listener question about shattered confidence in the bedroom.

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    Relationship Escalator w/ Nicole Pacent - Ep. 186 Jun 01, 2021

    Are you riding the relationship escalator? Maybe you are and don't even know it! Actor, Writer, Podcaster, and Educator Nicole Pacent (Coming Out with Lauren and Nicole) joins us to talk about how we consciously, and subconsciously, model our relationships based on the escalator model. How does media and society shape our thinking around what makes a successful relationship? Why aren't monogamous couples communicating the terms of their relationships like many polyamorous couples? What is the goal in any relationship? We explore these questions and many more on this thoughtful episode about love, happiness, and dying alone. Plus, Melody reveals the new competitive sport she's taken up, while Carolyn embraces her inner hippie. Finally, we end on a question from a listener who has found her "person," even though that person perhaps doesn't want to be found.

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    Lesbian Tastemakers w/ Diana Souhami - Ep. 184 May 25, 2021

    It's our most charming episode yet! That's because author and celebrated biographer Diana Souhami (No Modernism Without Lesbians) joins us from the English countryside to dyke out about the lesbians who were critical to the modernist movement. Diana tells us all about the lives, lovers, and accomplishments of these tastemakers who eschewed the patriarchy and pursued their passions. And it's juicy. We also discuss issues of identity, and how it's both changed and remained the same over the past century. There's so much to learn from these influential dykes, but there's just as much to learn from our guest who writes about them. Enjoy all of the wisdom Diana offers up in this episode, from woodpecker talk to QUILTBAGs, and so much more. Plus, we reveal our gayest our of town experiences. And finally, Carolyn lets RHONY influence the way she answers this week's listener's question. You don't like it? Blame Melody.

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    Love Addiction w/ Rivkah Reyes - Ep. 185 May 25, 2021

    Might as well face it you're addicted to (things that actually aren't but can sometimes trick you into thinking it's) love! Actor/Musician/Comedian/Writer/Reader Rivkah Reyes joins us to dyke out about their recovery and journey to being spiritually healthy. After years of struggling with substance abuse, they realized that there were other addictive behaviors that were more dangerous to their health and wellbeing. We talk about the different forms of love addiction and what it's like to navigate relationships once you're aware of it. There's so much great information and insight into mental health in this episode, and of course, laughs along the way. Riv also shares how their past as a child actor may have contributed to normalizing unhealthy behaviors. Plus, is Rivkah's 'gayest thing' THE gayest thing a guest has ever shared? Carolyn and Melody put in their best gay effort at the Dyke Cookout, but it doesn't even compare. Finally, we end with another really difficult question from a listener who has so big decisions ahead.

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    The Signs w/ Mackenzie Lansing - Ep. 183 May 11, 2021

    The English teacher you wanted to be bffs with, that cartoon you were strangely attracted to, the time you dabbled in witchcraft, the binder of hot women you carried around. When you look back, it all seems SO OBVIOUS that you were not straight. Or did it? Actor and writer Mackenzie Lansing (Mare of Easttown, The Deuce) joins us to talk about all the signs that should have let us know we were queer YEARS before we figured it out. Some signs are painfully obvious, while others are just part of growing up and figuring out who you are. So should we really beat ourselves up for not putting the puzzle together sooner? And whose to know when the puzzle is actually complete? We also sneak in a couple of questions about what it's like to act across from Kate Winslet. Plus, Carolyn and Melody share a gayest thing of the week. And as always, we end with a listener question from a young U-Hauler who wants to overshare with her parents.

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    Superhuman Strength w/ Alison Bechdel - Ep. 182 May 04, 2021

    Dykon Alison Bechdel (Fun Home, Dykes To Watch Out For) joins us to dyke out about her latest (and thoroughly entertaining) graphic novel, The Secret to Superhuman Strength. We talk about Alison's journey of self improvement through her relationships with fitness and people. But we couldn't just talk about exercise and self discovery. We also chatted about Cubby Hole, the patriarchy, the impact of the pandemic, and so much more. Plus, Melody finally feels vindicated after Carolyn indulges in her favorite TV show. Finally, we wrap things up with a life-changing listener question.

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    Reality Queers w/ Jess Rothschild - Ep. 181 Apr 27, 2021

    This episode is full of fighting, drama, and gossip. But don't worry, we're not the ones involved. We're dyking out about the queers (and wannabes) of reality TV with writer and podcaster Jess Rothschild (Hot Takes and Deep Dives). It's a pretty significant episode in that after the conversation, Carolyn FINALLY watched Real Housewives of New York. We talk about the origin of Jess's love of reality TV, our favorite personalities over the years, what it's like to meet them in person and more. We also discuss shows that have been inclusive of queer people and our hopes for future representation. Plus, Jess gives insight as to why people love to watch these shows that are often dismissed as trash TV. But before our reality deep dive, we talk about where Carolyn will be for Memorial Day weekend and what has Melody in tears this week. Finally, we end with a question from a listener wants to know if her friend's boyfriend is guilty by association.

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    Pride w/ Bri Giger - Ep. 180 Apr 20, 2021

    It's never too early to talk about our favorite week of the year (or is it?). That's why we have comedian and musician Bri Giger on to dyke out about all things PRIDE! What are the pros and cons of trying to hook up with someone at pride? When did we learn about the history? What were our first experiences attending pride? We dive into our love/hate relationship with the week that's supposed to be all about celebrating who we are. Plus, Melody proves that the romance is still alive in her relationship, while Carolyn fully commits to the lumberdyke lifestyle. Finally, we end with a question from a listener who is struggling to date in the pandemic. Be sure to check out our Patreon for all the hot goss and behind the scenes chit chat!

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    Shiva Baby w/ Emma Seligman - Ep. 179 Apr 13, 2021

    Bisexual representation is buzzing in this episode about the movie everyone's talking about (or should be talking about): Shiva Baby! Writer/Director Emma Seligman joins us to byke out about the themes of the film, including the complicated dynamics between queer women, the intersection of family and sexuality, and sugaring. In fact, Emma indulges Carolyn's many questions about the world of sugaring and its presence on college campuses. Also, are lesbian fight clubs a thing? Plus, Carolyn may have gone too far in angering Nashville's gay mafia, and Melody finally leaves her apartment only to encounter reasons to stay in her apartment. Finally, we end with a question from a listener who is afraid of passing on her negative feelings about men to her daughter.

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    Gay Nashville w/ Brooke Eden - Ep. 178 Apr 06, 2021

    Y'all ready for an episode that's a little bit country and a little bit queer? How about a lot of both? Country singer-songwriter Brooke Eden joins us to dyke out about Nashville's gay mafia and the changes on the country music scene. We had a blast learning about how her and her girlfriend got together, the struggles of keeping their relationship a secret, and best of all, the joy of openly living her truth. We also talked about what's changed since Chely Wright came out in 2010 and how Nashville (and it's music) is a lot gayer than people assume. Be sure to check out Brooke's latest singles and follow her to see what comes next! Plus, we chat about dykes who hike, vaccinations, and end with a listener question about confusing Canadians.

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    Feminism w/ Gabrielle Korn - Ep. 177 Mar 30, 2021

    Feminism often feels like a dirty loaded word, but regardless of your gender, it's impossible to ignore. Editor and journalist Gabrielle Korn (NYLON, NETFLIX) joins us to dyke out about her experience confronting feminism head on while working in women's media. We discuss the themes of her new book, Everybody Else Is Perfect, and how feminism will never work if we a) aren't being intersectional and inclusive and b) include everybody but ourselves. Also, how does being queer affect our approach to feminism? And how do we dismantle the patriarchy? Plus, we announce a slight change to the pod and share bad experiences with strangers. Finally, we end on a question from a listener who can't afford to move out of the place they share with their ex.

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    Queerplatonic w/ Rachel Scanlon & McKenzie Goodwin - Ep. 176 Mar 23, 2021

    Dyke worlds collide in this episode featuring Rachel Scanlon & McKenzie Goodwin from the Two Dykes and a Mic podcast. And with two sets of platonic co-hosts on hand, what better topic than exploring the world of queerplatonic relationships! How are queer friendships different? Is it possible to just be close friends with another queer person if you're attracted to their gender? Does having an abundance of queer friends make a difference? How do you maintain a close relationship and not catch feelings? Also, why won't Carolyn cuddle with Melody? Is it strange that Rachel and McKenzie are blocking sexual acts, or is it just another Tuesday? Plus, Carolyn indulges Melody's Huskies talk, but gets her back with TMI about hamster urine. Finally, we hear from a listener who is worried about regretting not playing the field before settling down.

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    Lesbian Aesthetic w/ Joanna Bradley - Ep. 175 Mar 16, 2021

    Madras shorts, Kangol hats, 'Menswear,' vests, bold blazers, purposefully bad dye jobs...the spectrum of style in our community is wide and varied. So what is the lesbian aesthetic? Writer and comedian Joanna Bradley (SNL, The Break with Michelle Wolf) reflects on her own style, and that of other queer women she's encountered over the years. Can you tell if someone is a lez just by looking at them? What's that thing that makes you see someone and think "they're on my team?" Are style choices just holdovers from previous decades, or are we just admiring the trends that came before us? Has our fashion always influenced the straights, or is TikTok making us mainstream? But first, Melody breaks down why Demi dodged a bullet, and Carolyn confesses her questionable lesbian fashion choice. Then again, isn't a utilitarian fashion choice the most lesbian of all? Finally, we end with a listener question that coincidently ties nicely into our banter about Demi's ex-fiance.

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    Gay 90s w/ Dana Piccoli - Ep. 174 Mar 09, 2021

    Put down that Delia's catalogue and tie your best flannel around your waist because we're dyking out about the Gay 90s with media maven Dana Piccoli (Queer Media Matters)! What is the women's soft rock, the riot grrrls, the gentle teen bop boys who reminded us of girls we crushed on? What exactly made the 90s so gay? Also, was the movie Foxfire kept hidden at Blockbuster for fear that it would turn an entire generation gay? Is Chasing Amy still annoying to watch? We answer as many of these questions as we can before mom picks up the phone and breaks our internet connection. Plus, Dana sells us on revisiting Showgirls now that we can watch it without having to buy tickets for Hackers before sneaking into the theater. Before we get to that schweet nostalgia convo, Carolyn reveals her gayest thing that MUST be kept hidden from Rosie. And, Melody may or may not have joined a cult. Finally, we end with a listener question that has us gushing. We hope you get jiggy with this episode. If not, you can talk to the hand.

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    Grilling w/ Julia Turshen - Ep. 173 Mar 02, 2021

    Weber? I hardly know her! Yes, it's the first week in March, but it's never too soon to talk about grilling! Especially when home chef and author Julia Turshen is on hand to discuss tips, tricks, and best practices for this cooking method that isn't inherently queer but sure feels queer. Julia answered all our burning questions like, what are the best things to grill? Do you need 'dad' jokes in your back pocket to be a grill master? Charcoal or propane? And why can't cis men stop flipping and poking things? Before firing up the grill convo, we learn about the L Word-inspired recipe in her latest cookbookSimply Julia (out now) and her other approachable (and delicious) recipes. Plus, Melody asks Carolyn to clear up her past stance on Joss Whedon (boooo!), we tell you how much we care about I Care A Lot, and take a second to dunk on Oreo. Finally, we answer a question from an in-the-closet listener who is wondering about timing.

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    Gay Paris w/ Mélissa Laveaux - Ep. 172 Feb 23, 2021

    What's 'The City Of Lights' like for les lesbians? Canadian singer-songwriter Mélissa Laveaux has spent the last 13 years living in gay ol' Paris and has some THOUGHTS. Mélissa takes us on a journey from her Canadian and Hatian roots, to her fatphobic immigration experience, to experiences with relationships and racism, and more. She pulls back the curtain on common misconceptions about French culture and life in the big city we love (despite our many critiques and questionable experiences). Plus, Carolyn and Melody blow off some steam after online attacks from Gen Z queers. And finally, we end with a question that digs up our past rebound trauma. Sending extra love this week to our Texan U-Haulers!

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    Bi-Pan Myths w/ Natasha Negovanlis - Ep. 171 Feb 16, 2021

    Hello Dykes and Bykes! We have a PANtastic episode with the one and only Natasha Negovanlis (Carmilla, Vanlis Presents) about the myths and misconceptions surrounding Bi and Pan identities. What are they, and why are they still so prevalent? Do Bi and Pan folks feel like they have to adjust their gender and sexuality performance based on who they're with? We ultimately resolve every single issue that Bi/Pan people face and do so in a record amount of time. We also might need to mail Natasha our Gay Champion Of The Week trophy, because her gayest thing takes the crown. But first, the review of The Word To Come you never knew you wanted. Plus, Carolyn accidentally invents a new term for her vag, and Melody rages against robocalls. Finally, we end with a questions from a listener whose roommate is making things weird.

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    Celesbian Gossip w/ Liza Dye - Ep. 170 Feb 09, 2021

    We're serving up sapphic scoops with comedian Liza Dye, all in the name of good, clean, and hopefully not mean, celesbian fun. When she's not writing for TV shows or being asked about her well-known, traumatic NYC experience, Liza runs a popular celesbian gossip insta account. We talk about why we love to know whose vaping courtside together, and how it's different than coverage of straight celebs. From Kenny to Cara to Queen Latifah, we shared our thoughts and theories. By the way, if you hear little whimpers in the background, those are from Liza's dogs and NOT Armie Hammer's next meal. Plus, our resident scam-lover got scammed, and Carolyn advances the gay agenda in corporate America. Finally, we wrap it up with a question from a listener who is having a rough time getting rough in bed.

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    Mother-Daughter Dykes w/ Barbara Gruska - Ep. 169 Feb 02, 2021

    What's it like to come out to your mom as gay when your mom is also gay? Drummer/singer/songwriter Barbara Gruska (The Belle Brigade) dykes out with us about having a Banana Republic lesbian for a mom. From going to gay bars together to having to hear her mom's thoughts on Sharon Stone, there are so many experiences that are unique to mother-daughter dykes. We were sure to ask all the questions Barb never wanted to think about and more! Speaking of Dyke moms, we review the new French film Two Of Us and speculate on upcoming releases. Plus, which queer icon is getting a divorce? And why is Carolyn happy about it? Finally, we end on a question from a Patron who has a question about popping the question.

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    Women Who Kill w/ Kai Choyce - Ep. 168 Jan 26, 2021

    Three comedians hop on a mic to talk about killing, but not the kind we strive to do in front of audiences. Comedian, writer, and podcaster Kai Choyce (Women Who Kill podcast) joins us to talk about the women who snap, retaliate, plot, vamp, or are straight up psycho. How do perceptions of murderers differ based on gender? Have we achieved murder parity? What are the signs you might be dating a murderer? Is it weird to have a favorite? Why are there two famous Australian lesbian vampire murder stories? Plus, Carolyn can't help but objectify the new first and second families, and Melody trades baby formula for allyship. We also chat about JoJo Siwa, Teenage Bounty Hunters, and the latest export from Bali. Finally, we end with a question from a listener who is banned from attending her girlfriend's family gatherings.

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    Sex Work w/ Irene Merrow - Ep. 167 Jan 19, 2021

    According to Irene Merrow (Betches, Vice), sex work is a lot like comedy. And as someone who performs both, she would know! Learn all about the struggle of being a sex worker during a pandemic and the reality of trying to earn a living on OnlyFans. We also talk about the misguided policies that put sex workers out of work and in danger's way. Plus, you'll learn about Melody's new career ambitions that she shares for the first time. Will she join the ranks of funny queer ladies with a NSFW camera roll? Before we get to the sexy stuff, we gush about the new Netflix series featuring the most dykonic New Yorker that we can't get enough of. And, Carolyn checks in with Melody to make sure she doesn't risk getting red-pilled. Finally, we end with a listener question that might spawn ten related listener questions. But we read it anyway because we love our U-Haulers and want you to get out of your heads and into your beds.

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    Dyke Bars w/ Jo McDaniel - Ep. 166 Jan 12, 2021

    Believe it or not, we can't talk enough about saving our dyke space. And not even an attempted coup by domestic terrorists can stop us. Jo McDaniel, who runs A League of Her Own in Washington D.C., joins us to share what makes these spaces different than any other space. Jo has a long history of bartending and working in queer spaces in D.C.. From hiring femme security staff to conducting hand checks to mandatory consent, you'll learn the ins, outs, and challenges of creating a true safe space for our community. We seriously cannot wait (though we will) to visit ALOHO, but for now, join us in supporting this GAYMAZING space by signing up for virtual events, buying sweet merch, and more!

    Plus, Melody gathers intel from scary websites, and Carolyn sounds like a straight girl...sort of. Finally, we end with a fun AITA-type listener question, which we would LOVE more of.

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    Lesbian Fun w/ Casey Jane Ellison - Ep. 165 Jan 05, 2021

    Dykes just wanna have fun, and here to tell us all about it is herlarious comedian, performer, and artist Casey Jane Ellison! It's hard to put into words what makes being a lesbian so dang fun, but that didn't stop us from trying! Is it the sex? The freedom from the male gaze? Underwater waterfalls? THE SEX? Is every commercial featuring a person slo-mo running through a field just an ad for lesbianism? Maybe it is, MAYBE IT IS, Plus, Carolyn and Melody reluctantly make New Year's Resolutions, including a pledge that gets off to a Rosie- er...ROCKY start. Finally, we end with a questions from a listener who is nervous about upcoming physical changes in their partner. Happy New Year!!!

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    Breasts w/ Michelle Badillo - Ep. 164 Dec 30, 2020

    Breasts, boobs, boobies, knockers, tits, titters, titties, honkers, hooters, melons, jugs, tatas - whatever you call them, we're dyking out about them with the crazy talented and boobacious Michelle Badillo (One Day At A Time, Vida, The Bold Type). Michelle and Melody bond over the trauma and triumphs of having large breasts, while Carolyn struggles to relate to their shared nipple experiences. Whether they're big, small, or in between, are we all doomed to feel like we can't win with them? Or even without them? Plus, we geek out over Michelle's amazing career that's just getting started. And, we reflect on this Jenny Schecter of a year. You'll also find out if your hosts survived the holidays, are how much PDA they forced on their family members. Finally, we wrap it up with the perfect chaotic question to end this chaotic year.

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    Happiest Season w/ Erica Rose - Ep. 163 Dec 22, 2020

    Happy holiGAYS! Due to popular demand, we're releasing our Patreon off-topic episode featuring past guest, filmmaker Erica Rose - sandwiched between new content of course. We love Erica's opinions and takes on film, and she did not disappoint with her analysis of Hulu's Happiest Season. Why did this movie stir up so many feelings and so much debate in the community? Why are the reactions so varied? Why is Harper...there? We dive deep and explore all the things it could have been, while appreciating the good things that came with it. Besides the coats and blazers. Okay...maybe just the coats and blazers. No really, some of us (Carolyn) enjoyed it more than others (Melody & Erica), and that's OKAY. The important thing is that we're talking about it, right? And by "it" we mean Aubrey Plaza. PLUS, Melody talks about the Iranian holiday that gets overshadowed by Festivus. Carolyn shares the story of her NYC send-off that almost involved a crime scene. Also, #TwoDinkies. Finally, we end with an appropriate listener question given the topic for the week. Dyke those halls as safely as you can manage!

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    Boxing w/ Klea Blackhurst - Ep. 162 Dec 15, 2020

    Ding ding ding! We're dyking out with singer and actor Klea Blackhurst about Boxing! Klea performs at the most legendary venues in New York City, but when she's not channeling her inner Ethel Merman, she's shadowboxing as The Belter! But how does one overcome the huge intimidation factor to get into boxing? What's it like to train with the pros? What are some of the big misconceptions about it? We also talk about life in the city with our performance spaces closed for nearly a year, and how we're adjusting. Plus, Carolyn goes against Melody's wishes and talks about The Prom. And, Melody gets called out for being a creep at her local bodega. Finally, we end with a serious listener question that requires expertise that one of our co-hosts happens to have!

    -Get extra content (Like our Happiest Season review with Erica Rose and Queer Questions with Mara Wilson), Ad Free episodes, support the pod, and get to know other listeners by joining our Patreon community. We use the money for equipment, studio rentals, editing, mixing, travel for live shows (when those are a thing again), and more!

    If you can't support the pod on a monthly basis, please consider tipping us through Paypal or purchasing 1-on-1s and cameos through Jemi. We truly appreciate it!

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    Musicals w/ Mara Wilson - Ep. 161 Dec 08, 2020

    Come on babe, why don't we dyke out about musicals with the OG book witch, Mara Wilson (Matilda, Welcome To Night Vale)! Though good queer representation is sparse in Broadway's history, we've mastered the art of relating to the gentle lads who softly pine over women. Or the leading ladies with short haircuts who made us feel weird inside before we realized why. Mara shares her early memories of musical theater that led to a lifelong admiration of the art form. We also talk about crushes, past and present, including the one that so many queer women have on Mara's former co-star. And before we get into our topic, Carolyn and Melody give a VERY detailed review of Ammonite, including key time stamps. Plus, Hotmessbian hotties, Elliot Page, a simple plea to our listeners, and more! Finally, we end with a question about a lingering ex.

    -Get extra content (Like our Happiest Season review with Erica Rose and Queer Questions with Mara Wilson), Ad Free episodes, support the pod, and get to know other listeners by joining our Patreon community. We use the money for equipment, studio rentals, editing, mixing, travel for live shows (when those are a thing again), and more!

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    But I'm A Cheerleader w/ Jamie Babbit - Ep. 160 Dec 01, 2020

    This episode is a Dyke dream come true because we get to spend an hour talking to DYKON Jamie Babbit about one of the most iconic gay films of all time just before it's big re-release! But I'm A Cheerleader is truly the gift that keeps on giving, and we get to hear from Jamie how it all came together, what it's like to look back on it, and what has changed since its 1999 release. We ask all our burning questions about Natasha Lyonne and Clea Duvall, and the answers do not disappoint. Look our for the director's cut this December 8 with added scenes and all sorts of fun extras. Plus, we tease our take on Happiest Season, Melody reveals she's a marketing mastermind, and Carolyn officially becomes a homeowner/homo-owner. Be sure to keep an eye out on our Patreon this week for the comprehensive Happiest Season review with past guest Erica Rose. And finally, we wrap it up with a question from a sexually frustrated listener.

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    Community w/ Kristen Kaza - Ep. 159 Nov 24, 2020

    We all want it, we all need it, but sometimes, we're not quite sure how to find it. That's why people like Kristen Kaza dedicate their lives to building community through events and creating "brave spaces" for LGBTQIA folks. Kristen is the party guru, event planner, and activist behind Reunion Chicago, Chicago’s beloved queer dance party Slo 'Mo, and more. She has worked on holding space and building events and gatherings where the LGBTQIA community can connect with, enjoy, and sometimes, challenge each other. We talk about how our communities are changing, and how COVID has shifted the way we connect. Plus, Melody implores our listeners to shed light on the Beaver festival, while Carolyn attempts to save her queer cred by binging gay movies. Finally, we answer a question from a baby gay with an adorable crush.

    -Get extra content, Ad Free episodes, support the pod, and get to know other listeners by joining our Patreon community. We use the money for equipment, studio rentals, editing, mixing, travel for live shows (when those are a thing again), and more!

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    Intersex w/ Maria Tridas - Ep. 158 Nov 17, 2020

    We're shining a much needed spotlight on the "I" in LGBTQIA with video producer/host and intersex activist Maria Tridas! Being intersex is about as common as being a natural redhead, so why is being intersex treated as a rare anomaly instead of a naturally occurring biological variation? How has our understanding of being intersex changed over the years, and how can we be better allies? What do many intersex people not even know that they're intersex? We cover these questions and much more. Please note: Although Maria is very comfortable discussing details about their body, not all intersex individuals feel the same. This is a very personal and individual topic. Please do not assume that intersex, NB, trans folks want to or should discuss details of their bodies.

    We also talk about Melody's trip down South to see her family, make a case for gay athletes to hook up with each other, and talk up the amazing lineup for our fundraiser to save the lesbian bars! Finally, we answer a question from a listener who is considering one night stands now that her relationship has "restructured."

    Maria's them. piece

    Emily Quinn intersex Ted Talk

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    Rec Leagues w/ Lindsay Boling - Ep. 157 Nov 10, 2020

    It's not about whether you win or lose, it's about finding a girlfriend while you're playing the game! At least that's the dream on this episode about Rec Leagues with comedian and former Division I soccer player Lindsay Boling (NY Comedy Festival). Not a rec league person? Well you're in luck, because we recorded this episode during election week. No, that doesn't mean we talked about politics instead of our topic. It means we were drinking, so it only took so long before the conversation about team sports turned into reminiscing about MySpace and emo bands. Also, for a week filled with doom scrolling/refreshing, it managed to be VERY gay. Finally, we end with a listener question about journaling which made Melody's day!

    -Get extra content (like out chat about Bly Manor or Queer Questions with Lindsay Boling), Ad Free episodes, support the pod, and get to know other listeners by joining our Patreon community. We use the money for equipment, studio rentals, editing, mixing, travel for live shows (when those are a thing again), and more!

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    Halloween w/ A Ghost - Ep. 156 Nov 03, 2020

    It might sound like it's just Carolyn and Melody on this haunting episode, but there's totally a ghost there. You just have to have "a gift" to hear it. Don't believe us? Then how else would you explain the unfortunate series of events that led to us having to can an awesome interview with one of our favorite comedians? Bad audio? Not on our watch 2020! (Okay...maybe on our watch...). We're dyking out about our favorite holiday, what makes it queer, and how we like to celebrate it. Plus, you'll get the play-by-play of the Zoom Halloween party that Melody and Ali threw. And if that's not enough, we spill all the stinkin' details of our first official podcast co-host reunion since March. Finally, we give boo-tiful advice to a listener who is pining over their pandemic crush.

    -Get extra content (like out chat about Bly Manor!), support the pod, and get to know other listeners by joining our Patreon community. We use the money for equipment, studio rentals, editing, mixing, travel for live shows (when those are a thing again), and more! If you can't support the pod on a monthly basis, please consider tipping us through Paypal. We truly appreciate it!

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    Getting Knocked Up w/ Mo Welch - Ep. 155 Oct 27, 2020

    We hope you're expecting a lot of laughs this episode, because we plan to deliver. Comedian Mo Welch (Blair, Conan) joins us to dyke out about her journey to making a baby! Come for the conversation around what it's like to be gay while trying to get pregnant, and stay for the crazy story of Mo's first trip to NYC with one Ali Clayton. It involves Cubby Hole, Ricki Lake, and so much more. But back to the baby thing... How do lesbians get sperm? How do you decide who carries? Does realizing your gay affect your desire to have children? Plus, we give our official U-Hauloween recap, and Melody talks about a traumatic massage that was anything but (or BUTT?) relaxing. Finally, we end with a question from a listener who is worried that the woman they're seeing might have a much higher sex drive.

    Do you have a voting plan?

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    Sapphic Horror w/ Emily M. Danforth - Ep. 154 Oct 20, 2020

    No trick and all treat, author emily m. danforth (Plain Bad Heroines, The Miseducation of Cameron Post) joins us this week to dyke out about all things sapphic and spooky. Why do "final girls" code as queer? Are queers more drawn to the horror genre in their youth? What scares us the most? Why is Melody so afraid of bees???? Plus, Emily gives us the scoop on her latest novel full of gothic mischief and oh-so-gay. We also talk about our costumes from U-Hauloween and learn more about how Ali's mom tries to be an Ali. Finally, we end with a question from a listener who is frustrated by her dating life after moving to a more urban area.

    Here's a partial list of movies and books referenced in this conversation:

    Scream

    Halloween

    Watcher in the woods

    The Town that Dreaded Sundown

    It

    Halloween

    The Haunting of Hill House

    The Haunting of Bly Manor

    Annihilation

    Jennifer's Body

    Gideon the Ninth by Tamsyn Muir,

    Her Body and Other Parties by Carmen Maria Machado

    A Line In The Dar by Melinda Lowes

    The Return by Rachel Harrison

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    Love w/ Amy Ordman & Jack Dodge - Ep. 153 Oct 13, 2020

    We say love is love, but how much do we really know about love? Youtuber Amy Ordman and her Dating Straight podcast co-host Jack Dodge join us to dyke about that thing that makes existing in this world a little sweeter. Is there a shared understanding of love? How do you know if you are in love? Is it weird to not want to be in love? Is being in love worth the pain that comes with it? We rack our brains trying to answer these questions and more. Plus, Melody takes a trip to Lake Desolation and lives to tell us about it. And, Carolyn makes a dyketastic discovery about the house she's trying to buy. Finally, we end with a question from a listener who expected more from her first intimate experiences with another woman.

    Get your tickets to U-Hauloween before they sell out!

    Do you have a voting plan?

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    Dating Your Ex w/ Samantha Ruddy - Ep. 152 Oct 06, 2020

    Have you ever gotten back together with an ex after breaking up? If so, then you'll relate to Comedian Samantha Ruddy (Full Frontal with Samantha Bee) who joins us to dyke out about her experience with dating her ex! We're here, we're queer, and our breakups are messy. Sometimes, they don't even feel like a real breakup. Sometimes, you still sleep in the same bed. So how do you navigate giving things another chance with someone who has broken your heart? Is it possible to forgive and forget? Can time apart help you come together stronger? Only time (and a shit ton of emotionally vulnerable conversations) can tell! Plus, we talk about why we'd rather be in New Zealand, an unconventional mask wearing policy, and proper maintenance of our "tools of the trade." Finally, we end with a question about a fiancée who is dragging her feet on wedding planning.

    Do you have a voting plan?

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    Apologies w/ Tien Tran - Ep. 151 Sep 29, 2020

    We beg your pardon, express our deepest regrets, and hope you can forgive us for this week's episode. Comedian and writer Tien Tran (Work In Progress) thought long an hard about it, and ultimately decided to come forward and dyke out about apologies. Apologies in general and specific ones *cough* ELLEN *cough.* Why do most apologies fall short? Do women apologize too much or are we just displaying empathy? Is there too much apologizing in same-sex relationships? Should you apologize for this shitty things you did in high school if those days are long behind you? Also, Tien shares a story about an UNFORGIVABLE thing her sister did in the past, and Melody gives Carolyn ideas on how to gay up her yogurt game. Finally, we end with a listener question about what to do with sex toys when a relationship ends. Do you forgive us?

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    Shame w/ Lisa Haas - Ep. 150 Sep 22, 2020

    What does Dame Judy Dench have to do with queer shame? Actor and writer Lisa Haas (Wild Nights with Emily) joins us to get to the bottom of the shame we feel around our queer identities. While we're filled with gay pride, they're no denying that shame plays a big role in shaping our feelings around sexuality as we grow up. And perhaps even to this day! We reflect on our early memories of feeling shame and bully Melody into searching her repressed feelings to relate. Plus, we give our thoughts on Ratched and talk about our respectively terrible weeks. Lastly, we end on a question from a listener who is unhappy with her therapist.

    The Legacy of Audre Lorde - piece mentioned in the episode

    Do you have a voting plan?

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    PC Culture w/ Judy Gold - Ep. 149 Sep 15, 2020

    Political correctness can be a great thing when it comes to treating people with respect and dignity, but can it go to far? Comedy legend Judy Gold joins us to talk about how PC Culture has been weaponized against comedians, and why that hurts us all. Judy unleashes her frustration about the current state of the country, and rightfully so. But more importantly, she points out the hypocrisy in the standards at which we hold comedians to, when our leaders do far worse with little to no consequences. We discuss her latest book, Yes, I Can Say That, which dives into the role of comedians as truth tellers, the history of pushing the envelope, and why people get upset when they toe or cross the line. Plus, we talk about IRL interactions with listeners, a new, hot celesbian pairing, and what Monica Lewinsky's choice of car says about her sexuality. Finally, we end with a question from a listener who is worried about her sexual inexperience with women.

    If you want to hear Carolyn and Melody dive in deeper on this topic, make sure you join our Patreon, where you'll find a bonus episode filled with their most offensive jokes, She-Ra drama, angry listener comments, and more!

    -Get extra content, support the pod and get to know other listeners by joining our Patreon community. We use the money for equipment, studio rentals, editing, mixing, travel for live shows (when those are a thing again), and more! If you can't support the pod on a monthly basis, please consider tipping us through Paypal. We truly appreciate it!

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    Non-Binary w/ Gara Lonning - Ep. 148 Sep 08, 2020

    We're going outside the binary this week to discuss an identity that an increasing number of folks in the LGBTQ+ community are embracing. Comedian and performance artist Gara Lonning (We're Having Gay Sex) joins us to explain to Carolyn's mom (sort of) what it means to be non-binary. We dyke out about common misconceptions and the intersection with trans identity. Also, how do you talk to family about it? What should you do if you accidentally misgender someone? And, why should you never ask an enby friend for a "pass?" Plus, we introduce a political conspiracy theory that is probably, totally true, and Gara reveals their true thoughts on the term "nibling." And while we're able to have an interesting and fun conversation about gender amongst cis and trans-identifying dykes, we expose an area with a much larger gap in common ground: Gen-Z vs Millennial celebrity cultural references. Finally, we end on a listener question about how to handle homophobic comments in the workplace.

    -Want to hear more from our chat with Gara? Get extra content, support the pod and get to know other listeners by joining our Patreon community. We use the money for equipment, studio rentals, editing, mixing, travel for live shows (when those are a thing again), and more! If you can't support the pod on a monthly basis, please consider tipping us through Paypal. We truly appreciate it!

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    Gay Immersion w/ Cara Connors - Ep. 147 Sep 01, 2020

    Get your workbooks out and agendas ready because this week, we're dyking out with comedian Cara Connors (Just For Laughs, E!) about her gay immersion! How does one go from being married to a man to indulging in a gay Rumspringa? Pretty seamlessly, actually. Aside from dating as many women as humanly possible, what else do you do when you're first coming out of the closet to familiarize yourself with queer culture? What if you've always been immersed in gayness and just didn't realize it? Before we dive into the topic, we talk about the Annomite trailer, but only because it's our contractual obligation. Also, Carolyn shows off her talent for guessing exactly the kind of car you buy based on your queer vibe. Finally, we end with a listener question about deflecting rude questions from neighbors. Please note, if you're a Pisces who has a problem with the things said in this episode, please take it up directly with Cara. (Sorry Cara!)

    -Support the pod and get to know other listeners by joining our Patreon community. We use the money for equipment, studio rentals, editing, mixing, travel for live shows (when those are a thing again), and more! If you can't support the pod on a monthly basis, please consider tipping us through Paypal. We truly appreciate it!

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    Solo Polyamory w/ Ashley Ray - Ep. 146 Aug 25, 2020

    If monogamy isn't for you, you never want to merge bank accounts with someone, but you're got a lot of love to give (and hope to receive it back), then perhaps solo polyamory is right for you! Comedian and writer Ashley Ray has been living that solo polyamory life (in a pandemic no less!) and joins us to correct common misconceptions about her love life. We talk about the funny and tragic red flags she sifts through when dating, how people react to her relationship structure, and why structure and communication are so important. Plus, she talks about her wild zodiac dating experiment which we hope gets made into a TV show. This episode just may leave you polycurious! Plus, Carolyn and Melody talk about Real Housewives of Beverly Hills, The DNC, The Chicks, and our polar opposite gayest things of the week! Finally, we end with a question from a listener who seems to be the victim of an emotional terrorist.

    -Support the pod and get to know other listeners by joining our Patreon community. We use the money for equipment, studio rentals, editing, mixing, travel for live shows (when those are a thing again), and more! If you can't support the pod on a monthly basis, please consider tipping us through Paypal. We truly appreciate it!

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    Tea w/ Jen Richards - Ep. 145 Aug 18, 2020

    Put on the kettle, because the incredible and talented Jen Richards (Netflix's Disclosure, HBO's Mrs. Fletcher, Emmy-nominated Her Story) joins us this week to talk about the beverage that dates back to 2732 B.C.: Tea! Jen is a writer, actress, and activist whose morning routine involves brewing some tea with her own special touches to complement her mood. We talk about how we were introduced to tea, why it's inherently queer, and the different times and places we've enjoyed it. If your not into tea, you might feel your curiosity brewing as we dyke out about this versatile and comforting beverage. Plus, Jen gives us the scoop on her recent engagement, and tells us what she's been up to in quarantine. But before tea time, we talk about the outdoor comedy crackdown, the attacks on Kamala Harris, Carolyn's big "gayest thing" moment, and the one topic that Carolyn promised to never talk about again. And, we finally reveal the new name for our listeners!

    -Support the pod and get to know other listeners by joining our Patreon community. We use the money for equipment, studio rentals, editing, mixing, travel for live shows (when those are a thing again), and more! If you can't support the pod on a monthly basis, please consider tipping us through Paypal. We truly appreciate it!

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    Healing w/ Chemda - Ep. 144 Aug 11, 2020

    When life tests us through heartbreak or tragedy, we have to find ways to heal our wounds and move forward. And if anyone knows this, it's Chemda (Keith and The Girl) who dykes out with us about her journey from straight-ish girl, to queer relationship, to heartache - both literal and figurative. Love, loss, and living have helped her find ways to cope with the crazy things life throws her way. We also talk about her relationship with the queer community now that she is divorced from her trans husband. And we answer the age old question of "should you be friends with your ex" once and for all (yeah right). Plus, Carolyn talks about all the lesbian things she did in the woods, and yet Melody still manages to out-gay her. Finally, we give TOO MUCH advice to our listener who sent in a question about her desire to hookup with men.

    -Support the pod and get to know other listeners by joining our Patreon community. We use the money for equipment, studio rentals, editing, mixing, travel for live shows (when those are a thing again), and more! If you can't support the pod on a monthly basis, please consider tipping us through Paypal. We truly appreciate it!

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    Labels w/ Becca Blackwell - Ep. 143 Aug 04, 2020

    This episode is everything and nothing, because that's where we always end up when discussing labels. But to us, it's actually everything because we're dyking out with the hilarious and entertaining Becca Blackwell (High Maintenance on HBO)! We talk about their gender and sexuality journey, as well as their relationship to labels throughout their life. What happens when we hold individual definitions for shared labels? Is it okay to disagree about what they mean? What are the spaces we create for our identities and who can occupy them? Can a trans masc person still be a dyke? (ABSOLUTELY). Plus, we talk about the thing many of you have been asking us to talk about, even though we have previously sworn off talking about it/her/spoiler-alert-it's-Taylor-Swift. And, Melody may have finally gotten Carolyn hooked on Real Housewives drama. Finally, we end with a listener question about dealing with misogynistic gatekeepers.

    Here is the link to Becca's band, Inner Princess!

    -Hear more from Becca and other past guests by joining our Patreon community. We use the money for equipment, studio rentals, editing, mixing, travel for live shows, and more! If you can't support the pod on a monthly basis, please consider tipping us through Paypal. We truly appreciate it!

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    Sex Parties w/ Fatimah Asghar - Ep. 142 Jul 28, 2020

    It's a sex party (chat), and you're invited (to listen)! Poet and filmmaker Fatimah Asghar (Brown Girls, NPR, PBS) joins us to dyke out about sex parties, which inspired her latest short film Got Game. First, apologies for the guest audio. It was the best we could get given the circumstances, but it's such a great conversation that we hope you won't mind. Where were we? Oh yes, sex parties! We talk less about the actual sex (lame) and more about trying to make a connection and what these interactions can tell us about ourselves. Plus, we talk about the importance of consent and the steps we can take to make these spaces as safe as possible. Before we get to our topic, we talk about our gayest thing of the week, and Los Angeles' gayest thing of the year! Finally, we end with a question from a frustrated listener whose girlfriend won't send nudes.


    -Check out our extra, exclusive content by joining our Patreon community or becoming a member on Himalaya. We use the money for equipment, studio rentals, editing, mixing, travel for live shows, and more! If you can't support the pod on a monthly basis, please consider tipping us through Paypal. We truly appreciate it!

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    Dating w/ Alysia Brown - Ep. 141 Jul 21, 2020

    A dating episode in the midst of a global pandemic? If anyone can still have game when the world feels upside down, it's comedian Alysia Brown. From back-to-back dates to picking up audience members on Zoom shows and everything in between, Alysia does it all. She tells us about her dating life before COVID, during quarantine, and what she hopes to find for the future. We implore her to share her tips and go-to moves so that our listeners can learn from her experience. Plus, Melody tries to cheat with her pick for Gayest Thing Of The Week while Carolyn is on her way to becoming a Bernie Sanders meme. Finally, we end with a question from a listener who is questioning her sexuality, but afraid of leading on another woman in case it turns out she isn't queer after all.

    -Want to hear more from Alysia? Check out our extra, exclusive content by joining our Patreon community or becoming a member on Himalaya. We use the money for equipment, studio rentals, editing, mixing, travel for live shows, and more! If you can't support the pod on a monthly basis, please consider tipping us through Paypal. We truly appreciate it!

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    Lilith Fair w/ Thao Nguyen - Ep. 140 Jul 14, 2020

    Want an episode that truly lives up to the podcast's name? Because we're dyking out with singer-songwriter Thao Nguyen (Thao & The Get Down Stay Down) about Lilith Fair, and that might be as gay as it gets! But first, Carolyn and Melody mourn the loss of Naya Rivera and talk about what her performance on Glee meant to them. And Melody lets us all know what a Byke is, thanks to a wonderful listener. Then we get to the good stuff. Thao opens up about how her latest album Temple coincides with both her marriage and coming out publicly. This naturally leads into a nostalgia and joke-filled conversation about Lilith Fair - the famed women's music festival that thrived from 1997-1999, and failed in its 2010 revival. We also get the scoop on how her brilliant Zoom music video for Phenom came together in quarantine. Finally, we end with a listener question about being queer in high school in conservative areas.


    -Want to hear more from Thao? Check out our extra, exclusive content by joining our Patreon community or becoming a member on Himalaya. We use the money for equipment, studio rentals, editing, mixing, travel for live shows, and more! If you can't support the pod on a monthly basis, please consider tipping us through Paypal. We truly appreciate it!

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    Equity w/ Rachael Rapinoe - Ep. 139 Jul 07, 2020

    Let's level the playing field by striving for equity both on and off the field (or court, or rink, or office flooring, etc). Rachael Rapinoe joins us this week to talk about how she's working to create equity in the CBD/Cannabis industry. Before she co-founded her company Mendi, she was a professional soccer player who was all too familiar with the disparity in income and playing conditions between men and women. And as you can imagine, the gap can be even bigger for the LGBTQ community and POC. We dyke out about how her background as an athlete informs her decision-making as a business owner in a fairly young industry, and the different ways her sister Megan uses her own platform to fight for equity. But first, it's TikTok O'Clock at the start of the episode. Carolyn and Melody age themselves by talking about their favorite social media fascination. Plus, Melody can't stop thinking about last week's gayest thing. Finally, we end with a listener question about Harry Potter fandom in light of JK Rowling's transphobia which leads to a longer discussion.

    -Want to hear more about Rachael's opinions on queer culture and where to meet women in Portland? Check out our extra, exclusive content by joining our Patreon community or becoming a member on Himalaya. We use the money for equipment, studio rentals, editing, mixing, travel for live shows, and more! If you can't support the pod on a monthly basis, please consider tipping us through Paypal. We truly appreciate it!

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    Keeping It Real w/ Erika Owens - Ep. 138 Jun 30, 2020

    We're dyking out across the world with photographer Erika Owens, who many of you know from the latest season of TLC's 90 Day Fiancé: Before The 90 Days. Erika stands out on the show for quite a few reasons. She's part of the first queer pairing on the show, she's super fun and likable, and she has bright, bold, head-turning style. We talked about what it was like coming out on TV and having her relationship drama play out in such a public manner. She also dykes out about what it's like to be queer in a small town, and what inspires her work and style. But before getting into the interview, Carolyn and Melody recap their Priding Out show and give an update on some dramatic developments that unfolded during the show. Plus, we reveal (or should we say 'release') our gayest thing of the week. Finally, w end on a listener question about finding other queer women in the midwest.

    -Check out our extra, exclusive content by joining our Patreon community or becoming a member on Himalaya. We use the money for equipment, studio rentals, editing, mixing, travel for live shows, and more! If you can't support the pod on a monthly basis, please consider tipping us through Paypal. We truly appreciate it!

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    Self Love w/ Jerrell Tate - Ep. 137 Jun 23, 2020

    We could all use a little more self love, especially this pride month. That's why we're dyking out with the very funny and wonderful Jerrell Tate from the MinoriTEA Report podcast. Jerrell, like many in our community, had a long road to self-acceptance and appreciating what makes him different. We talk about how hard it can be to treat ourselves with the kindness that we more easily show to others. And we manage to age ourselves by sharing our personal methods of showing ourselves love and kindness. Plus, our Gayest Thing Of The Week has now officially become a competition with a prize of sorts! Finally, we end with a question from a listener who is afraid that her sexuality will cause her to lose her parent's support and derail her dream of becoming a Rockette.

    -GET TICKETS to our virtual pride show that's happening this Thursday, June 25 at 8pm EST.

    -Check out extra, exclusive content by joining our Patreon community or becoming a member on Himalaya. We use the money for equipment, studio rentals, editing, mixing, travel for live shows, and more! If you can't support the pod on a monthly basis, please consider tipping us through Paypal. We truly appreciate it!

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    Loud & Proud w/ Molly Kearney - Ep. 136 Jun 16, 2020

    We're in the thick of Pride month and cooked up this TREAT of an episode with the super funny and wonderful Molly Kearney (Comedy Central). Molly lives their life loud and proud, and they make it seem so fun and effortless. What is this beautiful butch dyke's origin story? What gay things is this double-cannon wielding comedian up to? How did they survive being the meat in a triple bunk bed sandwich? Where do they buy their suits? This episode delivers the laughs we all could use right now. Plus, Melody gives a mini history lesson on the infamous Riis beach, and Carolyn goes to Twitter jail for the first time ever. Finally, we end with a listener question about what to do when you and your fiancée don't see eye-to-eye about having children.

    -This episode is sponsored EveryPlate. Use code "out1" and pay only $3.99/meal on your first order. And also by Out & About CBD. Enter code DO25 for 25% off your purchase!

    If you're looking for places to donate to help in the fight for racial justice, here are some we like. Remember that this is going to be a long fight to see the changes that need to happen to end police brutality and change our criminal (in)justice system here in the US:

    DEFUND THE POLICE RESOURCE FROM MPD150

    NATIONAL RESOURCE LIST

    HOMELESS BLACK WOMEN TRANS FUND

    BLACK-LED LGBTQ ORGS

    GOFUNDME FOR BREONNA TAYLOR

    EMERGENCY RELEASE FUND

    -Check out an extra, exclusive Q&A with Lauren by joining our Patreon community or becoming a member on Himalaya. We use the money for equipment, studio rentals, editing, mixing, travel for live shows, and more! If you can't support the pod on a monthly basis, please consider tipping us through Paypal. We truly appreciate it!

    -For related content, follow us on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and Leave Us a Review if you like what you hear!

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    Bad Lesbian w/ Lauren Flans - Ep. 135 Jun 09, 2020

    Actor/Writer/Podcaster and self-proclaimed bad lesbian Lauren Flans (Coming Out Pod, Wild 'n Out) joins us to talk about all the ways in which we feel like we're failing our identity. Astrology? Bah humbug. Cats? Allergic. Friends? Mostly cishet dudes. But are these really pillars of lesbianism that we need to shame ourselves for not meeting, or are they dated generalizations that no longer apply? Plus, Carolyn and Melody dyke out about our duty to do all we can for racial justice at this pivotal moment, and as long as those injustices exist.

    -This episode is sponsored by Out & About CBD. Enter code DO25 for 25% off your purchase!

    If you're looking for places to donate to help in the fight for racial justice, here are some we like. Remember that this is going to be a long fight to see the changes that need to happen to end police brutality and change our criminal (in)justice system here in the US:

    DEFUND THE POLICE RESOURCE FROM MPD150

    NATIONAL RESOURCE LIST

    HOMELESS BLACK WOMEN TRANS FUND

    BLACK-LED LGBTQ ORGS

    GOFUNDME FOR BREONNA TAYLOR

    EMERGENCY RELEASE FUND

    -Check out an extra, exclusive Q&A with Lauren by joining our Patreon community or becoming a member on Himalaya. We use the money for equipment, studio rentals, editing, mixing, travel for live shows, and more! If you can't support the pod on a monthly basis, please consider tipping us through Paypal. We truly appreciate it!

    -For related content, follow us on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and Leave Us a Review if you like what you hear!

    -We've got new MERCH.

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    -Like our theme song by There Is No Mountain? Subscribe to our composer/mixer's youtube channel for more beats and mixes.

    Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    Fluidity w/ Mae Martin - Ep. 134 Jun 02, 2020

    Pride month is here! We wouldn't be where we are today if it wasn't for the brave Black and Brown trans women who rioted against police brutality. That brutality maybe have eased for the queer community (it's definitely still there), but as many of you know, it never let up for the Black communities in our country. There's no better way to celebrate pride than by participating in the fight for justice. There are many ways to get involved, and there is no excuse for sitting silent on the sidelines. Let's work together and make real, lasting change. #BlackLivesMatter

    Comedian/Writer/Actor and all-around queer darling Mae Martin joins us to dyke out about fluidity this week. You all know Mae from their show Feel Good (stream it on Netflix, Channel 4) and hilarious comedy. They often talk about gender and sexuality on stage, so we loved having the chance to dive in deeper into that conversation. We talk about the value of labels and how things are changing over time. Please stream Feel Good and check out Mae's book Can Everyone Please Calm Down.

    -This episode is sponsored by Out & About CBD. Enter code DO25 for 25% off your purchase!

    If you're looking for places to donate to help in the fight for racial justice, here are some we like. Remember that this is going to be a long fight to see the changes that need to happen to end police brutality and change our criminal (in)justice system here in the US:

    DEFUND THE POLICE RESOURCE FROM MPD150

    NATIONAL RESOURCE LIST

    HOMELESS BLACK WOMEN TRANS FUND

    BLACK-LED LGBTQ ORGS

    GOFUNDME FOR BREONNA TAYLOR

    EMERGENCY RELEASE FUND

    -Check out an extra, exclusive Q&A with Mae by joining our Patreon community or becoming a member on Himalaya. We use the money for equipment, studio rentals, editing, mixing, travel for live shows, and more! If you can't support the pod on a monthly basis, please consider tipping us through Paypal. We truly appreciate it!

    -For related content, follow us on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and Leave Us a Review if you like what you hear!

    -We've got new MERCH.

    -Have a question that you need answered ASAP? Check us out on WISIO.

    -Like our theme song by There Is No Mountain? Subscribe to our composer/mixer's youtube channel for more beats and mixes.

    Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

    Persianality w/ Desiree Akhavan - Ep. 133 May 26, 2020

    We're not Dyking Out with any ol' bisexual this week. We've got THE Bisexual, Desiree Akhavan! After hyping her work for years (Appropriate Behavior, The Miseducation of Cameron Post), we finally sit down and talk about her life as a Persian, queer filmmaker quarantined in Brooklyn. While Carolyn finds Desiree's work super relatable, Melody finds her whole life to be super relatable -perhaps TOO relatable. They talk about their experiences coming out while Persian and how they relate to their culture. We also talk about The Bisexual (stream it on Hulu) and the challenges queer shows and films face in attracting mainstream audiences. Before we get into all things Persianality, Melody and Carolyn introduce a new weekly segment and talk about cake. Finally, we end with a question from a listener who hasn't had sex with her partner in over a year.

    -For 50% off your first Care/of order, go to TakeCareOf.com and enter the code "dykingout50"

    -Get extra episodes by joining our Patreon community or becoming a member on Himalaya. We use the money for equipment, studio rentals, editing, mixing, travel for live shows, and more! If you can't support the pod on a monthly basis, please consider tipping us through Paypal. We truly appreciate it!

    -For related content, follow us on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and Leave Us a Review if you like what you hear!

    -We've got new MERCH.

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    She-Ra w/ ND Stevenson - Ep. 132 May 19, 2020

    Note; This interview was recorded and released pre ND's transitions which is why you'll hear a different name and pronouns used in the episode.

    Whether or not you've seen Netflix's She-Ra and the Princesses of Power, you'll want to hear from the person who made one of the queerest shows on TV. The extraordinarily talented ND Stevenson joins us to dyke out about creating and wrapping up a show that's full of heart, magic, and SO MUCH GAY. ND reimagined the 1980s cartoon to reflect a more inclusive world, and this final season is the best and queerest yet. We talked about his conservative upbringing and coming to terms with his sexuality, as well as how those experiences influence his work. Plus, Melody and Carolyn dish on their quarantine habits and the lesbians they're watching on Instagram. Finally, we end with a listener question from a 19-year-old about lesbian bed death.

    -Get extra episodes by joining our Patreon community or becoming a member on Himalaya. We use the money for equipment, studio rentals, editing, mixing, travel for live shows, and more! If you can't support the pod on a monthly basis, please consider tipping us through Paypal. We truly appreciate it!

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    Lesbian Memes w/ Hotmessbian - Ep. 131 May 12, 2020

    Can I has Lezbian memes? We're dyking out with queen of the queer memes, Cheyenne aka Hotmessbian! What is it about a picture with some relatable words that brings us together? Who even thinks up these things? We talk about Cheyenne's journey from casual meme consumer to having a following of over 100k meme-lovers. Plus, we talk (maybe too much) about Netflix's A Secret Love and the fate of a well-known celesbian couple. And per usual, we end with a question from a young Susan frustrated with the selection on dating apps.

    For 50% off your first Care/of order, go to TakeCareOf.com and enter the code "dykingout50"

    -Get extra episodes by joining our Patreon community or becoming a member on Himalaya. We use the money for equipment, studio rentals, editing, mixing, travel for live shows, and more! If you can't support the pod on a monthly basis, please consider tipping us through Paypal. We truly appreciate it!

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    Hobbies w/ Shantira Jackson - Ep. 130 May 05, 2020

    They're a great way to make friends, meet future girlfriends, and lately, help pass the time. Comedian and writer Shantira Jackson (Saved By The Bell, Busy Tonight) joins us to Dyke Out about hobbies! How have your hobbies changed from when you were a kid? Are some inherently more queer than others? Would you ever take up a hobby just to impress someone? Yeah, acoustic guitar dabblers, we're talking about you. We also chat about the shows we've been streaming, from pleasant British realty shows, to Reese Witherspoon playing the shit out of white women, to well-endowed men with dragon tattoos. Finally, we wrap it up with a question from a listener who can't find love on her Mediterranean island.

    For 50% off your first Care/of order, go to TakeCareOf.com and enter the code "dykingout50"

    -Get extra episodes by joining our Patreon community or becoming a member on Himalaya. We use the money for equipment, studio rentals, editing, mixing, travel for live shows, and more! If you can't support the pod on a monthly basis, please consider tipping us through Paypal. We truly appreciate it!

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    Trailblazing w/ Alice Wu - Ep. 129 Apr 28, 2020

    Filmmaker Alice Wu (Saving Face, The Half Of It) made two groundbreaking queer films 15 years apart, so we're dyking out with her this week to learn more about her journey from a practical child of immigrants, to a badass writer/director making authentic, queer movies. We talk about how Alice's quest to be true to herself and to her characters' stories has led to groundbreaking movies featuring characters and storylines we never get to see shine. The Half Of It comes out on Netflix May 1, so be sure to stream it! Put on a virtual watch party! Make a taco sausage! Plus, Carolyn and Melody talk (FOR THE LAST TIME OK) about a certain celesbian who can't stay out of the news, as well as Melody's latest reality TV obsession. And finally, we end with a question from a listener who describes themselves as 'toxic.'

    For 50% off your first Care/of order, go to TakeCareOf.com and enter the code "dykingout50"

    -Get extra episodes by joining our Patreon community or becoming a member on Himalaya. We use the money for equipment, studio rentals, editing, mixing, travel for live shows, and more! If you can't support the pod on a monthly basis, please consider tipping us through Paypal. We truly appreciate it!

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    Getting Outed w/ Ever Mainard - Ep. 128 Apr 21, 2020

    Coming out happens in all different ways, and hopefully it's on your own terms. But what happens when it's not? Comedian and actor Ever Mainard (The Feels, Conan's Meet The Staff) joins us to dyke out about her experience getting outed by her hometown paper. What are the pros and cons to being outed by others? Is it wrong to speculate about celebrities? Plus, we also talk about the battle of the Ellens (three of them!), parents killing backyard pests, bad yelp reviews, and more! Finally, we answer a listener question about whether or not it's okay to sleep with your ex's friend.


    For 50% off your first Care/of order, go to TakeCareOf.com and enter the code "dykingout50"

    -Get extra episodes by joining our Patreon community or becoming a member on Himalaya. We use the money for equipment, studio rentals, editing, mixing, travel for live shows, and more! If you can't support the pod on a monthly basis, please consider tipping us through Paypal. We truly appreciate it!

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    Electing Women w/ Jess McIntosh - Ep. 127 Apr 14, 2020

    We have more women in the current congress than ever before, but they still only make up 23.7%. Political commentator and strategist Jess McIntosh (SiriusXM Progress) joins us in these extraordinary times to dyke out about the challenges women politicians face in getting elected, and why it's important to have them in office. How did we go from such a diverse field of democratic candidates for president, including six women, to ending up with just another old white guy? (Note: We recorded the interview portion of this episode a few days before Bernie Sanders dropped out of the race.) Plus, Carolyn and Melody discuss how their lives as New York City comedians has drastically changed. Should they adapt to this new normal, or ride it out in hopes that things will go back to how they were - minus the handshakes. Finally, we end on a question from a listener who is struggling with knowing whether she is asexual or just hasn't met the right person.


    -Get extra episodes by joining our Patreon community or becoming a member on Himalaya. We use the money for equipment, studio rentals, editing, mixing, travel for live shows, and more! If you can't support the pod on a monthly basis, please consider tipping us through Paypal. We truly appreciate it!

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    Growing Up Gay w/ Cameron Esposito - Ep. 126 Apr 07, 2020

    We're Dyking Out with Cameron Esposito (Brooklyn 99, Queery, Take My Wife) about her new memoir Save Yourself and what it was like to be a little gay kid. We discuss the days when we were gay but didn't yet know it, and whether it was a decade ago or days ago, maybe you can relate! Were you the one in your friend group who played with gender norms on Halloween? Did you always feel extra different but couldn't quite put your finger on it? Did you have a crush on Claire Danes? Do you still have a crush on Claire Danes??? We also talk about how the global pandemic has hit too close to home and turned all of our plans upside down. We had a blast chatting with Cameron from afar, and if you want a dose of laughter and relatable stories, be sure to pickup her memoir Save Yourself or listen to the audiobook!

    -Get extra episodes by joining our Patreon community or becoming a member on Himalaya. We use the money for equipment, studio rentals, editing, mixing, travel for live shows, and more! If you can't support the pod on a monthly basis, please consider tipping us through Paypal. We truly appreciate it!

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    Feel Good w/ Ally Pankiw - Ep. 125 Mar 31, 2020

    If you're wondering what queer content to stream during your queerantine, look no further than the new dramedy Feel Good (out on Netflix in the US and Channel 4 in the UK). We dyked out with director Ally Pankiw about the making of the show and why it's so different than other queer narratives. Having immediately binged the first season, Melody and Carolyn were ready with all the questions about shooting strap-on sex, working with Lisa Kudrow, and whether or not there will be a second season. Are you team George? Team Lava? We hope you all take some time to watch this nuanced look into the fictionalized life of comedian Mae Martin as she navigates gender, sexuality, and new relationships as a recovering addict. Plus, Carolyn talks about getting the 'rona as Melody tries to distract herself with wild animal murder mystery shows that end up hitting a little too close to her life. We end with a fun question from a listener about throwing a cup-size-reveal party.

    -Get extra episodes by joining our Patreon community or becoming a member on Himalaya. We use the money for equipment, studio rentals, editing, mixing, travel for live shows, and more! If you can't support the pod on a monthly basis, please consider tipping us through Paypal. We truly appreciate it!

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    Work-life Balance w/ LaQuet Sharnell Pringle - Ep. 124 Mar 24, 2020

    What a time to be re-thinking our work-life balance when many of us are out of work or over-worked due to the global pandemic! Broadway performer LaQuet Sharnell Pringle had made some huge adjustments to figure out life as a new mom who had been booked in a new Broadway musical, just for all of that to be turned on its head this past week. But not even a remote broadcast could keep LaQuet's bubbly and bright personality from shining through on this episode. We talk all about coping and adjusting to changes, burnout, and the pressure to be productive, even at a time when the world is telling us to retreat and relax. We can't wait for life to get back to normal so we can see her back in action in the new musical Mrs. Doubtfire. Melody and Carolyn also chat about their quarantine snacking and the internet ganging up on Ellen.

    -Get extra episodes by joining our Patreon community or becoming a member on Himalaya. We use the money for equipment, studio rentals, editing, mixing, travel for live shows, and more! If you can't support the pod on a monthly basis, please consider tipping us through Paypal. We truly appreciate it!

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    Lesbian Stereotypes w/ Sarah Hallonquist - Ep. 123 Mar 17, 2020

    Gather your adopted cats, gas up the U-Haul, head over to your best friend's house (who is also your ex), and stay in for the night while listening to this episode about Lesbian Stereotypes! We're joined by the awesome Sarah Hallonquist, an organizer and activist for NYC Dyke Bar Takeover who is well versed in dyke spaces and the reality of what it means to be a dyke. What stereotypes still ring true? Which are the most harmful to the community? Which make us want to scream "mind your heterosexual business!" We also discuss how coronavirus is changing our lives (everything is cancelled), and how not to be an asshole during a pandemic. Plus, Melody roasts Carolyn for her possible hormone-induced weirdness. Finally, we end with a question about how to support a partner with kids during complicated situations. We're so sad to miss seeing you Susans up in Alaska and out on the West Coast, but we'll do our best to reschedule when things (hopefully) return to normal.

    -Get extra episodes by joining our Patreon community or becoming a member on Himalaya. We use the money for equipment, studio rentals, editing, mixing, travel for live shows, and more! If you can't support the pod on a monthly basis, please consider tipping us through Paypal. We truly appreciate it!

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    Female Gaze w/ Valerie Complex - Ep. 122 Mar 10, 2020

    We are THRILLED to be joined by the astute and prolific Valerie Complex to talk about all things Portrait of a Lady On -- Er...Female Gaze. We definitely do not spend half of this episode talking about how much we love a certain sapphic film and instead talk about why it makes a huge difference to treat women as subjects, not objects, on screen. Valerie is a film critic and freelance writer, and also a member of Portrait nation. Oh no, we did it again. We swear that's not all we talk about. There's also much discussion about negative experiences we've had in France, like when Valerie went to Cannes and saw - you guessed it - Portrait of a Lady On Fire. After nerding out about or favorite femme-heavy flicks, we answer an interesting question from a listener who is hung up on a past fling!

    -Get extra episodes by joining our Patreon community or becoming a member on Himalaya. We use the money for equipment, studio rentals, editing, mixing, travel for live shows, and more! If you can't support the pod on a monthly basis, please consider tipping us through Paypal. We truly appreciate it!

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    Compulsory Heterosexuality w/ Rachel McCartney - Ep. 121 Mar 03, 2020

    Comedian Rachel McCartney joins us talk about the theory that the only normal sexual relationships in society are between men and women, also known as compulsory heterosexuality. We definitely had to go to Wikipedia to prepare! Have you ever tried to fight your feelings and sexual identity to see if you could make heterosexuality work? It's a funny, messy discussion about the complicated nature of being queer, accepting of your identity, and trying to go against it. We also talk about the masterpiece that is Portrait of a Lady on Fire and a VERY bad Susan at Melody's Stonewall co-hosting debut. Plus, we talk about language policing and cancel culture within the queer community. We end with a question from a very special Susan about getting over her first big heartbreak.


    -Get extra episodes by joining our Patreon community or becoming a member on Himalaya. We use the money for equipment, studio rentals, editing, mixing, travel for live shows, and more! If you can't support the pod on a monthly basis, please consider tipping us through Paypal. We truly appreciate it!

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    Doulas w/ Solange Azor - Ep. 120 Feb 25, 2020

    On this episode, we do our doula due diligence by dyking out with the lovely Solange Azor! On top of being a funny comedian and writer, Solange is a full-service doula who helps women through pregnancy, giving birth, abortion, and postpartum needs. And wouldn't you know it, the world of doulas is extraordinarily queer. Carolyn also shares more about her and her wife's process for starting a family, while Melody explains what a period coach is. This episode is so educational, we're surprised it's not on PBS! Well, maybe because we also talk about pillows with vibrators, our hatred of Oligarchs, and celebrity gossip. Plus, we end with a question from a listener who is trying not to let her past drama get in the way of her future.

    -Get extra episodes by joining our Patreon community or becoming a member on Himalaya.

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    Trauma w/ Samantha Sidley – Ep. 119 Feb 18, 2020


    Big episode alert! We’re dyking out with the VERY talented Samantha Sidley about trauma (trigger warning for sexual assault, car accidents, and eating disorders). Samantha is an incredible jazz singer and interpreter whose album Interior Person is out now. We talk all about the lasting impact that trauma has on our lives and different strategies for coping with it. This is a very special and important episode for many reasons. Samantha is an absolute joy and we really hope you check out her music and see her perform live if you can. Also, it’s our first official episode to launch the next phase of Dyking Out. That’s right, our co-host reveals herself, and we are so excited for the future of this podcast and its community. Much love to all of our Susans, now and always.

    -Come to the next Dyking Out at Stonewall comedy show in NYC. Get tickets here.


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    Internalized Homophobia w/ Rita Brent – Ep. 118 Feb 11, 2020

    Comedian Rita Brent joins us to talk about the trifecta of factors that fed her internalized homophobia. Even the most out and proud of us have face some form of this harmful feeling that can make us act against our own interests or even hurt those around us. Rita talks about how growing up in Mississippi, in the church, and enlisting in the military all shaped her views of her queer identity. We’ve also got Melody Kamali in the co-host seat this week to give Rita tips on her recent move to New York and how to connect with Connecticut audiences. Plus, we end with a listener question from South Africa!




    -Come to the next Dyking Out at Stonewall comedy show in NYC. Get tickets here.




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    Butch w/ Kelli Dunham – Ep. 117 Feb 04, 2020


    Finally, a whole episode dedicated to that butch life. Well, sort of. We couldn’t help but grill special guest, comedian/author/performer Kelli Dunham, about her past as a nun. And it’s every bit as awesome as Carolyn had hoped. Courtney Rada once again steps into the co-host seat as we talk about life as a queer butch. What is it like to have to explain and defend how you present to heteros? Which stereotypes ring the most true? Why are people such assholes about bathrooms? Plus, we answer a question from a recently-married Susan about – dun dun dun – lesbian bed death. Be sure to check out Kelli’s new comedy album: Not The Gym Teacher.




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    Femme 4 Femme w/ Ali Clayton – Ep. 116 Jan 28, 2020

    Three femmes sit down for a podcast recording and hilarity ensues! Comedian Ali Clayton (Vice) came to talk about her experiences dating people across the gender spectrum, including her current relationship with a femme woman who ALSO JUST HAPPENS to be our guest co-host, Melody Kamali! We dyke out about Ali’s past experiences with beauty pageants, trauma (tw), Native American rehab camp, and back rubs from her cousin. We also learned about Melody’s disdain for sharing, which is ironic because she had to share mic time on this episode. Hey, maybe she’s not so bad at sharing after all! We got so carried away with our conversations about past relationships, picking up women, and whether gender and presentation means everything or nothing, that we don’t even get to talk about Ali’s pet ZEBRAS.




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    Bisexual & Biracial w/ Julia Shiplett – Ep. 115 Jan 21, 2020


    Let’s get intersectional with the very funny Julia Shiplett (Comedy Central, The New York Times) and guest co-host/founding father Lorena Russi! We’re dyking out about what’s it like to be both bisexual and biracial, as well as how everyone’s journey to self-discovery is different. But it wouldn’t be an episode of Dyking Out if we didn’t veer off onto topics like dental dams and Alaskan comedy. Especially when Lorena takes the wheel! Plus, we answer a listener question about life as a bottom butch!




    -Dyke Out with us at Stonewall for our first show of 2020 on January 27.




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    Dungeons & Dragons w/ Kody Keplinger – Ep. 114 Jan 14, 2020

    Are you a human in the streets but a non-binary pansexual cleric in the character sheets? Whether you know what this means or want to find out, tune into this very special episode with New York Times best-selling YA author Kody Keplinger (The DUFF) and guest co-host Mindy Raf! Before we talk shop regarding all things table top, we dyke out about body positivity, Little Women, Ellen, and so much more! So what’s it like when two D&D n00bs talk to a seasoned played? It turns out the game is very relatable and VERY queer. It’s a fascinating conversation with one of our most interesting and imaginative guests! And remember, this year, BYOK!!! Also, find out what #BYOK means and why it’s our motto for 2020.




    -Dyke Out with us at Stonewall for our first show of 2020 on January 27.




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    Cabarets w/ Eliot Glazer – Ep. 113 Jan 07, 2020


    We’re kicking off the new year with an episode about some of the queerest entertainment of all! No, not Saoirse Ronan’s lesbian-energy-fueled portrayal of Jo March in Little Women. We’re dyking out about Cabarets with the funny and talented Eliot Glazer (Broad City, You’re Making It Worse podcast) and guest co-host Courtney Rada (Carnivorous on Food Network). Recorded the day after our holigay spectacular at NYC’s Joe’s Pub (the site of so many queertastic cabarets), we talk about the icons who have built their reputations with this medium, and why Cabarets are inherently gay. Plus, we talk about Eliot’s super popular live show, Haunting Renditions. We also talk about Pete Buttigieg, our body temperatures, Howard Stern and Celine Dion. Eventually, we end with a messy question from a listener who is suspicious of her partner’s friend. Strap in and strap on because we hope to make 2020 our dykiest year yet!




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    Relationship Regrets w/ Glo Butler – Ep. 112 Dec 17, 2019

    It’s the last episode of the year so why not look back on all of our regrets, or lack there of? Relationships can be so confusing, it’s hard to know what’s worth fighting for or when to let go. Guest co-host Lorena Russia and comedian Glo Butler join the pod to talk about the past, present and future of their respective relationships. May all of your yuletide’s be merry and gay, and we can’t wait to see what 2020 brings for us and our Susans.




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    Holiday Movies w/ Christin Baker – Ep. 111 Dec 10, 2019


    The holidays are just around the corner, and what better to get us in the mood than the very first queer lady Christmas rom-com? Director and CEO/Founder of Tello films joins Carolyn and guest co-host Kendall Payne to dyke out about her new movie Season Of Love. We talk a lot about representation and heteronormativity in holiday movies, as well as why we have to create the projects that reflect what we want to see on the screen. Christin takes us behind the scenes to dish about the making of Season Of Love. And Kendall and Carolyn share why they appreciate the film. Before we get into the holigay spirit, we go off on Spotify Wrapped, Celine Dion, and Hillary Clinton’s REVEALING denial. We also share our last hopes and wished for The L Word, as we recorded this episode on premiere day. Finally, we end with a question from a teen Susan!




    –Last chance to get tickets to Dyke The Halls: A Dyking Out Holigay Spectacular at Joe’s Pub, December 16!




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    Commitment w/ Kate Sisk – Ep. 110 Dec 03, 2019

    Commitment can look like so many different things. A ring, an adopted cat, a pledge of exclusivity…or maybe it’s a sign you need to run for the exit. Carolyn and guest co-host Alex Song (From our “Hats” episode) are joined by comedian Kate Sisk (UCB, Boston Comedy Festival) to talk about how to navigate commitment when it looks different for you than for the person you’re with. Sure, marriage isn’t for everyone, but how do you know when that’s someone’s firmly-held belief or just an excuse? What informs our desire and ability to commit, and are we always able to spot commitment when it’s happening? Was this episode really just Kate’s way of getting discount therapy? Listen and find out! Plus, we talk about grandmas, tattoos, Mariah Carey, Dolly Parton, and Lena Waithe (though not all under the same umbrella, unfortunately). We end with a listener question about a baby-bi friend who is in a less-than-ideal relationship.

    –Get tickets to Dyke The Halls: A Dyking Out Holigay Spectacular at Joe’s Pub, December 16!

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    Burlesque w/ Nyx Nocturne – Ep. 109 Nov 26, 2019

    We’re sending you off into the Thanksgiving holiday with an extra-long revealing episode about the art of Burlesque with “The Babe That Goes Bump In The Night,” AKA Nyx Nocturne! Nyx tells us about their journey of getting into burlesque, how it intersects with their identity, choosing a name and persona, and more! Past guest and current comedian / filmmaker Kendall Payne came on as gust co-host and brings the LOLs. But before we dig into the topic, we dish about the upcoming premier of The L Word: Generation Q. Carolyn pitches an alternate show and questions the choice of characters to bring back. Then we discuss astrology as it relates to The Pattern app, and whether or not we’re all living in a complex simulation. There are so many twists and turns in this episode! Lastly, we cap it off with a listener question about popping the question…to their partner’s father.

    –Get tickets to Dyke The Halls: A Dyking Out Holigay Spectacular at Joe’s Pub, December 16!

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    Trans-cis Relationships w/ Jeena Bloom – Ep. 108 Nov 19, 2019

    Big episode alert. Comedian Jeena Bloom (Shweet! The Ladies Guide to Bro Culture podcast) joins us to dyke out about her experiences as a transgender woman and how she navigates relationships with cis partners, friends, family and co-workers. Plus, Melody Kamali, of Masturbation episode fame, fills in as guest co-host this week. We also talk about our pilgrimage to New Jersey to hear Robyn Crawford speak about her new memoir detailing her relationship with Whitney Houston. And…well…it’s not what we expected. And as always, we end with a question from a listener who made non-refundable vacation plans with someone they’re no longer dating. We’re sending out a big virtual hug to all of our Susans this week. Once you listen to the episode, you’ll understand why.

    -Dyke Out with us at Stonewall for the last time in 2019 on November 25.

    –Get tickets to Dyke The Halls: A Dyking Out Holigay Spectacular at Joe’s Pub, December 16!

    -Get extra episodes by joining out Patreon community of becoming a member on Himalaya.

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    Relationship Roles w/ Whitney Chanel Clark – Ep. 107 Nov 12, 2019

    Comedian Whitney Chanel Clark (Broadway Comedy Club) has a bone to pick about assumed roles in relationships. Like why are more masc-presenting women expected to pay on dates or service selfish pillow princesses? What are the double standards that take place in same-sex relationships, and what can we do to defy stereotypes? We explore all of this and more (strap-ons, domestic abuse, cheating) in this extra candid episode. But first, we try to figure out how to stop the heteros from their destructive and lethal gender reveal parties. Finally, we end with a messy listener question about an inappropriate manager.

    -Dyke Out with us at Stonewall for the last time in 2019 on November 25.

    –Get tickets to Dyke The Halls: A Dyking Out Holigay Spectacular at Joe’s Pub, December 16!

    -Get extra episodes by joining out Patreon community of becoming a member on Himalaya.

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    Androgyny w/ Irene Tu – Ep. 106 Nov 05, 2019

    We’re blurring the lines of gender expressing and talking all about androgyny with comedian Irene Tu! Named one of the best up-and-coming comedians by Vulture, Irene tells us about her path to her current aesthetic and habit of shopping in the mens section. Plus, we go off on pockets for the second time because we can’t shout enough about how badly we need properly sized pockets to put our lezsentials in (okay, maybe chapstick fits in small spaces, but you get what we mean). We also talk about our latest Stonewall show and both the amazing and not-so-amazing audience etiquette. Then we cover representative Kate Hill’s resignation and the 2020 primary field. Finally, we end with a listener question about significant others and military ambitions!

    –Get tickets to Dyke The Halls: A Dyking Out Holigay Spectacular at Joe’s Pub, December 16!

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    Cheating w/ Caitlin Reese – Ep. 105 Oct 29, 2019

    TRIGGER WARNING (see topic for reference). Comedian Caitlin Reese came by to talk about one of the unfortunate realities of being in relationships: cheating! Unfortunately, most of us have experience with this act, whether we were the perp, victim, or the side piece. Or perhaps you have people in your life whose cheating has affected you even though you aren’t romantically involved. We talk all about physical and emotional cheating, why we do it, and how to cope with the aftermath. There was so much to cover here and impossible to tackle it all. Before we re-opened all our relationship wounds, we talked about Halloween and a real-life monster that past guest Amber Rollo unexpectedly encountered and confronted. And as always, we end on a listener question about mental health in relationships.

    –Get tickets to Dyke The Halls: A Dyking Out Holigay Spectacular at Joe’s Pub, December 16!

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    Bad Lesbian Movies w/ Kendall Payne – Ep. 104 Oct 22, 2019

    Pop some popcorn and get ready to binge on things that make us cringe! Comedian and director Kendall Payne (Netflix Is A Joke) dykes out with us about the bad lesbian movies we love to watch, or not watch in Sarah’s case. Whether it’s problematic couplings, overdone tropes, cheesy dialogue, or un-relatable narratives created by the heteros, there are a lot of movies geared toward queer women that miss the mark. Also, we reveal the name we’ll be using to refer to our amazing listeners. And we also come up with a list of things that are inherently queer, starting with murder and ending with Canada. What else made the list? You’ll have to listen to find out! Plus, we answer a listener question about her not-too-alpha girlfriend.

    -Grab your costume and Dyke Out with us at The Stonewall Inn on October 28!

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    Weed w/ John-Allison “A.W.” Weiss – Ep. 103 Oct 15, 2019

    We had a chill time this week with singer-songwriter John-Allison Weiss (who performs as A.W.) talking about a popular herb that we obtained legally and are old enough to smoke/ingest. Eventually the topic kicks in, but we take our time getting there to catch up on Ellen and Madonna. We also shout out a past guest who was in the movie Hustlers, and learn about Sarah’s foray into somewhat relevant queer content. Once the smoke clears, we tackle the topic and share our earliest experiences with marijuana. What’s our relationship with it? Does it play a role in the creative process? What are the draw backs? And please remember A.W.’s wise advise to be responsible and wait until your brain finishes developing. Finally, we roll it all up with our listener question about how to deal with her loneliness.

    -Grab your costume and Dyke Out with us at The Stonewall Inn on October 28!

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    Navigating Gender w/ Annick Adelle – Ep. 102 Oct 08, 2019

    German-born and L.A.-based comedian Annick Adelle joined us to dyke out about Navigating Gender. Annick is exploring the gender spectrum and starting to make decisions about to which extent to transition. We talk about the spectrum of gender and how different everyone’s experience with it is, as well as how that can change over time (or not!). How does dysphoria affect identity and our perceptions of gender? What are some of the things people consider when trying to affirm their appearance with how they feel? Of course, it wouldn’t be a proper Dyking Out episode without a few detours into topics like Judy Garland, Tegan & Sara, the resistance, and motorcycles. Plus, we answer a listener question about confiding in the subject of a past fling.

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    Top Surgery w/ Jake Noll – Ep. 101 Oct 01, 2019

    Chicago comedian Jake Noll came by to dyke out about their recent top operation, giving us all the nipple-hardening details (actually, no nipples required!). We talk about what made them want to get it in the first place, the procedure itself, and financial challenges. We also talk about how different their life is now, and how others reacted to it (even though it’s none of their business).

    This was our first time recording in 20 days, so before we talk about tops, we start at the bottom by chewing out the women who defend terrible men in comedy. Carolyn also issues a couple of important corrections and updates from previous episodes, and we answer a very tricky listener question about being in a relationship with opposing political beliefs. We had such a great time with Jake. Be sure to check out their series, Just Call Me Ripley.

    (Note: Since recording the episode, Jake has changed their name, which is why you’ll hear a different name used on the audio.)

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    Moms w/ Margaret Cho – Ep. 100 Sep 24, 2019

    Praise be to the Goddess, we’ve made it to episode ONE FREAKING HUNDRED. And to celebrate, we have none other than bisexual dykon (#bivisibilityday) and comedian Margaret Cho in a discussion about Moms and SO much more. Yes, Sarah and Carolyn ended their L.A. trip by dyking out with one of the most influential comedians of our time. Before we get into the topic, we talk about gatekeepers in comedy (the usual suspects) and the past instinct of wanting to blend in to be accepted as a serious comic. Plus, we chat about her time navigating conservative populations while living in Peachtree City, Georgia. The topic of Moms seemed perfect for this episode since Margaret’s own mother makes it into so much of her comedy, Sara’s mom is our biggest fan, and Carolyn’s mom has an artful nude of Patti. We talk about Margaret’s mom’s reaction to her bisexuality, first same-sex partner, and abortions. We end by giving advice to a listener who isn’t quite sure how to come out to her father who, duh, prefers conversations about the weather. Be sure to check out Margaret’s new podcast, The Margaret Cho!

    A huge thanks to all of our listeners. We love you and are so thankful for the time you spend with us each week. We could not make it to episode 100 without you!

    –Dyke Out with us at The Stonewall Inn on September 30!

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    Parenting w/ Amanda Deibert – Ep. 99 Sep 17, 2019

    We’ve got 99 episodes and this is one! Carolyn and Sarah made the most of their L.A. adventure by dyking out with TV and comic book writer Amanda Deibert about parenting! You may know Amanda from her wonderful and often uplifting twitter account, which we discuss along with our thoughts on the horror genre and Twister-era Helen Hunt. Why also wonder what the hell happened to Leelee Sobieski (apparently she quit acting to be a visual artist). But then we get to the topic to talk about what it’s like being a parent, and specifically on in a same-sex relationship. How do parents navigate gender and gender stereotypes? Who goest to the father-daughter dance? How much of parenting is the same regardless of your sex or gender? Plus, we end with a question from a baby gay who hates meeting her girlfriend’s exes.

    –Dyke Out with us at The Stonewall Inn on September 30!

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    Young Adult w/ Britta Lundin – Ep. 98 Sep 10, 2019

    Put away the jingle jangle and listen to this all-new episode with special guest Britta Lundin (Riverdale, Ship It). Carolyn and Sarah came all the way to sunny Los Angeles to get the scoop on all things Young Adult. Britta knows the YA world inside out, emphasis on the out. We talk about YA as a genre, how it relates to fan fiction, why it doesn’t get the respect it deserves, and how it’s getting gayer each year. But before we get to the topic, we talk about our time in Los Angeles including aggressive lawn signs and breathing in air you can see. Plus, we stumble upon the best name for a new lesbian bar. We also answer a listener’s question about her role in a friend’s wedding.

    –Dyke Out with us at The Stonewall Inn on September 30!

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    Toxic Relationships w/ Aida Osman – Ep. 97 Sep 03, 2019

    Sometimes on our quest to find “the one” (whatever that means), we find ourselves caught up in relationships that teach us a lot about what we don’t want – or at least what we don’t need. Aida Osman (Wild ‘N Out) came by to talk about her experience with a toxic relationship, and how she found herself excusing toxic behavior from a female partner that she would have never tolerated from a male partner. We discuss how we fall into these relationships, why we don’t realize it when we’re in them, and how to break out of them. We also talk about the VMAs, Billie “Eyelash”, gender reveals, and answer an AMAZINGLY MESSY listener question.

    -Get extra episodes by joining out Patreon community.

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    Chosen Family w/ Alicia Goldsmith – Ep. 96 Aug 27, 2019

    What happens when you’re queer and afro-latinx and growing up in a conservative, religious white family? Unfortunately, it’s what most of us would assume. Comedian and performer Alicia Goldsmith came by to talk to us about her experiences in her adopted family, and why finding a chosen family as an adult was so important to her. But before we dive into the details of her journey, we hit a range of topics. From Sarah officially calling an end to any talk about a pop star who shall no longer be named, to a queer pairing on Bachelor in Paradise, to our feelings about Lola Bunny in Space Jam – this episode has it all! Plus, we end it with a listener question that sort of answers itself?

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    Ex-Husbands w/ Tessa Skara – Ep. 95 Aug 19, 2019

    ¡Ay, caramba! Comedian and rock goddess Tessa Skara (High Maintenance) came to dyke out with us about ex-husbands, though admittedly, she has more to say on the topic than we do. Tessa tells us how TV sitcoms shaped her idea of what a husband was supposed to be, and how her queer identity affected the relationship. Her journey to becoming a fabulous NYC divorcée is heartfelt, fascinating, funny, and probably relatable for many of our listeners. We also talk about Broadway’s The Prom, our own proms, holding in emotions, and the toxic manifestations repressed homosexuality. Plus, we share our theories and gripes on the now infamous “Work Wife” piece from The New York Times. And as always, we end with a listener question about the acceptance of being aroflux in the LGBTQ community. Thank goodness for Google.

    –Dyke Out with us at The Stonewall Inn on August 26

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    Masturbation w/ Melody Kamali – Ep. 94 Aug 13, 2019

    Fire up that incognito browser and settle in for this squirtastic episode on masturbation with comedian Melody Kamali! From anecdotes, to survey data, to things we don’t want our moms to hear, we bare it all. Did you know that queer women masturbate more than straight women? Or at least we’re more willing to admit it! Frequency? Toys? Location? We go there. Did Jamie Lee Curtis’s striptease in True Lies make you crave some alone time? We also discuss whether or not Missy Elliott is out and the creepiness of (male) magicians. Plus, we answer a listener questions about dental dams!!!

    –Dyke Out with us at The Stonewall Inn on August 26, where you can see Melody perform! (standup, not masturbation)

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    Fat and Queer w/ Colette McIntyre – Ep. 93 Aug 06, 2019

    Colette McIntyre is so much more than fat and queer, and that couldn’t be more evident than on this very funny episode. We had a BLAST bitching about the oppressive summer weather, Lea DeLaria’s Problematic Strap, and Carolyn’s inability to pee outside. Then we dyke out about what it’s like to be fat and queer, and whether or not the LGBTQ+ community is inclusive of different body types. And we tackle questions like why do fat and queer women get automatically labeled as butch? Why aren’t people capable of giving a compliment without bringing body-size into it. Why don’t people just mind their fucking business? And most importantly, which of our listeners is going to fall in love with Colette over Instagram and smooch her IRL??? Lastly, we answer a listener question about her homophobic family.
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    OCD w/ Olivia Levine – Ep. 92 Jul 30, 2019

    Holy heat wave! Is summer almost over? We miss our flannels. Lucky for us, we got to have a cool conversation with the funny and grind-happy Olivia Levine about OCD (obsessive compulsive disorder). It’s an anxiety disorder that is widely misunderstood, so Olivia breaks down what it is and how it manifests in her life. We talk about how it has intersected with her sexual identity and affected her relationships, as well as what she does to cope. But first, we talk about one of our favorite topics – Sarah’s lack of queer media consumption, as well as what it was like for Olivia growing up in San Francisco. And, we end by answering a listener question about coming out at work Special shout out to Dyke Soccer!

    -Get extra episodes by joining out Patreon community.

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    Stand-up Comedy w/ Ali Kolbert – Ep. 91 Jul 23, 2019

    We invited the HILARIOUS Ali Kolbert (The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon) to come and dyke out about stand-up comedy, but it quickly turned into a roast. Carolyn gives a quick recap of her trip to Peru, or at least her understanding of it. Then, Ali calls out Sarah’s most problematic behavior: refusing to watch queer tv. So instead we talk about Big Little Lies, one of our favorite straight-people topics. Eventually we get to talking about being a queer stand-up comic, including performing in queer spaces and talking about our sexuality to straight audiences. We only scratch the surface, but hopefully it’s enough to give you an idea of what it’s like out there for queer women in comedy. Maybe we could have covered more, but Ali and Sarah were having too much fun with the sadder details of Carolyn’s past relationships.
    -Come see past and future guests tell jokes on July 29 at Stonewall. Get tickets here.
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    Dyke Spaces w/ Alex Koones – Ep. 90 Jul 16, 2019

    Whether you identify as lesbian, bisexual, queer, or ace, (cue Cheers theme song) sometimes you wanna go where everybody is a dyke. But when lesbian bars are closing down at the pace of Shane’s love life, we need to create new dyke spaces while supporting those that still exist. Alex Koones, the founder of Babetown dinner parties for queer women and trans and non-binary people, joined us to tell us about the dyke spaces she frequents, and the one she created. Why do we seek out these spaces? How have they changed over the years? How do you create dyke spaces in your community? This episode was recorded the Monday after NYC Pride, so Carolyn and Sarah also share how they celebrated, including Sarah’s thoughts on her first Dyke March. We end the episode with a listener’s question about internalized homophobia while trying to date women.

    -Come see past and future guests tell jokes on July 29 at Stonewall. Get tickets here.

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    Rebounds w/ pronoun (Alyse Vellturo) – Ep. 89 Jul 08, 2019

    Trying to bounce back from a broken heart can be fun, messy, and everything in between. Alyse Alyse Vellturo, who makes music under the name pronoun, joined us to dyke out about the different ways we try to get over one person by getting under another. Or how sometimes, you don’t need a person at all. We talk about what constitutes a rebound, how to communicate expectations, and when does a rebound stop being a rebound? Also, Sarah gives a very detailed example of a rebound gone bad in a series of hard-to-defend moves on her part. It’s a cautionary tale for our listeners. Before we get to the topic, Carolyn rants about how nobody under 30 seems to care about Madonna, and the dykes discuss how their pride week is going. Be sure to listen to pronoun’s album “i’ll show you stronger” and see when you can catch her on tour opening for Taking Back Sunday.
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    Sobriety w/ Be Steadwell – Ep. 88 Jul 02, 2019

    Pride month is over, but let’s keep the gay going with a new episode! The talented Be Steadwell was in town to play the opening ceremony of world pride but made some time to dyke out about being sober. The queer community experiences addiction and alcoholism at higher rates than cis straight people, so whether you’re sober or not, it’s important to be aware of these struggles. We discuss why people decide to be sober, how it can affect relationships and your social life, the challenges, and the many perks. We also answer a listener question about dating as a newly out gay woman. Once you’re done listening, be sure to check out Be’s latest album, Queer Love Songs, out now!

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    Coming Out After 30 w/ Liza Treyger – Ep. 87 Jun 24, 2019

    We did it! We had a great live recording in NYC and got to meet some of our gaymazing listeners (even the straight ones are gaymazing for being there). This episode has it all, including Sarah’s mom (okay, she’s just in the room), past guest Jess Henderson doing standup, and our special guest for the evening, Liza Treyger (The Degenerates on Netflix). We talked about everything from Carolyn’s West coast tour to Big Little Lies to Taylor Swift and more. And what’s a discussion about coming out without a few minutes of discussing The L Word? As much as we try to stay away, we can’t! Even though Liza had previously hooked up with women, it took years before she realized she actually wanted to date them, and once she did, things made so much more sense. We explored the ways in which it might be different from coming out at a younger age, and how it’s changed her perspective. We also answer a listener question who wants to know if her parents know she’s queer based on the car they want to buy her.
    -Keep the podcast a-lez and gay by donating to our Patreon, where you can get some sapphic swag.
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    Pop Music w/ Sir Babygirl – Ep. 86 Jun 11, 2019

    Cool episode alert! We’re talking all things queer and pop with your next big crush, the very funny and extremely talented Sir Babygirl! We talk about our experiences with pop music, from being raised on Whitney Houston to shunning the genre during our teen years because of stigmatization. But there’s so much power in pop music, especially for women and queer artists. Sir Babygirl also tells us more about her signature strap, and about the struggles she’s encountered while making her way into the industry. PLUS, she gifts us with an acoustic performance of her cover of Kesha’s “Praying” which she recently recorded for pride, and you can read more about it here. But first, we dyke out about The Perfection on Netflix and sex swings (as we all should be doing this pride month). We also answer a listener’s question about how to talk to others about her polyamory. We hope you love this episode as much as we do, and please check our Sir Babygirl’s album “Crush On Me” which is out now on all the usual suspects.

    -See us record a live episode for pride in NYC on June 23 at 7pm with special guest Kathy Tu. Tickets here!

    -Keep the podcast a-lez and gay by donating to our Patreon, where you can get some sapphic swag.

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    Long Distance Relationships w/ Katie-Ellen Humphries – Ep. 85 Jun 04, 2019

    We’re cool with being in a long-distance relationship with many of our listeners, but for a romantic partner? That’s up for debate. And debate we do on this episode with comedian Katie-Ellen Humphries (CBC)! Katie loves LDR’s, but Carolyn’s past experience makes her wary, while Sarah wants…a boyfriend on the moon? What are the perks of not living in the same city as your partner? Are LDR’s better or worse than any other kind of relationship? What’s the ideal distance to have with a partner? Before we get to our topic, we dyke out about sex benches, Madonna and Vancouver Island (unfortunately those conversations are unrelated). And we finish with a question from a listener who is unsure about coming out to her very traditional mother. Happy pride month!
    -See us record a live episode for pride in NYC on June 23 at 7pm with special guest Kathy Tu. Tickets here!
    -Keep the podcast a-lez and gay by donating to our Patreon, where you can get some sapphic swag.
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    The Lesbian Label w/ Courtney Rada – Ep. 84 May 28, 2019

    Courtney Rada (Food Network) joins us for a wild episode about artful nudes and so much more! This episode has everything, from Alanis Morissette covers, to AMAZING band name pitches, to Anne Lister…oh, and eventually we make it to the topic. “Here’s my lesbian daughter” or “This is the lesbian I’ve been telling you about!” are things that have been said about us over the years, and we attempt to figure out why that is. Or how about cis het men who act like it’s totally cool that they’re buddies with you because you’re a lez? When does the lesbian label help and when does it hurt us? Finally, we wrap it up with a listener question from Paraguay. We hope you have as much fun listening to this episode as we had recording it!

    -See us record a live episode for pride in NYC on June 23 at 7pm. Tickets here!

    -Keep the podcast a-lez and gay by donating to our Patreon, where you can get some sapphic swag.

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    -Like our theme song? You’ll love the duo behind it: There Is No Mountain

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    Gay In High School w/ Sabrina Wu – Ep. 83 May 20, 2019

    Comedian Sabrina Wu (Harvard Lampoon) joins us and braves all of our dated television and movie references to talk about what it was like being gay in high school. We may or may not have gotten a little off topic at times, but Sabrina was kind enough to share her experiences that made Sarah and Carolyn RELIEVED that they went to high school in the early aughts. Okay, maybe it’s just the idea of a prom-posal that has them feeling nostalgic for the good ol’ days of locker notes or having friends ask for you. Anyway, a lot has changed between then and now, but there are definitely things that remain the same for us queerdos. We also talk about having agency over our bodies, Alyssa Milano’s #sexstrike, Carolyn spreading false gossip, Gentleman Jack and more! Plus, we answer a listener question about work place harassment.
    -See us record a live episode for pride in NYC on June 23 at 7pm. Tickets here!
    -Keep the podcast a-lez and gay by donating to our Patreon, where you can get some sapphic swag.
    -For related content, follow us on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and Leave Us a Review if you like what you hear!
    -Like our theme song? You’ll love the duo behind it: There Is No Mountain

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    Biphobia w/ Rosa Escandón – Ep. 82 May 14, 2019

    This episode is not camp, but that won’t stop us from kicking things off by talking about New York’s gayest night that is consistently ruined by the straights: The MET Gala. We also talk about some hot (and stale) celesbian gossip, and solve the mystery of Sarah’s Palm Springs lewk. Was it just some vacation experimentation or is Sarah getting ready to be Kyrsten Sinema’s Arizona-based house wife? But best of all, the hilarious Rosa Escandón joins for this extra long episode to discuss all of this and more! Our topic this week focuses on biphobia from within the LGBTQ+ community and the heteros looking in. Biphobia and bierasure is an ongoing problem, and the ladies examine the possible sources behind it while doing some serious navel-gazing. Rosa has a particularly interesting perspective on the topic because not only is she bisexual, but she was raised in the super queer Bay Area by her lesbian moms. It’s an interesting discussion, and one that reminds us all to examine our biases and keep doing better to make everyone feel welcome and safe in the community.

    -Come to Dyking Out at Stonewall in NYC on Monday, May 27 Tickets here!

    -See us record a live episode for pride in NYC on June 23 at 7pm. Tickets here!

    -Keep the podcast a-lez and gay by donating to our Patreon, where you can get some sapphic swag.

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    -Like our theme song? You’ll love the duo behind it: There Is No Mountain

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    Navigating Your Twenties w/ Lily Richards – Ep. 81 May 07, 2019

    Most teens can’t wait until they are in their twenties. Most people in their thirties are thankful their twenties are behind them, regardless of how amazing or tumultuous those years were. Lily Richards, creator and star of the web series Twenty (and 24-year-old), keeps us in-check as we talk about the many changes that happen in this pivotal decade. From starting jobs, to moving to new cities, to new relationships and more, it’s a time to figure out how to be an adult while holding onto your partying days (and liver). For some, it’s a time to settle down. For others, it’s a time to reinvent and experiment. It’s a different experience for each person, but a transformative time for everyone. We also talk about some of the differences between queer in your early 20s and your early 30s (and no, we don’t just mean getting a couple of gay marriages under your belt like Carolyn). This episode is sponsored by Craigslist.org and Divorce.com.
    -Keep the podcast a-lez and gay by joining our Patreon community, where you can get some sapphic swag and get in the fast lane with your questions for the pod.
    -For related content, follow us on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and Leave Us a Review if you like what you hear!
    -Like our theme song? You’ll love the duo behind it: There Is No Mountain

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    Celesbians w/ Kelsey Bailey – Ep. 80 Apr 30, 2019

    When it comes to famous lesbians, there are the ones we see in theaters and on red carpets, but the women who were on that realty TV show we watched 9 years ago can be just as popular. Kelsey Bailey (Upright Citizens Brigade, Here & Queer) joins us post-Clexacon to dish about all the Celesbians she’s been following over the years. The phrase “this is so embarrassing” is uttered multiple times, only to realize the same people. What draws us to these strangers? Why do we track all their moves? How many queer Paulson sisters are there? We also play a little game of celebrity connection with Kelsey. Obviously we can only cover so much ground, so please, no emails with “I can’t believe you didn’t mention _____.” Unless they’re super cool or hot and aren’t on our gaydar. Thx!

    -Keep the podcast a-lez and gay by joining our Patreon community, where you can get some sapphic swag and get in the fast lane with your questions for the pod.

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    -Like our theme song? You’ll love the duo behind it: There Is No Mountain

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    Intersecting Identities w/ Jess Guilbeaux – Ep. 79 Apr 23, 2019

    Season 3 Episode 5 of Netflix’s Queer Eye brought us the story of Jess Guilbeaux, a strong black lesbian who was out on her own after being outed to her adoptive family. Jess was gracious enough to dyke out with us about how that episode has affected her life, but also about living with intersecting identities. Many of us our judged by our identity, or identities, as many of us have multiple. But sometimes they can be at odds with each other, or we may be at odds with the label itself when we don’t fit perfectly into societies expectation of one category or another. We talk about labels and doing the work for more marginalized identities, and end with a plea to Paramore and a listener question about her family who doesn’t acknowledge her queerness.
    -Keep the podcast a-lez and gay by donating to our Patreon, where you can get some sapphic swag.
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    -Like our theme song? You’ll love the duo behind it: There Is No Mountain

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    Emily Dickinson w/ Madeleine Olnek – ep. 78 Apr 12, 2019

    The queer erasure of historical figures is an ongoing problem, but some people are working to make the true stories known. Whether you’ve read her work or not, you may have heard that Emily Dickinson was a reclusive spinster who didn’t want to publish her poems while she was alive. Her letters prove otherwise, yet her queer truth is still buried behind bad biographies and literal erasures. Filmmaker Madeleine Olnek came by to dyke out about Emily Dickinson’s lesbian life and promote her film that brings it to life. Out April 12 in select markets, you MUST see Wild Nights With Emily starring Molly Shannon. You’ll laugh, you’ll cry, you’ll lookup every important woman who has ever been deemed a spinster and take a second look at their life.

    -Come to Dyking Out at Stonewall in NYC on Monday, April 29. Tickets here!

    -Keep the podcast a-lez and gay by donating to our Patreon, where you can get some sapphic swag.

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    -Like our theme song? You’ll love the duo behind it: There Is No Mountain

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    Gay Aunts w/ Mila Myles – Ep. 77 Apr 09, 2019

    Okay FINE. We’ll talk about being gay aunts. If you’re realllly going to make us do it and pull out pictures of our nieces and nephews, we guess we’ll oblige. Mila Myles came by to dyke out about her experience being a gay auntie to her sister’s kids, and why somebody should maybe check her when she volunteers to bring them to New York City to look after for multiple weeks! How is being a queer presence in a child’s life different and important? How does it affect that child’s understanding of gender and sexuality? And most importantly, how can you teach them to vogue on your Instagram account??! We also talk about the whiteness of Portland, Oregon and Hulu’s Shrill, which leads us into a discussion about the gentrification of Brooklyn and how white people trigger anxiety. As always, we end with a question from a listener who shows up to DRAG Sarah! Listen, and then tag us in your #gayaunt pics!
    -Come to Dyking Out at Stonewall in NYC on Monday, April 29. Tickets here!
    -Keep the podcast a-lez and gay by donating to our Patreon, where you can get some sapphic swag.
    -For related content, follow us on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and Leave Us a Review if you like what you hear!
    -Like our theme song? You’ll love the duo behind it: There Is No Mountain

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    Growing Up Baptist w/ Chelsea Moore – Ep. 76 Apr 02, 2019

    Many of us in the LGBTQ+ community grow up feeling like we don’t really belong or fit in. Now multiply that time ten and you might get a sense of what it’s like to be a queer kid growing up in a religious household. Filmmaker Chelsea Moore (Sour Peach Films) came by to dyke out about her Southern Baptist upbringing in Tennessee, which included being home schooled. We learn about Chelsea’s early impressions of homosexuality, and how her religion’s teachings conflicted with her own experiences, as well as how it’s shaped the films she makes today. We also get the scoop on what it’s like to work with our one and only #wcw (but maybe we should change it up), Mariska Hargitay, on the set of Law & Order SVU. Finally, we answer a listener’s question about the changing nature of her sexual preferences and her husband’s change of heart on polyamory.

    -Keep the podcast a-lez and gay by donating to our Patreon, where you can get some sapphic swag.

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    -Like our theme song? You’ll love the duo behind it: There Is No Mountain

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    New York City w/ Faiven Feshazion – Ep. 75 Mar 25, 2019

    New York City, the place where your dykiest dreams can come true! Carolyn and Sarah are joined by performer and model Faiven Feshazion to talk all about how our 7-ish years in the big gay apple has completely transformed our lives. We talk about how it’s possible to be dating someone in the city and technically be in a long distance relationship, as well as how sky high rents can influence big life decisions. Faiven talks us through her journey from Dunkin Donuts commercial actress, to NBC page, to a co-starring role on The Black List. Carolyn also makes a plea to listeners to help her seal the deal with Rosie O’Donnell, while Sarah makes a great observation about Killing Eve. We also give a listener some advice on how to handle her work crush.
    -Keep the podcast a-lez and gay by donating to our Patreon, where you can get some sapphic swag.
    -For related content, follow us on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and Leave Us a Review if you like what you hear!
    -Like our theme song? You’ll love the duo behind it: There Is No Mountain

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    Baby Gay w/ Allison Ponthier – Ep. 74 Mar 18, 2019

    You just stepped out of the closet. NOW WHAT? Musician and model Allison Ponthier took a break from making TikToks to dyke out with us about what it’s like being a BABY GAY! Allison left her home in Texas and moved to New York City thinking she’d stay in a long-distance relationship with her boyfriend, but after a few Tinder swipes and an L Word binge, she started two-steppin’ out of the closet. We talk about how being a baby gay is like going through a second puberty, and discuss why everything feels so freaking epic. We also talk about the struggle and pressure to figure out your queer aesthetic and what it’s like to make friends once you’re out. But before we get to revisiting our past (Allison’s present), we rip on chatty Uber drivers and ponder the best way to signal to other lesbians in the wild. We also answer a listener question from a married mother who is just now coming to terms with her bisexuality, AKA a later-in-life baby gay.

    -Check out Allison’s music!

    -Keep the podcast a-lez and gay by donating to our Patreon, where you can get some sapphic swag.

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    -Like our theme song? You’ll love the duo behind it: There Is No Mountain

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    Opposites Attract w/ Amelia Bane – Ep. 73 Mar 12, 2019

    In every functioning relationship, there’s a “logistics,” and a “pizzazz.” What the hell does that mean? Well comedian Amelia Bane came by to give us the details of this interpretation of the saying “opposites attract.” How can you tell if your opposite features complement or repel? Does the pizzazz always have to bring the pizzazz? Can you play different roles in different relationships? Why does Carolyn think it’s good to be “opposite in the face?” Before we dissect our past and present relationships, we spin some theories about the couples fighting outside of Cubby Hole and reminisce about performing to little to no audience. We closed out the episode with a question from a listener who is looking to make the leap out of her 9-5 career.
    -There are only a few pre-sale tickets left to Dyking Out at Stonewall on March 25!
    -Keep the podcast a-lez and gay by donating to our Patreon, where you can get some sapphic swag.
    -For related content, follow us on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and Leave Us a Review if you like what you hear!
    -Like our theme song? You’ll love the duo behind it: There Is No Mountain

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    Asexuality w/ Janeane Garofalo – Ep. 72 Feb 26, 2019

    Reality does not bite here at Dyking Out because we are joined by ICON Janeane Garofalo! Yes, we’re talking about Carolyn’s #3 crush, in studio to dyke out about asexuality and so much more. Janeane lets us know why she’s not watching the Oscars, tells us how the TV sausage is made, gives valuable life advice, dishes on past roles…and we are HERE FOR IT. As we get into the topic, she shares that people have always mistaken her for a Jewish lesbian, which she OF COURSE takes as a compliment. And we discuss why asexuality as an identity may be different for everyone because there are no hard an fast rules. Finally, we wrap it all up with a question from a listener who identifies as asexual but doesn’t know how to tell for sure if she’s also queer.

    -Keep the podcast a-lez and gay by donating to our Patreon, where you can get some sapphic swag.

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    -Like our theme song? You’ll love the duo behind it: There Is No Mountain

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    Science w/ Arielle Duhaime-Ross – Ep.71 Feb 18, 2019

    We might as well call this episode “weird science” with all the crazy coincidences we stumble upon up top. The super knowledgable science, climate and environmental correspondent, Arielle Duhaime-Ross (VICE News Tonight on HBO), joins us to dyke out about the big issues impacting the most vulnerable communities. It’s a fascinating conversation about communities that are rapidly changing because of changes in the environment and policies that are meant to slow those changes. She also shares her journey from hanging out overnight in the cold with salamanders to traveling the world for VICE media, and what it’s like to be a queer, gender non-conforming person in the field. This episode is crazy (the coincidences), interesting, depressing, hopeful, fun, thoughtful – there’s something for everyone! Oh, and just so you know, Arielle’s mom is NOT friends with Gordon Lightfoot.
    -Come see us live in NYC at Stonewall on February 25!
    -Keep the podcast a-lez and gay by donating to our Patreon, where you can get some sapphic swag.
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    -Like our theme song? You’ll love the duo behind it: There Is No Mountain

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    Lesbian Sex Scenes w/ Erica Rose – Ep. 70 Feb 11, 2019

    In this new episode, we’re getting down to business. Lady on lady business. Talented Director/Writer/Producer Erica Rose (Sour Peach Films, Girl Talk) helps break down the do’s and dont’s of a lesbian love scene, as we talk about the good, the bad, and the spit. Which steamy sapphic scenes have you hitting rewind again and again? Which ones feel the least authentic? How many do you think Sarah has even seen??? We tried to cover as much ground as we could, so don’t be upset if we didn’t get to your favorite! Before we dive into our topic, there’s some podcasting foreplay with an Ellen vs. Ellen discussion, a download on Russian Doll, and a recap of the worst part of our first live show at Stonewall. Will we see you at the next one on February 25? Plus, Sarah delivers some tough love in response to this week’s listener question.

    -Come see us live in NYC at Stonewall on February 25!

    -Keep the podcast a-lez and gay by donating to our Patreon, where you can get some sapphic swag.

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    -Like our theme song? You’ll love the duo behind it: There Is No Mountain

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    Creative Journeys w/ Alice Kremelberg – Ep. 69 Feb 04, 2019

    Any of you who watched the last season of Orange Is The New Back should be familiar with this week’s guest, actress Alice Kremelberg! Alice stopped by to talk about the journey of pursuing a creative passion, but we did not make it easy for her. First, she had to put up with Carolyn and Sarah arguing about Game of Thrones YET AGAIN. Then right when we’re getting to the good stuff, we manage to derail things with a spiraling conversation about how we’re all just careening toward a certain death at the hands of our technological overlords. You know, just light-hearted every day stuff queer women think about. As we compare career rejection to dating, Sarah pitches a new game show that we know a few of our listeners would totally be into. And as usual, we end it with a question from a listener whose ex was intimidated by her butch side.
    -Come see us live in NYC at Stonewall on February 25!
    -Keep the podcast a-lez and gay by donating to our Patreon, where you can get some sapphic swag.
    -For related content, follow us on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and Leave Us a Review if you like what you hear!
    -Like our theme song? You’ll love the duo behind it: There Is No Mountain

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    Gay For Pay w/ Taylor Ortega – Ep. 68 Jan 31, 2019

    Taylor Ortega (Kim Possible) joined us to dyke out about Shay Mitchell, Cate Blanchett, Rachel Weisz, and all the other actors who play multiple queer roles on screen but identify as straight on the streets. Before we dive into the ladies who keep us asking “but is she???” we talk about Carolyn’s moment in the sapphic sun which of course leads to us discussing The L Word for the 20th time. We also clear the air about a future guest who had some recent controversy in the news and let you know why we won’t be bringing it up next month when she sits down with us (spoiler: it’s not because she’s Carolyn’s number 3 crush). But then we get right down to business, and we #namenames. Why are some actresses casted for queer roles when there are many queer actors who are available for those same parts? Who is convincing and who isn’t? Can queer people play straight characters? We wrap it up with a listener question and embarrassing exchange about TikTok. Be sure to watch Taylor as Shego in the Kim Possible movie when it comes out on The Disney Channel.

    -Keep the podcast a-lez and gay by donating to our Patreon, where you can get some sapphic swag.

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    -Like our theme song? You’ll love the duo behind it: There Is No Mountain

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    Plants w/ Jessica Henderson – Ep. 67 Jan 22, 2019

    Jessica Henderson (Upright Citizen’s Brigade) came by with her green thumb to talk about something that gets her all hot and bothered: queer ladies kissing. BUT ALSO PLANTS. From sexy orchids to emo peace lilies, we talk about the importance of self care, natural healing, and queerness all in relation to the kingdom Plantae. This episode is sprouting with gayness because we spend the first half-hour talking about things like our favorite TV kisses and what punishments we’ll subject straight people to once we’ve taken over the world (any and all straight listeners will be spared!). Also, if you’re headed to Clexacon this April, be sure to stop in on Jessica’s panel about queer voices in comedy.
    -Keep the podcast a-lez and gay by donating to our Patreon, where you can get some sapphic swag.
    -For related content, follow us on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and Leave Us a Review if you like what you hear!
    -Like our theme song? You’ll love the duo behind it: There Is No Mountain

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    Woodworking w/ Amelia Christensen – Ep. 66 Jan 15, 2019

    If you thought this podcast was gay before, hold onto your snapback! Woodworker and queer hangout organizer Amelia Christensen came by to dyke out about their carpentry craft. We learn all about how to get into woodworking, how it goes over with the ladies, why its a lesbian stereotype, the pros and cons of a tiny house, and so much more! Before we hammer out that conversation, we talk about queer lady night life in New York, cats (you’re welcome), and how we can’t count on Ellen to be in touch with the thoughts and feelings of the queer community in regards to the Kevin Hart saga. Plus, we answer a listeners questions about how to approach a workplace crush who doesn’t even work in the same office and doesn’t know you’re queer! We end on a cliffhanger: will Sarah take up carpentry and end up building dozens of beds to court single ladies?

    -Keep the podcast a-lez and gay by donating to our Patreon, where you can get some sapphic swag.

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    -Like our theme song? You’ll love the duo behind it: There Is No Mountain

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    Nostalgia w/ Jill Sobule – Ep. 65 Jan 08, 2019

    Get out your guitar and strum along to our first episode of the New Year, featuring singer-songwriter Jill Sobule! You may know Jill from her 90s mainstream hits like “I Kissed a Girl” and “Supermodel” (featured in the movie Clueless), and those of you with good taste will know her for so much more because she has over 10 albums out that are filled with some of the most interesting and enjoyable songs in the genre. Jill’s latest album is called Nostalgia Kills, which may have had something to do with this week’s topic. We dyke out about why we look back, and how it can be both pleasurable and painful. We also explore the role that nostalgia plays in our tastes in music, film, and how it can even break up relationships. But before we look back in time, we chat about the new ladies in congress who are turning heads, as well as some queer movies we saw over the holidays. PLUS, Jill treats us to a little performance of one of her more queer songs, but you’ll have to listen to find out which one!
    Want more of Jill? You can buy her latest album, and come out to see her perform live at our first Dyking Out at Stonewall show!
    -Keep the podcast a-lez and gay by donating to our Patreon, where you can get some sapphic swag.
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    -Like our theme song? You’ll love the duo behind it: There Is No Mountain

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    Holigays w/ Alex Berg – Ep. 64 Dec 18, 2018

    It’s our last episode of twenty gayteen! And who better to round out the year than the person who’s finger is on the pulse of the LGBTQ+ community? Alex Berg (Buzzfeed, Sirius XM, Huffington Post) graces our studio (and looks FABULOUSin her gf’s rad Madonna sweatshirt) to dyke out about the holigays, BUT there’s so much else we try to cover first. From Carolyn’s drunk texting with Rosie, to award ceremony categories, to TERFS on twitter – we’re dishing on all the things we love, tolerate and can’t stand. Like, what’s up with the straights and their genital reveal parties anyways??? But then we eventually get down to business talking about all of the moments that make the holiday season extra laborious for the queer community, including all of the gendering that goes on in the travel experience alone. Plus, we end on an EPIC listener question (in length and substance).

    Also, we want all of our listeners to know how AMAZING we think you are, and you really fill us with joy and so many lovely feelings. We’re working hard to bring you fresh and diverse perspectives on the topics that affect our lives, and we already have some wonderful 2019 guests in the works. Happy holigays and have a safe and wonderful New Year.

    -Keep the podcast a-lez and gay by donating to our Patreon, where you can get some sapphic swag.

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    -Like our theme song? You’ll love the duo behind it: There Is No Mountain

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    Style w/ Stray – Ep. 63 Dec 11, 2018

    We’ve talked about hair, hats and flannel at length, but this episode takes a wider look at style. And who better to dyke out with us about it than fashion blogger and influencer, Stray! We cover everything from how to dress for a first date to where to shop to how to find what style works best for you. Carolyn can’t shut up about suits, but why should she? We also talk about the celesbians who inspire our fashion choices. Plus, we answer a listener question about bed death and whether or not she should call off her engagement – that’s a high stakes question! Be sure to follow Stray on Instagram for some seriously cool outfits and adorable photos of her and her lady.
    -Keep the podcast a-lez and gay by donating to our Patreon, where you can get some sapphic swag.
    -For related content, follow us on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and Leave Us a Review if you like what you hear!
    -Like our theme song? You’ll love the duo behind it: There Is No Mountain

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    Making Your Move w/ Robby Hoffman – Ep. 62 Dec 04, 2018

    What are you even doing with your life if you’re not taking advantage of Uniqlo’s cashmere sale and dyking out with comedian Robby Hoffman (The Chris Gethard Show, Just For Laughs)? We invited Robby to talk about how to make a move on someone you’re interested in, a topic that several listeners have asked about. We explore the dynamic between masc and femme women, and how different the dynamics are for femmes seeking femmes. What’s the best way to know if that chick you’re digging is into you? What went down in Carolyn’s sister’s room? Robby explains why Carolyn is no longer allowed to be friends with women, but not before she makes a pitch to Wild Fang about the perfect bathing suit. Also, Carolyn shares a DYKONIC moment that she never knew was in store for her. Plus, we (really Sarah and Robby) give a listener some excellent advice on how to handle her flirty but straight (?????) roommate.

    -Keep the podcast a-lez and gay by donating to our Patreon, where you can get some sapphic swag.

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    -Like our theme song? You’ll love the duo behind it: There Is No Mountain

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    Brazil w/ Gabriella França – Ep. 61 Nov 27, 2018

    Get your passport ready because this episode will make you want to follow Sarah York to Brazil for Carnival! We have our first international guest on the pod, the lovely Gabriela França! She’s well-known in the Sao Paulo lesbian community for throwing the coolest queer-lady parties, having a bad ass lesbian clothing line, and being the proud owner of three cats. How are lesbians in Brazil different than in other parts of the world? What challenges does the community there face currently, and in the future given the election of their new yeasty foreskin of a President? (Brazil, I’m devastated.) Most importantly, do Brazilian lesbians wear flannel? Take a listen to find out. We also answer a listener question about ex-etiquette, AND we share some exciting news for our New York listeners! Come to Brazil!
    -Keep the podcast a-lez and gay by donating to our Patreon, where you can get some sapphic swag.
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    -Like our theme song? You’ll love the duo behind it: There Is No Mountain

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    Tinder w/ Lane Moore – Ep. 60 Nov 21, 2018

    We’re SWIPING RIGHT on this episode with the girl you wish you were best friends with in high school, the supremely talented Lane Moore (HBO’s Girls, Tinder Live, GLAAD Award recipient). Lane teases us with the queerest details of her new book How To Be Alone (out now), including her dabbling with witchcraft and crushes on best friends. Then we talk about her live Tinder show where she engages in ridiculous conversations with the straight men of Tinder to see just how much nonsense they’ll tolerate. You definitely don’t want to miss this episode! We end with a question from a trans listener who is considering sexual reassignment surgery.

    HAPPY DYKESGIVING!

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    The Apocalypse w/ Lois Thompson – Ep. 59 Nov 13, 2018

    The lovely and funny Lois Thompson joins us to dyke out about all things apocalypse. No, not the latest season of American Horror Story, rather the impending doom that feels like it’s just around the corner. But then again, hasn’t every generation felt that way? Well whether it’s coming next year or next millennia, Lois is PREPARED. We question whether or not it’s even worth trying to survive the end of the world, though maybe this is a chance for the lesbians to rise up. (We should probably rise up, apocalypse or not.) Lois also brought along her “go bag” for when shit gets real and showed us what’s inside. And after learning about helpful preparation tips, Carolyn makes Sarah and Lois play an apocalyptic game of hypotheticals called “What’s in the boooooox?” We’re pretty sure we scarred Karina with this episode. We close it out with a listener question about sexy time disparities in open relationships. Don’t wait until the end of times, listen now!
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    Loneliness w/ Aimée Lutkin – Ep. 58 Nov 06, 2018

    Feeling lonely? Let us keep you company! The one and only Aimée Lutkin (Jezebel, UCB, 2 Dates a Week) joins us to talk about dating, being single and loneliness in an episode recorded right before Halloween (Carolyn’s couples costume announcement will be old news). Fun fact: being in a romantic relationship does not shield you from feeling lonely. We talk about the different ways that people feel lonely, as well as the unfortunate pressures we put on single people who are just trying to live their damn lives. Also, Sarah temporarily swears off relationships while Carolyn rolls her eyes so hard, you can almost hear it. We also take a listener question about what to do when you bomb a date with someone you were into.

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    Life-Changing Decisions w/ Liz Glazer – Ep. 57 Oct 29, 2018

    Comedian and friend of the podcast Liz Glazer graced our studio with her presence to dyke out philosophically about Life-Changing Decisions! What does changing your career from Lawyer to Comedian/Actor have to do with coming out? More than you think! We explore how and why we make life-altering choices in our life, and what role our emotions place in the decision-making process. These moments are often scary and come with loads of uncertainty, so how do you navigate them and know whether or not you’re making the right decision? How do you support others on the brink of making a big change? You’ll also learn about the fun time Carolyn met Cecilia’s ex-wife, and what Liz had to do with it. Plus, we answer a listener question about how to deal with religious parents when you’re in a new and important relationship.
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    Sports w/ Erin McKeown – Ep. 56 Oct 23, 2018

    We really scored in getting the talented Erin McKeown to dyke out with us about Sports! As a musician, Erin loves how sports can provide entertainment for her outside of her industry. From the athlete back stories to the unpredictable nature of games, there’s so much to love. Also, how have we gone so many episodes of a lesbian podcast without “sports” as a topic when it plays such a huge role in the lives of so many queer women? But before we dive into the topic, Erin tells us about her work as the composer and lyricist for the musical Miss You Like Hell, which you can listen to by purchasing the original cast recording here (it rocks, your ears and heart will thank you). We also round the bases on topics like civic duty, trolls, and Rachel Maddow. And as usual, we end with a listener question about her partner’s rude-ass friends.

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    Matchmaking w/ Kara Laricks – Ep. 55 Oct 15, 2018

    Fashion designer turned reality-TV-winner turned matchmaker Kara Laricks joins us to dyke out about matchmaking! We live in a world of swipes and DMs, but does that have to be the only way to date? Kara tells us all about how she sets up “foxy singles” with her LGBTQ clients, and what it means to be a matchmaker specifically for that community. We hear all about the do’s and don’ts of first dates (hint: stop talking about your ex so much!), as well as why you shouldn’t lose hope when a date doesn’t work out. Plus, Carolyn discovers her wife’s secret super power and apologizes for assuming Awkwafina is a gaysian! We end with a listener question about how to talk about your ex that you dated pre-transition.
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    Interracial Relationships w/ Lauren Ashley Smith – Ep. 54 Oct 08, 2018

    We welcomed back Lauren Ashley Smith (The Rundown With Robin Thede, VH1.com, Netflix) to dyke out with us, because once was not enough! This time, we’re tackling the topic of interracial relationships. Are queer couple more likely to enter them? What are some of the challenges? How can each person use their respective privilege to support the other? There is so much to discuss around this topic, but we get a tad distracted while getting into race politics in America and how it presents its own set of challenges. Plus, Carolyn gives her reviews of the movies Lizzie and Colette, and she delivers a very important PSA for anyone in a Q&A session.

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    Gay Conversion Therapy w/ Garrard Conley – Ep. 53 Oct 02, 2018
    Garrard Conley, author of Boy Erased and activist, joined us to talk about his experience with gay conversion therapy and what it’s like to have a painful part of his past turned into a feature film. We had SO MUCH to talk about, starting with our collective rage about the Kavanaugh hearings and the high standards we (society) measure victims/survivors against. After twenty minutes of therapeutically channeling our rage, we move onto a just-as-heavy topic: Gay Conversion Therapy! First, we talk about some of the differences between the upcoming motion picture and his memoir. Then, we dive into casting, from his parents getting played by academy award-winning Aussies, to the challenges of casting LGBTQ roles. From there, we go into the dangers of conversion therapy and what battles still need to be fought, as well as where progress is being made…and so much more. Despite the dark topic, we managed to have SO MUCH fun on this episode (because we might all be dead inside)! Probably too much fun because we had to edit out at least 15 minutes where we took things a little too far. We end it with a question from a Canadian listener who is fresh out of the closet. Buy and read Boy Erased, and then see it in theaters. Or the other way around, whichever. #RepresentationMatters #TellQueerStories
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    Lesbian Weddings w/ Lauren Ashley Smith – Ep. 52 Sep 25, 2018

    We’re back with Lauren Ashley Smith (The Rundown With Robin Thede, VH1.com, Netflix) to dyke out about lesbian weddings! Do dykes tie the knot differently than the heteros? Is it best to buck traditions or do we carry societal notions of what a wedding should be? Lauren and Carolyn talk about their own weddings including what they liked and what they regretted, while Sarah daydreams about Blake Lively. But before we talk about place cards and photo booth props, we open a gaymazing gift from an awesome London-based listener, welcome back Karina, and talk about the Great British Bake Off. We end the episode with a question from a listener who is sick of women hitting on her wife right in front of her.

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    Disney w/ Jeanna Kadlec – Ep. 51 Sep 11, 2018

    Once upon a time, writer Jeanna Kadlec (Nylon Mag, Autostraddle) went to find her father in the woods, only to end up the prisoner of two dykey beasts. The beasts demanded she tell them about the queer subtext of Disney films, including why so many of the male villains read as homosexual. Before the final rose petal falls, they dance around topics like Louis C.K., the French revolution, meeting celebrities in bathrooms, and how Cruella de Vil belongs on the Upper East Side. Things seem to be going well until one of the beasts discovers that Jeanna has never watched Buffy. Does this episode have a happy ending? You’ll have to listen to find out.
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    Divorce w/ Tara Clancy- Ep. 50 Sep 04, 2018

    For our 50th episode, the incredible Tara Clancy (NYT, NPR’s Wait Wait Don’t Tell Me, The Moth) joined us to talk about Carolyn’s favorite topic: Divorce! Okay, maybe it’s not her favorite topic, but it was nice to have another divorced dyke to commiserate with. We talk about the external pressures that make you feel bad about ending your marriage, even when it’s the best thing for everyone involved. How do things get to that point? How do you move on? What do you do when children are involved? Are vacations to National Parks the beginning of the end for queer couples? We also take a listener’s question about her “friend” who she swears isn’t her, but we’re not buying it!

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    U-Hauling w/ Sophie Santos – Ep. 49 Aug 28, 2018

    Comedian, writer, and actress Sophie Santos (UCB, The Lesbian Agenda, Handmaid’s Tale: The Musical) joins us to talk about the answer to the classic setup, “What does a lesbian bring to a second date?” Hint: It’s not a dental dam. We dissect the urge to merge and whether or not we’re really that much quicker to sign a lease with our ladies than hetero couples. We also talk about what kind of girlfriend with think Cara Delevingne is, what Pink’s life could have been had her career not taken off, and whether or not it’s weird that Carolyn would totally get with Madonna (in theory) no matter how insufferable she is. You’ll have to listen to the whole episode to find out whether or not we all move in together by the end (or whether or not we figure out the VMAs). Oh, and this episode is definitely NOT sponsored by Norwegian or Spirit airlines.-Keep the podcast a-lez and gay by donating to our Patreon, where you can get some sapphic swag.-For related content, follow us on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and Leave Us a Review if you like what you hear!-Like our theme song? You’ll love the duo behind it: There Is No Mountain

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    Summer w/ Nicole Pasquale – Ep. 48 Aug 21, 2018

    Summer, the official season of the gays, is winding down, so Nicole Pasquale (UCB, Woke AF) stopped by to dyke out about the good, the bad, and the disgustingly humid parts of these few months. Plus, Nicole shares the magical details of a witchy getaway fueled by shrooms and a blood moon. What a time to be alive! We also talk about our butts getting touched during massages and the rediscovery of Carolyn’s internet friend from her chat room years. Lastly, we answer a listener question about body size and dating. Enjoy this episode before the season starts to change!-Keep the podcast a-lez and gay by donating to our Patreon, where you can get some sapphic swag.-For related content, follow us on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and Leave Us a Review if you like what you hear!-Like our theme song? You’ll love the duo behind it: There Is No Mountain











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    Activism w/ Amy Siskind – Ep. 47 Aug 14, 2018

    THE Amy Siskind (The New Agenda, The Weekly List) joins us to Dyke Out about activism in the face of an administration that’s worse than season 7 of The L Word (or Below Her Mouth which we discuss up top). Amy has been following and documenting the daily deluge of the harmful and #notnormal actions happening under this government, and we are just in awe of her ability to take on such an exhausting endeavor. We ask about how important it is to pay attention to what’s happening vs. ignoring it for your own sanity. And, on a scale of finding a girlfriend in Canada to stockpiling water for your soon-to-be-built doomsday bunker, how nervous do you need to be about Trump getting re-elected? We don’t want to give away too much, but this episode gave us the optimistic boost we’ve been needing! But before we talk about Amy, we dyke out about bad lesbian movies, the lesbian breakup heard ’round the internet, and how much we love Sharice Davids.
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    Money w/ Muna Mire – Ep. 46 Aug 06, 2018

    It makes the world go round but often leaves us feeling flat. Writer and producer Muna Mire (CondeNast, Teen Vogue, The Rundown With Robin Thede) joins us to talk about the struggles of being a queer person trying to pursue a creative career. Money is an uncomfortable thing for people to talk about, whether you have too much or not enough, so we try to uncover any ways in which we can make this topic a little less stigmatizing…and we aren’t sure if we succeeded. Carolyn also dykes out about seeing The Miseducation of Cameron Post and the preview for Lizzie (#Stewvigny4E), while Sarah recaps the glory of seeing Beyonce and her husband of lesser fame in concert. We also answer a listener question about dating while doing through a divorce.

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    Raised By Gay Moms w/ Lucas Connolly – ep. 45 Jul 30, 2018

    Comedian Lucas Connolly (Seeso’s New York’s Funniest Comedians) has FOUR gay moms, so we overlooked his affiliation with the patriarchy to have him come on the show and dyke out about his upbringing. We knew Lucas had a lot of moms, but what we didn’t know is that one of them is a well-known LGBT activist and politician (research fail)! We had so many questions, like what’s it like growing up in a queer household in Laramie, Wyoming, how did this affect his dating life, and what does he do on mother’s day??? But before we dig into gay mom territory, Carolyn talks about seeing Janelle Monae live, and Sarah wants the New York Post to LEAVE BRITNEY ALONE!!! Plus, we take a question from a listener who wants to explore the world as a lesbian, but her boyfriend is not onboard.-Keep the podcast a-lez and gay by donating to our Patreon, where you can get some sapphic swag.-For related content, follow us on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and Leave Us a Review if you like what you hear!-If you’re in NYC on August 6, come to Queer Film Theory 101 at House of Wax Bar to see Carolyn dissect all of the queer subtext in the movie My Girl.

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    Homoground w/ Lynn Casper – Ep. 44 Jul 24, 2018

    Lynn Casper, curator of queer indie music and founder/producer of Homoground, joins us to dyke out about how her popular and longstanding internet-radio-show-turned-podcast came to be. What’s different about music made by queer musicians? How has music by queer musicians changed and evolved over the years? Who should you be adding to your Spotify playlist right now? We recorded this episode before Carolyn left for vacation, when there was a chance she was walking into a parent trap situation and New York was on a mission to turn us all into puddles of sweat. Plus, learn Sarah’s ramen hack and wax nostalgic with us about Nickelodeon in the 90s. One last note, the show Carolyn plugged on Friday, July 27 is CANCELLED. So don’t show up at Under St. Marks that night…or do if you like surprises!

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    Comics Pt. 2 w/ Vita Ayala – Ep. 43 Jul 12, 2018

    And were back! Jet lag and time zones are the villains in this late-arriving second half of our Comics episode. Where did we leave off? Comic book writer Vita Ayala (DC comics, Black Mask Studios, Vault Comics, Valiant Comics) came by to talk about representation in comics and learned about their journey from young fan to writer. This episode, we continue the convo on cosplay, get Vita’s hot recs, crush hard on Neve Campbell, and answer a listener’s question. Best of all, we learn how the show Popular helped Vita realize how queer they were. Bam! Pow! Until next time… -Keep the podcast a-lez and gay by donating to our Patreon, where you can get some sapphic swag. -For related content, follow us on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and Leave Us a Review if you like what you hear!

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    Comics w/ Vita Ayala – Ep. 42, Part 1 Jul 03, 2018

    Holy podcast batman! Comic book writer Vita Ayala joins us for our first two part episode where we dyke out about – you guessed it – comics! Vita has written for DC comics, Black Mask Studios, Vault Comics, and Valiant Comics, and you should check out their most recent series, The Wilds. We cover so much ground, but spend the first chunk of the podcast talking about Beyonce and whether or not she has a magic touch, the dyke march, trolls, and comebacks. But when we get down to business, we learn all about Vita’s journey from believing Wonder Woman is Puerto Rican (it does make a lot of sense!), to them one day writing for Wonder Woman!!! Follow your dreams people. We also talk about how and why comics are becoming increasingly queer and intersectional, including bisexual Buffy because Carolyn loves to change the topic to Buffy whenever possible. Tune in next week for the second part of the episode where we get Vita’s hot recs, search for subtext, and answer a listener’s question. Wham-o!!!


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    Gaysians w/ Diane Chen – Ep. 41 Jun 26, 2018

    Actor, Director, Performer, and notable Gaysian Diane Chen dykes out with us about…well…Gaysians! After hearing Diane speak on several panels at Clexacon, we knew she’d be a gaymazing guest, and she delivered! We managed to talk for almost 75 minutes without a single mention of Hayley Kiyoko or Awkwafina, so before firing off your hate mail, we warned you! (Don’t worry, we’re just saving them for spotlight episodes because there’s too much to unpack.) But, we do talk a lot about the queerness of Mulan, family expectations, and Gaysian representation in media. Before we get to the meat of the episode, we discuss whether or not the term “gold star” should be used by lesbians. We also cover why kids should be kept under water, the perils of putting queer content on YouTube, the wonders of Tatiana Maslany, and which one of our past guests is headed down the aisle with her lady! Listen all the way until the end for our listener submitted question of the week.-Keep the podcast a-lez and gay by donating to our Patreon, where you can get some sapphic swag.-For related content, follow us on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and Leave Us a Review if you like what you hear!
    Dyking Out Pride Shirt






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    Modeling w/ Sarah Hartshorne – Ep. 40 Jun 19, 2018

    Is the modeling community extra queer, or is it just that everything surrounding Cara Delevingne seems supes gay? We ask comedian and former America’s Next Top Model contestant Sarah Hartshorne about the intersection of modeling and sexuality. From a small town in Western Massachusetts to beating out tens of thousands of women for a spot on our favorite Tyra Banks joint, Sarah H. shares the details of what things are like behind the scenes in modeling and reality tv. We also tackle age-old questions like “Is going to bed early a lesbian thing?”NEW YORKERS: OUR LIVE SHOW IS THIS WEEK THURSDAY, JUNE 21, 7:30 at The Peoples Improv Theater. Get Tickets HERE.-Keep the podcast a-lez and gay by donating to our Patreon, where you can get some sapphic swag.-For related content, follow us on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and Leave Us a Review if you like what you hear!BUY OUR OFFICIAL PRIDE SHIRT HERE











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    Soulmates w/ Morgan Miller – Ep. 39 Jun 12, 2018

    The UNIVERSE brought UCB’s Morgan Miller our way to dyke out about soulmates and why you can’t buy bedding at T.J. Maxx. Morgan is a hilarious comedian who has performed all over the country and has recently become more in tune with her spiritual side. Have you ever met someone and felt like you knew them in a past life? How do you know if you’ve met your soulmate? Morgan shares how she met hers, while Carolyn (yes, she’s calling herself Carolyn again) reflects on how her lack of belief in soulmates may have led to her divorce. And as a lesbian, how do you know the difference between a soulmate and a first date??? We also play a little game we like to call “Soulmate Material?”, admit our fears around Dinah Shore, and preach about the transformative qualities of submerging your naked body in waters of different temperatures.
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    BUY OUR OFFICIAL PRIDE SHIRT HERE
    Last week was hard. If you’re feeling down and have thoughts of suicide, please know you are not alone and find someone to talk to – a friend, family member, doctor, 1-800 number, or even an acquaintance who you think could be a good listener. You are more loved and less alone than you realize.

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    Sex With Dudes w/ Vivianne A. Njoku – Ep. 38 Jun 05, 2018

    Queer multimedia artist, activist and educator, Vivianne A. Njoku, joins us for one of the funnest episodes to date! Don’t be fooled by the topic (but do have your vomit bags ready if even the mere mention of dick activates your gag reflex), because we are dyking out hard on this one. We talk about everything from Mellisa Etheridge’s weed farm to the aging royal family, to a maybe murderous grandmother. Then, we guess why queer women who mostly date women resort to sleeping with men, and discuss the perils involved. What kind of men are queer women attracted to? Are their guidelines to sexual fluidity? If you could have virtual reality sex with a man, would you? ARE WE LIVING IN A SIMULATION?! Seriously though, this episode is wild and fun and one of our favorites for sure. We hope you enjoy it!

    PLUS, learn more about all the cool things Vivianne has going on:

    YouTube: Vivianne A. Njoku (https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCMlMF6A6Vm39h-vH1Kn1vdg)

    SHIFT: https://www.shiftthetrends.com

    Willie Mae Rock Camp: http://williemaerockcamp.org


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    Hair w/ Wazina Zondon – Ep. 37 May 29, 2018












    Wazina Zondon (HBO’s The Out List, Coming Out Muslim) swings by to talk about hair, and not just the kind on your head! We’re talking face, armpits, pubes, legs, arms – all of it. Do queer women feel the same pressure as straight women to be free of body hair? Where does that pressure some from? Porn? The patriarchy? Capitalism? Barbie? Hair removal is time consuming, painful, and expensive, so isn’t it time we took a stand, or should we just do what makes us comfortable? There’s so much to cover here! Yet we manage to also dyke out about hecklers, Calzona, and emo teenage moments.Keep the podcast a-lez and gay by donating to our Patreon, where you can get some sapphic swag.For related content, follow us on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and Leave Us a Review if you like what you hear!Check out Sudio, our sponsor for this episode. Use the code DYKE for 15% your purchase.











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    Femme Invisibility w/ Jacq The Stripper – Ep. 36 May 22, 2018

    Queer Bimbo(TM) Jacqueline Frances aka Jacq the Stripper graces the Dyking Out studio with her presence to talk about Femme Invisibility. Is it still even a thing? What kind of pressures do baby dykes face to look or conform to certain lesbian ideals? Do we all go through the vest phase? We revisit our Strippers topic as Jacq dishes about why women are terrible strip club patrons, and how the gig has helped her be true to her own identity when she’s off the stage. We also talk about Canada because when you have two Canadians in the same space, by law, they have to talk about. Plus, Carolyn rants about the terfs who attacked her on Twitter.Keep the podcast a-lez and gay by donating to our Patreon, where you can get some sapphic swag.For related content, follow us on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and Leave Us a Review if you like what you hear!Check out Sudio, our sponsor for this episode. Use the code DYKE for 15% your purchase.











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    Politics of Misogyny w/ Talia Lavin – Ep. 35 May 15, 2018












    The hilarious, smart, and talented Talia Lavin (The New Yorker, Village Voice, Jewish Daily Forward) joins us to dyke out about the everyday rage fire that is misogyny, specifically, how it plays into politics and how different parties deal with it. Talia drops some knowledge about fearless Stormy Daniels and her MMA fighter– er, lawyer, and she shares her thoughts on why it’s important to hold people accountable for misogynistic and abusive behavior. We also salivate over the movie Disobedience, praise Lena Waithe’s wardrobe choices, and Talia tells us about a sex toy that has her seeing sparks.Keep the podcast a-lez and gay by donating to our Patreon, where you can get some sapphic swag.For related content, follow us on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and Leave Us a Review if you like what you hear!Check out Sudio, our sponsor for this episode. Use the code DYKE for 15% your purchase.











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    Representation in Movies w/ Erin Greenwell – Ep. 34 May 01, 2018

    Filmmaker Erin Greenwell – yeah, that’s right. We totally know people who aren’t comedians. Anyway, Erin Greenwell (Director, Writer, Editor of My Best Day which premiered at Sundance in 2012) joins us to talk about how queer representation has changed in movies over the years. We’ve come a long way from All About Eve…or have we? Why does every queer movie have to be a forbidden love story? As a film professor, Erin pushes her students to be true to their experiences in hopes that it translates to authentic stories that real people can relate to. Hopefully that will lead to more movies being made that Sarah will actually watch so that she knows what Carolyn and Karina are ranting about half the time. We also touch on all things Joy Reid and our excitement over Disobedience…even though it’s just another queer forbidden love story. We’ll see!Keep the podcast a-lez and gay by donating to our Patreon, where you can get some sapphic swag.For related content, follow us on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and Leave Us a Review if you like what you hear!











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    Kids & Gender w/ Caitlin Ruppert – Ep. 33 Apr 23, 2018












    Three cis-gendered queer women without kids walk into a podcasting studio to talk about challenging gender norms and raising children. What could go wrong? Comedian and child-caregiver Caitlin Ruppert joins us to talk about why we need to stop shaming and correcting kids who act outside of gender norms. Also, who decided that trucks are for boys anyways when, newsflash, women are allowed to drive them too (at least in this country). Are gender reveal parties strictly a straight person thing? Why are people obsessed with the romantic lives of babies? (It does sound a little bit adorable…) We also talk about the terrible people who love forcing other to drink shots. If that’s you, KNOCK IT OFF.Keep the podcast a-lez and gay by donating to our Patreon, where you can get some sapphic swag.For related content, follow us on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and Leave Us a Review if you like what you hear!











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    Threesomes w/ Brooke Arnold – Ep. 32 Apr 17, 2018

    Three’s company in this episode all about threesomes. Comedian and recovering fundamentalist Brooke Arnold (Caroline’s on Broadway, Marie Claire, NYC Fringe Fest) dykes out with us about doing the deed with a party of 2. How do threesomes come about? Why do couples love asking lesbians to join them in bed? Is it possible for couples to have healthy threesomes that don’t ruin their relationship? Also, we expose Tall Texans for what it really is, a front for Lone Star dykes. And, Brooke spills the deets about her vagina dentata (sort of).Keep the podcast alive and gay by donating to our Patreon, where you can get some sapphic swag.For related content, follow us on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and Leave Us a Review if you like what you hear!











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    Young, Queer, & Famous w/ Sarah Pappalardo – Ep. 31 Apr 10, 2018












    Sarah Pappalardo, co-founder of Reductress, joins us to dyke out about all of the queer women of Hollywood, youtube, and wherever else you see cool entertainers who also happen to be women. Why is coming out different for these ladies? How are they so cool? Are the days of coming out on the cover of Time magazine ancient history? Give a listen as we share our hopes and dreams for the futures of the young, queer, and famous.Keep the podcast alive and gay by donating to our Patreon, where you can get some sapphic swag.For related content, follow us on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and Leave Us a Review if you like what you hear!











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    Pansexuality w/ Mindy Raf – Ep. 30 Apr 03, 2018

    Pansexual is no longer just the term once used to describe pixyland.org. It’s actually a sexual identity that an increasing number of people in the LGBTQ community identify with despite its anemic representation in mainstream media and pop culture. We’ve talked about it before, but wanted to invite quintuple threat Mindy Raf (TNT, VH1, MTV’s Girl Code) to dyke out about her pansexuality in more detail. We also revisit the topic of polyamory and do it much more justice than the first time around (sorry polys!). We hope you enjoy the discussion, and if not, then you can walk right out the fe-door-a (or just email us and tell us why). Plus, one of our hosts makes an exciting announcement that only her and her mom will probably care about! Tune in!Keep the podcast alive and gay by donating to our Patreon, where you can get some sapphic swag.For related content, follow us on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and Leave Us a Review if you like what you hear!











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    Sex w/ Emma Willmann – Ep. 29 Mar 27, 2018












    She plays the new girlfriend of the non-crazy ex-girlfriend on the CW’s Crazy Ex-Girlfriend, comedian Emma Willmann (Late Show, Sirius XM, NPR, HBO’s Crashing) drops by the Dyking Out studios to talk about sex…and comedy, and dating, and exes, and podcasts…but also sex. How do you figure out sexual boundaries? What role do toys play? What’s the right way to bring up STDs? Lesbian bed death? WHO’S THE MAN??? (SPOILER: It’s always Emma). Take a listen to this wild ride of an episode, and find out why Emma is a force on the comedy scene. Also…Keep the podcast alive and gay by donating to our Patreon.For related content, follow us on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and Leave Us a Review if you like what you hear!And if you love our theme song, check out the duo who created it, There Is No Mountain.











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    The Closet w/ Kelley Quinn – Ep. 28 Mar 20, 2018

    Because she’s no longer trapped in the closet, comedian Kelley Quinn (Upright Citizens Brigade) came to dyke out about what it’s like to have to keep your sexuality a secret. As many of us know, coming out is something that many in the LGBTQ community have to do over and over again. Can we envision a future where we no longer need to “come out” with our sexuality? What is the role of straight people in keeping us in the closet? Does anyone enjoy the closet? What about all the queers in Hollywood who keep dodging the issue? We also talk about whether or not a movie is an appropriate first date, and which cartoon characters were totes gay. Take a listen! Oh, and:Keep the podcast alive and gay by donating to our Patreon, where you can get some sapphic swag.For related content, follow us on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and Leave Us a Review if you like what you hear!And if you love our theme song, check out the duo who created it, There Is No Mountain.











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    Sex Ed w/ Alyssa Robbins – Ep. 27 Mar 13, 2018

    It’s our first guest who has a movie based on her life! Alyssa Robbins is a Brooklyn-based singer-songwriter and the inspiration behind the movie Becks. We are thrilled that she joined us to talk about her side gig teaching sex education to adolescents. Listen and learn how far we’ve come from putting condoms on bananas! We make a pretty solid case for the importance of comprehensive sex education in schools, and also get Alyssa’s insight on what to do if you have a kid who masturbates way too much. Later on in the episode, we dyke out about our favorite LGBTQ movies and try to make “spreadin’ the jam” a thing. Plus, if you’re in New York City on March 17, 2018, be sure to come out to see Alyssa in concert at Pete’s Candy Store in Brooklyn at 9pm.Keep the podcast alive and gay by donating to our Patreon, where you can get some sapphic swag.For related content, follow us on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and Leave Us a Review if you like what you hear!And if you love our theme song, check out the duo who created it, There Is No Mountain.

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    Teachers w/ Pat Brown – Ep. 26 Mar 09, 2018

    Fact: teachers make up 75% of the lesbian population – at least the lesbian population that Carolyn knows personally. We are thrilled to be joined by the incredible Pat Brown for this episode! She’s been on Late Night with Stephen Colbert, has been featured on AfterEllen.com, and has an amazing comedy album out now. We talk about the role of teachers in our lives and in the current political climate. Should they have guns at school? Do they know which kids are gay? Should they have guns at school knowing which kids are gay??? We also talk about Pat’s time attending the Grammy Awards! If we could have Pat on every week, we would. Take a listen and you’ll understand why.Keep the podcast alive and gay by donating to our Patreon.For related content, follow us on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and Leave Us a Review if you like what you hear!And if you love our theme song, check out the duo who created it, There Is No Mountain.











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    Dating Straight Women w/ J. Fox-Jones – Ep. 25 Feb 27, 2018












    Comedian and dater of straight women, J. Fox-Jones joins us this week to tell us why some lesbians end up with women who used to exclusively date men. Do lesbians seek out straight women as a challenge, or are these ladies hunting us down while we’re just minding our own business? If you date a straight woman, does that mean you have to *GULP* watch The Bachelor????!!! Does she assume you’ll handle things like installing shelves and killing bugs? We also give tips on how to watch Black Panther with a queer eye, and Sarah comes up with a radical alternative to watching movies…that just happens to sound a lot like TV.Keep the podcast alive and gay by donating to our Patreon.For related content, follow us on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and Leave Us a Review if you like what you hear!And if you love our theme song, check out the duo who created it, There Is No Mountain.











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    Pets w/ Becky Chicoine – Ep. 24 Feb 20, 2018

    Comedian Becky Chicoine (Comedy Central Comics to Watch, UCB) stops by the Dyking Out studio to talk about pets! Why do we get them? What happens to them when we’re going through a break-up? What makes a good pet name? Plus, learn what kind of gay lady you are based on your choice of pet as we play the game, What The Pet?!For related content, follow us on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and Leave Us a Review if you like what you hear!And if you love our theme song, check out the duo who created it, There Is No Mountain.











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    Catholic School w/ Nikki Palumbo – Ep. 23 Feb 13, 2018

    Comedy writer and proud gaytheist Nikki Palumbo (UCB, Above Average, Reductress) went to catholic school and lived to tell us about it. It turns out it’s not the lesbian underground we thought it was. How can one survive all the guilt and shame brought on by the church? How does a budding lesbian hide amongst the plaid skirts unnoticed? Are nuns even a little gay, and would they be offended that their calling is our backup plan when all else fails? We also dyke out about the super stressful experience of having to find a dude to go to prom with when it’s the last thing you want to be doing. Plus, Carolyn misremembers the plot points of one of her favorite movies.P.S. This episode was recorded on Jennifer Aniston’s birthday, and boy is that Aveeno lotion working wonders! We’d like to formally thank Jennifer for sending our new intern Karina our way! Don’t be a breeder, follow us on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and Leave Us a Review! (kidding! breeders welcome!)And if you love our theme song, check out the duo who created it, There Is No Mountain.











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    The L Word w/ Gwynna Forgham-Thrift – Ep. 22 Feb 06, 2018

    We tried to hold out as long as we could, but alas, it’s time to talk about the show that – love it or hate it – revolutionized the way the LGBTQ women were portrayed on TV. Comedian and filmmaker Gwynna Forgham-Thrift (UCB Maude Night) recently rewatched the entire series and could not wait to dyke out with us about it. How does the show hold up? What did it mean to us? How realistic was it? Where did they go wrong? Which sex scenes made us feel uncomfortable to watch with our moms in the room? What are our hopes for the reboot? If you haven’t seen the show, take a listen anyway as we tackle topics still relevant to all things LGBTQ like consent, transphopia, biphobia, butchphobia…so many phobias! And if you have seen the show, this episode is your chance to relive some of the highlights without having to listen to that damn theme song.Hey there! Don’t be a breeder, follow us on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and Leave Us a Review! (kidding! breeders welcome!)And if you love our theme song, check out the duo who created it, There Is No Mountain.











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    Straight Women w/ Kaitlin Fontana – Ep. 21 Jan 31, 2018

    Fresh off of her directorial debut at Sundance, writer/director/comedian/badass Kaitlin Fontana (The Box, A&E’s Black & White, Franchesca) joins us to let us know once and for all, what is the deal with straight women? Okay, maybe not once and for all because we barely scratched the surface of what it’s like for our straight allies out there drowning in a sea of dangerous dick. We ask Kaitlin what’s it like to have to play the role of girlfriend AND mother, and more importantly, what are men actually good for? The answers may just turn you straight! LOL JK. Kaitlin also enchants us with tales of polyamory and trying to find a sugar daddy. Tune in! Also, don’t be a breeder, follow us on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and Leave Us a Review! (kidding! breeders welcome!)











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    Performative Masculinity w/ Lorena Russi – Ep. 20 Jan 23, 2018

    Former pro soccer player, would-be Bobby Fischer and current hilarious comedian Lorena Russi (Late Night with Stephen Colbert, Spotify) joins us to talk about taxes, Lena Waithe, nazi haircuts and finally, our topic for this week! We attempt to tackle the messy and smelly world of performative masculinity while questioning how much of what we do is putting on an act or an imitation versus being true to who we are. We also struggle to answer the question of why so many lesbians aspire to look like teenage boys. Lastly, we’d like to apologize to Jennifer Aniston in advance for this episode and hope she doesn’t take anything we said personally.Don’t be a breeder, follow us on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and Leave Us a Review!











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    Strippers w/ Amber Rollo – Ep. 19 Jan 16, 2018

    How much do you know about women who strip? Before this episode, we knew at least one thing: many of them date other women. But what’s it really like to be the subject of the male gaze for pay? Stand up comedian and podcaster Amber Rollo dykes out with us about her former gig as a stripper (we learned that exotic dancer is NOT the preferred term). Needless to say, this episode is quite revealing! We also talk about the Golden Globes, dead lesbians, and the newly minted #MineToo movement that we’re hoping will gain traction.If you like us, follow us on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and Leave Us a Review!











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    Sexuality and the South w/ Jourdain Searles – Ep. 18 Jan 02, 2018

    Happy New Year! We’re back with an episode recorded in late 2017 but still very relevant. Many places in the South value tradition and religion, which means the region know for its hospitality is not so hospitable to the LGBTQ community. We’re joined by Augusta, Georgia native and comedian Jourdain Searles, and she dykes out about what it was like growing up as a queer black woman two hours outside of the more gay-friendly city of Atlanta. We also talk about Carolyn’s ongoing love/hate relationship with moviepass and how lesbian programming is the original Hallmark movie.Follow us on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and Leave Us a Review!











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    WNBA w/ Veronica Garza – Ep. 17 Dec 18, 2017


    Don’t pass over this slam dunk of an episode! Comedian and podcaster Veronica Garza joins us to dyke out about one of our favorite professional sports leagues, the WNBA. These players have talent, heart, and hustle, but the league is still young, so they don’t benefit from the same level of fame and fortune as their counterparts. But that doesn’t stop them from pushing forward and working harder than ever for their fans around the world. Oh, and did we mention a lot of the players are fellow lady lovers? If you love the WNBA, this episode is for you. If you don’t, listen anyway so we can make our case of why it’s great to be a fan. Also on the episode, Carolyn gushes about the new love interest in her life…a Dyson vacuum. Follow us on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and Leave Us a Review!











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    Hats w/ Alex Song – Ep. 16 Dec 12, 2017

    Alex Song (NBC’s Tonight Show with Jimmy Fallon, HBO’s Night of Too Many Stars, UCB) stops by to dyke out about the complicated relationship between lesbians and hats. Like a moth to a flame, our kind has been drawn to various hat styles. But what do a lesbian’s hat say about her? What if you don’t look good in hats, or like in Sarah’s case, your head is too damn big? What if feel the need to buy them but lack the confidence to wear them? You’ll find out all of this and more in our new segment ‘What the hat?!” We also discuss Moviepass and all the great movies out now. Plus, Carolyn reveals her #2 crush.Follow us on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and Leave Us a Review!











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    Lesbians on the Internet w/ Claudia Cogan – Ep. 15 Dec 05, 2017

    Comedian Claudia Cogan (Last Comic Standing semi-finalist) joins us to reflect on how the internet has affected the lives of lesbians – real lesbians. Not the ones on porn sites (though there’s a little mention of that). From AOL chat rooms to OurChart, the internet has allowed us to connect with other dykes (and maybe men pretending to be dykes) around the world, allowing us to explore our sexuality and develop a more rounded view of what it means to be a gay woman. But before we get to that, we also discuss the lesbian Starbucks cup controversy and why women are getting kicked off of Facebook for expressing their thoughts on men. And of course, we #namenames.Follow us on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and Leave Us a Review!











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    Law & Order w/ Megan Harney – Ep. 14 Nov 28, 2017

    From sodomy laws to gay marriage, to the right to use the bathroom that corresponds to your gender, legal cases have played a large role in the lives of LGBTQ people for centuries. While we’ve made many strides, there is still a long way to go to reach full equality under the law, and there are always those bigoted goblins looking to push us way the hell back. Lawyer Megan Harney joins us on this new episode to dyke out about current court cases that will have an impact on the community, and Carolyn finds a way to work Ally McBeal into the conversation. But before we tackle the heavy stuff, we dyke out about Legos, the movie My Girl, and Macaulay Culkin’s unmatched child acting skills. Follow us on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and Leave Us a Review!











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    Bisexuality w/ May Wilkerson – Ep. 13 Nov 20, 2017

    Do bisexuals have the best of both worlds, or the worst of all worlds? Reformed bisexual and comedian May Wilkerson (Someecards, Crazy; In Bed podcast, Caroline’s on Broadway) joins us to discuss her former life as a bisexual woman and why she now identifies as queer. We explore why bisexual people can’t seem to catch a break, and the many frustrations they face. What are the noticeable differences when comparing heterosexual and homosexual relationships? Also, are we just all one bad day away from being homeless? And what do women have in common with duck confit? All this and more in an episode that’s just craving attention and is probably just a phase.Follow us on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and Leave Us a Review!











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    Problematic Gay Men w/ Aisha Keller – Ep. 12 Nov 14, 2017

    Lesbians and gay men. Can we all just get along? Not if they insist on being unapologetically misogynistic! Friend of the podcast Aisha Keller joins us to dyke out about the problematic gay men we’ve come across. Can we get past our differences to focus on the causes that unite us? Will lesbians forever remain the butt of all jokes by Drag Queens? Can we talk about our favorite gay men without worrying about sexual assault allegations coming out against them? (Sadly, no) We also shame all of the states where we don’t have listeners. I’M LOOKING AT YOU NEW MEXICO! Dyke out with us now!Follow us on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and Leave Us a Review!











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    Mental Illness w/ Marisol Brady – ep. 11 Nov 07, 2017

    For many LGBTQ people, it’s easier to be out today than 20 years ago, but we still face alarming levels of suicide, mental illness, and substance abuse that often stem from systematic oppression and rampant bigotry. But it gets better, right? Comedian Marisol Brady joins us to dyke out about mental illness while Carolyn and Sarah self-diagnose themselves with ADHD. What’s it like to live with mental illness, and how do you support a partner who suffers from one? Does our society have unrealistic expectations of how we should think and feel that may lead to over diagnosis? Can you still walk around naked in your apartment if you have roommates? What is fan death? Listen to find out about all this and more! Follow us on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and Leave Us a Review!











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    Allies w/ Elsa Waithe – Ep. 10 Oct 31, 2017

    After a weeklong hiatus filled with lobster and crying, we’re back to tell you we don’t need allies, at least not as they are currently defined. Comedian and rad activist (ractivist?) Elsa Waithe (This American Life) dykes out with hosts Carolyn Bergier and Sarah York about the ins and outs of being an real ally. Does calling yourself an ally make you one? What should allies be willing to sacrifice? How can you take take part in everyday activism? Also, Elsa fills us in on how two combine activism with picking up chicks. Tune in now!Follow us on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and Leave Us a Review!











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    Religion w/ Eman El Husseini - Ep. 9 Oct 16, 2017

    Comedians Carolyn Bergier and Sarah York pray that you tune into our latest episode on Religion where the supremely funny and talented Eman El Husseini (Just For Laughs, Boston Comedy Festival) stops by to explain why she sometimes calls her parents ISIS. How has being queer changed our faith and relationship with religion? Can you be super gay and super religious? Are we all going to hell? Why is being a lesbian like eating tomatoes? We have faith that you’ll tune in to find out.Follow us on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and Leave Us a Review!










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    Marriage w/ Jess Salomon – Ep. 8 Oct 10, 2017

    Ever want to dyke out with someone for all of eternity? It’s not for everyone, but there are still a lot of people in the LGBTQ community who want to enter the traditional institution of marriage. Comedian Jess Salomon joins twice-married-Carolyn and will-marry-for-the-registry-Sarah to talk about same-sex marriage! Why do it? What’s the best thing about being married? We also discuss the fight for marriage equality in Australia (and how we think their political system works), super-predator Harvey Weinstein, and the pro-death culture of the United States.Follow us on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and Leave Us a Review!










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    Breakups w/ Ashley Gavin – Ep. 7 Oct 03, 2017

    Listen to Carolyn's new podcast Love's A Pitch on Spotify or Apple Podcasts.

    You are in for a treat this week as actor and standup Ashley Gavin (Gotham Comedy Live on AXS TV, FOX’s Laughs, SeeSo, SiriusXM Comedy Central Radio) dykes out with us about breakups! Should you try to be friends with your ex, skip a generation of exes, or cut them out like a cancerous tumor? Does the ‘winner’ or ‘loser’ get the stuff? How do you handle joint custody of pets? Could lesbianism saved Lindsay Lohan? We tackle all of this and more, as Carolyn questions her place in the studio with two alpha lesbians. Catch Carolyn and Sarah live at The Box Show’s season premiere at Littlefield in Brooklyn on Saturday, October 28, 2017.Follow us on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and Leave Us a Review!









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    Gender Identity w/ Jes Tom – Ep. 6 Sep 26, 2017

    We welcome stand-up comedian Jes Tom and dyke out about gender identity! Do gender roles exist in queer relationships? How do people react to different identities and what privileges come with them? But first, with so much to cover in current events, we spend a little too much time dyking out about Billie Jean King and Battle of the Sexes, the super gay Emmys, and how much republicans still hate gay people. Also, Carolyn finds a way to work Whitney Houston into the conversation, again. (hint: it has to do with Bisexual Awareness Week!)Follow us on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and Leave Us a Review!











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    Friendship w/ Wanjiko Eke – Ep. 5 Sep 19, 2017

    Comedian Wanjiko Eke joins us to dyke out about friendship! Can women who love women be just friends? What’s it like to be a straight girl’s lesbian bestie? Do lesbians all fall for their straight friends? (They don’t). But before we get to our topic, we get derailed by dyking out over Edie Windsor and honorary lesbian Hillary Clinton. We also field a question from a listener about how parents can be supportive of their children if they come out on day. Follow us on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and Leave Us a Review!


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    Dealing with Straight Men w/ Sydnee Washington – Ep. 4 Sep 11, 2017

    We are joined by comedian Sydnee Washington to dyke out about the burden of the uninvited straight men in our lives. We also talk about Jay-Z’s mom, lesbians with roosters, and the new season of American Horror Story.Follow us on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and Leave Us a Review!

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    Polyamory w/ comedian Chewy May – Ep. 3 Sep 05, 2017

    Note: This episode does not do a great job of discussing polyamory, and we will definitely revisit the topic again. Our Pansexuality episode does a better job for now.

    Stand up comedian Chewy May joins us to talk about her experiences with polyamory, and we debate whether or not Carolyn is cool enough to be in an open relationship (spoiler: she’s not). We also discuss gay rights in Louisiana, the female Lord of the Flies reboot, and what straight women are doing to their eyebrows. Follow us on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and Leave Us a Review!










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    Coming Out, w/ comedian Sarah Kennedy – Ep. 2 Sep 03, 2017

    Listen to Carolyn's new podcast Love's A Pitch on Spotify or Apple Podcasts.


    We dyke out with stand up comedian and host of the Dwellin’ on Ellen podcast, Sarah Kennedy on the topic of coming out. We also reminisce about the gayest moments in MTV VMA history, talk about male feminists and the criticism of Joss Whedon, and share our theories on Taylor Swift’s sexuality.Follow us on Twitter, Facebook, Instagram, and Leave Us a Review!









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