Crime Pays But Botany Doesn't

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**Crime Pays But Botany Doesn’t**

Why do some plants grow where they do? How can geology cause new plant species to evolve? Why are some plants pollinated by flies, some by bats, some by birds, and others by bees? How does a plant evolve to look like a rock? How can destroying lawns soothe the soul? This is a show about plants and plant habitat through the lens of natural selection and ecology, with a side of neurotic ranting, light humor, occasional profanity, & the perpetual search for the filthiest taqueria bathroom.

Latest Episodes:

Texas Blackout, Cloud Forest Blueberries, Tropical Mistletoes Feb 25, 2021

Show notes

Rants about hating Ted Cruz, Pine Forests of Hispaniola, Watching Plants Melt during the Texas Blackouts, etc

Baby I Wanna Be Your Karstic Dog Feb 09, 2021

Show notes

Recorded in the Dominican Republic while exploring Dogtooth Limestone Karst formations and contracting urushiol-induced atopic dermatitis, here we rant about the endemic Flora of the Dominican Republic, why Dominicans drive like maniacs and why it's comforting. We talk high elevation neotropical cloud forests with the climate of Northern Coastal California, we talk low elevation coastal plain tree cacti and getting stung by cool endemic wasps.

Mycorrhizae, Ericoid Roots, Orchids, Meathead Psychology, etc Jan 25, 2021

Show notes

Listen to 80 minute rant on Ericoid roots and fungal symbiosis with a guest appearance by Peter Bernhardt. We also briefly talk about the germination of orchid seeds, the huge importance and understudy of the Fungal Division Glomeromycota, and why a moron would spend 4 grand to get his truck lifted.

PLANT SYSTEMATICS with Michael Simpson Jan 20, 2021

Show notes

Michael Simpson is a Professor Emeritus of Botany who is the Author of one of the best textbooks available on the evolutionary history, grouping and Identification of plant species - Plant Systematics.
Taxonomy, Evolution, & Diversity of Plants on Earth? What are phylogenetics? What is a "biogeography dungeon" and why is it fascinating as shit to be trapped inside? What causes one to go down a wormhole of obsession with the various forms that plants can take?

Geologist Robert Madden Jan 14, 2021

Show notes

Dr. Robert Madden is a geologist and teacher based out of Perth, Western Australia.

Evolution, Speciation and Child Labor Jan 11, 2021

Show notes

Rants on the wonders of plant evolution, ecotypes, speciation, and whether an awareness and fascination with such could have prevented some members of the mayonnaise militia from being radicalized. Plenty of book recommendations and other disjointed rants.

Talking Railroads & Mexico with Linda Niemann Dec 22, 2020

Show notes

Linda Niemann is an author, ex-railroader/brakeman and former English professor at Kennesaw State University. She is the author of the books Boomer, Railroad Voices, Railroad Noir and Cosas: Folk Art Travel in Mexico.

Blazing East to South Texas Dec 19, 2020

Show notes

Rants on Cactus Phylogeny, Teddy Bear Cholla, Neobuxbaumia Dungeons of Oaxaca, transporting plants in storage bins, over-crowded hiking/wilderness areas, how idiotic the word "natural" is, crazy cat ladies and cat colonies on ecologically-sensitive public lands, and how Great Basin National Park is declaring a war on Christmas by refusing to string lights up on Pinus longaeva, as heard through the voice of Jerry Woznowski.

Interview w/climatologist Daniel Swain Dec 10, 2020

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A fascinating and educational 68 minutes that breaks down the mechanisms of California's weather and where it might be headed in the future.

California Dystopia, Butano Cypress, Seed-Collection, Edibles & Trash Tvetc Dec 08, 2020

Show notes

Rants about California Dystopia, Proper Seed Collection, Drought, Butano Cypress (biogeography rant), etc