Creating a Family: Talk about Adoption, Foster & Kinship Care

Latest Episodes:

Can You Adopt a Baby From Foster Care? - Weekend Wisdom Nov 12, 2023

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This podcast is produced by www.CreatingaFamily.org. We are a national non-profit with the mission to strengthen and inspire adoptive, foster & kinship parents and the professionals who support them. Creating a Family brings you the following trauma-informed, expert-based content:

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Resource pages on all aspects of family building

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Please leave us a rating or review. This podcast is produced by www.CreatingaFamily.org. We are a national non-profit with the mission to strengthen and inspire adoptive, foster & kinship parents and the professionals who support them.
Creating a Family brings you the following trauma-informed, expert-based content:

Weekly podcasts
Weekly articles/blog posts
Resource pages on all aspects of family building

Adopting a Child From Another State Nov 08, 2023

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If you are thinking about adoption, you've likely considered the possibility that you will be adopting a child in another state. In this episode, we talk about everything involved with this process. Our guests are Jim Thompson, an adoption attorney and the author of the book South Carolina Adoption Law and Practice. He has been a Fellow of the Academy of Adoption & Assisted Reproduction Attorneys since 1993 and Joan Smith, the District Supervisor of the Pittsburgh office of Adoptions From the Heart.
In this episode, we cover:
Infant Adoption

Is it possible to adopt an infant in another state?
How does a prospective adoptive parent find an expectant mother in another state?
What things must prospective adoptive parents be cautious of when looking for expectant parents in another state, especially if they are not working with an adoption professional?
How does the domestic infant adoption process differ when the adoptive parents and the expectant moms live in different states?
What is the Interstate Compact for the Placement of Children (ICPC)?
What are the steps on the ICPC as it applies to domestic infant adoption?
What state’s adoption laws will be used for the adoption?
How long should adoptive parents expect the ICPC process to take?

Adopting from Foster Care (relative adoption and non-relative adoptions)

Is it possible to adopt a child from foster care in another state?
Can you foster a child in foster care in another state?
How do you find a child in foster care in another state legally free to adopt?
How does the foster care adoption process differ when the prospective adoptive parents and the child live in different states?
What are the steps with the ICPC as it applies to foster care adoption?
How do visitations between the adoptive family and the child work?
How are adoption subsidies handled when adopting a foster child from another state?
Which state pays the adoption subsidy?
How are health care benefits or Medicaid handled?

Resources:
AdoptUSKids Understanding Interstate Adoption
This podcast is produced by www.CreatingaFamily.org. We are a national non-profit with the mission to strengthen and inspire adoptive, foster & kinship parents and the professionals who support them. Creating a Family brings you the following trauma-informed, expert-based content:

Weekly podcasts
Weekly articles/blog posts
Resource pages on all aspects of family building

Please leave us a rating or review RateThisPodcast.com/creatingafamily

Support the show

Weekly podcasts
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Resource pages on all aspects of family building

What Is Happening with International Adoptions? - Weekend Wisdom Nov 05, 2023

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Adoption Disruptions & Dissolutions, How to Prevent and When to Accept Nov 01, 2023

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Do you worry that you've gotten in over your head by adopting this child. Are you about ready to give up. Or do you want to do everything possible to make sure that your adoption doesn't fall apart? Join us to talk with Dr. Eshele Williams, Director of the Creating Stability During Change Model of Practice for Resource Family Disruption Prevention and Retention. She was also a birth child in foster adoptive kinship family. Dr. Eileen Pasztor is a Prof. Emerita, California State University at Long Beach School of Social Work, and foster and adoptive parent.
In this episode, we cover:

What terms do we use for an adoption that falls apart? What is the distinction between adoption dissolution and adoption disruption?
What does the research show about how common adoption dissolutions are?
What are the stages a family goes through before they decide to end an adoption?
Why do families struggle post-adoption to the point of considering dissolving the adoption?
- CWLA's new Compendium book chapter on adoption in the section on Trending Topics and Issues relating to disruption and dissolution. “Studies that have examined the risk factors related to disruption and dissolution reveal multiple reasons for postadoption instability, including factors relating to the children, their families, and the agencies (White, 2016).
- Unrealistic expectations. Not fully understanding the impact of trauma.
  - How can we help families manage expectations and form realistic expectations prior to the adoption?
  - It’s easy to “blame” the child, but what can parents do to prepare in advance for some of the possible realities of adopting a child?
- Child behavioral issues (Physical issues are seldom the cause for an adoption failing. Emotional issues are a far more common cause.)
- Issues between children already in the family with the new child.
- Lack of adequate resources and support and a family’s ability to pay for them.
- Lack of insurance coverage for mental health.
- Marital strains caused by parenting a child who has challenging behaviors.
Steps to Stability
Prevention/Intervention strategies?
Where should families go for help if they are struggling?
How can families know when they have given it enough time?
If you believe that an adoption is going to fail, what steps should a parent take to make it less damaging to the child?
Who should the families first contact when they have made up their minds?
How to dissolve an adoption legally?
Parents worry about being found negligent and/or paying child support. How realistic is that fear?
What if parents want to dissolve the adoption to get help in paying for the treatment that their child needs but would still like to remain in the child’s life?
How can we support families before they give up?

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Advice from Experts If You Haven't Gotten an Adoption Match - Weekend Wisdom Oct 29, 2023

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Q: We’ve applied to adopt an infant but haven’t received a match. What can we do?
Resources:

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The Holidays with Adopted, Foster, or Kinship Kids Who've Been Exposed to Trauma Oct 25, 2023

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Does it feel like your child is sabotaging the holidays? Are there more tantrums, sullenness, and anxiety during the holiday season? We explore why and what to do about it with Rebecca Robotham, a Licensed Clinical Social Worker at Beehive Counseling & Wellness in Connecticut. She is also an adoptee and former foster child.
In this episode, we cover:

There are many sources of trauma for children, and many adopted and foster children have experienced trauma before they come to our homes. We’re talking neglect, prenatal exposure, abuse, domestic violence, and the actual act of being removed from your parents.
How can trauma impact children? Both physically and emotionally?
What is it about the holidays that makes it hard for kids with trauma? (change in routine, lots of people, bringing up memories, over-stimulation, change in diet, distracted parents, build-up of anticipation, let down after the fact…)
What type of behaviors might you see? (more tantrums, dysregulation, “sabotaging” the holidays, sibling bickering, depression, sullenness, anxiety, …)
How can families do the holidays differently to help kids who have experienced trauma?

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How to Become a Foster Parent - Weekend Wisdom Oct 22, 2023

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Q: Now that our youngest is in high school, we want to become foster parents but don’t know where to begin.
Resources:

How to Choose an Adoption Agency (Guide)
Becoming a Foster Parent (Resource page)
Working as Part of a Foster Care Team (Resource page)
Suggested Books for Foster Care Parents

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Adoption Scams: How to Recognize and Prevent Oct 18, 2023

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Do you worry about being scammed in a domestic infant adoption? How can you prevent scams and recognize red flags for a failed adoption match? Join us to talk with Colleen Quinn, an adoption attorney at the Adoption & Surrogacy Law Center in Richmond, VA, with 34 years of experience in adoption law. She is the co-author of the last five editions of the VA CLE Adoption Procedures and Forms.

In this episode, we discuss:

Adoption scams can fall into four general categories:
- those against adoptive parents by expectant or supposedly pregnant women,
- those by brokers or facilitators who are not licensed or may not be legal,
- those by adoption agencies and attorneys agains adoptive parents.
- those done by adoptive against expectant/birth parents.
What are the typical adoption scams perpetrated by expectant women against prospective adoptive parents or adoption agencies or attorneys?
How much can adoptive parents pay an expectant mother for living expenses, clothes, transportation, food, etc.?
What are some ways to prevent being scammed. Red flags for an adoption scam?
- Insist on Video calls and then move to in-person meetings.
- Ask for HiPPA release to see medical records
- Don’t provide cash directly to the expectant parent.
- Work with an experienced adoption agency or adoption attorney.
What should adoptive families know and ask about unidentified birth fathers?
What are ways adoptive parents can prevent becoming a victim of an adoption scam or adoption fraud?
What are warning signs that an expectant woman does not plan to go through with the adoption? Note that this is not necessarily or even commonly the same thing as an adoption scam.
- Watch for the placing parents wanting to name the child.
- Wanting to take the baby home for a few days.
- Terms used by the expectant parent—your baby vs. my family.
- If placing their 3rd or 4th child more often not to place a full sibling and the couple is still to
- Secrecy Not telling her mom
- Grandmom doesn’t agree with placement
- How soon they fill out the forms that we send.
- Slow walk the Hippa forms.
- Not following through with their attorney
- More fall through with adoptive parents
- Not getting good adoption options counseling in person that asks the hard questions. This type of counseling really help her think through.
- Overly or under-emotional about the adoption plan.
While not necessarily a scam, how common is it for expectant mothers to not be fully open about prenatal exposure to drugs or alcohol?
Acts by brokers or facilitators who are not acting legally?
Acts by adoption agencies and attorneys against adoptive parents.
Adoption scams/fraud against expectant parents or birth parents? (open adoption, fertility treatment, back out of the arrangement)

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Tips for Creating Attachment - Weekend Wisdom Oct 15, 2023

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Q. We took in my cousin’s 4-year-old last month. We thought it might be temporary, but it’s looking like it will be for a long time and maybe forever. The problem is that this little boy has gone through a lot because his mom is a drug user and never really was a parent. He is very withdrawn and doesn’t seem to want to attach or let us get close in any way. Any help would be appreciated.
Resources:

Attachment Help (Resource)
6 Tips for Creating Attachment (Article)
Parenting the Challenging Child While Maintaining Attachment (Free Course)

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Foster Care Adoption Subsidies Oct 11, 2023

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Are you hoping to adopt from foster care. Don't miss this discussion of adoption subsidies with Josh Kroll, Project Coordinator for the Adoption Subsidy Resource Center at Families Rising (formerly known as the North American Council on Adoptable Children).
In this episode, we cover:

What are adoption subsidies?
What other names are used for “adoption subsidies”? Adoption Agreements, Adoption Assistance, AAP, monthly stipend. Is there a difference between these?
Who is eligible for foster care adoption subsidies?
Are private adoptions eligible for adoption subsidies? What if the private adoption is of a child with special needs?
Supplemental Security Income (SSI).
Is there an income limit for receiving an adoption subsidy?
How is the dollar amount of the subsidy determined, and by whom?
Can kinship providers receive foster care adoption subsidies?
What other things can be included in an adoption subsidy agreement other than a monetary monthly stipend?
Does the money have to be spent directly and solely on the foster child, or can it be used to benefit the whole family or the foster child only tangentially—such as adding a bedroom so that kids don’t have to share or a family vacation?
What about situations where the child is either too young to be displaying needs or is not displaying needs, but the parents have reason to believe that the child will have needs as they age? How can they negotiate for future needs?
How to handle adoption subsidies when you are adopting an infant with prenatal exposure to alcohol or drugs?
What other type of things might be included in adoption assistance? College tuition assistance/grant/tuition waiver?
How is residential treatment covered?
What if you face a difficult negotiation?
How can people get information about what particular states usually grant for adoption subsidies? https://nacac.org/help/adoption-assistance/
How are adoption assistance/adoption subsidies handled if I’m adopting a foster child from another state?
What should adoptive parents do if they believe that the adoption subsidy that is being offered is not enough?