Courage and Spice

Latest Episodes:

Changing Unhealthy Beliefs Oct 31, 2019

Show notes

Cognitive Restructuring is based on the principle that how we feel emotionally and what we do behaviourally, is not the result of what happens to us, but instead, it’s down to how we think about what happens to us.

This means that we can change how we feel and what we do by changing what we believe about what happens to us.

Practising this is freaking ace!

It helps us to slow down and become more aware of our negative self-talk and unhealthy beliefs. This makes it so much easier to unpack unconscious beliefs so we can intentionally and consciously change them.

This is part two of a three-part podcast mini-series! Next week I’ll walk you through a cognitive restructuring process so you can use this in your life.

This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit saspetherick.substack.com

Upgrade Your Self-talk Oct 24, 2019

Show notes

Your voice is the one you hear most often, is it kind?

So much mental and emotional suffering comes from the way we talk to ourselves in our own minds.

Over time, the beliefs and behaviours we repeat to ourselves become habitual. Just like we all have physical habits—brushing our teeth before bed, twirling our hair when we’re nervous —we all have psychological habits too.

One of our common psychological habits is the way of talking to ourselves.

This episode is all about the most common types of negative self-talk (sometimes called Cognitive Distortions), and some strategies you can use to identify and start to change your own unhelpful negative voice and upgrade your self-talk!

This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit saspetherick.substack.com

Unconditional Self-acceptance Oct 17, 2019

Show notes

Unconditional Self-acceptance means that we fully and unconditionally accept ourselves regardless of our competence, and whether or not other people approve, respect, or love us.

With self-acceptance, if we mess up, we understand that we’ve messed up. That’s it. No unfavourable judgement. No feeling bad. Hence, no constant fluctuation in self-worth. We start to experience the world differently. If we don’t get what we want, we are still ok.

With unconditional self-acceptance, you are interested in learning from specific beliefs, behaviours and outcomes but your unique you-ness is never up for debate. You become the constant in your own life.

In this episode we explore what Unconditional Self-acceptance looks like, it's many benefits and importantly: how to begin to cultivate it!

This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit saspetherick.substack.com

The Myth of Self-esteem Oct 03, 2019

Show notes

High self-esteem is something many of us desire, its the source of a squillion Pinterest quotes, we tend to worry if our kids don’t have enough of it, it seems to be the secret to professional and personal achievements which is probably why parents, teachers, therapists and coaches bang-on about its many benefits.

But does self-esteem actually make us happier, healthier, more successful?

In this episode, we go on a magical mystery tour of the self-esteem movement: where it came from, the surprising research findings and how self-esteem moved out of the realm of psychological research and into Infomercials and Oprah guests.

This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit saspetherick.substack.com

The Protector Sep 26, 2019

Show notes

Self-doubt is often characterised as an inner-critic or self-saboteur, but its SO much more sophisticated than that!

In this episode, I introduce the concept of The Protector: a characterisation of self-doubt that you can meet with creativity and compassion.

I share five key aspects of this part of your psyche including ideas for how to develop your relationship.

This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit saspetherick.substack.com

Owning Your Preferences Sep 19, 2019

Show notes

A personal episode for me this week. I share how I have come to really own my preferences: from NOT camping to learning how to say a clean and boundaried 'no'.

Twas not always thus! I sometimes joke that I am a Recovering People Pleaser, but I don't want to make light of what has been a huge developmental process. To own our preferences we must make peace with the possibility that we will be disliked, we'll create tension and conflict, and we may be rejected.

But even though all these things have happened, it's still worth it to be me, in every context, all the time.

In this episode, I share how I uncovered the root causes of this aspect of my self-doubt, how healing these events was just the beginning.

This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit saspetherick.substack.com

Is it my gut feeling or my self-doubt? Sep 12, 2019

Show notes

In this episode, I share why it's easy to get confused between your gut feeling and your self-doubt.

This is particularly tricky when we are learning something new!

Using Broadwell's model of competence we explore when your gut feeling is most reliable and how to tap into what it's telling you.

This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit saspetherick.substack.com

The Big Seven Risks Sep 05, 2019

Show notes

It's episode 50 and two years since beginning the podcast! I thought it would be fun to revisit the very first episode: The Five P's of Self-doubt.

In the first episode, I (somewhat tentatively!) shared my framework for how self-doubt works - how it responds to psychological risk and how we use the Five P's to keep ourselves safe from that risk. In this episode, I share how my theory has evolved in the last few years.

I've been exploring the concept of psychological risk, looking at how this operates and the consequences of it. These findings have updated my original framework, added an additional 'P', and led to this episode.

This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit saspetherick.substack.com

Reality is Neutral Aug 29, 2019

Show notes

If you have a vociferous inner-critic, this episode is for you!

Everything outside of you, is neutral. It just IS. How you experience the world, is how you interpret it. Usually, we don't just have an experience, we have a lot of thoughts, feelings, judgements about the experience!

In this episode, I share how most of us were never taught to be consciously aware of how we interpret neutral reality. Plus I share a practice for you try!

This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit saspetherick.substack.com

Confidence is a Consequence Aug 23, 2019

Show notes

The question I am asked The Most about my work is 'how can I feel more confident right now?' And in this episode, I'm answering the question!

Most of us want to feel confident so we can do and say what we want to do and say. We have some imaginary version of what would be possible if we had more confidence: who we would be, much more awesome our lives would be. But what most of us don’t realise is that confidence is a consequence of other things. It never comes first.

I'm sharing how I have come to understand the process by which confidence is cultivated, how I see this process as a pyramid.

There are five layers on top of each other - like building blocks - and confidence is the final block at the top of the pyramid.

This is a public episode. If you would like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit saspetherick.substack.com

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