Breaking Free from Narcissistic Abuse

Latest Episodes:

My Abusive Husband Claims He’s Trauma-Bonded to Me! Nov 06, 2025

Show notes

“My abuser claims he’s ‘trauma bonded’ to me…Can that be true?

This week’s Fan Mail question comes from a listener on YouTube who wants to know how common it is for an abusive partner to be trauma bonded. Hers claims to be. She’s wonders if this true or if her partner is attempting to dodge responsibility.

Submit Your Question

If you’d like your question addressed on air, send it here:

👉 https://kerrymcavoyphd.fillout.com/fan-mail

Submit your question to be answered on air here!

Resources

The Complete Recovery Collection: Narcissistic abuse resources
First Steps to Leaving: Online self-paced digital course
Toxic-Free Relationship Club: Live coaching & community support

Follow Kerry!

Kerry Kerr McAvoy, Ph.D., an author and educator, helps listeners decode toxic dynamics, recognize manipulation, and rebuild self-trust.

As an Amazon affiliate, commission is earned from qualifying purchases.

This podcast/video is for educational purposes only. It does not constitute therapy, counseling, or professional mental health advice, nor does listening create a doctor-patient or therapist-client relationship. If you or someone you know is in immediate danger, please call 911 or contact the Suicide & Crisis Lifeline by calling or texting 988 (US/Canada).

Has Your Adult Child Gone No Contact? Here's How to Rebuild That Damaged Relationship Nov 03, 2025

Show notes

Has your adult child gone no contact? Cut off all communication with you? Are you struggling to figure out how to repair things with them?

This week, psychologist and author Dr. Joshua Coleman, author of Rules of Estrangement, joins Dr. Kerry to unpack why estrangement is on the rise and what actually helps parents reopen the door.

Podcast Extra Exclusive Interview

Find the exclusive second segment and weekly newsletter here.

More About the Podcast Extra Interview

🔹 In this members-only bonus, Dr. Joshua Coleman offers practical solutions, like boundary scripts, de-escalation moves, and how to say “no” to money requests.

👉 Get immediate access to this extended interview.

MORE ABOUT DR. JOSH COLEMAN

DR. JOSHUA COLEMAN is a psychologist in private practice in the San Francisco Bay Area and a Senior Fellow with the Council on Contemporary Families.

Submit your question to be answered on air here!

Resources

The Complete Recovery Collection: Narcissistic abuse resources
First Steps to Leaving: Online self-paced digital course
Toxic-Free Relationship Club: Live coaching & community support

Follow Kerry!

Kerry Kerr McAvoy, Ph.D., an author and educator, helps listeners decode toxic dynamics, recognize manipulation, and rebuild self-trust.

As an Amazon affiliate, commission is earned from qualifying purchases.

Can a Psychopath ‘Choose’ to Be a Good Person? Oct 30, 2025

Show notes

“Can narcissists or psychopaths ever live moral lives?”

This week’s Fan Mail question comes from a listener who asks: “Do you think there are some narcissists or psychopaths who genuinely try to live moral lives—perhaps guided by religion or conscience—or are they all just pretending?”

Her question was prompted by years of watching her ex, a man she believes to be a malignant narcissist, play the part of a “righteous” and religious man in public while being manipulative and cruel in private.

In this episode, Dr. Kerry explores the complex intersection between moral development, conscience, and personality disorders.

Submit Your Question

If you’d like your question addressed on air, send it here: 👉 https://kerrymcavoyphd.fillout.com/fan-mail

Submit your question to be answered on air here!

Resources

The Complete Recovery Collection: Narcissistic abuse resources
First Steps to Leaving: Online self-paced digital course
Toxic-Free Relationship Club: Live coaching & community support

Follow Kerry!

Kerry Kerr McAvoy, Ph.D., an author and educator, helps listeners decode toxic dynamics, recognize manipulation, and rebuild self-trust.

As an Amazon affiliate, commission is earned from qualifying purchases.

Why You Keep Picking Narcissists and What to Do About It, Featuring Jessica Baum Oct 27, 2025

Show notes

Ever wonder why you keep attracting the same kind of person—the ones who feel magnetic at first but end up draining you emotionally?

This week, therapist and author Jessica Baum, creator of Anxiously Attached and SAFE: An Attachment-Informed Guide to Building Secure Relationships, joins Dr. Kerry to explore the hidden attachment wounds that pull us toward toxic partners.

Podcast Extra Exclusive Interview

Find the exclusive second segment and weekly newsletter here.

More About the Podcast Extra Interview

🔹 What does healing really look like after a narcissistic or toxic relationship? In this members-only bonus, therapist and author Jessica Baum dives deep into the real work of recovery—how safety, connection, and self-compassion rebuild what trauma once broke.

👉 Get immediate access to this extended interview: https://substack.com/@breakingfreenarcabuse

MORE ABOUT JESSICA BAUM

JESSICA BAUM, is a licensed psychotherapist whose journey began with a lifelong curiosity about the “Whys” of life—why we feel, connect, and experience the world the way we do.

Submit your question to be answered on air here!

Resources

The Complete Recovery Collection: Narcissistic abuse resources
First Steps to Leaving: Online self-paced digital course
Toxic-Free Relationship Club: Live coaching & community support

Follow Kerry!

Kerry Kerr McAvoy, Ph.D., an author and educator, helps listeners decode toxic dynamics, recognize manipulation, and rebuild self-trust.

As an Amazon affiliate, commission is earned from qualifying purchases.

Why I Stopped Being the Perfect Wife and Daughter-in-Law Oct 23, 2025

Show notes

“How can someone seem loving for years—then suddenly turn cruel?”

This week’s Fan Mail revisits a letter that struck a nerve with listeners. A woman wrote about her daughter-in-law, who had seemed like a wonderful addition to the family for seven years—until she “suddenly turned into a monster.”

But after the episode aired, Dr. Kerry received another listener’s response who offered the opposite perspective: “I was in a 23-year marriage marked by coercive control and escalating abuse. My in-laws adored me—until I began calling out my husband’s behavior. Then they rallied around him and turned on me.”

In this episode, Dr. Kerry unpacks six possible explanations for why someone may seem to “suddenly change” in a relationship or family dynamic.

Submit Your Question

If you’d like your question addressed on air, send it here:

👉 https://kerrymcavoyphd.fillout.com/fan-mail

Submit your question to be answered on air here!

Resources

The Complete Recovery Collection: Narcissistic abuse resources
First Steps to Leaving: Online self-paced digital course
Toxic-Free Relationship Club: Live coaching & community support

Follow Kerry!

Kerry Kerr McAvoy, Ph.D., an author and educator, helps listeners decode toxic dynamics, recognize manipulation, and rebuild self-trust.

As an Amazon affiliate, commission is earned from qualifying purchases.

Can You Spot the 5 Types of People Who Could Ruin Your Life? Here's Bill Eddy's List Oct 20, 2025

Show notes

Ever feel blindsided by someone who seemed charming, helpful, or even caring—only to realize later they were quietly dismantling your peace?

This week, conflict expert Bill Eddy, author of The Five Types of People That Ruin Your Life, joins Dr. Kerry to unpack the five high-conflict personality types most likely to cause chaos in relationships, workplaces, and families.

Podcast Extra Exclusive Interview

Find the exclusive second segment and weekly newsletter here.

More About the Podcast Extra Interview

🔹 What do you do when walking away from a toxic or high-conflict person feels impossible? In this members-only bonus,

👉 Get immediate access to this extended interview: https://substack.com/@breakingfreenarcabuse

MORE ABOUT BILL EDDY

Website

Book - 5 Types of People Who Can Ruin Your Life: Identifying and Dealing with Narcissists, Sociopaths, and Other High-Conflict Personalities

BILL EDDY, LCSW, Esq. is HCI’s co-founder and Director of Innovation. While pioneering High Conflict Personality Theory (HCP), he was the National Conflict Resolution Center’s Senior Family Mediator for 15 years, a Certified Family Law Specialist for 15 years, and a licensed clinical social worker and therapist for over 12 years.

Submit your question to be answered on air here!

Resources

The Complete Recovery Collection: Narcissistic abuse resources
First Steps to Leaving: Online self-paced digital course
Toxic-Free Relationship Club: Live coaching & community support

Follow Kerry!

Kerry Kerr McAvoy, Ph.D., an author and educator, helps listeners decode toxic dynamics, recognize manipulation, and rebuild self-trust.

As an Amazon affiliate, commission is earned from qualifying purchases.

My Ex is Blaming Me For His Broken Relationships With Our Kids Oct 16, 2025

Show notes

“Why does my ex always blame me when the kids want nothing to do with him?”

This week’s Fan Mail comes from a listener in Rochester, New York, who writes about the heartbreak of watching her children pull away from their abusive father, only to be blamed for it.

Her ex insists she’s turned the kids against him, while his family defends him as “such a good man” who’s “done so much for us.”

In this episode, Dr. Kerry explains how emotionally immature and abusive individuals deflect accountability, making others feel guilty for the natural consequences of their own harmful behavior.

Submit Your Question

If you’d like your question addressed on air, send it here:

👉 https://kerrymcavoyphd.fillout.com/fan-mail

Submit your question to be answered on air here!

Resources

The Complete Recovery Collection: Narcissistic abuse resources
First Steps to Leaving: Online self-paced digital course
Toxic-Free Relationship Club: Live coaching & community support

Follow Kerry!

Kerry Kerr McAvoy, Ph.D., an author and educator, helps listeners decode toxic dynamics, recognize manipulation, and rebuild self-trust.

As an Amazon affiliate, commission is earned from qualifying purchases.

Why Narcissists Use Secrets to Avoid Intimacy Oct 13, 2025

Show notes

Ever feel like your relationship was the most intoxicating connection of your life—only to discover shocking lies and betrayal later?

This week, intimacy expert Gary Katz reveals how narcissists protect themselves by keeping secrets, building false connections, and manipulating trust.

Podcast Extra Exclusive Interview

Find the exclusive second segment and weekly newsletter here.

More About the Podcast Extra Interview

🔹 Think your relationship is missing intimacy, but not sure why?

In this members-only bonus, Katz shares practical tools to reignite connection, repair conflict, and restore closeness.

👉 Get immediate access to this extended interview

MORE ABOUT GARY KATZ:

Center for Intimacy Recovery

GARY KATZ, M.S.W., C.S.A.T., C.P.T.T. is a psychotherapist and founder of The Center for Intimacy Recovery in New York.

Submit your question to be answered on air here!

Resources

The Complete Recovery Collection: Narcissistic abuse resources
First Steps to Leaving: Online self-paced digital course
Toxic-Free Relationship Club: Live coaching & community support

Follow Kerry!

Kerry Kerr McAvoy, Ph.D., an author and educator, helps listeners decode toxic dynamics, recognize manipulation, and rebuild self-trust.

As an Amazon affiliate, commission is earned from qualifying purchases.

My Husband Claims His Facebook Account Has Been Hacked!… Oct 09, 2025

Show notes

What do you do when the evidence points to betrayal, but your partner insists you’re crazy?

This week’s Fan Mail comes from a listener in Atlanta, Georgia, who describes the heartbreak of suspecting her husband of nearly 50 years is living a double life. Despite finding suspicious phone activity and even an STD clinic reference, her husband denies everything—blaming and belittling her instead.

In this episode, Dr. Kerry unpacks the signs of DARVO (deny, attack, reverse victim and offender), explains why being called “crazy” is psychological abuse, and shares what to do when you feel destabilized by betrayal trauma. She also offers practical next steps—from documenting evidence to protecting digital privacy—to help regain clarity and safety.

Submit Your Question

If you’d like your question addressed on air, send it here: 👉 https://kerrymcavoyphd.fillout.com/fan-mail

Submit your question to be answered on air here!

Resources

The Complete Recovery Collection: Narcissistic abuse resources
First Steps to Leaving: Online self-paced digital course
Toxic-Free Relationship Club: Live coaching & community support

Follow Kerry!

Kerry Kerr McAvoy, Ph.D., an author and educator, helps listeners decode toxic dynamics, recognize manipulation, and rebuild self-trust.

As an Amazon affiliate, commission is earned from qualifying purchases.

Why It’s So Hard to See Predators Coming: The Story Behind Netflix's Bad Vegan Oct 06, 2025

Show notes

Predators are often hiding in plain sight—and even the smartest, most capable people can miss the red flags. In this episode, Dr. Kerry McAvoy talks with Sarma Melngailis, the former restaurateur whose story was told in Netflix’s Bad Vegan.

Sarma opens up about how she was manipulated, criminalized, and misrepresented—and why her memoir The Girl with the Duck Tattoo finally tells the truth.

Resources Mentioned

• Sarma’s memoir: The Girl with the Duck Tattoo: The Girl with the Duck Tattoo

• Follow Sarma: on Instagram: @sarmamelngailis

• Sarma’s Substack: Sarma Melngailis on Substack

• Dr. Kerry’s book: Love You More: The Harrowing True Story of Lies, Sex Addiction, & Double Cross

Podcast Extra Exclusive Interview

Find it here in the exclusive interview and weekly newsletter: 👉 https://substack.com/@breakingfreenarcabuse

More About the Podcast Extra Interview

What did Bad Vegan get wrong?

In this exclusive interview, Sarma Melngailis reveals the critical details Netflix left out—from spliced audio that twisted her story to entire expert interviews that were cut.

Get immediate access to this extended conversation—and hear the truth behind the most misleading moments of the docuseries.

👉 Join today

Submit your question to be answered on air here!

Resources