Show notes
Intro
Hi Mommas, I'm so glad to talk with you today. Our topic of the day is Halloween. We're dealing with our own hangups and how the Bible fits with this holiday.
I've got some tea here in my beautiful Bible Momming mug that a friend made me on this beautiful fall day. This is my favorite time of year. And, Halloween is just around the corner.
The costumes and plastic decor is in just about every store I visit from the home goods stores to the grocery stores to Walmart and more.
I've been thinking about this episode for a while and wondering what I had to bring to you on it. I was tempted to not talk about out, but so many people take stands on this holiday either for or against it, and I don't know if you've noticed, but it's gaining in popularity. Probably because companies have figured out ways to make good money off it and us, but I've seen that stores have just as much stuff for Halloween as they have for Christmas.
I've spoken with people who don't like Christmas because of the emotional problems their family has at that time. Because of that, they pour their energy into Halloween as an opportunity to just have fun.
So, here I sit, looking at my microphone that is decorated like a stuffed owl. I call it Uhu, because that's German for a barn owl, or so I've been told. And, I'm wondering what I can add to this discussion.
My Hang Ups
Personally, I've gone through many different emotions on this holiday. When I was young, I dressed up and went trick or treating, I've been to many Halloween parties that friends invited me to attend. But it often conflicted with my faith. As a research maniac, I dug into the history of the day and how people have historically done some pretty nasty stuff as a way of "celebrating." I wasn't cool with that, so I went through a stage of life where I completely avoided all things Halloween.
As a youth pastor, I was put in charge of our churches Fall festival, because many churches do that right. We love fall, but we don't want to go down the track of celebrating things like horror monsters and ghosts and ghouls. I was trying to be open while putting boundaries up, so I encouraged people to come in costume but I hyper encouraged the idea of All Saints Day and celebrating believers who had gone before….FYI, they have some gory stories, and it wouldn't be unusual for them to be killed in some gruesome way. Needless to say, that didn't turn out the way I had hoped.
I think many churches and individuals go through the same struggles. How do we enjoy this holiday that has such a dark past? And, how do we help our kids through it when they are just plain freaked out by the level of gore people put on their lawns.
Other Perspectives
1. When it comes to Halloween, some people just find it silly and embrace it like any other fantasy ideas (like Star Wars, Harry Potter, Star Trek, and horror movies). For them, it's just another fantasy fiction kind of thing.
2. Some people enjoy the connection with neighbors that is uniquely available on this day. I asked the Bible Momming Facebook group what their opinions were of Halloween and here are a couple of responses I received.
"I LOVE Halloween. It's the one time (sadly) when the neighbors come out and visit. I have the BEST conversations with them as they come to the door and I love seeing all of my kids' friends visit too."
another said….
"Love it! Great night of community and bringing neighbors together. I also like the decorating, costumes, and candy. I only wish it was always the last Friday in October instead of the 31st."
One mom shared her frustrations saying,
"Having special needs kids, I always dreaded Halloween. It's always been way too overwhelming for them. My introvert would have panic attacks about talking to strangers, and my extrovert would walk into strangers houses!… until we found this wonderful lady in our town who organizes this awesome hay ride truck or treat in her neighborhood! No one ever trick or treats there cause it's all dirt roads and no lights. Her and her neighbors were bummed they couldn't see any kids. So she has a sign-up list of specific houses that wish to participate, and we start at her house with a bbq... everybody brings both a side dish and a large bag of candy to donate. After we eat we load up on flatbed trucks with hay bails and are driven to each house on the list!…BEST way to spend Halloween EVER!!"
3. Some people embrace the dark stuff (luckily, they are in the minority).
4. Some people close the door, turn off the front porch light and do something completely unrelated.
Stuff From The Bible
You may be expecting me to say that I know the exact right way this day should be handled. But, I don't. You see, the Bible isn't strictly about rules and consequences. It does take into account the differences in our backgrounds and the differences in how we view the world.
When we consider how the Bible fits this, I find myself going to Romans. The Apostle Paul wrote a letter to the Roman believers to help them know how to handle some of the stresses around them. And they lived in a seriously stressful world for Bible believers.
In Rome, their holidays were ALL about worshipping some deity (none of them the one true God). They had four significant holidays that included women being beaten or forcibly taken as wives, animal sacrifices,
So, Paul knew the kind of stuff people were doing when he wrote this letter. One big debate among believers in Christ was whether you should eat food that was sacrificed to a god (little g) or drink wine. Now I know that Halloween isn't about that, but it is about how we view other people's way of dealing with stuff that's not in line with scripture.
Romans 14:12-15, and 23
"Yes, each of us will give a personal account to God. So let's stop condemning each other. Decide instead to live in such a way that you will not cause another believer to stumble and fall.
I know and am convinced on the authority of the Lord Jesus that no food, in and of itself, is wrong to eat. But if someone believes it is wrong, then for that person it is wrong. And if another believer is distressed by what you eat, you are not acting in love if you eat it. Don't let your eating ruin someone for whom Christ died. … But if you have doubts about whether or not you should eat something, you are sinning if you go ahead and do it. For you are not following your convictions. If you do anything you believe is not right, you are sinning."
As I've considered these verses, I found myself wondering if I was trying too hard to avoid and not looking at people to connect with them. I started realizing that I needed to meet people where they were and not get caught up in what other people did on this day but just what the people I know are doing.
How My Thoughts Changed
Our pastor encouraged people to use this day to get to know our neighbors better. We decided to have a kind of open house at our church on Halloween so that our church could connect with the neighbors and people who tend to be scared of church buildings could walk around inside and check it out without any expectation of getting preached to. People came in droves. It was unreal. So many people were seeking something safe and fun for their family. It's become the leading party I do for Halloween, and yes we call it Halloween because that's what most people know about.
I would love to hear what you do for Halloween and your reasons for or against something. You can contact me by going to biblemomming.com/connect Feel free to ask me any questions you have about the Bible or Halloween.
Ways to Deal With The Gore
If you have small kids between the ages of 2 and 7 and they are terrified of the gory masks and bloody things in the many stores, my approach was to have them touch it and see that it isn't scary. I let mine crumple some of those soft masks and we even made home made blood with corn syrup and food coloring to help them realize it was pretend.
You can also create your own options like focusing on the "dark" critters. Black cats, bats and spiders are all creations of God and beautiful in His creation, in their own way. This can be a time for you to learn more about them with your children.
It can also be a time to let them know that we all have skeletons that God designed within our bodies and they help us to stand and walk and do all the things we do. Without our skeletons, we are pretty much blobs of goo.
Dealing with Greed
Halloween can also be a time when kids get super greedy about all that candy. They get into mine, mine, all mine mode. This isn't something to encourage. So, we often sought out ways to limit how much candy they ate at one time. I even encouraged them to give some to Dad's work or organizations that collected for soldiers stationed overseas. Out of their plenty, they learned to give to others.
Participate While Not Embracing the Darker Elements of This Day
1. Trick or Treat and seek out ways to connect with your neighbors, to meet them and talk more. Make it fun.
2. Help your kids to choose their costumes wisely.
3. Think care not scare - there's nothing wrong with scaring the kids who come to your door, but do it with a caring attitude. Some kids freak out, and parents will give you the heads up, care first.
4. Help your family to focus their thoughts. As a multiple-car-accident survivor, I know that there are things that are truly scary and then there is Hollywood scary. You have to decide where you will fix your thoughts this Halloween.
5. Remember, other people have their own stories and their own reasons for participating and not participating.
Not sure what to do?
Think about these verses:
Philippians 4:8-9
"And now, dear brothers and sisters, one final thing. Fix your thoughts on what is true, and honorable, and right, and pure, and lovely, and admirable. Think about things that are excellent and worthy of praise. Keep putting into practice all you learned and received from me—everything you heard from me and saw me doing. Then the God of peace will be with you."
As we seek to be wise mommas, it's tough to know what is right or wrong for our kids. Remember we are called guardians for a reason. We guard our kids against the people or things that want to cause them harm. Consider your story and your kids and remember...
Proverbs 4:23
"Guard your heart above all else,
for it determines the course of your life."
If you need some fun ideas for your kids, I created a Pinterest board called Halloween Family Fun. Check it out, I hope it helps you.
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