Being Well with Forrest Hanson and Dr. Rick Hanson - Rick Hanson, Ph.D., Forrest Hanson

Latest Episodes:

How to Reinvent Yourself (in 2023) Dec 26, 2022

Show notes

We’ve come to the end of another year, and it’s a good time to take stock and consider how we’d like to grow and change during our next trip around the sun. In this episode, Forrest and Dr. Rick focus on what supports us and what holds us back from reinventing ourselves and becoming all we wish to be. They talk about how they’d like to change over the next year, different approaches to new year’s resolutions, do a little digging around in Forrest’s psyche, and highlight a few practical things we can do to support our growth.

New Course From Rick! Learn the lessons of a lifetime in the new and improved Foundations of Wellbeing 2.0 program. This yearlong, online program teaches you how to grow the 12 key inner strengths that lead to lasting wellbeing during difficult times. Our New Year’s sale is going on now, and you can use the code BeingWell25 to get an additional 25% off the purchase price.
Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube.

Key Topics:

0:00: Introduction

1:55: Different frameworks around goals and intentions

6:15: Forrest’s goal: more freedom, less constraint

8:50: Integrating the mundane and the profound

11:35: What supports us in changing? What constrains us?

13:35: Mentors, and other sources of encouragement

22:00: Reverting to old patterns when returning to old environments

28:00: Self-acceptance makes change possible

29:45: “Trim tabs” and other forms of psychological leverage

35:30: Diligence, effort, and consistency

37:50: Addressing deficits and reassuring yourself

40:30: Relaxing around inevitability

41:40: Embracing the joy of possibility and change

46:35: Recap

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The Science of Stress with Dr. Elissa Epel Dec 19, 2022

Show notes

We think of stress as “bad” for you, but what if some forms of stress could actually help us grow and change for the better? On today’s episode Forrest and Dr. Rick are joined by Dr. Elissa Epel, a psychologist and leading stress researcher, to explore the science behind the stress response. They talk about the different forms of stress, what separates “good” stress from “bad” stress, how we can take advantage of good stress, and dealing with existential forms of stress like the climate crisis.

About our Guest: Elissa Epel is a psychologist, bestselling author, and a Professor and Vice Chair in the Department of Psychiatry at the University of California, San Francisco. Her research focuses on stress, well-being, and optimal aging. She’s also the best-selling co-author of The Telomere Effect, and her newest book is The Stress Prescription: Seven Days to More Joy and Ease.

New Course From Rick! Learn the lessons of a lifetime in the new and improved Foundations of Wellbeing 2.0 program. This yearlong, online program teaches you how to grow the 12 key inner strengths that lead to lasting wellbeing during difficult times. It’s currently 40% off, and you can use the code BeingWell25 to get an additional 25% off the purchase price.

Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube.

Key Topics:

0:00: Introduction

1:10: Toxic stress vs. hormetic stress

6:30: Challenge orientation vs. threat response

11:35: Simple anchoring practices and their effects

17:00: Autophagy

19:00: Practical consequences of different forms of stress

25:25: Distinguishing physiological from psychological stress

31:00: Comfort with uncertainty and shared existential concerns

40:20: The future of the planet and its inequities

42:40: Recap

Sponsors:

Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!

Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription.

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Responding to Criticism, and Accepting The Way Things Are Dec 12, 2022

Show notes

Criticism is an unavoidable part of life. But even though we’re all going to be criticized from time to time, many of us spend much of our lives living in fear of criticism. Then, on the flip side, we’re all critics ourselves. We’ve all been in situations that aren’t quite what we want them to be – so we need to either do something to change them or accept them as they are.

On this episode Dr. Rick and Forrest focus on how we can get better at receiving and giving criticism, learn to accept what lies outside of our control, and avoid the “mood of complaint.”

New Course From Rick! Learn the lessons of a lifetime in the new and improved Foundations of Wellbeing 2.0 program. This yearlong, online program teaches you how to grow the 12 key inner strengths that lead to lasting wellbeing during difficult times. It’s currently 50% off, and you can use the code BeingWell25 to get an additional 25% off the purchase price.

Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube.

Key Topics:

0:00: Introduction and critiques of the podcast

4:45: Where we place our attention

8:00: Two kinds of complaint

8:55: Self-righteousness and identifying with our complaints

11:25: What do we hope to accomplish by complaining?

13:15: Sharing experience vs. asserting information

18:35: Developing relationships where your vulnerability is welcome

24:45: Projecting your unclear desires on other people

28:10: How to respond to negative feedback and manage your reactions

32:00: Releasing attachment to changing others and responding to trolls

39:00: Complaints come from emotional dissatisfaction

43:45: Recap

Sponsors:

Sponsors:

Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!

Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription.

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Living While Dying with Sensei Koshin Paley Ellison Dec 05, 2022

Show notes

“All the time I work with dying people, and only a few of them know they are dying.”

On this episode of Being Well, Soto Zen teacher Sensei Koshin Paley Ellison joins Forrest and Rick to explore living, dying, and personal practice in the midst of our beautiful, challenging, messy lives.

About our Guest: Sensei Koshin is an author, Zen teacher, Jungian psychotherapist, and co-founder of the New York Zen Center for Contemplative Care. He began his formal Zen training in 1987 and completed six years of training at the Jungian Psychoanalytic Association. His most recent book is Untangled: Walking the Eightfold Path to Clarity, Courage, and Compassion.

Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube.

Key Topics:

0:00: Introduction

1:40: Koshin’s got game

3:20: The privilege of witnessing the dying process

11:25: Difficult emotions that come up when considering death

16:00: Entanglement vs. spaciousness

28:30: Windows of acceptance, and the things we don’t want to accept

33:15: Compassionate presence

37:55: How Jungian training has influenced Koshin’s contemplative practice

42:35: What Koshin is still untangling, and the ground of being

48:30: Appreciating being alive

51:45: Recap

New Course From Rick! Learn the lessons of a lifetime in the new and improved Foundations of Wellbeing 2.0 program. This yearlong, online program teaches you how to grow the 12 key inner strengths that lead to lasting wellbeing during difficult times. It’s currently 50% off, and you can use the code BeingWell25 to get an additional 25% off the purchase price.

Sponsors:

Being Well is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!

Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription.

Connect with the show:

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

How to Understand Anxiety and See Threats Clearly Nov 28, 2022

Show notes

We’re living in an anxious time, and part of the reason we’re anxious is because there are very real challenges we face both individually and collectively. But we’re also affected by the natural tendencies of the brain, which is easily influenced by fear and threat. On this episode of Being Well, Dr. Rick and Forrest Hanson focus on how we can see threats clearly and be the “right amount” of concerned.

Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube.

Key Topics:

0:00: Introduction

1:20: Why is it hard for us to see threats without excessive worry?

3:35: Transcending evolutionary influences toward fear

6:30: The last time Rick took LSD

10:45: Discerning what’s valuable in our anxieties, and leaving the rest

15:45: Forrest’s apartment fire story

17:35: Disagreements in evaluating a threat between people

21:55: Probability of risk

25:00: Practical techniques to assess threats with more clarity

29:30: Existential acceptance

33:30: Help for anxiety about anxiety

37:15: Recap

New Course From Rick! Learn the lessons of a lifetime in the new and improved Foundations of Wellbeing 2.0 program. This yearlong, online program teaches you how to grow the 12 key inner strengths that lead to lasting wellbeing during difficult times. Our New Year's sale is running now, and you can use the code BeingWell25 to get an additional 25% off the purchase price.

Sponsors:

Wondrium helps you learn anything! Right now, Wondrium is offering our listeners 50% OFF their first three months. Sign up today at wondrium.com/beingwell.

Being Well is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!

Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription.

Connect with the show:

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Moving Beyond “Fair” to Build a Great Relationship with Nate and Kaley Klemp Nov 21, 2022

Show notes

These days couples often shoot for 50/50 in their relationships: an even split of responsibilities in the home or at work. But 50/50 often leads to fights over fairness, and this fixation on fairness can be the death of many relationships.

On this episode of Being Well, Forrest and Dr. Rick are joined by Nate and Kaley Klemp to explore how we can build fun, fulfilling, and truly equitable relationships. Topics include Nate and Kaley’s early relationship struggles, different models of relationship, breaking out of old patterns, and how we can manage situations where one partner really is contributing significantly more than the other.

About our Guests: Kaley Klemp is an executive coach and expert on small-group dynamics, and Nate Klemp is a bestselling author and founding partner at Mindful, one of the world's largest mindfulness media and training companies. Together, they’re the co-authors of The 80/80 Marriage: A New Model for a Happier, Stronger Relationship.

Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube.

Key Topics:

0:00: Introduction

1:45: Nate and Kaley’s personal relationship as a basis for their work

5:30: Three different models of relationship

9:30: Two pillars to 80/80 - mindset and structure

12:20: How a 50/50 dynamic caused problems for Nate and Kaley

19:20: The conscious or unconscious division of roles

21:30: Gratitude and generosity

25:40: Parenting, shared success, and being on a team

32:15: Getting your partner’s buy-in, reveal and request

39:50: Underlying beliefs and power imbalances

44:20: Creating structure (and data) to have difficult conversations

49:30: Distinguishing a reluctant partner from an unwilling partner

52:05: Key skills that distinguish successful couples

56:10: Recap

New Course From Rick! Learn the lessons of a lifetime in the new and improved Foundations of Wellbeing 2.0 program. This yearlong, online program teaches you how to grow the 12 key inner strengths that lead to lasting wellbeing during difficult times. Our New Year's sale is running now, and you can use the code BeingWell25 to get an additional 25% off the purchase price.

Sponsors:

Wondrium helps you learn anything! Right now, Wondrium is offering our listeners 50% OFF their first three months. Sign up today at wondrium.com/beingwell.

Being Well is sponsored by BetterHelp. Give online therapy a try at betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!

Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription.

Connect with the show:

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Choosing the Roles We Play in Life Nov 14, 2022

Show notes

If you’re the kind of person who listens to mental health podcasts, you’re more likely than average to get pulled into an impromptu “helping role” with your family and friends. Sometimes we seek out these roles, but they can also be uncomfortable or one-sided. And sometimes we get stuck playing a role for someone else that we never wanted in the first place.

On this episode of Being Well, Forrest and Dr. Rick use this situation as a way in to exploring the various roles we play in life, and the profound impact those often unconscious roles have on us. They talk about relationship models, how we select our roles, how familiar roles can keep us trapped in old patterns, enactments and triangulation, and how we can exit unhealthy systems.

Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube.

Key Topics:

0:00: Introduction

2:50: The hazards of accidentally becoming a friend’s therapist

6:45: Objectivity, professionalism, and not needing to be liked

11:00: The roles we take on and how they shape us

16:45: Why we choose certain roles, and being crippled by our strengths

21:00: Enactments

25:15: Splitting

30:10: When someone else pushes you into a role

35:10: Triangulation

48:10: Deep listening and a lesson from Carl Rogers

51:10: Practical tips for drawing boundaries in your roles with others

59:40: Recap

New Course From Rick! Learn the lessons of a lifetime in the new and improved Foundations of Wellbeing 2.0 program. This yearlong, online program teaches you how to grow the 12 key inner strengths that lead to lasting wellbeing during difficult times. Our New Year's sale is running now, and you can use the code BeingWell25 to get an additional 25% off the purchase price.

Sponsors:

Wondrium helps you learn anything! Right now, Wondrium is offering our listeners 50% OFF their first three months. Sign up today at wondrium.com/beingwell.

Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!

Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription.

Connect with the show:

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Authentically Developing Self-Worth Nov 07, 2022

Show notes

It’s one thing to feel good about what we do, and another to feel truly worthy from the inside out. When we increase our self-worth it allows us to take our needs more seriously, get on our own side, and change our lives for the better.

On this episode of Being Well, Rick and Forrest explore how we can develop a more durable sense of self-worth. They talk about self-worth vs. self-esteem, what causes people to lack self-worth, Rick’s personal story of developing a true sense of worthiness, and why more self-worth probably won’t turn you into a narcissistic a**hole.

Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube.

Key Topics:

0:00: Introduction

1:00: The value of self-worth

2:50: Will improving my self-worth turn me into a narcissist?

5:45: What makes people more likely to struggle with self-worth?

6:50: Distinguishing self-worth from self-esteem

9:30: Rick’s own journey to a better sense of self-worth

14:55: Inner attacker, inner nurturer, and the beleaguered self.

19:15: The process of building up your nurturing parts

27:20: Investigating negative stories we tell ourselves

30:55: Mutual rapport and being loving

33:40: Social aspects of developing self worth, and why therapy works

36:50: Non-social aspects

38:20: Relating to yourself from a less ego-oriented perspective

44:40: Vulnerability and tenderness in our interactions with others

46:05: Recap

New Course From Rick! Learn the lessons of a lifetime in the new and improved Foundations of Wellbeing 2.0 program. This yearlong, online program teaches you how to grow the 12 key inner strengths that lead to lasting wellbeing during difficult times. Our New Year's sale is running now, and you can use the code BeingWell25 to get an additional 25% off the purchase price.

Sponsors:

Wondrium helps you learn anything! Right now, Wondrium is offering our listeners 50% OFF their first three months. Sign up today at wondrium.com/beingwell.

Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!

Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription.

Connect with the show:

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

Saying No to Your Past, Embracing Growth, and Becoming Lighter with Yung Pueblo Oct 31, 2022

Show notes

Diego Perez, widely known by his pen name Yung Pueblo, joins Forrest to explore how we can deepen our personal practice, refine the mind, break old patterns, relax the self, and feel lighter than we were before.

This was one of my absolute favorite conversations I’ve had on the podcast, and being with Diego was a real pleasure. I hope you enjoy it as much as I did.

About our Guest: Diego Perez is a poet, meditator, and New York Times bestselling author widely known through his pen name Yung Pueblo. His writing focuses on how we can grow and change for the better, create healthy relationships, and come to truly know ourselves. His newest book is Lighter: Let Go of the Past, Connect with the Present, and Expand the Future.

Watch the Episode: Prefer watching video? You can watch this episode on YouTube.

Key Topics:

0:00: Introduction

0:55: Why the name Yung Pueblo?

2:35: What holds most people back from growth

4:35: Habits Diego struggled with and the logical basis of coping mechanisms

9:15: Moments of insight in learning Vipassana Meditation

11:40: Finding stability in the gradual separation from the ‘self’

20:30: Stories others have told us about ourselves

26:50: What has helped Diego find a flexible sense of identity?

28:55: Relationships as a process not a person

31:20: Diego’s personal meditation and creative practice

34:15: The benefits of a pen name and healthy detachment from your work

40:00: Benefits and pitfalls of social media

42:50: Forrest’s meditation practice, and the positive aspects of difficult emotions

48:25: What Diego would tell his younger self.

50:30: Recap

New Course From Rick! Learn the lessons of a lifetime in the new and improved Foundations of Wellbeing 2.0 program. This yearlong, online program teaches you how to grow the 12 key inner strengths that lead to lasting wellbeing during difficult times. Our New Year's sale is running now, and you can use the code BeingWell25 to get an additional 25% off the purchase price.

Sponsors:

Wondrium helps you learn anything! Right now, Wondrium is offering our listeners 50% OFF their first three months. Sign up today at wondrium.com/beingwell.

Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!

Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription.

Connect with the show:

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

How to Forgive Yourself Oct 24, 2022

Show notes

We all make mistakes in life. When we do it's important to take appropriate responsibility, feel the "wince," and make amends as we can. But after we've done that...then what? Many people find it easier to forgive others than they do to truly forgive themselves, and it's not uncommon to be burdened by excessive shame and guilt that has outlived its expiration date.

On this episode Dr. Rick and Forrest explore forgiveness, including how we can forgive ourselves. This includes common myths and misunderstandings about forgiveness, the difference between healthy and unhealthy forms of shame and remorse, coming to terms with what we've done, and a roadmap to achieving (self-)forgiveness.

Key Topics:

0:00: Introduction

2:05: Assumptions, approval, and what forgiveness is and is not

7:45: What does healthy remorse look like?

10:00: Forrest exploring a dream about appropriate remorse

13:00: Our internalized justice system

17:00: More on dreams and internal parts

24:25: Aspects of unhealthy remorse

27:30: How to move through a recurring cycle of shame and unhealthy remorse

32:30: Proportionality, defensiveness, intention, and owning your mistakes

41:00: Clean pain and dirty pain

46:55: Some concrete practices

51:40: Recap

Support the Podcast: We're on Patreon! For just the cost of a cup of coffee a month you can support the show, and receive a variety of bonuses in return.

Sponsors:

Listen to Season 2 of Turning Points from Boston Globe Media wherever you get your podcasts!

Access over 30 at-home lab tests from Everlywell, and head to everlywell.com/beingwell for twenty percent off your next test.

Join over a million people using BetterHelp, the world’s largest online counseling platform. Visit betterhelp.com/beingwell for 10% off your first month!

Want to sleep better? Try the Calm app! Visit calm.com/beingwell for 40% off a premium subscription.

Connect with the show:

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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