Awesome Marriage Podcast

Don't Bench Yourself with Kent Evans Sep 19, 2025

Today we’re diving into Kent’s brand-new book, Don’t Bench Yourself. In it, Kent challenges readers to take an honest look at their lives, at the opportunities they might be missing, the risks they’re avoiding, and the goals left sitting on the table. His message is clear: it’s time to get off the bench and stay in the game. Whether it’s in your career, your marriage, or your parenting journey, you can’t afford to sit on the sidelines. This book will inspire you to move past fear, let go of shame, and trust God’s perfect timing as you keep pressing forward.

Episode Highlights:

What is slow quitting?

Fear paralyzes us from stepping into deeper connections.

Shame kicks in when we try and fail and then we believe the lie that it’ll never get better than this.

Criticism can inhibit someone’s desire to continue pressing forward.

Motivation can decrease when we don’t see quick results.

Quotes from Today’s Episode:

For some of us, what we need to see with our eyes of faith, is a life lived and ended in faith. - Kent Evans

You pull yourself out of the game because you think you no longer qualify to play. - Kent Evans

We get impatient with God so we quit. We draw ourselves out of the game. -Kent Evans

Fear is causing you to be stuck. - Dr. Kim

One of the fastest ways out of a problem is clearly labeling the problem. - Kent Evans

It’s so much easier to point the finger, but yet it doesn’t resolve anything. -Dr. Kim

We have a tendency as guys, when things aren't going well, we have a tendency to withdraw. -Dr. Kim

A big temptation for me is to spend time and energy where there is a really clear report card, a really clear measurable level of success. - Kent Evans

We so desperately want to measure growth and success. However, some of the best things in life can’t be measured. - Kent Evans

We have a tendency to go where we are being affirmed and people think we’re great. - Dr. Kim

A Wider Lens: Questions for Self Reflection

In 12 months how do you want your relationship with your husband or wife to be better?

In 12 months how do you want your relationship with your children to be better?

Name one part of your life where failure kept you from trying again.

Now that you’ve named it- go try again!

Mentioned in this Episode:

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One-Sided Love: How to Fight for Your Marriage When Your Spouse Won’t Ep. 695 Sep 16, 2025

Nancy and I are back together to discuss a topic that frequently shows up in our inbox: one-sided marriages. These are spouses who reach out because, even in the midst of disconnect and hurt, they still desire a healthy, God-honoring marriage, but feel like they’re the only one who cares or the only one willing to put in the work. How do you reconcile and reconnect? That’s the focus of our conversation today. I’m praying this episode encourages those who feel alone and offers hope and next steps for fighting for your marriage.

Episode Highlights:

Love like Christ without enabling.

Communicate with curiosity, not accusation.

Persevere in prayer and faithful action.

Seek God’s glory above all else

Quotes from Today’s Episode:

Fighting for your marriage as a Christian means pursuing Christ-like love even when it's not reciprocated

This isn't about becoming a doormat or enabling destructive behavior, but rather embodying the gospel in your relationship.

Approach with curiosity rather than accusation: "I've noticed you seem really tired lately. How can I support you?"

Continue showing love through actions without demanding emotional reciprocation.

Don't take the bait to defend yourself constantly or prove your spouse wrong—this keeps you stuck in an unhealthy cycle.

But remember, you can't force insight or repentance—that's between them and God.

Humility doesn't mean accepting mistreatment or pretending everything is fine.

Your humble confidence in who God created you to be can actually challenge your spouse to rise up rather than settle.

Standing in the gap means interceding in prayer, maintaining hope when your spouse has lost it, and continuing to live out your marriage vows even when they're not.

The goal is always God's glory and following His heart, which deeply desires reconciliation.

Couples’ Conversation Guide:

How connected do you feel to your spouse on a scale of 1-10?

Do you feel like you are trying to shoulder the burden of your marriage alone?

Are there unhealthy patterns in your marriage that need to be addressed?

Are there areas of your marriage that you’ve settled for mediocrity or disconnect?

Mentioned in this Episode:

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