Ask Christopher West

Latest Episodes:

I Choose You | ACW14 Apr 08, 2019

Show notes

What can TOB teach us about work? My wife wants to contracept, but I don’t. How would you recommend I handle this situation? Do you have any specific songs that speak to your love one another? Christopher and Wendy dive into their own stories to cast light on these questions. Also, does anybody see a duck?

Ask Christopher West is a weekly podcast in which Theology of the Body Institute Director Christopher West and his beloved wife Wendy share their humor and wisdom, answering questions about marriage, relationships, life, and the Catholic faith, all in light of John Paul II’s beautiful teachings on the Theology of the Body.

This week’s questions:

Q1: I was wondering if TOB can teach us something about work. Work, like sex, is an area of life where human beings often use one another. And yet many have experienced huge blessings by giving of themselves in a labor of love. How can TOB help someone stuck in a dead-end job? What can TOB teach us about work?

Q2: My wife wants to contracept, but I do not. I feel an increasing trust in God’s providence in regards to our sexuality, but my wife has threatened to leave our marriage over this issue. Do you have any thoughts?

Q3: Do you have any specific songs that speak to your love of one another?

Submit your question at AskChristopherWest.com.

Resources mentioned this week:

Vademecum for Confessors Concerning Some Aspects of the Morality of Conjugal Life

I Choose You - Sara Bareilles

Army of Angels - The Script

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Produced by Sounder and Key.

The Lord is Calling | ACW13 Apr 01, 2019

Show notes

As a couple in the perimenopausal stage of life, how should we handle issues surrounding NFP, irregular cycles, and prolonged periods of abstinence? As a husband, I feel that my wife is often only ever interested in sexual union from the physical side. How do I deal with this? How do I create space in my prayer time for me to hear the Lord speaking?

This week’s questions:

Q1: My husband and I are entering into the perimenopausal stage of life. My cycles are very irregular, making practicing NFP difficult, and we have strong reason to avoid a pregnancy at this time. We are concerned about how practicing total abstinence will affect our marriage. Do you have any advice for this situation?

Q2: My wife seems to have less interest in sex than me, generally, and when she is interested, she seems more interested in just the physical act than the spiritual/emotional dimension. I am worried this is harming my marriage. What should I do?

Q3: In prayer, I find myself doing a lot of talking. How should I so listen so that I can hear God speaking?

Submit your question at AskChristopherWest.com.

Resources mentioned this week:

Catechism of the Catholic Church - 2342

Marriage Counseling Resources:
Pastoral Solutions Institute
CatholicPsych Institute
Dr. Peter Damgaard-Hansen

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If you enjoy the podcast, help us out by writing a review. Thanks for listening!

Produced by Sounder and Key.

The Cross is Real | ACW12 Mar 25, 2019

Show notes

How do I live my single-ness while in the process of an annulment? If you had only 30 minutes to talk to an RCIA class on Theology of the Body, what would you say? My husband is suffering from a pornography addiction; what should I do? Christopher and Wendy dive into these questions (and Christopher raps) on today's episode.

This week’s questions:

Q1: I am a married woman going through the annulment process. I have been successful in remaining chaste, despite sometimes desiring otherwise. Do you have any advice for how best to live this time in my life?

Q2: If you had only 30 minutes to speak to an RCIA class on the Theology of the Body, what would you say?

Q3: My husband is suffering from heavy depression and a pornography addiction. What should I do to be a faithful wife in this difficult time?

Submit your question at AskChristopherWest.com.

Resources mentioned this week:

Made for More Parish Event

The Good News About Sex and Marriage

Find Christopher West on Facebook and Instagram.
Discover the Theology of the Body Institute.

If you enjoy the podcast, help us out by writing a review. Thanks for listening!

Produced by Sounder and Key.

Wendy and the "Good Bread" | ACW11 Mar 18, 2019

Show notes

As a newlywed, how can my spouse and I live out the TOB message in our parish community? What do we do when our first year of marriage doesn't feel like a "honeymoon year"? Where should unmarried couples draw the line at physical intimacy? Christopher and Wendy share some stories from their own marriage

This week’s questions:

Q1: As a newlywed, what are your thoughts on how my husband and I can best live out the TOB message in our parish community, beyond living it out in our own lives?

Q2: Even though we were well-prepared and devout Catholics, the first year of our marriage has been difficult. The fact that it should be a “honeymoon year” is very discouraging. It seems like we are having a harder time than most other couples we know. What is your advice?

Q3: In ACW3, you talked about how married couples can be intimate but abstain from sexual acts during periods of fertility. How should unmarried couples go about deciding where to draw the line with sexual intimacy?

Submit your question at AskChristopherWest.com.

Resources mentioned this week:

The Good News about Sex and Marriage (Christopher referenced Chapter 4 in this podcast)

Made for More Parish Event

The Couple to Couple League's Live the Love Blog

Find Christopher West on Facebook and Instagram.
Discover the Theology of the Body Institute.

If you enjoy the podcast, help us out by writing a review. Thanks for listening!

Produced by Sounder and Key.

In Which Christopher Quacks | ACW10 Mar 11, 2019

Show notes

As a single person in my thirties, how do I cope with the desire to be married? As a happily married man, how do I ensure that my sexual desire for my wife is expressed in love and not lust? How can couples develop a deeper practice of marital prayer? Christopher and Wendy draw from their own experiences of marriage in this episode of Ask Christopher West. Also, Christopher quacks. Really.

This week’s questions:

Q1: What do you do if you are single and you've been single for years? I’m in my thirties and I want to get married, but God has not put that person in your life yet. How do I reconcile this ache and longing for communion?

Q2: As a happily married man, I often struggle with my own sexual desire for my wife and distinguishing whether this desire (and how I express it) is right or wrong. We're firmly planted in the Church's teachings concerning sexual ethics but even within those boundaries my experience has been one of guilt over whether I am truly being loving or lustful toward my wife. Any words of wisdom would be greatly appreciated!

Q3: Do you pray together as a couple? What does that look like for you? As a spiritual director (and celibate woman, consecrated with vows), I encourage spouses to have and develop marital prayer. Often times I get surprised with the response: “that’s awkward”! I am aware that one’s spiritual life is quite intimate, but I imagine it could deepen other levels of intimacy in marriage, including physical intimacy. Would you mind sharing this intimate topic with us, your beloved audience ;)

Submit your question at AskChristopherWest.com.

Resources mentioned this week:

For more by Christopher West on Marriage, check out The Good News about Sex and Marriage.

Find Christopher West on Facebook and Instagram.
Discover the Theology of the Body Institute.

If you enjoy the podcast, help us out by writing a review. Thanks for listening!

Produced by Sounder and Key.

The Socks on the Floor | ACW9 Mar 04, 2019

Show notes

A lot of people support the Sexual Revolution (and everything that comes with it) out of genuine compassion for their fellow man. How do we best address or dialogue with people in this position? What are some ways that married couples manage conflict within marriage? Christopher and Wendy share from their own experience to answer these questions.

This week’s questions:

Q1: I think a great many people who support the Sexual Revolution (contraception, abortion, etc) do so out of a genuine compassion for others. Often, as Christians, we have a tendency to view such people as "the enemy". What's the most effective way to engage with them that respects (or at least assumes) their genuine compassion?

Q2: Can you share some ways in which married couples can manage conflict within their marriages?

Submit your question at AskChristopherWest.com.

Resources mentioned this week:

Catechism 678

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Discover the Theology of the Body Institute.

If you enjoy the podcast, help us out by writing a review. Thanks for listening!

Produced by Sounder and Key.

Our Kids Have Two Parents, and You're One of Them | ACW8 Feb 25, 2019

Show notes

Do I have to be a "slave" to God? As a minister, how do I figure out the balance between work and life balance? What role does male/female complementarity play in parenting? Christopher and Wendy answer these questions in this week's episode of Ask Christopher West!

This week’s questions:

Q1: Why do the saints and mystics put such an emphasis on being a “slave” to Jesus, while we know that God is not a slavedriver?

Q2: As a minister, how do I balance the demands of ministry and family?

Q3: How should the complementarity of man and woman fulfill God’s plan in the context of parenting?

Submit your question at AskChristopherWest.com.

Resources mentioned this week:

Pope Francis Apostolic Exhortation: Gaudete et Exsultate
Parenting with Grace by Greg and Lisa Popcak

Find Christopher West on Facebook and Instagram.
Discover the Theology of the Body Institute.

If you enjoy the podcast, help us out by writing a review. Thanks for listening!

Produced by Sounder and Key.

Getting Un-Stuck | ACW7 Feb 18, 2019

Show notes

Why all the emphasis on dressing modestly? Why are we focusing on that and not on seeing others as people, not objects? As a youth minister, how do I help my teens see the beauty of Theology of the Body? Why does the Church seem to be overly concerned with virgins and virginity? Christopher and Wendy dive into these questions, as well as Christopher's hair regimen, in this episode.

This week’s questions:

Q1: If our ultimate goal is to be able to look at one another without any sense of sin or lust, why is there such an emphasis on dressing modestly? Shouldn't we be focused on developing the ability to see one another as people rather than objects? - Anonymous

Q2: I'm a youth minister. How do i convince youth that are mentally stuck in the sin of impurity to understand and live out the church's teaching on sexuality? And by stuck I mean totally unmoved after three weeks of talks/discussions with a respected and effective clergy member. - Ryan

Q3: When we talk about Catholic saints, it’s common to hear them described as virgins. But, I’ve noticed that we only ever describe Female saints as virgins! To a modern woman like myself, frankly, that comes off as creepy and sexist. If we value virginity, why do we only brag on female virgins and not male ones? - Veronica

Submit your question at AskChristopherWest.com.

Resources mentioned this week:

Ephesians Chapters 5 and 6

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If you enjoy the podcast, help us out by writing a review. Thanks for listening!

Production by Sounder and Key.

The Fridge is Dead, but My Soul is Alive | ACW6 Feb 11, 2019

Show notes

Cake or pie? Seriously, that's a question this episode. Also, do you have any advice for my husband and I as we give a talk about NFP to a group of engaged couples? How do we begin to teach some TOB principles to our young children? Christopher and Wendy share some personal stories as they answer these questions.

This week’s questions:

Q1: My husband and I have been asked to give a talk on NFP to a group of couples preparing for marriage. What wisdom can you share from TOB that might add some fuel to our fire?

Q2: How do we begin to teach some of these principles to young children? What are some techniques you’ve used with your own children?

Q3: Cake or Pie. Which is the superior dessert?

Submit your question at AskChristopherWest.com.

Resources mentioned this week:

The Good News about Sex and Marriage Especially Chapter 6!
The Truth and Meaning of Human Sexuality
Beyond the Birds and the Bees by Greg and Lisa Popcak
Beyond the Talk: Christopher West

Find Christopher West on Facebook and Instagram.
Discover the Theology of the Body Institute.

If you enjoy the podcast, help us out by writing a review. Thanks for listening!

Produced by Sounder and Key.

The Best a Man Can Get? | ACW5 Feb 04, 2019

Show notes

A few weeks ago, Gillette released an ad commenting on masculinity and its place within society. Christopher and Wendy answer questions people have submitted on this particular topic.

This week’s questions:

What does it mean for a person to be masculine? Is there such a thing as "toxic masculinity"? Conversely, is there such a thing as "toxic femininity"? Are men inherently more sinful than women?

Submit your question at AskChristopherWest.com.

Resources mentioned this week:

Gillette Ad: We Believe: The Best A Man Can Be
Christopher and Matt Fradd's Facebook Live Conversation on the Ad

Information on the TOB Institute Head and Heart Immersion Course happening March 17-22!
More on other TOB Institute courses here.

Find Christopher West on Facebook and Instagram.
Discover the Theology of the Body Institute.

If you enjoy the podcast, help us out by writing a review. Thanks for listening!

Produced by Sounder and Key.