Ask Christopher West

Latest Episodes:

Christopher, Wendy, and the Moon | ACW34 Aug 26, 2019

Show notes

What are your thoughts on dress and modesty? Is there a theology to the menstrual cycle? Is it OK if our honeymoon sex was kind of awkward? This episode of Ask Christopher West features questions from women on issues largely pertaining to womens' experience, but Christopher and Wendy's reflections are beneficial to both men and women.

Ask Christopher West is a weekly podcast in which Theology of the Body Institute Director Christopher West and his beloved wife Wendy share their humor and wisdom, answering questions about marriage, relationships, life, and the Catholic faith, all in light of John Paul II’s beautiful teachings on the Theology of the Body.

This week’s questions:

Q1: In your talk “Woman: God’s Masterpiece”, you mention that if we as women knew how men think, we would dress modestly without a doubt. Could you explain how men think?

Q2: Is there a theology to the cycle of women? Sometimes, it’s hard for me to accept how I am made as a woman, having all these crazy things happen in my body. And I would like to know if there is something pointing me to God in all that craziness.

Q3: Is it OK if honeymoon sex is very awkward?Aren’t we doing it wrong if it doesn’t feel like a scene from a movie?

Submit your question at AskChristopherWest.com.

Resources mentioned this week:

Bernini's Ecstasy of Saint Teresa
Netflix Documentary Period. End of Sentence.

TOB Level 1 Course - Find the course trailer and testimonials here

Find Christopher West on Facebook and Instagram.
Discover the Theology of the Body Institute.

If you enjoy the podcast, help us out by writing a review. Thanks for listening!

Christopher and Wendy hope their advice is helpful to you, but they are not licensed counseling professionals. If you are dealing with serious issues, please consult our list of trusted professionals.

Featuring music by Mike Mangione.

Produced by Sounder and Key.

The Ground is Level at the Foot of the Cross | ACW33 Aug 19, 2019

Show notes

What advice do you have to those expecting their first child? What should I be thinking about when choosing my child's name? Is forgiveness as depicted in the movie "The Shack?" really possible?

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This week’s questions:

Q1: After two long years of infertility and having one miscarriage, we finally conceived our second child. What lights or wisdom can you share with a first-time mom about motherhood and praying through pregnancy? Also, do you have any thoughts about the importance of choosing a child’s name?

Q2: I know that Christopher loves movies. What does he think about the healing path shown in the movie “The Shack”? Is it really possible to forgive someone that kidnaps, rapes, and kills your daughter?

Submit your question at AskChristopherWest.com.

Resources mentioned this week:

John Paul II's Apostolic Letter on the Dignity and Vocation of Women

Catechism of the Catholic Church | 2838-2845 | "Forgive us our trespasses..."

The Good News about Sex and Marriage

Find Christopher West on Facebook and Instagram.
Discover the Theology of the Body Institute.

If you enjoy the podcast, help us out by writing a review. Thanks for listening!

Featuring music by Mike Mangione.

Produced by Sounder and Key.

Wendy Goes Backpacking | ACW32 Aug 12, 2019

Show notes

If no one is given or received in marriage in heaven, what will be the primary purpose of our bodies? My husband and I were married outside the church, and are seeking an annulment for his previous marriage. We are currently living as brother and sister. Do you have any advice for how best to handle this situation? What's the difference between letting unruly desires die and repression of desire?

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This week’s questions:

Q1: At the resurrection we will be reunited with our bodies, but no one will be given or received in marriage. What, then, will be the primary purpose of our bodies? How will we use our bodies to give and receive love?

Q2: My husband and I have been married for 5 years, together about 11. He was previously married, and has two children. I have one daughter, who I had out of wedlock. I was baptized Catholic, but didn't embrace the faith until last year when I had a conversion experience. My husband and I were not married in the Church, and he has no religion. Through this conversion experience (it was through the Cursillo movement), I understood more deeply that I was living out of the state of grace. We began the process of having his previous marriage dissolved, and I've been under the advisement of a priest. He made it clear to me that I do have a choice that allows me to follow God's will - live as brother and sister. After much prayer, I decided I wanted to do that. However, it seemed wrong to make that decision without my husband, and when I brought it to him about two months ago, we was not open to it. Mostly, it seemed, because it angered him that: 1) I agreed with the Church's stance that our marriage was invalid, and 2) That the Church was "withholding" the sacraments from me which was causing me to be upset. Now, though, after more discerning, I've decided to move forward with living as brother and sister, even if my husband is angry about it. Do you have any advice for me on moving forward with this decision? Any words of wisdom on how to address this with my husband? Could you recommend any Bible passages to guide me? And is it really necessary to sleep in separate beds?

Q3: What's the difference between letting unruly desires die and repression of desire?

Submit your question at AskChristopherWest.com.

Resources mentioned this week:

The Good News About Sex and Marriage

Find Christopher West on Facebook and Instagram.
Discover the Theology of the Body Institute.

If you enjoy the podcast, help us out by writing a review. Thanks for listening!

Featuring music by Mike Mangione.

Produced by Sounder and Key.

The Wounds of Christ | ACW31 Aug 05, 2019

Show notes

I feel that my eating disorder has ruined my body. How is God's glory revealed through MY body, which is so often shameful to me? My brother-in-law has dwarfism, and retains some anger toward God for this. How do I help him? As a new Christian therapist, what are some ways I can include TOB in my practice?

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This week’s questions:

Q1: I had an eating disorder growing up, and now I weigh about 330lbs, down from nearly 400, and still losing - slowly through a healthy lifestyle. As far as the world is concerned my feminine body is fat and unhealthy and disgusting, a laughingstock. I feel like I ruined the body I was given and no matter how many years I work at it, it's "too late now." When you say, "you don't have a body, you are a body" it sounds horrible, not like a gift. What can I do to see it differently?

Q2: I am a new therapist and I was wondering how a therapist can integrate TOB in a counseling setting?

Q3: How does Theology of the Body deal with permanent physical conditions? I have a brother-in-law who has dwarfisim and struggles to understand God and His plan with his condition.

Submit your question at AskChristopherWest.com.

Resources mentioned this week:

Embrace - Film on Body Issues

TOB Institute Courses

Find Christopher West on Facebook and Instagram.
Discover the Theology of the Body Institute.

If you enjoy the podcast, help us out by writing a review. Thanks for listening!

Featuring music by Mike Mangione.

Produced by Sounder and Key.

Love is Worth It | ACW30 Jul 29, 2019

Show notes

What was your dating story? As a divorced person, should I seek an anullment? I have some friends who are seriously discussing polyamory, and whether monogamy is even worth it. What do you think?

This week’s questions:

Q1: Tell us your dating story!

Q2: I was married for 15 years and have been divorced for 7 years. I haven’t tried to get an annulment. It was an unhappy marriage. My husband was verbally abusive and unfaithful. I wasn’t perfect either. I wasn’t a good wife. I made mistakes and I feel I was selfish when I chose to get divorced, because I wanted happiness. But my life has been anything but happy and our two children were impacted negatively by our divorce. I don’t feel, in my heart, that I deserve an annulment because I was 30 when I got married and knew what I was doing. Should I try and get the annulment, or should I pray that I can be reunited with my ex-husband or should I resign myself to live a single chaste life?

Q3: I once met this girl whose boyfriend cheated on her, and she really was hurt. She told me that in the past when she had a boyfriend, and other men were interested in her, she would cheat, so she would be the one who would be hurting them. Then she began talking about polyamory. A guy she was with began saying that polyamory was the best way to go. Threesome, foursome, it was all fun. I was kind of disgusted by the whole conversation. I was trying to tell them (as a Catholic that I am), that that was wrong, but since I didn't know how to explain that that type of mentality and attitude towards relationship and sex is not fun and is wrong, they began laughing at me. So they asked me this question: "IS MONOGAMY WORTH IT?”.

Submit your question at AskChristopherWest.com.

Resources mentioned this week:

Become a patron of the Theology of the Body Institute.

Find Christopher West on Facebook and Instagram.
Discover the Theology of the Body Institute.

If you enjoy the podcast, help us out by writing a review. Thanks for listening!

Featuring music by Mike Mangione.

Produced by Sounder and Key.

Let the Flowers Grow | ACW29 Jul 22, 2019

Show notes

Why does the Church teach against pre-marital sex? Were Adam & Eve unmarried? How do all the difficult parts of marriage fit into the idea that "God wants to marry us"? What advice do you have for an older couple that had a vasectomy done in the early part of their marriage?

This week’s questions:

Q1: Please explain more on God's plan & call for us to wait until marriage for sexual union. Living together is everywhere. How do we understand that Adam & Eve were married? How does their union differ from people living together in commitment and then (maybe) coming to the Church for a blessing?

Q2: Please explain more on how the sexual union images God? And if marriage is the key to understanding everything, what about marriage and sexual union that is an horrendous thing, ugly & hurtful? What about rape, sexual abuse, domestic violence, broken relationships etc etc? All the hard stuff? How does this fit with 'God wants to marry us'? Some people may well think - well if this is what marriage is like I want nothing to do with God marrying me!

Q3: After 40 years of marriage and 3 children, I have finally read TOB for Beginners. My spouse had a vasectomy when we were both 25. We were ignorant of TOB and Humanae Vitae. We were dreadfully poor and erroneously thought vasectomy was the only way to provide for our 3 children. We feel incredible remorse even though we have confessed our sin in the sacrament of Reconciliation and been forgiven. How do we now live TOB at the age of 59? (We were 19 when we got married.) We still enjoy the nuptial embrace as a means of giving ourselves to each other.

Submit your question at AskChristopherWest.com.

Resources mentioned this week:

Sterilization Reversal Book from One More Soul

TOB Institute Community

The Good News about Sex and Marriage

Theology of the Body for Beginners

Find Christopher West on Facebook and Instagram.
Discover the Theology of the Body Institute.

If you enjoy the podcast, help us out by writing a review. Thanks for listening!

Featuring music by Mike Mangione.

Produced by Sounder and Key.

It Is Very Good | ACW28 Jul 15, 2019

Show notes

Why is the priestly vocation for men only? As a man, how do I determine whether I am looking at a woman's body in a way that is loving, not lustful?

This week’s questions:

Q1: From the lens of TOB, can you explain why the priesthood is a vocation for men only?

Q2: As a man, how do I know if the reason/way I look at a beautiful woman is chaste or lustful? Is it wrong to look at “those parts” of the woman's body with a chaste and pure intention even though my body reacts the same or similar way?

Submit your question at AskChristopherWest.com.

Resources mentioned this week:

TOB Pilgrimage to Mexico City

Find Christopher West on Facebook and Instagram.
Discover the Theology of the Body Institute.

If you enjoy the podcast, help us out by writing a review. Thanks for listening!

Featuring music by Mike Mangione.

Produced by Sounder and Key.

Christopher Needs a Pickle Counselor | ACW27 Jul 08, 2019

Show notes

Some celibate religious feel a sense of loss or regret towards marriage and family life. What advice would you give to priests and religious who are struggling in this way? As a woman who is deeply uncomfortable with sexuality and intimacy, how can I engage with these things in a healthy way? Christopher and Wendy only take on two questions this week, but their conversation is one you won't want to miss!

This week’s questions:

Q1: Some celibate religious feel a sense of loss or regret towards marriage and family life. What advice would you give to priests and religious who are struggling in this way?

Q2: As a woman who is deeply uncomfortable with sexuality and intimacy, how can I engage with these things in a healthy way?

Submit your question (or pickle counselor application) at AskChristopherWest.com.

Want to be a part of spreading Theology of the Body all over the world? Become a patron of the Theology of the Body Institute!

Resources mentioned this week:

Theology of the Body Institute Courses - TOB1

Theology of the Body for Beginners

Find Christopher West on Facebook and Instagram.
Discover the Theology of the Body Institute.

If you enjoy the podcast, help us out by writing a review. Thanks for listening!

Featuring music by Mike Mangione.

Produced by Sounder and Key.

The Misadventure of Christopher | ACW26 Jul 01, 2019

Show notes

How do I get started learning about TOB? How do I abstain from participating in Pride Month activities, while still showing compassion for all people? Does TOB give guidance on taking care of the body? Would you and Wendy every consider writing a book together?

Thanks for enjoying the podcast! If you want to support our work, consider becoming a patron of the TOB Institute.

This week’s questions:

Q1: I am drawn to the Theology of the Body. I just watched your 15 minute interview about this and your ending comments were something like: "this will change your life, this will rock your world". I think this is something I am ready to dive into. Can you direct me on how to start?

Q2: My employer is pushing hard for employees to participate in Pride Month, but this violates my conscience. How can I show compassion for all people, without participating in activities like this?

Q3: Does Theology of the Body also give guidance on taking care of the body, such as exercise and food?

Q4: Would you and Wendy ever consider writing a book together?

Submit your question at AskChristopherWest.com.

Resources mentioned this week:

TOB1 - Head and Heart Immersion Course - September 8-13

Dumb Ox Ministries
Ascension Press for Teens
Theology of the Body Evangelization Teams
Damon Owens' JoyTOB

Find Christopher West on Facebook and Instagram.
Discover the Theology of the Body Institute.

If you enjoy the podcast, help us out by writing a review. Thanks for listening!

Featuring music by Mike Mangione.

Produced by Sounder and Key.

The Misadventure of Wendy | ACW25 Jun 24, 2019

Show notes

What's the deal with mortification? Did Adam and Eve really exist? How do I go about understanding my vocation as a celibate woman? As a Protestant woman, how to I share TOB with my friends? As a single man, how can I cultivate true friendships with women?

This week’s questions:

Q1: Some saints have been known for their mortification of their bodies, and I have always found that to be a little confusing. If our bodies are good, why would they do that? And why does the Church present this as saintly?

Q2 Did Adam and Eve really exist? Or are they just a tale and a way to explain original sin?

Q3: Can we talk celibacy for the kingdom? I already discerned (and entered and exited) religious life and I’m unable to be a consecrated virgin (but praise God for His mercy!). I don’t think I’m called to marriage yet have a hard time accepting this consecrated life in the world. How am I really “chosen” versus “looked over”? How can I integrate my sexuality without counting the cost, in other words accepting the ache? How can I better make a sincere gift of self, seeing it as a call rather than condemnation? Thank you and bless you!

Q4: I’m a Protestant Christian who has fallen in love with Theology of the Body and experienced its redemptive power in my own identity as a woman, wife, and mother. I eagerly want to share this revelation with my Protestant friends, especially the married women I know who accept birth control as a “necessary part of marriage” and even disdain children. But given the historical divide in our church, whenever I’ve tried, the “Catholic” concepts are so foreign it's hard to make headway.

Q5: As a single man, how do I navigate friendships with the virtuous women in my life that I am not pursuing, but have a desire to love and grow in friendship with, while protecting their hearts from confusion and/or rejection?

Submit your question at AskChristopherWest.com.

Resources mentioned this week:

Bishop Barron on How to Read the Bible

Our Bodies Proclaim the Gospel CD Set

Become a patron of the TOB Institute

Find Christopher West on Facebook and Instagram.
Discover the Theology of the Body Institute.

If you enjoy the podcast, help us out by writing a review. Thanks for listening!

Featuring music by Mike Mangione.

Produced by Sounder and Key.