Married With Benefits™

Secret 13: Appreciating Your Better Half Sep 05, 2024

Who do highly happy couples attribute their happiness to? Themselves or their partners? Join hosts Brian Goins and Shaunti Feldhahn and learn the power of humility and expressing gratitude for your better half.

Show Notes and Resources

Weekend to Remember is FamilyLife's getaway for couples, at the intersection of faith-based marriage conference and romantic retreat from everyday life. Want to foster more oneness in your marriage? Learn more and find one near you at weekendtoremember.com.
FamilyLife has a brand-new course to help you strengthen your marriage and move towards more joy. Learn more about the the all-new Art of Marriage at artofmarriage.com and get 20% off with the code "Benefits".
For your own copy of Shaunti Feldhahn's book, The Surprising Secrets of Highly Happy Marriages, head to her website.
Check out Married with Benefits on YouTube

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Secret 12: On "Conflict Amnesia" in Marriage Aug 29, 2024

True or False? One of the best ways to resolve conflict in marriage is to let go of it. Join hosts Brian Goins and Shaunti Feldhahn as they discuss the art of "conflict amnesia."

Show Notes and Resources

Weekend to Remember is FamilyLife's getaway for couples, at the intersection of faith-based marriage conference and romantic retreat from everyday life. Want to foster more oneness in your marriage? Learn more and find one near you at weekendtoremember.com.
FamilyLife has a brand-new course to help you strengthen your marriage and move towards more joy. Learn more about the the all-new Art of Marriage at artofmarriage.com and get 20% off with the code "Benefits".
For your own copy of Shaunti Feldhahn's book, The Surprising Secrets of Highly Happy Marriages, head to her website.
Check out Married with Benefits on YouTube

See cru.org/us/en/about/privacy FamilyLife’s Privacy Policy

Secret 11: Debunking Myths Around Divorce and Christians Aug 22, 2024

Divorce and Christians: there are some misunderstandings around its prevalence. Join hosts Brian Goins and Shaunti Feldhahn as they set the record straight and learn how keeping God at the center does help to make highly happy couples.

Show Notes and Resources

For your own copy of Shaunti Feldhahn's book, "The Surprising Secrets of Highly Happy Marriages", head to her website
George Barna Study: The episode refers to the misinterpretation of a study by George Barna regarding divorce rates among different belief systems.
Brad Wilcox: University of Virginia researcher who provided data showing the correlation between church attendance and lower divorce rates.
FamilyLife has a brand-new course to help you strengthen your marriage and move towards more joy. Learn more about the the all-new Art of Marriage at artofmarriage.com!

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Secret 10: Heart Unprotected—Vulnerabillity in Relationships Aug 15, 2024

Can you keep an eye on the exit and have a happy marriage? Some couples keep separate bank accounts just in case. But in this episode, Brian Goins and Shaunti Feldhahn explore how vulnerability in relationships—being "all in" with your spouse—leads to greater trust and happiness.

Show Notes and Resources

For your own copy of Shaunti Feldhahn's book, "The Surprising Secrets of Highly Happy Marriages", head to her website .
Learn more about the 30-Day Kindness Challenge at https://www.jointhekindnesschallenge.com/.
FamilyLife has a brand-new course to help you strengthen your marriage and move towards more joy. Learn more about the the all-new Art of Marriage at artofmarriage.com!
And for more resources on building a happy marriage and family, check out familylife.com.

See cru.org/us/en/about/privacy FamilyLife’s Privacy Policy

Secret 9: Happy Couples Communicate Openly (Not Brutally) Aug 05, 2024

We can all agree that open communication is good for healthy relationships. But is there such a thing as being 'too honest'? Listen in as hosts Brian Goins and Shaunti Feldhahn discuss!

Show Notes and Resources

For your own copy of Shaunti Feldhahn's book, "The Surprising Secrets of Highly Happy Marriages", head to her website [https://shaunti.com/tb-books/surprising-secrets-highly-happy-marriages/].
Learn more about the 30-Day Kindness Challenge at https://www.jointhekindnesschallenge.com/.
FamilyLife has a brand-new course to help you strengthen your marriage and move towards more joy. Learn more about the the all-new Art of Marriage at artofmarriage.com! And for more resources on building a happy marriage and family, check out familylife.com.

See cru.org/us/en/about/privacy FamilyLife’s Privacy Policy

Secret 8: Highly Happy Couples Hang Out (ft. Dr. Brad Wilcox) Jul 30, 2024

Struggling to get a consistent date night? Not to worry. Hosts Brian Goins and Shaunti Feldhahn are joined by Dr. Brad Wilcox, renowned sociologist specializing in marriage and family research, as they share tips for a great marriage—even without a budget or a babysitter.

Show Notes and Resources

Learn more and connect with Dr. Brad Wilcox at https://ifstudies.org/brad-wilcox.
His new book "Get Married: Why Americans Must Defy the Elites, Forge Strong Families, and Save Civilization" can be purchased here or anywhere books are sold.
Learn more about his work and research with the National Marriage Project at the University of Virginia at nationalmarriageproject.org/ and the Institute for Family Studies at ifstudies.org.
FamilyLife has a brand-new course to help you strengthen your marriage and move towards more joy. Learn more about the the all-new Art of Marriage at artofmarriage.com and get 20% off with the code "Benefits".
Weekend to Remember is FamilyLife's getaway for couples, at the intersection of faith-based marriage conference and romantic retreat from everyday life. Want to foster more oneness in your marriage? Learn more and find one near you at weekendtoremember.com.
And for more resources on building a happy marriage and family, check out familylife.com.
For your own copy of Shaunti Feldhahn's book, "The Surprising Secrets of Highly Happy Marriages", head to her website [https://shaunti.com/tb-books/surprising-secrets-highly-happy-marriages/].
Looking for a new resource for your small group? Check out FamilyLife's small group studies in our shop!
Check out Married with Benefits on YouTube [Link: https://www.youtube.com/playlist?list=PLSzse1nmlqbKytpFD6blgrimXPYZoi-_J ]

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Secret 7: Your Marriage's Secret Language (ft. Jen Goins) Jul 25, 2024

Ever notice some couples seem to have a secret language? Maybe it looks like little loving gestures saying, "I appreciate you." "I forgive you." "I want to hear what you have to say about that." Jen Goins joins hosts Brian Goins and as they discuss the 7th secret of highly happy couples!

Show Notes and Resources

Weekend to Remember is FamilyLife's getaway for couples, at the intersection of faith-based marriage conference and romantic retreat from everyday life. Want to foster more oneness in your marriage? Learn more and find one near you at weekendtoremember.com.
Looking for a new resource for your small group? Check out FamilyLife's small group studies in our shop!
Learn more about the Five Love Languages at 5lovelanguages.com.

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Secret 6: Factual Fantasies: How to Get Yours Jul 18, 2024

Not all fantasies are created equally, in fact, one kind is the leading cause of unhappiness in marriage. But how do you avoid pitfalls and pursue contentment with your spouse? Tune in as hosts Brian Goins and Shaunti Feldhahn continue discussing the fifth secret of highly happy couples!

Show Notes and Resources

Weekend to Remember is FamilyLife's getaway for couples, at the intersection of faith-based marriage conference and romantic retreat from everyday life. Want to foster more oneness in your marriage? Learn more at weekendtoremember.com
For your own copy of Shaunti Feldhahn's book, "The Surprising Secrets of Highly Happy Marriages", head to her website.
Check out Married with Benefits on YouTube
FamilyLife has a brand-new course to help you strengthen your marriage and move towards more joy! The the all-new Art of Marriage is masterfully designed to inspire and equip today’s couples: whether newly married, seasoned, empty nesters, or part of a blended family.
And for more resources on building a happy marriage and family, check out familylife.com.

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Secret 5: Who's In Charge Here? Emotional Management in Marriage Jul 11, 2024

Do you manage your emotions...or do they actually manage you? Learn how deliberate emotional management can promote your happiness—both maritally and otherwise. Join special guest, Jeff Feldhahn, and hosts Brian Goins and Shaunti Feldhahn as they discuss secret 5 of highly happy couples!

Show Notes and Resources

Weekend to Remember is FamilyLife's getaway for couples, at the intersection of faith-based marriage conference and romantic retreat from everyday life. Want to foster more oneness in your marriage? Learn more and find one near you at weekendtoremember.com.
For your own copy of Shaunti Feldhahn's book, "The Surprising Secrets of Highly Happy Marriages", head to her website.
FamilyLife has a brand-new course to help you strengthen your marriage and move towards more joy! The the all-new Art of Marriage is masterfully designed to inspire and equip today’s couples: whether newly married, seasoned, empty nesters, or part of a blended family.
And for more resources on building a happy marriage and family, check out familylife.com.

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Secret 4: On Keeping Score Jul 04, 2024

You've probably heard the marriage advice: don't try to keep score. Hosts Brian Goins and Shaunti Feldhahn suggest there's one tally that might actually be good to track in Christian marriage—find out what it is!

Show Notes and Resources

For your own copy of Shaunti Feldhahn's book, "The Surprising Secrets of Highly Happy Marriages", head to her website.
Learn more about the 30-Day Kindness Challenge at jointhekindnesschallenge.com.
FamilyLife has a brand-new course to help you strengthen your marriage and move towards more joy! The the all-new Art of Marriage is masterfully designed to inspire and equip today’s couples: whether newly married, seasoned, empty nesters, or part of a blended family. And for more resources on building a happy marriage and family, check out familylife.com.

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Secret 3: On Going to Bed Mad, with Jen Goins Jun 27, 2024

Going to bed angry or not: if someone's giving you advice for marriage, they likely have an opinion. And doesn't the Bible take a stance? Join hosts Brian Goins and Shaunti Feldhahn for a fresh take on how to deal with anger in marriage — a normal part of the human experience — at bedtime and beyond. You'll leave this episode with perhaps a fresh perspective, as well as practical tips on handling conflict, communication, and, yes, anger.

Show Notes and Resources

FamilyLife has a brand-new course to help you strengthen your marriage and move towards more joy. Learn more about the the all-new Art of Marriage at artofmarriage.com! And for more resources on building a happy marriage and family, check out familylife.com.
For your own copy of Shaunti Feldhahn's book, "The Surprising Secrets of Highly Happy Marriages" on FamilyLife's shop.
Learn more about Shaunti on her website, Shaunti.com

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Secret 2: 5 Little Ways to Grow Happiness In Marriage Jun 20, 2024

Looking for some happy vibes in your marriage? Learn about the 'fantastic five' small but mighty try-now practices to grow happiness in your marriage.

Show Notes and Resources

FamilyLife has a brand-new course to help you strengthen your marriage and move towards more joy. Learn more about the the all-new Art of Marriage at artofmarriage.com! And for more resources on building a happy marriage and family, check out familylife.com.
For your own copy of Shaunti Feldhahn's book, "The Surprising Secrets of Highly Happy Marriages" on FamilyLife's shop.
Learn more about Shaunti on her website, Shaunti.com

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The First Secret of Highly Happy Marriages Jun 13, 2024

You know what they say about making assumptions, right? But there's one kind of assumption that can dramatically improve your marriage. Hosts Brian Goins and Shaunti Feldhahn discuss first secret of highly happy marriages on today's episode of Married with Benefits. Learn how one foundational mindset shift can help you move from frustration to affection and from grumpy to gracious.

Show Notes and Resources

FamilyLife has a brand-new course to help you strengthen your marriage and move towards more joy. Learn more about the the all-new Art of Marriage at artofmarriage.com! And for more resources on building a happy marriage and family, check out familylife.com.
For your own copy of Shaunti Feldhahn's book, "The Surprising Secrets of Highly Happy Marriages" on FamilyLife's shop.
Learn more about Shaunti on her website, Shaunti.com

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The Highly Happy Marriage: Is That a Thing? Jun 06, 2024

"Highly happy" is possible for marriage. But how do you get there? Change—even "good" change and growth—can be uncomfortable! Join hosts Brian Goins and Shaunti Feldhahn for a roadmap for perseverance in relationship growth, towards the highly happy marriage you dream of.

Show Notes and Resources

FamilyLife has a brand-new course to help you strengthen your marriage and move towards more joy. Learn more about the the all-new Art of Marriage at artofmarriage.com! And for more resources on building a happy marriage and family, check out familylife.com.
For your own copy of Shaunti Feldhahn's book, "The Surprising Secrets of Highly Happy Marriages" on FamilyLife's shop.
Learn more about Shaunti on her website, Shaunti.com

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Is Marriage Past its Prime? Dr. Brad Wilcox May 23, 2024

Is marriage worth it? If you've never wondered yourself, you may have had someone ask you that question. In this special teaser episode to Season 4 of Married with Benefits, hosts Shaunti Feldhahn and Brian Goins are joined by Dr. Brad Wilcox, a renowned sociologist specializing in marriage and family research. Dr. Wilcox is a Professor of Sociology and Director of the National Marriage Project at the University of Virginia, as well as the Future of Freedom Fellow at the Institute for Family Studies.

Join us for this conversation exploring why more and more people are doubting marriage's value and what the research actually says. You'll also learn data-backed practical advice for building a happy marriage and family -- for yourself or for a friend!

Show Notes and Resources

Learn more and connect with Dr. Brad Wilcox
His new book "Get Married: Why Americans Must Defy the Elites, Forge Strong Families, and Save Civilization" can be purchased hereor anywhere books are sold.
Learn more about his work and research with the National Marriage Project at the University of Virginia at nationalmarriageproject.org and the Institute for Family Studies at ifstudies.org.
FamilyLife has a brand-new course to help you strengthen your marriage and move towards more joy! The the all-new Art of Marriageis masterfully designed to inspire and equip today's couples: whether newly married, seasoned, empty nesters, or part of a blended family. And for more resources on building a happy marriage and family, check out familylife.com.

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8. Is Your Sex Life Missing the Point? Mar 28, 2023

Could your sex life be missing the point? Dr. Michael Sytsma talks about why we have sex…and the key to wow-level sex that changes everything.
Show Notes and Resources

Download our app to listen to Brian Goins, Michael Sytsma and Shaunti Feldhahn as they cover more questions.
For more from Shaunti Feldhahn, visit Shaunti.com.
Grab Shaunti and Dr. Sytsma's book in our shop: Secrets of Sex and Marriage: 8 Surprises That Make All the Difference.

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7. When Sex is Boring Mar 21, 2023

Has your married sex coasted into the blahs? Sex therapist Dr. Michael Sytsma's got solutions to keep you both captivated in the bedroom.
Show Notes and Resources

Download our app to listen to Brian Goins, Michael Sytsma and Shaunti Feldhahn as they cover more questions.
For more from Shaunti Feldhahn, visit Shaunti.com.
Grab Shaunti and Dr. Sytsma's book in our shop: Secrets of Sex and Marriage: 8 Surprises That Make All the Difference.

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6. When Sex is Painful: Dr. Michael Sytsma Mar 14, 2023

Sex can be painful in more ways than one: from trauma, to physical pain, to porn. But these don't need to doom your relationship. Sex therapist Dr. Michael Sytsma offers ideas to transform hurt to eventual healing and wholeness.
Show Notes and Resources

Download our app to listen to Brian Goins, Michael Sytsma and Shaunti Feldhahn as they cover more questions.
For more from Shaunti Feldhahn, visit Shaunti.com.
Grab Shaunti and Dr. Sytsma's book in our shop: Secrets of Sex and Marriage: 8 Surprises That Make All the Difference.

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5. Not Tonight? Why Good Signals Make Sexual Sparks Fly: Dr. Michael Sytsma Mar 07, 2023

Initiating or declining sex: It's tricky. Are your signals clear to your spouse? Sex therapist Dr. Michael Sytsma helps you with “not tonight” and “yes, please.”
Show Notes and Resources

Download our app to listen to Brian Goins, Michael Sytsma and Shaunti Feldhahn as they cover more questions.
For more from Shaunti Feldhahn, visit Shaunti.com.
Grab Shaunti and Dr. Sytsma's book in our shop: Secrets of Sex and Marriage: 8 Surprises That Make All the Difference.

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4. When Your Married Sex Life Hits a Snag Feb 28, 2023

Wondering how to keep your married sex life sizzling—or just move around conflict or hurt? Sex therapist Dr. Michael Sytsma helps you troubleshoot.
Show Notes and Resources

Download our app to listen to Brian Goins, Michael Sytsma and Shaunti Feldhahn as they cover more questions.
For more from Shaunti Feldhahn, visit Shaunti.com.
Grab Shaunti and Dr. Sytsma's book in our shop: Secrets of Sex and Marriage: 8 Surprises That Make All the Difference.

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3. Sexual Desire: What to Do When You’re Not on the Same Page Feb 21, 2023

Does one of you want more sex than the other? Sex therapist Dr. Michael Sytsma offers ideas and insight to work through differences in sexual desire.

Show Notes and Resources

Download our app to listen to Brian Goins, Michael Sytsma and Shaunti Feldhahn as they cover more questions.
For more from Shaunti Feldhahn, visit Shaunti.com.
Grab Shaunti and Dr. Sytsma’s book in our shop: Secrets of Sex and Marriage: 8 Surprises That Make All the Difference.

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2. What if My Spouse Doesn’t Want Me? Sex Drive in Your Marriage Feb 14, 2023

Does one of you want more sex than the other? Sex therapist Dr. Michael Sytsma offers ideas and insight to work through differences in sexual desire.
Show Notes and Resources

Download our app to listen to Brian Goins, Michael Sytsma and Shaunti Feldhahn as they cover more questions.
For more from Shaunti Feldhahn, visit Shaunti.com.
Grab Shaunti and Dr. Sytsma’s book in our shop: Secrets of Sex and Marriage: 8 Surprises That Make All the Difference.

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1. When It Comes to Sex Drive–What’s Normal? Feb 07, 2023

When it comes to sex…what’s normal? Sex therapist Dr. Michael Sytsma and Shaunti Feldhahn discuss research about drive, initiative, and other questions.
Show Notes and Resources

Grab Shaunti and Dr. Sytsma’s book in our shop: Secrets of Sex and Marriage: 8 Surprises That Make All the Difference.

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13: Rapid-Fire: Questions (a lot of) Other Husbands are Asking Jul 13, 2020

Gathered from a live audience at FamilyLife's Love Like You Mean It cruise, Shaunti and Jeff Feldhahn and Brian Goins answer a variety of questions from husbands--like, "Why does she ask for my opinion, then do her own thing?" "Why does she pick on my tone of voice?" "Why doesn't she say what she means?" "How can I convince her I think she looks good?" "How am I supposed to avoid fix-it mode when she talks?"
Show Notes and Resources

For more from Shaunti Feldhahn, visit Shaunti.com. https://shaunti.com
Sign up for the "I Do Every Day" devotional series. https://www.familylife.com/ido/
Come join us for romance and relaxation in 2021 on FamilyLife's Love Like You Mean It® marriage cruise. https://www.lovelikeyoumeanitcruise.com/
Check out all that's available on the FamilyLife Podcast Network. https://www.familylife.com/familylife-podcast-network/
Your generous support of FamilyLife helps create podcasts like Married With Benefits™. https://donate.familylife.com/married-with-benefits/

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12: Why Does My Wife Expect Me to Read Her Mind? Jul 06, 2020

Trying to figure out why your wife expects you to know what she's thinking? Does trying to interpret all that mystery feel frustrating, even exhausting? Brian, Shaunti, and guest Jim Mitchell explore how to uncover what's whirring beneath the surface in a way that makes your wife feel known--and significantly improve your relationship.
Show Notes and Resources

For more from Shaunti Feldhahn, visit Shaunti.com. https://shaunti.com
Sign up for the "I Do Every Day" devotional series. https://www.familylife.com/ido/
For Men Only by Shaunti Feldhahn. https://shop.familylife.com/product/for-men-only-revised-and-updated/
For Women Only by Shaunti Feldhahn. https://shop.familylife.com/product/for-women-only-revised-and-updated/
Check out all that's available on the FamilyLife Podcast Network. https://www.familylife.com/familylife-podcast-network/
Your generous support of FamilyLife helps create podcasts like Married With Benefits™. https://donate.familylife.com/married-with-benefits/

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11: When Conflict with Your Wife Leaves You Defeated Jun 29, 2020

In this episode, Brian, Jen, and Shaunti address the common insecurities husbands experience in conflict with their wives. At work they feel they can tackle anything, but everything changes at home when emotions enter the scene. Are you curious why late-night arguments leave you feeling outmatched? Or why you'd rather withdraw to think before processing together? Listen for the reasons behind your feelings and for some healthy conflict management tips.

Show Notes and Resources

For more from Shaunti Feldhahn, visit Shaunti.com. https://shaunti.com
Shaunti's book The Surprising Secrets of Highly Happy Marriages. The little things that make a BIG difference! https://shaunti.com/tb-books/surprising-secrets-highly-happy-marriages/
From Season 1: Why Is He So Touchy? https://www.familylife.com/podcast/married-with-benefits/2-why-is-he-so-touchy/
Sign up for the "I Do Every Day" devotional series. https://www.familylife.com/ido/
"When Sinners Say 'I Do': Discovering the Power of the Gospel for Marriage" by Dave Harvey. https://www.amazon.com/When-Sinners-Say-Do-Discovering/dp/0976758261
Check out all that's available on the FamilyLife Podcast Network. https://www.familylife.com/familylife-podcast-network/
Your generous support of FamilyLife helps create podcasts like Married With Benefits™. https://donate.familylife.com/married-with-benefits/

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10: My Wife Cries A Lot…Help! Jun 29, 2020

Husbands all over the world struggle to understand and respond to their wife's tears. Considering two thirds of women admit to crying for no reason, they have good reason to. Curious why women cry so much? Shaunti and Brian, joined by Brian's wife Jen, dig into the "why" behind women's tears and some helpful "dos" and "don'ts" as you move towards your wife. Also learn how God responds to our tears.
Show Notes and Resources

For more from Shaunti Feldhahn, visit Shaunti.com. https://shaunti.com
Sign up for the "I Do Every Day" devotional series. https://www.familylife.com/ido/
For Men Only by Shaunti Feldhahn. https://shop.familylife.com/product/for-men-only-revised-and-updated/
For Women Only by Shaunti Feldhahn. https://shop.familylife.com/p-2937-for-women-only-revised-and-updated.aspx
Check out all that's available on the FamilyLife Podcast Network. https://www.familylife.com/familylife-podcast-network/
Your generous support of FamilyLife helps create podcasts like Married With Benefits™. https://donate.familylife.com/married-with-benefits/

See cru.org/us/en/about/privacy FamilyLife’s Privacy Policy

9: Every Hallmark Movie Is The Same. Why Does She Still Watch Those? Jun 16, 2020

In season #1 of Married With Benefits we explained what a wife can learn about the mind of her husband from watching ESPN. Here Brian and Shaunti explain the heart of most wives as revealed in Hallmark movies. What core question is she asking that a good love story answers? What insecurities does she carry that she's hoping you will cover? Good news: You don't need to go ice skating or build a rocking chair out of raw cedar to win her heart every day.
Show Notes and Resources

For more from Shaunti Feldhahn, visit Shaunti.com. https://shaunti.com
Hallmark Christmas Movie Plot Generator: https://wronghands1.com/2019/11/29/hallmark-christmas-movie-plot-generator/
From Season 1: "Why Doesn’t My Marriage Look Anything Like a Hallmark Movie?" https://www.familylife.com/podcast/married-with-benefits/14-why-doesnt-my-marriage-look-anything-like-a-hallmark-movie/
Sign up for the "I Do Every Day" devotional series. https://www.familylife.com/ido/
For Men Only by Shaunti Feldhahn. https://www.familylife.com/podcast/married-with-benefits/9-every-hallmark-movie-is-the-same-why-does-she-still-watch-those/
Check out all that's available on the FamilyLife Podcast Network. https://www.familylife.com/familylife-podcast-network/
Your generous support of FamilyLife helps create podcasts like Married With Benefits™. https://donate.familylife.com/married-with-benefits/

See cru.org/us/en/about/privacy FamilyLife’s Privacy Policy

8: Why Aren’t Decisions Ever Final For My Wife? Jun 08, 2020

Does it feel like decisions are never final with your wife? Does she like to "taaaaaaaaaalk" things thru way too long? And what should you do when it feels like she's questioning a decision you've made and felt was final? Host Brian Goins and Shaunti Feldhahn explore this common experience with humor, wisdom, and insight on how to finally "lock in" her answer.
Show Notes and Resources

For more from Shaunti Feldhahn, visit Shaunti.com. https://shaunti.com
For Men Only by Shaunti Feldhahn. https://www.familylife.com/podcast/married-with-benefits/8-why-arent-decisions-ever-final-for-my-wife/
For Women Only by Shaunti Feldhahn. https://shop.familylife.com/product/for-women-only-revised-and-updated/
Check out all that's available on the FamilyLife Podcast Network. https://www.familylife.com/familylife-podcast-network/
Your generous support of FamilyLife helps create podcasts like Married With Benefits™. https://donate.familylife.com/married-with-benefits/

See cru.org/us/en/about/privacy FamilyLife’s Privacy Policy

7. How can I restore trust after pornography or an affair? Jun 01, 2020

How can a couple restore trust in the area of sexual brokenness (pornography, affairs, etc.)? Licensed sex therapist Dr. Michael Sytsma joins host Brian Goins and Shaunti Feldhahn to instruct husbands and wives on the necessary steps to take to bring the darkness into the light and tenaciously hold on to the God of hope.
Show Notes and Resources

From season 1: "Questions Every Wife is Asking: How Can A Good Man Be Tempted By Porn?" https://www.familylife.com/podcast/married-with-benefits/3-how-can-a-good-man-be-tempted-by-porn/
Meet our guest today, Dr. Mike Sytsma. https://intimatemarriage.org/project/dr-mike/
Are you looking to invest in your marriage or repair broken trust? https://www.familylife.com/weekend-to-remember/
Your generous support of FamilyLife helps create podcasts like Married With Benefits™. https://donate.familylife.com/married-with-benefits/

See cru.org/us/en/about/privacy FamilyLife’s Privacy Policy

6: What Do I Do If My Wife Doesn’t Trust Me? May 25, 2020

As crazy as it sounds, it's not uncommon for trust to be broken within a marriage and the husband not even realize it. Brian Goins and Shaunti Feldhahn are joined by FamilyLife Today co-host Ann Wilson to offer hope and wise counsel for couples needing to restore trust between them.
Show Notes and Resources

For more from Shaunti Feldhahn, visit Shaunti.com. https://shaunti.com
Check out Dave and Ann Wilson's Vertical Marriage Study. https://www.familylife.com/verticalmarriagestudy/
Ready to get away with your spouse for the weekend and invest in your marriage? https://www.familylife.com/weekend-to-remember/
Check out all that's available on the FamilyLife Podcast Network. https://www.familylife.com/familylife-podcast-network/
Your generous support of FamilyLife helps create podcasts like Married With Benefits™. https://donate.familylife.com/married-with-benefits/

See cru.org/us/en/about/privacy FamilyLife’s Privacy Policy

5: Why Does She Ask The Deep Questions At 11pm At Night? May 22, 2020

Have you ever wondered why, just when your mind is shutting down for the night, your wife's mind seems to be just getting started? Married with Benefits host Brian Goins, along with Harvard trained researcher Shaunti Feldhahn, discuss this and reveal a simple truth that explains so much about your wife. And they offer 3 steps you can take to navigate this late-night impasse.
Show Notes and Resources

For more from Shaunti Feldhahn, visit Shaunti.com. https://shaunti.com
If you have a heart for families in your community, and want to see your marriage make a difference in the world, check out FamilyLife Local. https://www.familylife.com/local/
Dr. Gary Chapman and Ron Deal join together in this book to teach you how the five love languages can help your blended family. https://www.5lovelanguages.com/book/building-love-together-in-blended-families/
For more great Ron Deal resources, check out FamilyLife Blended. https://www.familylife.com/familylifeblended/about/
Your generous support of FamilyLife helps create podcasts like Married With Benefits™. https://donate.familylife.com/married-with-benefits/

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4: Why Can’t My Wife Land The Plane In Conversations? May 22, 2020

Husbands, do you get tired head in conversations with your wife as she circles the airport but never lands the plane? Listen as Brian Goins and Shaunti Feldhahn demystify this very common frustration. Understand the brain science behind these exchanges and, more importantly, learn two easy ways to start winning in these moments as the hero of her heart.
Show Notes and Resources

For more from Shaunti Feldhahn, visit Shaunti.com. https://shaunti.com
Sign up for the "I Do Every Day" devotional series. https://www.familylife.com/ido/
Check out all that's available on the FamilyLife Podcast Network. https://www.familylife.com/familylife-podcast-network/
Your generous support of FamilyLife helps create podcasts like Married With Benefits™. https://donate.familylife.com/married-with-benefits/

See cru.org/us/en/about/privacy FamilyLife’s Privacy Policy

3: How Important Is My Physical Appearance to Her Desire of Me? May 22, 2020

Your wife can't really be attracted to your "dad bod" right? A lot of guys assume they need to be workout warriors to be desiraable, but the reality is that a trip to the doctor is probably way more attractive to your wife than another tip to the gym. Brian Goins and Shaunti Feldhahn offer husbands two tips for taking care of yourself, and one question you can ask that your wife will find irresistible.
Show Notes and Resources

For more from Shaunti Feldhahn, visit Shaunti.com. https://shaunti.com
"Achieving a ‘Dad Bod’: Try This Hilarious 21-Day Guide" by David Tate. https://www.rd.com/funny-stuff/how-to-get-a-dad-bod/
"When Sinners Say 'I Do': Discovering the Power of the Gospel for Marriage" by Dave Harvey. https://www.amazon.com/When-Sinners-Say-Do-Discovering/dp/0976758261
For Men Only by Shaunti Feldhahn. https://shop.familylife.com/product/for-men-only-revised-and-updated/
Looking to getaway with your spouse? Check out our 2021 Love Like You Mean It Cruise. https://www.lovelikeyoumeanitcruise.com/
Check out all that's available on the FamilyLife Podcast Network. https://www.familylife.com/familylife-podcast-network/
Your generous support of FamilyLife helps create podcasts like Married With Benefits™. https://donate.familylife.com/married-with-benefits/

See cru.org/us/en/about/privacy FamilyLife’s Privacy Policy

Bonus B: Top 5 All-Star Moves – You got this! May 22, 2020

In episode 2.1 you heard the top 5 "rookie mistakes" of husbands who want more sex with their wives. Now learn from host Brian Goins and Shaunti Feldhahn your top 5 "all-star moves." You got this!

Show Notes and Resources

For more from Shaunti Feldhahn, visit Shaunti.com. https://shaunti.com
For more from Dr. Juli Slattery, visit https://www.authenticintimacy.com/.
Sign up for the "I Do Every Day" devotional series. https://www.familylife.com/ido/
Your generous support of FamilyLife helps create podcasts like Married With Benefits™. https://donate.familylife.com/married-with-benefits/
Check out all that's available on the FamilyLife Podcast Network. https://www.familylife.com/familylife-podcast-network/

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Bonus A: Top 5 Rookie Mistakes – Come on man! May 22, 2020

In episode 2, we were joined by Dr. Juli Slattery, co-founder and President of Authentic Intimacy, to dive deep into the question, "Why can't my wife focus more on sex." Here, host Brian Goins and Shaunti Feldhahn keep it simple as they offer a quick-hit list of the top 5 rookie mistakes of husbands who just want more sex with their wife. Husbands, if you find yourself relating to any of these rookie mistakes...Come on man!

Show Notes and Resources

For more from Shaunti Feldhahn, visit Shaunti.com. https://shaunti.com
For more from Dr. Juli Slattery, visit https://www.authenticintimacy.com/.
Sign up for the "I Do Every Day" devotional series. https://www.familylife.com/ido/
Your generous support of FamilyLife helps create podcasts like Married With Benefits™. https://donate.familylife.com/married-with-benefits/
Check out all that's available on the FamilyLife Podcast Network. https://www.familylife.com/familylife-podcast-network/

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2: Why Can’t My Wife Focus More On Sex? May 22, 2020

Husbands often ask, "Why can't my wife focus more on sex?" Dr. Juli Slattery, co-founder and President of Authentic Intimacy, joins host Brian Goins and Shaunti Feldhahn to answer this important question. Learn how most women are wired sexually; Hint: it's not what you think. Find out how to answer her #1 question and meet her #1 need. Discover why, if God's design seems complicated and frustrating, that's actually a good thing for you and your marriage.
Show Notes and Resources

For more from Shaunti Feldhahn, visit Shaunti.com. https://shaunti.com
For more from Dr. Juli Slattery, visit https://www.authenticintimacy.com/.
Sign up for the "I Do Every Day" devotional series. https://www.familylife.com/ido/
For Men Only by Shaunti Feldhahn. https://www.familylife.com/podcast/married-with-benefits/2-why-cant-my-wife-focus-more-on-sex/
For Women Only by Shaunti Feldhahn. https://shop.familylife.com/product/for-women-only-revised-and-updated/
25 Questions You're Afraid to Ask About Love, Sex and Intimacy by Juli Slattery. https://shop.familylife.com/product/25-questions-youre-afraid-to-ask-about-love-sex-and-intimacy/
Your generous support of FamilyLife helps create podcasts like Married With Benefits™. https://donate.familylife.com/married-with-benefits/

See cru.org/us/en/about/privacy FamilyLife’s Privacy Policy

1: How Long Until My Wife Believes She’s Beautiful? May 22, 2020

Research shows that many women struggle with hidden insecurities and find it difficult to believe that their own husbands see them as beautiful. Brian Goins and Shaunti Feldhahn explain what drives a woman's feelings of inadequacy. They explain what to do and what not to do to overcome her fears in love. Discover practical ways to put her heart at ease and prove how much you truly do delight in your wife.

Show Notes and Resources

For more from Shaunti Feldhahn, visit Shaunti.com. https://shaunti.com
Sign up for the "I Do Every Day" devotional series. https://www.familylife.com/ido/
Your generous support of FamilyLife helps create podcasts like Married With Benefits™. https://donate.familylife.com/married-with-benefits/

See cru.org/us/en/about/privacy FamilyLife’s Privacy Policy

15: Season Finale – Live Women’s Conference Speed Round Sep 30, 2019

Season one of "Married With Benefits" comes to a close in glorious, speed-round fashion as Brian Goins, alongside Shaunti Feldhahn, enters the arena like a gladiator and fields rapid-fire questions live from a women's conference crowd of over 1000. "Why can't my husband multitask?" "Why does he flip channels so fast?" "Why does he go run errands and vanish?" The questions came fast (and sometimes furious), but Brian and Shaunti were up to the task. Find out if your burning question made the show.
Show Notes and Resources

Learn more about upcoming Aspire Women's Events. https://aspirewomensevents.com/
More from Shaunti Feldhahn at Shaunti.com. https://shaunti.com/
Check out all that's available on the FamilyLife Podcast Network. https://www.familylife.com/familylife-podcast-network/

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14: Why Doesn’t My Marriage Look Anything Like a Hallmark Movie? Sep 24, 2019

No, your husband doesn't act like those guys in the Hallmark movies. Not even close. Shaunti Feldhahn and Brian Goins explain why that's by God's design and why it's actually a good thing for you and for your marriage. Don't worry, it doesn't mean you need to cut the Hallmark channel. In fact, there are three ways those movies can make you love your normal, real-life husband even more than you already do!
Show Notes and Resources

More from Shaunti Feldhahn at Shaunti.com. https://shaunti.com/
Check out all that's available on the FamilyLife Podcast Network. https://www.familylife.com/familylife-podcast-network/

See cru.org/us/en/about/privacy FamilyLife’s Privacy Policy

13: Why Does He Ignore the Kids and Me When He Comes Home From Work? Sep 24, 2019

Does your husband sort of “power down” after work right when you need to talk? Shaunti Feldhahn and Brian Goins demystify this common frustration and offer tips for making your evenings more relational. Learn why some questions draw your husband out of his hole, while others prompt only grunts. Gain a simple tip for his drive home that will make life easier on both of you. And discover one thing ESPN knows about gaining and holding your husband’s attention and why you should steal it.
Show Notes and Resources

More from Shaunti Feldhahn at Shaunti.com. https://shaunti.com/
Check out all that's available on the FamilyLife Podcast Network. https://www.familylife.com/familylife-podcast-network/

See cru.org/us/en/about/privacy FamilyLife’s Privacy Policy

12: Why Can’t He Just Listen? Sep 13, 2019

A husband who shifts into "fix it" mode without taking time to truly understand, or glazes over after only 3 minutes of listening, will only frustrate his wife and make the problem worse-the opposite of what he intends. So how can you avoid this very common experience and instead create interactions that leave you feeling heard without treating him like "one of the girls"? Shaunti Feldhahn and Brian Goins explain a process with two critical steps. If he brushes off step 1 or you neglect step 2, you both lose. Bonus: a pro tip just for wives to increase your odds of gaining his ear every time.
Show Notes and Resources

It's Not About The Nail video. (2 min. video) https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=-4EDhdAHrOg
Check out all that's available on the FamilyLife Podcast Network. https://www.familylife.com/familylife-podcast-network/
More from Shaunti Feldhahn at Shaunti.com. https://shaunti.com/

See cru.org/us/en/about/privacy FamilyLife’s Privacy Policy

11: Does My Husband Secretly Want Me to Look Like a Bikini Model? Sep 13, 2019

Do men secretly wish their wives looked like bikini models? Thousands of men were surveyed and the results are in! Listen as Shaunti Feldhahn and Brian Goins explain what the overwhelming majority said and the implications for normal marriages like yours. If you've tortured yourself with feelings of inadequacy or thoughts of never fitting into that ideal dress size again, take heart. Giving your husband what Shaunti calls "gleeful delight" is WAY easier than you imagine, if you're willing to make a little effort and maybe step out of your usual comfort zone.

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10: Can My Spouse and I Have Friends of the Opposite Sex? May 27, 2019

Can you or your husband still have friends of the opposite sex? It’s a lightning-rod question that sparks strong emotions on both sides. Shaunti Feldhahn and Brian Goins say yes, but with a few wise caveats (#itscomplicated). Should you use the “Mike Pence rule” or have no rules at all? How can you keep friendships from going too far? And what are seven diagnostic questions you can ask to guard your marriage without putting your head in the sand?
Show Notes and Resources