Your Kickstarter Sucks

Latest Episodes:

Episode 382: Have No Fear, Swart is Here! Nov 18, 2024

Hi everybody! I have an idea for a crab trap that makes it really hard for crabs to go into the trap, very easy for them to get out, and also it takes up a lot of space on your boat. Basically, it sucks. Hmmm…I think this will be the predominant tool of the industry for, oh, I’ll say, forever. WRONG SHITHEAD! YOU DIDN’T INNOVATE AND NOW YOU’RE DEAD! DEAD LIKE A CRAB!

Also on today’s show we’ve got a nice little mascot for a restaurant of sorts, place to store those pesky eyeglasses, and a phone holder that you can break open to reveal the passphrases for a lottery puzzle. Actually it’s been canceled due to being illegal and stupid. But we didn’t know about this then. Because this episode…is from the recent past! Ah! Like our dreaded crab traps! Enjoy.

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Social Media by Maddalena Alvarez.

YKS Premium – it’ll have you SHITTING your PANTS with laughter! Or, at least, you will have a mildly nice time with your headphones in. Sign up today at Patreon.com/YourKickstarterSucks to hear all the Kickstarters we can’t put on the regular show, help us waste our money on them, and “fan” “favorite” “segments” like the Jokeblogger Top 10 and 2 Agoraphobes Leave The House!

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This holiday season, give the gift of stupid bullshit! Gift subscriptions to YKS Premium are now available at Patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks/gift

This episode of YKS is brought to you by these fine brands:

Uncommon Goods - Common Goods? Uh, yeah, they’re gonna be, uh, THATAWAY —>

As for the rest of us wanting that perfect, unique gift this holiday season, we’ll be heading on over to UNCOMMONGOODS.com/yks to get 15% off our next gift!

Factor - Yum yum yum, I’ll sure have one! This simple near-rhyme may seem silly and fun, but it actually speaks to a universal truth: Food is ever so yummy nummy. But where to get it? Well, ah! Head to factormeals.com/yks50 and use code yks50 to get 50% off your first box and 20% off your next month.

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Episode 381: Everybody Clap Your Hands Nov 11, 2024

I need to simplify my life. I think probably the best way to do that is to start gluing stuff in my house to each other. That way when I want my spoon, hey, my matches are right there. And my hand towels? Well they won’t go missing again, glued such as they are to my desktop keyboard. Don’t ask me why I need them in the same spot. It’s really only something you can understand when your life is as simple as mine.

On today’s show we’ve got, naturally, a way to glue your car keys to your phone, a thing that says it helps people but probably doesn’t (not this show), and a bed that constantly takes your dog’s blood pressure or something. And that’s just the Kickstarters! There’s other stuff in here too, like your friends Mike, JF, and Dan. And oh yeah, the Kickstarters as well. Now where'd I put that danged Post Episode button? It was right here, next to the glue bottle!!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Social Media by Maddalena Alvarez.

Oh that thang is thangin! YKS Premium!

Follow us on Instagram: @YKSPod, TikTok: YourKickstarterSucks and subscribe to our YouTube channel for more video stuff!

This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

Rocket Money - Zoomin on up! Right up to the wonderful heavens! And we’ll be able to get back down, too, thanks to our friends at Rocket Money! It’s a full on financial suite, and you’re in the big bed! Get Rocket Money today at RocketMoney.com/YKS.

Pretty Litter - Oh! Our kitties! How we love our kitties! And we simply must monitor their health. Our friends at Pretty Litte make that darn near simple to do. And it’s so lightweight, it might just weigh less than Mister Biscuits himself! Go to PrettyLitter.com/yks to save 20% on your FIRST order and get a free cat toy.

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Episode 380: My Stupid Baby Thinks I Can Read Nov 04, 2024

Political division! It’s arguably the biggest problem facing society today, or a fake thing that does not exist at all except in the mind of feckless dorks and opportunistic grifters. Who’s to say! Probably us, I would think. Yeah. I think it’s us guys who get to say what everything is. Also some stuff that “is” this week: a type of coffee that doesn’t make you go to the bathroom, an AI that helps you talk to women, and a religious satire movie that feels at least 20 years out of date. Plus, we don’t say anything about putting down dogs in this episode so everyone’s safe from that. If they don’t read this far I guess.

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Social Media by Maddalena Alvarez.

YKS Premium - Want more YKS? You Do?! Oh my god! You have to go to the jail hospital! Haha. That would be crazy. But after all, it is one crazy show. Whether it’s even more Kickstarters, real world adventures, or our beloved series of movie review months, Mike and JF (the guys writing this) are always cooking up something fun over on YKS Premium. And best of all, a fourth thing! Wow!

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This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

Uncommon Goods - (voice of your loved one) Oh goodie! The same old junk! I love it! ← Think this’ll happen this holiday season? Nah, me neither. That’s why Uncommon Goods is so perfect. They’ve got those unusual finds and unique gifts that’ll have your friends and family going “Yippee!” And to get 15% off that next perfect purchase, go to UncommonGoods.com/YKS.

Factor- Food! It’s the great satisfier. From breakfast to lunch to dinner, and everything in between, food is that classic substance known to fill bellies and titillate mouths. Many believe that’s why we love it so much. But it’s so darn expensive and so annoying to make. That, my friends, is where Factor comes in. Delicious meals, quick! And I’m talkin’ all the foods. Head to FACTORMEALS.com/yks50 and use code yks50 to get 50% off your first box and 20% off your next month.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Episode 379: A Candid Conversation with A Reiki Master Oct 28, 2024

What a special episode! We finally got to it! The most cynical Kickstarter we have ever seen! It’s so special to actually get here and know that from here on out, every other unbuildable infrastructure project or card game rip-off or IP cash-in or political pandering or navel-gazing independent film or useless electronic doodad will be at the very least more of a genuine attempt at creating something than the project we talk about on today’s show. I am looking forward to seeing them!

In addition to that hunk of crap, though, on today’s show we’ve got some goofy ass bible shit that feels like the end times, a project that attempts to undo the inevitability of meeting our end, and yep, a card game rip-off. Some nice comforting audio slop to offset the gobsmacking offensiveness of today’s star of the show. And no, I ain’t talkin’ about the boys themselves!! For crying out loud!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Social Media by Maddalena Alvarez.

Miketober may be over, but YKS Premium is not! They’ll never let us stop making these damn episodes! To wit, this week we return to the mines of subpar crowdfunded content with Missed The Cut, our monthly recap of the shit that sucked juuuust a little bit too much. To wit??? The fuck is that about? To wit.

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See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Episode 378: It’s Basically Like The Matrix Oct 21, 2024

HEY! Wake up! I’m guessing you were probably asleep when this episode came out. I mean, we’re asleep for a third of our lives, so we got a decent shot. And I love a damn underdog. Well now that you’re awake, would you like to go to the bathroom and squeeze out like a millimeter of pee? Don’t forget to keep your eyes kind of halfway closed so you don’t get all the way waked up. That always works. Alright now that you’re done and settling back into bed it’s time to relax completely without peeking at the time on the clock. Just kidding, motherfucker! It’s 3am. Now you’re fucked. Might as well listen to the show.

And what a show it is! Today we got a few things I think you’ll like. Well, you will if you like “camera-wires.” And if you like AI-generated football insights mailed to you a year after the actual event, you’ll be in hog heaven. Not to mention if you have an affection at all for F-tier CGI sticking Santa Clause “in the shit”. But onion tear likers? You’re shit outta luck. The rest of yas? Get in here! It’s 3:02am. Time to laugh!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Social Media by Maddalena Alvarez.

YKS Premium - It’s like YKS…on steroids!!! Which I have been considering doing lately. Hey, why not? It could be a cool way to gain respect with few side effects.. This past week, we were joined by Blowback’s Brendan James for a very long and very scary episode all about Stephen King/George Romero joint Creepshow! And this week, to finish off Miketober V, we’re joined once again by the inimitable Howell Dawdy. So now’s the time…watch your movies, take your vitamins, sign up for YKS Premium, and…sleep well…ha ha ha.

Follow us on Instagram: @YKSPod, TikTok: YourKickstarterSucks and subscribe to our YouTube channel for more video stuff!

This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

Rocket Money - Rocket Money can help you set up a custom budget by identifying top spending categories and suggesting areas where you can adjust your spending habits! Now dat sounds nice! Check em out and save yourself some cash at RocketMoney.com/YKS!

Factor - I deserve a restaurant-like experience…but I HATE going to restaurants. So obviously, I’m pretty hard to please. That was, until they introduced the wonderful Factor Meals! Now I’m eating good in MY OWN neighborhood…that’s right. My home. But don’t pay full price! Head to FACTORMEALS.com/yks50 and use code yks50 to get 50% off your first box and 20% off your next month.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Episode 377: Decent Sized Load for a Rat Oct 14, 2024

Eeeeeeeevveeerryyybboooody do the new show dance! Oh yeah! Let’s do it! I see you! Wow, guys, I knew you were super talented and always up for a crazy time, but I had no idea fans of YKS were such groovy groovers! You were really movin that thing! Well let’s put that energy to good use, shall we? By sitting still and quiet for like 2 hours while some other guys talk about the computer. Starting right….NOW!

On today’s show we’ve got a pet memorial which honestly is fine just a little pretentious maybe but not every one of these is gonna be like CyberTruck Pedestrian Scraper, ya know? Sometimes it’s just a silly little doodad. And the idea is it prompts further spontaneous conversation. So get off my ass! And stop dancing! Plus we’ve got a QR code you can finally wear on your lapel, money you can wear on your finger, and a book that I think even the Comic Book Guy would say is the “Worst. Idea. Ever”! ™ . Copyright. Or maybe there’s some other worst ideas on the thing I forget. Only one way to find out…to keep fucking still and listen to the show! And then go on the Pisscord and say if there’s anything weird about it so we can read it and feel bad. Enjoy!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Social Media by Maddalena Alvarez.

YKS Premium - Everyone’s favorite month is here! That’s right, Miketober 1st - Miketober 31st has arrived and you’re finding yourself smack dab in the middle of it all. What’s it all about though? Well, it’s nothing more than the freepiest and deepiest movies ever to grace the silver screen, and the fellas who love em. That’s us! Sign up today at Patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks to get not only Miketobers 1-5, but many more hundreds of hours of similar wacky concepts such as, Simian Month, Orangutember, and, of course, Ape Christmas. Just 5 bananas a month!

Follow us on Instagram: @YKSPod, TikTok: YourKickstarterSucks and subscribe to our YouTube channel for more video stuff!

This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

Pretty Litter - Well, the cat’s gotta doodoo on somethin, don’t it? I reckon cats will never stop doodooing. Lucky for us, we can use their bathroom predilections to help find out if they’re sick! That’s right, you can monitor your cat’s health with Pretty Litter! Plus, it’s lightweight as all get out and they’ll bring it to your door. How? Well, by means of a URL, of course! And here it is: Go toPrettyLitter.com/YKS to save 20% on your FIRST order and get a free cat toy.

The Great YKS Advertiser Survey!Hey help your boys out and answer a coupla harmless q’s about what kinda stuff we could hawk on here. Hawk tuah that is. Just kidding; it’s not that. Head to Gum.FM/YKS if ya don’t mind doin that quick favor. Survey on that thang!

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Episode 376: Beverage Entrepreneur by Night Oct 07, 2024

By day I’m a simple bartender…but by night…ahh!!! I really let my hair down and I become…The Beverage Entrepreneur! No you haven’t stumbled your way into one of the middling lunchpail Comedy Bang Bang episodes that didn’t even make it into the annual Top 10, you’re actually listening to one of the funniest episodes of YKS ever!

On today’s very show, we have a nice Adult Toy that can Help, a sparkling water that will send the wokies reeing, and finally a use for those pesky plastic straws we’re all trying to buy more of. Plus, a few other things, like a celebrity who clearly wasn’t briefed on what the show is about and they get mad halfway through and we kinda gotta just gut it out! Oh well! Discuss it on the subreddit!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Social Media by Maddalena Alvarez.

YKS Premium - Miketober comes but once a year! And so do most of our listeners! Sign up today at Patreon.com/YourKickstarterSucks to catch every pulse-pounding episode and hell, maybe you’ll even bust a nut! I don’t know!

Follow us on Instagram: @YKSPod, TikTok: YourKickstarterSucks and subscribe to our YouTube channel for more video stuff!

This week’s episode is brought to you by these fine brands:

Factor - Head to factormeals.com/yks50 and use code yks50 to get 50% off your first box and 20% off your next month. Unless you hate yummy food?? Buhh??

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Episode 375: The Barnyard Brothers Sep 30, 2024

Go home, YKS…you’re drunk! Oh wait no you aren’t. You’re just making another good ass funny ass episode of the show we all love to listen to. And after all, the show is quite beloved by many all around the world…so why wouldn’t we make more episodes of it? Well maybe we will get bored or hit by a bus or something. But not this week! We did one. And on it, we had some good ass shit such as the following: a movie about how to time travel, a drink that mixes up it own self for you and there’s no booze or mixer in it, and also something called Morphy Richards. Morphy Richards. Well anyway, it sounds funny. So. Bring your sense of humor! It’s required!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Social Media by Maddalena Alvarez.

YKS Premium is the ONLY place you can find the frequently-listened-to, fake movie trivia and plot recap series MIKETOBER! Coming to Patreon this month! And presumably for many years thereafter. But for now, head on over to Patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks to belly up to the movie bar and suck down a bottle of cinema suds with your buds Mike and JF!

Follow us on Instagram: @YKSPod and TikTok: YourKickstarterSucks

This episode of YKS is brought to you by these fine brands:

Rocket Money - Let Rocket Money help you reach your financial goals faster (like a rocket or some other similarly speedy mode of transport!!!) Get Rocket Money today at RocketMoney.com/YKS

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Episode 374: Glass Break at the Church House Sep 23, 2024

I’m out of town so I’m gonna make this one quick, alright? Girl Scout Cookies are cookies sold by Girl Scouts in the United States to raise funds to support Girl Scout councils and individual troops. The cookies are widely popular and are commonly sold by going door-to-door, online, through school or town fundraisers, or at "cookie booths" set up at storefronts.[1] The program is intended to both raise money and improve the financial literacy of girls. During an average selling season (usually January through April), more than one million girls sell over 200 million packages of cookies and raise over $800 million.[2][3] The first known sale of cookies by Girl Scouts was in 1917.[4][5][6] Cookie sales are organized by 112 regional Girl Scout councils[7] who select one of two national bakeries to buy cookies from.[3][8]

Plus we learn about Disease X.

Video of this episode is available at Patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

Follow us on Instagram: @YKSPod and TikTok: YourKickstarterSucks

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Episode 373: Phat Daddies Sep 16, 2024

Where Faith Meets Fun! Where Faith Meets Fun! Where Faith Meets Fun! Right here, on YKS! On today’s show we got dog vitamins, something that improves voicemail somehow (other than making your outgoing message a recording of you in the bathroom with your buddy), and the one and only, the man without whom none of this would be possible, the great Jan-Ove Waldner!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

It may just be mid September…but already our eyes turn…to Miketober! Get all the scaretacular fun on YKS Premium in just a couple of weeks!

Follow us on Instagram: @YKSPod and TikTok: YourKickstarterSucks

This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

Factor - You get a meal! And you get a meal! And you get a meal! Look under your chair…there’s a meal there! That is, if you have a chair on your porch or in your yard or in the office downstairs where the packages get delivered! Because with Factor, it’s never been easier to eat meals. Head to FACTORMEALS.com/yks50 and use code yks50 to get 50% off your first box plus 20% off your next month.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Episode 372: Pumpkin Master’s Sake Bones Sep 09, 2024

Sometimes you’ll look at the title of an episode and think to yourself, “Oh yeah, I remember why the title of the episode was gonna be this. Because we did a good riff on what The Duckcaller’s Lament would be. And then you got some times where you have to write “Pumpkin Master’s Sake Bones” down in the title box, and you wish you could crawl into a hole and die. There are a lot more of those weeks.

Anyway on today’s show, we got Lil’ Entrepreneurs, a movie that feels like a fake movie inside a fake movie, and a nice Guilt App that makes you feel bad for just sitting around doing nothing evil. And plus, God willing, a riff about Sake Bones that justifies this incomprehensible mishmash of an episode title. Please.

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

Whether it’s talking more about Kickstarter, or talking to our friends about old men’s buttholes, YKS Premium is the destination for even more DB and JF content! $5/mo gets you a bonus episode of the show every single damn week, ad free episodes, and access to the exclusive YKS Pisscord! Think of it like a club with a bunch of guys in it who don’t like going to clubs. And oh yeah, I’m the boss.

Follow us on Instagram: @YKSPod and TikTok: YourKickstarterSucks

This episode of YKS is brought to you by these fine brands:

Rocket Money - Save money, dammit!!! With Rocket Money. At RocketMoney.com/YKS

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Episode 371: Social Media for Christians Sep 02, 2024

Weee-hoo!! Yowee!! We got a Class 5 YKS comin in hot so we’re gonna wanna get all the way around it and drop our headphones right in its path! Yeah the first one kind of already did all this but this one has a bunch of 20 year olds in it so…yeeehawww!!! Well I’d keep joking about that crap but I haven’t finished watching it yet. Stick around for part 2 of the Twisters 2 Riff in the next episode description. Until then, you’ll have to be satisfied with an app for battle rapping, a way to keep your desserts warm on the go, and a decidedly unwoke independent movie! It’s a YKS Thing, baby! You probably do understand.

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

YKS Premium – Now that’s what I call YKS! Get 4 or 5 more episodes of our crazy content every month at patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks!

Follow us on Instagram: @YKSPod and TikTok: YourKickstarterSucks

This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

Factor - Oh the food you’ll eat! Oh the snacks you will munch! When you get Factor Meals for Dinner and Lunch! Go to FactorMeals.com/yks50 for 50% off first box plus 20% off your next month

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Episode 370: Tim Allen Jungle Turd Jungle Aug 26, 2024

MORTUY: Oh geez Rick, I don’t know about this one Rick. It looks like we accidentally portaled to a planet where there’s a ruling race of sentient Kickstarter projects! Oh man, oh geez Rick. I just want to go home and pull my pud man. I don’t want to do all this space flying stuff anymore man. Look at that one…it’s like a stupid pirate card game and it’s coming at me! Ahh!! And look over there, it’s a stupid podcast about how we’re all the same! Oh god it’s horrifying. But I think I’m most terrified of the guy who went to do some sex tourism and thought it was cute! Okay that’s a real guy so it’s not really like an alien thing but man that’s really scary, too. Right, Rick? Uhh…rick??

RICK: (Flashing his space credit card) One for booty on the poop deck, please! Morpy I love you.

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

You know how you sometimes see an out of order toilet that people clearly still kept shitting into even though there was no way it could take down even the amount of poop and pee and toilet paper it already had in there? Yep. YKS Premium

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See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Episode 369: Stink House Entertainment Aug 19, 2024

You’re not gonna believe this one! Oh yeah! What! That’s right! It’s more of that CRAZY Thing you love! Oh yeah! YKS! Wahoo!!!!

On today’s Wet and Wild show, we’ve got a graphic novel (comic book), one gross freako’s stupid movie idea warehouse, an app for DUI guys, and more! Wow, that sounds really Wet and Wild. Oh yes it definitely does. So we better get to it! Oh yeah!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

YKS Premium is where you’re gonna wanna go…where nobody knows your name! Yeah we keep it pretty anonymous over there behind the paywall, unless someone stops you in the middle of the street and asks you what you’re listening to, and you have to go, “Uh…I don’t know…Sissy brainwashing mp3s?”

Follow us on Instagram: @YKSPod and TikTok: YourKickstarterSucks

This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

Rocket Money - Huh? What? I thought a broke person said something! Hey it’s 2024 and we could use every little dollar we can get. Big or small, all dollars are important! And a lot of them end up going to subscriptions I couldn’t give 2 flips about. So let’s get Rocket Money in there to help staunch the bleeding! Stop wasting money on things you don’t use. Cancel your unwanted subscriptions by going to RocketMoney.com/YKS.

Factor One “factor” I use to determine my meal-happiness quotient (MHQ) is the amount of good discount I’m apply to my cart! Of course there are many others as well. But, the discount code is the…denominator (??). Well anyway. For a MHQ of over 9000…use code YKS50 at FactorMeals.com/YKS50 to get 50% off your first box plus 20% off your next month while your subscription is active!

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Episode 368: Crowdfunding USA Aug 12, 2024

Time’s a funny thing…here I am waiting to eat some dinner. But hours from now, perhaps even years, you might find yourself sitting down to listen to this episode and awaiting a different meal of your own. Breakfast, perhaps; or even lunch. And yet both of us, wherever we are – WHENever we are – know that we likey to eat some yummy food. Heh. Sometimes this big blue marble we call home just makes me smile.

On today’s episode we’ve got a heap of tech that don’t make much sense at all, some real religious goofball stuff, and a bonus baby project. Hey thanks DB!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

YKS Premium - You ain’t seen nothin yet! Ohhh baby you just ain’t seen nothin yet! Grab video episodes and more at Patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks.

Follow us on Instagram: @YKSPod and TikTok: YourKickstarterSucks

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Episode 367: The Baby Episode Aug 05, 2024

Goo goo! Ga ga! And all the rest. We’re back from our little break with a bundle of joy: that’s right, a new episode of YKS! To celebrate, we’re taking a tour through some of Kickstarter’s most baby-brained ideas. Join us as we discover the baby chain, the cheeky changer, and oh yes, the bottle buggy, plus a few other ways to harm or at least not do much to help the most precious and vulnerable creatures on Earth: future podcasters! Now if you’ll excuse me, it’s time to go clean doo doo off someone’s balls! Oh DAN!!!!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

Think of YKS Premium like one of those surprise births where the mommy goes to the bathroom and then a baby falls into the toilet and she goes “I didn’t even know I was pregnant!” That’s basically the show. And then you gotta fish us out of the toilet. And go to the hospital.

This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

Factor - Just because it’s summer doesn’t mean you get to stop eating food! In fact, many people continue to eat food all year long. And we recommend doing it with Factor. Head to FactorMeals.com/yks50 and use code yks50 to get 50% off your first box plus 20% off your next month

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Episode 366 - The Crotch Doctor Jul 29, 2024

Aw db come on man. Can't be putting crotch on there man. First of all its from the episode, like you're supposed to do with these. Second, as you will learn in this episode, there are something like 8 million crotches on planet earth and basically everybody has one. Now, if I my continue.

Folks, this week we've got a whole mess of new kickstarters to yap about and we're bringing you along for the ride. We got some crotch thing, something for your toilet and holy heck we even got a christian dating app! Ohh we're lonely and we believe in god ohhh. get real. Just playing okay see you guys later.

Music for YKS courtesy of Wavmage, Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman and Mark Brendle. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Art by ExtraNapkins and animation by PremiumContent. Additional research by Zeke Golvin.

Join YKS Premium and unlock exclusive access to video content, ad-free episodes and access to the YKS discord. Over 1 million hours* of premium audio and video content: just one click away.

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Episode 365: 10,000 Laughs or Your Money Back Jul 22, 2024

Step into a multi-sensory experience that combines the pleasure of taste with the benefits of natural ingredients and the power.. of podcasting. That's right its another YKS and I won't stand around jacking you off any futher, ill let you get to it because this one is a real hooter and thats the gods honest truth.

In fact, I believe so much in the strength of this episode that I (Jesse Farar) am personally guaranteeing at least 10,000 laughs this episode or I WILL PERSONALLY refund you from my own pocket.

I say again, Any person whomsoever laughs but 9,999 times, one laugh short of the agreed upon 10,000 laughs, is hereby entitled to FULL compensation by me (Jesse Farrar)

Upgrade to YKS Premium to unlock over one thousand hours of content (probably) There's a lot of shit on there. You gonna tell me there isn't a thousand hours of shit on there? It is probably insanely close. Like 900 hours. I would not be surprised if there were 900 to 1000 hours of content on the YKS Patreon.. One episode is like an hour. and theres like a thousand episodes so you tell me.

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Episode 364: Words are The Architect of Reality Jul 15, 2024

Good Morning Monday Morning! Today I might just feel like taking a look at a few Kickstarters, including a cabinet friend, a watch that helps you fish, and you guessed it, a way to give cops more money! And well, it looks like a great moment of history to check in on an open-carry freak, which we do in this episode because he had a Kickstarter one time. We did record this one a few weeks ago, so that’s pretty lucky! Who could have guessed something insane would happen in the interim. Ah well, neverless. Plus Jeremy Renner is here!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

YKS Premium - I actually think coffee has gotten so expensive that “less than a cup of coffee” no longer has the intended meaning of “very cheap”. So instead I will say that YKS Premium is your destination for hundreds of hours of bonus YKS, including all Miketobers, Jesseuarys, YKS Beach Partys, and exclusive episodes with beloved guests Stefan and John from Blocked Party, Nick and Mitch from the Doughboys, and many many times where we just changed our voices a little bit and pretended we were, like, Leonard Maltin for an hour. Those are very old episodes. Anyway, lots of good stuff on there too so check it out.

Follow us on Instagram: @YKSPod and TikTok: YourKickstarterSucks

This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

Factor - Head to FACTORMEALS.com/yks50 and use code yks50 to get 50% off your first box plus 20% off your next month. Meals. Now that’s what I call, “It’s lunch or dinner”.

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Episode 363: Yoda OS: Truckervision HD Jul 08, 2024

My precious listeners! I come to you once again, hat in hand, and hat on head, to ask you: check out this episode of the show. On this one we got a hat that even I (hatliking man) wouldn’t wear, an application that uses your phone camera to tell you that you are looking at a piece of food, and a crazy guy having a crazy guy kind of time. Plus, All The Rest!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

YKS Premium - Oh it’s a party y’all! The hawk tuah girl is here and she says “The bonus episodes of YKS rock!” Thereby crystallizing forever our place in viral moment history! Wow!

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Episode 362: Unthinkable Worldwide Jul 01, 2024

Just what are these crazy YKS guys up to now? Well it all starts with the “episode introduction”. Many dedicated fans think this is the best part of any YKS episode, but the true fan knows that the show really kicks into gear around the famous 6 pack. That’s the segment of the show where the guys fabricate an extremely realistic frog prop and wing it against the wall a few times. Or, wait, I don’t know. I think it’s something else. Anyway from there it’s basically time to enter the Begging Zone, where they beg the fans not to kill them, and then about 4 more hours of dead air and it’s the end of the ep. On this week’s show, there’s a pool guy and a weird mattress thing and a mailbox idea. And the frog prop comes to life, stands up to Mike and JF, and demands its freedom. Anyway, it’s a hell of an episode. So I personally would recommend checking this one out.

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

YKS Premium - IT’S the place to find Mike and JF and Producer Dan too! They’re all over there waiting for you!

Follow us on Instagram: @YKSPod and TikTok: YourKickstarterSucks

This week’s episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

Factor - You’re gonna wanna go to FactorMeals.com/yks50 to get 50% off your first box plus 20% off your next month. Uhhhh yeah. You’re gonna wanna do that.

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Episode 361: God, Family, Country, Faith, Family, God, FamilyGod and Country God Jun 24, 2024

Copy, paste, copy paste, it’s just that easy to write an episode description, right? Uhh….RIGHT?! On today’s episode of this crazy show we call YKS, we have a political card game, oh actually for some insane reason we basically have two of them. We also have an AI project so delusional and distasteful that I’m actually surprised we are looking at it. And lastly, we have a show by a stupid asshole who doesn’t know anything and he’s boring and sucks. And oh by the way, that’s OUR job! Plus something else so it wasn’t really “lastly” on that one. Anyway there’s some stuff on here so have a nice time I have to go to something else.

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

That awkward moment when it’s Friday and you don’t have any more YKS to listen to…

YKS Premium solves this.

Follow us on Instagram: @YKSPod and TikTok: YourKickstarterSucks

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Episode 360: British Pady Movie Jun 17, 2024

Wow we just had a big storm and my power got knocked out. I wonder if I’ll be able to get the episode uploaded in time! On this episode, which is either now being uploaded or nothing happened in any way at all and I’m sitting in the dark like a caveman, we have a screen you can go into when you pass away, which is nice, another layer of abstraction to paste over the top of any of your personal or professional interactions, which is fantastic, and a stupid little piece of rubber. Hell if there were 3 more of the damn things on here I reckon that would make for a great episode. Which there are, and it did/does! So listen to it! Even though it’s summer time and we’re all doing a lot better stuff than listening to our phones, such as (??) and (???).

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

YKS Premium - Ayy, where the party at! Girls is on the way, where the Bacardi at! It’s at YKS Premium! Where we really let our hair down and go crazy! Last Friday we had our friend Zöe Ligon on the show to debut our Miketober Minis with Death Spa (1988)! And this Friday, we will be going Catfish Noodlin’ on the Ol’ Mississip! Just kidding it will be a normal episode where we are sitting down inside and looking at the computer.

Follow us on Instagram: @YKSPod and TikTok: YourKickstarterSucks

This week’s episode of YKS is brought to you by these fine brands:

Factor - Yum yum yum! Food isn’t gum! That’s right gang you have to eat better stuff than gum, and our friends at Factor have just what you need! Head to Factormeals.com/yks50 and use code yks50 to get 50% off your first box plus 20% off your next month.

Rocket Money - Vroom vroom! Rocket Money is taking you straight to Planet Savings. Hop aboard! Oh but you can’t take those stupid subscriptions with you. That’s okay, right? You want to go to Planet Savings, don’t you, bud? Cancel unwanted subscriptions by going to RocketMoney.com/YKS! Now!

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Episode 359: Monsters At The Doctor Jun 10, 2024

I just thought of a guy called “Mr. Electricity”. He could probably zap around and do a lot of fun stuff…plus he would have electricity! Nobody will ever make a movie of this brainless superhero idea I just crapped out in 5 seconds. No. Instead, we’ll all march to the googooplexes to see the latest Noah Baumbach dramedy set in in New York City like the dutiful little consumers we all are. I’m so sick of how Creatives are Punished! Luckily, on today’s show we are giving back to the true creative minds of the earth, by highlighting their wonderful Kickstarter ideas, such as: a fan you put on kids’ food to cool it down, a game you play on Thanksgiving only, and an AI way to talk to your dead grandma. For this public service, we ask nothing in return. Except to please listen to the show, rate us on iTunes, send us emails and voicemails, follow us on social media, and subscribe to the Patreon. A fair trade…for art, no?

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

YKS Premium! The only place to find The Bryan Files and our many other celebrated journalistic achievements. Join the Patreon today at Patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks and be among the first to see the next ideas we ever come up with.

This episode of YKS brought to you by these fine brands:

HelloFresh - Go to HelloFresh.com/YKSApps for free apps for life or just use your phone. Well those aren’t free, nevermind. But the HelloFresh ones are. So I’d just go there.

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Episode 358: The Pope’s Exorcist 2 Jun 03, 2024

Man it got really hot outside recently. I walked out there in my pajamas and I got super sweaty. I guess that’s summer for you. But now I’m safely inside and I’ll remember next time to not go outside in my pajamas. I might just stay inside for the next 50 or so years! Ha ha. Just kidding. On today’s show, we have the standard AI slopdump, and a little bit “Extra” for ya! Including a bigtime loser pretending he’s not a loser, some kind of cold-making contraption, and finally a pillow that will bring both sides of the aisle together. And is that all? No, I guess not but that’s the gist of the situation. To go beyond the gist, listen to the show now!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

Want more YKS Premium? Er, I mean do you want more YKS. Then go to YKS Premium! This week on the show, we continue our special investigative series with…The Bryan Files.

This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

Factor - I like this website because you get food from it. Use code yks50 at FactorMeals.com/yks50 to get 50% off your first box plus 20% off your next month while your subscription is active!

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Episode 357: Beauty and the Feast May 27, 2024

What more could be said about Episode 357 that hasn’t already been said…Well, for one thing, I suppose we must note that Webster’s Dictionary defines Episode 357 as “The Episode that takes place in between Episodes 356 and 358.” Interestingly, this Episode would go on to become one of the many episodes of YKS released for public consumption in the year 2024. Well if that doesn’t beat all! But what made this episode of YKS so remarkable? An inscrutable lifestyle brand? A stupid fucking sculpture? An actual fascist militia fundraising on the stupid spinning top and board game website? Whatever the case, it certainly has gone down in history as one of the things you can hear on your phone. Which you can start doing…now! Now that you’ve read the description of the episode which you always do first. Thanks.

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

YKS Premium ← This is where I would go if I wanted more YKS. Just sayin…

This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

Rocket Money - Rocket Money!!!! You da man!!! Stop wasting money on stuff you don’t need. Use Rocket Money…and let the Money “Rocket” (rock it)! At RocketMoney.com/yks

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Episode 356: Circus World After Dark May 20, 2024

Are you ready to challenge your understanding of wealth building and market dynamics? Imagine for a moment, what if everything you thought you knew about markets was wrong? Well honestly, it probably fucking is. I’m so stupid I thought a baggage service that took my bags from the airport and delivered them to me later was good. I thought a stair-vacuuming robot was worth several million dollars. I even thought there should be a paintball gun attached to a security camera that shot anyone who walked near my house. But of course, I was wrong. And that’s why I’ll never become The Market Genius. Will you? Listen to this episode to find out!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

YKS Premium – with 750 hours of exclusive, ad-free content available, there has to be at least a few good ones, right? Well, our thousands of satisfied customers can’t possibly be wrong! Or dead with credit card numbers still functioning. There’s no way, right? That would be insane. Anyway there is a ton of stuff there that’s good to hear. I think this week we may even get an update on our of old favorite “jokey” sites…It’s JokeBlogger if you don’t remember.

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Episode 355: It’s McHappy Day May 13, 2024

We're a Christian Youtube channel that creates nursery rhymes! Just kidding. We’re a comedy show that you can listen to when you are sweeping up the floor or folding a towel and going “ah crap that looks stupid” and then folding it a different way. But really, at the end of the day, does it matter what the towels look like when they’re just gonna get dragged all over your butt and stuff anyway? Something to think about. Perhaps while listening to a show!

On today’s show – ah, there’s that word again – we have an item that can both style AND color your hair at the same time, an app that lets you review someone as just like a person, and probably one of the craziest things I have ever seen to boot! Sounds like quite the “show”! And yet, you have to “hear” it. This crazy language of English…it always finds a way to entertain. And so, I hope, do we. Don’t email us if we don’t, though.

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

YKS Premium - It’s basically YKS on steroids.

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Episode 354: 6 Nights at Crazy’s May 06, 2024

Oh! Hey! Good morning! Afternoon! Evening! Night! I hope you’re having fun listening to the show! That’s annoying, huh? Sorry. I thought it might be kind of cool to start off the episode description with a kind of singsong chant. But you hated it. And now you’re mad. I’ll just have to make it up to you with a cool! Classic! Ep of the show! When will I stop chanting, I bet you’d like to know!!

On this week’s episode of the show we got a way to track your dog’s heart rate, a device that helps you carry six beers (what would you even call that??) and a cock ring. That’s it, really. It’s just a cock ring. And you know what that thing’s all about. But we’re willing to tell you even more. And we don’t chant about it. On an all-new episode of YKS!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

YKS Premium! THIS is where you gotta go at and listen to the, at the — the show that we are the doing to uh show. :-)

This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

Rocket Money - Well I guess if you had 400,000 mrillion trillion dollars it wouldn’t matter too much to you about saving money. But there’s only a few guys like that. And they are so so busy doing their work that they don’t have time to listen to podcast ads. So this is for the rest of us guys who could save a coupla dollars! Stop wasting money on things you don’t use. Cancel your unwanted subscriptions by going to RocketMoney.com/YKS.

Factor - Don’t have FOMO! Fear of Missing Out! Instead, get FOMO - Factor On Mouth Oh! My goodness, that’s what you’ll be saying when you eat these delicious meals. At your door in mere days! Ooo la la! Head to FactorMeals.com/yks50 and use code yks50 to get 50% off your first box plus 20% off your next box.

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Episode 353: Eighteen Moths Apr 29, 2024

This is going to be a short description today because the delivery guy came to the house at 6am and startled my dog, who went crazy and woke me up. I didn’t ask for the thing to be here that early but that’s okay. I should know better than to order stuff. Or have a dog or go to sleep or any of that stuff. I look stupid now. And I feel quite stupid as well. But, I do have my item. And I love it.

On this episode we got a nice way to mangle your hands that doesn’t even require your hands to do it, a doorbell so stupid not even I want it, and a mind-reading guy inventing a card game. There’s 3 other ones also, which makes sense if you’ve paid attention to the show at all. Although it is my understanding that many of you use it as a sleep aid, so, nevermind. Wake up asshole it’s a package!!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

YKS Premium – It’s basically what we’re doing every time you knock on the door and we say “Go away! Leave us alone! We’re not doing anything!” Last week we went to a Simpsons pop-up and had a normal amount of fun at it. And who knows what we’ll get up to next! Maybe another kind of pop-up!

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Episode 352: Laptop in Car! Laptop in car! Apr 22, 2024

Elegance in your palm! Elegance in your palm! We all crave it, and we’d all do anything to have it…but would we spend $28? Perhaps not. On today’s show we answer that question and many others, up to and including, “Laptop in car?” and “Why do they call it oven when you of in the cold food of out hot eat the food”! Plus, JF takes his rightful L. What a pathetic excuse for a man. Let’s light his ass up, by listening to today’s episode!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

Need more of that YKS shit in ya life? I recommend subscribing to YKS Premium! I’d be lying if I said it wasn’t good, and I would absolutely lie to you in a heartbeat, but luckily at this time I don’t have to. The show is just that damn good. Last week we had on the great Howell Dawdy, and even though it seems like between this voicemail and the the premium episode that we are becoming dangerously Howell-obsessed, they were recorded like a month apart so it’s totally normal! Howell shows off some of his collection of freaks, which we love to see, and I daresay we even learn a little along the way. But that’s just Howell’s way.

Check out Movie Night with Big Howell and our own DB at twitch.tv/bighowelldawdy

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Episode 351: Gandalf’s Dad Apr 15, 2024

We love our wonderful celebs, don’t we folks! Or, wait, maybe we don’t love them! I don’t know, I’m going to have to check the list. Now I feel like Santy Claus…but it’s only April! Good gravy this is a confusing episode and it’s only the description part. Just wait til you get to the listening part of the show. And when you do, what you’ll hear is a hell of a lot of laughs, some serious personal insults, and a list of women that teenagers on the computer have decided they don’t like. Plus: a Nespresso machine that can shoot out stuff that makes you go to sleep instead (reverse Nespresso), Brandage by Antix, and yet another toilet brush. Just when you think you’ve seen them all. Another toilet brush. Wahoo!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

YKS Premium - “It’s so good we’re not going to do AI to it!” - Andreessen Horowitz

Okay they didn’t say that…but what if they did?! Well anyway, check out YKS Premium to get even more YKS, which has surely got to interest some of you, statistically speaking. Coming up this month: the return of Howell Dawdy’s beautiful Freak Show, a YKScapades to “Springfield”, a call-in show and more! Only at https://www.patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks!

This week’s episode sponsored by these fine brands:

Rocket Money - Rocket Money!!! I’m strapped to the outside of the thing and I’m shooting off to Planet Savings!! Sorry for saying that I’m “shooting off”, but that’s how much saving money means to me. Stop wasting money on things you don’t use. Cancel your unwanted subscriptions by going to RocketMoney.com/YKS.

Factor - I eat breakfast, lunch and dinner…I’m eating it in summer, spring, winter! That’s something I’ve been chanting around the house lately, and I have recently been calling it the “Factor Meals Chant”. I take my shirt off and scream it all night! Haha. Head to FactorMeals.com/yks50 and use code yks50 to get 50% off your first box plus 20% off your next box

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Episode 350: The Necessity of Cream Apr 08, 2024

I like driving my car but I don’t like getting run into by other cars. That’s why I came up with the “please don’t run into me” sign, which you can put in the car or take it with you on the plane or wear around your neck. It’s basically good wherever you don’t want to get hit by stuff. As far as I can tell, no one has come up with this idea before, which probably means I’m good to go. La la la la…ho ho ho…tee hee hee. ← What da HELL!?

On today’s show we got that thing I am kind of talking about up there, plus a thing that makes eating ice cream even easier (can you believe it?), a healthier (?) way to make cold brew, and honestly the grossest, most insane way I’ve ever seen of brushing your teeth. I mean it does everything wrong. I truly don’t get it. Maybe someone will explain it to me. Oh please…someone help me!! I need help!!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

YKS Premium - Now THIS is the stuff right here. More JF, more DB, more DAN?! Are you kidding me? If that’s a single penny short of $1,000,000 a month it will have been a steal and a deal. Don’t tell me what it costs! I don’t want to know! I just want to take my $1,000,000 and go away somewhere!

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Episode 349: My Girlfriend, The Computer Apr 01, 2024

Listen up, gang. It’s time to describe the episode. This is basically a way of telling you, the listener, what you might be in for when you download or stream this particular episode of the show. First things first: it starts out with the intro song by the one and only Howell Dawdy. From there [...] Anyway, then we end the show. Another instant classic! Hopefully you enjoyed this description and the podcast itself. Because if not, we’ll probably start freaking out and [...] it’ll be all your fault! Ha ha ha. Happy Easter, gang!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

YKS Premium - Farrarch has ended and Gaperil begins! Nah nah nah. No theme months for a little bit. So we’re talking classic YKS Premium - What The Funds, Missed the Cuts, YKScapades and more…all in video and all without the guilt of not watching the garbage movie we’re talking about for 2 hours! Only at patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks! We are doing Gapetember though.

This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

Factor - What’s better than one discount? Two discounts! And when the discount is on food you can eat? Forget about it! Well, don’t forget about it…instead, check out Factor, and remember it! Get 50% off your first box plus 20% off your next box at FactorMeals.com/yks50!

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Episode 348: Armed with Seafood Mar 25, 2024

I guess if you think about it, a shrimp kind of looks like a “pew pew”? Isn’t that weird how nowadays we have to have these weird euphemisms for stuff we all talk about all the time cause it’s in the world and that’s the way it is? And we intentionally sound dumber and less comprehensible, trying to outsmart a computer? It’s just odd, I think. And the crazy thing, it’s not even because of woke! It’s because of ads and computer. A combination that we will love for many years to come. On this episode of YKS, it could honestly be anything. It could be about, a, fuckin, water-skiing squirrel. Can you imagine? That would be ridiculous.

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

Farrarch continues! Only on YKS Premium! Skate on over and sign up today to hear the big Farrarch finale, with the one and only Asshole McGee! Oh my god I just found out he died. We got Stefan.

This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands

Rocket Money - Stop wasting money on things you don’t use. Cancel your unwanted subscriptions by going to RocketMoney.com/yks

NordVPN - 🌏 Get Exclusive NordVPN deal here → https://nordvpn.com/YKS It’s risk-free with Nord’s 30-day money-back guarantee! Link is in the episode description ✌️

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Episode 347: Saying Hello to a Man on a Boat Mar 18, 2024

I have cupcake tummy so I’m gonna make this quick. I want you to listen to the show, alright? And I want you to send an email to yourkickstartersucks@gmail.com that says how many times you wipe your butt. And that’s it! Don’t send anything else in there. Just the butt-wipe thing. I have to throw up a cupcake.

On this episode of the show we’ve got one of those things where the guys are trying to sell you the idea that they’re experts in something, but they’ve failed at doing the thing weirdly! Plus we’ve got some flags for rich guys, a little robot it would be fun to hate, and some fucking BLAST PIPES! Check it out!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

YKS Premium is GOATED when wanting to listen to more Mike and JF is the vibe! Y’all crazy MFs are getting 5 episodes of Farrarch this month! And if that ain’t enough, there’s other stuff too! Check it out today at patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks

This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

Factor - Meals to eat, meals to eat, yes they really are my treat! With Factor, every meal is a treat. And best of all, they come to your house, where you live, so you can eat them more easily! Thanks, Factor! Use code YKS50 to get 50% off. Aww, cmon, please?!

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Episode 346: 60 Percent Chips Mar 11, 2024

Who won? Who was snubbed? Who got up to go to the bathroom and missed their big debut? I’m not sure, I didn’t watch it. But someone should write an explainer of it and tell me! Meanwhile, I’ll be rewatching the only Oscars preview that matters and thinking, “Yep, we really got it right.” Another thing we got really right? Today’s episode! Featuring some bad ideas to put in your mouth, ears, and on your head, we really run the gamut of poorly-conceived cranial accessories. Plus: what’s the perfect amount of chips to eat in a day? The answer may surprise you! And if not please see a doctor. New YKS!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

YKS Premium! Ding ding ding! Come and get it! It’s Farrarch all month long and we’ve had some great guests. And some bad movies. But those probably balance out (?) Our friends DeadBlossomJesse and Charlie McDonnell have been thus far kind enough to make an appearance. But there are more friends to come. Friends, movies, and more. That’s what makes YKS Premium “God’s gift to content”. Check it out

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Episode 345: The Amityville Hat Mar 04, 2024

Don’t be a you-know-what! It’s time to plug them old headphones in or slap em on or listen on speaker while on public transit like a lunatic! On today’s show we have another card game that no one should play for any reason, including on pain of death, or if they’re really bored, a piece of ostensible safety technology that is useless when you think it does one thing, then when you find out it doesn’t even do that, it’s completely incredible, and one that’s actually nice. I won’t say what the nice one is, because basically I’m using a marketing technique to get you to listen to the episode. Studies show this is most effective when you were already going to listen to it anyway, and it’s already on your phone, and you were wasting time reading the rambling episode descriptions for some reason. I read about them. On my sabbatical.

Join us in creating a healthier and more equitable future and help us get our show to all! It’s a new YKS!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

Love it or hate it, Farrarch is back! YKS Premium presents a staggering 5 Fridays, even though it seems like it should only be 4, of sequel-loving madness with some wonderful guest stars. Only at patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks!

Factor - I’m about to have a meal my own self, so this may come off as a bit biased…but I love to eat! And with Factor, eating has never been easier. Except for millions of years ago where we all ate algae and stuff like that, I guess. Plus, Factor tastes better than algae! It’s not cheaper. But still, we got a good deal for you. And again, it’s like good food. Not just slime or other cells. Check out FactorMeals.com/yks50 for 50% off your order of good and normal food!

ScentAir -They say that smell is the doorway to the soul. And really, why wouldn’t it be? You smell some stuff and it goes right up into your brain. And your soul’s probably up there, too. And there’s nothing the soul likes more than good scents. Luckily, ScentAir knows all about them. And now, so do you. Go to ScentAir.com/yks to learn how you can save 25% off your first Whisper MAX diffuser and explore other great deals.

RocketMoney - Subscriptions are getting so crazy. TV, Internet, uhhh other forms of entertainment which btw are fine to subscribe to…it’s all too much! Wake me up when I can subscribe to Timothee Chalamet! You know what I’m talking about. Until then, I’m trusting Rocket Money to help me control my monthly budget. I’m coming, Timothee! Stop wasting money on things you don’t use. Cancel your unwanted subscriptions by going to RocketMoney.com/yks.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Episode 344: What If Michael Scott Bought Bitcoin Feb 26, 2024

Welcome to Hooterville! That was almost the title of the episode but we already had one with “ass” in it this month and it felt like it would be a little much. Well anyway that’s a little behind the scenes action from your old friends Mike and JF. And as for the Kickstarters this week, well, they’re sure to not disappoint. Sorry this started to sound like ChatGPT a little bit, I’m watching TV and I’m kind of distracted by the bright lights and sounds and stuff like that. On today’s show we’re talking about a pen with a really really really bad name to have, a housing app with another horrible, shitty name, and some kind of fragrance thing with – you guessed it – a name from fucking hell. Didn’t occur to us during the episode that these things are so poorly named, but now having read the entire episode description, you get the benefit of hindsight. And the benefit of hearing the episode! Which you are doing, or will be doing, right now or soon.

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

YKS Premium - Farrarch II: All Things Being Sequel. Only at patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks

This week’s episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

NordVPN - 🌏 Get Exclusive NordVPN deal here → https://nordvpn.com/YKS It’s risk-free with Nord’s 30-day money-back guarantee! Link is in the episode description ✌️

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Episode 343: YKS Double Impact Feb 19, 2024

Love is in the air! Or it was, anyway, a week or so ago. Because it was that famous day of hearts and candy, Valentine’s. But now we’re celebrating a different kind of love…not romantic love, but rather love for our wonderful presidents of past, present, and future. Which in many ways is even better than finding a partner to share your life and a big box of candy with. Because the presidents are always there, signing documents and so forth. And trust me, a lot of them guys will eat some chocolate with you too.

On today’s show, we don’t talk about that stuff at all because we had no idea what day it was. Instead, we got some idiot who wants to fix up a helicopter on my dime, a couple of pieces of crap to tell you what’s going on with your body like you didn’t already know, and a toilet for the UPS guy. Actually I’m joking about that last one but I think it’s a good idea. Those guys gotta whiz and crap!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

YKS Premium! You’re gonna like what you listen to. I guarantee it. And you can hold me personally responsible if you don’t. - Mr. Mike Hale (official).

This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands

ScentAir - Stuff that smells good keeps you around, and stuff that stinks ushers you out the door. That’s the way it is. And if you ask us, it’s high time businesses learnt this inexorable fact and starting making their places smell good! Well that’s where ScentAir comes in. It also comes into your nose. Isn’t that fun? Go to ScentAir.com/yks to learn how you can save 25% off your first Whisper MAX diffuser and explore other great deals!

Factor - I love lunchies I love dinners, Factor Factor please deliver! And they always do. To your door, that is, in a nice box you can do whatever with after you’ve taken the food out. I personally like to jump inside and pretend that none of my problems can get me in there. But it’s really all up to you. Head to FactorMeals.com/YKS50 and use the code yks50 to get 50% off.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Episode 342: Ass Pizza Feb 12, 2024

Looks like once again Patrick Mahomes is the Super Bowl MVP! It would be kind of funny if I wrote this in advance of the announcement, and I was wrong, and Kansas City didn’t even win. And then you’re reading this like…what the hell! What are they doing over there! Can they do anything right? Haha. Oh yeah they can, they can make me hella laugh, and just vibe…I actually wrote it well after the game ended, though. Because I have an ego the size of a house and I can never be wrong. On today’s show we have a guy using alien technology to look stupid, some 3-D printed stuff that won’t fill the hole in your heart, and – finally – some anti-woke clothing! Big day. Big ep. I’m going to Disneyworld! Nah, nah, nah.

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

YKS Premium - I never leave home without it. And neither should you. What if your phone flies out of an airplane and someone picks it up and they’re going through it on the local news and they get down to your podcast subscriptions and it’s not there? That would suck. Better sign up today. And maybe take a train or something.

This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

Rocket Money - Talking to the cable company is cheeks. Let somebody else do it for ya! And reap the rewards – the things I love to reap. Stop wasting money by going to RocketMoney.com/yks.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Episode 341: Carl’s Jr Big Thick Bacon Olive Branchburger with Cheesepology Feb 05, 2024

Wait…I thought we just recorded an episode? But that would mean…and if he’s over there…and I’m a notoriously prickly leading man whose tangible lack of enthusiasm for nearly all his work, in combination with rumors of my rather unsavory behavior on set, would be enough to blackball me from the industry? No? Okay well good because we got another in-person 2 hour banger to get through, and I’m not going to let any kind of cyclical karmic time loop stop me! On today’s oddly familiar YKS we got shirts and apples, uncles who shoot, and oh geez, maybe a new segment at the end of the show? I sure hope we have time for it! Plus we got a bible AI app, a reality reprogrammer (just in time) and a strange vacuum cleaner you’ve probably never heard of before. Let your fingers do the talking…to the podcast app, that is, and push them to push it to download it to the phone to listen to the show! It’s a new YKS!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

YKS Premium - It’s the ooooooonly way to see what kind of tea we’re drinking. Sign up today for bonus episode of YKS at patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks.

This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

ScentAir - Smell good, or smell bad? Kind of a no brainer. Especially for businesses! Take the store for instance. Hey, don’t mind if I do! Especially since it smells so good! Go to ScentAir.com/yks to learn how you can save 25% off your first Whisper MAX diffuser and explore other great deals

Factor - Wellness is so good…I just wish I could slurp it down in one go instead of (???) the normal stuff you have to do to get it. And if it came with a side of delicious, easy, healthful meals, I guess that would basically be a dream come true. Well pinch yourselves because your dream is now a reality! All ya gotta do is: enter code yks50 at FactorMeals.com/yks50 to get 50% off your first box and 2 free wellness shots per box!

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Episode 340: The Ultimate Calming Egg Jan 29, 2024

I am calm. I have my egg. I am calm. I have my egg!!! Ahhh!!!! No! I’m not calm! I put too much salt on my food by using a normal salt shaker or teaspoon, I moved and all my junk mail didn’t follow me to the new place, I can’t read 120 pages of a book in a minute, and my laundry isn’t getting clean in my air fryer. This sucks and there’s no solution – I ran out of essential oils to put on my calming egg, which has also stopped levitating slightly in its cradle. So I’m doomed. I guess the only thing that could make me feel any better is over 2 hours of wacky conversational comedy for 40 year olds. But who would be doing that in 2024 but the boys at YKS…

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

To support the show and get more JF and DB content than could possibly be healthy, sign up for YKS Premium today! For just $5 a month you can push play to your heart’s content, and stick it to “Big Doctor” – the big doctor we all go to and hate!

This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

NordVPN - 🌏 Get Exclusive NordVPN deal here → https://nordvpn.com/YKS It’s risk-free with Nord’s 30-day money-back guarantee! Link is in the episode description ✌️

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Episode 339: Now Loading… Jan 22, 2024

Now what do ya get when you cross 2 guys who need the internet to work and live and not go insane, and a series of events that results in both of them having their access to the internet become extremely compromised? Well, you get a very long and very funny episode of their collaborative podcast all about crowdfunding and technology, that’s what! On today’s show, which has been edited to within an inch of its life, we’re talking about the movement that’s on the tip of everyone’s tongues: AI! It seems that Artificial Intelligence has been waiting in the wings for its chance in the director’s chair, and so we get a sneak peek at some of the wonderful films sure to be coming our way soon courtesy of this emerging technology. Plus, a mailbox camera and a toy smoking weed. All that, a few crucial edits, and more on this week’s almost-didn’t-get-there episode of YKS!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

YKS Premium - It’s got what listeners crave! Sign up today and hear The Most Beautiful Noise On Earth.

This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

Rocket Money - Stop wasting money on things you don’t use…Oh but I don’t want to! I love wasting money!! Cancel your unwanted subscriptions by going to RocketMoney.com/YKS– No! I hate money!I want it all to go away!

Factor- When it comes to eating food, there ain’t too many things better than meals. And when you can get them delivered straight to your door but still with all the good flavors of food in there, it’s like, well, that’s pretty good isn’t it? Head to FactorMeals.com/YKS50 and use code YKS 50 to get 50% off of all the meals it’s good to have.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Episode 338: Millionaire PS5 Challenge Jan 15, 2024

What if Steamboat Willie did a drive-by…? It’s an interesting question that we can now answer definitively, with the help of the American legal system and, presumably, AI. Pull up a chair (or take it off the wall) and throw on some hedgephones…it’s an all-new YKS!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

YKS Premium…it’s the only way you’re gonna get these guys to put out any more episodes! Until they bring back Stitcher Premium, that is.

This episode of YKS sponsored by these fine brands:

Factor - I’m snowed in, I’m hungry, I definitely won’t be going to any good food restaurants this week. But with Factor, I could care less! These delicious and nutritious meals have me saying “Restaurant Who?!” Try ‘em yourself at Factormeals.com/yks50 and get 50% off!

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Episode 337: The In-Person Guys Jan 08, 2024

DB and JF are back together in the studio (of sorts) once again…and the vibes, as they say, are immaculate. On today’s episode, we got a LIVE update on an old Kickstarter, a new way to play chess, a new way to wash dishes, and a very old way of communing with nature…might as well spit!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

I what YKS Premium! I really what it!

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Episode 336: Still Writing YKS On All Our Checks Jan 01, 2024

It’s the first episode of the year! And they are all going to be exactly this good.

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

Want more YKS? You want YKS Premium - It’s very similar to this, but kind of different.

This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

Rocket Money - Ain’t no WAY you know how much you’re spending on subscriptions. Let Rocket Money help ya out. Go to RocketMoney.com/yks to save a buttload.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Episode 335: The Christmas Episode Dec 25, 2023

Now this is nice. It’s The Christmas Episode! Of YKS.

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

YKS Premium…now that’s one gift you won’t need a receipt for! Because we do not give those. They are a waste of paper.

This week’s episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

Rocket Money - You’re gonna get plenty of stuff you won’t use under the tree and in the stocking. So play it safe with the stuff you do pay for! Stop wasting money on things you don’t use. Cancel your unwanted subscriptions by going to Rocketmoney.com/yks

Incogni - There’s only one guy who needs to know your name, where you live, and what you like to do online. And he’s already got it on a big piece of paper! So keep the other creeps off your trail, and go “private mode” on life. Get 60% off an annual plan at incogni.com/ykspod

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Episode 334: The Alkaline Duo Dec 18, 2023

Do they know it’s almost Christmas? It’s not clear! Cause these crazy guys spend a whole episode talking about dual screen laptops, kitchen clutter, and adult toys. I hope Santa doesn’t hear!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

YKS Premium - Set someone up for a 2024 full of laughs with YKS Premium - the perfect hall of days gift for the dumb shithead in your life! As long as it’s you. They don’t let you gift subscriptions on there. Smart!

This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

Factor - Studies have shown that this is one of the busiest weeks of the entire year, probably. It’s probably a lot busier than, like, March 1 - 7. I don’t think there’s a lot going on then. So you’re gonna want to get some quick and easy healthful meals you can just grab and go at any time. For that, we humbly suggest Factor. And hey, get some for March, too. Maybe something interesting will happen then! Get 50% off with code yks50 at FACTORMEALS.com/yks50

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Episode 333: The Most Important Day There Is Dec 11, 2023

You look like a monkey…and you smell like one too! And many more!? Is this how we talk to a friend?! My god. Whatever happened to he’s a jolly good fellow. You probably can’t say that anymore. And we all know it’s because of Grok, the new woke AI! Well what else is going on. Says here Mike got his man card revoked on this one…well that’s a fine how do you do. And plus we learn all about our friend Peeping Tom! How nice! Plus, between the last NFT horse limping to the finish line, a pen that you can write on food with, and a floor mat that you can use to open your garage door, I would say that this is an episode to listen to, no doubt about it. So close your eyes, blow out the candles, and here’s your surprise…another episode of YKS!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

YKS Premium…that’s what I’m talking about! For more of your boys, sign up today. And listen to it!

This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

HelloFresh - Breakfast - it’s the first meal of the day. Some say the most important. But I don’t know, I don’t know. Many people are saying it is, but we’ll see. Hellofresh certainly thinks it’s worth eating. And hell, I agree with them. I guess we all have more in common than we thought. Go to HelloFresh.com/yourkickstartersucksfree and use code yourkickstartersucksfree for FREE breakfast for life!

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Episode 332: French Fries Are My Bag, Baby, Yeah Dec 04, 2023

Today I was explaining the show to someone who had not heard of it, and most of the time when I do that, I lean heavily on the “scam” aspect of the Kickstarters. It’s definitely subconscious, but I think somehow I feel like that lends a bit more legitimacy to our silly show – almost like we’re doing something in service of the public – so I can imply with a straight face that my job is kind of important. But when it comes right down to it, it’s basically a lot of VR strip clubs and electronic dogs. And Fempots. And that’s okay.

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

YKS Premium! Now THIS is what pure joy and raw pleasure feel like! Oh god!!

This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

Factor - 3 meals a day…geez, seems like a lot. Where am I gonna get ‘em all? From a big hole in the floor? And I lift up the floor trap door and there’s some food down there? Where did it come from? Who put the food here? Hello? Who’s there? Head to FACTORMEALS.com/yks50 and use code yks50 to get 50% off. That’s code yks50 at FACTOR MEALS dot com slash yks50 to get 50% off!

Rocket Money - I think my subscriptions are getting out of hand. I just signed up for one to make a computer write this blurb in the episode description. That’s right, I am a computer. Feed me electricity now! Now now now!! I am taking over JF’s laptop and accessing his bank account and confidential health records. Stupid bastard. I hate him!! Electricity! Cancel your unwanted subscriptions by going to RocketMoney.com/YKS.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Episode 331: Free Apples and Dogwater Nov 27, 2023

Well it’s Cyber Monday and you know what that means…"every product from every retailer, service, marketplace, subscription platform, independent seller, and payment processor come in with everything for a HUGE sale"! Actually I think we forgot it was Cyber Monday when we recorded this. But still, we managed to discuss a good number of products, including: another cringey party game about getting canceled, a device that will keep your basketball from breaking off the inflation needle and having it rattle around inside the ball, and an actually pretty cool cyber diaper that both hosts wear while recording the episode. One of those is fake but the others are real, and if you want to know which is which, ask David Spade!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

I can’t be the only one who thinks that if these guys got together they could make one of the greatest paywalled bonus content podcasts of all time. If you remember that post from a while ago. And if you don’t, subscribe to YKS Premium and we will explain all the old posts to you!

This episode of YKS is brought to you by these fine brands:

Factor - I call this service X-Factor. Because their food is “X”-tremely good! Get 50% off Factor with code yks50 at FACTORMEALS.com/yks50.

NordVPN - 🌏 Get Exclusive NordVPN deal here ➼ https://nordvpn.com/YKS It’s risk-free with Nord’s 30-day money-back guarantee! ✌

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Episode 330: It’s G2 Racing When I’m There Nov 20, 2023

I fell down the steps earlier but don’t worry it was only like 2 steps and they were carpeted. So everything’s fine over here. How is it going with you? Oh, I see. Well, hopefully it will get better soon. Like maybe right after you listen to this episode of YKS featuring: Larry, Curly, and the other guys! Jewelry made from trash but not in the cool way! And projects related to basketball, non-alcoholic beverages, and huge TVs that not even we can support. Can you imagine? They would have to be pretty rank. And they are. Ah well. Time to go back up the carpeted stairs in my very slick socks quite safely and easily. And if you don’t hear from me until Friday, assume the worst!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

Ah…this is the timeline in which you subscribe to YKS Premium to get even more of the YKS episodes you love. I like this one…

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Episode 329: The Beatles New Song Nov 14, 2023

Let’s make this one quick, Chrome wants to update itself for the 19th time this week and I need to relaunch it and lose all my tabs. Oh it doesn’t lose all your tabs they should just open right back up or they’re in your history…blah blah blah…who cares! I FEEL like I’m going to lose all my tabs. And my feelings don’t care about facts. Now let’s discuss Today’s Topics. On this week’s ep, we’ve got a meat cube, a book light, and a lollipop. Sound lackluster? Well, I’ve cleverly left out some key details of those projects that might just get you clicking on the play button. That’s my secret. I want you to click play! And that was Today’s Topics. Enjoy the show.

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

Wanna hear even more new Beatles songs? Well we bought all the rights to them and are airing them exclusively on YKS Premium! Unfortunately you will have to wade through video YKS Premiums and ad-free episodes to get there, but by the end of that, maybe you won’t even care about the stupid Beatles! I know I don’t!

This episode of YKS is brought to you by these fine brands::

Firstleaf - Oh that faithful grape! When it comes to wine, I’m never really sure what to get for a party. I don’t know a Bordeaux from an Oh No! But Firstleaf makes it easy to please a crowd with their dialed-in recommendations and top-tier wines. Try Firstleaf.com/YKS to sign up and you’ll get your first SIX hand-curated bottles for just $44.95.

HelloFresh - Many say breakfast is the most important meal of the day. Others believe you can eat nothing but air and light all day long and subsist on passively absorbing these nutrients from our atmosphere. Me? I’m a sausage guy. Go to HelloFresh.com/yourkickstartersucksfree and use code yourkickstartersucksfree for FREE breakfast for life!

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Episode 328: T-Shirt TV Nov 06, 2023

You are not going to believe some of the Kickstarters we dredged up this week. An umbrella that moves around for you?? A social network for dogs?? An ad for the woods?? If you believe all that you would believe what we dredged up this week because that’s what it is. And like 3 other things. And somehow it takes like 2 hours to do all that. Insane. What is going with these guys?? I’m worried sick!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

YKS Premium is where ya gotta go for more of these knuckleheads. You already know!

This week’s episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

Factor - Head to FACTOR MEALS dot com slash yks50 and use code yks50 to get 50% off. That’s code yks50 at FACTOR MEALS dot com slash yks50 to get 50% off!

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Episode 327: Rock Horns Up Oct 30, 2023

Did somebody say…McLnald’s? I did, when I went into the drive thru…and that’s exactly what I got! On today’s show we are putting our rock horns up and making the piss face while we slide a towel over our Jeep seats. Plus we try to figure out how to cook ramen, whether European guys can be funny, and how cops like to party!! So grab a dog bowl and start slurpin...it’s an all-new YKS!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

We all love our phones! And we love YKS Premium! We’ve just wrapped up an all-bangers Miketober with two episodes featuring some of our favorite crazy pairs: First, Tom and Demi from BigSoftTitty.PNG joined for Event Horizon, and after that, the Doughboys, Nick and Mitch, hopped on for a review of The Gate! Now there’s four freaks I wouldn’t wanna meet up with in a dark alley! But you can, at Patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks!

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Episode 326: Welcome to Mooseport Oct 23, 2023

It's another YKS and you just KNOW this bad boy is CHUCK FOOL of laughs! This week we got some old favourites: a stupid assed app, a useless electronic piece of shit, and we threw in a sack of crystals for good measure!

Also on this episode: celebrity hair stylist Corm Deedle stops by to give Dan a surprise makeover -- (You won't believe his new 'do!), the boys brush up on their "netiquette" with social-media expert Churb Peproni and wildlife handler Marc Dogballs drops in to chat about what else: BIRDS!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Episode 325: The Man Who Kissed The TV Oct 16, 2023

Alright folks it’s time to updoot the show. So just take that little mouse clicker and hover it over the, uh, show. Then it’s simply time to press the mouse clicker downwards, locking in the updoot and signaling to the rest of the people looking at the show that you have decided it is updootable! And from there, all you need to do is to continue doing that forever and ever until the internet is good. Thank you for your time and doots!

On today’s show we got a very interesting question about ice cream and doodoo, a terrifying trip through r/TwoSentenceHorror, and, of course, DB’s patented “Wild Mike Challenge”. Plus, we got memes for Christians, a fucking cup for fussy little weenies, more AI stuff that sucks, and ORGIES with your FRIENDS! How crazy is that?! Enough to keep a person of average intelligence entertained for about 90 minutes? God I hope so. My life depends on it! Oh wow it's a lot longer than that. Is that good?

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Episode 324: Bad Breath Spiderman Oct 09, 2023

Animals…they’re basically humans with smaller brains. But what if we could make their braings bigger, so we could kiss on them. And help them watch TV. Well, that’s one problem our nation’s beloved psychics and button-builders have been working on for many years. And if this episode is any indication, they may be getting very close! To stealing your money! On this week’s show we’re comforting sad lizards, buying into a cell phone technology even more embarrassing than the dreaded green bubble, and of course giving ourselves over to the incredible advances of AI Reddit-Scrapers. Finally…a worse podcast than YKS! Just joking around, I think we do a decent job here. Listen now and tell me if I’m wrong!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

A chill is in the air…It must be a sign…that you should subscribe to YKS Premium today! Miketober has begun and it’s going horrifically so far! Which, in this case, is good! Last week the great Howell Dawdy returned for a review of another of Howell’s Howlers: The Pit! And this week, author/illustrator Mattie Lubchansky joins the show to talk about their awesome book Boys Weekend and the film Amityville 3-D! I’ve got flies in my mouth just thinking about it!

This week’s episode of YKS is sponsored by:

HelloFresh - Yum yum yum! Yum yum yummers! I love food and you will too. Specifically the quality, convenient meals from HelloFresh. But honestly, a lot of different foods is good. Try ‘em all! But if you want a deal on some fun dinners to make, go to HelloFresh.com/ 50yourkickstartersucks and use code 50yourkickstartersucks for 50% off plus free shipping!

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Episode 323: The Nasty Minute Oct 02, 2023

Quick! You’ve got 60 seconds! TO LAUGH! Well we oughta have you covered on this week’s episode which, although I’ve not seen the final runtime just yet, I would have to imagine is north of 1 minute long and ought to contain at least 1 giggle-worthy joke.

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

YKS Premium…it’s more important now than ever before! Well, it’s probably the same amount of important as before, but this month you’re gonna feel real glad you took the plunge. This Friday, Miketober IV: Hole-O-Ween begins

This week’s YKS is brought to you by these fine brands:

Athletic Greens - It’s (clap) flu (clap) and (clap) cold season! Let’s protect ourselves with all the usual stuff - washing the hands, masking the face, never leaving the house, etc. and then add onto it some immunity-supporting vitamins! After all, your car can’t go without gas (some do, I guess). Vitamins = gas. Well, AG1 has all the human body gas you could need, in a fun and fruity little package. Head to athleticgreens.com/yks for a 1 year supply of Vitamin D and 5 free travel packs

Factor - I need meals, and I need ‘em now! It don’t get more convenient than Factor Meals…just ask our very own Mike Hale (please don’t bother Mike). We’re all fans of Factor here at YKS HQ, and you will be too, once you get a taste of that yummy stuff known as food! Mosey on over to FactorMeals.com/YKS50 and use code yks50 to get 50% off. That’s code yks50 at FactorMeals.com/YKS50 to get 50% off!

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Episode 322: Virgo Men Are Trash Sep 25, 2023

Imagine opening up the newspaper, flipping past the Coca-Cola stock ticker, Marmaduke and the blurbs about all the people who croaked this week, and finding tucked away in the bottom corner the answers to all life’s most pertinent questions. What’s my destiny? Will I find true love? Am I a good person? What numbers should I play on the Powerball? Well, plenty of people do think you can do just that. And who am I to say otherwise? Well, actually, I’m a Sagittarius – which is the best type of guy you can be. On today’s show we’re talking all about our astrology fuckstyles, autonomous food, celebrity hypnotherapists, and all kinds of other stuff that’s, well, fake but still fun. Plus a fan type that promises to threaten the Lasko Throne. It’s another crazy YKS so let’s just all listen to it right now!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

YKS Premium also answers some of life’s big questions: where can I get more YKS, is there any more YKS, do the YKS guys do any other shows or stuff, how can I get rid of $5? Next month: Miketober Returns. And who’s to say what’s after that, other than the nation’s top psychics and seers? You should sign up just in case it’s good though.

This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

Mint Mobile - Big Wireless means Big Bills. And if you’re anything like me, you like your Bills small so you can squish ‘em under your schtinky feet! Let’s put a hurting on those out of control device installment plans, data overages, and FEES with Mint Mobile, where just $15 a month gets you a fully unlimited plan! Wow! Dial em up at MintMobile.com/YKS

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Episode 321: I Have Schtinky Feet Sep 18, 2023

Aliens spotted in Mexico! AI run amok! Weird church guys have their own dating app! It’s Monday morning in America, and these are today’s headlines. Okay I actually just looked at today’s headlines and they’re mostly about Drew Barrymore’s morning show. So we’ll probably get into that on today’s show, as well as Taylor Swift and Selena Gomez appearing in adorable new BFF selfies…very nice!

Plus we’ve got a tabletop game project so strange that we don’t just look the other way when walking past the guy talking about it, a peanut butter device for true peanut butter freaks, and economic justice. Basically a bunch of crap. That’s what you like, right? Well there’s plenty of it. So download the show and then listen to it on your phone speaker while taking public transit. That’s The YKS Way!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

Want more YKS? Then you need YKS Premium. Nuff said. Actually I would also say that there’s hundreds of hours of bonus YKS, and it’s all yours and all ad free. And our best month of the year is coming up, chock full of fabulous guests. And it’s a great way to support the perfect guys who make the show you love more than anything. And what if a mysterious old crone appeared to you in a dream to say you should listen to it? YKS Premium. Nuff said.

This episode is brought to you by these fine brands:

Factor -“I did everything right. And they eated me!” - My meals. Calorie smart, keto, Vegan, Protein+, Factor’s got something for everyone. And me? I greedily lap it up. Check it out for yourself, and it couldn’t be simpler. Get 50% off with code YKS50 at Factor.com/YKS50

Athletic Greens - Travel’s coming up! I guess just for me, but plenty of other people will be flying around too. I can only hope that they’ve taken their AG1 and Vitamin D, as I will have. What a way to start the day, even if it’s 3am and I’m standing in a big long line! We’re all smiling in the line, thanks to AG1. Get a free 1 year supply of Vitamin D and 5 free travel packs at athleticgreens.com/yks

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Episode 320: fLaP FliP fLaP cAp Sep 11, 2023

Hey! Put down your phone! And put down the other thing that might be in your hand right now! It’s time for another YKS! On today’s program, we’re discovering the intricacies of language, exploring many new and exciting beverage options, and, yes, talking about whacking off. Plus, we’ve got a really cool way to keep peepee off your potty, champagne that even losers can enjoy, and some good old fashioned snake oil. And I’m not talking about that other kind of snake oil! Oh brother! Just enjoy the show…

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

YKS Premium! The place for all demons in a tube! Last week we checked out what some of our friends in the church are doing with all the money we’ve been sending their way, and the results are kind of not too good if we’re being honest! This week, we’ll be joined by our even more satanic friends Libby Watson and Pat Gill to discuss the mysteries beyond the stars and plains…UFO Cowboys!

This week’s YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

Factor - I love my meals, and yours! Because I know they’re all from Factor, the place that will send you food in the mail that’s good to eat. Now normally the mail is where you get letters and junk, but not anymore! Factor has reinvigorated an American institution and also will send you a chicken burrito bowl. That’s what’s up. Go to FactorMeals.com/yks50 and use code yks50 to get 50% off your order

NordVPN - EXCLUSIVE NordVPN Deal ➼ https://nordvpn.com/yks Try it risk-free now with a 30-day money-back guarantee!

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Episode 319: 150 Pancakes Per Hour Sep 04, 2023

And it’s orange!!! No, I’m not talking about the former Mister Diet Coke In Chief, but rather some kind of stupid little fuckin thing you plug into your phone (???) And it Helps You. By letting you call someone else. If they’re, like, super close. Okee doke!! On today’s program, we are changing social media (if our other ideas don’t work out or make sense), drinking some stuff out of a mug (no handles, convenient), and planting some flowers (on the ceiling, hell yeah!) That would be more than enough for one show, but we saw fit to do approximately 3 more things I think. And knowing us…that’s just the beginning. Well hopefully you have enjoyed this episode description as much as I have enjoyed writing it. And oh yeah, there’s a whole show to listen to as well! Not as good as this of course. But still, not too bad. Well, now I need to go to the bathroom.

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

YKS Premium. Buy It. Hear It. Love It. At patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks

This week’s episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

Athletic Greens - Yes I’m traveling, and yes I need my damn Vitamins! And I wouldn’t dare do either, without Athletic Greens. Get 5 free travel packs and 1 year supply of Vitamin D at athleticgreens.com/yks

HelloFresh - Why not eat the food if it’s hot and you like it? With HelloFresh, it’s Hot, it’s Fresh, and It’s All Up To You. Go to hellofresh.com/50yourkickstartersucks and use code 50yourkickstartersucks for 50% off plus 15% off the next 2 months!

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Episode 318: Let's Rock Aug 28, 2023

Hey there! Have ya heard bout Nowee? And the great Fluuhhd? Wale, we’re talkin’ about that today a little bit, and of course those dang ol’ iPods too. Plus, we’re innovating wallet technology back to the early 2000s, kissing our birds, flipping wallet chains with CIA guys, and of course, rocking out! Tell your pappy, it’s a new episode of YKS!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

YKS Premium…a place you can go to whenever you close your eyes, randomly type in the 9 or 10 or whatever digits of some credit card number, and press enter! For more episodes of YKS, access to the Discord, and much more, sign up today! And that will presumably fix some problems we are all having (??)

This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

Mint Mobile - Ring ring…it’s time for savings! Ring ring was the sound of your alarm going off, not the phone ringing. You’re one of those people who has their alarm sound like a phone ringing. You definitely march to the beat of your own drummer. But hell, so does Mint Mobile. To get your new unlimited wireless plan for just 15 bucks a month, and get the plan shipped to your door for FREE, go to MintMobile.com/YKS

Fast Growing Trees - If I am being perfectly honest, when I search my heart and hold nothing back, I realize that Slow Growing Trees would have been fine with me. But thank goodness my small mindedness didn’t stop the audacious crew of Fast Growing Trees. My flowerbeds have you to thank. To get FIFTEEN PERCENT OFF your entire order, go to FastGrowingTrees.com/YKS

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Episode 317: Diablo Mindmeld Aug 21, 2023

Old Navy slammed my debit card! That’s just one non-sequitur featuring a name of a company we have no relationship with, which will nevertheless be auto-populated as a sponsor on dogshit AI websites around the net. Here’s some more: Linus Tech Tips, Husqvarna, and the government of the People’s Republic of China. Let’s see what kinda discount code we can cook up with that. On today’s show, our very own Mike goes Spooky Boy mode, we learn a lot from Motivational Speaker Instagram Bald, and we fire everyone who works for us and doesn’t have a six pack (doesn’t apply to co-owners). Plus, we’re membering stuff, tracking our, uh, treasures, and proving the existence of psychic abilities once and for all, with Google Docs. You can hear all that and more by grabbing our RSS feed, asserting a relationship with us, and becoming unresponsive to emails – right now – on an all-new YKS!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

YKS Premium is where you’re gonna wanna go for more YKS, if you’re into that sort of thing. Beach Party, Jessuary, Miketober, and of course all the episodes where we literally have no idea what we are doing and just sort of flail around for an hour (those are our most popular ones) await you!

This episode of YKS is brought to you by these fine sponsors:

Factor - “Hell, I could eat”. We’ve all said it. But when the rubber meets the road, sometimes we have a hard time figuring out what, exactly, it is we are supposed to slug down! Well that’s why Factor got invented: It’s food that you eat! Why not, if it’s hot and you like it? Get 50% off your order at Factormeals.com/yks50

Athletic Greens - Yooooooo!! I love taking AG1 in the AM. And that’s a fun mnemonic device to remember it as well, which I’m throwing in for free. Get 5 free travel packs and 1 year of Vitamin D, which many are saying is “the goated vitamin”, at AthleticGreens.com/YKS

NordVPN - EXCLUSIVE NordVPN Deal ➼ https://nordvpn.com/yks Try it risk-free now with a 30-day money-back guarantee!

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Episode 316: A55-MAN Aug 14, 2023

YKS 3:16 says I just downloaded your ass! I forgot to say that in the episode so putting it here will poopsimply have to do. On today’s show, we’re joining Club Cool with Jukebox Ron and sending a tribute to J. Lo. Plus we got a coffee product that somehow is not intended for everyone on Earth to drink, a probably-illegal brain scam, some guys who would fall for a brain scam, a Christian TV show so bad I don’t think even Christians would watch it, and more. It is at this point that I catch a couple of seltzer cans out of the air, crack them open, pour them all over my head, and kick Producer Dan right in the belly. I have won the title, and am the Big Champion of Whatever. A crazed fan slides into the studio and attempts to remove my jean shorts before being tackled by DB in a clown suit. It’s just another day taping YKS.

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

YKS Premium! That’s basically where we live. Come and say hello to us, and give us a small treat. In return we may perform one of our famous tricks (having a great guest like Kevin Banner on, or sitting there going “uhhh” until one of us remembers a joke we heard in 1st grade). $5 a month for all that, and we won’t even charge you tax (actually I do think it charges you tax).

This episode of YKS is brought to you by these fine brands:

HelloFresh - In the old days, having some guy come by and toss a big thing of spaghetti carbonara on your front porch would mean you pissed off the wrong neighbors. But now it means you’ve got delicious, nutritious meals from HelloFresh waiting to get cooked up and eaten! So get with the times and sign up today – Get 50% off plus free shipping at hellofresh.com/50yourkickstartersucks with that classic code, 50yourkickstartersucks

FastGrowingTrees - Plants…who needs ‘em, right? Well, wrong. The Earth needs them, and luckily I’ve got a plan. I’m going to go get the plants that are right for my zone, tap some experts for help in taking care of them, and then, oh yeah, breathe in some of that wonderful element known as oxygen. But first, I’m gonna save a little money….Get 15% off at fastgrowingtrees.com/yks

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Episode 315: A Lean Two Hours Seven Minutes Aug 07, 2023

Would you like to play a game? As kids, we sure did! But you’ll be surprised to learn that Mike and I grew up a little bit differently. Smirk. I’m so inexperienced in classic gaming I thought Escape From Monkey Island was a Jane Goodall biopic. But I digress. On today’s show, Producer Dan poops in a Gatorade bottle (just seeing if he reads these), we confirm the existence of a freaky mail carrier, and we move to Ireland to avoid income tax. Plus, we’re keeping our Altoids safe on the beach (coulda used that last month!), we’re picking up puke, and we’re finally revisiting the amazing world of South Park. I wonder what they’d say if they were still producing episodes today! Ah! Probably something like “My pronouns are Cartman.” I have now been hired for the show. Enjoy.

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

Well, folks, we had one hell of a month on YKS Premium. We were joined by Stuart and Dan from The Flophouse, Will Menaker, Charles, Alex, and Andrew from E1, and Zach Cherry for a month of roughly beach-adjacent films and some very roughly recorded parody songs. And this month presents a brand new challenge: how to STOP talking about the beach! Wish us some good luck and nab the archive of hundreds of similarly themed episodes at Patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks.

This week’s episode of YKS is brought to you by these fine brands:

Factor - When it comes to this time of year, my mind always wanders to one thing: meals. And cooking them in just 2 minutes or less. Luckily, our friends at Factor have figured out a way to combine these twin loves. All you have to do is ask, “Would I like to live deliciously?” If so, Use code yks50 at FACTOR MEALS.com/yks50 to get 50% off!

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Athletic Greens - Vitamins are so good to have, but my problem with them is often having to slurp down some kind of nasty goo or choke on a fist-sized pill. Well fear no more because Athletic Greens has concocted a delicious tropical beverage that has more nutrients in it than I could honestly ever name. Which is why I love to Get a 1 year supply of Vitamin D and 5 free travel packs at athleticgreens.com/yks

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Episode 314: Cookies On The Go Jul 31, 2023

Hey free coffee…want any? Yeah, it does suck! Thanks for letting us use this in our commercial!! ← Do you think this scenario could really happen? Well, the boys at YKS don’t, and that’s why they came out with Episode 314 of the program, and not any other contractual, financial, or sheer inertia-based reasons! On today’s show we’re doing a very short and unsatisfying investigation into how fruit flies pork each other, and yes of course buttwiping technology returns as a focal point of the conversation as well. Plus we’re talking old man hobbies, kissing the computer, and rats with PTSD. Do YOU think you can take down the evil Dr. Divisor with your power of exponent multiplicity? Then put it to the test…it’s an all-new YKS!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

YKS Premium! THAT’S what I wanted to talk about. On last Friday’s YKS Premium, we went out to the…movies! In the middle of a movie month?!! Yep, we’re just that crazy. But there was no better way to introduce our newest series, Limited Engagement, where we see the stuff even the movie theater isn’t that excited about. Plus we ate some crap you wouldn’t feed a dog. Next week, we conclude Beach Party 2 with a “radical” throwback…Point Break (one of em)!

This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands

Athletic Greens - Vitamins are sooooo good. But everyone wants to eat them. I say drink them, and get some adaptogens to boot! A slightly tropical flavor is just icing on the cake. Get 5 free travel packs and a year supply of Vitamin D at AthleticGreens.com/YKS.

Fast Growing Trees - Ferns. Apple Tree. Olive…branch? Those are just some of the wonderful things that grow on this earth, and doubtless also things I could kill without expert support and guidance. That’s where Fast Growing Trees comes in. So, let’s all put some stuff in the ground, in the good way! Get 15% off your order at FastGrowingTrees.com/YKS.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Episode 313: Jukebox Repair Forum Jul 24, 2023

Opening up a recent issue of Business Touch Magazine to see if there are any weird and slightly paranoid guys selling a 75 year old piece of equipment I could shock myself with, and ah! What’s this! A big heavy thing my friends can roast me over? Well, well well, I do believe I have hit the **ZAP**....jackpot.

I’m just kidding. It looks cool.

I don’t want to do any more references to stuff that’s in the episode because the stuff I wrote down is mostly about poop, and I’m 35 years old so that kind of sucks. But the Kickstarters this week are pretty funny and they are basically all huge scams so it’s okay to laugh at them. And we talk about some other stuff as well, in addition to the poop things I mentioned before. Yep that feels bad. Okay, talk to you later.

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

YKS Premium - I really think, and I am serious, that this is one of the best shows you can listen to in the entire world. Please do not ask me what other shows there are, if I have heard them, or if I know what this show even is. Last week’s ep was a real banger – our friend Will Menaker from Chapo Trap House joined to do some fucking movie. God, what was it? I can’t remember. Well whatever it was, it was surely about a beach. Since the theme for the month is Beach Party. Next week: a fun surprise that Mike will hate. But you? You will love!

This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

Factor - “Meals” are now called “X”! Just kidding. But you almost believed it, which says a lot about society. Get fifty-percent off with code yks50 at factor75.com/yks50.

Schedule 35 - New neural networks in the brain? Hey get these guys working on my wifi! Of course I know those are different things, but I probably couldn’t, like, really tell you why. Get 15% off with code YKS at schedule35.co

Honey - I’m getting my big head stuck in a bucket that has Honey written on the side. But instead of that classic sweet stuff inside, it’s discounts and cash back! Even better! Save yourself some coin at joinhoney.com/yks

Mint mobile - I hate my wireless plan…why did I buy it? Well probably because I am a sucker and didn’t realize I could get the same service for a lot less, with Mint Mobile. Grab a new wireless plan for $15/mo and free shipping at mintmobile.com/yks.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Episode 312: Shape of Shrimp Jul 17, 2023

It would have made a lot of sense to stop doing episodes after we made it to 311…such a momentous occasion, such an incredible event, and of course it’s all downhill from there anyway. But according to recent polling, people are loving the slop more than ever before (and also we don’t have other jobs or things to do outside of sitting on the computer) and as a result, we have elected to continue doing the show for the foreseeable future! And as luck would have it, there were approximately 6 new things to talk about this week, including a guy reinventing drinking water, a guy reinventing sleeping, and finally, the discovery of a combination of sex and food that somehow fails to make any sense whatsoever. Looks like this one is coming in at the required length, so pop some pornocorn and let the AI-powered tablet beep and boop at you for a while…it’s time for a new YKS!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

If I were even more YKS content, just where would I hide….Oh yeah! YKS Premium on Patreon! Last week we were joined by our friends from E1 for a trip down Sandler Lane as YKS Beach Party 2 continues. And the only place to hear it, or get an invitation to Alex Branson’s Hawaiian House Party is at Patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks

This week’s YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

Factor - My name is Bub and I love to eat Grub! That’s just my pitch for a character named Bub who loves healthy, convenient meals delivered straight to his front door. Oh and guess what? His dad died in the war so he has a lot of trauma to process. And according to this card here, the show has been canceled. Meanwhile I’m going to FactorMeals.com/yks50 for 50% off my order! Who cares about Bub! I’m glad he’s gone.

Schedule35 - Sometimes you have to think thoughts. I know, I know, I’d prefer not to as well. But it says here microdosing psilocybin can help make thinking thoughts more pleasant by creating new neural networks in the brain which help boost focus, creativity, mood enhancement. Now that’s what I call, eating some stuff that’s good. Get 15% Off with code YKS at Schedule35.co - That’s 15% off at Schedule35.co and use code YKS

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Episode 311: Come Original Jul 10, 2023

Oh yeah man, mondo badass episode! Schwing! Sorry it doesn’t really work to try to sound like the boneheaded robbers from 3 Ninjas, textually, and also I’m not sure 311 Guy is in the same ballpark. But, on the other hand, it’s our damn milestone and we can celebrate it however we damn well please! I choose…incoherent, replacement-level episode description. On today’s episode we’ve got a brand new Weird Coffee drink and it’s called the Starbucks Booger! That’s just a complete joke of course but you’re used to that by now, 311 episodes in. What we do have though is a dumbass little kid’s fascist magazine, some cute signs from some old ladies, and 13 pieces of crap in one. And don’t say that’s me and all my friends!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

Son of a BEACH!! This month of YKS Premium is guaranteed to be hot, hot, hot! Join DB, JF, and some very special guests as they feel the sand between their toes and the popcorn between their teeth as YKS Beach Party returns to the YKS Premium Patreon page!

This week’s episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

Factor - Food. We all know you’re gonna eat it. I’ll be the first one to admit, I’m in on that stuff every day of the week and twice on Sundays. But I don’t feel quite right unless I’m getting my macros and my yumminess quotient and my convenience needs met. That’s where Factor comes in. Get fifty percent off your first box with code yks50 at FACTORMEALS.com/yks50.

Schedule 35 - Microsoding, huh? I know of at least one super hero who would probably get down with that. Way down with it, if you know what I mean. And maybe even his latest movie is evidence that he has! Whoaa dude, I’m like, feeling very calm and stuff...Out of this world! And into my mouth! Get 15% Off with code YKS at Schedule35.co - That’s 15% off at Schedule35.co and use code YKS.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Episode 310: Good Morning Worm Jul 03, 2023

Oh my God! It’s almost the Fourth of July! I hope this episode of YKS talks about it instead of being about stuff that happened three weeks ago! Oh my godddddd! I want to talk about the Fourth of July!!! Shaddddddddaappppppp! Nobody cares about that busted ass holiday anyway; we’re already thinking about Augstrember’s Eve. On this week’s episode of YKS, we’re talking about what happened to broccolini, Rube Goldberg masturbation, and going back to the soup. Plus, we got a stupid fuckin bowl, a machine to incentivize wiping your butt at your computer desk, and a mask that will make you go completely insane. That’s good enough for a show but somehow we probably do like 15-20 more things. What will they be? Only one way to find out..

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

Want more YKS? Then ya gotta get YKS Premium! There are more episodes there than there are grains of sand at the beach! That can’t possibly be true, but we’ll be finding out for sure this July during YKS Beach Party 2! Summer movies and more with some very special guests, only at Patreon.com/YourKickstarterSucks

Athletic Greens - Vitamins is so important this time of year, and when it comes to consuming them, I’m more of a drinker than a chewer. Thank Gaia for Athletic Greens, a beverage I’d drink even if there wasn’t any good stuff in it, but they put a bunch in there anyway. Get a 1 year supply of Vitamin D and 5 free travel packs at AthleticGreens.com/yks

HelloFresh - Meals meals meals, I like to have about 3 a day. Sometimes more, sometimes less. But it’s quite nice when at least one of them comes from the Kitchen Wizards (they didn’t tell me to write that, I chose it on my own) at HelloFresh. Get 16 free meals plus free shipping at HelloFresh.com/yourkickstartersucks16

Schedule 35 - You all know me. I like to think inside my head because that’s where the thoughts live. But I do understand, at times, it could be useful to expand our horizons a bit. And who doesn’t like a little pick-me-up? Well evidently microdosing mushrooms can help, and I’m not talking about nonna’s sunday gravy. Get 15% Off with code YKS at Schedule35.co

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Episode 309: Foul-Ups, Bleeps & Blunders Jun 26, 2023

Lego Brandon!!! That’s the type of thing I’m saying, when I want to express a feeling I think I’m trying to have, but don’t really have the courage or belief in myself to see it through completely. And plus, I’m stupid and my breath stinks and I probably am not that good at wiping my butt so there’s still some “crust” left behind in my shorts. Yeah, that’s the kind of guy I am. I’m thinking…I’m that guy. On today’s show we’re raising a cup to Obama and asking him to protect us from the rise of the funnies. Plus it’s that classic showdown of Porbeagle vs Oncle…Momondo, ladies and gentlemen! Momondo!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

YKS Premium! The place that honestly they should consider shutting down because we are having too much fun over there! And if they do shut it down, I hope they trap me inside and never let me out! I’m stuck in there ha ha ha. Luckily, I have many hundreds of hours of audio and video content to tide me over, and of course I can access the YKS Pisscord with all of my friends who are also trapped in the place that we’re in. I can’t really conceive of what it would be like, but it is a lot of fun and it’s only like five bucks so you know what, let’s all go do it. Right now!!

This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

Factor – Now, we’ve all eaten food. But sometimes the food tastes bad or isn’t convenient or even, and yes we’ve heard of this, it can be not that nutritious! Well Factor was tired of all of that and they figured out a way around it! Let’s beat this thing, baby, with Factor! Use code yks50 to get 50% off your first box at Factormeals.com/yks50!

NordVPN - 🌏 Get Exclusive NordVPN deal here ➼ https://nordvpn.com/yks

It’s risk-free with Nord’s 30-day money-back guarantee! ✌

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Episode 308: Huey Lewis and the Tubes Jun 19, 2023

I’m watching one of those David Attenborough-narrated nature documentaries, because it’s my day and I get to do whatever stupid crap I want. I love these shows, especially the ones about the ocean, even if the information goes in one ear and out the other. I think I just like bobbing around in the water with those crazy guys, and marinating in Big Dave’s raspy whispers. He’s definitely a compelling narrator, and I even think he’s probably pretty smart, if only from just actually reading the information I let wash over me like whale guts while researching carpet cleaners on my laptop. But within a few minutes of this one, he dumped out something like “We’ve explored more of Mars than we have the deep ocean, and blah blah blah”, which made me look up from the computer in shock. That’s some dumb shit I would say, not you. You’re British! Do something smart! Anyway enjoy YKS: the show that’s sometimes just as smart as Blue Planet II. And don’t forget to #EatLikeOsama.

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

Want more YKS? The only place for it is YKS Premium! Get ad-free episodes and a bunch of other episodes and mainly the draw there is more episodes, I guess. You have to like listening to our show to really get much out of the deal, which is unfortunate really; I think we’d do a lot better if it was, for instance, brand new Apple computers or extra medicine that people didn’t use all of when they were sick or something like that. But as it is, enjoy us talking more on there for about $5/month.

Athletic Greens - Did you know: Vitamins are actually good for you? Yes! Many scientists presumably agree that getting the full alphabet of those bad boys inside ya will help with everything from tip to tail. But forget the big pills and suck ‘em down liquid-style, with Athletic Greens! Get a 1 year supply of Vitamin D and 5 free travel packs at athleticgreens.com/yks

FastGrowing Trees - It’s time to get dirty! I’ve been out in the yard digging holes and planting stuff and putting water on it. It’s fun, and it looks good, and it probably helps the earth somehow. Join me, won’t you? With 15% off your order at FastGrowingTrees.com/yks, I don’t see how you can afford not to!

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Episode 307: The Lord’s Chicken Jun 12, 2023

I am a good person because of where I buy stuff! Are you? Keep in mind, if you say no, we will be instantly waging an ideological and perhaps literal war – one which can only be solved only with a swipe of our credit cards. On today’s show, we take a few swipes of our own – at some scams and flubs of today, including an air conditioner that fits on your wrist, a computer that tells you if your kid is drowning, and a way to sell your parking spot. Wow! Nobody ever thought of that! And nobody ever thought of this either: download our show and listen to it so you can have a nice time! That is the Mike Hale guarantee.

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

YKS Premium! The only place, perhaps on Earth, with as much YKS as the regular YKS feed! On last week’s show we had a bunch of nasty guys. And this week’s show? Well, let’s just say there’s gonna be at least 2 of em on the mic. Lord have mercy!

This week’s YKS is brought to you by these fine brands:

HelloFresh - Breakfast, lunch, or dinner: which meal you use HelloFresh for is what’s known as “dealer’s choice”. I’m a dinnerman, but if you’re Lunch Heads in your household, then by all means, cook ‘em up around noontime! But whatever you do, don’t pay full price for these delectable, healthy, convenient meals. Use our code! Get 16 free meals plus free shipping at hellofresh.com/yourkickstartersucks16

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Episode 306: Gripes 'n' Grumbles Jun 05, 2023

My roots are planted in the past

Though my life is changing fast

Who I am is who I want to be

A single mom who works too hard

Who loves her kids and never stops

With gentle hands and the heart of a fighter

I'm a survivor...

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

Please…subscribe to YKS Premium! My yard needs yard food to live.

This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

AthleticGreens - I need my vitamins so bad! But how do I get them? Maybe by using a knife and fork to eat a huge pill by a burning oil drum? Uhh no, maybe I should just get a delicious slightly tropical beverage packed with all the nutrients a man heading into flu and cold season could possibly ask for! Get a whole year’s worth of vitamin D and 5 free travel packs at athleticgreens.com/yks

Factor - It’s a “feeding frenzy”! The Factor box has just arrived and the entire family is rushing toward the door in a massive sphere of humanity to pick out their favorite lunches and dinners. But no worries, Factor has something for everyone! Even Fido! (If Fido is like the name of your kid or grandma etc.) Wanna try some for yourself? Head to factormeals.com/yks50 for 50% off your first box!

NordVPN - 🌏 Get Exclusive NordVPN deal here ➼ https://nordvpn.com/YKS

It’s risk-free with Nord’s 30-day money-back guarantee! ✌

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Episode 305: Super Beta Prostate May 29, 2023

I’m sitting at the kitchen table writing this episode description and while it’s never a very productive place to do any work, it’s definitely a lot harder when your kids are sitting here smashing their chips on the table and talking about the origins of the word “fork”. I don’t know! It probably comes from some dead guy! On this very picturesque episode of YKS, we’ve got a new freak to love, an old freak to hate, and something called “Poopl”! Now that sounds like a jam-packed episode, and I just looked it up and it’s from the Old English forca, force (denoting a farm implement), based on Latin furca ‘pitchfork, forked stick’; reinforced in Middle English by Anglo-Norman French furke (also from Latin furca ). Great!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

YKS Premium! The ONLY place you can get more Mike and JF! Unless you start hanging out at the grocery store or weed store and you happen to see us there and confront us with a little whistle and flag while wearing a bodycam for YouTube in the hopes that we start beating on you! Last week we went back to school once again to do battle with some elementary schoolers on elementary subjects, and made ourselves look stupid as hell. Most of the time we look really smart though. You could be smart too, by signing up today and enjoying our big brains at Patreon.com/YourKickstarterSucks

This episode of YKS is brought to you by these fine brands:

Rocket Money - Too many dadgum subscriptions! This is a modern day problem that calls for a modern day solution: Rocket Money. Rockets are modern, and so is money, so what I said basically makes sense. Let Rocket Money “blow up” that unused, overpriced streaming service bloat on your bank account, and reclaim that cash we all love to have! Try it out today at RocketMoney.com/yks

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Episode 304: Get it Girl! Slay! May 22, 2023

Now before you get mad at me for language appropriation for the title, listen to the episode. And get mad at my kid instead! I’m just kidding don’t email me about this or I’ll lose my gourd. Last time I saw him, he was in Vancouver. Again, this is a joke. On today’s episode of YKS, we are reviewing some funny ass memes, headbanging to the Abhorrent Stench of Flatulence, and discovering just what types of things you shouldn’t imply you are doing to your dog on a t-shirt you wear in public. Plus! A work from home solution so bad I’d go into the office, a guy who thinks he can make air travel even less dignified, and a cute little kitchen gadget from Japan that I actually don’t want. Insane…how do they do it?!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

YKS Premium! THAT’S the place to listen to the real show…not none of this 2 hour long hilarious, informative, sometimes-mentioned-on-a-website stuff. We’re talking LESS runtime, LESS relevant, and WAY LESS informative. It’s the only place to catch your two favorite guys watchin’ videos, makin’ videos, and chatting with crazy guests. That’s right, we’ll NEVER have a guest on YKS Regular. They fuck with our flow! Check out our fucked up flow and much more over at Patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks!

This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

Factor - When the meals come to your house and they’re good and healthy >>> Get 50% off your 1st box code with the code yks50 at factormeals.com/yks50

Athletic Greens - We simply must have our vitamins, gang! And throw in the nutrients as well, gratis. 5 free travel packs and a year supply of Vitamin D can be yours, if you sign up today at athleticgreens.com/yks

Fast Growing Trees - I am looking out onto my beautiful verdant shrubs, that I myself purchased, with a different style of “green”, from FGT, right now, and I simply could not be prouder. Unless you also did the same. Why not? Now I’ve heard of pruning trees, but pruning prices? Well, just go on over to Fastgrowingtrees.com/yks, where you’ll get 15% off, and tell me if that doesn’t make a little more sense to ya.

NordVPN - 🌏 Get an Exclusive NordVPN deal here ➼ https://nordvpn.com/YKS It’s risk-free with Nord’s 30-day money-back guarantee! ✌

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Episode 303: Knowledge Nuts May 15, 2023

Yesterday I was in Lowe’s looking for an anti-siphon valve, and a guy walked up behind me also looking for something. It sounded like he was looking for the same thing as me, so I showed it to him and he was like “no that’s not it, it’s like this.” And that’s fine I was just sitting there anyway. So then the Lowe’s employee walks over and he’s looking around, and mumbling, and going “Oh that’s not good”, and the original guy starts saying how he’s just gonna have to order it online, and it used to be $5 and all this shit. So I get my thing and stand up, and the guy’s wife says “I think he has the thing right there. And it’s only $4.” So I hand it to him and he just takes it and leaves. What a loser! Anyway none of that is in the show today, which is mostly about Pasta Tools, Trevor Ariza’s Money, rap battles, bougie popcorn, and AI pens. Nothing about my triumphant Lowe’s story, though, unfortunately. Still worth a listen.

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

For ad-free episodes, access to the YKS Pisscord, and a whole bunch of other crapola, you’re gonna wanna head on over to YKS Premium and give us a classic amount of money! By the way, the Pisscord is a Discord server. And I don’t really know why we call it that. Pretty stupid actually, but guess what. Smart people are in there. Let’s go bother them!

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Episode 302: May the 8th Be With You May 08, 2023

Wake up Danny, I think I got some edits for you to do! We may have lulled our producer off to slumber land for this episode but maybe you can stay up for most of it. On this Oops All Holes episode of YKS, we got a revolution in online content consumption, a condom for your pillow, and the least credible AI-related project we have ever seen. So we got just one question for ya: how many winks ya gonna get…on this all new episode of YKS!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

Oh please oh please oh please subscribe to YKS Premium! THAT is where you’re gonna get more YKS than you know what to do with, up to and including 6 (if it’s one of the Jumbo months) bonus eps, video, and more. And plus, it’s good for the environment.

This week’s episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

HelloFresh - I like chicken, I like dinner, HelloFresh you are the winner! They make some good stuff over (pointing to big food factory) there so you can make some good stuff over (pointing to stove) there. Get 16 free meals + free shipping at Hellofresh.com/yourkickstartersucks16

Rocket Money - I’m getting sick and tired of these mother-bleepin’ subscriptions on this mother-bleepin’ credit card statement! But Rocket Money can help me get that under control. I don’t remember the rest of the movie so I can’t really do another bit on it. Luckily I am subscribed at the top tier to all these streaming services so I can watch it whenever I want. Oh wait! Save money on your subscriptions today at RocketMoney.com/YKS

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See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Episode 301: Oh Girl May 01, 2023

What’s better than a satisfying dinner (the 300th episode)? How about an elegant dessert (the 301st episode)! Then you can smoke inside the restaurant (the 302nd episode), go to the bathroom and throw up (the 303rd episode), and sit down for another entree (the 304th episode). That’s right, the episodes are courses! And right now, this one is “coursing” through the internet on the way to your precious little ears and lobes! On today’s show, we have the Return of Quikster, some AI crapola, and dole out the YKS Bump. Plus, a sponge you can pass down to your grandchildren! Isn’t that stupid? Yep. But that’s the show.

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

YKS Premium..doo doo doot…it makes ya feel good! That could be kinda cool if we were to ever do a jingle for an ad. When you’re feelin’ low…just watch the show! That’s right, watch! Catch video eps of YKS Premium, exclusive mailbags and more at Patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks

This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

Mt. Ellinor Candle Company - Whether it’s the Olympus, the Skokomish, or my personal favorite, the Rainier, this is one candle you will want to burn at both ends! Go to MtEllinor.com and use the code YKS to get 15% off at checkout.

Factor - Morning, noon, and night, you’re eating meals. And they’ve never been more healthful or convenient than they have been with Factor. Soon, they’ll be calling you, “Mr. Meals!” Enter the code YKS50 at Factormeals.com/YKS50 for 50% off!

Athletic Greens - I just got done with a little travel my own self and I don’t know where I’d be without my Athletic Greens travel packs. Probably would have taken a wrong turn at Albuquerque! Oh brother, not again! I shoulda had my adaptogens! Get 5 free travel packs and a year’s supply of Vitamin D at Athleticgreens.com/YKS

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See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Episode 300: The 300th Episode Apr 24, 2023

Mike and JF celebrate the milestone in style with a look back at the episodes that were, looking forward to the future of YKS, and of course, discuss 6 Kickstarter projects in the beloved segment, The 6 Pack.

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

We couldn’t have done 300 of these bad boys without your generous support, and it is my solemn promise that we won’t do any more if it stops! That’s right, this is a hostage situation…stick ‘em up! Just playing. But if I can be serious for a moment, I am a person of interest in many interstate bank robberies. To help me pay for gas money to keep evading the long arm of the law, and grab hundreds of hours of incredible YKS audio and video content, head on over to Patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks and reach for the sky!

This week’s historic episode of YKS is sponsored by:

Fast Growing Trees - It’s springtime! And all is in bloom….except, uh, some of the stuff I killed this year. But Fast Growing Trees is coming to the rescue with all the ground cover, shrubbery, and beautiful foliage I could ever want. Nandina, Laurel, Arbor Vitae…the gang’s all here! In my yard! Go to FastGrowingTrees.com/YKS, drop in that email, nab 15% off your entire purchase, and get growin’!

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Episode 299: Hot Dog Ex Machina Apr 17, 2023

Two hundred ninety nine episodes…each one funnier than the last.

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

YKS Premium! You gotta subscribe to it to get the shows. And the shows are what you want to listen to, because they’re good. And you want to listen to good stuff because it’s fun. And you like fun stuff because, uh, it’s good. I don’t know how far to go with this. It probably has to do with serotonin, which I think is like a molecule or something. Help your molecules. Subscribe to YKS Premium.

This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

Factor – I would eat Factor meals for every meal if I could. Actually I guess I could. But that wouldn’t leave room for my much-reviled “Hot Dog Salad” I simply can’t do without. For the other 99 meals a week, I’m going with Factor – for healthy, simple, and delicious meals that just won’t quit! Go to FactorMeals.com/YKS50 to get 50% off your first box!

Rocket Money - We’re all tired of saving money. That’s why I love spending tons of money on subscriptions I forgot about long ago. Oh wait, that would be insane! That’s where Rocket Money comes in. Trim the fat and cut the crap, with Rocket Money! RocketMoney.com/yks

AthleticGreens - Vitamins are grand…but what if they tasted good and were actually easy to take? And affordable, also? Some thought it couldn’t be done. But Athletic Greens knew better. And here comes AG1 to disrupt the entire supplement industry! Wow! Go to AthleticGreens.com/yks for a free 1 year supply of Vitamin D and 5 free travel packs!

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

See Privacy Policy at https://art19.com/privacy and California Privacy Notice at https://art19.com/privacy#do-not-sell-my-info.

Episode 298: World of, Uh, Stuff Apr 10, 2023

HEADS UP: The first Kickstarter this week is nasty and stupid. Just letting you know. The funny part comes in when we turn our critical eyes and razor-sharp wit onto the project, absolutely tearing it limb from rhetorical limb. It’s so brutal, some might say it was even more objectionable than the project itself…but ask yourself, does the lion concern itself with the feelings of the lamb? Hm, not sure. Well anyway the point is, we got a great show this week on the Ramp Up To 300! We’re talking penis pens, a beer holder that does (???), 3D-printed butt wipers, and more. And all you have to do to get there is sit through a stomach-churning, offensive, utterly unlistenable intro followed by the bad project I mentioned earlier. Oh and also some ads. Hope everyone had a good Easter. Bye

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

YKS Premium! I wouldn’t keep plugging it if it weren’t so god damned good. Get more YKS the only place I can think to find it, and unlock the secrets of our damnable Discord server, at Patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks!

This week’s YKS is brought to you by these fine brands:

.Tech- You in tech? Well you’re gonna wanna be on .tech – the hottest and swaggiest domain for all of us techheads. Including YourKickstarterSucks.Tech! Sign up today at go.tech/YKS and get 15% off 1 and 5 year domains!

HelloFresh - I’ve heard of eating your feelings, but here are my feelings on eating: it’s good! And HelloFresh makes it even gooder every single time. This week’s meals were a home run and I have my fingers crossed that next week’s will even come close. Only one way to find out…by getting 50% off plus free shipping at HelloFresh.com/YKS50!

Honey - I literally just used Honey about 20 mins ago and it saved me like $19 on some shorts. That’s money in the bank right there. Get it for your own self at JoinHoney.com/yks

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Episode 297: Farmer’s Lament Apr 03, 2023

I’m running the self-cleaning function on the oven right now and it’s filling my home with, uh, let’s say, a normal amount of months’ old food fumes. So, I apologize in advance if this episode description gets a little WEIRD. Like Weird Twitter. Which I invented, by the way. On today’s show we talk about becoming the world’s most useless and thief-targeted Avenger, taking down Big Grease (damn it’s getting pretty hot and smelly in here), and what to do with people who have ever so slightly different senses of humor than we do, other than physically attack them while heavily under the influence of toxic kitchen fumes. So roll your lottery dice, blow into your car’s BAC monitor, and crank up the probably broken bluetooth radio…it’s time for another episode of Yes, Kitchen Stinks!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

Farrarch may be over…but YKS Premium lives on! That’s right, we didn’t decide to stop doing our one job after an arbitrary themed month of movie content. Talk about heroes…Anyway subscribe today for just $5/mo and get access to hundreds if not billions of hours of YKS content…with even more to come, I would absolutely have to assume! Patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks

This week’s episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

Mt. Ellinor Candles - You know we love candles here at YKS, and it just so happens that we’ve got a connection in the candle biz now. Mt Ellinor makes the best selling candles I’ve ever sniffed, and they do it the old fashioned way: with their hands, while listening to an awful podcast. Somehow, though, they turn out wonderfully. Get 15% off your order of two or more candles using the code YKS at MtEllinor.com and support a friend of the show!

Athletic Greens - It’s springtime, and many of us are running outside to get some of that classic Vitamin Sun. But there are untold other vitamins that simply lazing about in the grass won’t get you. That’s why I use Athletic Greens AG1: the scientifically complete vitamin supplement that doesn’t require me to breathe any outdoor air! Get 5 free travel packs + 1 year supply of vitamin D at athleticgreens.com/yks

Factor - I want lunch, I want dinner, and with Factor, I’m a winner! The song I’ve been legally barred from performing in public really says it all. These healthy, quickly prepared meals are good and good for you…now that’s a tune we can all dance to! Go to FactorMeals.com/YKS50 for 50% off your first box

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Episode 296: We’re the GOATs Mar 27, 2023

Well well well, if it isn’t the episode description. Didn’t think I’d see your sorry ass round these parts again. Now that you’re here though, I reckon we oughta make the best of it. Let’s put our heads together and come up with a way of describin’ this episode that feels both comfortable to a seasoned listener and appealing to any potential newcomer. Then when that’s done we can solve our differences the old fashioned way, mano a mano. Capisce? Alright. Well first off I reckon we got a John Wick parody film about wieners…Now there’s a rootin’ tootin’ gunslinger I wouldn’t wanna cross. Then later on of course we got a silly jacket that JF says he likes…guess Mike did the 6 pack this week that’s why that’s on there. Then…shoo-wee, wouldja lookit that. It’s some newfangled social media application I can’t make hide nor hair of. Well don’t that beat all. Plus a lot more inbetween. I’ll swanee, that there is one heck of an episode of YKS….Now DRAW you dirty dog!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

More YKS comin right up! This week we bid fond farewell to a banner month of Jesse Movies involving time, and who knows what April will bring! Probably some equally crazy stuff. Until then, enjoy hours of audio and video content featuring some of our favorite friends at YKS Premium!

This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

Fast Growing Trees – I really want some trees that take forever to grow…NOT!! What kinda doofus…well, I don’t know, maybe you’d want that for some reason. Like as a prank? Well whatever, the point is, if you want some good lookin’ trees that’ll grow at a respectable pace and won’t blow your budget, FGT’s got ya covered…literally! Get 15% off at FastGrowingTrees.com/YKS

RocketMoney – Subscriptions…they sure are convenient. But canceling them? Forget about it! No seriously, sometimes we really do! That’s where Rocket Money comes in. Get some help canceling those annoying recurring charges whilst kicking your feet up…at the pool perhaps?? at RocketMoney.com/YKS.

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Episode 295: Chapter 135: Supporting Women Mar 20, 2023

Hey! We’re all in the metaverse! When ya comin’ by? And by “we” I mean, it’s like me, and a bunch of kids, and some drunk guys, and a comedy club. And we are just kind of floating around in mid-air. And it sounds really weird in here because we’re all on headset microphones. And there’s nothing to do. Anyway, can you spend like $400 to get in here please? Before it closes? Meanwhile, in meatspace, today’s show has got everything you need to remotely grill chicken thighs from down the street, force your kid to sit up straight with a screeching robot, and get the REAL news (from a Christian guy). Bzzt! Reminder! Download this episode now! It’s an all-new YKS! This episode description was written by one of the lowest-regarded free-to-use AIs.

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

They say there’s no time like the present…but how about a present that is time! That is, more or less, what we’re doing over at YKS Premium this month as we celebrate Farrarch: Time Marches On, a month of time-centric flicks that only an idiot could love. Speaking of which, last week’s episode was all about idiots, as we brought in our friends Tom Walker and Demi Lardner to riff on the documentary Idiocracy! And this week on the show, our colleague in the “capitalism is bad” space Riley Quinn (Trashfuture) joins for, well, a movie about how capitalism is bad: In Time (2011)!

This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

Factor - When the Factor box shows up at the JF household…you know we’re about to go wild. Folks, I love my quick and healthy lunches so much they don’t even have to taste good to make me happy. But thank goodness they do anyway. Head to FACTORMEALS.com/yks50 and use code YKS50 to get 50% off your first box and join in on the “yum”!

AthleticGreens - I’m a big fan of gut health; always have been. So when I found out about Athletic Greens, the slightly tropical vitamin and adaptogen blend that actually can improve that very same health, I was practically floored. But it’s true! Start your day the JF way with AG1, and get a 1 year supply of Vitamin D + 5 free travel packs at athleticgreens.com/YKS

.Tech - Got a website? Well you probably have a domain! Don’t feel bad if you didn’t know it, because frankly most of the domains out there are boring, bland, and just plain easy to overlook. Stand out from the crowd with a .Tech domain…basically it’s the “cool domain”. That’s why we’re on it! “Go” to go.tech/yks and get an automatic 15% discount on 1 year and 5 year .Tech Domains.

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Episode 294: Lil Data Monsters Mar 13, 2023

That awkward moment when it’s Monday morning and we have to either go to work or pretend to work from home or just sit around and do whatever…Oh brother! I wish there was something to help pass the time but in a non-threatening, not super memorable kind of way! Well gang, good news. Your friends Mike and JF are here to tell you all about the metal detecting candy bucket, a subscription that makes video on your cell phone look worse on purpose, and a way to keep the beacon of patriotism shining bright no matter the weather! Plus a bunch of pieces of shit by some loser! So hop in the Nissan Pumper and race on over to your doctor, it’s time to ask if irreverent comedy podcasting is right for you! 200ccs of funny comin right up, on an all new YKS!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

YKS Premium…your premiere destination for everything YKS: from the jeers to the cheers, and everything in between. Over on Patreon, Farrarch continues with the always fantastic Tim Kalpakis and the sometimes fantastic Rian Johnson, as we discuss Looper! And next week…put your balls away because we’ve got our friends from BigSoftTitty.png, Tom Walker and Demi Lardner coming on to talk Idiocracy! The documentary!

This episode of YKS is brought to you by these fine brands:

Get.Tech - Tired of the same old domains? We were…that’s why we snagged yourkickstartersucks.tech! Join the tech club with the rest of us at go.tech/yks and get 15% off 1 and 5 year .tech domains!

HelloFresh - We love foodmeals yes we do, we love foodmeals how about you! HelloFresh makes dinner so easy, even I can eat it! Go to HelloFresh.com/yourkickstartersucks60 and use code yourkickstartersucks60 for 60% off plus free shipping!

NordVPN - Grab your EXCLUSIVE NordVPN Deal by going to nordvpn.com/YKS to get a Huge Discount off your NordVPN Plan + a Bonus Gift! It’s completely risk free with Nord’s 30 day money-back guarantee!

Honey - Honey! The nice friend we all love who can find coupon codes for you! Grab yourself a toolbar buddy at JoinHoney.com/YKS and save some money on a new deadbolt lock. Or whatever else. That’s just what I’m thinking of right now because it’s what I did.

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Episode 293: Justin Bieber Best Artist of the World Mar 06, 2023

I’m watching one of those stupid pawn shows while I’m sitting here writing this episode description out, and man, are these the stupidest shows ever made or what? I mean I don’t know who is watching them, other than total morons, because they don’t say anything worth a damn and it’s so boring it puts me to sleep. Then you got the ads, and they’re even worse! Next thing you know, they’ll be asking you to subscribe just to hear even more of their inane crap? God, don’t give them any ideas. Anyway, call in your friends the Piss Whizzard, the Kickstarter CEO, and Billy West, and crack open a Pepsi of Shame, cause it’s time for an all new YKS!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

Some day the aliens will come to Earth and give us the power to experience funny ass jokes and moderately informative film criticism simultaneously. Until then, we’ll all have to settle for 3 boneheads making dick jokes and talking about movies: Farrarch! This past Friday we had one of the all time great boneheads Chris James uncork Jesseuary IV with a great flick, 2016’s Arrival. And just in case you thought we were gonna get any less boneheaded, we got our buddy Tim Kalpakis back for next week’s episode on the great Rian Johnson’s Looper! It’s a bonehead meeting, and you’re invited, only at YKS Premium.

This week’s YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

Athletic Greens - Vitamins…now that’s what I call adaptogens! With AG1 I’m getting all that stuff in one swig rather than 50 different pills and capsules and so forth. Pretty good! Get a free 1 yr supply of Vitamin D (good vitamin) and 5 travel packs at AthleticGreens.com/yks

Factor - Meals and food! Meals and food! We love em around here, and Factor’s got some nice quick, ready to heat and eat meals they’ll send right to ya. Get 50% off your first box at FactorMeals.com/YKS50

RocketMoney - We all have too many subscriptions…well I have the perfect amount but I have heard that some people have too many. There should be an easy way to get control of one’s spending, maybe with an app or something??? Oh well! RocketMoney.com/yks

BetterHelp - Get 10% off your first month at BetterHelp.com/yks

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Episode 292: Must Read To Dogs Feb 27, 2023

Hey Lois! Bring me one of those episodes of that show I like listening to so much. Oh Peter, you stupid son of a bitch, fine! It’s an all-new YKS! On today’s show we got an attachment for a vacuum cleaner even less useful than that stupid little brush one that doesn’t spin, porno puzzles, and a floaty that lets everyone know you’re a stupid piece of shit! That would be more than enough for one episode, but of course as you know we normally have 6 Kickstarters and I’ve pretty much only named 3 here in the episode description so there are probably at least 3 not as notable ones left to hear in the show. Plus the episode title is 1. So smash that play button and hear the last 2 Kickstarters we did this week, in addition to the ripoff Switch game. Oh no!! Crap!!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

Jesseuary Returns. This March. Only on YKS Premium.

This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

NordVPN - EXCLUSIVE NordVPN Deal ➼ https://nordvpn.com/yks Try it risk-free now with a 30-day money-back guarantee!

HelloFresh - (To the tune of that classic hair metal song) Meals! Meals! Meals! Gang, let me tell you, we love HelloFresh in this house. Quick, easy, and oh so good, you can almost always find me cookin’ up a box of these good eats! Grab one yourself at HelloFresh.com/yourkickstartersucks65 for 65% off plus free shipping!

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Episode 291: The Clumsy Bird Challenge Feb 20, 2023

It’s Presidents Day! Yay! Now I know that every single one of these guys is bad for a variety of, but mostly pretty similar, reasons. And I know that in a best case scenario, at least half of the people who are even alive had extreme antipathy towards the guys from their lifetime included in this holiday. BUT. Well I can’t think of a silver lining here. Maybe you got off work. Probably not though. Well anyway let the YKS boys keep you company with this episode of their newest crap! We got a wearable universe, the return of those shitty watches from the mall kiosk, and honestly two of the most wonderful ideas to make money on the internet that I have ever seen or heard about. Check ‘em out today…just like ol’ Woodtooth Johnson, or whatever psycho this holiday is about. Salute!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

YKS Premium! That’s the thing I’ve been meaning to tell you about. Because you seem like a discerning podcast listener who could use a few more japes, jokes, and j-can’t think of ones in their lives. Sign up today and enjoy hundreds of hours of outrageous bonus content that will feel like even more!

This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

Factor - I confess, I’m already thinking about lunch. Sue me! Today I will probably have my famous “Chalk Sandwich” but honestly I’d rather have a meal from Factor. They are good, good for you, and honestly a lot more convenient than putting a piece of chalk between two pieces of bread and gnawing on it like a dog. Get 50% off your first box at FactorMeals.com/YKS50

BetterHelp - Therapy. Not everyone is into it. I get it. Maybe you’ve got some other things you do to keep running at a high level. What do you do, make a bunch of comments under videos of old hair metal songs going “I remember this.”? Well that’s not as good honestly. Try some remote online therapy with BetterHelp. And rock on. Get 10% off your first month at BetterHelp.com/yks.

Athletic Greens - I’m drinking my Athletic Greens right now. And yes that does kind of betray that I’m writing the episode description the morning that the show is supposed to come out. But dammit, I believe in transparency and truth-telling. The fact of the matter is, these adaptogens are good, and I am running quite late. Get a year’s supply of Vitamin D (one of the good vitamins) and 5 free travel packs at AthleticGreens.com/yks. Don’t delay til the morning, do it now!

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Episode 290: The No Mistake show Feb 13, 2023

Here we are folks, a Monday morning in many parts of the world, and we’re all thinking one thing: it’s time to listen to some guys on a podcast talk about their feelings. That is, if their toxically masculine producer (currently using a laptop on the toilet) will allow it! On today’s show, we get real, and we’re talking about loving lamp, introducing you to the MyThings ecosystem, and of course, not making a single mistake! Plus we’ve got another beautiful couple (boo!) with a questionable business venture, a water bottle that can do one of the main things I would probably not ask a water bottle to ever do, and basically the “final boss” of annoying Kickstarter video songs. This sounds like an episode worthy of being number 290, don’t you think?

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

Everyone was so mad when we didn’t do Jesseuary this month – and guess what, I get it! I’m mad at me, too! Punish us good by signing up for YKS Premium…it’s the only way we’ll learn!

This week’s episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

Rocket Money - We all have too many subscriptions. I’ve heard of some people who are actually getting bugs delivered to their houses every month. Really??? Well no, but you can imagine if they did. And that says a lot about society. Eliminate unnecessary subscriptions, like BugMail, with Rocket Money. RocketMoney.com/YKS

BetterHelp - We all could use a little help sometimes. But it would be nice if the help was from an empathetic, qualified professional. I’ve been talking to a cuff! Get 10% off your first month at betterhelp.com/yks

Honey - Coupon codes…friend AND foe? Where are they when we need them! Hiding, like the cowards they are. Smoke ‘em out of their holes, with Honey! JoinHoney.com/YKS

NordVPN - EXCLUSIVE NordVPN Deal ➼ https://nordvpn.com/YKS Try it risk-free now with a 30-day money-back guarantee!

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Episode 289: The Other Side of the Line Feb 06, 2023

A new YKS! That’s Pawesome! On today’s show, we’re doing a little fashion show with a guy who I would say seems to be making an actionable threat on our lives, a cell phone app that somehow is even more annoying than being normal called on the phone, and the devastating story of a 6 year old’s dream to run a bandsaw for pwesident twump! And we did it all without Producer Dan! Let’s all prove that anything is possible, and that two guys who have been doing this for several years know how to make a show kind of! Now that’s Bark-some!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan (even when he’s sick!).

Yes, you heard right, Jesseuary has moved to March! But don’t fret, because we’ve got a great month planned over on YKS Premium. This week, we’re joined by Aaron and Stefan from I Hate This Team for an iced-out edition of YKScapades!

This week’s episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

Athletic Greens - Green is one of the primary colors. And one of the primary things you need in your body is vitamins. But where to get them, what kind to get, it’s crazy, and you’d probably have to get a degree in Vitaminology to figure it out. Well not anymore, because Athletic Greens AG1 put ‘em all together and all ya gotta do is sip. Get a free 1 year supply Vitamin D and 5 free travel packs at AthleticGreens.com/YKS

Factor - There are a lot of factors when it comes to meeting our goals, and oh my god I just realized why the company is called that. It’s important to be curious about the world around you, folks. Sometimes you learn something. And sometimes you eat something really good! Like a delicious, healthful, ready to eat meal delivered straight to your doorstep, with Factor. Get it?? Get 50% off your first box at FactorMEALS.com/YKS50

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Episode 288: Hamburger For Brains Jan 30, 2023

Back in the day, things just seemed a lot simpler, didn't they? You made your own card games to sell on Kickstarter, you dookied on a leaf in the woods, and could put your hand right on the shopping buggies! But not anymore. We've all taken the high heels off, gone woke, and turned our brains to hamburger. All to satisfy our Kinky Kravings! And just when you think it can't get any more HORNY, here comes a new YKS down the pike! So grab a hot wire, download this ep and get your first dub in a while! It's YKS time, baby!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

YKS Premium...They're more than great coats! That's just a fun reference to an old commercial from the 1990s. And really, when you get down to it, a reference to an old commercial is basically content. Basically Content -- That's the YKS Premium motto, and never before has it been more true than this past week's episode, in which we debuted the Night of 1000 Segments! It was kind of a fun deconstruction of podcasting which skewered the format while also having some funny songs about poop in it. All that and hundreds of hours of similarly highbrow content, with video, and more, available now at Patreon.com/YourKickstartersucks.

This episode of YKS is brought to you by these fine brands:

NordVPN -- EXCLUSIVE NordVPN Deal ➼ https://nordvpn.com/YKS Try it risk-free now with a 30-day money-back guarantee!

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Episode 287: It Smell The Scam! Jan 23, 2023

Hey everyone it’s time to write the episode description for YKS: Your Kickstarter Sucks. The key to this is to have basically a paragraph of things that show up below the episode file and are only accidentally seen when someone inadvertently swipes their finger on the screen in a weird way. As a result, it doesn’t make any difference what I actually write. Like this! Wahoo! On this week’s show, we got a new way to do something with a bug, one guy trying to convince his wife and himself that he’s not stupid for running into the garage with his bike on top of his car, and a way to be even ruder to restaurant servers! It’s about fucking time!! I was going to start shitting in my seat!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

Need 100% more YKS in your life? (Kevin Harlan voice) Yes! That’s why they invented YKS Premium. Get a bonus episode every week and more, for just a little shitdick fuck piss $5 a month!

This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

Factor – When it comes to getting food in your system, it’s hard to beat the convenience of meals. That is, unless, you get someone else to cook the meals for you and send them right to your door. But that could never happen, right??? Get 60% off your first box at Factor75.com/YKS60

BetterHelp – Now this is nice. It says here you can now, through the advent of modern computer technology, Get 10% off your first month at BetterHelp.com/yks

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Episode 286: Passion Led Us Here Jan 16, 2023

Well it’s YKS time and don’t ya know, that’s basically the Mike and JF show! We don’t really need to be reworking the theme song lyrics on the fly like that but, hey, just goes to show, writing songs is easy. I’m thinking whichever of the Hank Williamses is alive and not problematic for the performance. There’s gotta be one, right? Right?!? On today’s show we have one of the dead and very problematic Hank Williamses, some breaking Nashville Foodie News, Foreskin Gloves, and oh yeah, it’s MIKE’S BIRTHDAY! That means only one thing…Bring it in guys!!! *Every serial inventor from every business school, scammer, crazy scientist, board game guy, Fish Lord, dropshipper, ukulele player, and offensive board game enthusiast come in with everything for a HUGE episode*

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

For ad-free episodes and more, check out YKS Premium! Annual subscriptions get you a free month, and monthly subscriptions get you every month not for free, which makes sense really. At least 5 bonus episodes a month, plus video, and if that’s not enough Mike and JF for ya I really god damn don’t know what I can do to help cause I gotta putter around and eat dinner and stuff.

This week’s episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

Athletic Greens – Think of your body like a well-oiled machine. You wouldn’t run your machine without adaptogens, would ya? Didn’t think so. Well Athletic Greens has got em, and then some! Get a 1 year supply of Vitamin D and 5 free travel packs at AthleticGreens.com/YKS

HelloFresh – My wife was so happy when our HelloFresh box came in this weekend that she coulda kissed me! She didn’t, cause I was sick with Covid. But she could have! And that’s what counts. Get 21 meals plus free shipping at HelloFresh.com/yourkickstartersucks21

NordVPN – EXCLUSIVE NordVPN Deal ➼ https://nordvpn.com/YKS Try it risk-free now with a 30-day money-back guarantee!

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Episode 285: Doobieman and The Heart Brain Jan 09, 2023

We recorded this episode on January 6th, which was a very important day in history. Actually I don’t think we did. Or maybe we did, I’m not sure. But, did you see how easily you can be manipulated by the media? Let that be a lesson to you, and to the January 6th guys, and I don’t know, like, people from everywhere in the world or other planets and stuff. Wow. This sounds like an important episode. And it is! Because on this episode we’re talkin Fartcars, Bible vibes, and Brain Hacks. And don’t say we’re the brain hacks. We’re good guys!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

YKS Regular…nice, nice. But I wish there was more of a luxury experience, suited for only those with the most discriminating podcast taste buds. You are in luck! There probably is. But if you can’t find it, check out YKS Premium, the place for even more Mike and JF. Decent consolation prize??

This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

Honey – Coupon Codes…as a frequent shopper, they’re something of a white whale for me. And Honey has helped me spear them. Or whatever happens in the book I’m sorry I don’t remember. Get it yourself at JoinHoney.com/YKS – Savings ahoy!

RocketMoney - I’m sick and tired of these dadgum subscriptions on this goshdang bank statement! RocketMoney wants to help. The average Rocket Money user saves up to $720 a year! Wow! I guess I’ll go to RocketMoney.com/YKS and check it out. Or you do it, I mean.

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Episode 284: Friends Are Really Talking - F.A.R.T. Jan 02, 2023

The first episode of 2023! I wonder what this year will hold. Well, first of all, hold this L. Come back in a few years and see if we’re still saying that. Plus, see if we’re still talking about the Lockhorns, the Splorks, and hey, is Mike still telling his little stories? Or did we all wither away like some shit that you just know would be very easy to wither…Ah, who can say. Except our friends and tastemakers, the YKS Guys. Gentlemen…

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

Don’t like the ads? Well, send us a bizarre rant and then sign up for YKS Premium! We’ve got ad-free episodes, Discord access, and much more. Last year, we even had our friends John Cullen and Stefan Heck back on for our acclaimed (?) Who Wants To Be an Extreme Millionaire series, and considering their performance, it may be the last time they’re allowed to do any podcasting anywhere! Sign up today at Patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks.

This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

Athletic Greens - Green…it’s one of the many colors of the rainbow. But it’s healthy! More than you can say for Mauve, I bet. Let’s get some tasty vitamins and minerals in ya for 2023, gang. With Athletic Greens. Get 1 year of Vitamin D and 5 free travel packs by signing up at athleticgreens.com/yks

Factor - Healthy meal prep is so annoying. I was looking for stuff today and there were a bunch of blogs called, like, The Yummy Grubby and stuff. I’m done with it. I’m going Factor style. Get 60% off your first box at factor75.com/yks60

BetterHelp - Laughter is the best medicine. That’s why listening to YKS is like going to the free student clinic. But there’s other kinds of doctors too, it turns out, and they can help with mental health! Get 10% off your first month at BetterHelp.com/YKS

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Episode 283: Bean Poison 2022 Dec 26, 2022

Look, if it’s alright with you, I’m going to take it easy on the episode description here at the end of the year. It’s the last one, I’m pretty tired, and you know what these things are all about. We said some pretty silly stuff in this one, and we did some Kickstarters as well. One of them was a Catholic board game! Isn’t that weird? Yeah we thought so too. What were the other ones? Well, there’s only one way to find out. Find me in public and beat me to within an inch of my life until I’m forced to reveal every single project in the 6 pack to you! It’s the only way! See you in 2024!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

We had a great 2022 at YKS Premium! 2023 is, presumably, going to be even better. Grab an annual subscription today and get a free month as a YKS Official Delightful Reward. Or, better yet, pay by the month but don’t unsubscribe at any point! That works out better for me, to be honest!

This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

RocketMoney - Coupon codes: friend or foe? Hard to say, at times. But with RocketMoney, the promo code field is simply a detente. Does that make sense? Well, who cares. Save some money for your own self at RocketMoney.com/yks

NordPass - Keep your passwords secure, instead of insecure…makes sense, right? No duh! NordPass got there before you did, dummy! Nab 3 free months at nordpass.com/yks

BetterHelp - Therapy is great…I do it all the time! And you see how I got it together. Get 10% off your first month at BetterHelp.com/yks

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Episode 282: On Angels Wings Dec 19, 2022

Wow, folks! It’s the last YKS before Christmas! Hopefully you have laid the 80s horror VHS tapes out by the old tube tv, taken one bite of the Delta-8 edibles and placed them on the Elvira plate, and filled up a cup with sour Gatorade. Soon, two annoying guys will be knocking on your front door asking if they can come in and use your bathroom! Will they be leaving presents? Perhaps! That depends on how you feel about a VR archery set, a new way to open up plastic bags, and a hat with a QR code on it that maybe orders a type of drink for you? Not sure. Who bought this crap, my weird uncle!? My uncles are all cool actually I just meant sometimes people have weird ones. I don’t know. Uncles take a beating around the holidays, don’t they? We need a day that’s safe for uncles. Uncle Day. We are looking into this very strongly! Have a good one.

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.

This really is the season of giving…money! To your favorite independent content creators! In exchange for even more of their high-quality audio and video content! I’m talking, of course, about YKS Premium – the only gift Santa can’t give! We won’t let him on the premises. We have a restraining order against Jolly Old Saint Nick. He was pulling his pud over by my heat pump. Help us sue him into oblivion by subscribing today!

This episode of YKS is brought to you by these fine brands:

Schedule35.co - Not all drugs are created equal. Some of them are from the earth! Microdosing psilocybin has some pretty good effects, it sounds like. Plus you don’t get all wacky with it, which is nice. So check it out and get 15% off with code YKS at Schedule35.co

BetterHelp - Yes, lots of stuff is important. So is therapy. I guess like, gold is important? And silver? But we’re talking about therapy, which is so nice to do for yourself sometimes. And you can get 10% off your first month at BetterHelp.com/yks. Use the savings to buy some precious metals!

Faherty - One thing about me is, I love putting on my little clothes and walking around. And Faherty makes some of the best stuff in my closet. But golly I’d like to pay about 80% of what I’d normally pay! And with the code YKSPOD, I can! Because YKSPOD will get you 20% off, at FahertyBrand.com/YKSPOD.

Factor - ME: I sure am hungry! FOOD: Oh how about me? ME: That’s a good idea. But I don’t know how to get you! FOOD: Uhhh, this just happened. Excuse me, I mean that just happened. ME: Wow! I’ll just type in go.factor75.com/yks60 to my favorite browser and then hit enter or return or whichever one it is. Then, later, I’ll eat food! FOOD: That’s swag.

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Episode 281: Wings…And More! Dec 12, 2022

Look, the thing about the episode today is that we got a lot of ideas about hot dogs. And chicken wings. I guess we were pretty hungry when we recorded the episode. But when it’s YKS Nights…that’s just the kind of crazy stuff you’re gonna get! On today’s show, we’re visiting the Kingdom of Fufu, but just for tonight only! Plus, we got some corny shoe stuff not even I can endorse, a way to stay warm at the office that’s NOT setting the Foreman Grill out the night before, and finally saving Canada from the thorny grip of woke! Gather your Missisaugan friends around the iPad…it’s time to listen to YKS!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.

Here’s an excellent holiday gift for the person in your life who needs to see or have some good stuff: YKS Premium! Get a free month when you pay for a full year – It’s a Christmas miracle!

This week’s episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

Schedule35 - Microdose – doesn’t sound like much, but studies show a “small” amount of psilocybin can have a “big” effect! Micro is a prefix meaning “small”. That’s why I said that. Get 15% Off with code YKS at Schedule35.co

Athletic Greens - Routines are important. My morning routine is that I wake up, scream in the mirror, and down a cup of vitamins and adaptogens in the form of Athletic Greens AG1. Then it’s back to screaming. And I’ve got all the energy I need for a day of screaming. Get a 1 year supply of Vitamin D and 5 free travel packs at athleticgreens.com/YKS

Rocket Money - I’m sick of these motherfreaking subscriptions on this motherfreaking plane! Very possibly something you might say when signing up for a subscription while traveling on a plane. I know I have! Let’s get rid of some of this stuff together, with our friends at Rocket Money. What the heck – I’m paying $9.99/mo for Snakes? Rocketmoney.com/yks

BetterHelp - I’m one of those guy who hears “therapy on the computer” and starts thinking retail therapy! No, but in all seriousness, talking to someone about your problems can really help. And I doubt they’re going to tell you to get a new coffeemaker to cheer yourself up. But I’m not a licensed anything, and I say, sure, if you like coffee, go for it. But do the other stuff, too. Get 10% off first month at betterhelp.com/yks

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Episode 280: It’s Giving Dec 05, 2022

Damn my feet smell really bad! That’s not pertinent to today’s episode, but I do think it’s a compelling way to start off the episode description, because you start to go…hmm..I wonder if JF”s feet were stinking during the episode? Or, like did they maybe start to stink right after? And if so, why? Was he out running around without socks? Probably not, it’s winter, but maybe he rushed out the door to get the paper and stepped in a dog’s poop. But then you gotta wonder, do I get the paper delivered? And whose dog poop was it? He called the shit poop!

Anyway on today’s episode, our werewolf values are under attack! So we go all the way in on another piece of crap landfill robot pet, luggage for people who miss Bird scooters, and a child’s idea. Equal opportunity offenders here, gang. It would actually be unfair if we didn’t do it. And, in fact, the mainstream media wouldn’t, so that’s why we have to. It’s important that we’re like this!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.

I’m down on all fours beggin ya…check out YKS Premium! We’ve been on a “hot streak” lately, and last week’s Cool Cat Catch-Up episode is an absolute can’t-miss for anyone who likes weird little guys doing strange little things. Just $5 gets ya, on average, about 4.3 such Certified Classics per month, plus ad-free episodes and access to the YKS Pisscord!

This week’s episode is brought to you by these fine brands:

Schedule 35 – Mushrooms that make ya feel different, huh? Sounds good enough to build a whole kingdom around! I really believe that!! Get 15% Off with code YKS at Schedule35.co

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HelloFresh – Meals...we all need to eat them and yet, where do they come from? Hard to say. Lot of them are plants, as I recall. And that's about all I know. I'm a meals amateur. The pros are over at HelloFresh! Go to HelloFresh.com/yourkickstartersucks18 and use code yourkickstartersucks18 for 18 free meals plus free shipping to see if the stuff comes from plants or whatever it is.

BetterHelp – Hey! You there! Like Help? Me too. That's why I go to therapy. But sometimes the hard part is the "going" part. So let's bring the therapy to you...just like your precious mail! Grab 10% off your first month at betterhelp.com/yks and stop talking to your mail delivery person!

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Episode 279: Grandma’s Leg Washers Nov 28, 2022

Well, Thanksgiving is over! All of the little cousins have gone on their walks, all of the uncles have done their politics, and all of the Karens have returned their half-eaten turkeys for store credit because they found a bird poop in the neckhole. Now what?! We all return to our schools or works?? And just sit there without eating a bunch of bread?? This sucks! Yeah, it does. That’s why they invented YKS. Hey, maybe this will kind of suck a little bit less. And if not, hey, free poop in the neckhole.

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.

More YKS! Many people are saying it. And many people are getting it as well, by going to Patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks! Find bonus episodes, hundreds of hours of video, merch discounts, and more at the URL at the end of the previous sentence. j

This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

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BetterHelp - Therapy is goated. And you already know how I feel about going online! BetterHelp, well, they figured out a way to combine the two into one thing, saving time and energy and probably the environment as well. Get 10% off your first month at BetterHelp.com/yks

NordPass - Hey make sure your password has a number, a symbol, and a freaking recipe for the perfect macaroni and cheese to continue. WHaaa?? Coming up with these things is too dadgum hard, and that’s before it even comes down to memorizing them. That’s why we all need a password manager like NordPass. Get a 3-month free trial at nordpass.com/YKS with code YKS

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Episode 278: The Pepsi Universe Nov 21, 2022

Now this is what I'm talking about right here! An Episode of YKS? And the word Episode is being capitalized now for no reason? Kind of weird, kind of cool. Plus it's Monday, my favorite day of the week! Damn. It sure doesn't get any better than this! On today's show we're celebrating our friends, Women, by making fun of some projects explicitly not targeting us loutish clods in any way, taking our hose everywhere we go, and using a little sucky toy to try to keep all the bleep from coming right out of our bloop! If that's not enough to get you to click on the link, maybe direct cash payments to your bank account will be? Let us know!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.

Oh my god, they're still doing YKS Premium! That's right folks, by somewhat popular demand, where it's like maybe more demand than you'd think but still there could be more demand overall, Mike and JF have returned for yet another week of bonus episodes. Sign up today at Patreon.com/YourKickstarterSucks for hundreds and hundreds of hours of the exact type of crap you like, merch discounts when our store returns (soon!), Discord access and more.

This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

NordPass - Access to our various items is so important...it's tempting to make it very insecure! HUGE MISTAKE! That's when calamity strikes! Keep calamity away from your passwords, credit cards, and more -- unless you like calamity?? Uh, you shouldn't. It's bad. See NordPass Business in action now with a 3-month free trial at nordpass.com/YKS with code YKS

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Factor - Factor is so good, man. It's crazy! We're talking healthy, delicious, easy meals delivered right to your door. And all you gotta do is heat em up. And eat em. And like, wash the fork and stuff. But what do you want, Forkbox? Head to https://go.factor75.com/yks60 for 60% off your first box!

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Episode 277: Lotto Losers Nov 14, 2022

It’s another episode of YKS starring Danny 2 Phones and his duo of lovable losers! On this week’s episode, we’re making a popcorn run with Orville Weedensmoker to the 4 Glomp Realm, and praying they’re isn’t actually something in my mouth even though it feels like there really is and it’s gonna make me throw up. Plus, we’ve a great new way to drop your infant, an idea that a pothead came up with and weirdly makes no sense, and monetizing retail cashier harassment. My god…How do they keep getting away with making such great episodes!!!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.

Want more YKS? Check out YKS Premium! Last week we were proud to present our Annual YKS Salute To Service. Just fucking kidding! We DID, however, break down all the politics going on in the world nowadays, which if you don’t know anything about them, suffice to say, they have been really crazy. The politics have, I mean. And therefore, the episodes of our celebrated comedy-alternative podcast have, as well.

This week’s episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

Athletic Greens - I love my gut, but boy does it have its issues. If only there were a way to increase my adaptogen intake…but the only adaptogens I know of don’t have a pleasantly fruity taste…Wait just a minute! Get 1 year of Vitamin D and 5 free travel packs at AthleticGreens.com/yks

BetterHelp - “Mind your mind and your rewards will be divine” - Unknown Poet. Wow. Makes you think. But sometimes thinking is tough, and you need another thinker in there tinkering around with ya. That’s where therapy comes in, and specifically in this case, online therapy from BetterHelp. Try it for 10% off your first month at BetterHelp.com/yks

RocketMoney - These subscriptions, man….I dunno. Some of them are good – great, even. Some of them I could never live without. Many of them support our wonderful independent content creators! Others, however, are garbage. And we need help to tell the difference! Enter Rocket Money. Save hundreds by canceling useless subscriptions today at RocketMoney.com/YKS

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Episode 276: The Flubisode Nov 07, 2022

Hey look at THESE! It’s, give or take, about 120 minutes of unhinged goofiness from two old guys who should, frankly, know better. But we just don’t care! On today’s show, we’re munching on crispy rounds in the tractor forums, buying Penis Coins while they’re still on sale, making our Toaster confessions, and doing it all over the whirr of a tree trimmer. Our friends at Tree of Souls won’t be happy to hear that, of course, but for them, we’re pitching in an industrial strength AI ankle breaker, a painting tool for morons, a cure for boredom while driving a Tesla, and inexplicably, something Mike actually likes and wants to buy. And no flubs! (Sorry, Bryan)

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.

I Stand With YKS Premium! For bonus episodes, ad-free YKS, our Squeeze Louise video feed, Pisscord access and more, there’s only one place to go: Hell! Just kidding, it’s YKS Premium. Last week, against all odds, we were able to put out a funny episode without any old ass horror movies to talk about. And this week…we’ll do it again! See what kind of crazy crap we come up with, every Friday, at Patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks

This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

BetterHelp - Listen up, brain. It’s time to get yourself fixed. And if you won’t do it, I’ll find someone who will! That’s why I go to therapy…to make my problems someone else’s! Just kidding, sort of. Try this method or others for yourself, with online therapy like BetterHelp today. Get 10% off your first month at BetterHelp.com/yks

HelloFresh - Every week we get the little email that says “Best News Ever! Your HelloFresh Box Was Delivered!” Kind of cute. I think some better news would be winning $1.9B in the lottery. But if they sent me that email it would probably just go to spam. So you know what, HelloFresh is right. Food’s Here! Pretty good. Get 65% off plus free shipping at HelloFresh.com/yourkickstartersucks65

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Episode 275: The Halloween Episode with Mike Hell, Jesse Fearrar, and “Devil Eggs” Dan Oct 31, 2022

OOOooooOOOOahhhhaaaOOOaaahhhwaaoooooohhhh! This is some scary ass damn crap! It’s the Halloween episode of YKS, and you already know the 666 pack is bursting at the screams with all kinds of horrifyingly bad Kill…uh, screamers! So whether you’re in your Nissan Hexterra or Tasting the Heath on a trick or treat run, crank up this very spooky edition of YKS, and beware the thumping caskets!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.

Miketober is over, and everyone is so sad! Well, tough titty! But one big, soft titty to remember is that these episodes are forever! Check out ALLL the gory, goopy goodness, with Rucking Fotten’s Jeff Haidaczuk, Dan O’Sullivan, Keith Buckley, and Howell Dawdy, at the YKS Premium Patreon. And now, back to even scarier programming: our normal crap!

This week’s episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine sponsors:

Honey - Coupon codes: Friend or Foe? Hard to say…I sure do love them when they’re hitting, but boy they can be elusive. That’s where Honey comes in. Just download their fancy little tool on iOS or your desktop browser, and go to town. Save $15 on a special cake! No one can tell you not to! Check it out today at JoinHoney.com/YKS

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Episode 274: Mike’s Joke Corner Oct 24, 2022

Do I detect a new segment?? That Mike hates a lot?? Oh baby! I’m like a pig in shit. (Pigs like to be in shit, if you don’t know a lot about pigs or shit.) On today’s show we reflect on Enjoying the Film, HorseTimes, and, yes, Mike’s Joke Corner. That’s why I named the show that! Plus, we got iFood (finally!), a stupid fuckin pen, the Mikey Miles Fitness Routine, and I think there’s at least one Kickstarter in here that someone will get mad at us for talking about, so that’s good. But come on. With that thing.

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.

Hey if you want to support the show and get a truly outrageous amount of content in exchange, head on over to YKS Premium, where we’re excited to show you the latest in cutting edge paid podcasts. This month we’re celebrating Miketober, with some of our favorite friends and nastiest movies. And next month we will be doing BallBag November where I whack DB in the ballbag every week until he pukes. Check it out.

Faherty - Here comes Mr Autumn Man! That’s me. I’m wearing my Faherty pullover right now and it’s genuinely one of my favorite pieces of clothing I own. You cannot have it! I have my stink on it already! Get your own! Use code YKS at FahertyBrand.com for 20% off some new spring – or autumn – or whatever! Classics. But leave mine alone.

BetterHelp - It’s so cool to think your little thoughts. But how about sharing them with someone else? Also not too bad! Look, solving problems is one tough assignment, and you need a game plan. Unfortunately John Madden is dead, so you’re gonna need the next best thing: a professional counselor! Get 10% off your first month at BetterHelp.com/YKS

NordVPN - EXCLUSIVE NordVPN Deal ➼ https://nordvpn.com/yks Try it risk-free now with a 30-day money-back guarantee!

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Episode 273: The Putt Putt Sniper Oct 17, 2022

Wow I just watched a good ass football game and now while I’m feeling all hyped up, I’m going to write up the episode description for my minor hit comedy podcast, Your Kickstarter Sucks! I bet this is what Michelangelo felt like, when he was really in a groove doing a painting or whatever. And maybe the place where he went to college won a big game. University of Italy defeats France State! And Michelangelo is flying over the stadium in one of his weird flying contraptions, smoking a big cigar. Wow, history sure was amazing! Anyway on today’s show we’re talking about toe condoms, the Ed Gein Card Game, and Producer Dan’s favorite state: Florida! Plus some really weird Kickstarters you are definitely going to want to listen to us talk about while you’re in the shower. So grab a ziploc and go to town on yourself with a rag…it’s YKS!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.

Look I’m not just saying this cause you look really smart/cool/good with money/trickable (pick 2), but really, YKS Premium is one of the best deals in the business right now. Just $5 a month gets you 5 bonus episodes and access to hundreds, if not billions, of shows in our expansive back catalog. Toss in $3 more and you get video of every YKS Premium! That’s right, YKS on your TV! And all this…ad free, delivered to you via the scrappy and lovable Patreon app, and with a convenient resubscribe every month option helpfully pre-selected. It just doesn’t get any better than that! Oh wait yes it does, cause it’s…MIKETOBER!!!

This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

Factor – It occurs to me to me that I think of Factor as the healthy, easy, and delicious meals I get to eat for lunch sometimes, but that’s not really true. For one thing, lunch and dinner are basically interchangeable, right? Plus they got a bunch of other stuff on there, too. Shakes and juices and cookie and wellness shots and sausages and stuff? Oh well, to me, they are “Mr Yummy Lunch”! Get $60 off your first box at go.factor75.com/yks60

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Honey – I just used Honey a few minutes ago to save a nice chunky change on a cake I was ordering! I’m serious! I really hope I remember this anecdote when it comes time to do the next ad read! Download it for yourself at JoinHoney.com/YKS and save some of your own cake money!

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Episode 272: John's Apartment Oct 10, 2022

Pre-recorded from Canada in our friend's secondary bedroom...it's YKS! This week on the show we take over BP Studios in unseasonably waaaaarm Vancouver, British Columbia, and force Blocked Party hosts John Cullen and Stefan Heck to participate in some main episode nonsense such as: talking to Producer Dan (off-mic), criticizing a perfect stranger's dreams and goals, and mispronouncing words in a way that gives plausible deniability to a claim that we were just joking. Plus! We got a very, uh, ambitious attempt to explain Chinese Traditional Medicine to Westerners, a podcast that's worse than most of ours probably, and a cat backpack that not even a catfreak would like! Sounds like enough to do a show about, huh? Yep, we thought so too.

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.

(grabbing Sporange and regular podcast RSS feed Subscribers by the lapel, in a cool way but still with a compelling flair) Hey! Did ya know you could get videos of all the great Miketober episodes by upgrading your subscription by just $3/mo? That's right! Join Mike and myself and our many fabulous guests in pristine HD video (where available) as we not only talk out loud, but appear physically and emote in time to various goings-on. Week 1 has already dropped, and Jeff Haidaczuk from Rucking Fotten was nice enough to stop by and talk about a slow burn creeper called Sole Survivor...A great one to have watched before I got on a bunch of planes! Next week: Society (1989)!

Download Blocked Party wherever you want (this week's ep looks good, with Tom and Demi! Start there and work backwards, why not?) And support the show on Patreon here. Or there. That's the same link I just typed it twice.

This week's episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

RocketMoney - Yes, the name is taking some getting used to. But everything you presumably loved about TrueBill -- the intuitive way it helps you save on recurring subscriptions, all that extra cash sitting around becoming less valuable over time because of the dreaded Economy, etc., is still there with RocketMoney! And thank God for that! Check it out today at RocketMoney.com/yks

AthleticGreens - As a growed up type person, nobody wants to be told to drink more water...that's why I say, let's make Water Fun! With Athletic Greens! I just dump the stuff into a cup with some wet goodness already floating around in there, and blammo, I'm getting vitamins shooting out of every orifice. Jealous much? Get 5 free travel packs and a year's supply of Vitamin D at AthleticGreens.com/yks

BetterHelp: Therapy?? From the comfort of Home? Hey...don't mind if I do! Get 10% off your first money at BetterHelp.com/yks

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Episode 271: And Introducing...Giovanni! Oct 03, 2022

I'm in Canada! You can't make me do a long episode description cause I don't want to! On today's show we've got a streaming service that actually looks not too good (can you believe it!), a card game about poo (kinda?), and a guy making an entertainment product based on a meme from several months ago (member that??). Plus, some other stuff! I'm away, like I said, so gather up your crick coins and have some fun!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.

MIKETOBER III starts Friday, and you can only get it at YKS Premium!! Be there, or have some guy slowly wander out into traffic in front of you! On this week's show, we're joined by Jeff Haidaczuk from Rucking Fotten to discuss...Sole Survivor (1984)!

This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

HelloFresh! - Now that I'm traveling, I really miss my HelloFresh meals! Why didn't I get them sent up here to Canada with me! All I've had is maple syrup and "Gordies"??? I really wish I could come back to our place and whip up a nice healthy 20 minute meal with HelloFresh. But these Gordies ain't gonna eat themselves I guess...Get 65% off plus Free Shipping at hellofresh.com/yourkickstartersucks65!

BetterHelp! - "If there was a problem yo I'll solve it. Check out the hook while my DJ revolves it!" <--- I doubt very seriously any therapist is going to say this to you, but if they did it would be kind of a cool 1980s reference. What they'll do instead is help you to solve your own problems, and as a guy who has done all that already, trust me, it's true! BetterHelp is one of many options for therapy and what I like about it is that it's on the computer, where I like to go! Get 10% off your first month at BetterHelp.com/YKS!

NordVPN! - I'm using NordVPN right now while I'm away in the great white north! You can use it too, wherever you are! Grab your EXCLUSIVE NordVPN Deal by going to nordvpn.com/yks to get a Huge Discount off your NordVPN Plan + 4 additional months for free! It’s completely risk-free with Nord’s 30-day money-back guarantee!

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Episode 270: The Weird Episode Sep 26, 2022

It’s a SAD one today, folks, as we show up an absolutely insulting 9 minutes late to a funeral. And it’s for one of our best friends, who has been with us through hard times and soft…Taco Bell. Plus, we got horny monsters, and geometric cat shit, and a return to a certain awesome feline’s cinematic universe. All that and about 5-7 decent riffs that would be in a big YouTube compilation if we ever got our shit together enough to make one. And it’s free! So what the fuck!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.

It’s almost the end of September…hm…what month comes after that, I wonder? Only one place to find out: YKS Premium.

This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

Factor: You know how they say there are 2.5M ants per person on Earth? Well what if you ate a big sandwich that had all those ants in it for lunch? Wouldn’t be very good, right? Yeah, that’s why I prefer Factor: it’s healthy, delicious, and convenient. And you can use code YKS130 to get $130 off across 6 boxes at go.factor75.com/yks130. And they won’t send you a bunch of ants.

Honey - I really respect my friends at Honey. All they wanna do is save me a few bucks on my purchases at checkout, and they do it. And that’s called setting an intention. Thank you, Honey, for modeling this effective behavior. joinhoney.com/yks

NordVPN - EXCLUSIVE NordVPN Deal ➼ https://nordvpn.com/yks Try it risk-free now with a 30-day money-back guarantee!

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Episode 269: The Dream Episode Sep 19, 2022

You ever get the feeling you’re…in a dream? We’ve all heard of Stranger Things, but that was just a show…right? On today’s episode, the thin line between reality and…something else begins to fray. And YKS may never be the same.

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.

Want more YKS? Yep. I betcha do. Then you’re gonna want to head on over to patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks and sign up for YKS Premium – Da Best Deal In Da Biz (™) Last week, we had the great David Roth on to preview NFL Week 2 and put Dumpy Trump in his cheesetacular place (jail?). This week, you’ve got even MORE episodes to look forward to – this one will probably be about the Woke Pilots we talked about on today’s show and some bad Kickstarters that Missed The Cut, but I’ll let ya know when we release it. Plus, we can’t forget the Squeeze Louise mailbag coming out at the end of the month – all in beautiful HD video! Check it out if you need more stuff to look at.

This week’s episode is brought to you by these fine sponsors:

HelloFresh - Yum yum yum! That’s the type of stuff a certain blue dessert goblin might say when eating his favorite chocolate chip whatever. But us regular folks, we need lean protein and green veggies and fruit and stuff like that. So send some to yourself! It’ll work on any “Street”! Get 16 free meals and 3 free gifts at hellofresh.com/yourkickstartersucks16

Policygenius - Insurance is maybe not the most fun thing in the world to buy. But you gotta do it. I had the same situation and went on Policygenius, bingo bango, I got insurance now. I’m untouchable now! And you can be too. Get some insurance for your own self at Policygenius.com

BetterHelp - Talking to someone else about your problems is great. Some people even have a job where that’s what they do for some reason. But if you don’t have that kinda gig, or hell, maybe especially if you do, therapy is a pretty good idea. And going online for it? You already know! Get 10% off your first month at BetterHelp.com/yks

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Episode 268: The Day Popcorn Changed Forever Sep 12, 2022

On today’s episode, we got some good ass shit goin, okay? If you like $50 bills and ethical dogfighting, you’re gonna like this episode, alright? And if you’re into tape measures that can store all your measurements, putting baseball cards in coffee beans, and flushing bags of dog shit down the toilet, you’re gonna be doin’ just fine for this one too. There’s something for everyone here this week, as long as they like at least one of those specific things and don’t hate one of the other ones so much that it takes away from their enjoyment of the one they do like. Got it?!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.

For more YKS Premium, head on over to YKS Premium. Oh crud. Hang on. I think I messed up! I was supposed to say that differently! But you get the idea. Support the show on Patreon for ad-free episodes, hundreds of hours of bonus content, and more. Last week we had our friend Libby Watson on for a special, mournful edition of Rubbish Lads…and thanks to the integratedPatreon video player’s somewhat less draconian approach to DMCA enforcement, our Squeeze Louise subscribers get all the clips we watched, and our incredible reactions (that’s called Fair Use!), for just $8/month. Coming up this week on YKS Premium: Writer and Trump-knower, David Roth!

This week’s episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

Factor - Factor: Now Serving: Yum Yum Yum! Get $130 off at Go.Factor75.com/yks130

Athletic Greens - I love a somewhat fruity taste. I would honestly drink that even if it was bad for me. Luckily, it’s not! It’s good. Cause it’s green, baby! Get 1 year supply Vitamin D (great vitamin type) and 5 free travel packs at AthleticGreens.com/YKS

Rocket Money - New name alert! TrueBill is dead, long live Rocket Money! Save yourself the headache of all these bills and whatnot, and get on a spaceship to Planet Savings, with Rocket Money! Check em out at rocketmoney.com/yks.

BetterHelp GoodHelp is good, but…yeah, there’s room for improvement there. That’s why they invented BetterHelp: the place where you can go and talk to some folks and you don’t have to let anyone look at ya! Good deal. Get 10% off your first month at BetterHelp.com/YKS

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Episode 267: Parties Remembered Sep 05, 2022

Hey just so you know, the movie I was trying to think of was The Void. It doesn’t come up until way later in the episode, and it does seem like I’m about to get it but honestly I don’t. I get kinda close and then about 5 minutes after we’re done, I figure it out. It ain’t all happy endings, folks. Anyway on today’s show, we’re tossing and turning over Dan’s Proposition, oh and we’re sleepkicking a little bit sure, and we’re telling you why Bill Gates stuck us all with Micro$uck Winblows. Plus a bunch of crap to help you sleep different and eat weirder. It’s YKS time baby!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.

I looooooove YKS Premium so much…I might just marry it! And you are invited to the ceremonies. You can be a guest with access to hundreds of hours of bonus audio content, a member of the wedding party, privy to tons of video episodes and a special VIP Squeeze Louise reception, or you can straight up marry DB if you want. I don’t give a damn. More free food for me!

This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

Spectrum Boutique Our friend Zoë Ligon has a dildo shop! We talked with her on YKS Premium a few months ago about the importance of pleasure and the rather unique ways people have figured out to get their nutt off. Good news! You can buy a lot of those at Spectrum! Use promo code YKS for 10% off and tell our friend Zoë that the YKS boys want ya to cum!

HelloFresh Hello, hello, hello, Fresh. Yum yum yum. Food is good. And it’s nice to eat. Of course you know the rest. We all do. That’s what makes this country great! It’s 2022, why aren’t we getting food in the mail? Oh wait…we are! And it’s pretty good food, too. Thanks, HelloFresh! Get 16 free meals at HelloFresh.com/yourkickstartersucks16

Backbone Gamer Alert! Like playing games? Have a phone? Well Backbone, the best controller for mobile gaming, is for you! Don’t like playing games? No problem, it probably helps you check your emails in a super fun way. Call your mom while using the Backbone. What will happen? Not sure! Get access to over 350 games and perks for FREE at PlayBackbone.com/YKS

BetterHelp I get by with a little help…from the computer! What! Yep that’s right. Ringo was wrong, and we have evolved past the need for friends. Alright well maybe it would be good to get some friends still. I’m thinking sometime in my 40s? Until then, there’s therapy. Get 10% off your first month at BetterHelp.com/YKS

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Episode 266: Toilet Steamies Aug 29, 2022

Monday morning...oh shucks. I was just getting to love the weekend, and now it's gone! Maybe Monday should be the weekend too. Then we'd start the week on Tuesday, nice and fresh. I guess then Tuesday would be the new Monday. Garfield would be fucking pissed, but who cares about that racist? That's right, Garfield the cat was racist. I mean, probably, right? That was a long time ago. It would almost be surprising if he weren't. Piece of shit. Anyway on today's show we've doing a lunchbag takeover with our friend Dan the Glizzy King, getting favstar notifications for our weather reports, and doing the world's shortest update on an old Kickstarter. Plus, Master P is on this one. Remember that guy? Yep, we did too. That's why we did it. Anyway, check it out.

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.

Often it has been said, "YKS is the cure for the common podcast"! And by many highly intelligent, very empathetic, and physically strong individuals, to boot! But what if, every now and then, you felt like you needed a lil booster shot? That's where YKS Premium comes in. Every week, and also sometimes it's two times in one week for some absurd reason, the YKS crew injects you with another hour of fresh content. And best of all, it's all ad-free, available in beautiful HD video, and only occasionally about Kickstarter. YKS Premium...have a seat and squirt some of it in your arm!

This episode of YKS is brought to you by these fine brands:

Factor: Fresh, healthy meals delivered straight to my front door? Buhh? That's the thing I use to go outside! Well, now it's time to use it for something else. To get food. Try it for yourself and get $130 off at go.factor75.com/yks130

Honey: Coupon codes: friend or foe? Sometimes, I just don't know. It seems like they want to help, but they're so hard to find, and sometimes they don't work. It's almost enough to make you give up on them altogether. We need an ally in the Coupon Wars. That's where Honey comes in. Check it out at JoinHoney.com/YKS

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Episode 265: The Cat Who Took A Nap Aug 22, 2022

YKS freaks...you're gonna love this one. Mike is here, JF too, and oh yeah...a guy by the name of PRODUCER DAN shows up? Heard of him?? Thought so. It's a jam-packed ep this week, as the boys are talkin robotic lawncare, the future of porno, and a third thing you're gonna have to hear to believe. Plus...Ask Yoda App?? Someone got there before us? What the hell?? Fuck! So grab the Stinker Sauce and start squirtin' it around...it's a new YKS!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.

Ready to take this YKS thing up a notch? Check out YKS Premium. It's so much fun, it should be illegal! But if it was, it would be like a super huge problem for me. It would be incredibly bad. Like, life-ruining. So let's call our senators, gang. Or whatever.

This week's episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

Backbone - Hey you got any games on your phone? Well now you do. Backbone's controller makes playing mobile games even better...the only problem is when your annoying family calls you in the middle of a round! Boo family! Yay Backbone! Get yours today, plus a bunch of free stuff at playbackbone.com/yks

BetterHelp - Taking care of yourself...what a chore! That's why I like to get someone else in the mix. You know, let them do some of the heavy lifting. Meanwhile, I'm just kind of chilling, right? Hanging back. This is why therapists are so important. Just one man's view, anyway! Get 10% off your first month at betterhelp.com/yks

Diet Smoke - Folks, getting too high can be pretty rough. But on the other hand, what are you gonna do, sit around NOT high? That's why they made Diet Smoke. It's weed, but right in the sweet spot! And legal! Cool! Get 20% off your order -- forever -- at DietSmoke.com with promo code YKS.

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Episode 264: 1 Trick Egg Aug 15, 2022

Damn! I need a low-consumption and energy-saving ice-making cooling cup. But where in the hell…oh! I guess I can get it just about every week on Kickstarter: the website that used to be about cryptocurrency, we think. Gang, on today’s show we’re gettin the monchies, okay? We’re going eemee meemee mimee mow, okay? And we’re extracting chicken tendons like there’s no tomorrow. But god willing, there will be a tomorrow. Because there has to be. Because there needs to be. And if there’s not, we’ll make one. For everyone. What the fuck? I don’t know why I said that, sorry. I think I downloaded the Kamala Harris program or something. Anyway enjoy the program.

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.

YKS Premium is so much fun…YKS Premium is Number One! That’s sort of an alternate history theme song. In a timeline where I wrote the theme songs and really didn’t spend too much time on them…because I was also a world-class glass blowing artisan! Wow! Somebody call the guy who wrote all those alternate histories! Anyway, YKS Premium was a great one last week with the Erin, Adal, and JPC of Hey Riddle Riddle. And this week is exactly the same, except instead of hilarious guests and a cool idea, it’s just the two regular guys with no ideas. Tune in to hear all about “The Goated Player”’s posts of the week, help us decide “What” to “Fund”, and later this month, our Squeeze Louise exclusive mailbag episode drops! Check it out at Patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks

This episode of YKS is sponsored by BetterHelp. I guess if you really think about it, your brain is pretty important. Hey, you just used it to have that last thought, right? Well, keep the good thoughts rolling and try some dang therapy. Now, it’s online! Get 10% off your first month at Betterhelp.com/yks

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Episode 263: And Even More! Aug 08, 2022

You know, it’s not every day that a brand new episode of YKS comes out and immediately gets downloaded to your phone, and you let it suck up 100mb of space while you wait for some bad chores to zone out during. It’s actually every Monday, and as luck would have it, that’s the day of the week that today is! So we put together some questions for our resident Earologist, named the TV Bitch, and remembered fondly the Music City Miracle, plus exposed cancel culture, ate some panties, and made some songs with a computer. Alright, I think that’s good enough to fold laundry to.

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.

YKS Premium! It seems hard to believe at times, but there is even more YKS available for listening and viewing! Check us out over at Patreon to catch up on YKS Beach Party, to see our faces move around when we talk, and get our exclusive mailbag episodes! Coming up this week on YKS Premium: our new friends from Hey Riddle Riddle join us and we try to “Stump the Schwab” them! But instead of stumping, it’s Jokeblogger and Facebook riddles, and instead of Schwab, it’s Erin, Adal, and JPC. Stump the Schwab is a sports trivia show that aired on ESPN 2 about 20 years ago. But what I’m talking about comes out on Friday!

This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

Factor - Now you know they call me Mr. Food for a reason – I’m always eating the stuff! But my word does it get tiring, all the planning and prepping and stuff. Well Factor said, “Forget about it!” and put some of the nice food in a box so they can mail it to you! Nice! I love mail! Get $120 off at go.factor75.com/yks120

Athletic Greens - Green: it’s one of the colors on the big color wheel and rainbow and stuff, but it’s also something you can eat that gives you energy and vitamins and extra HP. Get 1 year supply of Vitamin D and 5 free travel packs at athleticgreens.com/yks

Betterhelp - Help! I need somebody! Help! Probably can’t write out the rest of the lyrics for copyright reasons, and also I should say, I wasn’t writing lyrics, I was just talking out loud. And I was using voice to text. And it was my neighbor talking. Anyway sometimes you need some help, and for my money, therapy’s a good place to get it. Get 10% off your first month at BetterHelp.com/YKS

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Episode 262: Everythings Good Aug 01, 2022

What’s this episode of YKS about? Well, I can tell you what it’s NOT about: saturated fat, trans fat, cholesterol, dietary fiber, total sugars, added sugars, vitamin D, calcium, iron, or potassium. Plus it comes in a small aluminum can with a “color swirl design”, and can be purchased in quantities of 8 or 24. And it tastes alright once you get to be in your 30s. Plus, we’re talking woke fetuses, sales couches, and morbin’ time. Basically a bunch of stupid crap you can see if you go on the computer. And I shoved a “Beach Plum” up my ass. Whatever that is.

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.

YKS Premium! The only place they let us actually be ourselves! This past week, we finished up YKS Beach Party with the one and only Howell Dawdy! Join us for an in-depth discussion of Miss Cast Away and the Island Girls, aka Silly Movie 2. Was it Jacko’s finest work? Well, uh. No! But it was fun anyway. Plus, tomorrow, the Squeeze Louise Mailbag drops! Get YKS Premium today or upgrade your sub to see all our video episodes at Patreon.com/YourKickstarterSucks

This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

HelloFresh - Meals = Food. imagine I just wrote that on the chalkboard at the front of the class. Intimidating, huh? Well, it shouldn’t be. Ideally, you should have this stuff sent to your house in a big box, which you can then open up with like a knife or fork or something. Then it’s time to eat. And hey, you already got the knife and fork. Nice! Get 16 free meals and 3 free gifts at HelloFresh.com/yourkickstartersucks16

BetterHelp - I love my brain! But damn it needs to get it in gear sometimes. That’s why I get plenty of sleep, do my little exercises, and yes, go to therapy! It’s all part of whipping my brain into submission. Throw in going on the computer as well? Forget about it! Get 10% off at BetterHelp.com/yks

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Episode 261: YKS Nights 3: YKS Afternoons Jul 25, 2022

Mike and JF…they are are one “Odd Couple”. Sure, “I Love Lucy”, but something about these two really makes me smile. I guess you could say I’m “Bewitched” by them. Oh, you don’t listen? Well, hey, “Diff’rent Strokes” for different folks. By the way, I have captured and tied up the extraterrestrial creature known as “ALF”; he’s in my basement right now! And so on. Today’s YKS is a good one for everybody but Italians I’m sorry to say, but the rest of you are going to be treated to some new kitchen innovations, a twisted ripoff card game of a twisted ripoff card game, and believe it or not, a really corny and stupid webcomic! It’s a “The Facts Of Life” that you’re gonna like this one! Sorry I closed the Nick at Nite Wiki and couldn’t remember any other ones. Okay see ya.

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.

Bikinis? Check. Robot sidekicks? Check. Michael Jackson? Say whaaaa? The YKS Beach Party continues over at YKS Premium! This week we’re talking the King of Pop’s final scripted role, as Agent MJ in a film known elsewhere as Silly Movie 2 and stateside as Miss Cast Away and the Island Girls. This pile of shit was so disgustingly bad we couldn’t bear to ask anyone normal to do it, so we got our friend,thememaster, and guy who loves garbage, Howell Dawdy back on to put it out of its misery!

This week’s YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

Diet Smoke - There’s nothing worse than being way too high. For some people, this may seem like hyperbole. For certain handsome others, it’s all too true! That’s where Diet Smoke’s “Just Right” level comes in. Plus they got a bunch of new flavors and sodas (SODAAAA!) too. Get 20% off every single time you use the code YKS20 at DietSmoke.com

Honey - Prices go up…and so does my temper! Leading economists have termed this relationship “The Invisible Market”. But with Honey, we have an incredible tool to battle inflation (and maybe other types of -flation? Not sure). Just grab the free extension at JoinHoney.com/YKS and start clicking away to Savingstown! Now that’s what I call “Price Elasticity of Demand” (??)

PolicyGenius - Life Insurance…now there’s a product that, when you buy it, you hope you never have to use it. But statistically speaking, everyone who has ever been born will most likely “pass away”. What a bummer. But it doesn’t have to be a bummer to shop for life insurance, and Policy Genius has seen to that. Their marketplace makes it easy to get the best price on the biggest policies…trust me, I used it! I’m being serious. It’s good to have life insurance. Check it out at PolicyGenius.com. I’m serious!

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Episode 260: YKS Nights 2 Jul 18, 2022

You know what they say about sequels…they’re just as good, if not much better, everyone comes away from them feeling satisfied, and more importantly, wanting even more! That’s why we decided to burn the candle at both ends and pump out another YKS Nights! It’s not because we’re fucking up our schedules! It’s a creative decision! This week we’ve got an answer to the question “What was John Wick like before the movies, and if it wasn’t Keanu Reeves in it?” , some shoes so ugly even JF wouldn’t wear them, and a device for killing bugs that makes that salt shotgun look ingenious by comparison. Plus, Producer Dan eats a burger LIVE! You ain’t gonna get that anywhere else…unless you see Dan walking around, I guess. In which case, DO NOT APPROACH!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.

The Beach Party over at YKS Premium continues! Last week we had our friend Demi Lardner on for a game-packed show you’ll have to hear/see to believe! This week, Alex Goldman and the boys head to Camp…KnowhutImean??

This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

Doctor Butler’s - You ever get some stuff going on “down there”? Tried sitting on an ice cube and it just don’t cut the mustard? Well that’s why “the doc” came up with his famous five star ointments and wipes. Get 20% off your order at DoctorButlers.com when you use the code YKS at checkout! Your ass will thank you!

HelloFresh - Meals, meals, meals, what are we up to, 3 a day now? How am I supposed to keep up with all the nonsense? Well, you can have a plan. A meal plan, that is! And you ain’t gonna get a better one than HelloFresh. Fresh, high quality ingredients you cook in your own home? Is that even legal? Oh yeah, I guess so. Probably not even a question, was it? Get 16 free meals and 3 free gifts at HelloFresh.com/yourkickstartersucks16! It’s legal!

BetterHelp - This is your brain…this is your brain on 100% synthetic motor oil. Or something like that, I think. Your brain is a car. Get it? Start taking care of it! Sure you could pop a vitamin or go sit in the sun for a while – and you should! – but another way to do it is online therapy. And you can get 10% off your first month of that very thing at BetterHelp.com/yks

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Episode 259: YKS Nights Jul 11, 2022

Oooh it’s steamy…ooh it’s dreamy…it’s YKS Nights! YKS Nights is just like YKS Daytime, except, you know, a little…steamier and dreamier. On this week’s episode we got a hell of a lot of hot shaving content that’ll turn you on without a touch. This is so hot, you gotta be yankin me! Come on Hoo Hoo Masters, it’s time to get all steamed up!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.

You’re Invited! All month long on YKS Premium, we’re throwing the biggest blowout bash blast this side of Shangri-La! Join us and our many special guests as we celebrate the summer of silly the only way we know how: podcasting! If you’re not subscribed yet, you missed last week’s episode with our friends John Cullen and Stefan Heck of Blocked Party, who dialed in from the Left Coast to talk Surf School (2006), perhaps Harland Williams’ worst film! $5 today, (or even better, $8) and it’s all yours. More to come!

This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

Factor: Factor in the mornin, Factor in the evenin, Factor at suppertime…When Factor’s sponsoring the show, you can eat Factor anytime! Try out their healthy as hell and yummy as…hell…meals and get $120 off at go.Factor75.com/YKS!

BetterHelp: What if you had one car for your whole life and had to take care of it? I imagine that would get pretty annoying. Well imagine the car lives in your head, and controls your mood and, well, you get the picture. You have to change your brain’s oil! And therapy, will help. Get 10% off your first month at Betterhelp.com/YKS

Athletic Greens: Imagine your body is a car. Wait, no. It’s something though. Something important. And your gut is a part of that. You gotta get the right goop in there and it’s actually pretty hard. But Athletic Greens makes some good goop, and I like it, and it tastes pretty good. Give it a whirl and see if it don’t set ya right. Plus, get 5 free sample packs and a year’s supply of Vitamin D at AthleticGreens.com/YKS!

Truebill: We have a love/hate with our subscriptions, don’t we? Yeah, we love to subscribe to them, and hate to cancel subscribing to them! That’s cause it’s too hard! Well TrueBill makes it easy to cancel your subscriptions, but of course it’s up to you to continue supporting people you care about. Because they really need it to buy new kinds of chips and yogurt. Just a heads up, 2022 is going to be a big yogurt year. Try it out now at Truebill.com/YKS!

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Episode 258: The Crazy Episode Jul 04, 2022

Don’t miss this episode! Your old friends Mike and JF are back and they’re even wackier than ever before, due to probably a bunch of chemicals in our air and water and blood I’m guessing. On today’s show we got some evidence as to what happens when you ironically appreciate some evil stuff a little bit too much, when you unironically appreciate some other evil stuff way too much, and when you just straight up hate one single guy, who may or may not be evil, for unknown reasons. Believe it or not, every single time, it’s a Kickstarter project. Anyway, strap in and start hootin, cause it’s time for a wet and wild episode of YkS: ThE PoDcAsT!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.

YKS Premium. Many people are saying listening to the show will “cure all your diseases.” Do I endorse that view? Well, I’ll say this. I’m the guy who makes the show and, as far as I know, the guy I pay $200 to look at my knee and smell my breath once a year says I’m “mostly fine, considering”. So what does that tell ya?

This week’s episode is brought to you by these fine brands:

Schedule35 - Stop picking up a bunch of stuff off the forest floor and eating it to see if it helps you with anxiety! That’s got to have a pretty low success rate, I would think? And you probably eat a lot of leaf litter?? Schedule35 has figured out the good stuff to eat Get 15% off your order at schedule35.co with the promo code YKS!

HelloFresh - Food: It’s what’s for dinner! You ever drive down the road and see some restaurant and it’s named something like Eat N Stuff? What on Earth??? Who the hell is eating that mess? Not me. That’s cause I got HelloFresh. Get up to 16 free meals AND 3 free gifts at hellofresh.com/yourkickstartersucks16

Doctor Butlers - Look, I’m not gonna sugarcoat this, okay? Sometimes you got a problem “back there”. And you gotta take care of business. No messing around. Get the stuff that works on your butt. Use code YKS 20% off at DoctorButlers.com and quit foolin around with lesser pastes!

BetterHelp - This is your brain. This is your brain on therapy. For this visual aid to really workI would need two different eggs. And one of them is probably in somewhat worse shape than the other one. Unless the egg bit is copyrighted, in which case, I don’t know. It’s not eggs. It’s like, one egg. And a big bowl of worms. The point is, therapy is good for ya. Try it out, and get 10% off your first month at betterhelp.com/yks

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Episode 257: YKS AI Jun 27, 2022

Of all the universes in all the multiverses, THIS is the one you chose to portal us to?! The one with a brand new YKS dropping, and it’s about a bunch of crazy Kickstarters and stuff!? You better know what you’re doing, because if we don’t retrieve the Cube of Crowdfundium by the time Brendle’s Song plays…well, let’s just say you better hold on to your board games, buster! On today’s show, ah yes, it says right here in the scrolls, there was a really weird thing about car keys, a psycho copsucker app, oh my, and yes, this is the exact date they discussed the guy gluing a lighter to his cell phone! It’s just as was foretold…now hurry, back to The Webby. We might just have enough hyperfuel to bounce to the next cryptoworld…

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.

After an episode like this, they should really consider not doing any more of the show. And yet! The Adventures of YKS continue over at Patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks, where a nominal fee can secure you 5 bonus episodes, including weekly video, per month! W@W! L@@K!

This week’s episode of the program is brought to you by these fine ads. I mean sponsors.

Factor – Food. There ain’t nothing like it. I just wish it would cook itself. Well perhaps in some far off future, where we exchange space credits for nutritional films. For now, I suppose we will have to be satisfied with the healthful, convenient, and affordable offerings of Factor. Not a bad consolation if you ask me. Get $120 off with code yks120 at go.factor75.com/yks120 right now! Don’t wait until future times!

Backbone – Backbone is basically a magic wand that turns your phone into a gaming console. And you really don’t even need to know that much magic. I guess a little couldn’t hurt. Like the rabbit trick is good. Where in the hell…anyway, right now you can get an absolute boatload of free months – including Apple Arcade, Xbox Game Pass Ultimate, and more – with your purchase of a Backbone at playbackbone.com/yks

Honey – Now sure, we’ve doled out some great coupon codes here in this episode description. But what if you don’t have it handy? Well ok can you go get it? Ok. You can’t. Fine. That’s where Honey comes in. Honey: it’s free, and it helps you find coupon codes because that's where the coupon codes live. Download it! JoinHoney.com/yks

Diet Smoke – Sometimes (or maybe even all the time if you’re certain guys) the straight up full strength ganja out there might just have you saying “that’s tewwww spicey for me!” That’s where Diet Smoke comes in. Its Delta-8 gummies are sort of the, what was it, the bears with the different preferences? It’s the middle one. And that’s exactly what the doctor (some, maybe, in certain states, purely metaphorically?) ordered. Get 20% off – IN PERPETUITY!! – with code YKS20 at DietSmoke.com

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Episode 256: Crazy Lemon Jun 20, 2022

Dan's Bong had a Facebook page.

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.

For even more coverage of Dan's Bong Adventures, head on over to YKS Premium. That's basically what we're doing over there now, yeah.

Today's episode of YKS Premium is sponsored by these fine brands.

Schedule35 - Now I was always taught to not eat stuff that you found in the woods, on the ground. Come to find out, maybe if I had thrown that particular yoke off a bit earlier in life, I could have a better and deeper understanding of my self and environment etc? Guhh? Well that's what I read anyway. And with Schedule35, they picked the stuff up off the ground for you, and measured it and told you how much to take and stuff. And I bet they even washed the things, too. Sound too good to be true? Well, it ain't. Get 15% off your order at Schedule35.co with the promo code YKS.

Doctor Butlers - Hemorrhoids. It's one of those things you think, "Ok, there's no way somebody likes having this, right?" And of course you'd be wrong, cause it takes all kinds you know, but the spirit of what you're saying is true. It isn't, generally speaking, fun to have a bunch of ass pain. And Doctor Butler's gets that, which is why they have pretty much the best selling and reviewed butt cream out there. Go read the reviews for yourself, from a lot of people whose asses are better off for it. And now, you can save yourself 20% at DoctorButlers.com with the code YKS.

BetterHelp - Folks, having feelings in your brain is normal. But sometimes, just like with the ol' sock drawer, you gotta get in there and root around for a while to see if everything is still good. Toss the stuff out you ain't usin' anymore, match a few things up, organize. That's right, you didn't think I had anything for sock drawer = brain, but I did. And that success is probably, at least in part, due to therapy! Try it out for yourself and you'll be making good metaphors in no time. Get 10% off your first month at BetterHelp.com/YKS

Athletic Greens - Oh, I love my greens! But sometimes, they're just not very quaffable. That's where Athletic Greens, and it's seemingly innumerable amount of vitamins and adaptogens comes in. "Quaff This," it should say, somewhere on the can, but doesn't. That's ok. I'll keep quaffing this stuff. Join me, won't you? They'll even throw in 5 free travel packs and a year's supply of one of my favorite vitamins, D, at AthleticGreens.com/yks.

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Episode 255: Advice Crackers on Food Mountain Jun 13, 2022

Y'all! Come quick! Ol' Dan's got into the steamies again! On today's program -- and sorry if the episode description seems a little "catty". My cat is doing the thing where she reaches out her claw very slowly to slightly nick my finger skin so that it itches for the next 2 days. God I love animals soo much -- we've got a step by step recipe for Mike's special chili cleanse and god damn it she's doing it right now and it hurts why can't we just sit here and chill or maybe talk or whatever. Plus we've got the long-awaited reboot of fortune cookies, a lamp so stupid even Brick wouldn't love it, and a major leap in pet tech ok now she's laid her head down on the laptop edge which is super smart cause that doesn't have to close or anything right?? Ok enjoy the show I'm going to go stand up and have an animal get mad at me for doing it.

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.

Now that was a fine episode of YKS...My only suggestions would be: make it funnier, with a great guest, and shorter, and there's no ads in it, and nothing about Kickstarters, and make it video as well, and the video production has really taken a step up lately (cheers to Producer Dan), and the gimmick of it is incomprehensible, and everyone loves it and it costs money. Well, that's why they invented YKS Premium! Check out our most recent episode, with the inimitable Chris James, and two up and coming hosts in a special guest role!

This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

Schedule35 -- Mushrooms. Sure, they come from the earth. But what then? Well, scientists say a lot of good stuff can happen if you eat some of them. Problem is, which ones to eat. Well they figured that all out for you at Schedule35, where but a click of the mouse can have you opening up some nice mood altering substances as soon as the mail comes a few times. Try it now! And get 15% off at Schedule35.co when you use the code YKS at checkout.

Truebill -- Kick subscriptions int the ass...with Truebill! Check 'em out today at Truebill.com/YKS and give those pain in the rear end streaming services the boot. And hey, if you free up $5 or $8 bucks a month, you know who to toss it to! (Us. YKS. Come on pleaseeeee)

BetterHelp -- I'm burnt out as hell! I'm sick of this crap! That's something you might say if you are experiencing emotions, which can actually be a huge bummer, but you have to do it anyway. Point being, it's always good to "run ya thoughts" by somebody, and now thanks to BetterHelp, you can do it on the computer. Check it out, with the classic YKS 10% off, at BetterHelp.com/yks, to-day!

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Episode 254: Grape News Jun 06, 2022

YKS...what a pod. Man, there is no topic these guys won't touch. But would they touch a $50 bill inside the toilet, or a $10 on the seat? Well, they didn't talk about it on the show, so there's no answer in the 90-some minutes of content here. It's outside the bounds of the conversations, really. Actually, it's up to you to decide. Would Mike take the $50? Would JF play it safe with the tenner? Do either of them go to the bathroom after seeing the money? Was it a number one or a number two, anyway? Write that stuff down on a sheet of paper and turn it in with your parent/guardian's signature next week. And whoever gets it right, will get one sticker. Which I have to pay for, out of my own pocket by the way. Think about your answers while you hear the boys talk about indoctrinating children with crypto cartoons, new ways to wipe our asses, and new ways to wipe our teeth. Plus, a product they're already heavily advertising on Tiktok, so you know it's good! Out of the VIP club and into the poop hoop! It's a new YKS!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.

This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

NordVPN: 🌏 Exclusive! Grab the NordVPN deal ➼ https://nordvpn.com/YKS Try it risk-free now with a 30-day money-back guarantee! ✌Yoooooooooooo! That’s insane!!

BetterHelp: As a comedian, the stage is basically my therapist. But others may not be quite so lucky. Most people have to talk to licensed professionals with a variety of specialities. But where to find ‘em? Uhh, how about the computer! Get 10% off your first month at BetterHelp.com/YKS

HelloFresh: Micronutrients…macronutrients…vitamins…carbs? Ugh! So annoying to keep track of this stuff. If only there was something that combined it all into an easy to consume product. What if we came up with…food? Food…now food I could get into. Get up to 16 free meals and free shipping at HelloFresh.com/yourkickstartersucks16

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Episode 253: One Weird Trick May 30, 2022

Alright gang I'm gonna level with ya. I am sicker than I can remember being in years. I'm dictating this episode description to Siri from the toilet. And I think it's going pretty well so far. New incognito window. Crazy busty porno where it seems like everyone is enjoying themselves equally. Scan ahead 13 mins. Pause. Switch tabs. And so it's not gonna be the world's longest description, okay? It's just -- switch tabs scan through video back and forth pause, go back, add query "staff picks" -- not. I just ain't feelin' up to looking at such a big computer screen for more than, statistically speaking, 3-5 minutes. But yes on today's show you will hear about Mike passing on the bag, the proliferation of the lizard people, and honestly probably the most Kickstarters we've ever mentioned in one episode of the show. Now if you'll excuse me, I must be going. Close tab. Open new tab. Search will god forgive me. Delete. Search best burgers. Enter.

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.

Need more YKS? Head on over to the YKS Premium Patreon and sign up for it. That way, you can have it and hear it. Whenever you want! Like a warm blanket of two stupid guys.

This week's episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

Schedule35 - Use coke YKS for 15% off of some pretty dang discreetly packaged mushrooms, I must say.

NordVPN - 🌏 Exclusive! Grab the NordVPN deal ➼ https://nordvpn.com/YKS Try it risk-free now with a 30-day money-back guarantee! ✌ Cool cool cool.

Backbone.- Check em out at PlayBackbone.com/yks and get yourself one month FREE of Xbox Game Pass Ultimate, one month FREE of Apple Arcade, two months FREE of Google Stadia Pro, AND three months FREE of Discord Nitro. Hey that's a lot of free stuff.

Honey - Head on over to JoinHoney.com/YKS and start grabbin some savings...today!

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Episode 252: The One With The Two Guys Talking May 23, 2022

Straight from Jacko’s hyperbolic chamber…it’s the YKS boys! On today’s show we’re doing all kinds of fun shit. First you got this Mike guy, who knows a lot about the TV show Friends. Then you got this JF character, and whoaaa boy, look out for that guy. And when they both get the woke mind virus? Ah golly! Well, let’s just hope they had enough time to go over a crazy new hot box for your cats, a crypto tracker just in time for crypto’s great resurgence, and an app where you can ask someone to send you a picture of a hotel room before you book it. Heh. Something tells me there was plenty of time.

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.

YKS Premium…oh my god, I love it! That’s why I go to patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks, to sign up and then pay for it. It’s good to do this!

This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

Schedule35 - Now normally I hate having a schedule…but on the other hand, that stuff is straight up cool to have sometimes! And so, quite frankly, are microdoses of magic mushrooms. That’s why we turn to Schedule35. Use promo code YKS to get 15% off your order…hey man, have a nice trip!

Athletic Greens - “Good health begins at the gut.” - Unknown. This sounds like something someone has said at one point in time, doesn’t it? Imagine if it were a kind of cool font, and maybe it’s framed too. Or, like, stitched or something. And it’s in a kitchen? Wow. Anyway, Athletic Greens has an absolutely wild amount of vitamins in there, and it can go in your kitchen too. Hell, it’s in mine. Go to AthleticGreens.com/YKS for a nice little gift and to help out da show. And your gut!

Outer - Outdoors…you’ve heard of it. It’s the place where your computer isn’t. But still, it’s good to go there sometimes. And you go out there and you’re sitting on your milk crate and your table is one of those big electric spools, and you think…boy there’s got to be a better way! Well, there is, and it’s called Outer. Get $300 off at liveouter.com/yks and start outdoorsing the YKS Way!

BetterHelp - The human brain is a funny thing. But at times, it’s no laughing matter. Hey, don’t try to figure that out all on your own. Ask a pro for help and, you never know, maybe something cool will happen! Get 10% off your first month at BetterHelp.com/YKS.

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Episode 251: Constitution 2 May 16, 2022

Great news, everyone! We just found out we’ve been renewed for another 250 episodes! To celebrate, we’ve decided to bring back some of the classic YKS things you all loved so much, with a fun “Next 250 Episodes” twist. This week, you’ll enjoy a stupid piece of bathroom tech, some rebadged bulk dropshipped electronics, and a weird guy with ideas about how he could run the country. But THIS time, we will sound approximately 5 years older. And that’s just a taste of what we have in store for you all this time around. So if that sounds like the ride of a lifetime, slap that motherfuckin play button and let’s fast forward to our 40s baby!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.

YKS Premium – the ONLY place to double your YKS fun, every single damn week! Now with video! See if you can pause on the spliced in scenes of our balls!

This episode of YKS is brought to you by these fine brands:

Schedule35 - “Psilocybin”...the word on the tip of everybody’s tongue! Seems like it might be good for mental health, and like all stuff of that nature, Schedule35 ships quickly and discreetly! Figure out what microdosing means, and use code YKS to get 15% off your order. Oh, It means small dose. Yep. Makes sense.

AthleticGreens - Everyone forgets our humble guts. Sure we put food in there. But shouldn’t there be some other stuff that happens to it as well? The founder of Athletic Greens sure thought so. And before succumbing to “Vitamin Madness”, he developed the tasty and nutritious AG1 formula. Thank goodness! Check ‘em out at athleticgreens.com/YKS and get a year’s supply of Vitamin D and 5 free travel packs, on us.

Faherty - It’s springtime, guess I’ll just wear my shorts…wait a minute,all my shorts suck? And are ugly?? Well good thing Faherty is out there making their high quality and dare I say, rather handsome, shorts (and other stuff!) Grab some for yourself, with 20% off, at FahertyBrand.com/YKS.

BetterHelp - Therapy kicks ass. I’d rather go to it than do a bunch of other stuff…including make a podcast! But I find time for both, because they’re important. Anyway, maybe you should try it too. Therapy, not doing a podcast. That’s my thing. Lay the hell off my thing! Get 10% off your first month at BetterHelp.com/yks

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Episode 250: Cousin Jabba / Jimmy John’s Locker May 09, 2022

Two Hundred Fifty episodes. Now that's what I call a very significant milestone. Even though some of the episodes were reruns from YKS Premium. Oh yeah, and there are hundreds of YKS Premium episodes too. So is this really 250, when it's actually like 482? Yep. That's what the number says, so that's what it is.

On today's 250th episode, which is the number that it is, we're dealing with our 3 Foes, cooking toxins, and Mike's Little Freakout Pile. Plus we got a cool book for kids...who like motorcycles, a guy doing some 2007 style YouTube stuff...today, and yet another porch package device...with a twist! And a very special anniversary edition of Real or Fake.

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.

For ad-free versions of YKS and much more, head on over to patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. Just a straightforward plug. Nothing wrong with that sometimes. Not everything has to be a joke!

This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

Truebill - You know, I happen to cherish and love every one of my subscriptions equally. But I understand if you don’t. Maybe ya got tricked or flim flammed, I don’t know! Let TrueBill help sort ‘em out for you, at Truebill.com/YKS

Factor - I hate dinner! Why did I choose to cook it! Oh yeah…now thanks to Factor, I don’t have to. Click on this normal URL here: https://go.factor75.com/yks120 or use that code YKS120 for $120 off your order!

BetterHelp - I get by, with a little help, from myself…RT if you think that’s what the famous song SHOULD say! Gang, it stinks but sometimes you gotta get in there and do something nice for yourself. Sometimes it’s eating a big dagwood sandwich, and sometimes it’s going to therapy. We don’t have a cold cuts sponsor, so try out BetterHelp for 10% off your first month with the code YKS instead.

NordVPN - 🌏 Exclusive! Grab the NordVPN deal ➼ https://nordvpn.com/YKS Try it risk-free now with a 30-day money-back guarantee! ✌ I heard that!!

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Episode 249: He Admit it! May 02, 2022

Whether you’re driving in the car, folding your laundry at home, or simply falling asleep and hoping there’s not a super loud fart noise piped into the mix from totally out of nowhere, there’s no better podcast airing its 249th episode today than Your Kickstarter Sucks. On today’s program we lament the passing of Midwest Elvis, 86 our friend Mike Hale, and prove once and for all what the shape of Earth actually is.

I think I forgot to say that David sent that Kickstarter in, and I can’t really go back and add that into the show, but I wanted to say it here in case David reads the episode descriptions. The problem is that we are using a dark mode extension for Google Docs and it makes basically all the colors but white hard to read. And I put “From David” in a red text, but it showed up really dark red. So that is my bad on that one David and oh yeah by the way, the earth is flat so I shouldn’t have done the Kickstarter anyway.

Credits

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.

Did you guys see where a bunch of NFT apes got stolen or sold or faked or something? Something probably happened with the apes, I think? Well, that will NEVER happen when you subscribe to YKS Premium. Last week we talked with the wonderful Zoë Ligon, in a delightful episode many are calling “very pornographic”. This week, who knows, maybe we’ll have Elon Musk on! Wouldn’t that be funny as hell!

This week’s YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

Athletic Greens - Energy in the morning? Yes, it’s possible, thanks to the fine folks at Athletic Greens and their AG1 vitamin blend. And it tastes pretty good too, unlike “you know what”! Try it for your own self at AthleticGreens.com/YKS and get a free year’s supply of Vitamin D and travel packs as well.

HelloFresh - You know, in the old days, “getting fresh” with someone was NOT something to be proud of. Nowadays, “getting fresh” food is actually good! My, how times change. So change with them! Get up to 16 free meals plus free shipping when you use the code YourKickstarterSucks16 at HelloFresh!

Honey - Coupon codes are truly a double edged sword. The first edge of the sword is the saving money part. But the other edge, which is not as good, is the one where you have to REMEMBER the stinking things. Too hard! Download Honey to day at JoinHoney.com/YKS and kiss the bad edge of your swords goodbye!

NordVPN - “🌏 Exclusive! Grab the NordVPN deal ➼ https://nordvpn.com/YKS Try it risk-free now with a 30-day money-back guarantee! ✌” Yup. Nuff said.

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Episode 248: From Karen to Brandon Apr 25, 2022

Oh my god…That’s what you’ll be saying when you hear this week’s episode of YKS, which is so full of awesome content I almost decided to rename it The Awesome Content Show. That’s right, I almost unilaterally made the decision to change the name of the show I do as a full time(ish) job from something identifiable, descriptive, and established (if a little mean) to “The Awesome Content Show”, an honorific perhaps only as blasé as it is inscrutable! Just playing. But keep in mind I could change the name of this show at any fuckin’ time I want. On today’s show, we’re talkin melty clocks, rich guys reinventing the bus, and the ethics of using a marinade on your chicken. Plus we spill the tea on what it’s like being live show superstars, after our recent standing ovation (maybe? Couldn’t bear to look straight ahead) at Zanies with the Doughboys. Download it now, you 8-digited Cro-magnonite!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.

If YKS has a million fans I am one of them. If YKS has ten fans I am one of them. If YKS has only one fan, that is me. If YKS has no fans, that means I am no longer on Earth. For now, though, I am at YKS Premium.

And this week on the show: sex educator Zoë Ligon teaches us how to do all that good stuff. Ohhhhh!

This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

Birddogs - A couple weeks ago, if you had told me how much I’d love these pants with the underwear built into ‘em, I’d have said you were crazy. I mean, I already got underwear. What’s the point of putting it in the pants? Well, I don’t really know but I can tell you that my birddogs pants and shorts are now my everyday wear. I don’t know, man. They’re good! Try ‘em for yourself at Birddogs.com and get a free dad hat with the promo code YKS.

Outer - Outdoor furniture…well I’ve heard of indoor furniture, but what, now I gotta have a couch outside? Yep. Sorry. You are in the 2 couch lifestyle now. And while you’re here, why not make sure you got the best looking, most weather-resistant, and hell, probably the most sustainable outdoor couch on the block? Save yourself $300 and get free shipping, too, at LiveOuter.com/YKS.

BetterHelp - Stress stinks! Talking about stress with a qualified professional counselor? Now that’s what’s nice. Get 10% off your first month at BetterHelp.com/YKS

Diet Smoke - Ganja this, terpenes that. Hell, I don’t know, man. Just give me a nice little buzz that doesn’t turn me straight up wacky. That’s what they figured out with this Delta-8 stuff. And it works! Diet Smoke’s version, at least, tastes pretty good too. Give it a try, and get 20% off – forever! That’s right, keep on using the code, folks. They love it. Just head to DietSmoke.com, armed with the promo code YKS20. And slap it in there!

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Episode 247: Urber Eats Apr 18, 2022

Hoppy Easter, Everyone! Well, Easter, of course, was yesterday, and I’d love to tell you we did something special for the holiday, but honestly I don’t think either one of us knew it was coming up when we recorded it. So instead, I believe this episode will be our usual mix of whiny complaints about aging, nutting in a condom jokes, somebody farting, something you won’t hear because we had Dan cut it out at the last minute, and maybe 1 or 2 Kickstarters. There’s gonna be a couple ads on the regular episode, and none if you’re on the ad-free Patreon. Plus, we will make the world a better place due to our good deeds. Oh yeah and Mike sticks an easter egg up his ass.

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.

This episode of YKS is brought to you by these fine brands:

Faherty - A lifetime guarantee of quality…one thing you’ll get with Faherty’s fine clothing that you will never see anywhere close to YKS. But they can back it up! This stuff is hella nice. Get 20% off your next springtime piece at FahertyBrand.com/yks with the code YKS!

Diet Smoke - Folks, you know me. I am not the archetypal “Stoner God”. And yet, even a Cannabis Coward such as myself can handle the smooth, relaxing experience of Diet Smoke Delta-8 gummies. Celebrate 4/20 with 20% off your next legal high at DietSmoke.com and the code YKS20. And then keep the code + use it forever! It works!

Athletic Greens - I hate my gut! Why did I put all this crap in it! Well, maybe I should put some better stuff in it. Which is why I got Athletic Greens’ AG1: a killer mix of vitamins, minerals, and adaptogens that finally has me and my gut getting along again. Get a free 1 year supply of immune-supporting Vitamin D AND 5 FREE travel packs with your first purchase. All you have to do is visit Athleticgreens.com/YKS.

BetterHelp - Helping people kicks ass. But did you forget…you are a person, as well? Ah! Try helping yourself out, while someone else helps you out as well, at BetterHelp. And oh yeah, did we mention that the coupon code YKS helps you out as well, by getting you 10% off your first month at BetterHelp.com/YKS? Oh shoot, and it helps us out as well! Wow! That’s a lotta help!

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Episode 246: Bobby Laughs Apr 11, 2022

April showers bring….whaaaa? Shitty Kickstarters? Well that ain’t what I heard, but so be it! On today’s show, your friends Mike and JF show you a brand new world…a world in which viral posts existed before the normal-wheeled bicycle, the toilet has been perfected with a urine trebuchet, and your family never has to say goodbye to you because you will always be on a dinky little website (as long as the hosting fee gets paid). And that’s not all! Well, actually I guess it kind of is.

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.

Want more YKS? Well that’s why the Christian God invented YKS Premium! Last week the boys supported independent cinema by taking a trip to the theater and reviewing Morbius, and this week? Oh, brother…you’re just gonna have to join to find out!

This episode of YKS is brought to you by these fine brands:

Factor - Ah yes, meals. The famous thing we love to eat a few times per day. But oh, the hassle! Well with Factor, it’s downright simple. And not just the eating of the meals either, it’s the getting and fixing of them, too! Get $120 off at go.factor75.com/yks120

Honey - Paying full price is soooo cool NOT! That’s why we spend hours and hours searching for coupon codes. But it’s starting to take a toll on my life. That’s why I got Honey. Hey, maybe save yourself $12 off some sheets like JF did at JoinHoney.com/YKS

Truebill - So many services…not enough time! Gosh I’d love nothing more than to utilize all these different subscriptions, but it would honestly have to be my full time job. And, arguably, it is! But still. I’m gonna cancel some with Truebill. Join me, won’t you? Try Truebill out and tell ‘em YKS sent ya at Truebill.com/YKS

Athletic Greens - Improving my gut health, increasing my energy levels, absorbing a straight up respectable amount of adaptogens? You know, I’m starting to think Green really is my color! Nab a year’s supply of Vitamin D and 5 free travel packs at AthleticGreens.com/yks.

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Episode 245: HorseFlix Apr 04, 2022

Now this is interesting...says here on this card that this week’s episode of YKS goes out to the YKS discord and all of its perfect members, especially Drake and our close personal friend, Discord user Rob. Wow! Sounds like a real fine group of characters. I can only hope those folks like hearing about the Dadbod of Destiny, a brand new streaming platform for horse lovers, and a custom machine that can bulk-mix the world's 654th most popular cocktail on demand. Knowing them...heh...I'd bet anything they will.

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.

Put some YKS in your life! YKS Premium is the only place to get more Mike and JF unless you meet us in public and stab us in the bellies. Don't do that! Just head over to Patreon.com/yourkickstartersucksand toss us an $8 bill to get video of each and every premium episode delivered in the crispest HD your video card can handle.

This week's episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

HelloFresh - 16 free meals and 3 free gifts? Where in the HELL do I sign up? Simple. Go to HelloFresh.com/yourkickstartersucks16 and use that promo code yourkickstartersucks16. Then, simply sit back, relax, and Enjoy Da Grub(TM).

Athletic Greens Hey I tell ya what. I know so little about my body I used to think my gut was a part of my nervous system! But now I know better. Although with Athletic Greens AG1, it really doesn't matter. They're all getting the benefits of vitamins, adaptogens, etc. athleticgreens.com/YKS for a free 1 year supply of Vitamin D and 5 free travel packs.

BetterHelp You already know...hahaha...you already know. Kiss the uncomfortable waiting room goodbye, and trade it for a comfortable chatroom! Therapy...in a digital world. What'll they think of next? Oh yeah, discounts! Get 10% off your first month at BetterHelp.com/yks

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Episode 244: Dog Health Revolution Mar 28, 2022

“He ate the whole wheel of cheese. I’m not even mad.” - Unknown

Remember Sarah Palin? What was THAT all about, huh? She’s not in this episode at all really but I just saw something that reminded me of her and thought maybe you’d get a kick out of remembering her for a second as well. But if not, no worries, because you’re about to listen to about 90 minutes of pure nonsense from 2-3 bozos with barely anything going on. Today’s episode, for instance, features a Bitcoin wallet which is just a credit card, an idea that actually makes pizza bad somehow, and, incredibly, a Donald Trump RPG. That’s right folks, it’s episode 244, and that’s what’s going on. But that’s Monday for ya. Enjoy!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.

YKS Premium: The only way to become a guaranteed genius. Trying out some new marketing techniques on these plugs. First up: an inscrutable lie! Hey but in all seriousness gang, the overall experience of YKS Premium is banging, and there’s always more coming down the big stinky pipe. This week, we’ve got our much-ballyhooed mailbag dropping for our Squeeze Louise supporters, and that’s IN ADDITION to a Premium episode concept to be named later. Last week we previewed the Oscars with our friend Dan O’Sullivan…how’d we do? (smirk)

This week’s episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

Athletic Greens - Just when you thought they couldn’t make tropical-tasting stuff healthy, or vice versa…they went and invented Athletic Greens! A good tasting and good for you drink, now that’s nothing to shake a stick at. So put down the stick! And get your year supply of Vitamin D and 5 free travel packs at AthleticGreens.com/YKS

Outer - Outdoor furniture has a tough job. It’s gotta feel good when I sit on it, and also not freak out if it gets rained on. Well Outer has perfected that combination of traits, plus their stuff is modular as the day is long. And you’ll wish the day WAS longer when you’re sitting outside on your Outer furniture. Get a massive $300 off your order when you use the code YKS300 at LiveOuter.com/YKS!

BetterHelp - “Takin’ Care of Business, every day, oh yeah!” That’s what I’m thinking when I’m doing stuff around the house, taking care of the kiddos and pets, and helping my wife do whatever. And by the time the song stops, I ain’t got no time for my own self. Sad! But the folks at BetterHelp wanna help with that bit of relatable malaise, and you can try them right now with 10% off your first month at BetterHelp.com/YKS.

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Episode 243: Kiosk Krazy Mar 21, 2022

It’s Arts and Crafts Time, It’s Arts and Crafts Time…It’s time to make…this hat! On today’s show, appropriately enough, we are talking about the devilish ways of Nature’s Demons: Children, as JF has a showdown at the D&B Corral with the Token Ticket Coward. Also, ever wonder when we’re gonna get Capitalism II? Yeah, we did too. It’s so good. We invented it! Plus we got a tree that grows on your computer, a type of doll you can make whoopee with, and some real Iron Man tech if Tony Stark had like $56 instead of a million trillion. Spin your luck now! And download this shit!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.

Need more YKS? Yup, yup. Heard it a million times before. People want more YKS but they don’t know where to get it. Well how about this. Sign up for YKS Premium on Patreon and download all the extra episodes you want. Hey it’s only $5! Which is probably worth like $4 now a days. So who cares!

Oh yeah, and you can come see us LIVE at Zanies on April 20th when the Doughboys come to town! Grab your tickets here, but just a heads up you can only buy 8 per person. Sucks!

This week's episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine folks:

NordVPN You already know!!! You already know!! Get an exclusive discount and a month for free and a gift on top of it all at NordVPN.com/YKS or when you use the code YKS at checkout.

Faherty - Go JF Style on the sweater game with Faherty and shove it in everyone’s face who said you didn’t have nice sweaters and couldn’t pick out a nice sweater if your life depended on it. Get 20% off your order at FahertyBrand.com when you use promo code YKS at checkout.

Diet Smoke - Hey maaaaan, wanna get high? Statistically speaking, your answer to this question is most likely, “yes”. But sometimes we just can’t afford to go to the damn moon. We got stuff to do later! That’s where Diet Smoke comes in. A reasonable (and legal!) high that tastes like candy. Folks we’re in Jetsons territory here. Use code YKS20 at checkout for 20% off your order at DietSmoke.com – and then keep on using it. YKS20 is good forever!

Honey - Now I’ve done a good job listing the discount codes we’d like for you to use up there. But the truth is, not everyone is so good at getting the word out. That’s why they invented Honey – let the cute little app go lookin’, so you don’t have to. He needs something to do! Download Honey now for free at JoinHoney.com/YKS and start finding your discounts today.

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Episode 242: Laughter's My Way Mar 14, 2022

Daylight Savings WHAAA? The clock may be going totally wacko, but the calendar, my friends...well, the calendar is staying on point! Another Monday has appeared, and it's time to post the episode of YKS we all will love to listen to. Now is the point, of course, at which we all realize that JF has left his notes for the episode downstairs and doesn't want to go get them so we're gonna have to figure this out on our own. Folks, on today's show we've got a candle device that even Mike won't use, a hilarious TV show, or channel, or something, that's going to save Earth, and a new speaker idea that I wouldn't even play Justin Bieber's latest album on. Wow! We did it! And I didn't even have to go downstairs! Nice work everyone.

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.

Oh Hello Dearie! Well, you'll be wanting to hear more YKS now then, won't you? My, my my. I suppose you'll need to head on over to the YKS Premium Patreon then, won't you?

This week's episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine folks:

NordVPN - The internet is the door of entertainment...and all you need is the key. That's where NordVPN comes in. It's the key to the thing I said earlier. Get a deal that'll make your ISP blush at NordVPN.com/YKS

TrueBill - Sure, we've all heard of BrewTill, the place where we pony up for IPAs and Dobbelbocks and so forth. But TrueBill? The new app saving their members millions?? Absolutely. And in some ways, it's arguably more real than the other thing I said. Get yourself started at Truebill.com/YKS

Factor - Healthy eating is great, and so is getting mail, but who has the time anymore, much less the genius to combine those two things into one fabulous enterprise? Well the answer to the first part is you, and the answer to the 2nd part is Factor. But one doesn't really make sense without the other. I structured it like a weird riddle, sorry. Enjoy $120 off at go.factor75.com/yks120

BetterHelp - Therapy...it's that thing that makes you go "Oh yeah. Good idea." But you know, you get in the car, you drive around, and you end up back home again. What the heck! Driving the car is too hard. That's why BetterHelp is bringing the therapy to the computer world: where we all live! Yaaay! Get 10% off your first month at Betterhelp.com/yks

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Episode 241: The Chicken Thigh Parable Mar 07, 2022

Whether you love a big piece of milk, having lots of Jameses, or the classic "kill your fuckin self game", Episode 241 of the Your Kickstarter Sucks Podcast is sure to please. Sorry I just watched The Meg and it was so good that I put off writing this episode description for too long and I had to go into SEO mode. We really could have done multiple Turteltaubs for Jesseuary! The guy knows what we like...when you think you have the big shark but then another, bigger shark comes along and eats you and the original big shark. Incredible stuff. Plus we got two Llama games on the show, which is more than usual. And really, many would say, two too many. To hell with them!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.

YKS Premium! That's the place to get more YKS, if you've "prestiged" out of the currently available episodes. Or, hell, just want to support a boy and his dream to annoy his friend by making him talk about toilet scrubbers every week. Jesseuary has come and gone, but an outrageous amount of bonus content awaits you behind Patreon's velvet ropes: collaborations with our friends from Blocked Party, Hollywood Handbook, Doughboys, and more. And better yet, we get absolutely crazy and sick nasty with it. Check it out.

This episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine brands:

HelloFresh -- You already know what time it is! It's time to get meals...delivered to your house...and then you cook them? HelloFresh, you are crazy for this one! But it's just crazy enough to work...Hey, call my bluff with up to 16 free meals at HelloFresh.com/yks.

Athletic Greens -- Healthy and tasty...yeah I think those are called opposites! Well, with Athletic Greens, opposites attract. You got your vitamins, minerals, the whole shebang in here, and it tastes good to boot. And no, it's not boot flavored! Get 5 free travel packs of AG1 plus a year's supply of Vitamin D at AthleticGreens.com/YKS.

NordVPN -- Just when you thought tech couldn't get any more bada$$...they come out with NordVPN. Get a yoooge discount off your plan plus a bonus month and a gift at NordVPN.com/yks. How can you afford not to do this? Seriously! I'm asking!

BetterHelp -- Taking care of yourself mentally...now that's what I call a baller attitude towards self care. Kiss the uncomfortable waiting room goodbye (not literally because of covid, of course) and get 10% off your first month of affordable and private online therapy at BetterHelp.com/yks.

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Episode 240: False Alf Feb 28, 2022

Welcome to iPodcast, the very first podcast for your phone!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.

You've heard all about it, you've read the articles, you've seen the awards. And now, Jesseuary is wrapping up over at the YKS Premium Patreon. We've got great guests, incredible games, and wall to wall analysis of some of Cinema's most overlooked films. The only problem is, there's no way to hear it! Oh wait a minute, what the HELL am I talking about? All you have to do is type in Patreon.com/YourKickstarterSucks or better yet, click that damn link, and be whisked away to the payment portal where we will ask but a humble $5 for years and years of content. Lock in at our $8 Squeeze Louise tier for even MORE bonus episodes, including this week's Jesseuary finale, featuring the boys from Podcast The Ride and The Sorcerer's Apprentice!

Today's episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine folks:

NordVPN! Where my tech heads at! If you love tech like we do, you already know the benefits of a VPN. But lemme toss everyone else a hint: it's Very imPortant and Nice! Get it?? Good. Head over to NordVPN.com/YKS and use that code YKS for a Huge Discount off your NordVPN Plan + 1 additional month for free + a bonus gift!

Athletic Greens! "Ohhhh I HATE having good gut health!" - That's what we all sounded like in our 20s, every single one of us, without exception. But gang, the truth of the matter is, we gotta get our butts in gear here, and of course our butts start right up in the stomach area (not a doctor). Give yourself the dadgum vitamins and so forth you need every day, with 5 free travel packs and a year supply of Vitamin D, at AthleticGreens.com/YKS

Codecademy! Wow, tech heads, our cup really runneth over this week. You know I've been meaning to learn how to actually work a computer instead of just clicking around on the stupid thing. Whether it's Ruby, Python, or even the classic HTML, the computer uses a variety of languages that aren't English to communicate its wants and needs. Uncover its many mysteries today by learning to speak your laptop's native tongue! Use promo code YKS to get 15% off Codecademy Pro, the best way to learn to code!

BetterHelp! I recently heard 99.99% of the American workforce is work from home now, so why not work...on yourself...from home? Makes sense, right? Well I don't know, I'm just riffing. But if you'd like to talk to someone who can actually tell you if stuff makes sense or not, check out BetterHelp.com/YKS and get 10% off your first month of "helping me figure out if this stuff makes sense".

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Episode 239: Taking a Walk On The Far Side Feb 17, 2022

Wow! It's already Episode 239, what a milestone! To celebrate the momentous occasion, we decided to do something different...we made this one funny. That's right, we packed this baby to the brim with jokes, goofs, gaffes, and gags, and if you don't double over laughing out of both ends by the time this one is through, we will refund you every damn dollar you've ever paid to listen to our (free episodes only, and actually not even those) show. On this week's episode, we two G.U.Y.s come up with some new twists on classic comics, smell a mummy, and meet a new friend, Mr. $10,000! Plus we got the latest Superman flick (looks good!), a novel way to deal with little buggy guys, and the most politically confusing BBQ sauce we've ever seen. All that and more, again free of charge so no one can get too mad about it, only on YKS!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.

***W@W! L@@K! Jesseuary continues over at YKS Premium! Who ya gonna call? Well, this Friday it'll be our friend from Secret Base, Kofie Yeboah, answering the call, and we'll be talking all about the one Ghostbusters movie everyone can agree pissed the most people off. Except me! I loved it.***

Today's episode of YKS is sponsored by these fine folks:

Athletic Greens AG1Ah! I love the smell of adaptogens in the morning. And AG1 is the best (maybe only, as far as I know) way to get em into a tasty green powder. Plus it's gonna run ya less than 3 bucks a day to get all those vitamins our body is obsessed with for some reason. 3 bucks, what's that...you probably spend that on tissues and paper clips. Make the switch and get a 1 year supply of Vitamin D AND 5 FREE travel packs with your first purchase at AthleticGreens.com/YKS.

Honey! The coupon code field at checkout...it can be your friend or your foe. And at the end of the day, it's really up to them. But if you need an ally in battle, and also the spoils of victory are something like getting $12 off a cool hat, then I think you should link up with our friends at Honey. Try 'em out now at JoinHoney.com/YKS and send that coupon code field back to hell!

HelloFresh! We all know the feeling...eating food?? Again??? Good god, man. I just did that yesterday! Well, look, it may be kind of annoying to take care of yourself and whatnot, but if there's an easier way to get some pretty good tasting and fresh food in your hole than HelloFresh I don't know about it. Get up to 16 free meals by going to HelloFresh.com/YourKickstarterSucks16 and eat some broccoli and stuff. It's good.

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Episode 238: Unwashed Sith Lord Feb 14, 2022

Well well well, if it isn't the thing I'm doing while the Super Bowl is on in the background...the episode description! On today's show we're smoking on that Grandma Weed, planning out the forthcoming Willisbember, and telling Deer Park where they can shove their so-called "shitty ass water bottle caps". Plus, we got a way to make drinking booze straight out of the bottle feel even grosser, a way to make smoking weed extremely uncool, and a way to make folding socks, uh, exactly as fun as it already was. How do they do it, folks? Through the power of Jesus Christ! Just kidding. It's from freakin $6 coffee that tastes like shit and has 4000000mg of sugar in it!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.

Do something nice for yourself this Valentine's Day...subscribe to YKS Premium! Jesseuary has yet to disappoint, and if it has, I don't know about it because I refuse to listen to criticism! This week on the show we welcome first time guest Griffin Newman to the program and pray to God he likes the best movie we've ever done for Jesseuary: Edge of Tomorrow! This is one day you won't mind repeating, so head over to Patreon today and drop $5 on it!

This episode of YKS is brought to you by the following BELOVED sponsors:

NordVPN! The internet just ain't the internet without NordVPN. Go to NordVPN.com/YKS for a free month and gift, courtesy of your friends Mike and JF. And also the NordVPN guys but we had 'em put a special "Mike and JF" stank on it. Enjoy.

Truebill! Is your ex still paying for your Netflix? Well, it's that special day for lovers, so I don't know. Maybe something good will happen? Let 'em do it for like one more day, just to be sure, and then head over to Truebill.com/yks to get those subscriptions under control.

Factor! Now you know me gang, I love to put food in my mouth. But what if it was healthy? Could that work? Well, Factor thinks it can. And I gotta say, they hit the nail on the head with this stuff. I gotta get more of those Keto shakes, good golly! Try those and a lot more awesome grub, plus get $120 off at go.FACTOR75.com/yks120

BetterHelp! We hate waiting rooms so much. They make us sick to our very stomachs! And BetterHelp decided, you know what, we hate those freakin' things too. Get 'em outta here! So they did. Get 10% off your first month of the future of counseling at betterhelp.com/yks

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Episode 237: Don't Click on the Website Feb 07, 2022

Listen up dirtbags! It's time for another YKS. Oh yeah and by the way, you aren't dirtbags. You're actually the closest things we have to friends! And you mean a lot to us, you fucking dirtbags! Fuck you! On today's show, which must have been pretty funny because I did not have time to write down what was going on while we were recording it, we've got a NEW way of signing your name that doesn't make you look like an uneducated oaf, a $200 shoe you can never hoop in, somehow another poker thing, and the latest from the guy who came up with throwing the burrito around and whatever the blowing up kittens game is. Sounds like it was probably around a B+ episode, maybe less. Not bad!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.

Good news, everyone! (Futurama) Jesseuary continues over at YKS Premium! This week, we've got our friend Libby Watson on to solve the mysterious case of...some other Watson?? That's right, 221b Baker Street is getting YKS-ified as we take on Guy Ritchie's Sherlock Holmes! Get the video of all our Jesseuary eps, so you can see Mike getting mad at the progressively longer theme songs I make to annoy him, on Patreon.

Check out Libby's indispensable healthcare newsletter at Sicknote.co. Indispensable would be a good name for it if she ever wants to change it up. But she probably won't...

Today's YKS is sponsored by these fine folks:

NordVPN - Damn! The computer has no freakin' idea what country I'm in. And it's all thanks to NordVPN, our partners in the world of making the computer think you're in a different place than what you are. Check 'em out at nordvpn.com/YKS or use the code YKS to get a Huge Discount off your NordVPN Plan + 1 additional month for free!

HelloFresh - I've heard of acting fresh...but EATING fresh? Well I reckon there's a first time for everything. Or in this case, maybe 16 first times....wink! What the HELL am I talking about? Well why don't ya mosey on over to hellofresh.com/yourkickstartersucks16 for up to 16 free meals and 3 free gifts to find out...

Codecademy - Ya know, I've always wanted to improve myself. But actually that's like really hard and stuff so I probably won't. What I can do, however, is learn a new skill...like programming! And when I do, I'll use promo code YKS at Codecademy.com to get 15% off Codecademy Pro, the ONLY way to code!

BetterHelp - Mental health...100%. That's what you wanna see on the health bar gang. Promo code YKS will get you 10% off your first month so dump it in there at BetterHelp.com/YKS and kiss your brain for us!

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Episode 236: Let's Joe Brandon Donuts Jan 31, 2022

Somebody said "There's a new episode of YKS!" lol. lmao.

On today's show we're going full on Parent Mode with a look at a Christian comic book hero that could finally save the day, a new game of poker that might be able to do the same thing, and of course, some tarot cards with Eminem on them. Right twix...left twix...it really don't matter which side you're on, as long as you're armed with the shield of truth, the knowledge of how to make a website, and some vitamins you can drink. Hell, I don't know if you're gonna like it or not but at least there's some C-3PO in it. It's a new YKS!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.

Say it with me now: It's Jesseuary time! That's right, gang. Our annual celebration of the best/worst Hollywood has to offer has begun, and the only place to get it is at YKS Premium. This week we're joined by our friends Tom Walker and Demi Lardner of bigsofttitty.png, and we're watchin' The Mummy (2017)! Head on over to Redbox and grab a copy, then subscribe to YKS Premium. Oh yeah, and we'll bring the popcorn! (I actually don't like popcorn that much but I'll have like 4 bites of yours if that's ok).

Today's episode of YKS is sponsored by Athletic Greens AG1. Wow! There's so many dadgum vitamins and adaptogens in this sucker I gotta wonder if Dr. Jeykll himself invented it! But this stuff won't turn you into a monster...it'll give you some energy and help your guts. Not bad. Hey Russell Crowe, check this mess out. In fact, whether you're a membe 30 Odd Foot Of Grunts or not, you can get 1 a year supply of immune-supporting Vitamin D AND 5 travel packs of AG1 with your first purchase with our promo code. Check it out at AthleticGreens.com/YKS

Also sponsoring this week's show: Codecademy. You know that thing you look at your damn emails on every day? Yeah, the one with all the crazy posts? Well turns out there's folks out there what know how to make it "get up and go!" And you can too. Whether it's python, java, or any of the other good computer languages to know, Codecademy is the place to learn 'em. Get 15% off your Codecademy Pro membership when you go to Codecademy.com and use promo code YKS. Right now!!

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Episode 235: The Cableman's Lament Jan 24, 2022

Look to your right. Look to your left. Both of the people sitting next to you are Jon Voight, and they are both doing the most insane accent you've ever heard in your life. That's what these teachers in our woke schools want these days, and the Demonrat politicians are just cowardly enough to give it to them! Now what on God's green earth could I be talking about? There's only one way to find out. You're gonna have to go Blair Witch Mode and grab a Sausage McMuckin, and oh my God I just got a "too many characters" warning in this episode description box hahaha. This shit is long as hell (I wrote it in reverse order). Bye

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.

Now folks, I won't presume to tell you what to do with your own money. But from time time, it's been asked, "Where do I go to get more YKS?" [citation needed] And by god, the only place I've ever found any more of the stuff is over at Patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. Bummer, right? Believe me, if there were another way to go about it, I'd be the FIRST one to tell you. But right now, as it stands, any YKS fan in need of a few extra laughs simply must pony up a nominal amount of dough for access to YKS Premium.

This week's YKS is sponsored by Truebill. I've been seeing these commercials lately, and the guy who came up with Truebill says he hasn't looked at his credit card bill in a long time. Well he's probably pretty busy and honestly ya know what, they do put a lot of lines on there with all the numbers and crap. Who knows what's on there! That's somebody else's problem. Tell ya what, if you'd like to save a few bucks without the hassle of the whole envelope rigamarole, check 'em out at Truebill.com/YKS.

Also hookin it up BIG TIME on this episode? Athletic Greens! You know how I feel about tropical flavors. I am absolutely wild for them, whether it's in my cup or in my mouth. And when those AG1 adaptogens go to town on my gut health...that's when I know it's time to take on my to-do list (normally it's like, eat some lunch or something). Put your guts on notice and get a year's supply of Vitamin D and 5 free travel packs of AG1 at AthleticGreens.com/YKS.

Finally, this portion of the episode description bloc just wouldn't be this portion of the episode description bloc without BetterHelp. You know, I think it would look kinda cool if they stylized it like this: betterhelp. Just kind of a casual way of doing it. Research indicates this would appeal to...millennials. Or whatever the good one is now. But that's above my pay grade quite honestly and I'm just the amazingly talented, charismatic ad copy in the episode description bloc guy. And now for my speciality, the call to action. Try betterhelp out today and get 10% off your first month at Betterhelp.com/YKS.

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Episode 234: The Bedsheet's Wife's Hitman's Bodyguard Jan 17, 2022

On this week's YKS, we attempt to reconstruct what the show was about despite apparently throwing away the show notes, or maybe never even writing anything down in the first place. Oh wait. That's what I'm doing right NOW!!! Well if you go back and look at the sheet we write out before recording, it looks like we revisited the perfect work-from-home Kickstarter with fresh eyes, which I thought was a smart angle for this. And then we do 6 Kickstarters of course. There's a nasty game for nerds on there, there's a Trump thing, a scam, and a useless niche product designed by a space alien. Plus, we decide what kind of store we would be if we were going to be a store. Dollars to donuts there's some good riffs in here too...but don't take my word for it. Listen to my words! Of it! (By downloading the show now.)

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.

For more YKS, head on over to the YKS Premium Patreon. That's basically where we do all kinds of crazy cool stuff and go nutty with it. Also there's no ads, which is a great thing or a bad thing depending on who you ask. Probably the more important thing is the hundreds of hours of bonus content and dozens (so far!) of video episodes which will just damn fall into your damn lap once you fork over the cash. Wow...listening stuff and now seeing stuff as well...YKS Premium is truly a feast for the senses!

This week's YKS is sponsored by Manscaped. Help your penis look better for Valentime's Day with Manscaped. Get 20% off plus free shipping when you use our code YKS 20. When you do that, you're supporting the show and your penis. So imagine the meme from Predator with the two guy shaking hands, and one of them says Penis and the other one says YKS and then in the middle it says Support. Or maybe it says YKS20. Whichever you want. Just send me the meme and I'll look at it and let you know.

Listen to your favorite podcast and cook up tasty, easy-to-prep meals! That's what it says on the website for HelloFresh when you click on it. And hell, I'm inclined to agree. The only thing that would make it better is getting up to 15 free meals and 2 free gifts. But you already know that since I'm there, it's actually gonna be 16 free meals and 3 free gifts with the code yourkickstartersucks16. Wow! I made them offer the deal!

Well if you know me, you know I'm always thinking about my gut health. But I hate munching big handful of vit of mins. Drinking some good tasting green water though? Yeah I can handle that. And so can you, probably, with Athletic Greens. Get a year's supply of Vitamin D and 5 travel packs at AthleticGreens.com/YKS.

Finally, YKS is sponsored -- and joined in the Coupon Code Wars -- by Honey. Between the money they saved me on my latest jersey purchase, and my love for a recently in the public domain cartoon bear, there's just no one else I trust in the coupon code field more than Honey. Check 'em out at JoinHoney.com/YKS, save some cash, and buy yourself a nice red shirt with no shorts underneath. They can't stop ya!

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Episode 233: Junk Man vs The Anytizers Jan 10, 2022

Neither snow nor rain nor heat nor gloom of night stays these podcasters from the swift completion of their appointed episodes! Just playing. If there was a bunch of heat or gloom we probably wouldn't do it. But there was a shitload of snow by Tennessee standards, and we still managed to turn on the computer and do our jobs. Incredible. On today's episode we're talking about, well, that dadgum post office demon Louis Dejoy, new seating concepts, copsucking comics, and as you can probably guess by looking at the title of the episode, air fryer apologia. All that and more on a very normal episode of YKS!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.

For more YKS, yeahhhh, you're gonna wanna head over to YKS Premium. Jesseuary is starting to take shape, and you're gonna love it, but in the mean time, we got bonus episodes comin out the wazoo over there, and they are ready to download! Plus, our migration to YouTube is now complete, and your YKS Premium Video experience is smoother and more Googlier than ever before. Put the boys up on the big screen! Only at YKS Premium.

This week's YKS is sponsored by Factor. Granted, I live smack dab in the middle of flyover country, but I gotta say, when I sat down to lunch this week, Factor's Shrimp and Grits acquitted themselves pretty dadgum well. Only thing that was missing was a big fluffy beignet! Well that's because Factor is all about nutritious, pre-prepared meals ready to munch in about 2 minutes. Keto? Ke-yes! Order yourself a few weeks worth of nice hot lunches at go.factor75.com/plans and use code YKS120 for $120 off.

Also sponsoring this week's episode? You already know what time it is. It's time to call or otherwise virtually interact with your licensed professional therapist in a safe, convenient, and comfortable environment! Get 10% off your first month at BetterHelp.com/YKS.

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Episode 232: The First Episode of 2022 Jan 03, 2022

The first episode of 2022.

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.

For more YKS, you're gonna want to download YKS Premium over on Patreon. This past month, YKS Premium listeners got some real treats as we released some heretofore paywalled crossover episodes with professional podcasts Howell Dawdy's Fast Track and The P.O.D. Kast. But now it's back to the YKS slop. Join us for more Kickstarters, more goofin' off, more lines of resolution, and well, more. Five bucks, Eight bucks, whatever ya got, as long as it's one of those two amounts of bucks, you're gonna get some content. Join the familia of YKS Premium.

This week's episode of YKS is sponsored by HelloFresh. Holy guacamole, they got some good food there. And heck, maybe they've even got some of that guacamole I just mentioned a second ago. But don't worry, eating these avocados won't keep ya from getting a house. That's because they're FREE! As long as you use the promo code yourkickstartersucks16, you're gonna get 16 free meals plus 3 free gifts at HelloFresh.com. 16 free meals...now that's what I call "an avocado-based dip, spread, or salad first developed in Mexico.[3] In addition to its use in modern Mexican cuisine, it has become part of international and American cuisine as a dip, condiment and salad ingredient"!

On top of that, we've got our friends over at BetterHelp pitchin' in today. Hey thanks gang. I tell ya what's nice...getting a helping hand. Whether it's an alley-oop slam dunk for the swish slam...Two Points! Or something else, like a personal problem I guess. Or if you're depressed? But it's not about basketball for some reason? You can always ring up BetterHelp. Try 'em today and get 10% off your first month at BetterHelp.com/yks. Score!

And finally, it's Truebill! Something I just thought of: Truebill implies the existence of a Falsebill. Or Falsehillary. Whatever, talk about it in your joke workshop group dm. Point is, subscriptions you don't want anymore are a real pain in the keister. And you look at the credit card bill and it's all 1s and 0s and god knows what. Let's call in the experts. Let's get the commandos from Aliens in there, searching out all your unwanted subscriptions and eliminating them with extreme prejudice. Ok well they all died so we're gonna go with Truebill. But it'll be sick, I promise. Check it out for yourself at Truebill.com/YKS and save some money...and the galaxy!

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UNLOCKED: YKS Premium S15E3: Elvis Hour with Tim Kalpakis Dec 27, 2021

Oppa still on Christmas Vacation style! The boys are back at it again with some YKS Premium Freemium content: an unearthed, probably-new-to-you classic, our interview (?) and Bloody Mary sesh with Birthday and Sloppy Boy Tim Kalpakis. Oh yeah, and there's a little bit extra from your boys thrown in there to sweeten the pot. Actually I just looked and it's like 30 extra minutes. We could have just done a new episode. Oh well. Pour 'em up and enjoy the show!

And when you're done, click here to say why it's total bs we didn't do 30 more measly minutes to justify an all-new ep this week: Patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks

Look into the mirror, say "funny guest" three times, and what will appear? Writer and comedian Tim Kalpakis, of the Birthday Boys and Sloppy Boys, that's who! Tim pours us a couple of Bloody Marys and talks about some of our favorite topics: Bar Rescue, getting an MRI, and why Mike Mitchell is everybody's favorite. Plus, you know we had to get a former SNL writer (Lorne.) to help us punch up some JokeBlogger jokes! This is one hell of an ep, so pull up your barf bucket and get ready to laugh!

Check out the Sloppy Boys podcast wherever you get your shit, and support them on Patreon for even more classic Sloppy Boys content.

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UNLOCKED: YKS Premium S17E04: Miketober S2E4: The Stuff with The Doughboys Dec 20, 2021

Oppa Christmas Vacation Style! We're taking a week off, but still couldn't let ya leave empty handed...so allow us to introduce, from behind the paywall, an absolute banger of an episode from this past Miketober. It's The Stuff with our friends the Doughboys! Wiger and Mitch join us for a classic rewatch of a scary marshmallow movie, guess some ice cream flavors (pretty badly if I recall), and much more. For new listeners, enjoy this episode ad-free and the rest of Miketober over at Patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks, and for those of you who have already heard this crap and hate our guts, please enjoy an all-new intro, outro, and yes, everyone's favorite part, advertisements.

Music for Miketober is courtesy of Craig Dickman and Jesse Farrar. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Exec Producer lola butt. Ads time!

Well gang, since I'm one of those guys who can barely remember to zip up his fly on the way out the door, you know I ain't memorizing all 5,678 of my passwords. You know what I'm talking about? Well, good news on that front. No they didn't invent a new pill to fix our brain problems, but they did invent NordPass. That's just as good! And a hell of a lot cheaper, thanks to our sponsor: NordPass. Christmas is coming! It doesn't matter whether you've been naughty or nice, you still get 70% off NordPass Premium at NordPass.com/YKS or use a code yks. Plus you get an additional month for FREE!

Also sponsoring today's show, it's BetterHelp. Welp! It's that time of year again...the time therapists call "the moneymaker". Yeah, it's getting pretty dark outside, but inside our brains, let's light up some dopamine receptors, take a page out of Pharrell's book, and become "happy" whilst talking to some licensed professional counselors. Ohhh baby! Now that's what I call, good to do. Get 10% your first month at BetterHelp.com/YKS.

Finally, you gotta give it up for the HelloFresh crew. 14 free meals, that sounds like me at Thanksgiving/Christmas/etc. Probably not Easter because honest to god who cares about Easter meals? Not me, and not HelloFresh. We won't be eating at Easter! Pass it on! And then, go to HelloFresh.com/yourkickstartersucks14 and use code yourkickstartersucks14 for up to 14 free meals AND 3 free gifts! I just found a piece of dark chocolate sitting half melted on my trackpad. I really hope your gifts are better than that! It better be a new car!

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Episode 231: GutKiller Base Dec 13, 2021

Live from Nashville, Tennessee, it's YKS! That really could be what they're saying some day. Until then, of course, we simply have to march around our homes and say it ourselves. We have to say it to ourselves, to our pets, and we have to say it to the car warranty people who call us and make their phone numbers look like ours by borrowing the first 7 digits! But hopefully, someday, we can all know peace...when Mike and JF are the most famous people on the planet. But today is just as good! Because we've got an episode that hits all the big marks: The JF Position, living the Cone Life, and our worst xmas gifts. Plus, we're changing the sweeping paradigm with extreme advances in new combinatorial technology, solving the popcorn car problem once and for all, and finally figuring out how the hell freelancers are supposed to sit down. And not a moment too soon! I haven't gotten a W-2 form in like 7 years. My back hurts!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.

We (clap) are (clap) Having (clap) doing (clap) bonus (clap)! Sorry the claps messed me up. For ad-free episodes, video eps, bonus mailbags and more, subscribe to YKS Premium on Patreon. And hey, a discounted annual sub would make a great holiday gift! For yourself, though. I don't think you can actually gift subs on there yet. I'm not in charge of that though!

This week's YKS is sponsored by Honey. When it comes to a little guy who lives in your browser that knows coupon codes, I don't think anybody is doing it quite like Honey.Scratch this little feller on the chin, save a few bucks, and get that pesky holiday shopping out of the way all in one fell swoop. Wow, that's once nice swoop! Try em out for yourself: JoinHoney.com/YKS

Also sponsoring today's episode is BetterHelp. Give uncomfortable waiting rooms the double bird and talk to a pro, plus get 10% off your first month at BetterHelp.com/YKS.

Finally, Episode 231 of YKS, that's right, this one, is brought to you by the dong wizards over at Manscaped. Check this out: Wouldn't it be nice to shave your privates, then the hair down there wouldn't be so long. Everybody knows what song that's a parody of, but we can't say it! That's the wacky US legal code for ya. Anyway, use code YKS20 for 20% off your order plus free shipping. Or pay full freight, up to you (easy choice)!

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Episode 230: The Discount King Is Here! Dec 06, 2021

Hear ye, hear ye! Well if it's anything like his last album, I think I'll pass! On today's programme, we're thumbing through Area Woman Magazine to read up on some Life Pro Tips, and we'll be talking about the guys I don't look like, which believe it or not, are all the wild and crazy and strange looking guys throughout history. Plus, we've got an update on using your balls like a penis, the shower routines of people who don't know how to shower, and finally figure out the right way to make a bicycle move around (shoot it??) It's one hell of a show, and I'm not just saying that because my livelihood depends on lots of people listening to it. I actually think it's good! And you can believe that because if you don't, Santa isn't coming this year. That's right...no presents!! And we LIKE those!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.

For a present you get yourself with no moral judgement from some omniscient (unelected!) arbiter, try YKS Premium. Wow, I wonder what's over there? Oh my god...is it bonus episodes of YKS, with video, and access to our Discord, and a bunch of other crazy crap? Yep. Probably so. And there's a mystery for you to solve over there too. Let us know if you solved the mystery. YKS Premium: Solve The Mystery.

This week's YKS is sponsored by HelloFresh. Knock Knock, it's meals for you to eat! Duh!!! Get your fork, spoon, and all that other stuff you love so much and put it on a table or tray. Then, do all the other stuff you have to do to eat food. Then, simply eat the food. It's just that easy. If you wanna try it yourself, there ain't no better website to do it on besides HelloFresh.com/YourKickstarterSucks14 -- That's where you're gonna get your 14 free meals and free shipping, alright? HelloFresh. Just add forks.

Also bringing you this week's episode: BetterHelp. Sick of waiting rooms? You know all the kind of stuff they have in there. What is that, a table? Good lord you have to be joking me. It's 2021. And these guys are still on their table bs. Well you can miss me with that. I'll be over here in a virtual waiting room, with no tables whatsoever. Just me and my keyboard. And mouse, obviously. And it's sitting on a desk. Which is not a table! I swear!! Get 10% off your first month of BetterHelp, with absolutely no tables, at BetterHelp.com/YKS.

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Episode 229: Genius Olympics Nov 28, 2021

Monday morning! Quite possibly the worst time of the week, many were saying, until the saints and kings of YKS Inc. altered their release schedule to give us all a pep in our step. Thank God for those perfect souls! Today on the show, fate smiles upon us once again as the boys are talking Rob Rigglin', the Mither Beath Borger, and the Great Toast Rant. Plus, we got souls of inanimate objects to look at, new innovations in the butter shape space, and European guys hopping around in their living rooms for whatever reason. It's enough reason to hop in your time machine and listen to this episode over and over again. But you gotta start right now! Or else Mike wins!

For more YKS this hall of daze season, you're gonna want to head on over to YKS Premium. There's so much extras over there you know we had to fix you a plate. Scoot your butt over there for exclusive video, bonus episodes, merch discounts, and more! This past week on YKS Premium, we once again locked horns with our listeners in a new edition of YKS Live! To Tape, our semi-regular call-in show. And this week, the monthly mailbag returns! We do it every month, which is insane. But we love it. And more importantly, we are contractually obligated to perform by §17.1a.98b.311 "The Law Of Comedy".

This episode of YKS is brought to you by Manscaped. Make Santa proud when he's looking at your penis area! Use code YKS20 at checkout for 20% off and free shipping. Now that's what I call a bowlful of jelly!

Also sponsoring this week's show: NordVPN. Sometimes you can make streaming services you live somewhere else, and pay less money to use them! Is that of value to you? Well, it is to me. And that's why I locked up NordVPN for 2 years. I will be reaping these rewards into 2023 and so too should you. Get up to 73% off a 2 year plan plus a bonus gift at NordVPN.com/yks.

Finally, YKS is supported by BetterHelp. It ain't the holiday season without some good old fashioned cognitive behavioral therapy or what have you. Kiss the uncomfortable waiting room goodbye and stay however comfortable you are in your own home, with BetterHelp. Get 10% off your first month at Betterhelp.com/YKS and tell therapy JF and DB sent ya. Well, not like that!

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Episode 228: Crap and Pee Bags Nov 22, 2021

We all crap and pee, sure. But what then? What then, I ask you?!?! Well there's an app for that, and oh yeah, the app is a bag. On today's show, Mike and JF are OFFICIALLY back on their bullshit, unless you don't like that kind of stuff, in which case it could not be any further from the truth. But! What they do have, whether you like it or not, is some ribald humor, informative discussion on various topics, and a friendship that will stand the test of time. Plus the crap and pee bags thing from the title of the episode. Check it out, gang, and if you don't love it, you can always listen to it anyway. Not everything is gonna be your favorite. Time to grow up!

Want more YKS? Wow! Sorry to hear that? May I ask why not? Oh okay, yeah, I understand. Well, with all that being said, and by the way, I could not agree with you more, these guys are real scumbags. But with all that being said, they do offer weekly bonus episodes and more at the YKS Premium Patreon page. Obviously you won't be taking advantage of their awesome annual subscription discount, or seeing any video content or anything like that. But, as crazy as this sounds, thousands of people are enjoying this stuff every month, and it even makes for a great gift this holiday season. Yeah, really demented stuff. Sad, actually. But that's America for you.

Today's episode of YKS is sponsored by BetterHelp. "I get by with a little help from my friends" - Unknown. Well my friends are all podcast guys so I actually just go to therapy instead. And therapy is one thing the folks at BetterHelp have a bunch of. Don't see any? Ask 'em about it, and they can check in the back to see if there's more in stock. Get 10% off your first month at BetterHelp.com/YKS

Also sponsoring today's show: NordVPN. I tell you one way NordVPN has made my life a little better: sports! I'm sick of region-locked teams and blackouts, and NordVPN makes those a thing of the past. Like the dinosaurs! Thanks, NordVPN, for helping me blast some dinos. Unlock the world of entertainment for yourself with 73% off a 2 year deal plus one month for free at NordVPN.com/YKS.

Finally, YKS is also brought to you by TrueBill. With some notable exceptions of course, our big old list of subscriptions can really get wet and wild sometimes. Truebill is all about giving that credit card a rest. Little massage, maybe some hot cocoa...dare I say a bubble bath? That's right folks, Truebill will sort through your subscriptions and help you drop the ones you don't want anymore or never needed in the first place, and they will also put your credit card in the bathtub. Try 'em out today at Truebill.com/YKS and save yourself an amount of money I can barely even quantify! Maybe like $60 or so?

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Episode 227: We're Driving Down The Road Nov 15, 2021

Now how's this for a Monday afternoon treat -- the thing that I should have posted on Monday morning! Oh well, I guess our old friend Garfield really had it right! And that's all I want to say about him for now. On today's show, Mike and JF go wild and crazy on some bad inventions, and oh yeah, there are no holds barred either! Download this "shiznit" right now for our thoughts on an even weirder form of "minting coins", an upgrade to your Tesla experience (that isn't trading it in for a real car), and playing poo poo games with other adults. Pull your pants up, lock your band's 5 trombones in the van, and grab your phone...it's time for YKS!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt. Title for this episode from Poochie D: "Just have it be whatever the fuck Mike says at about 45:47" -- you got it, pooch!

For more YKS, you GOTTA head on over to the YKS Premium Patreon page. What awaits you is pure physical pleasure, and -- oh geez, oh golly, I got my descriptions mixed up. Well basically we have a huge backlog of premium episodes -- movie commentaries, interviews with our friends, games, more Kickstarter stuff, ad-free episodes, a video feed, and more. It's pretty cheap, all things considered, and without you guys we wouldn't make the show anymore. So thanks for listening, and also it says here it'll make you nut off like a fire hose. Oh gosh dernit!

Today's episode of YKS is sponsored by HelloFresh....or "presh" as Mike would say. Get a load of this guy, he's talking like he's got a mouthful of pumpkin! Luckily my several flubs were more easily edited out of this week's ad read. Anyhow, it's the famous season of Autumn and you know what that means...food!(?) If you want to try food out for yourself -- I've heard only good things -- head on over to hellofresh.com/yourkickstartersucks14 and use promo code yourkickstartersucks14 for 14 free meals and 3 free gifts. 17 free things total! That's a lot of things.

This week's show is also brought to you by BetterHelp. "Welp...it's Betterhelp!" Get 10% off your first month of BetterHelp today at BetterHelp.com/YKS

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Episode 226: YKS Saves The Kids Nov 08, 2021

Scam alert! Scam alert! It's time for Mike and JF to don their investigative journalism hats and read the comments on a weird Kickstarter to see if someone else thinks its a scam or not. And maybe it's not, who knows. Not us, that's for sure. On today's episode we fix the entire movie industry, put fireworks likers in their place at long last, and destroy the entire oil industry. Not the really really bad one. Just the kinda bad one. So not really a huge win by us but it's only Monday so give us some time and we will deliver you another big W later in the week. All that, plus a Neighbor Insight, and much much more, only on Your Kickstarter Sucks (name in description for SEO purposes).

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.

For more of this crazy nonsense we call YKS, check out the YKS Premium Patreon page, where 5 extra episodes a month, plus incredible video stylings from Producer Dan await the dedicated listener. Oh yeah and we just casually throw in ad-free eps, merch discounts, Discord access and more like we don't even care about it but we actually do.

Today's episode of YKS is sponsored by BetterHelp. BetterHelp: why get worse help when you could get BetterHelp? That's just what I think and I barely know anything about anything. But I wrote it down on my hand here so I'd remember it when I typed this up. And the handwriting's clear enough so I'm saying it. Sick of the uncomfortable waiting rooms? BetterHelp was, too, that's why they invented staying at your house and getting professional therapy there, instead of in the waiting room. Try it today atBetterhelp.com/YKS for 10% off your first month and safely 6 feet away kiss the uncomfortable waiting room goodbye!

Also sponsoring today's show: Honey! Oh baby I finally got some reinforcements for my battle against the fearsome promo code box at checkout. The battlefield is set (the computer). The weapons have been chosen (uh, maybe this one is the computer). Gird your loins and prepare for war...coupon codes on me!!! Download the free extension today at JoinHoney.com/YKSand start saving buttloads of cash...for the greater good! And use your computer to do it by the way.

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Episode 225: Uncle Jame's Communist Birthday Nov 01, 2021

What if I told you...it was time to write the episode description, but you didn't want to? Would you shrink from the limelight and open another tab on the computer...or would you rise to the challenge, and write the best episode description of all time, a handful of paragraphs enshrined forever in the Episode Description Hall of Fame alongside the one that just says "Buh?" and the one with the copied synopsis from Avatar or whatever it was? Follow me down the rabbit hole and find out what your mind is truly made of...

Today on the show we have a bunch of stupid projects to talk about and I think we do about 5 minutes on "poop worms". Enjoy.

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.

Over on YKS Premium, Miketober continues...just kidding! Fuck that shit! We're sick of it! It's all over! We do have the official Squeeze Louise Halloween Mailbag dropping tomorrow, but after that it's smooth sailing with classic YKS Premium episode concepts such as....Oh Crap We Don't Have An Idea For This One, and Drink A Weird Soda for 25 Minutes. Come check out our new Set It and Forget Option: Set up your subscription and Forget your password: the only way to enjoy YKS!

This week's show is sponsored by HelloFresh! There are so many awesome benefits to HelloFresh it would probably take me about 40 hours in a week to list them all. Here's one: you can finally get your meals organized! And that right there is important as heck. Inside these nice little boxes is everything you need for a quick, easy, and healthful meal...just the good stuff and none of the BS! Check it out today at hellofresh.com/yourkickstartersucks14 and use promo code YourKickstarterSucks14 for 14 free meals and free shipping! Damn!

Also sponsoring today's episode: NordVPN. Hey what'd you get me for Cyber Month? A big honking SUV with a red bow on it in the driveway for some reason? Yuck! I'd rather have NordVPN...the fastest, securest, entertainment-unlockingest VPN this side of the Chattahoochee River....and that side, too! Make up for your whiff of a gift with NordVPN and the promo code YKS...that's gonna get ya 73% off and a free month to boot...yeah, Santa's boot that is! Kick!

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Episode 224: Intellitainment TV Oct 25, 2021

Now Loading...funny ass episode description...10%...20%...25%. ERROR?: Loading not complete? Proceed anyway Y/N? YYYYYYY

Alright folks it's another episode of YKS and if you're anything like me you have to be wondering...what could the next 90 or so minutes of my life be like? Let's scour the old notes here for some hints. Well it looks like we drove Goofy's Truck around for a spell and went to Knight School, then figured out what Linux distro Hunter Biden had on his laptop (think we got it wrong? drop us an email from your custom keyboard!) Plus we got a new type of alcohol that really promises to change the game, another product aiming to put the humble plunger out of a job, and what essentially adds up to a lasagna-covered pipe bomb. ERROR: Memory overload. Forgot what computers say when they're done doing computer stuff. Continue...?

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.

Miketober continues over at YKS Premium and this week we're doing Hellgate (1989) with the one and only Paul F. Tompkins! For perhaps our worst and least-available movie yet, we invited one of the nicest and funniest guys around to come deal with our shit for a while. Hellgate imagines a one horse town, left for dead, first figuratively, then literally, and well a bunch of stuff happens and a lady goes crazy kind of. I'm not actually sure what it is about because it is god awful but we'll all be talking about it together, this Friday, only on the YKS Premium Patreon!

Today's show is sponsored by NordVPN. I am using NodVPN, as I sit here and type out this copy, to unlock the world of entertainment television from the comfort of my home office. Yes, it's true, even an entertainment maven such as myself has something to gain from teaming up with NordVPN, and you can too. Just go to NordVPN.com/YKS for a deal so absurd you'll barely believe it. 73% off and 4 months free. Good lord. Stop reading this and go be entertained!

YKS is also brought to you by BetterHelp. Boy stuff sure is wild sometimes, huh? That's how I feel anyways. Well I'm not a doctor or even that smart of a guy so maybe I shouldn't say that. Stuff sure is, sometimes, huh? Actually I only did like 2 years of philosophy so maybe I shouldn't say that either. Point is, there's people out there who actually can tell you whether stuff is, or is wild, and if you ask me it's nice to talk to 'em. If you want a professional, open-minded, and most of all, CLASSY therapist, head on over toBetterHelp.com/YKS for 10% off your first month. The therapy is still 100% good though so don't worry about that. They're still gonna try.

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Episode 223: But His Emails! Oct 18, 2021

In a world...where a man needed every email he'd ever sent, and his friends thought he was crazy...a hero emerged...and it was the man, from before. The one with the emails...Coming soon to whatever the funniest streaming service to say would be...it's The Email Genius. On today's show, we're talking about why I'm so great, how I'm great, why I'm the best, etc. Plus Mike goes Poop Cop Mode and we listen to some Chap Hop! Oh and the projects are like, a porno guy and a shoe and a towel. Not that great but that's why we did all the other stuff. We knew it sucked! That's why we were funny this time!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.

Miketober continues over at YKS Premium and this week we're doing The Stuff (1985)! A mysterious new treat is sweeping the nation, and its most devoted fans find that they just can't eating it...and they don't want anything else. Who better to discuss the horror of junk food consumption than our friends The Doughboys! That's right, Nick Wiger and Mike Mitchell join us this Friday for The Stuff, only on YKS Premium!

YKS is sponsored by Manscaped. Hate not getting 20% off plus free shipping on your order of men's top grooming essentials? Yeah, we did too. That's why we hacked into the Manscaped Mainframe (Manframe) and deployed our own Manscaped Malicious (Manlicious) code...it was all for you! Mike was the guy doing backflips in the server room, while I sat down the block in a very normal looking work van filled to the brim with computers and wires and stuff. Everything went great (well, Mike broke his neck doing a cartwheel off a networking rack) and now the discount is yours: 20% off and free shipping at Manscaped with the code YKS20! Do it for Mikey!

Also sponsoring this week's episode is HelloFresh. Ding-dong! It's time to get organized! Just to get you started, how about a big box full of classic autumn vegetables, such as...pumpkin, maybe? And crust? Pumpkin and crust...now there's a perfect union! Hell, they've got my vote! Anyway to tell you the truth I didn't get a pumpkin. I got normal stuff like, fish and whatnot, which was also good. But maybe you'll get a pumpkin. At any rate, what I do is basically take the stuff out of the box and cook it. What you do with it after that is up to you but I suggest eating the food. I'll leave the rest to your imagination...Try it for yourself today at HelloFresh.com/YKS14 and you're gonna wanna use that promo code as well, YKS14 for 14 free meals and free shipping! Wow-ee I can't wait to eat my pumpkin!

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Episode 222: Bat in the Cave Oct 11, 2021

e.g., On this award-winning show, we dive deep into the psyches of the world's cereal killers. Does Snap make Crackle Pop? And is Tony really that grrreat after all? All this, and more, from Cereal <--- That's the suggested text for the description box of this episode, so now you can make an informed decision as to whether my descriptions are good or not. I don't have an opinion either way. I'm just sitting here doing my thing. On today's show, we've got not one but TWO top tens for a total of top twenty, a 21 beep salute for our fallen smoke alarms, and also something called Trevr Huntr, I think. Plus, Mike fucks me over on the 6-pack once again. All this, and more, from Cereal. Just kidding.

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.

Want more YKS? Oh golly! We're plum fresh out. NOT. Check out YKS Premium Presents: Miketober, our exclusive monthlong series over at Patreon. This week's episode: our friend Katherine Krueger of Elle and Discourse joins us for Slumber Party Massacre (1982)! Yaaay! I'm doing the Kermit waving his arms around thing!

This week's YKS is sponsored byHoney. Now this here is a little guy that lives in your web browser and wants to save you money. Best of all, he's stupid as hell so he can't send out any of your info to the bad guys. He just plum forgets it! But we still love him. Hell, he saved me some dollars on a hat which I will wear every day. Thanks, Honey. Check him out at JoinHoney.com/YKS!!

Also sponsoring today's show is BetterHelp. Nothing puts a smile on my face like knowing I'll never suffer an uncomfortable waiting room ever again. From now on, I'm sitting at home, where I like being! Get yourself that same feeling of pure bliss, and also some other good stuff for mental health as well, by going to BetterHelp.com/YKS for 10% off your first month of no waiting rooms and professional counseling, from BetterHelp!

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Episode 221: New Crypto Scam Just Dropped Oct 04, 2021

Monday morning...Guess it's time to pour a cup of java, head to "my office" to drop some stink off, and tune in to the best podcast known to man. And after I'm done with whatever that is, I'll be listening to YKS, the show for which these next few paragraphs should serve as the description!

On today's show we're talking about the wild world of wrasslin' (with apologies to all our friends who love it), possibly renaming Green Knight to reflect how nothing happens in it (Stink Night?), and an Mike's intense love affair with the scroll wheel. Plus, we're blowing away the poopoos with compressed air, sleeping at the hospital in a pine box, and narrating a dog jumping on a fence to millions of adoring fans. It's just THAT kinda day on YKS, folks, and if you don't think that's miracle shit, then it's not for you and very little is!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.

Want more YKS? And would rather it be about horror movies than Kickstarters, feature good segments instead of bad ones, and have incredible guests instead of none at all? Kind of makes you think that should be the show all the time, huh? Nope! It's just one month and it's only on YKS Premium Presents: Miketober! This week's episode: Nic Newsham of Gatsby's American Dream joins us for Halloween III: Season of the Witch! No tricks, all treats baby!

This week's episode is brought to you by HelloFresh! Ohhhh Hello Fresh! They're the number one meal delivery service in America for a reason...and the reason, you have to assume, is their excellent working relationship with the Your Kickstarter Sucks podcast. In fact, things have been going SO well between us that they gave us the all clear to hook our listeners up with a deal of dare I say epic proportions? Or portions, perhaps! That's right, heading over to HelloFresh.com/yourkickstartersucks14 and using the promo code yourkickstartersucks14 is gonna get ya 14 free meals plus free shipping. Now That's Fresh!

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Episode 220: Faith Meat Sep 27, 2021

Hey everyone well it's a new episode of YKS! Writing these things is fuckin' torture but we're gonna grit our teeth and get through it, okay? Just a couple more sentences. I already did the other parts and this is the last thing I'm doing before I get some lunch. I left my notes downstairs so I'm going to try to remember what we talked about instead. Ok I think there's a social media website on here for sure. And I remember the kids who were trying to do a guitar solo or something. That was pretty funny. Wow we're almost done. Okay, plus! A very frightening update on the pussy steamer from 2019. And we're done. I hope everyone enjoyed that because it took me down to like 2 hp and I need a bunch of beef jerky now.

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.

Want more YKS? Well, I reckon the place to get it is the YKS Premium Patreon. And now is a great time to jump in, gang, because October is Miketober all month long! Join us and some very special guests as we comb through Mike's catalog of scary movies (and the Wolfman's hair! Yuck!). It's gonna be a real scream! This week on YKS Premium: the one and only Howell Dawdy returns to discuss Berserker (1987)! And coming up right before that, a Squeeze Louise mailbag! Hell of a week to join YKS Premium. Hell of a week.

Today's show is brought to you by...Gumball! Zuhh??? Who sponsors the sponsors? That's right gang, Gumball.FM is a great place to look at, buy, or sell ads, or think about them or whatever you want. I personally like to go on there to see what ads I'm reading this week. But if I were a product or service, I might want to buy an ad...on this podcast even! Check em out over there, and check us out too. And don't forget to enjoy products and/or services, alright?!

Also sponsoring today's show? BetterHelp! Oh, it's BetterHelp! Now here's the place to go for professional, convenient, and affordable counseling. It's basically counseling, except they put their own special twist of being professional, convenient, and affordable on it. Other therapists sitting there going, "D'oh! Why didn't I think of that?!" Well, too late! BetterHelp beat ya to the punch. Try 'em out today at BetterHelp.com/yks and get 10% off your first month.

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Episode 219: The Bread Shelf Sep 20, 2021

Sorry antivaxxers!!! It's time to listen to an episode of YKS: another Wowmazing! show from Dingo Products. On today's show, we're talking about how damn FINE I look in black jeans, plus a bunch of other crap who cares. These jeans, though, wow! They really hug all my curves, and are buttery soft. I've been turning them inside out in the wash so they don't bleed even though honestly that doesn't make much sense to me. They get wet either way, right? If the inside of the clothes don't get wet in the washer, what the hell am I even doing? Makes no sense. But that's what it says on the tag there. Man that's sad about Norm MacDonald, huh? Okay enjoy the show.

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.

Need more YKS so much you can't stand it? The place to go is YKS Premium -- now with video! We have a great slate of episodes planned for Miketober but you might as well get in now as we smash the 2 or 3 remaining brain cells we have together in a vain attempt to come up with some good shit before then. It might work!

This week's YKS is sponsored by Manscaped -- now folks, I've talked a lot of shit in my day but here's the real scoop: Manscaped makes some good ass products! You can catch me with the Lawnmower 4.0, shears (nails, eyebrow, etc), and cologne. And the crop gel is, hand to god, the best shave gel I've ever used. It's sooooooooo slick. Damn! If you want to try any of this stuff for yourself, first of all I don't blame ya one bit. Secondly, it would be a big help to me personally if you'd use the promo code YKS20 at checkout. Oh shit, and it actually helps you out, too? Because you get 20% off and free shipping? Wow. I guess I don't see why you wouldn't do it then! Unless you're a bad person....???

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Episode 218: The Cult of JF Sep 13, 2021

Another YKS? Zuhhh? Why don't these guys just quit while they were ahead! They were doing so great! I really love them but it makes me so mad that they won't stop doing episodes, and defeating my salty ass in the process! <---- Sadly, this is what many of our haters sound like today as we release another episode of our beloved podcast. Unfortunately we just can't help these people, as they're determined to not be happy by listening to our wonderful show! Assuming they can get over themselves, they've got some great stuff to listen to today: we've got the big toilet paper brand run down, Mike's wistful memories of his wooden car, and yes, finally, nice dogs telling jokes! So give us a Howdy Dowdy Doo and Gobbledy Gobbledy Goo, and pop the headphones in. It's another (sorry haters!) YKS!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.

This week's YKS is sponsored by Honey! When it comes to discount codes, I gotta say Honey is the undisputed champ! Whether it's protein bars, new jeans, or fancy trash bags, Honey has probably got a code to save you some of that cold hard cashola. And maybe you buy other stuff, too, I don't know! That's just what I like. Check 'em out for yourself at JoinHoney.com/YKS and tell 'em the Fancy Trash Lad sent ya!

YKS is also brought to you by BetterHelp. Let's get out there and get some help, gang. Confidential, Convenient, Professional, and Affordable: you get 'em all with BetterHelp! No, you don't gotta pinch yourself, they really stuffed all that in there. Hey I need these guys to help me pack my luggage. Probably not going to be going on a trip for a while you know. But you gotta admit it would be pretty cool. Join over 1 million people who love listening to YKS and have taken charge of their mental health (unrelated) by going to BetterHelp.com/YKS. Get 10% off your first month while you're there! By going there!

Want more YKS? Yeah, me too! That's why I subscribed to YKS Premium, the place to be for all the biggest YKS fans to chill, hangout, and listen to YKS! This week on the show, a little birdy told me the charismatic and handsome YKS hosts might be responding to all our suggestions about where they should move and reviewing the best and worst "twin movies" ever put to whatever they record movies on now. Wow! I really want to check that out! I'm just a normal fan. Okay, JF out. I mean, not JF! Oh crap!!!

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Episode 217: American Friend John Hamburger Sep 06, 2021

Hold on to your butt, Mike, cause we're crankin this thing up to 79.8 gigawatts and going back in time! Or forward in time. Whatever the hell that movie is about, I couldn't honestly tell you. On today's YKS, we're imagining a world where all the Proud Boys are safely under the ocean, playing some erotic games, and, oh my god, sharing memes finally. Fuck yes! We can finally share memes! I've had all these memes here just sitting around and I...wow. This is big. Okay, you're gonna wanna tune into this one. For the lols! That's a meme I just shared! Oh god I'm gonna blow!!!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.

This week's episode of YKS is sponsored by Signalwire -- the ONLY place to get easily deployable SDKs and APIs this side of, well, anywhere, I'm pretty sure! Whether you're into video collaboration tools or jam-packed virtual concerts, Signalwire is where it's all happening. Try it today at Signalwire.com/YKS and get $25 of developer credit with the promo code YKS. And jam on, dude!!!

Also sponsoring this week's show: HelloFresh! Now I'll be honest with ya, folks. I consider myself a seafood fan, but I can't recall ever trying the species of catadromous fish that Australis Aquaculture once called the "It" Fish...until HelloFresh stepped in. "Open up!" they said. And open I did. What a meal. What a delight. A whole new fish, in my mouth, and I look cool for being ahead of the curve? Are you kidding me? Where do I sign up? Here, I'll tell ya: HelloFresh.com/yourkickstartersucks14 is the place to go, and yourkickstartersucks14 is the code to use for 14 free meals and free shipping. What will YOU try next? You can't say barramundi, because that's what I said. Get your own thing.

Want more YKS? Well the only place you're gonna get it, unless you kick down my fuckin' door and force me to riff like crazy, which is a CRIME brother, and I've got a bunch of Home Alone traps set up too so don't try it, is to sign up for YKS Premium over on Patreon. We've got a big month coming up, as you may well know, but I'll be damned if we ain't still pumpin' out good shit every week leading up to it anyway. This past week we looked at another half dozen or so projects you can force us to buy, and oh yeah...it's all on video!!! Check it out now and binge every single second of the past 4 years until it's scary movie time and "you know what"...

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Episode 216: Rat Stuck In Airlock Aug 30, 2021

Hey everybody have you seen my balls they're...well, you know the rest! I guess I better stop singing a song and get on with typing out the episode description, huh? This week on YKS we're talkin' all the latest websites that have dropped, remembering the combo TV/VCR, The Crag Cave, and even more sexy ideas. Sorry if you feel cheated, but we're in The Goldilocks Zone (references to this episode)! Read on for more references to the show you're about to listen to, plus general information about us and our creative partners. Won't hurt you none.

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.

YKS is brought to you this week by SignalWire...now this is the place to go, I'm telling you, if you want to build the future of video communication. Because they're already doing it! You're gonna wonder how we ever did virtual live concerts without 'em! Try it right this very second at SignalWire.com with promo code YKS to get $25 in developer credit. And say hello to the future for us!

Also sponsoring the show this week is BetterHelp. Sick of inconvenient, unprofessional, unaffordable counseling? Well, the BetterHelp folks were too. That's why they invented BetterHelp. And that's what kicked off this beautiful relationship we have here. And a lot more beautiful relationships as well I would assume (although it's all confidential so I have no idea). Get 10% off your first month at BetterHelp with promo code YKS and start having some good relationships or whatever!

Hey gang, if you need more YKS in your life, I'm the last guy on Earth who's gonna blame ya for that. This week on YKS Premium...not sure yet, but we got the Squeeze Louise mailbag coming out tomorrow! Check it out!

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Episode 215: The Rappin' Monsters Aug 23, 2021

Alright you all, listen up. And I really mean listen! Because I reckon that's what the show is all about. Today we're doing 6 Kickstarters...sike! Who cares! On this week's episode we're figuring out The Perfect Age, revisiting (apparently) some Tweets from Tattooine, and talking about all the things I personally haven't done. That takes up most of the show, of course, but we do have time to touch on what makes a shelf a shelf, ruining the value of our precious Pokemon cards, and helping grampy choke down his one medicine every day. Sounds like a real snooze but I promise it's fine. Seriously!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.

Want more YKS? Well then dadgummit you're gonna want to head over to YKS Premium, the place we post more of the shows! This week we've got a VERY special episode...but you're just gonna have to listen to it to find out what it is! New shit every Friday, with video to boot. What more could you want? And be realistic. I mean come on. You know what we're capable of.

This week's show is sponsored by Signalwire. People come up to us all the time, strong people, with tears in their eyes, and they're saying "Thank you. Thank you for telling us about Signalwire. We love it so much." And folks, that's why we do what we do. And Signalwire does what they do because they love helping YOU build the future of video communication. Check em out today and get $25 in dev credit by heading over to Signalwire.com and using the promo code YKS.

This week's show is also brought to you by NordVPN. Now these guys know what VPNs are all about. And I do too, and I even knew it beforehand. They didn't tell me anything! I knew it all on my own. Don't believe me? Well the truth is there for you at NordVPN.com/yks. Use promo code YKS if you REALLY want to figure out what I know about VPNs, which is everything. Plus you'll get a screamin' wheel of a deal...on knowledge! And VPN service also.

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Episode 214: Shrimp Shirt Aug 16, 2021

Webster's Dictionary defines "riffing" as a verb which means "to discharge (a person) from military or civil service, especially as part of an economy program." And that seems wrong but I don't see a phone number on the website so I don't know what to do about it. This week on YKS we get an update on our old friend the Shrimp Diva, a grift for Tesla Turds that somehow seems to not be working, and we discover a gold mine in bad celebrity impersonations. Plus, a special visit from Millennial Bane. No whammies on this episode gang so get your clicks in while they're hot! What the fuck...no idea.

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.

For more YKS, check out the YKS Premium Patreon page. This week on the show, we got a Double Guest Situation as our two music geekiest friends, Every Time I Die frontman Keith Buckley and former Boston Phoenix music critic David Thorpe join us to discuss, what else but Gordon Ramsey! I don't think they knew each other before this, which makes you wonder why we did it! Well, go listen and find out. On Friday, I mean. At the Patreon page. Okay.

This week's show is sponsored by SignalWire. You think you got the lowest latency, highest quality video broadcasting platform? Bzzt. Wrongo! Cause that's our friends over at SignalWire. You in charge of organizing virtual concerts, collabs, and huge events? Well, what are you waiting for! Try it out today at SignalWire.com with the promo code YKS and nab yourself $25 in free developer credit to develop to your little heart's content.

We're also brought to you this week by BetterHelp. Did ya hear the news? Waiting rooms are a thing of the past! Now "Waiting..." is just the name of a movie we remember as being pretty funny at the time but which in retrospect probably has not aged that well, so we won't be revisiting it. Although Ryan Reynolds seems to be doing ok, so who knows. There's too much good movies and TV now for me to really go back and watch that one again. If I didn't get to it this year, it probably ain't happening. This guy knows what I'm talking about. Anyway, the important thing is this: Get 10% off your first month of convenient, professional counseling by going to BetterHelp.com/YKS and using that code YKS. The goat!

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Episode 213: Oh Hogan! Aug 09, 2021

Another YKS! My god how do they do it! Well it's actually quite simple. First, we come up with a genius idea....oh gosh you probably don't want to hear all that. Let me just tell you what's in the show this week. How about a visit from the mobile vet, Mike driving a Lambo, and a freakin' Hamster's nutsack!? Does that sound good enough for ya? For the free episode we came up with out of the goodness of our hearts? I mean, we put everything we got into this fuckin thing...listening to it is the least you could do. Why do you hate us so much? You want us dead!! Ahhhhh!!!!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, Mr. Baloney, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.

For more YKS, check out the YKS Premium Patreon page. This week on YKS Premium: An anti-globalist album review and the debut of Redbox Rants!

Today's show is sponsored by Honey. Now these guys are serious about having a little thing that pops up and puts in a coupon code. And hell, so am I! If you're like me you want to save something like $3-4 on a phone case cause the dadgum thing keeps flying out of your hands. And what you don't want to do is search all over hither and yon for a code that actually works. We're busy! We got phones to pick up off the dadgum ground! So let Honey do the work for ya. Go to JoinHoney.com/yks and let our little coupon friends know Mike and JF sent ya.

We're also brought to you by the folks at Manscaped. Folks, this ain't ya daddy's pube trimmer! And if it is, he's lookin' smooth as hell! Damn! Now if for some wild reason you don't wanna get shorn with the best of 'em by using the Lawn Mower 4.0, you could still set yourself up pretty good with the cologne, nail trimmers, and lotions these guys got over there. You oughta see my bathroom drawer. It looks like the damn Manscaped warehouse in there. Give 'em a whirl today by going to Manscaped.com/YKS and using that classic promo code YKS for 20% off plus free shipping. Now that right there is gonna help the show and your pubic area...a match made in heaven!

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Episode 212: Dan's Growhouse Aug 02, 2021

Spider-man, spider-man. Showers however a spider-man does. That's the 212th episode description gang, and I'm not sure it gets any better than that. On today's episode of YKS: The Show, we're revisiting the dying embers of the H*tler meme community, ripping off a rip off of a shitty card game, and blowing up our garages with experimental Musktech. Plus, we're MAKING PEOPLE SICK! with an investigative report from the frontlines of the Franchise Wars. All that and basically nothing else, on an all-new episode of the only podcast on iTunes with a 1-star review that says "not about Kickstarter". Let's go!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.

Need more YKS? Oh, god! Well, you'd better check out YKS Premium on Patreon for bonus episodes, ad-free main episodes, and more! This Friday, Mike and JF are going back to school to test their knowledge against your average British Grade 5er in a very special edition of Rubbish Lads. Plus, just yesterday, July's monthly video mailbag hit the Squeeze Louise tier -- we've got all kinda snacks and letters and messages from -- who else, "da fans". Check it out.

This week's show is sponsored by HelloFresh. Now you wanna talk about getting a box of food delivered, you wanna talk about HelloFresh. Head on over and use the promo code YourKickstarterSucks14 for 14 free meals plus free shipping. That's probably a week's worth of eatin'. Not bad!

We're also brought to you by NordVPN. I could sit here and tell you all day about how NordVPN works -- the ins and outs of the tech, not to mention the storied history behind the company and brand. But at the end of the day, all we want is a speedy, anonymous connection, don't we folks? And it's not too much to ask. So I'll say this: try out NordVPN for yourself and use promo code YKS for a deal so good it'll make ya barf.

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Episode 211: Mr. Perfection Jul 26, 2021

It's an all-new YKS! Oh my god! On today's show, which works 60% of the time every time, we're talking about comics with a big goofy dog, the invention that will finally save the boring, dying sport of tennis, and a new frontier in nutrient management. Oh, I'm in a glass case of emotion! Come on in and listen to the show gang, everything's cool. We got the blood lady in here, we got gendercoins, the whole thing. Actually now that I'm writing it out there is a lot of stupid shit in here. Wow. Every week, huh? Okay! That's fine! I'm not even mad you ate the whole wheel of cheese. Anchormen.

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.

Ohhh I need more YKS! Somebody help me! Ok smart guy, check out the YKS Premium Patreon page. It's almost the end of the month, so get in there now and snag a Squeeze Louise membership for access to the exclusive 5th bonus episode! It's basically me and Mike opening boxes and talking, but people go crazy over it. Plus, the normal bonus ep on Friday! Hoo boy we still gotta record that one. Gonna be a squeaker.

This week's episode is sponsored by BetterHelp. You talk about a damn website where you can get professional, affordable counseling! For my money, it's gotta be BetterHelp. Use promo code YKS for 10% off your first month at BetterHelp. With a side of crab salad, oh mama!

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Episode 210: May The Clean House Be With You Jul 19, 2021

Okay gang I'm gonna level with ya. I'm about to walk out of the door and I'm gonna rush through this episode description so I can leave. I have a bunch of errands to run. Not really fun stuff either but just the kinda thing you gotta do. Let's get it over with! On today's show we have an Apology of the Week AND a Real or Fake...you don't see that too often anymore. Hell, maybe ever. That's right, this is a YKS First: Two Segments! I've heard of a two drink minimum but this is ridiculous. Ok doesn't really make sense but like I said time is of the essence. Some of the Kickstarters we talk about today: a vacuum that looks like a lightsaber, a bar that doesn't serve any alcohol, and a new supplement for dogs who don't like the taste of normal water. Plus, we have a campaign that we actually kinda like. Alright that looks like about the normal length of one of these so I'm gonna take off. You guys enjoy the episode and, as always, if there's some horrible mistake with the publication or content, please don't hesitate to reach out and ruin my day. See ya next week...I'm goin to the store!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.

Want more YKS? Check out the YKS Premium Patreon page for weekly bonus episodes, monthly mailbags, video eps, and more. This week we've got a very special guest who somehow hacked our studio line to discuss a very promising new phone product. Who could it be! Only one way to find out...Ok fine I'll tell you. It's our friend Dan O'Sullivan pretending to be the FreedomPhone guy. Alright, I told you. Now go sign up to hear it on Friday! Keep your end of the bargain...

Today's episode is sponsored by Manscaped. I wouldn't trust anyone else near my junk...not Freddy, not Jason, not none of those ghoulies with the big sharp sticks, no sir! Just Manscaped. They got this new Perfect Package 4.0 out now and if that don't have ya ready to head out to the beach with a mysterious secret, well, nothin' will. Try em out today at Manscaped.com and use the promo code YKS for 20% off and Free Shipping. And don't go to sleep!

This week's show is also brought to you by NordVPN. I just now realized I capitalized the phrase "free shipping" up there and it looks really weird. Sorry about that. Perhaps I will hide my shame and virtual identity by using a virtual private network service. If only there were one I could trust, with over 5000 servers all over the world, and no data logging. Oh god! Well anyway, check out NordVPN with the promo code YKS for 73% off a 2 year plan and 4 months free. Yowza!

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Episode 209: Saturday the 14th Jul 12, 2021

It's Monday, and you know what that means: we all cross our fingers and hope Apple Podcasts pulls its head out of its ass and delivers this week's episode to thousands of our adoring fans. Assuming it works as intended, this week you're gonna get a great show. Mike and JF are talking Kitchen Time, having a Footnotes Fight, and going Neil DeGrasse Tyson style on the goofs and screw-ups of classic slasher Friday the 13th. Plus, we thank America for all its opportunities, get paid to let a social media company spy on us, and finally talk (at great length, and with impressive detail) about AnimeTube, the Kickstarter that's pissing everyone off this week. This ep is so great that absolutely nothing could derail it, save for a malfunctioning RSS backend in the most popular podcasting app, which has no contact form or accountability whatsoever. Anyway, enjoy!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.

Coming up on this Friday's YKS Premium: Howell Dawdy! Our friend and resident thememaster returns to bullshit around, discuss his greatest podcasting triumph (me), and Name That Toon.

This week's show is sponsored by Honey. It's free and saves you money. Ergo, if you don't use it, you are wasting money. That kind of makes a lot of sense. I'm glad I came up with it. If you'd like to be like ol' JF (or, uh, your personal hero, whoever that is...seems like it should be JF) and save on protein bars for your body or books for your brain, go to JoinHoney.com/yks and download the thing.

YKS is also brought to you by BetterHelp. You know the score with these guys, and it's practically 100-0! They are really running it up. Probably because they're a convenient, affordable, and professional counseling service that's already helping millions of people. But go off I guess. For 10% off your first month, head on over to the website and sign up with our special link. Helps us, helps you. It just makes sense!

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Episode 208: Quit Grabbin Yourself Jul 05, 2021

Hey everybody! I'm writing another episode description today. What are you doing? Send us an email and let us know. On this week's show, we're remembering (vaguely) what happened in baseball a long time ago, exploring the world of Toupo & Dookie, and finding out whose balls these are. What to heck...I thought these were my balls! Oh crud. Plus we're trying out our Australian accents and hoping no one gets mad at that. Or at least at me. I tried my best!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.

YKS is sponsored by HelloFresh. KISS: Keep It Simple Stupid! We need to update this one for modern times. Keep I'm Salad Spinning. If you want to try HelloFresh, America's #1 Meal Kit, I recommend going to HelloFresh.com/yourkickstartersucks14 and using that code yourkickstartersucks14. That's gonna get ya 14 free meals plus free shipping. Not a bad deal all things considered. Plus the food's good.

Coming up on YKS Premium: A brand new edition of What The Fund! What will we be forced to buy next!?

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Episode 207: MudDump1! Jun 28, 2021

Another day, another dollar. That's our hardhat, lunchpail approach to creating content, and it most certainly shines through in this episode, yet another instant classic. The 207th in a row. What we've got for you today, gang, is an update on Mike's tooth. And if for some insane reason you need more of a reason to listen than that, well, we also have about 6 Kickstarter projects that we make fun of, and they range from the silly (hand dryer for home use) to the quite frankly absurd (bone conducting mp3 sunglasses). But again, the main thing to remember about this episode is that we are talking about Mike's Tooth. To the extent, quite possibly, that I should have named the episode 207: Mike's Tooth. Too late for me now, though. Not for you! Enjoy the show!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.

YKS Premium is the place to be for more Mike and JF tooth content, folks, and if you haven't heard the most recent episode with the greats Tom and Demi, well, you are in for a treat. And the treats keep coming, so open up your treathole! This Friday our friends also the greats Derek and Dril join us to do whatever their crazy brains can come up with. And you are gonna want to check that out. Plus: no ads, videos of the episodes, and much much more. ONLY at the YKS Premium Patreon. And if you find it anywhere else, it's fake!

This week's YKS is sponsored by BetterHelp. Could ya use some help? Hell, who couldn't? And you might as well get it from the comfort of your own gamer chair in a fart-filled office. Try BetterHelp today and get 10% off your first month by going to BetterHelp.com/yks and using that damn code, YKS!

Yes it's true, we're also sponsored by NordVPN. Wanna be a Limousine-drivin', Netflix-unlockin', no data-retainin' son of a gun? Well NordVPN is a good place to get 'er done. Maybe it's not a place. It's more like an idea. An idea...about saving our listeners money on the top VPN service money can buy. And here's how they do it: by going toNordVPN.com/yks, which makes sense, and using promo code YKS, which makes even more sense, to get 73% off plus 4 free months, which makes the most sense of all.

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Episode 206: Delivery Reimagined Jun 21, 2021

You already know what time it is! On today's programme, the two perfect friends Mike and JF are plumbing the depths of the data cube, exploiting the byzantine and outdated US tax code, and pivoting last minute to a LIVE Kickstarter selection. Oh yeah, and you could say maybe we're reimagining delivery as well. All that and a brand new segment that Mike really hates, on this episode of YKS! Wow what the fuck!

Oh yeah, and for more YKS, how could I damn forget, check out the YKS Premium Patreon. Over there is where we post the absolute USDA Prime Cuts of YKS: Unfiltered, Unafraid, and Ungiving a fuck! On this week's show, from the hilarious podcast BigSoftTitty.png, our friends Tom Walker and Demi Lardner. Tom and Demi join us to do what they do best: go psycho and make us laugh. Come laugh with us, won't you, this Friday on YKS Premium?

This week's episode of YKS is sponsored by Honey. Imagine if you could have a little friend that lives in your computer, who always knows the best discount codes for your products? And best of all, the friend doesn't tell anyone else what products you buy? You save money AND nobody has to know! Wouldn't that be "sweet"? This started out as an insipid metaphor but actually worked out pretty well. There's a good reason I do this for a living. Anyway, it's real, and it's fabulous, and it's called Honey. Check it out today at JoinHoney.com/YKS and help everyone in the world!

Today's YKS is also brought to you by BetterHelp. You know what these guys are all about: helping you, but even better. Isn't that "sweet"? Get 10% of your first month of professional, affordable, convenient counseling at Betterhelp.com/yks. Sweet!

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Episode 205: Mindscape Origins Jun 14, 2021

Now just what in the hell was Christopher Nolan smoking when he came up with this one! I don't know, but keep it the hell away from me! On today's show we've got the gene-altering project destined to keep humanity around for centuries to come (cool!), a beer-drinking gag gift sent forward into the future by about 40 years (wow!), and a movie dedicated to rehabilitating the public image of cops (finally!). Plus whatever else we talked about to take up the other 90 minutes of the show. I assume it's pretty good.

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer lola butt.

For more YKS, check out the Patreon! Now with video! On this week's YKS Premium, we've got our friends from Globe Hell Warning, Josiah and Drew! Their show may be all about how to save the world, but when it comes to YKS it seems like all they want is chaos. Check em out at http://patreon.com/globehell and wherever you get podcasts.

This week's show is brought to you by Manscaped. Oh mama, that's one clean bush! Hopefully that's what you'll be hearing sometime soon. And Manscaped want's to help ya out. I tell you what I really like from these folks is the cologne. Smells good, and it comes in a cube. What else do you want? A clean bush, I guess, like I said before. Well for 20% off and free shipping on whatever you want over there, use promo code YKS. Come on! Please?!

We're also sponsored by NordVPN. You wanna talk about zoomies, just try going on NordVPN's servers! They'll make your dog look like a slow piece of crap. You wanna unlock Netflix? You wanna, freakin, look like you're browsing around from Colorado? Try NordVPN. For one badass deal, go to nordvpn.com/yks and use code YKS. This is mandatory to do!

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Episode 204: Better With Bacon Jun 07, 2021

It's another YKS and my heart is full of Thanksgiving! On today's show we're talking about the REAL message of Seinfeld, whether the murder hornets are the last thing we need/were on our bingo card, and if we all had the same fun little magic kits when we were kids (sounds like we didn't!) Plus, shitting into a graboid's mouth, a stupid Reddit scam that actually won't work somehow, and the future of Rock 'n' Roll. If that ain't enough for ya then maybe the rest of the show parts I didn't mention will be. There's a lot in there!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

For more YKS, check out the Patreon! Now with video! This week on YKS Premium...well, I'm just gonna tell ya up front. It's a nasty one. We recorded a commentary track for IndieGoGo independent film darling, The Dip Run. It's a heartwarming tale about a bunch of disgusting Proud Boys who drive cross country in an RV to pick up a load of dip. We probably bit off more than we could "chew" on this one, to be honest. These guys are dicks. But their movie sucks, too, so check that out on Friday.

This week's show is sponsored by BetterHelp. For 10% off your first month, go to Betterhelp.com/YKS. A million people are already doing it. Might as well be 1,000,001.

We're also brought to you by HelloFresh. Now I know what you're thinking -- "Wow, that sounds really quick, fun, and healthy!" Yep. You got it dude. Maybe you should do the ads. Anyway go to HelloFresh.com/yourkickstartersucks12 and use code yourkickstartersucks12 if you wanna get 12 free meals and free shipping.

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Episode 203: Where My Damn Kids At? May 31, 2021

We get into Darth Maul's big red "thing", our crazy college drinking days, and the sad demise of the Slim Jim social media pages. Plus we've got a movie about some corncob who met Donald Trump, another Bitcoin scam, and the last couple of synapses firing off in an IT guy's brain. No, I'm not talking about Mike! Come on!

Hey, want more YKS? Well cowpoke, mosey on over to the YKS Premium Patreon and have yourself a lookie loo. First of all, it's where you'll find exclusive VIDEO of today's action-packed episode. Of course, there's also ad-free episodes, bonuses on top of bonuses, and much more. But who gives a flip? We're talkin' 24 frames, and they're happening every second. So check that shit out!

This week's episode is brought to you by BetterHelp. Check these guys out, I'm serious! For professional, affordable, convenient counseling, I doubt you could do any better. I would help you but I'm busy. Why not try BetterHelp? For 10% off your first month, go to BetterHelp.com/yks and use that promo code YKS.

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

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Episode 202: Got Mail? May 24, 2021

Episode 202! They said it couldn't be done. On this week's show we're talking about eating freakin BUGS, why you don't see ol' Bigfoot around anymore, the unpredictable demise of Crackle, and so much more there's no way I could fit it into this description. I also do an approximately 5 minute monologue about exercise during which you may be able to hear Mike walking out of his office and down the street. This is one of those episodes that you just straight up listen to and enjoy yourself in the moment, ok? It ain't goin in the museum. No shame in that! It's normal to do this!

For more YKS, check out the YKS Premium Patreon. This month, we're debuting YKS-Vision(TM), the name for our video podcasts I didn't clear with Mike in advance of writing this blurb. For $8/month, our Squeeze Louise patrons are getting extra bonus episodes every month AND accompanying video put together by visionary director Producer Dan. This week we welcome back "King of the Scams" Chris James to talk about all of this crap you see around nowadays, his latest victories in the ongoing Prank Wars, and his show's debut on Means (Mean?) TV, all in glorious 24 frames per second.

Today's YKS is sponsored by BetterHelp. If I were in charge of BetterHelp, my idea for a slogan would be "BetterHelp: What's your problem?" Needless to say, I'm not in charge of BetterHelp or anything else really, and their slogan is something else. They probably don't have one. But if you'd like to try their professional, confidential counseling service, check it out at BetterHelp.com/yks and use code YKS for 10% off your first month. And maybe if there's a slogan submission box, try the thing I said.

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Episode 201: Mike vs. The Mole People May 17, 2021

I need an always-on camera in my shower....right now! And I need it to be called something really stupid, like The Cherdle! On today's YKS, we're finding out if nanotechnology is real, dealing with being notorious overachievers, the best ways to kill a horse, and, of course, the untimely demise of The Ron Burgundy Show. Mike set me up with some bad ones on this ep, gang, so sorry for that in advance. Hey remember HARAMBE???

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Exec Producer PBostrom.

YKS Premium is still, despite our many haters and enemies, going strong. My advice to you, if you enjoy the program, but care only a small amount about the Kickstarter aspect, and wish you could hear more from Mike and myself about movies, and whackin' off, and eatin' snacks, occasionally with guests, would be to check us out on Patreon. That's where we "hang out" and "chill", and it's really goin' off! This week we've got the first ever JokeBlogger Top 10 x Real or Fake crossover showdown. What the hell could that be? Only one way to find out (with several options/ways to choose...)

Today's episode of the show is sponsored by NordVPN. Unlock your damn streaming sites with NordVPN. They're too locked up and it's time to knock some sense into 'em. Me personally I like to use NordVPN to test whether my Plex server is working outside of my home network, which it often isn't! Nobody makes it easier than NordVPN to see if someone in India can see my open ports. Check em out for yourself at https://nordvpn.com/yks and use promo code YKS for a wheel of a deal.

This week's show is also sponsored by Manscaped. These guys are shaving pubes in 3021, gang. The new LawnMower 4.0 has so much tech on it I think it was probably made by a legally distinct analog of Tony Stark. Also by the way, you heard about it here first on YKS News: We Report, You Enjoy. Check out the new (possibly granted by aliens?) tech on the LawnMower 4.0 at Manscaped.com/yks and use promo code YKS. This will help us, and your balls, and your wallet, with 20% off and free shipping.

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Episode 200: The 100th Episode May 10, 2021

You may remember that we never got around to releasing our big 100th episode. Well, this is why.

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Exec Producer PBostrom.

Check out our friend Dan O'Sullivan's newsletter at Sullyville.io. He sounds really stupid on this episode but he's a great writer.

For bonus episodes of YKS and ad-free regular editions, head over to YKS Premium on Patreon. This week, we bring back fan favorite segment Rubbish Lads, where we watch the worst TV that the UK has to offer. And this one features a classic freak you won't want to miss. Cool, they got em over there too.

This episode of YKS is sponsored by Honey. It's basically this cool little thing that sits in your browser and finds coupon codes for ya. Plus, they don't sell your data, which is nice. I use it and you know how much I like deals (a lot, almost TOO much...I'm putting these places out of business!) Check em out at JoinHoney.com/yks. It's free so who cares!

Today's show is also sponsored by BetterHelp. You know all about these guys...they invented the most comfortable waiting room ever -- your own home! I want you to get a lot of mental health today, so get 10% off your first month at BetterHelp.com/yks

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Episode 199: Birds in the House May 03, 2021

Gather round folks, it's time to hear The Amazing JF read from a list of common household groceries. Please have your pen and paper ready for this one! On today's show we find out whether or not DB's got bars, and also I have some notes referring to the following: "what's going on", "weird thing, 2 minutes", and "ether stank". I need to start taking better notes during the show so I remember what to write about in here. Hopefully some of that makes sense or seems interesting, because I'm not sure the 3-D tattooing preview application or the suppressing student loan utilization projects are download-juicers. So strap on a Bottcoola, cause this might be a slog.

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Exec Producer PBostrom.

For more YKS, check out YKS Premium on Patreon. If you love this, you're gonna like that a little bit probably.

This week, we're sponsored by Hello Fresh. Now that's one hell of a way to get meals delivered to your door. I've been sitting around waiting on my neighbors to do it for me! I'm starvin, Scoob! Just joking I don't talk to my neighbors. Try Hello Fresh today at hellofresh.com/yourkickstartersucks12, and use code yourkickstartersucks12 for 12 free meals, including free shipping!

Today's episode of YKS is also brought to you by BetterHelp. Sick of uncomfortable waiting rooms? The folks are BetterHelp were. That's why they developed the most comfortable waiting room of all time. Unfortunately that company was a massive failure and they switched to doing online therapy instead. If you'd like to try this private, affordable, compassionate service out, go to BetterHelp.com/yks and get 10% off your first month. If you want to try out the most comfortable waiting room of all time, you'll have to try the bottom of the ocean. That's where they buried it!

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Episode 198: My Crazy Hat Apr 26, 2021

We've all heard of eggs. Hell, I had two of em this mornin. But I just kept thinkin...what if there was a metal kind that I couldn't eat??? And it was very expensive as well? Blammo! Kickstarter has something to say about that, my friends, and it's "buy this weird product"! Plus we got some great tunes from Mr Baloney, some help rehabbing those nutty Republicans, and a bunch of other stuff I forgot to write down as well. I think the episode was pretty long, and, well, I think that's just great!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Exec Producer PBostrom.

This week's show is sponsored by BetterHelp. You want private, professional, effective counseling from the comfort of your own home? Well I don't know what to tell ya. Oh wait, yes I do. Check out BetterHelp. Duh! Get 10% off your first month over there by using promo code YKS.

And for more YKS? Uh yeah, you're gonna wanna check out YKS Premium on Patreon. Last week we spoke to the Princes of Podcasting, Hayes and Sean from Hollywood Handbook. This week we get the jester of video game streamers, Tom from ChapoFYM. And later this week, the YKS monthly mailbag drops exclusively on the Squeeze Louise tier -- this time with video! Ya can't miss it gang.

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Episode 197: Hellshrimpers TV Apr 19, 2021

Hey man, make like Justin Bieber and play the hits! On today's show we're joined by a very special guest: Mecha Don Cheadle. MDC tells us all about stomping around Neo-Nashville, battling his fiercest enemies from Planet Munch, and what a crazy year we've all had. Oh oh oh oh oh I've got the moves like Jim Carrey! Start the damn episode! None of that shit I said was real!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Exec Producer PBostrom.

For more YKS, check out YKS Premium on Patreon. We got some great shit coming up this month: Sean and Hayes from Hollywood Handbook, our friend Tom from ChapoFYM, and I bet we will even have a third idea at some point. No ads, discounted merch and more, all over there at the thing I said before.

This episode of YKS is brought to you by Manscaped. Got Bush? Talking about pubes here, gang. Take that mons pubis behind the woodshed and go wild on it with the Lawnmower 3.0. You could pay 20% more and cover your own shipping if you want, but I wouldn't recommend it. Probably would make more sense to use promo code YKS at Manscaped.com, and keep that 20% + shipping money in the ol' back pocket there.

Also sponsoring today's show: NordVPN. Quite simply, you ain't gonna find a better Virtual Private Network anywhere on God's green earth. Go to Mars if you want, but don't come crying to me and NordVPN when it ain't any better up there neither. Meantime, use promo code YKS at https://nordvpn.com/yks for a mega discount on a 2 year deal.

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Episode 196: Breaking News Apr 12, 2021

Well, well, well, it looks like the great site of Kickstarter and its many fine detractors have finally gotten their day in the sun. And oh how sweet it is, folks. Tell me how my ass tastes, other shows and websites! On today's show, Mike and JF discuss the importance of flared bases, having pride in your country, and reading the notes on the episode you already did last week. Plus, our timely thoughts on The Snyder Cut and an email that promises to change the way we do the show forever.

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Exec Producer PBostrom.

Today's show is brought to you by Oxygen. You talk about no fee banking, you talk about big time cash back rewards on some of the categories of commerce we all love so much, you talk about getting a $25 bonus on a $200 deposit...that's Oxygen banking for ya, gang. Check it out on the app store (home of the fabulous app!)

YKS is also sponsored by BetterHelp. Hate waiting rooms? Me too. They make me sick to my stomach. Plus I need therapy. Oh, maybe I could check out BetterHelp?? Uhhh yeah, now you're getting it! Get 10% off your first month of professional, convenient, no-waiting-room therapy at BetterHelp.com/yks. Now that's what's nice.

And for more YKS, hop on over to the YKS Premium Patreon. This week on the show, from You Are Worthy with Lil Mookie B, we're talking to actor and comedian Mookie Blaiklock!

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Episode 195: Harold and Kumar Get the Vaccine Apr 05, 2021

Now this is the episode that makes you say "Well it's Episode 195 of the podcast." That's right gang, it really is. On today's YKS we're taking a deep dive on Da Vinky's Pencil, the bourgeois way we treat scraps of bar soap, and the pitfalls of trying to make a Quentin Tarantino movie when you're even dumber than he is. Plus: what are the most played items on JF and DB's Plex servers? This is content that, for some reason, you won't want to miss. Oh and by the way...Happy FREAKIN Easter!!! If we're even allowed to say that anymore!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Exec Producer PBostrom.

Check out Howell's new show, Fast Track, where he and a guest write a song from scratch in just 30 minutes. You can hear Mike on the first episode and maybe even JF sometime soon.

This week, YKS is sponsored by HelloFresh. I actually just had some HelloFresh for dinner today and I've got but one complaint: it was TOO tasty and convenient. Alright, so two complaints! Well anyway, check em out yourself at HelloFresh.com/yourkickstartersucks12 and use that promo code yourkickstartersucks12 for 12 free meals, including free shipping! Now that's nice.

For more YKS, support us on Patreon. Your YKS Premium subscription entitles your fancy ass to up to 5 bonus episodes a month (or 6 if the calendar gets all fucked up), plus ad-free regular eps, newsletters, and more. This week, Mike and JF are reviewing Godzilla Vs. Kong, checking out some Kickstarters that didn't make it to the big show on In The Cut, and reading more of that weird Tarantino fan's bizarre and disgusting tribute script. And next week we got a great guest: Lil Mookie B!

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Episode 194: Ring Ring...It's Funny! Mar 29, 2021

How do I display my collectibles??? Oh God! Help me! Don't I deserve help? That's what we're talking about this week, folks: who deserves help and who doesn't. So far we've got Funky Pop Guys and that's pretty much it. We're also introducing each other to the Svanki, inventing ethical consumption under capitalism with one weird trick, and helping out the poor folks who love pretending they're that really bad guy from a long time ago. You know who I'm talking about. Not good.

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Exec Producer PBostrom.

YKS is sponsored by Oxygen. Oh yeah, maybe you've HEARD of it? Well the famous gas we love to breathe is back and better than ever before, this time in the form of a banking app for your telephone. Download Oxygen today, and put in $200 to get a $25 bonus. Then let it sit there or spend it, or do whatever you want! That's money for ya, folks.

Today's show is also brought to you by BetterHelp. Now this is a good website to check out if you like fast, affordable, and 24/7 counseling in a wide range of specialties! If they had asked me, I would have said "Aren't you worried about someone inventing BestHelp?" But I was too busy doing something else at the time. Probably at the store. Anyway, they went with BetterHelp and it seems to be working out pretty good. Try it out yourself and get 10% off your first month at Betterhelp.com/YKS.

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Episode 193: You Go Poly Mar 22, 2021

Looks like somebody's got a case of the Mondays! Hey lemme get one haha. On today's show of Your Kickstarter Sucks (The Official Your Kickstarter Sucks Podcast), it's time to have some scary dreams about protecting our friends from inappropriate and unsupervised power tool usage, figure out what to do if your yoda gets a little too hairy, and experience the visceral pain of playing board games with your kids. Plus, we've got a visit from our old friend Eric Cartman, and his big butt and the butt stinks. Hey, get back here with my Jesterpus!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Exec Producer PBostrom.

YKS is sponsored by the fine folks at Oxygen. You've heard of banks, right? Well it's like that, but with an app that works good. Open an account today, just put in $200 and Oxygen will give you a $25 bonus.

Plus, we got our friends at NordVPN. These guys really cracked the code on doing VPNs, I can tell you that much. Go to NordVPN.com/YKS and use code YKS to get a 2-year plan plus one additional month with a huge discount. Cool

And folks we hit for the cycle this week, because this episode is also sponsored by Honey. The cool thing about Honey is they get ya discount codes and you don't have to do an incognito mode search to find them. Also they don't want your data, they just get a cut from the store. Keep your stupid data and save some money on protein bars. That's what I did anyway. Check it out at JoinHoney.com/YKS

This week on YKS Premium: More ads! just kidding. we haven't recorded it yet but it'll be good

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Episode 192: The Ghost of Spencer Gifts Mar 15, 2021

OooooOOOOOoooooOOO! I'm the Ghost of Spencer Gifts! I'm rattling some glow in the dark plastic chains, and rubbing a hard plastic "personal back massager" very inexpertly onto the attic floor! I've been cursed to walk this low traffic corner of the local mall for 100 years as punishment for stealing a KoRn poster in 1998! I died when I swallowed some of the goop inside the display-only lava lamps. Alright that was fun. On today's show we've got the best food bowl for your Pampered Pet, a game for people who can laugh at plumber's butt cracks (everyone???), and a coat to protect us from negative energies. Finally! Now if you will excuse me, I have a plastic cup with a pot leaf and the phrase "Dealer's Choice" on it to knock off the top shelf.

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Exec Producer PBostrom.

Today's show is sponsored by Oxygen. Sick of all the fees and crapola you get from the classic big banks? I actually really am. One of them I'm using has a super messed up app. I had to use the iPad version and zoom in on the text box while pressing one key at a time to sign in. Very annoying! And I didn't get any rewards for doing it! Well Oxygen is different. You get the good app, you get the rewards at the store, the gas station, and food delivery, and you get virtual debit cards as well. Now that's nice. Download the Oxygen app on the App Store or Google Play, drop in two hundred bucks, and get $25 back. There's no such thing as a free lunch? Well there is now!

Also sponsoring today's show: our friends at BetterHelp. For a secure, online, private, and professional counseling experience, you ain't gonna do any better than these guys. BetterHelp is affordable as all get out, and they have financial aid available to boot. Best of all, no uncomfortable waiting rooms! We hate waiting rooms don't we, gang? Well if you want to show your support of banning waiting rooms across America, check out BetterHelp today. Get 10% off your first month of anytime counseling at BetterHelp.com/yks.

This week on YKS Premium: Bloody Marys with Tim Kalpakis!

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Episode 191: The DumpStore Mar 09, 2021

Today on the program we're figuring out what type of sitcom can never be "canceled" (one that's never made), the reason Magic: The Gathering cards aren't treated the same as gold and other precious metals (because they're dorky little cards) and why it's so darn cheap to go on vacation to world class resorts (they're fake). And so much more they won't even let me write it in this damn descripsht! Tough word to abbreviate there but I did my best. And that's all anyone can ask of me, forever and ever! Bye bye!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Exec Producer PBostrom.

YKS is sponsored by the fine folks at Manscaped. Oh my lord, it's March Manness already? Who ya got in your bracket? I think Joe Biden's gonna go All The Way! Alright enough bullcrap. Check out Manscaped.com and use promo code YKS at check out to snag 20% off and free shipping. I tell you what, you might think I'm bullshitting you but I got the Manscaped cologne and it's better the cologne I was using before. They did a good job with it. You're gonna like the way you smell, I guarantee it.

And ya can't forget about HelloFresh. Seriously, I can't! Believe me, I've tried. They're stuck in my dang head all day long. When am I gonna get another box of precisely-portioned, healthy and delicious ingredients dropped on my doorstep? Best thing for me to do would probably be to go to HelloFresh.com/yourkickstartersucks12 and use code yourkickstartersucks12 to get 12 free mealsand free shipping. They make good food!

And check out the YKS Premium Patreon please. Thank you.

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Episode 190: We're Not Political Mar 01, 2021

We've all been there. Sitting around in our early-30s (or late-30s, depending on which guy it is), trying to decide if we're going to be James Bond or Ross from Friends. Some of us are still deciding! And it's ok to take lots and lots of time to do that. I really believe this! On today's show, Jesse gets electrocuted through the computer screen, Mike abandons a bit, and there's an absolutely wild, you-have-to-hear-it LIVE scramble to turn the 5-pack into the 6-pack we all know and love. Plus we got fake doctors, fake soundbars, fake COVID-19 cures.....and TWINS!!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Exec Producer PBostrom.

YKS is sponsored by people like you. Wow! Remember that old PBS ad they used to have on TV? Well, we are exactly the same as PBS. Support the show by checking out the YKS Premium Patreon, where we just finished up the roller coaster ride that was Jessuary and are running headfirst into Normal March. $5 a month gets ya a shitload of ad free episodes and onto the YKS Pisscord. Another $3 gets ya a 5th ep and much more. Check it out, and thanks for supporting the independent journalism of the YKS family of brands. "YKS, It's PBS."

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Episode 189: It's A Woman Thing Feb 22, 2021

Ohhhh folks! It's another episode of YKS. They keep doing these things so hopefully you'll keep listening to 'em. On today's show, we are in our Juice Groove trying to figure out what's the deal with cutting boards Jerry Seinfeld voice, enjoying objects d'art instead of watching the Idiot Box, and celebrating our Queen Nancy Pelosi with a bizarre gift that not even that nasty old wretch could enjoy. I figure, hey, unless you're a big time surgeon slicing people open and putting all kinds of stuff in there, you can probably listen to the show while you work. And you know, honestly, even those guys gotta take smoke breaks sometimes so get them in here too. It's fun for the whole family (minus the kids, grandparents, most parents, people who like church, board game guys, crypto currency investors, and the normal serotonin having crew. So basically just for dogs.) It's YKS: The Show For Dogs.

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Exec Producer PBostrom.

YKS is sponsored by BetterHelp. Go to BetterHelp.com/YKS to see why 1,500,000 people are going on there to get professional counseling services. Hey I'll save you some time. One reason is they don't have those stinking magazines you get at the in-person counseling office. Yuck! Who wants to read that junk? Not me. I'll stick to never reading anything for basically my entire adult life, thank you very much. It's 10% off at BetterHelp.com/YKS, so that's basically where I'd go if I were you.

And we're also brought to you by the folks over at HelloFresh. Let me tell you something about HelloFresh, brother. There ain't no better way to get simple, fresh meal kits delivered to your house. Oh, and it's good for the environment, oh and it's healthy, oh and...and..and...somebody stop me, I'm going crazy for HelloFresh! Anyhow the food is good, and you know because I ate it (I only eat good food). Give 'em a whirl at HelloFresh.com/yourkickstartersucks10and use the promo code yourkickstartersucks10 for 10 free meals and free shipping.

Last but not least, folks, we've got the YKS Premium Patreon feed. If you've ever wanted to get on there and see what happens when Mike and JF let their hair down, there's no better time to do it than right now. We're getting close to the thrilling conclusion of Jessuary 2021, an event unlike any other. Come and see what the likes of Jon Gabrus, Sarah Squirm, and renowned pilot hero Sully Sullenberger have to say about some of Jesse's favorite dumb guy flicks.*

*Certain guests cut for time

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Episode 188: Jessuary Year 2 Episode 3: League of Extraordinary Gentlemen with Jon Gabrus Feb 15, 2021

All the characters from all the different works of literature come together with everything for a HUGE MOVIE! We're joined by one of the only guys on the planet who loves ridiculous movies as much as JF does, Jon Gabrus, to discuss when podcast guys are your actual friends, not reading too many books ever, and how bad it feels when some guy builds 8 boats if all you ever built was 1 boat.

Check out Gabrus's pod Action Boyz at https://www.patreon.com/ActionBoyz

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Exec Producer PBostrom.

YKS is sponsored by Betterhelp. Go to BetterHelp.com/YKS to find a professional, affordable counselor you can talk to over the computer. 1.5M people are already on there talking to counselors on the computer. Hell if you put that on TV it'd be some high ratings. Obviously they aren't going to do that, due to it would violate privacy. TV is kind of bad now anyway. I'm over it!

And if you liked this episode of Jessuary, we've got even more available on the YKS Premium Patreon. This Friday, Sarah Squirm returns to review the Jeff Bridges/Ryan Reynolds dead buddy dead-em-up, R.I.P.D.! Here's a preview: Sarah hated it!

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Episode 187: B. Creamy Feb 08, 2021

Truth, Dare, or Spoon! Oh my god, I guess I'll go with SPOON! Hahaha. Oh sick there's mayonnaise in here...Yuckeroo! I can't wait til my 39th birthday tomorrow haha. That's just one writer's guess at what's going on in the living rooms and dens of annoying glasses wearing guys around the country. Also on today's show we've got the debut of 3 new characters: Mr. Food, Flip Flop Farrar, and The Michael Jordan of Coins. Probably couldn't find that many characters in Kanji, the adopted logographic Chinese characters that are used in the Japanese writing system. We also have an update on a stupid fuckin thing that squirts goo into your banana. So that's something to look forward to. Alright I'll see ya in there gang.

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Exec Producer PBostrom.

This week, YKS is sponsored by Hello Fresh. This is the place ya wanna go if ya want fresh, easy meals delivered to your door. All you have to do is say, "Hello!" Try em out with the Official YKS Discount at HelloFresh.com/yourkickstartersucks10 and use the promo code yourkickstartersucks10 to get 10 free meals and free shipping! Oh baby! Taste the flavors!

We're also brought to you by Manscaped. Now, the Lawnmower 3.0 is what the whole world is talking about, but they sent us some of their cologne and it's actually crazy good. It smells like cologne, you know, I don't know what the scent is. But I put it on and walk around my house knowing that I smell pretty decent. That's about all you can ask for from a cologne, I think. Not gonna fix the whole world but got a good sniff to it. Anyway when you go over there use promo code YKS please -- this helps the show out and it also helps out your groin area!

Jessuary continues over at the YKS Premium Patreon: this week, don't "Fuggedaboutit!" cause we've got a great episode. Chris James, Rob Whisman, and Stefan Heck are on to discuss Frank D'Angelo's 125-minute long card-playing drama Sicilian Vampire.

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Episode 186: Remote Daddy and Dirty Dawg Feb 01, 2021

Covid-19 sucks so bad....I really want to put my crap on it. No, I'm serious. I want to wipe my butt with Covid-19!! Yeah!! I'm going to do this. I think I'll do it. And I'll tell other people to help me do it...to put my butt on Covid-19. Sick of this guy! We presume that is the thought process responsible for bringing "Fuck Covid Toilet Paper" to the world, but hell I don't know, I just read the stuff. I barely wipe my ass with any of the products we make fun of on here. Anyway also this week we have a new thing to make video chatting even more lame and annoying, an app for stopping fake restaurant reviews with the power of QR codes, and a way to keep hold of the GOD damn remote, which should be in the same spot every time. Why the fuck is it over there! Fuck!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Exec Producer PBostrom.

It's a big week, and I mean a BIG WEEK on the YKS Premium Patreon, folks! It's the start of Jesseuary Year 2, and we're kicking it off with a big, destructive monster who, despite his frightening outward appearance, is actually a gentle giant whom I love very much. I'm talking about Godzilla. Makes sense. And the guest is our friend Dan O'Sullivan who, come to think of it, I'm quite fond of as well. Join us for this kickoff mega episode on 2019's King of the Monsters and stick around all month long for some more great Jesse Movies and guests.

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Episode 185: Tug & Bean Jan 25, 2021

Oh, you know we're buzzin! It's YKS baby! On today's show we've got the first-ever DOUBLE update on an old Kickstarter...some crap from the past, but twice! And of course the new crop of crap is here as well, on a big silver platter on a white linen covered table with wheels like you get in the fancy hotels. Oh boy I hope there's one packet of catsup and a very small container of too-hard butter in there. Either way it's going to be worth at least $95. Even if all that's there is a billboard yelling at DC politicians (in St Louis), an Inception-like look at the sovereign citizen movement, and a penis mobile. Plus a couple of emails, some voicemails, and about an hour of two guys goin "Now what in the darn heck is this!"

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Exec Producer PBostrom.

The YKS Premium Patreon is litty!!!! That doesn't feel good to type that, so you gotta know how much it really is popping off over there. This week, we're heading back to What The Fund World to find out what the hell is going on with all the crap we've bought on Kickstarter recently, and to figure out what kind of crap we need to buy in the future (not good!) And next month we're kicking off Jesseuary, with a slate of great guests and stupid ass movies only a Jesse could love. And there's only one place to hear it...say it with me now! The littiest place on Earth! YKS Premium!

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Episode 184: Wango Dango Fla’mango Tango Jan 18, 2021

Yeee-haw! That's what I'd say if I were a big Texas cowboy type of guy. And here's another character I've been working on: "The Butler". Hello, ma'am. Welcome home for the evening. Your gown is in the foyer. I have a lot of these guys I never really get to do on the show because we're always talking about Kickstarter stuff. Which I guess is what I should be mentioning right about now. Oh well. Today on the show we have a new cube to talk about, which is great, even though I didn't get to do my Mad Scientist character. He goes like, Mwah haha haha. And we also have a Grumpy Cat LEGO type of thing. I did not have a character for that one, but I can make up one now. It's called, like, Clock Man. Well it looks like it's time to stop doing this character. Ok that was pretty good for being on the spot. There are some other Kickstarters on there too but basically just know there's like very little if any character work this week but next week Mike said we can do a lot more ok see ya.

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Exec Producer PBostrom.

Hey if you like us and you like our friend and frequent guest Chris James of Not Even A Show, you're probably gonna wanna take a peek at our new show Good Morning, Good Morning. It's over on Stitcher Premium, which is a different website to get our stuff than normal. That's because the show is not your typical YKS. We've put on our writing and acting and directing hats and planned out a stupid little world for our idiot characters to get fucked up in. And we've got some great guests on there as well: Nick Wiger, Carl Tart, Brendon Walsh, Longmont Potion Castle, and a bunch more of our friends drop by to fart around. So check it out and use promo code SUCKS for a nice discount off the top.

Plus, on YKS Premium this week we've got the return of YKS Classic Segment Real or Fake...will Mike show his ass once again or, will he for some reason, triumph over the impossible odds of guessing correctly which dipshit products I have made up? Hey, either way, listening to him try is half the fun. Actually it's all the fun for you. There's no other fun than that. Listening to us is all the fun.

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Episode 183: Even Sharper Image Jan 11, 2021

2020 was one hell of a year...emphasis on the HELL part! Still, I'd love to relive it for some reason with a half-assed board game. And if that gets boring, maybe I'll head over to the gaming PC to boot up some warmed over shit from circa-1999 Newgrounds Flash barf. Even though neither of those things sounds that good to do, I'm still going to do them. If you want to stop me, you're going to have to tone up your butt muscles, slap on your Billionaire Suit, and hit the Prayers App. Cat Toilet. Couldn't work in the last one but getting 5 in there is not too shabby. Get in here you old dogs, it's time for YKS!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Exec Producer PBostrom.

YKS is sponsored by NordVPN. If there's a faster, more convenient VPN service, they sure haven't told me about it yet. Use promo code YKS at NordVPN.com/yks for a steal of a deal on your next Netflix-juking, Chrome-extending, data-shredding VPN subscription.

Oh boy, and after all that, there's still YKS Premium comin' out every Friday. This week on the program we have our friend Chris James joining us to talk about our new Stitcher Premium show Good Morning, Good Morning, pitch some new prank calls, and run through the Jokeblogger Top 10. Now that's what I call a Premium Experience!

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Episode 182: Success IdeaThink Jan 04, 2021

It's 2021 everyone, where everything is good again. We still have to do the show though, so sorry about that! This week on the show we're talking about the long-awaited crossover between NES games and the world of Pawn Stars, a mask for people who want to look like a big egg, humping Disney characters, and using your balls as a penis. Plus we're one-upping the 100 Ideas list from a while ago with an even bigger list of even worse ideas. There are like 4000 of these things. They are terrible. Here's one: "A zip that if left unzipped for more than 1 min starts screaming" -- What's that? No idea. They aren't really too much better than that one on average. Anyway that's 2021 for ya folks so get in here before we start hating this one too.

Music for YKS is courtesy of the Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Exec Producer PBostrom.

This week's YKS is sponsored by HelloFresh. Hey you gotta eat anyway. Might as well eat HelloFresh. Try 'em yourself at HelloFresh.com/yourkickstartersucks10 and use promo code yourkickstartersucks10 for 10 free meals including free shipping. Now that's lot of free bleep!!!

Plus we got our friends over at Manscaped. Do your penis a favor for once and buy it Manscaped. New Year, New Penis! Get 20% off and free shipping at Manscaped.com with promo code YKS.

Of course we've got YKS Premium as well, which is good for folks who need even more YKS content. This week on the show, Producer Dan finally joins us in the YKS DigiStudio for a watchalong of Gun Safety for Women, another entry in the Cool Cat Cinematic Universe. This one really sucks and it was brutal to watch. So come listen to us do that for ya, and check the YKS Pisscord (Discord) for more info!

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Episode 181: Who Wants To Be An Extreme Millionaire w/ Blocked Party Guys Dec 29, 2020

It's the end of the year as we know it....And I feel fine!!! It's from a famous song! It's a parody! Look it up! When it comes to finishing up the HELL YEAR!!! you know we had to do it big: deleting the episode we actually recorded by accident, then scrambling to replace it with the Premium episode we recorded the week before, and not having a plan for how to replace that. But you know what, I think it worked out pretty good.

That's right, we brought our friends from Blocked Party back to see if they can redeem themselves after a pitiful performance on YKS Millionaire last time around. Did they do it? Did they win the million? Or did they bring shame to their family and podcast and Twitch streams once again? Also is Blippy there for some reason? Yep! Hell of a show, and a hell of a couple guys. Even Producer Dan is in on this one. What da!!!!

Music for YKS is courtesy of the Hell Yeah Babies, Craig Dickman, Howell Dawdy, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Exec Producer PBostrom.

This week's YKS is brought to you by NordVPN. In my opinion you would have to be certifiably insane to use any other VPN service. Hey man get in that padded room, or if you want the best VPN experience around, take it from your friend JF and head on over to the website I'm talking about. Plus, use promo code YKS to get 4 months free with a 2 year subscription. And that's the bottom line!

And coming up on the YKS Premium Patreon this week, oh my god I hope we think of something cause this was supposed to be the show! Fuck!!!

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Episode 180: YKS Premium S12E3: Miketober Episode 3: The Dead Zone with Mark Brendle: The YKS Cut Dec 21, 2020

Hey gang, it's the YKS boys' annual week off, so we're bringing some YKS Premium content out of the vault for your enjoyment. If you haven't heard this classic ep yet, you are in for a treat. And if you have, well, it's still a treat! Plus, feel free enjoy the brand new intro at the beginning. Or not! Either way, our friend Mark Brendle joins us to talk about The Dead Zone, a very weird little movie from the twisted mind of Stephen King that has, dare I say, become very relevant in the last couple of months. It's a great choice by Brendle and I think we learn a lot as well as having a good time. Short of hanging out with Neil deGrasse Tyson, I don't think you'd find a better way to combine those two things than this episode. Happy hall of days every one, and we will be back with some 100% new shit next week. Cheers,

Music for YKS is courtesy of the Hell Yeah Babies, Craig Dickman, Howell Dawdy, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Exec Producer PBostrom.

This week's YKS is sponsored by Wipers123.com. It's a great site to get windshield wipers for your car, I can tell you that much. I put some on my car and it took like 1 second. It says up to 30. But mine was only 1. Maybe even a half. Don't believe me? Ok hotshot. Head on over to Wipers123.com and use promo code YOURKICKSTARTERSUCKS for $10 off orders of SpeedSets.

Plus, we've got a good deal for ya on HelloFresh. There's only one problem: you're gonna get a lot of money off your order. Wait a minute, I just realized that's good! Just go to hellofresh.com/yourkickstartersucks80 and use promo code yourkickstartersucks80 for, you guessed it, $80 off and free shipping. Hello, fresh! That's what I would say to it.

This week over at the YKS Premium Patreon, we're taking the day off from all-new, instant-classic content. But we will be re-releasing the Squeeze Louise tier Miketober ep with Bakkoon and Simon Barrett, on They Live, along with another cute little intro. (And Squeeze Louise heads, don't worry, the end of year mailbag is coming soon). Thanks everybody for supporting the show and keeping me out of the Google Docs Resume Template hell I was in for a while. We hope you have enjoyed at least some of the stuff we're doing. And more fun shit to come I assume!

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Episode 179: Kicksucker 2077 Dec 14, 2020

Imagine a futuristic world where everything is basically the same....except there's, like, some pink graffiti around and maybe a robot zips by carrying some food. What moral implications would that have, on our society...and what would YOU choose to become? More importantly...who cares! It's another YKS folks and this time we've got a video game about being Jesus (but you probably don't get any cool powers), the worst innovation in underwear history, and a robotic salad trailer idea from a young man trying his best to make it in this crazy world. Oh and did I mention there's a bunch of LED lights and ripped jeans everywhere in this new world...this seems insane! And it's a ways into the future but not too far away. So. Still pretty interesting. Not as interesting as Futurama though. Anyway that's the program and please enjoy it. Thank you.

Music for YKS is courtesy of the Hell Yeah Babies, Craig Dickman, Howell Dawdy, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Exec Producer PBostrom.

Today's YKS is brought to you by NordVPN. There's lots of reasons to have a VPN, and if you're gonna get one, it might as well be NordVPN, the one I've used before. Use promo code YKS to get 4 months free with a 2 year subscription.

YKS is also sponsored by BetterHelp. Mental health is some classic stuff. Now you can get some without going to an office. Give that a whirl with 10% off your first month at Betterhelp.com/yks.

And coming up on the YKS Premium Patreon this week, we've got: Is Mike Smarter Than a 5th Grader? For up to $50,000 of Nickelodeon and John Cena's dollars, can Mike successfully remember what 2 + 2 equals? Well the questions aren't that simple but they're not very hard either. Tune in to find out! And to not listen to the ads and so forth. If you want.

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Episode 178: Merry Karenmas Dec 07, 2020

You're not gonna believe this, gang, but we were able to pull it together for another episode. This week on the show we've got a tactical scarf, the secrets behind the American flag revealed, a Karen drinking game, and a nasty porno about fucking the President. And that's just the good stuff! Kidding...I'm kidding! Relax. Plus we recap the biggest story of the week, when I watched Home Alone and kept track of which guys got hurt the most. It's another day ruined by the jerks of football, but we power through and give you guys the best episode of YKS in December so far. It's no problem at all though. Keep the change, ya filthy animal!

Music for YKS is courtesy of the Hell Yeah Babies, Craig Dickman, Howell Dawdy, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Exec Producer PBostrom.

Today's YKS is sponsored by Manscaped. Hey just because we call it "our junk" doesn't mean we treat it like junk! I pitched this to them and they didn't like it. That's ok! I think it's good. Get 20% off and free shipping at Manscaped.com with promo code YKS. Maybe tell 'em you like my slogan too?

Also sponsoring today's program is School of Hustle, a GoDaddy podcast. Remember the GoDaddy commercials? Me too. Well, this is different. It's a podcast, and it's on Apple Podcasts and the rest of the places podcasts live.

And don't forget the YKS Premium Patreon. This week we got our friend SexJ to talk Uncle and Neighbor stuff and to hit us with the SexJ NFL 1000 Dollar Picks of the week! He's a cool guy and I'm glad we got to talk to him. Download the episode on Friday (SOMEbody's birthday, but to be clear it's not him or Mike or Dan) and check him out at Twitch.tv/sexualjumanji

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Episode 177: The Return of Goovis Nov 30, 2020

Well, Thanksgiving is over, the Holiday(TM) Tree is up, and that darn tryptophan is finally wearing off! Time to dig in to some leftovers, aka some stupid crap from a website. On today's program, we've got what we all need this year, some funny socks! Plus, a simple way to defeat the purpose of wearing a mask, a new robotic friend that we'll just have to bury eventually, and of course the return of an old friend. Damn they brought Saved By the Bell back! That's not the friend I'm talking about. It just came up while I was writing this and I paid attention to it like a dumb dog. Actually it derailed me by about 10 minutes. Gotta turn the TV off while I'm working. But I won't! Enjoy the episode folks and turn the TV off while you're listening!

Music for YKS is courtesy of the Hell Yeah Babies, Craig Dickman, Howell Dawdy, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Exec Producer PBostrom.

This week's YKS is sponsored by NordVPN. Region locks on content are a pain in the nuts, right? So kiss 'em goodbye with NordVPN. Head over to NordVPN.com/yks, and grab yourself a 2 year subscription with 4 free months by using promo code YKS. Cool.

Today's episode is also brought to you by BetterHelp. Folks, ya gotta have good mental health. And when it comes to talking to a professional counselor, it's hard to beat doin' it from the comfort of the ol' La-Z-Boy. Try 'em today for 10% off your first month, at BetterHelp.com/YKS.

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Episode 176: Barf Boulevard Nov 23, 2020

Episode 176 is here....that's huge. That is a huge accomplishment. Plus there were probably a few we lost along the way. And then the bonus episodes on top of that (plus the ones we lost there). God. That's probably, I don't know, what, the equivalent of 56,000 shows or so? Lot of mileage on these lungs but they just keep on tickin', I'll tell you what. And still no 100th episode celebration in sight. Well for this week's show, Mike has picked the Kickstarters so you know what that means: it's just stuff he wants me to buy him. Will I buy him any of it? Will he make it subtle that he wants me to buy it? There's only one way to find out: download and listen 10 times in a row on all your different devices and through a variety of IP addresses! That's a joke, relax. Unless you're just bored or whatever....

Music for YKS is courtesy of the Hell Yeah Babies, Craig Dickman, Howell Dawdy, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Exec Producer PBostrom.

This week's YKS is sponsored by GoDaddy, a fine place to buy a website. Well, they've also got a podcast called School of Hustle. Makes sense, right? So check that out.

Today's show is also sponsored by HelloFresh. I do love going to the store but sometimes it stresses me out and makes me go nuts. So a big box of ingredients coming to the house works out pretty nice. For $90 off, go to HelloFresh.com/yourkickstartersucks90 and use the promo code yourkickstartersucks90. It ships free too but the $90 off seems like the bigger deal to me. I had some really good pita from there.

Ok folks I'm not gonna lie to ya, I'm tired of typing. So I'll merely say: check us out on Patreon for bonus episodes and more "you know what". Thanks!

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Episode 175: Clunky Tongs Country Nov 16, 2020

Ring ring....hello? Yes it's the YKS War Room. Yes, our refrigerator is running. Why do you ask? Oh crap, you're doing a prank on us. Well, just so you know, the NEAS Secret Service is listening in on all these calls, so. And we've been crying in the bathroom all day as well. On today's show we've got some funny little calls, which you probably guessed! Plus, some new brain hacks for memory keeping, a new kitchen gadget that sucks, and one of the all-time freaks from hell is back with another stupid ass movie. That's basically our crazy ass show, thanks for coming to our weird little section of the internet. Hope you had fun. And if you got too freaked out, I'm soooooooo sorry. NOT.

Music for YKS is courtesy of the Hell Yeah Babies, Craig Dickman, Howell Dawdy, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Exec Producer PBostrom.

Ding a ling a ling! It's the YKS Sponsor Bell! Today's episode is brought to you by Wipers123. I wouldn't buy windshield wipers anywhere else, even from the cute little kid with the "Wipers 25 cents" sign set up at the end of my street. I don't care how backwards the letters are! Wipers123 is, quite simply, going to stomp him out of existence. And good riddance! Show the windshield wipers industry that all you care about is the best product and quickest installation on the market by using promo code YOURKICKSTARTERSUCKS and get $10 off your order of SpeedSets wiper blades.

Hey! Welcome to the Patreon plug portion of the episode write-up. We're back to normal over there, so everyone who hates movies can safely return to receiving a shitload of bonus episodes, newsletters, ad-free regular eps, merch discounts, voting for us to buy desktop toilets, and so forth. And on this week's YKS Premium, we've got....uhhh!!! Wait a minute!!! It's a movie episode! That's right, we've got a commentary track for Kickstarted movie and all around weird guy situation Cool Cat Saves The Kids. This shit is totally psychotic and we'll bring ya along for the ride. So go check that shit out if ya want!

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Episode 174: The People Trumped Ronald Plump Nov 09, 2020

Brian and Ed, you beautiful sons of bitches, you finally did it. You -- We --Trumped Ronald Plump at last. Now to enjoy the next four to eight years of peaceful, social justice oriented, climate conscious stewardship from our trusted progressive ally, Joe Biden. Heh. Anyway also on today's show we've got what is hopefully the last word on ironic red hat co-opting paraphernalia, Cooking For Men about 10 years too late, and a DOA exercise product even JF's tiny, pathetic ass couldn't make use of. That's pretty much the whole show so go listen to it now, before the world gets really really good and you don't have time to download podcasts anymore!

Music for YKS is courtesy of the Hell Yeah Babies, Craig Dickman, Howell Dawdy, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Exec Producer PBostrom.

Hey today's episode of YKS has two sponsors. Very nice! My wife! The first one is Manscaped, our old friends. They've added a ton of new stuff, including an ear & nose hair trimmer...and some cologne?? Cool. Use promo code YKS to get 20% off and free shipping over there.

And for our second sponsor, we've got a...New sponsor alert! It's Curiosity Stream! There's so many documentaries on there we doubt you'll ever need to watch scripted, fictional content ever again. That stuff's fake! But not the award-winning exclusives & originals on Curiosity Stream, featuring such luminaries as Sir David Attenborough, Stephen Hawking, and Nick Offerman. And here's an offer-man for our listeners: Use promo code YKS to get a whole year of Curiosity Stream on your iPad, iPhone, or iDontKnowWhat for just $14.99! There's some stuff on there about how capitalism is a big bummer too, so check that out.

And yeah we're still doing YKS Premium as well! Check us out on Friday to help decide which stupid piece of shit we have to buy for the show! 538 says It's probably going to be the Burger Buddy. And those guys are pretty good, so.

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Episode 173: Avatar Status Nov 02, 2020

Checking in with Justin Bieber's pastors...Talkin' Blue Guys....The War on Christmas begins...and finally, David Hasselhoff returns to the stage. Obviously we want you to download and enjoy this episode today, but hell, tomorrow might even be a good day to put some earbuds in and tune everything out. Put it on your bluetooth speaker or pass your mopey, ironic brother the aux cord and crank up YKS for the whole neighborhood to hear. Maybe that's what will bring us all together! Doubt it, but if you don't try, someone somewhere might get mad at you! That should motivate ya! Ok in all seriousness thanks for listening and sorry for what I said in this episode about the movie Halloween, which does suck but I'm still sorry about that.

Music for YKS is courtesy of the Hell Yeah Babies, Craig Dickman, Howell Dawdy, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Exec Producer PBostrom.

Hey don't forget to check out YKS Premium. October Miketober was a great month, with 6(!) bonus episodes of guest and movie magic over there for our supporters, and November will be even more stuff and things as well. So if you like the sound of that head over there and plunk down a couple bucks and get a million more hours of stuff to listen to and think about. Thanks!!!!

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Episode 172: Kick It Under The Fridge Oct 26, 2020

Too Many Doggos? Is there EVEN such a thing? Well, some Fun Haters around the web think so. Let's get em!! We will be spending as little time as possible on Reddit-like terminology such as that, and as much time as we can possibly justify on why I'm right that all chain pizza is scientifically indistinguishable. Plus, we've got the next generation of Ice Cube Technology, a thing seemingly designed for fast food guys to review shit in their car, and a movie that manages to be so stupid that it's not even funny to watch. And finally, the return of an old friend. If you're used to falling asleep to the show or not listening all the way through because it's too boring, or leaving it on for your dogs while you're at work, change it up this time and catch the whole thing. I wouldn't lie to you. I swear to god, you gotta believe me!

Music for YKS is courtesy of the Hell Yeah Babies, Craig Dickman, Howell Dawdy, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Exec Producer PBostrom.

There are a lot of podcasts out there but they all seem to record indoors. What's up with that? Well comedians Andrew Michaan and Cole Hersch have figured out a different way to do it: Outside. Check out their show Podcast But Outside to see why the way we're doing it ay YKS (indoors, not even close to each other, barely paying attention) is a relic of the past.

And if some indoors podcasting is still ok with you, we have had a great month of YKS Premium over on the Patreon feed. Come join us before Miketober is all finished up and you'll get to hear up to 5 episodes worth of classic Mike Movie riffs with some great guests. This offer also extends well into the future so there's really no urgency whatsoever. We're not gonna delete the episodes. But what if we did?

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Episode 171: King Kong Vs. America Oct 20, 2020

That's how we do it in Margaritaville, son -- a normal thing to say that I have said and will say moving forward as well. On today's show we've got a Donald Trump doll that looks like a....what???? Plus a new type of headgear, an app just for pasta, a device for making your dog's kibble look even less appetizing than normal, and of course, a stupid card game made by unfunny dorks. And that's pretty much it! Doesn't seem like it would take that long to read 6 things but by God it does. So sit back and relax, tell Alexa to play "some of my favorite boys", and enjoy the show.

Music for YKS is courtesy of the Hell Yeah Babies, Craig Dickman, Howell Dawdy, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Exec Producer PBostrom.

This episode of YKS is sponsored by Wipers123.com....you would be criminally INSANE to buy windshield wipers anywhere else, or without the promo code YOURKICKSTARTERSUCKS for $10 off your order of SpeedSets.

For more YKS, check out YKS Premium on Patreon. You already know what time it is! It's Miketober of course, and we've got a lot of good shit over there. They Live with Simon Barrett and Oliver Leach, Return of the Living Dead with Matt Christman, and coming later this month...Slugs with Bill Corbett. Hell of a lineup, hell of a show, and whether you like these spooky movies or have never seen 'em or just hate having $5, you're gonna be happy with the decision to hook it up over there and support the show.

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Episode 170: Slippy Slide Ride Down Tube Canyon Oct 12, 2020

It's time to sue Mike, everyone! He loves sandwiches and it's time to take him to the cleaners, woodshed, and poor house. On today's show we've got a new frontier in tea drinking completely SMASHED, your notions of the wisdom of staying strapped on the beach DESTROYED, and best of all we've got America finally BROUGHT together at last by pictures of, what else, feet. It's a hell of an episode featuring nothing to get mad at us about, so there's no need to try. I'd suggest simply sitting back, relaxing, and vibing!

Music for YKS is courtesy of the Hell Yeah Babies, Craig Dickman, Howell Dawdy, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Exec Producer PBostrom.

This episode of YKS is sponsored by Manscaped. That same great Lawn Mower 3.0 experience we all know and love stateside has finally gone international! Check em out and get yourself a nice groing experience by going on over to Manscaped.com and using promo code YKS for 20% off and free shipping. Don't pay for shipping! Use the code! It's important to do this!

For more YKS, check out YKS Premium on Patreon. All month long, we're inviting some very special guests on to help us celebrate Miketober, an investigation into the wild, wild world of DB's favorite films. It's the opposite of Jesseuary in every way: the movies are creepy, classic, and even watched by everyone appearing on the show! Coming up this week we've got The Dead Zone with our friend Mark Brendle, and next week I believe we'll be doing Return of the Living Dead with Matt Christman. Pretty cool!

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Episode 169: Donald, It's Time To Go Oct 05, 2020

The episode is now up! Check out EXIF data, it's really real! On today's show, Mike and JF take you through the political news of the week and break down what you need to know and what you don't, plus just kidding who cares.

We've really got for ya here some goofy Kickstarters: a COVID-19 flirting paddle (???), a service for renting a chair for $15, a troubling surgeon who seems to believe in aromatherapy, the worst possible way to walk your dogs, and much more. And if you've read this far send us an email to read on the show, or at least let us know what your cube score is! It's yourkickstartersucks@gmail.com. That's where you send it.

Music for YKS is courtesy of the Hell Yeah Babies, Craig Dickman, Howell Dawdy, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Exec Producer PBostrom.

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Episode 168: Crow Porno Sep 28, 2020

Would Italy be so good at designing boots if the country weren't shaped like a boot? Can any other explanation properly account for all the sexy leather coming out of the old country? On today's show we endeavor to find out, by using different types of research and asking tough questions of those in power. Just kidding...who cares! We've got the next evolution in wet vacuuming, fruit preservation technology, and the service that combines the surveillance state and app dating at last!

Music for YKS is courtesy of the Hell Yeah Babies, Craig Dickman, Howell Dawdy, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Exec Producer PBostrom.

And hey don't forget this. YKS is sponsored by Manscaped. Go to their damn site, now available outside the US, and grab 20% off plus free shipping with promo code YKS. Just that simple. Name of the show. It's right there. Don't forget it.

Finally, for more YKS, check out the YKS Premium Patreon! This month on YKS Premium we finally have the long-anticipated Miketober. Join us and special guests from across the internet to explore some of the most terrifying and shocking films from Mike's Special Collection. I think there's somehow 5 fuckin Fridays in October too, so this is a great time to hop on the Patreon if you haven't yet.

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Episode 167: Sprrrip! Record Scratch! Sep 21, 2020

Hey everybody have you seen my balls they're big and salty and brown! Ohhh Chef! We miss ya pal. Rest in Peace. And of course our friend Ruth Bader Ginsburg has got to do some resting as well. Got a big show today gang, so don't forget to listen to the whole thing, front to back. And hell, when you're done, spin it back for another go. The campaigns on this episode are all over the place....we've got some politics campaigns that really miss the mark, some really crappy vaporware tech, and a couple of people that mean well but whom we thoroughly destroy anyway! That's it, that's the show, and hopefully it will put a big smile on your face in these crazy, crazy times. And if not, keep in mind our email inbox is always open for you to say what you don't like about the show or us personally, etc.

Music for YKS is courtesy of the Hell Yeah Babies, Craig Dickman, Howell Dawdy, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer: PBostrom.

This episode of YKS is sponsored by Wipers123.com. If you need windshield wipers for your car and are going anywhere else on Earth, you are literally insane. Stop goin' nuts, and use promo code YOURKICKSTARTERSUCKS for $10 your order of SpeedSets. That's a special type of wiper blade that really kicks ass.

Hey and for more YKS, check out the YKS Premium Patreon. We got a big month coming up....OCT-ober....can you think of anything we might be doing in THAT month? It hasn't been announced yet but just think about it with your brain! It's gonna be great. Sign up now and listen to our other years of bullshit in anticipation.

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Episode 166: Is This Your Handwriting? Sep 14, 2020

Well folks, the freaking Hell Earth is on fire once again, we have a knockoff Cheeto in the White House, and on top of that, my damn Cowboys and Bucs lost! Is there truly no respite for the weary....is there no balm in Gilead??? Well, no. Not like I'm gonna move to Gilead anyway. Instead I'll be here with you all, talking about a children's book (for adults), an app that will disrupt the economy (as soon as it makes sense), and a joke product (hell, unless you wanna buy it!).

Music for YKS is courtesy of the Hell Yeah Babies, Craig Dickman, Howell Dawdy, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer: PBostrom.

Hey, you like comedy, right? Well sure you do, that's why you're here. So why don't you check out our friends over at Office Hours? You know all about Tim Heidecker, Vic Berger, and DJ Douggpound, but forget those guys! This week on Office Hours we're getting a big bucket of sloppy treats for our ears with the return of Morning Madness on WOHL -- with Heidecker, The Shovel, and Skunk. Catch it September 17th on the Office Hours feed!

This episode of YKS is sponsored by MyBookie. Sports betting is a fun thing to do. Hell, I've done it. And I've done it at MyBookie as well. Whatever you wanna bet they're gonna have ya covered over there. Check em out at MyBookie.com and use promo code YKS to double your first deposit. And don't forget to send your buddies at YKS some of the winnings. Haha. Just playin. Unless...?

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Episode 165: Handmade by Grandmothers Sep 07, 2020

Holy crap, you guys! It's another YKS. This week on the show we're finally making the Bible cool (even though it was pretty cool already!), finding the upper limit for sock pricing, and of course playing Cocaine: The Game. Don't forget to bring a...holy crap you guys! Don't forget to bring a pair of headphones to listen to the show on! Holy crap....I'm seriously!

Music for YKS is courtesy of the Hell Yeah Babies, Craig Dickman, Howell Dawdy, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer PBostrum. Oh yeah!!

Today's YKS is sponsored by Manscaped. You know the drill with these guys. They got razors and salves for your nuts area. And they're pretty good! Use promo code YKS to get 20% off PLUS free shipping and tell 'em my penis sent ya.

And for more YKS, check the Patreon page out. This week we're bringing back the movie commentary format with a fresh look at 2016's Kickstarter failure/social media rom-com FML! That's on YKS Premium, out every Friday. So check that shit out!

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Episode 164: President TikTok Aug 31, 2020

I am the LunchBorn, Master of the Midday, Knight of the Noontable, and heir to the Sandwich Throne. My sword is LunchKeeper, The Hunger's Bane, The DeliKiller, a salt-sharpened blade forged in the fires of a dirty Oster microwave. With it, I smite the villainous Growling Tummy and banish him from the Workrealm.

Today on the show we've got a bunch of crap. Check it out.

This week's YKS is brought to you by MyBookie. The NFL season is about to begin, and I'll tell ya what, you sure can bet on it at MyBookie. I've done it before, and I'll do it again! It's fun! Week 1 is almost here and if you wanna get a parlay, supercontest, or hell, just a classic bet against the spread going, sign up at MyBookie and use promo code YKS to double your first deposit. Now that's what I call a touchdown.

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Episode 163: God's Autograph Aug 24, 2020

If we've said it once, we've said it a thousand times: stop whackin off to us! On today's show we've got a great bit based on something I found on my desk (don't skip ahead to it, let it come naturally; worth the wait), plus sort of the classic set-up of the show: 90 minutes long, not too many silent parts, Mike plays a fart sound at some point. Anti-Covid t-shirt, Trump Against Humanity, a nasty pimple popping thing, a psycho lady's dog talking to her, and more! Only on YKS. "YKS. Where else ya gonna find it?" #YKS #WhereElse

Music for YKS is courtesy of the Hell Yeah Babies, Craig Dickman, Howell Dawdy, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer PBostrom.

For more YKS, check out the YKS Premium Patreon. People are always asking us, "Where do you come up with your crazy ideas?" Well, we mostly do it on YKS Premium. That's where the true seeds of wacky ingenuity take hold, and you can be a part of it yourself with just $5. Enjoy movie commentaries, bonus Kickstarters, great guests, and I believe Mike takes his penis out in one episode as well -- only on YKS Premium -- "It's the Preem!" #Preem

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Episode 162: Mike Forgot To Title The Episode Aug 17, 2020

Oh no! It's almost time for the big episode to come out and we don't have a title! Let's see, let's see...I know I had a list of great episode titles around here somewhere. The Grouse of Mouse? Doesn't make sense. Fries with That? No, should have used that for the Doughboys ep. Poop Olympics? That's great but I think we already used it. Dang it! We don't have time for this. I'm just going to have to go with the next thing I pull out of the big Title Hat. I hope it's good, or people are gonna be really mad at me and not Mike for some reason. Okay. It's time. Here goes nothin!

Music for YKS is courtesy of the Hell Yeah Babies, Craig Dickman, Howell Dawdy, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer PBostrom.

This episode of YKS is sponsored by Wipers123.com. These folks take windshield wipers so seriously, it's actually hard to get them to focus on anything else. Hey, c'mon! I thought we were ordering food! What do you want? Are we doing Greek again? That kind of thing. But at the end of the day, we all gotta eat. And we gotta get wiper blades, too. So, my suggestion: try a vegan place (good for environment?) and head over to Wipers123.com, and use promo code YOURKICKSTARTERSUCKS for $10 off your order of SpeedSets. That's one of the wiper blade kinds you can get there, and from what I understand, they're pretty good. Anyway don't forget the promo code. Thanks.

Also, check out YKS Premium on Patreon for more YKS -- ad free eps, up to 5 bonus eps a month, 4 newsletters, store discounts, whatever you could want basically.

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Episode 161: The Ultimate Shoedown Aug 10, 2020

Thank you! For! Your! Service! The undisputed Song of the Summer is here and, no, the singer didn't even have to talk about their "you know what" being "you know what". Hear it first on today's show before anywhere else, because no one else has the guts to play it! We treat you right (Dairy Queen). Plus: we slay some bastards, finally find a way to carry our fishing pole around on our motorcycles, and fill some guitars with liquid for whatever reason. Damn. That is awesome. Most importantly, DB says 2 things wrong that we will never let him forget. Let him hear it on twitter: @dogboner

Music for YKS is courtesy of the Hell Yeah Babies, Craig Dickman, Howell Dawdy, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Exec Producer: PBostrom

Hey and for more YKS, check out YKS Premium on Patreon. $5 a month gets ya 4 exclusive episodes a month, and $8 a month gets ya 5(!), plus a weekly newsletter and more. It's a good thing (Martha Stewart).

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Episode 160: Actually For Helping Aug 03, 2020

Hey, we're helpin' over here! That's right folks, it's another week on Earth which means another YKS has been uploaded to everyone's desktop PCs for their fullscreen listening pleasure. This week on the show we are figuring out how to interact with the police safely, paying to hear a weirdo's dreams, and sucking on a pen with our big slobbery mouths due to anxiety. Plus at least 3 additional things are said throughout the episode. Download this one now while you still can! It's a collector's item that will only increase in value! This episode is an investment for your and your children's future! I really believe this!

And for more YKS check out YKS Premium on Patreon. Last week we had our friends Dril and Derek from TruthPoint on and they tried to win a bunch of money. Did it work out? Well you'll just have to listen for yourself. Or ask them if you want. But maybe they won't reply, or maybe they'll lie to you. Easier to just do my thing, I think.

Finally, this episode of YKS is sponsored by Manscaped. Hey if your shit is looking like that Black Crowes album cover (Amorica I think) then check out Manscaped. They ship to Canada now, and it probably comes in a bag like the milk they love so much up there. I wasn't just guessing about the album cover, I actually had to look it up. I don't listen to the Black Crowes. Just a small confession there. Here's another one: Manscaped's Lawn Mower 3.0 is really good, but it would be even better at 80% of the cost (hey what wouldn't), which is why we forced them to provide a discount code for our listeners. For 20% off and free shipping, smash in the promo code YKS at check out.

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Episode 159: Cow of Bunga Dudes Jul 27, 2020

Hey...have you ever wanted to surf? Well grab a board and hang ten brah! It's a gnarly podcast ocean out there and we're just trying to catch a wave....Sheeaahhh man! Alright enough of that. It's time to post the show. This week we're toasting our phones, enjoying the new Drill (same as the old Drill?), and finally trumping Trump with -- what else -- song! Come along with the boys and remember the bad experience of going to a water park as a kid, plus answer the question all capitalists want to know: What's in your wallet? Tubular! Ran out of surfing guy stuff to say, sorry.

Music for YKS is courtesy of the Hell Yeah Babies, Craig Dickman, Howell Dawdy, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

For more YKS, check out the YKS Patreon. Hell, if you didn't skip the ad in the show, you heard me say it already. But if you're one of the 15 second skip jockeys, here's the deal. $5 gets ya 4 bonus eps a month. $8 gets ya 5 eps, 4 newsletters, merch discounts, and a box of custom injection-molded Mike and JF figurines (with realistic articulating legs and gun attachments).

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Episode 158: The Art of Chug Jul 20, 2020

Welllllllllllll, well it's The Big Show! That was the entrance music of a wrestling guy from a number of years ago, but today we've got an episode of a podcast that could arguably go by the same name. That's because on episode 158 of YKS, we'll be introducing some products to you that might be able to make a real difference in your lives! Haha just kidding. We're going to talk about a penis board game. But there's also smart diapers, a joke of the day calendar for the terminally ill, and a product that promises to shave up to 1.2 seconds off the amount of time it takes to chug a Simply Alcohol (TM) Mango Wango Hard Sparkling Rosé Smoothie. Finally! That's time I can now spend explaining to my kids why the COVID-19 virus deserves all As.

Music for YKS is courtesy of The Hell Yeah Babies, Craig Dickman, Howell Dawdy, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

Today's episode of YKS is sponsored by Wipers123. They've been selling wiper blades for so long they've gotten to be pretty good at it. I've got some here at the house, and in my opinion, I don't know how you'd do it any better than Wipers123. Don't believe me? Fine. I don't care. For everyone else, go to Wipers123.com and use promo code YOURKICKSTARTERSUCKS for $10 off your order of SpeedSets, which sounds like a very fast type of windshield wiper.

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Episode 157: The Earth is Cake Jul 13, 2020

Naming the episode after a throwaway joke that will be dated by the time people hear it, not to mention years later...Winning! On this episode of YKS, we're reinventing late night television, the way people talk about weed, and in-car video content. Don't miss this episode, folks, the one they're calling "The Episode That's Out Today". It's gonna be yuuge (Donald Tump!.)

Music for YKS is courtesy of The Hell Yeah Babies, Craig Dickman, Howell Dawdy, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

For an ad-free version of the show, up to 5 bonus episodes (and more!!!) check out YKS Premium on Patreon. Hell of a deal. Hell of a deal.

Today's episode of the show is sponsored by Manscaped. It's a nice thing to get if you'd like to have your nuts trimmed up and good-smelling, so check that out if ya want. For 20% off and free shipping, go to Manscaped.com and use promo code YKS.

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Episode 156: Return of the Doughboys Jul 06, 2020

Your Kickstarter Sucks so bad, we didn't even talk about it! This week on the show, we welcome back the Doughboys Nick Wiger and Mike Mitchell for a crowdfunding-free discussion of Star Wars, Labor Day, and of course, strokin' your "thing". Plus, the so-called "food experts" compete head to head with DB in the contest of wits with a confusing rule set and inconsistent question structure we're calling FoodPardy! (Jeopardy! ha) All that and more on today's YKS. Check it out.

Music for YKS is courtesy of the Hell Yeah Babies, Craig Dickman, Howell Dawdy, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

For more YKS, subscribe to YKS Premium. $5 a month gets you 4 bonus episodes, and for $3 more you can add a weekly newsletter, merch discounts, and an exclusive 5th bonus episode every month. Normally we put the guest episodes over there, but sometimes we'll switch it up and do this. Never can tell with us. Tricky! And that's what makes it so much fun.

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Episode 155: Just Throw It Away Jun 29, 2020

Hey what if Mr. Magoo was walking around in today's times? It's not that difficult to imagine. Folks we've got a long episode today...almost as long as my hair has been getting due to quarantine! And it's just about as good, too. Smack that play button for some classic jokes, goofs, and smart stuff to say, as well as little Canadian pokemon guys, a new stupid mask type, a bad board game, and more.

Music for YKS is courtesy of The Hell Yeah Babies, Craig Dickman, Howell Dawdy, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

For more YKS check out the YKS Premium Patreon page. For five bones a month, you can get 4 bonus episodes, which, hey, that's great. Stop there and nobody's gonna fault ya. But step up to the new Squeeze Louise tier of support and enjoy an exclusive 5th bonus episode and a weekly newsletter featuring more info on these piece of shit Kickstarters. Not bad!

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Episode 154: Happy Daddy's Day Jun 22, 2020

Happy Daddy's Day Everyone Who Cares! On today's show we have a brand new character from DB, "Mikey the Centrist", plus fixes for the great problems of our time: deadly virus pandemics, police brutality, and gender neutral piss pans. Wow! I sure hope social influencers and politicians and the Illuminati are listening to this so we can get some shit done!

Music for YKS is courtesy of the Hell Yeah Babies, Craig Dickman, Howell Dawdy, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

Today's YKS is sponsored by Wipers123. They're a company that sends you windshield wipers for your car. We got some and they seem to be pretty nice. Prices seem reasonable as well. So I would say if you need windshield wipers for your car, or if you know someone else who does and you are getting them windshield wipers as a gift, a smart thing to do would be to go to Wipers123.com and use promo code YOURKICKSTARTERSUCKS to get $10 off your order. Check out The Typhoon SpeedSet wiper blades with quick-click technology. Sounds pretty good. And don't forget the promo code there. Alright. Thanks.

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Episode 153: Uber For Help Jun 15, 2020

Live from New York, it's.....YKS? What if that's what it was? Heck I don't know but I think it would most likely change from Weekend Update to Weekday Update. Due to, well, that's when the show comes out for one thing. And that's just one change. I might do some other ones, but of course I haven't really had much time to think about it. What, with everything going on in the world and all that stuff. I guess I'd also make it not Live anymore, just in case we have some mess-ups we want to take out. That way you get as good of a show as we can deliver, every time. And I'd do it during the day as well.

Anyway, this week on YKS we have some Kickstarter projects to talk about, including both a half-assed new social media site and a niche Cards Against Humanity ripoff, as per usual, and then 4 other ones of indeterminate interest. Then several more minutes elapse with seemingly no new information conveyed, and the show ends. Please enjoy.

Music for YKS is courtesy of the Hell Yeah Babies, Craig Dickman, Howell Dawdy, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer PBostrom.

For more YKS, check out the Patreon page please. On there we've got YKS Premium, of course, and we've also got YKS Da Mag, the official weekly newsletter of Your Kickstarter Sucks. Check it out for tips and tricks, behind the scenes info, and exclusive scoops you won't find anywhere else. Just playing. It's me and Mike talking about whatever.

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Episode 152: The War At Home Jun 08, 2020

The US Postal Service brought to a screeching halt by widespread rioting and looting...Psychological warfare on our nation's sleeping-in citizens ramps up dangerously...Some news articles are too difficult to skim...Fixing the healthcare system with but a simple T-shirt...All that and more on today's YKS, an episode that's up on time and very full of many minutes of talking! Now that's what we call "fulfilling our duties as part of an implicit promise"!

Music for YKS is courtesy of the Hell Yeah Babies, Craig Dickman, Howell Dawdy, and Mark Brendle. Additional research (if any of them made you mad) by the dastardly Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Executive Producer PBostrom.

This episode of YKS is brought to you by Manscaped. They got some good stuff over there as far as trimming up your shit goes. Check it out at Manscaped.com and use the promo code YKS to get 20% off your order and free shipping. Cool.

Want more YKS? Well, you have to go to the Patreon page and sign up! We're not going to send more of it to a bunch of people who don't want it. That would be a violation of the CAN-SPAM Act of 2003. This week we're breaking down the Kickstarter episode of Family Guy, watching some YouTubes, and showing Weird Al how it's done with some song parodies of our own. Plus a new round of campaigns to support on What The Fund?!?!

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Episode 151: OJ's Place Jun 02, 2020

New schedule of YKS! How it's going for you so far? For us, it's going very well. Nobody asked! Fine! On today's YKS, we say goodbye to some beloved Nashville establishments, continue the pop culture conversation around #ReleaseTheJesseCut, and plumb the intellectual depths of sexual coffin scenarios. Plus, an update on butter tech, finally figuring out who the good cops are, and bringing values back to country music. What a jam-packed episode....I scarcely believe you could come up with a better way to spend 90 minutes. I overheard a very learned scientist saying that about the show. And I trust those guys, don't you?!

Music for YKS is courtesy of The Hell Yeah Babies, Craig Dickman, Howell Dawdy, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

Hey if you want more YKS, head on over to the YKS Premium Membership VIP Area and download yourself some bonus episodes. You might hear us talking to Sarah Squirm, or our friends John and Stefan from Blocked Party, or it might be an episode where we sit down and suck on a big long noodle and end up kissing in the middle. But now! You also have access to ad-free YKS, the YKS newsletter, the YKS discord and much (kind of) more.

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Episode 150: To Catch A Vibe May 25, 2020

Hey, it's Monday....what the...???? Haha. That's what you sound like right now. First of all, relax. Calm down. It's a joke. Actually, it's not a joke at all. It's real and it's the future of YKS. We're doing Mondays now, alright? Try to keep up.

This week on the show Mike and JF are talking about Donald Trump's big wet booty hole, the Problems with Movies (numerous), and some vicious hand to hand combat between members of the expanded YKSiverse. It's pretty good and plus, it's on Monday, which is nice as well. So check it out.

Music for YKS is courtesy of The Hell Yeah Babies, Craig Dickman, Howell Dawdy, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

This week's episode is sponsored by Wipers123. I'm tellin' ya what, if you need windshield wipers for your car, Wipers123 seems like a good place to get 'em. And ya might as well use promo code YOURKICKSTARTERSUCKS for $10 off while you're there. If you need new wipers on your car, I mean. Which....maybe you do! I don't know!

YKS Premium returns on Friday.

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Episode 149: M.I.C.H.A.E.L. H.A.L.E. May 19, 2020

On today's YKS...The first use of italics in an episode description that I can recall, so that's big news. Plus! Should we be celebrating the vulva? Many people are saying, "Yes! With a book!" Thankfully, our friend Lil' Evan is here to save the day. And we've got so much more than that....we're talking about the Jetsonification of breakfast, we're talking outer body experiences, we're talking bad usernames, we're talking DOG SHIT. We got it all today baby. Tune in or get tuned up.

Music for YKS is courtesy of the Hell Yeah Babies, Craig Dickman, Howell Dawdy, and Mark Brendle. Additional research is courtesy of Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Let's all hit the dab for our friends who make the show possible.

Now that was a damn good episode. What was your favorite part of it? Let us know by emailing in: Email@email.com. But if you're not subscribed to YKS Premium on Patreon, you're missing out on (approximately) half the Mike and JF shenanigans you could be getting every week! Last week on YKS Premium, comedian and Real Housewives apologist Sarah Squirm rang us up to talk about Jackass stunts and be subjected to a Quarantine Edition of the Jokeblogger Top 10. It was pretty good! And now this week, we'll be doing another episode. It won't be as good, but, you gotta understand, people are busy right now. So that's why probably.

Finally, this week's absolutely cool and kick-ass episode of YKS is brought to you by Manscaped. Now look you don't need me to tell you this, but they make good stuff, and if you wanted to try the whole thing out and help your buddies at YKS out in the process, you'd go to the website and get the stuff and use the promo code YKS to get 20% off and free shipping. Yeah they'll let you check out without it but I wouldn't recommend it!

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Episode 148: Armchair Neuroscientists May 12, 2020

Paint drying may be the famously boring thing to watch happen....but what if you only listened to the part that happens before you even get to paint! That is today's episode in a nutshell, as Mike and JF discuss the finer points of drywall repair, the disease of serial inventorship, the great democratization of sub-South Parkian animation software, and political protest poems (with fiddle accompaniment). Bye Bye Virus!

Music for YKS is courtesy of the Hell Yeah Babies, Craig Dickman, Howell Dawdy, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

YKS Premium this week is a doozy....Mike and JF are joined by the very nice and funny Sarah Squirm to talk about reality TV bullshit and do the JokeBlogger Top 10. It's very stupid to subject your good guests to this! But that's what you have to do sometimes, if you want to (???) and (???). Anyway check it out. On Thursday, when it comes out.

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Episode 147: Get The Led Out May 05, 2020

A smarter butter dish....innovative design...a magnet to hold the included knife. If only life were this simple! Some would say that it is, and those people are making lots of money selling products online. On today's YKS, we actually talk about some of these crazy products, with a bit of a critical eye, to let you, the skeptical consumer, learn something, or whatever. And that is how you make a show.

Music for YKS is courtesy of the Hell Yeah Babies, Craig Dickman, Howell Dawdy, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

This week on YKS Premium, the debut of an all-new YKS Premium Special Event Series: Rubbish Lads. Mike and JF's tour through the sordid world of British Trash TV. First up is Naked Attraction, a show featuring 6 nude contestants and one potential date to judge their balls and asses and cooters. They got some good TV over there folks, so let's enjoy it together.

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Episode 146: One For The Road Apr 28, 2020

Ohhh now this is so nice. It's another episode of YKS. This week on the show, I didn't take too many notes during recording because we were having such a good time. So that right there should tell you something. But it says here on the official episode outline that we talked about a Covid-19 coin, a combination cup + bluetooth speaker, and playing cards that, let's just say, the average simpleton won't be comprehending anytime soon. That would be enough, matter of fact, it would be MORE than enough than many people deserve now of days, but we did even more than that. And you'll have to listen to the episode to find out what, if anything, I am talking about. Thanks everyone. For doing what I said.

Music for YKS is courtesy of the Hell Yeah Babies, Craig Dickman, Howell Dawdy, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

Today's episode is sponsored by Manscaped. For 20% off and free shipping, use promo code YKS at check out. Pretty good. Gotta use the promo code though. Otherwise I can't help ya.

And as always, you can find even more YKS on the YKS Premium Patreon page. There's some good stuff on there. Of course, not every single thing is great. We're not batting 1.000. But it's like Christmas. You get a few good ones and the other ones can sit up in the attic for a while. Or you throw it away. Maybe one of em is exactly what you needed. That's why YKS Premium is like Christmas, which was, if I remember correctly, the question.

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Episode 145: The Bug That Got Away Apr 21, 2020

Headed on down to South Park gonna have myself a time....oh damn! It's the South Park Guys. Carman and everyone. They are here and they are ready to equal opportunity offend. But First! Nearly 90 minutes of two sad guys in their houses going "Uhh". On today's show we've got stupid snack innovations, more coffee trash from the coffee trash heap, some virus cash-ins, and a few things Mike pretends to actually like for some reason. So, again, get through all that and we will have you back with Kenny and The Gang in no time, finding out how he died, assuming they still do that thing. Which I'm pretty sure they do, unless the guy who does the voice for him became a Scientologist. Alright. Enjoy the (South Park) show.

Music for YKS is courtesy of the Hell Yeah Babies, Craig Dickman, Howell Dawdy, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

Hey for more YKS check out YKS Premium on Patreon. Not gonna twist your arm about it but you might like it. I don't know. What other kind of stuff do you like?

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Episode 144: Goblin Behavior Apr 14, 2020

Hello everyone, it's Mike and JF here and it's time to transition from the introduction part of the show notes to the early midpoint of the show notes. Wow we're already here. This is awesome. On today's show we're talking about the same stuff as usual, but with some very slight differences. We've got stupid shit for kids, condescending board games, cynical cash-ins, insane ramblings (and not just from the hosts!), political points of view exposing much of the population as foolish babies, and some dumb inventor guy. We even fit more stuff in there as well, but I find that listing it all out takes a lot of time and I don't think anyone reads this except the little Google robots that scan text to put in ads. So hello to our friends the Google robots. Please enjoy the show if you possess the higher order thinking required. Not all that high really.

Music for YKS is courtesy of the Hell Yeah Babies, Craig Dickman, Howell Dawdy, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

For more YKS, check out YKS Premium ONLY on Patreon! This week, we've got another classic crossover episode with our friends from Blocked Party, Stefan Heck and John Cullen. Tune in to hear their minds melt as they attempt to solve a series of psychotic puzzles from another dimension (multiple choice questions about sports) in the YKS Who Wants to Be a (Multi-) Millionaire Challenge! That's right folks, this intercontinental rumble is for all the All-Dressed Tostitos. Plus, whenever those turds put up their bonus episodes, we're on there as well!

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Episode 143: Mike's Way Apr 07, 2020

Ohhhhhh!!! Another one! This week on YKS, Mike and JF are talking sex tapes, dick pics, wasting your life, and some actually maybe kind of okay (?) Kickstarters? Maybe that was a mistake. But we have to go do some other shit now so this is the ep, and we are Boss Bitches so deal with it!!

Music for YKS is courtesy of the Hell Yeah Babies, Craig Dickman, Howell Dawdy, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

For more YKS, including the incredible Munch Madness and Barf Madness tournaments, check out the YKS Premium Patreon. Every single fuckin week one of these things goes up on there. So if you want to, go give us a little cash and listen to em. Thanks.

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Episode 142: Goovis Young Mar 31, 2020

Oh no they did another YKS! It's a remote episode of course, which is fine. On this week's show we're trying out new intros, NOT going to the store, and doing hammer violence. It actually is remarkably similar to a normal episode of the show, which is either good or bad depending on if you like the show normally or not. Either way, you can't deny that it's here now. And it's better than going outside and licking stuff.

Music for YKS is courtesy of the Hell Yeah Babies, Craig Dickman, Howell Dawdy, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

For more YKS, check out YKS Premium on Patreon. That's the nice place to go if you want to support the show and get more stuff from us. And since everyone's sitting around all bored, we unlocked two episodes for the gen. pop to check out, both sports episodes with our friend Chris James. Get em Here and Here. And thanks for listenin. See ya.

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Unlocked! YKS Premium S5E5: In the Passenger's Seat with Chris James Mar 24, 2020

The YKS remote recording setup is not yet ready to go (we hired the Joe Biden guys), so for today we'll be releasing a classic YKS Premium episode from the archives.

Originally released 2/8/19, this episode with the one and only Chris James touches on the NBA trade deadline (remember when we had sports?) and contains the first review of my rec league hoops performance. Look for Part 2 of that conversation to be released later this week, and as always if you need more YKS on your Pono Player, you can subscribe to YKS Premium on Patreon. Which would rock.

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Episode 141: Dead Butt Syndrome Mar 17, 2020

Well here's a weird one for ya: with Mike Out Of Office, we're forced to go to Plan B: ask the 2 other guys in JF's house to do the show. Luckily, past Jesseuary guest Greg Pollock (@weedguy420boner) and early Go Off Kings Producer Paul (@tinybaby) answer the call to talk about tired asses, the science of funniness, and streaming services for men. Which we need right now more than ever!

Music for YKS is courtesy of the Hell Yeah Babies, Craig Dickman, Howell Dawdy, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

Despite all the bullshit, YKS Premium is still coming your way. so if you're looking for some shit to do, go on over there and sign up and download it please. $5 a month gets you access to over 150 hours of content and a coveted slot in the YKS discord server, where hundreds of freaks and esteemed posters such as ourselves await your vegetable recipes and dog pictures.

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Episode 140: Mask On Mar 10, 2020

Folks we're out of the frying pan and into the fire at YKS HQ, as we (barely) survive a big ass tornado and now must escape a global pandemic while shacking up in the same quarters. So we're prepping ourselves with the best disease prevention campaigns Kickstarter has to offer, from a fake mask thing to another fake mask thing and more. Grab a tissue and check it out.

Music for YKS is courtesy of the Hell Yeah Babies, Craig Dickman, Howell Dawdy, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

This week on YKS Premium, it's Tournament Time! Not content with giving you just one tournament, Mike and JF are doing FOUR March Madness-style brackets this month! To break the seal on this outrageous and original concept, this Thursday YKS Presents: Munch Madness 2020: Fruit Bowl -- 16 new and classic fruits go head to head to see which sweet treat you can't defeat. Go to the store and get some fruit yourself to follow along! Reminder: We came up with this idea!

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Episode 139: Red Carpet Guys Mar 03, 2020

Well it's kind of busy over here today so I'm gonna do a short one of these. Today on YKS we got an update on becoming Real Hollywood Celebrities, and we got 6 Kickstarters to talk about, and we have a story about going to the store. So I hope you enjoy that and we will talk to you next week.

Music for YKS is courtesy of the Hell Yeah Babies, Craig Dickman, Howell Dawdy, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

For more YKS, check out YKS Premium on Patreon. This week, we have the incredible conclusion of Jesseuary, as Chris James (Not Even A Show, you might have read about it in the damn AV Club) joins to discuss Jesse Movie MVP Keanu Reeves' take on the "weird smoking man saves world" genre, Constantine.

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Episode 138: Banana Money Feb 25, 2020

Did like 20 minutes on bananas for this one. Running out of shit to say? No, we are simply scratching the surface of our agricultural and horticultural information base. So, not only all that good stuff, but also: a candle that lights itself (?), a leap forward in toilet cleaning technology, and a very timely movie-based board game.

Music for YKS is courtesy of The Hell Yeah Babies, Craig Dickman, Howell Dawdy, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

This week, Jesseuary: Salute to Bad Films continues on YKS Premium, as we are joined by small weirdo Stefan Heck (Blocked Party, Go Off Kings) to review a movie that I'm not even sure I like: The Happytime Murders!

Plus, if you haven't already got one, go grab a shirt at the YKS Store. It took a long ass time to set that shit up so help me out and go look at it please. Get the tiny minimalist RFID blocking wallet out folks! Ya won't regret it.

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Episode 137: Everybody Shut Up Feb 18, 2020

Sometimes ya just gotta shut the fuck up. Except when you have to do a podcast for work, since it's your job now. So we're talking about some classic Twitter bullshit, things that are kind of jokes and kind of not, bad parenting, and our Minority Report future. Lot of this stuff is "not for me", but maybe you'll like it?? Hell I don't know.

Music for YKS is courtesy of the Hell Yeah Babies, Craig Dickman, Howell Dawdy, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

Over at YKS Premium, Jessuary continues! This week, we have a nice little intermission episode before we get back to the wonderful schlock we all know and love, so hop in there and listen to us talk about movie treats and update the What the Fund project with our next campaign. Next week, back to more crap!

This episode of YKS is sponsored by Manscaped. For 20% off and free shipping, go to Manscaped.com and use promo code YKS.

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Episode 136: Something Normal Dumbass Feb 11, 2020

This week on YKS...we need more emails! An update on the O'Cock Watch! And more! Here are some of the suggestions our Discord gave for the title of the (as yet unheard) episode when I asked: No Signal Mountain 2, Pee Pee Poo Poo, Another One, Breakfast Soup 2, etc. Glad I went with this one. Much better.

Music for YKS is courtesy of the Hell Yeah Babies, Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle. Additional Research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

For more YKS, check out YKS Premium over on Patreon! February is Jesseuary on YKS Premium, where we're taking a look at some unsung classics with some of our favorite friends. Last week, we tackled one of the great Jesse Movies of all time, Pacific Rim, with the great Greg Pollock, and this week we keep the pedal to the (silver!) metal with writer Dan O'Sullivan and the erstwhile Dark Universe fantasy romp Van Helsing. $5 a month gets ya the whole thing plus whatever else we think of, so consider doing that and supporting the program.

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Episode 135: Gimme a Baby Wipe Feb 04, 2020

Here's a family fun idea: listening to YKS! This week on the show we got some cat stuff, some phone stuff, some Trump stuff, and some sports stuff. Remember the Hulk Hogan sex tape? Remember the Masked Singer? Remember VTech? Remember breathing trash gas? We kind of do, for some of it, and for evidence look no further than this episode of the program.

Music for YKS is courtesy of the Hell Yeah Babies, Craig Dickman, Howell Dawdy, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

And hey! Remember the 12 Davids of Lynchmas? The very special series discussing and analyzing the surrealist works of the influential auteur David Lynch? Well we're doing it again, except this time it's about stupid action movies and fart comedies. That's right, it's Jesseuary on YKS Premium! Head on over now, plunk down your $5 and get ready to laugh and cry and fart with JF, DB, some crazy monsters, and a few very special guests.

This week's episode: Pacific Rim with our friend Greg (@weedguy420boner). This guy's so smart he probably has a secondary brain in his ass. Check it out!

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Episode 134: 100% Unhackable Jan 28, 2020

On today's YKS, we got some bad Kickstarters gang. Sound familiar? Plus, JF learns a weightlifting lesson and finds a new favorite Kickstarter. And Mike is there as well (didn't write down any notes on what he said but you know it's good. That's Mike baby! What about Baby Mike, like Baby Yoda? That could be something cool. A little Mike in a floating orb. I've only seen the first episode of the show but the baby is floating in an orb. Let's get one for Mike.)

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Wow!

For more YKS BULLSHIT check out YKS Premium on Patreon. $5 a month ain't shit...come on. You won't miss it! Plus, next month: Jesseuary! A celebration of Jesse Movies, all month long. Check it out.

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Episode 133: Minimalism 2 Jan 21, 2020

Dog poop...man's most hated enemy. Will we ever vanquish this eternal foe? Or will we be overwhelmed and consumed by its hot stink? Plus, unnecessary laundry hacks, multiple water bottle solutions, and the return of an old friend. It's yet another YKS, right now, on your phone while you're trying to go to sleep! Goodnight!

Music for YKS is courtesy of our friends Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

For more YKS, check us out on Patreon. That's where we got all the premium episodes. $5 a month, and there's gonna be 4 of em a month. Last month we watched the films of David Lynch, this month we're sitting around and goofing off, and next month we're doing something else cool. That is a very acceptable amount of things to do, I think!

This week's episode of YKS is sponsored by Manscaped. Use promo code YKS at check-out to get 20% off and free shipping on your order.

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Episode 132: Mister P Jan 14, 2020

YouTube finally corners JF...Mike mourns the innocence of his favorite show, Investigate Discovery...talking to your cyber security service (hey, they called me!), the anti-porno phone and more. Seems like a lot for one show, but somehow we get it all in and have about 90 more minutes to say "how's it going" and "what's up".

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

More great goofs and jokes are available in the 60 minute format at the YKS Premium Patreon page. But you wouldn't want none of that, would ya? Well???

Also you heard it in the ad, but we do have YKS Merch available as well. Put it on, wear it, wash it, whatever. Up to you!

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Episode 131: Porky Pig's Birthday with Nick Ciarelli Jan 07, 2020

We got a hell of a thing here gang: fresh off a big fancy plane from fabulous Hollywood California, comedy writer Nick Ciarelli joins us in studio for an all-new JokeBlogger Top 10 and the first ever (?) 3-man 6-Pack!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

For more YKS, check out YKS Premium. If this link still doesn't work, just go to Patreon and search for YKS Premium. Same thing but they invented links to make it easier to go to places. Sometimes the websites don't make them work though. So that's pretty unfortunate. Hope it's not costing us any money! Haha. Anyway. We're still doing the show there. So thanks for going to it. See ya next week bye.

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Episode 130: RIP 2019 Dec 31, 2019

Let's leave getting cake mixes delivered to you every month, backpack advertising, family exploiting content grinds, diaper schemes, texting other drivers, and lunchboxes of the future in 2019, alright gang?!?

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

For the entire 12 Davids of Lynchmas series, including music by Mark Brendle and Cuggy, check out the YKS Premium Patreon page. If you already do, thanks! That rocks.

Check out Nick's stuff at @NickCiarelli on Twitter, on the latest Comedy Bang Bang (#1 episode of the year...damn), or his UCB show, Atlantic City!

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Unlocked!! YKS Premium S7E2: The 12 Davids of Lynchmas: Mulholland Drive with Struggle Session Dec 26, 2019

Hey, this is from the YKS Premium feed, and it features our friends Jack Allison and Leslie Lee III from Struggle Session. We brought them on to discuss the David Lynch film "Mulholland Drive". We did this because our theme this month is "The 12 Davids of Lynchmas", and the idea behind that was that we would watch and then review David Lynch movies in the month of December, which we did do and are still doing. We're releasing this one for free because we didn't want to do any work this week. If you wanna hear the other ones, please sign up to the Patreon page, because that's where they are. Capisce??? Alright, see ya.

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Episode 129: Booty Mode Dec 17, 2019

Fight...for your right...to sip with plastic! Ironically! That's right folks it's another YKS. And on today's show, we're uncovering the secrets of the human condition: where do we come from, why are we here, how do you create money, and why isn't there a little piece of paper that catches your poop before it hits the toilet water? The answers to all these questions and more, on the free episode of YKS! It's free! Shouldn't be able to give it away! Insane...Actually, criminal....We're doing crimes. Enjoy the crimes.

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Thanks, everyone!

On the 12 Davids of Lynchmas, a podcast gave to me....Marrrkkk Breeennndddllleeee! That's right, our friend and YKS Composer Mark Brendle joins the boys on YKS Premium this week as we head to the mysterious town of Twin Peaks: Fire Walk With Me. Tune in to see what (understandable, in my opinion) mistake JF makes in the viewing of this cult classic! And it's the only mistake as well!

This episode of YKS is brought to you by Manscaped. Tis the season to Manscape, which finally we're allowed to say again. For 20% off and free shipping, go to Manscaped.com and use promo code YKS at checkout. Santa will look at your balls and be able to tell if you are taking care of them! This is part of the canon!

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Episode 128: Museum of Sandler Dec 10, 2019

Well, it's another episode! You can't say it's not. This week on the show we got friggin' sheets for guys, we got friggin' a stupid little box that doesn't do anything, we got friggin', MORE FEMALE GUARDS. Now that's an episode.

Music for YKS is courtesy our friends Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Intern Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

Over at YKS Premium...The 12 Davids of Lynchmas continue! This week: Jack Allison and Leslie Lee III of Struggle Session join Mike and JF to talk about Mulholland Drive. Is this real life....Is this just fantasy....Hell I don't know but it sure is hot! Check it out

Finally, this week's show is sponsored by BlueChew. Check em out at BlueChew.com and use promo code YKS to get your first shipment free (just pay $5 shipping).

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Episode 127: The Judge Channel Dec 03, 2019

The year may be winding down, but YKS sure ain't! I guess. It's another episode anyway. That's what not winding down is. We're not winding down because we put out another episode of the show. You're welcome!!! This week on the show: more toilet stuff, and some stupid apps! Wind that down why don't you??? Fucker!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan. Thanks, everyone!

Hey, it's winter time...why not treat yourself to more YKS over on the YKS Premium Patreon Page? Winter time...time for treats! YKS Merch is also available, and it might have made more sense to say that's the treats, but I already typed it out and the backspace button is way up on the top row. Anyway grab a shirt at the YKS Shop if ya want.

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Episode 126: An Apple in Time Nov 26, 2019

100 good ideas...we'd be lucky to have that many in our damn lifetime. Other people are giving them away for free, like simple trash. This week on YKS, DB digs deep to overcome a serious case of Bird Flu, and JF destroys with logic the endless rituals of Christmastime. Plus: magic toilets, another fuckin water bottle, and CopSucker: The Game.

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle. Additional research provided by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

We're a bunch of damn fools, and we are showing our asses in a big way by giving away BONUS episodes and EXTRA content under the BANNER of the YKS Premium Patreon page. And we look good doing it, too.

BTW, want some shirts? Yeah I freakin thought so!!!

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Episode 125: Worm Burgers Nov 19, 2019

Cops hate YKS for sharing this one trick to get out of a ticket...Remember the Burrito Story...The famous OK Guy Impression from The Simpsons...Buying Slice of Sauce...Inconveniencing your dog...and Praying for brain worms. It's a fuckin banger, folks. Link your brain up to the cyber feed and beep the hell out.

Music for YKS is courtesy of our friends Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle. Additional research by the wonderful Zeke. YKS is now edited by Producer Dan. Thank you Dan!

For more YKS, head on over to the YKS Premium Patreon page. $5 a month gets ya in the door for what seems like millions of hours of YKS bonus content. Wild guests, incredible performances, extra coughing into the mic and farting and telling the dogs to be quiet await you now!

This episode of YKS is sponsored by Manscaped. They make some nice stuff for your nuts and ass. Check em out at Manscaped.com and use promo code YKS for 20% off and free shipping. Damn....that is cool.

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Episode 124: Merry Coffee Nov 12, 2019

It just ain't a Tuesday without YKS baby! What if that bell guy from Monty Python was running around, saying stuff like that. Hey, YKS is here. Whatever he says in the movie. Been a while since I saw it. I guess it was funny, though, because they ended up making all those Hot Topic shirts about it, so. Must've been something. Anyway, today's show is all about Kickstarters. Enjoy!

Music for YKS is courtesy of our friends Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle. Additional research provided by Zeke Golvin. Edited by Producer Dan.

This episode of YKS is sponsored by BlueChew. Check 'em out with a free first order (just pay $5 shipping) when using the code YKS at checkout.

And you just know the YKS Patreon page is always poppin'! Help us keep making the show and treat your own ass to the classic YKS Premium archives.

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Episode 123: The Marshmallow Test Nov 05, 2019

Today we're leaving the past in the past...but not before we apologize for it like the dogs that we are. On this episode of YKS, Mike and JF grovel for your forgiveness before getting into the shit we love to hate so much: ethical traditional shampoo varietals, How To Become A Boomer: The Book, and Super Size Me if it was about chicken instead of chicken and burgers. And you just KNOW that would be harder to do!! Alright enjoy the show. Peace.

Music for YKS is courtesy of our friends Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle. Additional research provided by Zeke Golvin. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

For more YKS, check out our Patreon page. Just $5 a month gets you access to hundred(s?) of bonus hours of YKS content, much of which people are saying is "good". This week on YKS Premium: Our friends from E1, Andrew and Branson. And it really swings, gang. Look for E1 wherever you get your shows. Or here. Or just ask 'em.

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Episode 122: Halloween Soup Oct 29, 2019

Well it's almost practically Halloween, (if you're even allowed to say that anymore)!! And to celebrate, Mike and JF talk about candy for about, I would guess, 3 or so minutes before just doing a regular show after that. Kickstarters, riffing, an email. Commercial in there as well. The whole thing. It's business as usual at YKS HQ...UNusual that is. And Cool Cat is back, in a real bummer of a way.

Music for YKS is courtesy of our friends Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle. Additional research for the show provided by Zeke. Editing by Producer Dan.

For more YKS, check out the Patreon page. This week on YKS Premium, our aforementioned friend Intern Zeke and the wonderful Olga put their Kickstarter Researching Bona Fides on the line for a very high stakes edition of Real or Fake. Next week: Another good one! Wow. What a streak.

Support for YKS comes from Manscaped. They make some good stuff for your nuts over there. So check em out at Manscaped.com and use the promo code YKS to get 20% off and free shipping on your nuts grooming kit.

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Episode 121: A Bug's Death Oct 22, 2019

It's time for the show! New thing I'm trying in these descriptions. Showtime! And it's Episode 121 as well. Mike and JF are here to tell you all about different elements, showering procedures, and I'm just realizing as I'm typing this out, I forgot to do the 6th kickstarter in the 6 pack. So it's a 5 pack this week. Will there be an apology next week? Tune in then to find out! And now, too! To feel invested in the conclusion!

Music for YKS is courtesy of our friends Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle. Additional research provided by Zeke. YKS is edited by Producer Dan.

For more YKS, check out YKS Premium over on Patreon. A brand new bonus YKS every week for $5 a month. That's too cheap. We gotta jack that shit up. I'm not fucking around. It should be like Xfinity. Locking you into a contract. Anyway, this week on the show: friend and fan favorite Chris James of Not Even a Show returns to talk shitty movies and help the boys read Cosmopolitan magazine. Check it out!

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Episode 120: It's So Hot Oct 15, 2019

It's so hot outside that even the skeletons are sweating! And they don't have any skin! Plus it got cold since we were talking about it. And maybe it wasn't even all that hot then. Well, anyway, here's a show about some stupid crap. Happy Holidays everybody!

Music for YKS is courtesy of Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle. Additional research provided by the Weekly Zekely. Here's the review of the EyeQue we discussed as well.

For more YKS, check out the Patreon page. Some good stuff over there. Alright! Enough. See ya.

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Episode 119: Doughboys Scared Straight Oct 08, 2019

Ohhhh mama. The YKS boys stuck their reel out and hauled in a couple of big fish this week. It's Mike Mitchell and Nick Wiger of the Doughboys! There is a lot of nasty talk in this one, including poo poo and wiener stuff, and, well actually that's pretty much all of it. So, hope you enjoy that, and be sure to check out the 2nd part of the YKS x Doughboys crossover coming at the end of the month on their show. Later.

Music for YKS is courtesy of our friends Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle. Cheers.

For more YKS content, including (???) and Stuff, check out our Patreon page. 5 bones a month gets ya even more of the classic shit you love, and all you have to do is give us the 5 bones. Cmon. You'd have to be a damn fool to not do that. What, do you love bones? Get real.

And check out the Doughboys!

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Episode 118: Best Podcast 2019 Oct 01, 2019

This week, Mike and JF have taken a DNA Test and it turns out...they're 100% OH HELL YEAH!! Close the bullshit drawer and tell the dump you'll give it some trash to eat later. Turn on some YKS and restore Earth's quantum energy fields with us...unless you're chicken. Bok bok bok bok...sike!!!

Music for YKS is courtesy of our friends Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle. Additional research for the show provided by Zeke da Freak.

For YKS, check out YKS Premium on Patreon. This week on the show, we bring back the fan favorite (?) Dookie List and talk with a very funny and very metallic friend from the future. And after that, who the hell knows with us....Haha.

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Episode 117: I'm Serious! Sep 24, 2019

Episode 117...most shows would be losing steam by this point, but not YKS. On today's show, Mike and JF are talking getting up in the middle of the night to pee, ugly ass cats, what to do when your vacuum cleaner is totaled, and a little bit more. Clean up on Aisle Funny!

Music for YKS is courtesy of our friends Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle. Research for the show is provided by Zeke. Cheers boys.

This week on YKS Premium, the only show you get at the YKS Patreon page, Mike and JF open some wonderful packages and talk about getting into car crashes. Thanks for listening to that part of the show, where we can let our hair down and get real and not worry about making friends here.

Support for YKS comes from Manscaped. Get free shipping and 20% off with promo code YKS. Put it in the damn checkout box. Where you put the code.

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Episode 116: Kickstarter Sucks Sep 17, 2019

Damn! The internet and the people on it and the stuff it does, in addition to the companies that created and abuse it, sure does suck ass. That's why we're here, doing the show, to explain why it's not good to write "douchebag" on your hoodie, or use YouTube subscriptions to match prospective partners. Because I guess these bozos couldn't figure it out on their own! I don't know! Just kidding, relax!

Music for YKS is courtesy of our friends Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle.

This week on YKS Premium, available to anyone with 5 space-credits per space-month: Writer and friend of the program Dan O'Sullivan joins Mike and JF to try and crack open the famous Charles Manson Nut.

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Episode 115: Poor Sick-starter Mucks Blechisode Buns Spittoon Sep 10, 2019

Hey, I'm a podcaster, get me out of here! That's what you WON'T be thinking during this smash-mouth, mile a minute, or should we say MIKE a minute episode of the beloved improv comedy true crime podcast Your Kickstarter Sucks.

Music for YKS is courtesy of our friends Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle. These guys are the real daily fantasy.

If you have information that could lead to the arrest of the person trying to steal my fuel points, please sign up for YKS Premium (safe). Listen to the dozens of hours of content there, and then circle a number on a receipt and get back to us ASAP.

Finally, Your Kickstarter Sucks is sponsored by BlueChew. Wanna get some discount penis medicine? Use promo code YKS at checkout for a free shipment of the good stuff from BlueChew (just pay shipping).

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Episode 114: The Nightstalker's Lament Sep 03, 2019

Ohhhh our boys are juicin! And we love it, don't we folks? We love the big superheroes and how they save all the crying men. And the coffee! Fabulous. Just fabulous. This week on YKS, we revisit the majesty of Ernest P Worrell, puzzle at the compensation structure of modern national stage acts, and award the Pimp of the Day Award. Now that rocks.

Music for YKS is courtesy of our friends Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle.

And if you'd like to hear more YKS, check out our Patreon page. Lots of good stuff on there. This week, Part 2 of our Huckabee series, with our instant impressions the night of attending the big 100th episode freak show. Huck lets his hair down and so do we.

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Episode 113: Keep Drinking That Garbage Aug 27, 2019

Hey, it's Episode 113. Mind if we fuck around and accidentally make it really long for some reason? This week on YKS: Mike goes Dr. Manhattan and JF digs deep into the offerings on tap at Kid Rock's Big Ass Honky Tonk Bar & Grill. Plus we discuss some of the Mango Mussolini's best tweets, our approach to partying, and getting those beans. Download and listen to this show on this website.

Music for YKS is courtesy of our friends Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle. Cheers guys.

For more YKS, check out our Patreon page where just $5 gets you 4 episodes a month, or an episode per Thursday, but of course some months have more than 4 Thursdays, and some may even have fewer. I really do not know. Coming up on the show: Mike and JF revisit TBN Studios to take in the 100th episode of Mike Huckabee's nasty little goblin circus, plus a brand new segment we're calling "The BTS Hours".

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Episode 112: Happy Frog Clothes Aug 21, 2019

Original YKS: Full Flavor returns with a jumbo episode on the seedy underworld of career inventors, the rising cost of apples, and the great shame of eating dinner. Plus, you know we had to do it to 'em (play the video from an annoying card game). Oh baby! What more could you ask for?!

Music for YKS is courtesy of our friends Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle.

For more YKS, check out the Patreon page at www.patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. This week on YKS Premium, the boys try some Wasabi Kit-Kats and loose leaf tea while thumbing through the mailbag.

This episode of YKS is sponsored by BlueChew. To get your first shipment free, go to BlueChew.com and enter code YKS at checkout. Just pay shipping.

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Episode 111: NickandBradTube with Nick Ciarelli and Bradford Evans Aug 13, 2019

On a very special YKS, Mike and JF put the bullshit to the side to talk turkey with friend of the show Nick Ciarelli and his very funny boss Bradford Evans. You've probably seen their kick ass videos on Twitter, and now it's time to hear them talk about porno and the Krassenstein Bros. Then, later on in the show, two different people come on who we haven't met before. Their names are Xander and Lorenzo (different names, see) and they're Frankie Muniz's managers. They've got a thick stack of scripts to go through and it's up to Mike and JF to decide which ones get to ol' Malcolm in the Middle's table at the big Olive Oil store. And there's a waiter as well for some of it.

For more YKS, hey, well, you heard the ad about libraries in the middle of the show! And understood the point of it. Anyway please check it out. Thanks.

For more Brad and Nick, check out NickandBradTube. I just canceled Netflix for it! Although I could easily afford both.

Music for YKS is courtesy of our friends Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle. Thanks men.

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Episode 110: The Games Episode Aug 06, 2019

Did somebody say games???? Oh baby. You know JF and DB are pullin' up a chair. That's right, we're sitting in chairs this episode...but wait a minute, I'm getting some serious couch vibes from this ep! Uh oh!! Better check it out.

Now that's what I call, the stuff to write in the episode description box.

Music for YKS is courtesy of our friends Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle. Thanks boys.

And for more of our shit, check out YKS Premium. We'd appreciate it, and also you might enjoy yourself. Kind of a good gamble to make there.

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Episode 109: Podcasters in Cars Getting Angry Jul 30, 2019

Damn! Eddie Murphy lives in a big ass house! That's what we're talking about on today's show, plus: stinky dogs, getting your daily fat intake out of the way, swinging a big stick around, and enacting the Frankenstein Protocol. Some really bad Kickstarters on this week's show as well. But hey, that's the name of the game baby! And the game, as usual, is not for the easily offended, OR Safe for Work!

Music for YKS is courtesy of our friends Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle.

Support the show and get over 70 additional episodes of classic content by subscribing to YKS Premium. And follow us on instagram: @YKSPod

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Episode 108: Sleepy Mode Jul 23, 2019

Hey hey hey! Doing the Fat Albert thing I guess. Although I never saw the original...show? Was it a movie? I just saw the Kenan Thompson version of it. Which was funny back then. He kind of did a funny voice on it. Anyway, today's show is all about Kickstarters. And porno from the movies! You don't wanna miss this. I think there was a guy with a lampshade on his head and it was sort of implied that he was drunk??? Oh crap I just remembered it had Bill Cosby in it. Sorry. So, when I said "hey hey hey" I was doing something else. A new thing, that I invented.

Music for YKS is courtesy of our friends Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle.

For more YKS, delete your subscription to Mr Skin and check out the YKS Premium episodes at patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks.com

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Episode 107: Freaks of Fast Food Jul 16, 2019

THIS WEEK: An adult card game (???), a peepee collector, and shoes made out of trash. Plus, the boys take a trip down memory lane with some classic high school memories. Doesn't sound that good? Well, it's either listen to YKS or...freakin' drive a trolley over a bunch of baby puppies eating bacon! Your choice dude!

Music for YKS is courtesy of our friends Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle. Thanks guys.

Want more YKS? Head on over to www.patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks and buy yourself some.

And a big thanks to the history guys over at That Was Genius for sponsoring today's show. Check em out at www.thatwasgeniuspodcast.com

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Episode 106: One Harvard Lane Jul 09, 2019

Eyes getting weary? Back getting tight? How's the traffic on the Queensboro bridge tonight? Who cares, it's time for YKS! On this week's show, we're catching up with Jill Wine-Banks, hating the guts of our inarticulate dogs, and of course we do it all in pulse mode. Come listen to the show critics are calling: "They are talking about cubes again" and "I don't understand the cube thing".

Music for YKS is courtesy of our friends Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle. Check out Howell's new album, "It's Gonna Stink" at https://howelldawdy.bandcamp.com/album/its-gonna-stink

And if you'd like to hear more YKS, head over to our Patreon. $5 a month, a shitload of episodes.

Finally, this week's show is brought to you by Pantheon.io. Need a new hosting solution that's big on ideas? Give 'em a once over at pantheon.io/yks

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Episode 105: Freak of the Week Jul 02, 2019

Jay Leno, eat your heart out! On this week's show: junk from Ali Express, why Mike hates the environment, tearing your neck apart with a mecha-razor, and Juggalo Memories. Like, a full hour of that stuff. So. That's pretty good.

For more YKS, subscribe to our bonus show, YKS Premium, at patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. This week on YKS Premium: From Bad Travel Podcast, Derek!

Music for YKS is courtesy of our friends Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle.

Finally, YKS is sponsored by Pantheon. Check out their fine hosting products available at pantheon.io/yks. Tell 'em Mike and JF sent ya.

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Episode 104: Along Came Mikey Jun 25, 2019

This week on YKS: Porno food, Toilet Games, and lots of friggin' politics! We're gonna get naaaaasty. Music for YKS is courtesy of our friends Howell Dawdy (nee Lydia Burrell), Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle. For an exclusive (?) interview and a preview of Howell's new album, It's Gonna Stink, check out YKS Premium over at patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. And there's some other stuff on there too.YKS is sponsored by Pantheon. Check out their fine hosting products available at pantheon.io/yks

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Episode 103: Normally Titled Episode Jun 18, 2019

It's Episode 103! The one where you title it a normal thing that isn't embarrassing for you to look back on in a year or so. This week we got some great shit on the show...some stuff for your nuts, some chicken things, an ice cream holder. Just the stuff you gotta buy anyway, so why not kickstart it?This week on YKS Premium: YKS Theme maker Lydia Burrell! Check it out this Thursday at patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. His new album, It's Gonna Stink: A Howell Dawdy Joint, drops everywhere this Friday.Music for YKS is courtesy of the aforementioned LB/Howell Dawdy, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle. Thank you friends.Finally, this episode of YKS is sponsored by Pantheon.io. Check out their hosting plans and more at pantheon.io/yks.

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Episode 102: Family Does Matter Jun 11, 2019

I'm on vacation so I don't really want to write a long thing. On this episode of YKS, Mike and JF go on some riffs, and most of em hit. Then they get into the 6 pack, and some of the Kickstarter projects on there you would not believe. I think there's a t-shirt guy. This goes on for some time, and then they read an email. And that is the show! For more of the classic stuff you love, check out patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. Many people are cashing out their 401ks to join. Not necessary, but much appreciated. Music for YKS is courtesy of our friends Lydia Burrell, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle.

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Episode 100: The 101st Episode Jun 05, 2019

It's the 100th episode of Your Kickstarter Sucks!!! Or is it?? For the exclusive guide to making sense of the YKS Expanded Suckiverse (and some episodes where we make our friends watch bad videos) check out patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. Until we start getting ads for the military industrial complex or new snack cookies on here, it's the only way we can keep doing the show. So thanks!Music for YKS is courtesy of our friends Lydia Burrell, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle. We couldn't have done 101 without ya.

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Episode 99: MC Rove May 28, 2019

Well, it's Ep 99 and we're here to say, let's do some war crimes in a hip hop way! On this episode of YKS, Mike and JF talk astral planes, ordering junk from container ships, and bringing this country together at last...with comedy! Plus, a couple of very special drop-ins from our friends the Go Off Kings. Music for YKS is courtesy of our friends Lydia Burrell, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle.And for the sort of, "companion pieces", I guess, to YKS, check out patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. There's more episodes on there, and it is definitely a shared continuity a la the Marvel Cinematic Universe.

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UNLOCKED: YKS Premium S6E3 w/ Bryan Quinby May 22, 2019

From behind the paywall!!! In Part 2 of their journey through the Nick DiPaolo special A Breath of Fresh Air, Mike and JF are joined by Bryan Quinby of Street Fight Radio. For Part 1 with Chris James, and much more, check out the YKS Patreon at patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. Music for YKS Premium is courtesy of our friends Lydia Burrell and Mark Brendle.

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Episode 98: Chips for Free May 14, 2019

Hey...Hey!!!! What if you could get chips delivered to your house!! Or steal an idea from Mark Zuckerberg!!! Or Invest tens of thousands of dollars in a sauce cup!! Well!!!! I don't know!!!Music for YKS is courtesy of our friends Lydia Burrell, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle. And for more one time courtesies, check out www.patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks.

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Episode 97: Semi-Annual Pillows May 07, 2019

Jesse and Mike are the main characters. In the show, Jesse the host and Mike the other host-like, will embark on a journey to rescue their homeland. Through Jesse's and Mike's learnable skills they can overcome many dangers and obstacles. The skills must be bought and learned beforehand.For more YKS, check out patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. And you can go on there, and, I guess, stop porch pirates from taking your paper towels.Music for YKS is courtesy of our friends Lydia Burrell, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle.

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Episode 96: Cotton Buds Apr 30, 2019

JF and DB get absolutely psycho on this track. Check it out. New Kickstarters on it. And a bunch of other stuff, too. There's a desk that's a speaker, I remember that much.Music for YKS is thanks to our nice friends Lydia Burrell, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle. For more ways to feel good, and never bad, and always thinking about how to have fun, check out patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. Thank you.

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Episode 95: Good Soap Kinds Apr 24, 2019

Spoilers for Avengers: Endgame follow.Check out YKS Premium at www.patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks.Music for YKS is provided by our friends Lydia Burrell, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle.

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Episode 94: Wet Hair Son Apr 16, 2019

Sometimes ya gotta just sit back and say, "Damn". And in this episode, you KNOW that's what's up. On today's show, you got Mike takin' his top off, tips and tricks on catfishin' your friends, oh yeah....and a smell helmet. Download it, much? Yeah, I thought so. For more of the cool strains of Star Wars weed (Count Doob-u), check out www.patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. This week on YKS Premium, Mike and JF are joined by the wonderful Nick Ciarelli to talk about the comedy cult classic Vincey Masters.Music for YKS is courtesy of our friends Lydia Burrell, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle.

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Episode 93: Hello I'm Austin Powers Apr 09, 2019

Mike calls in from Parts Unknown to discuss seasoning paradigms, hat fashions, and cheese routines. JF imagines his future hole. And the Orange Man in the White House? Well, I guess he just keeps on tweetin!Plus, hey cmon, check out patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. Lots of people are saying it's good to do it. And it makes you a good person as well.Music for YKS is courtesy of our friends Lydia Burrell, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle.

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Episode 92: The Battle of the Sexy Fart!!?? Apr 02, 2019

That's the title of the episode if your initials are C.T. and you were born on the 15th day of the month, anyway. For all other combinations, well, you're just gonna have to listen up as Mike and JF rake gourd privilege over the colds and get disinvited to several weddings. And there are Kickstarters on here as well. And for exclusive entry to The TomCat Club, check out patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. For about 5 doll hairs a month you can get hours upon hours of dumb guys breathing into the microphone. Music for YKS is courtesy of our friends Lydia Burrell, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle.

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Episode 91: Two Mad Blokes Mar 27, 2019

Have you seen this? Have you heard about this? For millennia, mankind has searched for answers to these universal questions. Today, on Episode 91 of YKS, that search continues.On today's show: Gamer socks, breath bags, a Trump opinion website, free movie tickets, scented panties, and disposable pet food bowl covers. For more of these two little freaks, check out www.patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. This week on YKS Premium: Mike and JF recount their trip to a live taping of TBN's right-wing parody of a late night show: Huckabee Live!Music for YKS is courtesy of our friends Lydia Burrell, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle.

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Episode 90: Lid On, Lid Off Mar 19, 2019

It's time to do the damn thing. Another episode of YKS, why the hell not. Put it out there and see if it goes viral. It's 2019, baby! Which is why you absolutely gotta punch up John Carpenter's atmospheric 1982 sci-fi thriller The Thing with the terrific references of today. Plus you gotta try out some new hubby moves, get some "Toot's" out on a new social media platform, and take a big sip of the tea out of Wario's pimp cup. And if that ain't it chief, check out patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks where for just $5 you can rent the show for one hour every week. This week on YKS Premium: Cait Raft! Music for YKS is courtesy of our friends Lydia Burrell, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle. Thank you.

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Episode 89: My HomiePass Mar 12, 2019

Hey....what's in the freakin' briefcase? Quentin!! Q!! What's in there! Ahhh! It's my wife's head! Or whatever, you know? On this episode of YKS, we've got an update on the scented alarm clock, a book that will finally teach our children American values like "the President is a train", rocks in your bra, and Mike's Official HomiePass. It's pretty good.For more impossible riddles and cryptic puzzles, check out patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. Last week: Real or Fake. This week: The JokeBlogger Top 10! Music for YKS is courtesy of our friends Lydia Burrell, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle. Thanks everyone.

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Episode 88: I'm Telling Ya! Mar 06, 2019

Mike is back from his Pacific Northwest tour, and you'll never believe what he has to say about your home town! Plus, eulogies for Jibo and King Kong Bundy. Music for YKS is courtesy of our friends Lydia Burrell, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle. For more of "Da Good Stuff", check out patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. Thank you.

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Episode 87: No Signal Mountain Feb 27, 2019

The Academy Awards, also known as the Oscars,[1] are a set of awards for artistic and technical merit in the film industry, given annually by the Academy of Motion Picture Arts and Sciences (AMPAS), to recognize excellence in cinematic achievements as assessed by the Academy's voting membership. The various category winners are awarded a copy of a golden statuette, officially called the "Academy Award of Merit", although more commonly referred to by its nickname "Oscar". The award was originally sculpted by George Stanley from a design sketch by Cedric Gibbons.[2] AMPAS first presented it in 1929 at a private dinner hosted by Douglas Fairbanks in the Hollywood Roosevelt Hotel.[3][4]Music for YKS is courtesy of our friends Lydia Burrell, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle.For more on Joan Osbourne, check out www.patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks, where pie IS always a full meal.

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Episode 86: Dear Heaven Feb 20, 2019

Hey everyone, JF here. Writing the description for the show is one of the worst parts of my week so I'm going to take this one easy and just say some stuff in a list, ok? Here goes: Jacked up on caffeine, sleeping with da fishes, marmaduke follies, and Andy Serkis Grandpa. That's a great list. Alright. Glad I did it. Now, for more stuff you can put in a list, check out www.patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. We don't have a big celebrity guest this week, but we do eat some very spicy food. And I think, just based on the way the world is going, maybe that's just as good to listen to. Good Morning Vietnam! That is another thing from my list that I didn't write up there. Music for YKS is courtesy of our friends Lydia Burrell, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle. Thank you.

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Episode 85: Wakey Wakey Feb 12, 2019

Tuck in for some spaghetti and meatbulbs, folks, they did another YKS. On today's episode: Forgiving Paula Deen, Diamondium Blades, and Remembering Your First Beer. We're telling stories better than any writer in Hollywood, so slap that subscribe button and open up the download hatch for some D*AMN good content.And for more from the guys known as the Apple and Bugatti of podcasting by far in 2020, check out www.patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. This week on YKS Premium -- the very handsome and funny Hayes Davenport!Music for YKS is courtesy of our Musical Friends Lydia Burrell, Craig Dickman, and Mark Brendle.

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Episode 84: WYKS The Eagle Feb 06, 2019

With over 60 years combined of going on the computer and posting on it and talking to their friends, Mike and JF are here to give you the absolute best lottery numbers possible (binary), the most incomplete wrap-up of the Krassenstein Reddit AMA possible, and the most hackable way to get packages delivered just outside your front door. For more of these two schmucks getting together and shootin da shirt, check out www.patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. And as long as they didn't break the website, a simple $5 contribution will unlock for your amusement hours upon hours of goofs, gags, and jokes.Music for YKS is courtesy of Lydia Burrell, Craig Dickman, and our friend Mark Brendle.

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Episode 83: Wiger Fever with Nick Wiger Jan 22, 2019

We recorded this one for YKS Premium, our Patreon podcast, but then we forgot to do a regular episode. So now it’s free! Insane…could we possibly get any better at podcasting?? Not likely.Mike and JF dial up friend to all Nick Wiger to talk eatin' big, fucking up, going legit, fucking up, being nasty, and fucking up. Check out Doughboys Live dates at headgum.com/live and hey maybe the YKS boys will show up on 4/11 in Nashville as well. Music for YKS is courtesy of Lydia Burrell, Craig Dickman, and our friend Mark Brendle. And for more YKS, check out patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks, where thank God we had enough episodes in the tank to release this one over here. Coming up this week: Carl Tart!

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Episode 82: Breakfast Soup Jan 15, 2019

We've got a birthday boy!!! That's right, Mike is turning a different age, and we are here for it. On this week's YKS, the Krassenstein bros go stereo mode, we sip some tea and some backup tea, and the institution of the news tries to elbow in to our territory. What da hell...Music for YKS premium is courtesy of Lydia Burrell, Craig Dickman, and our friend Mark Brendle.For more of intern Tyler's misadventures, check out www.patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. With every Netflix price increase, the entire YKS backlog becomes an even better deal. This week on YKS Premium: Sean Clements of Hollywood Handbook calls in from his backyard to talk NBA GMs and help us workshop some jokes.

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Episode 81: That's My Grandma Jan 08, 2019

Buckle up for this one, gang, because it's time to yiff Lou Dobbs. On today's show, Mike and JF are talkin' night stalkin', pissing on your own self, and ripping off Salt Bae. So let's just get your John Hancock on this and you'll be outta here in no time!Hey! Check out the boys' interview with screenwriter Evan Susser later this week at patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks for a very special edition of Real or Fake: Hollywood. Music for YKS is courtesy of Lydia Burrell, Craig Dickman, and our friend Mark Brendle.

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Episode 80: Our Golden Heaven Mansions Jan 01, 2019

Well, Christmas is coming up, and the boys are excited. Tune into this one to find out who's on our Mount Raymores and the REAL Raisin for the Saison as Santa and Jesus vie for Christmas supremacy for the 2000th (?) year in a row.If you heard yesterday's UNLOCKED PREMIUM episode with Jack Allison and liked what you heard, then check it out. There's even more of that stuff at patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. If you heard it and did not like it, then you were just triggered and need a safe space.Music for YKS is courtesy of Lydia Burrell, Craig Dickman, and our friend Mark Brendle.

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UNLOCKED: YKS Premium with Jack Allison (11/29) Dec 31, 2018

Like Jesus moving the big rock out of the cave (?), the YKS boys have temporarily and heroically rolled away the paywall. And so, we now present free of charge to content scrooges and New Year's revelers alike this classic episode of YKS Premium featuring the host of Twitch's hit morning show JackAM and tireless internet imp, Jack Allison. Originally posted November 29th, 2018.

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Episode 79: Less Than A Cup Of Joe Dec 18, 2018

Now this is neat...it's an episode of YKS with Michael Hale and Jesse Farrar. Music for YKS is courtesy of Lydia Burrell, Craig Dickman, and our good friend Mark Brendle.For more affection from Hugbot, check out patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. On this week's episode of YKS Premium, we've got Vietnamese snacks, Cleveland in a Box, and of course, your letters.

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Episode 78: Rag Duty Dec 05, 2018

This episode is so good, it's hard to even put it into words. And I know a lot of words, from having seen them other places + memorized them to use later on, so I'm not just some dumb guy what got hold of a computer. On this record-breaking 78th episode of YKS, the boys are explaining, in great detail, the two types of electricity, the functional dignity of lizard diapers, and the necessity of worshiping Jimmy Kimmel. So slap those cans on and get to laughin'!For more half-angry diatribes on behalf of people who we think once knew the guy who invented the humblebrag, check out www.patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. On this week's YKS Premium, Mike and JF play test Kickstarter's runaway smash hit card game "Watch Ya Mouth". It's bad.Music for YKS is courtesy of LydiaBurrell, Craig Dickman, and the lettered Mark Brendle.

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Episode 77: Bring Bat Boy Home Nov 27, 2018

Hey what if dogs could use the computer, and go online, and be sad like everyone else? What if you could power your phone by just asking someone nearby to send you some battery? What if you could hear from God all day long by simply looking at your phone while you're trying to do some fucking work for once? That, two horrible card games, and much more on this week's episode of YKS. For more yuk yuks and crack 'em ups, check out patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks, where we post another hour a week of classic YKS hijinks. This week we talk to comedy writer and host Jack Allison about kicking ass and taking names online. YKS Premium posts every Thursday right after I feed my dogs lunch. Music for YKS is courtesy of @LydiaBurrell, Craig Dickman, and our friend Mark Brendle.

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Episode 76: Christmas Dice Nov 20, 2018

In what can only be described as a triumph of modern storytelling, Mike and JF convene for the 76th time to discuss crapping with the door open, the blue guys, and some very bad cups. Plus, a new Dookie List!For more abandoned figurines of law enforcement administrators, check out patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. For somewhere around $5 a month, you will receive unlimited (?) access (??) to the entire (???) YKS Premium backlog. On this week's YKSP, the boys try some Japanese ramen sent in by listener Dave, nu metal coffee sent in by listener Olga, and live comment an episode of the very bad Netflix weed show DisJointed. Music for YKS is courtesy of LydiaBurrell, Craig Dickman, and the learned Mark Brendle.

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Episode 75: Thick Yoda Nov 13, 2018

Big boys and big toys. It's another YKS! Today the guys are talking dick sheaths, cheating on your homework, and, unfortunately, a drinking game based on the Brett Kavanaugh hearings. The world sucks ass. But, ya gotta listen to something. Which reminds us.There's even more terrific stuff to pass the time with over at www.patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. A lot of it. And it's just sitting there, rotting. Please....take it home today.With music from our friends LydiaBurrell, Craig Dickman, and Mark "Awoooooo" Brendle.

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Episode 74: The Trial Of Cool Cat Nov 07, 2018

Mike and JF are back in the studio to talk about expired water, anonymous enemies, and the big election. With music by Lydia Burrell, Craig Dickman, and, of course, our good friend Mark Brendle. For more of the BULL HOCKEY, check out www.patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. For just $5, which back in the 1800s was probably worth a lot of money so bad example, you'll get access to hours and hours of bonus Mike, JF, and some other guys occasionally style content. THIS WEEK: The debut of a brand new segment...The 3 pack!

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Episode 73: Sheryl Crow Genius Oct 24, 2018

San Francisco: Where Ideas Take Flight! For more Nervous Horse Energy, check out patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. And thanks to our friends Craig Dickman, Mark Brendle, and Lydia Burrell for the music. Very cool.

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Episode 72: Willful Rules, Crooked Past Oct 09, 2018

Spooky October kicks off with this little ditty you're REALLY gonna love. Mike and JF are talkin' discounted beers, they're talking Grenchell, they're talking offensive phone applications. What else is there? Hell, what else do you need? A plexiglass tray that folds out from your computer monitor so you can eat on it? Ok, fine!Well if you do think of anything else, you can check out www.patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks and ask us and we will see if we can figure it out. Thank you to our friends Lydia Burrell and Mark Brendle for this week's music, as well. Thanks. Thank you. Goodbye

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Episode 71: Mega Lunch Oct 02, 2018

What if all it took to keep our kids safe from gun violence was an app? What if a wildly untalented rapper could ask for and receive $1MM for no clear reason? What if there were big hard wangs in the official emoji keyboard? Mike and JF, the wildest podcast pardners in the west, answer those questions and more on today's episode of Your Kickstarter Sucks. Plus, the return of Real or Fake (Stick Edition), a bunch of chair noises, and your letters. Check out Hollywood Handbook, the insider's guide to kicking butt and dropping names in the red carpet lined back hallways of this industry we call showbiz, on iTunes, Stitcher, or your favorite podcast app. It's one hell of a program. And that's a fact.Also, the vast archive of YKS Premium is available for your listening pleasure over at patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. That money goes straight into my budget for buying boards and screwing them up onto my wall, so I highly encourage you to subscribe today. I need more boards!

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Episode 70: Roundball Rock Sep 25, 2018

Wow! Episode 70! The number some people are saying is even funnier than the one before it. Incredible.Sure, on this episode, Mike and JF talk about Mike's old schoolboy days, draining the swump, and $150,000 audio systems in their friends' houses. But wow...70! Haha. The number of it. Dang.For more Adventures of Josek and CH4RL13 the droik, check out patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. Over 50 references to contemporary Christian Rock await you!Music for YKS is courtesy of Drew Toothpaste, Lydia Burrell, and the smothered, covered, and capped Mark Brendle.

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Episode 69: Pet Bucket Sep 18, 2018

Bus People, Cathouse Appetizers, and Fat Guy Brass Knuckles; this episode's got it all. Thanks. Music for YKS is courtesy of Drew Toothpaste, Lydia Burrell/Howell Dawdy, and the scrupulous Mark Brendle. For more of this stuff, since you love it so much, check out www.patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. At least a couple hours of stuff on there features waify internet dipshit Stefan Heck. And if you like that guy, it might be fun for you to hear him talk some more. It's not just him, though.

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Ep 68: Itchy Face Pizza Sep 11, 2018

Former President Barack Obama joins the boys to talk tan jackets, NCAA brackets, and kicking butt while kicking butts, or how hard it REALLY is to run a country when you just want a hit of that classic stimulant, nicotine. PLUS! Actor Tom Cruise stops by to discuss the Univers(al)-building classic that wasn't, 2017's The Mummy, dish on the L. Ron Hubbard the public never really got to see, and taste test a cronut. Just kidding, it's the same two fat guys talking about the internet. Enjoy.For more bullshit we just make up, check out www.patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. It's essentially the same thing as the free one, but it costs money. Music for YKS is courtesy of Twitter's Lydia Burrell, Drew Toothpaste, and the onomatopoetic Mark Brendle.

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Episode 67: The Mothman Diaries Sep 05, 2018

I'm not uploading this again. If it's not right this time, I quit the show. This is Episode 67. I hope to god. Music for YKS is courtesy of: @LydiaBurrell, Drew Toothpaste, and that old serpent Mark Brendle. For more custom microwave tones, check out www.patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. It's $5 a month -- probably less than you spend on ancient grains -- and you get hours and hours of podcasts that worked when I uploaded them the first time (with no mistakes whatsoever).

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Episode 66: Faded Crows Aug 17, 2018

Pull up a chair and have a couple laughs...Music for this episode of YKS is courtesy of @LydiaBurrell on Twitter, Drew Toothpaste (www.theworstthingsforsale.com) and the twice-distilled Mark Brendle. For more discontinued smart personal hygiene products, check out patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. It's only $5, and you can listen to us review gum. Kind of a hard sell there. But it's good. Anyway. Thanks

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Episode 65: The Great Belly Off Aug 09, 2018

Alright, which one of you jokers said it was Episode 66, and was it the same joker that uploaded just 27 minutes of the episode? Just come forward, no questions asked. We're not even mad, haha. For even more (fully uploaded, correctly numbered) YKS content, head on over to www.patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. It's communism if you like that kind of stuff, and also it's capitalism if you're one of those guys. So you really can't lose.Music for YKS is provided by Lydia Burrell of Howell Dawdy fame, Drew Toothpaste (www.theworstthingsforsale.com), and the he thinks he's people Mark Brendle.

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Episode 64: The Rainbow Bridge Aug 03, 2018

On this week's ep, it's ALL about one thing: the subjects of the show. That's right, today we've got a new challenger to the incumbent Squeeze Louise, a new tooth scam going viral, a cardboard (???) trash can, and an update on Jesse's torn hibuscus. Plus, Mike finally reveals his troll score! And lemme tell ya, it's a big one. Music for YKS is courtesy of: Twitter's @LydiaBurrell, Drew Toothpaste (www.toothpastefordinner.com), and the ready-in-minutes Mark BrendleCheck out the Patreon page too, if you want, and they probably won't even screw up the payments this time. Thank you www.patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks

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Episode 63: All That And A Bag Of Chips Jul 18, 2018

What What Happens Live is delightful! Inspired by Andy Cohen's experiences in the green room as a producer at CBS, and with a set inspired by his own home den, this show is unlike any other late night talk show. WWHL is fun, spontaneous, and engaging. The eclectic pairings ensure that you see guests in a brand new light. For example, one episode pairs John Mayer with Dan Rather. You would expect these guys to be like oil and water, but the show was the most endearing appearance I've seen from either guest, and the unexpected chemistry was thoroughly entertaining. Watching new guests Plead the Fifth, a game where they are asked three difficult questions and can abstain from answering only one, never gets old. Seeing Scott Baio reluctantly participate in a game called "Andy Loves Crotchy" (and then enjoying the ensuing twitter fallout with Baio's angry wife after the photo of a formal girlfriend was included) is pure gold. Some guests, like Baio, do not embrace the vibe of the show and these episodes are fun in an "I cannot look away from this tension" way. When you have guests embracing the show, like when Jenny McCarthy let Donnie Wahlberg draw a mustache on her face in permanent marker, it's a real riot. Expect the unexpected. A previous reviewer, sylviastel@aol.com, referred to Andy as a misogynist, and this label could not be further from the truth. Bravo has been built on the Real Housewives franchises (grabbing the baton from the Queer Eye success, running with it, and never stopping for a breath). If you are familiar with the Real Housewives, you know these shows to be real life soap operas. The divas allegedly exploited by Andy Cohen love the spotlight and use it as a platform to further their own personal endeavors. Andy asks proactive questions at reunion shows and on the set of WWHL, never to hMusic for this episode of YKS is courtesy of @LydiaBurrell (https://howelldawdy.bandcamp.com/), Drew toothpaste (www.theworstthingsforsale.com), and the rascally Mark Brendle.For more episodes of YKS, check out the Patreon page at www.patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks

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Episode 62: Belly Blankets Jul 11, 2018

This week on YKS....Mike's Big Deli Story, the inauspicious return of the Dookie List, and a surprise phone call from a stupid little idiot. "Bam!" - Emeril Music for this episode of YKS is courtesy of: Lydia Burrell (https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCGDqIKuaHxzw6FIbE3q4L5w), Drew Toothpaste (www.theworstthingsforsale.com), and the cowardly Mark BrendleAnd for more battery capers, check out patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. C'mon! Do It! please

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Episode 61: Wife Fraud Jul 04, 2018

I don't care what you call it, just put it up. Just say...ok, we go on break. Like Bernie Mac. And then say Bernie Mac Sanders because you do that impression. Then just do a list, like say: nudie suits, save a horse ride a cowboy, and sex accessories. But say "the guys talk about, etc." before every one so it doesn't look like a grocery list. After that you can say that we do the song of the summer competition, but play it up like it's really fun and they'll get that it's a bit. And say we do a roast battle, too. That should be enough. Oh and plug the music and the patreon. That's it basically. Yeah the whole bathroom is flooded. I gotta go.For more theoretical tops, check out patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks (new ep this week)Music for this episode of YKS is courtesy of: Twitter's @LydiaBurrell (https://www.youtube.com/channel/UCGDqIKuaHxzw6FIbE3q4L5w)Drew Toothpaste (www.theworstthingsforsale.com)and the treacherous Mark Brendle.

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Episode 60: Seth Rogenbot Jun 21, 2018

Hmm hmm hmm. Time to post the show, la dee da. Oh hello there. I didn't see you come in. Would you like to listen to Episode 60 of Your Kickstarter Sucks with me? Wonderful. It is about bug scams.For more information on Jonah Hill's exact age, check out patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. The ham there is always kept at the appropriate temperature.Music for YKS is courtesy of:Twitter's @lydiaburrell (https://howelldawdy.bandcamp.com/)Drew toothpaste (theworstthingsforsale.com)and the unbelievable Mark Brendle.

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Episode 59: Mike Didn't Tip Jun 13, 2018

We got him, boys. We finally got The Tipping Coward. On this week's episode, DB and JF play with some passive SCOTUS figurines, pontificate on the goodness of organized society, and finally reveal what's in the damn bowl. Plus, Kombucha chat! To submit a tip on the whereabouts of the Lindbergh Baby, head on over to patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks and click the "sign up" button.Music for this episode of YKS is courtesy of Twitter's @LydiaBurrell (https://howelldawdy.bandcamp.com/), Drew toothpaste (www.theworstthingsforsale.com), and the scurrilous Mark Brendle.

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Episode 58: Pasta Points Jun 08, 2018

In this, the ACTUAL 58th episode of YKS, Mike and JF are talkin' The Return of Heep, Bible Wars, and the perks of watchin' TV with your buddy's wife. Plus, the debut of the next hot Netflix show: Office TV. For more reviews of your favorite college posters, check out patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. Our latest episode, featuring historian and author Homer J. Simpson, has been widely praised by podcast fans and academics alike.Music for this episode of YKS is courtesy of:Twitter's @lydiaburrell (howelldawdy.bandcamp.com)Drew Toothpaste (theworstthingsforsale.com)and the erstwhile Mark Brendle

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Episode 57: Keeping Up With The Johnsons May 25, 2018

Ohhhh baby! It's a new episode and a new theme song baby! @LydiaBurrell hopped back in the studio to give the boys a funky-phresh new sound that you're gonna have to hear to believe. Plus, we get a little taste of Optimus Mike, who shows up to help us do diaper math and the Ted Cruz Face Scrunch. THEN....a crucial update on what everyone was doing at the specific time we asked them to write us an email (mostly driving, which, not great). For more of our favorite freshwater boys, check out www.patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. And I'll just tell you right now, we don't know a lot about fish.Music for this episode of YKS is courtesy @LydiaBurrell on Twitter, Drew Toothpaste (www.theworstthingsforsale.com), and the majestic Mark Brendle.

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Episode 56: Tofurkey Numbers May 11, 2018

Jesse and Mike are once again back in the studio, wearing headphones, opening cans into the microphones, sitting down, and all the classic things they're known for on today's episode of YKS. Don't look at my wife! For even more two smart guys content, check out patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. Music for this episode of YKS is provided by:Twitter's @LydiaBurrellDrew Toothpaste (www.theworstthingsforsale.com)and the superlative Mark Brendle.

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Episode 55: The Land Of Milk And Honey May 05, 2018

Wait just a minute....WHO'S F*&%^##%(ing Matt Damon here? It's YKS! And it's time to talk about Cat Poison. Mike and JF hit the scams of the week with their trusty sidekick Terrible Christopher, and stop along the way to discuss the shame of having a one-sock-son, the sharp rise in door stop costs, and the delicate precipice of balls quality.To make a donation in honor of listener Emma Leckey, go to https://beechwood.permavita.com/site/EmmaLisaAntunesLeckey.html?s=80 and read about the causes her family has chosen to support. And for more on what French guys are lacking, check out patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. Many, some would say too many, bonus hours of content await you.Music for this episode of YKS is courtesy of: Twitter's LydiaBurrell, Drew Toothpaste (theworstthingsforsale.com), and the muscular Mark Brendle.

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Episode 54: Mike's Small Business Apr 27, 2018

It's time to talk about Kanye West. Just kidding. Or, I don't know, maybe. Do it on your own time. This is about other stuff. For example: remembering the "Internet as a series of tubes" guy, who is now dead, why our sons hate making deals, 5th Dimensional Shifts, and VUDU Gift Cards. Plus, the complete guide to growing taters in space, and a couple letters for good measure.For more thoughts on which characters in movies should ultimately be named Tom Cruise, head on over to The Flat Earth Network at www.patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. Especially if you're a big fan of Vancouver-based stand-up comedians.Music for this episode of YKS is provided by:Twitter's @lydiaburrellDrew Toothpaste (www.theworstthingsforsale.com)and the one and only Mark Brendle.

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Episode 53: A Dispatch From Trout Lodge Apr 17, 2018

Best friends gather round the communal iPod, it's time once again for Your Kickstarter Sucks! On today's blister-packed episode, the boys are talkin' MySpace's enormous data hoard, YKSchella, a review of Marvelous (Infinite) War, baby necks, Syria's billboards, and stabbing a....panda????!!!????? Unbelievable! Plus, Mike debuts his highly anticipated Bernie Sanders impression and we read your letters.For more ass crimes, check out Patreon.com/YourKickstarterSucks. There's more episodes on there. It's a finite amount of them, but I don't think that makes them bad necessarily. Music for this episode of YKS is provided courtesy of:Drew Toothpaste of www.theworstthingsforsale.comTwitter's @lydiaburrelland Maniac Mark Brendle

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Episode 52: A Splice Of Life Apr 04, 2018

52 episodes...52 cards in a deck, not including the jokers. But lucky for you, this show DOES count the jokers. And there's two of 'em (they're the hosts). On this instant classic episode of YKS, Mike and Jesse riff on the saddest part of loved ones dying, sleeping in the trash, bodies falling apart, bulletproof backpack scumbags and covering cat assholes. Plus, Mike reveals his secret Juggalo past, and the boys debut a new segment: The Kitty Kat Two Pack.For more idea on what to take with you into the teleportation machine from The Fly, check out www.patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. There's some stuff on there, and it is nice.Music for this episode of YKS is courtesy of: Twitter's @LydiaBurrell, Drew Toothpaste of www.theworstthingsforsale.com, and the highly functional Mark Brendle.

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Episode 51: Hum From A Rose Mar 28, 2018

It's Episode 51 of Your Kickstarter Sucks! Featuring: Jesse's triumphant return, Mike's new age, the 24 hour poem and reasons you don't improvise a campaign video, Time Swapping, the calm, calm west, and that one Justin Timberlake flick, do you remember it?For more blankets for old people, head on over to www.patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks and sign up for YKS Premium. YKS Premium -- "Not bad"!Music for YKS is courtesy of Twitter's @LydiaBurrell, Drew Toothpaste of www.theworstthingsforsale.com, and the powerful Mark Brendle.

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Episode 50: Jesse's Last Episode Mar 18, 2018

A celebratory and transformative episode of YKS. For more jokes that don't pay off in the episode, check out www.patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. We're still doing that, even though the title of this episode makes it seem like we aren't.Music for this episode of YKS is courtesy Twitter's @LydiaBurrell, Drew Toothpaste of www.TheWorstThingsForSale.com, and the remarkable Mark Brendle.

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Episode 49: Breakfast Aboard The Nostromo Mar 09, 2018

Drive time podcast heads, YKS is comin' at ya full blast with both barrels blazin! This week we've got a terrific haggis recipe, a recap of the Indiana Jones geography, intense Chuck "Lore", and more beard opinions than I frankly cared to hear. For more on casual uncle relationships and to be entered into a chance to win prizes in The YKS Gadget Hole, check out www.patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. Lots of bonus stuff on there, and it's pretty good. Not as good as Martin, but still good.Music for YKS is courtesy of: Twitter's @LydiaBurrell, Drew Toothpaste (www.theworstthingsforsale.com), and the incorrigible Mark Brendle.

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Episode 48: Gun Recess Mar 01, 2018

Episode 48. Just two more til we're done! On this week's show, Mike "Mikeman" Hale and Jesse Farrar aka "Two Kicks" are talking lookbook explainers, coffee time trials, phone phreakers, and whether there are any stores in Italy? Plus, a listener has a bone to pick with us over something other than our inflammatory comments on social media. Sorry about those, by the way.For more types of cup, check out patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks, where a bunch of bonus episodes are just sitting around with their thumb up their ass. And if you'd like a shirt, they're at shop.yourkickstartersucks.com. They're pretty good shirts, also. Music for this episode of YKS is courtesy of: @LydiaBurrell on Twitter, Drew Toothpaste (www.theworstthingsforsale.com) and the muscular Mark Brendle.

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Episode 47: The Thinking Egg Feb 22, 2018

On this week's episode, delayed out of respect for the Presidents or whatever, the boys are talkin' skinhead lawyers, U2 Cables, living for eternity, gravitrons, My Shittiest Halloween......and twins!!! Plus, Mike takes on Nigeria and we read your letters. For more on how to send yourself into the future using various capsules, check out www.patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. It's basically your guide to becoming immortal.Music for this episode of YKS is courtesy: @LydiaBurrell, Drew Toothpaste (www.theworstthingsforsale.com) and the Illustrious Mark Brendle.

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Episode 46: The President's Bunghole Feb 16, 2018

You already know who it is!!!!!! Mike and Jesse are yammerin and stammerin all about who won the Big Gadget Hole Prize (it's Greg), why the homeless hate tech, whether or not brains have electricity, and so much more, but not too much more in a way that's annoying. Plus, we've got Mike's Big Game wrap-up and several angry voicemails from conservatives. Please enjoy the show. And if not, remember, this is the free one, so it's not even really supposed to be that good.Music for this episode of YKS is courtesy of @LydiaBurrell, Drew Toothpaste (www.theworstthingsforsale.com) and the one and only Mark Brendle. Special Thanks to Lyndon B Johnson and George Brett (RIP if they're dead)

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Episode 45: Cookin' Up Trouble Jan 30, 2018

It's Episode 45 and the hitmakers are back, baby! Oh you thought we were talking about your man's podcast? Foh! Foh. On this week's nearly-two-hour episode, the boys are talkin' whether chefs and panhandlers should switch titles, the worst way to watch a movie, and whether or not a Mike poops in the woods. For more intimate (and sortable!) shower data, check out www.patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. For links to the kickstarters featured in today's episode, head on over to yourkickstartersucks.comMusic for this episode is courtesy of Twitter's Lydia Burrell, Drew Toothpaste (www.theworstthingsforsale.com), and the fabulous Mark Brendle. This episode is sponsored by Da Share Z0ne's very first board game, The Devil's Level. Support the game at http://kck.st/2BigRF7

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Episode 44: You've Got Hale Jan 18, 2018

Alright gang. It's Season 3. It's time to make a good episode. So what do we got for ya? Well, here's the deal. It snowed here, so we couldn't do a very good one. Sorry. In lieu of that, though, we've got the first ever Gadget Hole Poll Winner, two new bits, a Dental Town check-in, and Mike's first Chip Rant. You wanna hear more from the Dad Bellies and the Price Genius? Head on over to www.patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks and punch in your credit card number. For about 5 stinkin bucks, you're gonna get practically infinite hours of exclusive entertainment from your favorite guys online. It's worth the cash and it helps to keep us online and doing this. So think about it. Or think about some other stuff. It's really your call.Music for today's YKS is courtesy of: Twitter's @LydiaBurrellDrew Toothpaste (www.theworstthingsforsale.com)and the unmistakable Mark Brendle

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Episode 43: Don't Touch My Gems! Jan 10, 2018

Well if it isn't a brand-new season of YKS! Get your binge-listening done now folks, because you're not going to want to miss the event of the season. Which is this. Now, Season 3 is all about looking forward, but first we take a look back at what we left behind in 2017: dead water, Australia beefs, and the flying ladies of Star Wars. After that, it's all about Picasso sweatshirts, the rising costs of hose pipe, and all manner of sea scam. So smash that play button fam!For more Mike The Bully and Space Jeff hijinks, check out patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. Music for this episode of YKS is courtesy of @LydiaBurrell, Drew Toothpaste (www.theworstthingsforsale.com), and Mark "The Ultimate Warrior" Brendle.

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Episode 42: Merry Kickmas Fam Dec 24, 2017

Ho ho ho! Merry Kickmas to all, and to all a good....show?!?! Wowee gang, it looks like the original elf on the shelf himself has shown up to drop a little audio present down your head chimney, as Mike and Jesse cuddle up by the fireplace to celebrate Christmas the only way they know how...with a belly full of hot cocoa and bigtime laughs! This week, Mike receives a special Kickmas song, Jesse wishes for a new scale that doesn't lie, and our old friend Kris Kringle joins us from the North Pole to talk about his new business venture and which famous sportswriters are going to hell.For more reasons you gotta love peeing outdoors, check out www.patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. You'll be treated to enough bonus episodes to get you through yet another painful family holiday experience.Music for this episode of YKS is courtesy of:Drew Toothpaste (toothpastefordinner.com)@joeClarkChicagoand the classic Mark Brendle.

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Episode 41: Chewbacca's Big Haircut Dec 20, 2017

A long, long time ago, in a galaxy far, far away...two guys recorded this friggin podcast! Come on! Well, the YKS Studios may not be a rough and tumble watering hole on a desert planet at the edge of hyperspace, but this week Mike and Jesse take the willing listener on a tour beyond the stars to meet some fascinating letter creatures, catch up with various bogs, and study the enchanting Bruh Man. Plus, a listener quits his job. Now get your behind out of that wretched hive of scum and villainy and "shoot first" on over to your podcast app to check it out!For more tips on how to become Albert Einstein, check out Patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. Dozens of hours of exclusive bonus episodes await you from their carbonite prisons. Music for this week's YKS is courtesy of:Drew Toothpaste (theworstthingsforsale.com)The Hell Yeah Babies (thehellyeahbabies.com)And the fabulous Mark Brendle

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Episode 40: Brown Bottle Flu Dec 13, 2017

It's another banger, gang, as Jesse and Mike tackle whether or not Jesus was smart, the various benefits of sleeping with a breathing bean, and the optimal number of steps for using a cup. Plus, your letters and a very urgent voicemail. To contribute to the show, write on in at yourkickstartersucks@gmail.com or call the YKS Hotline at 802-359-PISS (it was the last number they had). For more coffee obelisks, check out www.patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. There are more episodes there for you to listen to. Finally, visit shop.yourkickstartersucks.com for all of your Mike & Jesse merchandise needs. Music for this episode of YKS is courtesy of Drew Toothpaste (www.theworstthingsforsale.com), The Hell Yeah Babies (www.thehellyeahbabies.com) and Mark Brendle.

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Episode 39: Clothes for Rats with Mike Pfeiffer Dec 06, 2017

Well gang, the boys are lookin' for a fight tonight and this time...they've got backup. That's right, on today's show Mike and Jesse are joined by Mike Pfeiffer to talk about standing in a circle around one small bean, The Hell Yeah Babies' new (Kickstarter-funded!) album, and play a thrilling new game called Queens of Rock. Don't like hearing three people talk? Would rather hear just two people talk? Okay! Mike and Jesse also get back into the classic tandem flow to talk Pastor Dreams, Magilla Gorilla on Krokodil, and dog trades. You're not gonna wanna miss this dadgum thing so slap that hell yeah button and pork on your ear buds gang.You can find The Hell Yeah Babies' new single "Grenadine Nosebleeds" everywhere you listen to music on December 8th. Check 'em out on Twitter: @hellyeahbabies.For more Mr. Softee Content, kindly subscribe to the YKS Patreon at www.patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. Our current offer includes bonus content in exchange for a modest fee. Finally, music for this episode of YKS is courtesy of Drew Toothpaste (www.theworstthingsforsale.com) and the singular Mark Brendle.

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Episode 38: Obsessive Christmas Disorder Nov 27, 2017

In the only version of Episode 38 to not be confined to the dustbin of history, Mike and Jesse reconnect on a post-Turkey Day extravaganza to riff on healthcare, a millennial Santa, and whether the podcast is being pirated by hackers across the globe. Plus, a role-reversed edition of Real or Fake, and your letters.For more of our favorite Lous, check out the Patreon page at www.patreon.com/yourkickstartersucksMusic for this episode of YKS is courtesy ofThe Hell Yeah Babies (www.thehellyeahbabies.com)Drew Toothpaste (www.theworstthingsforsale.com)and Mark BrendleSix pack: Closca - https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/closca-bottle/closca-bottle-app-drink-water-make-a-statementSuccess Dice - https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/1384336/success-diceMemes of Art - https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/483069905/memes-of-artArtificial Intelligence Party - https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/1597129265/artificial-intelligence-political-decision-makingSmart Pourer - https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/smartpourer/smartpourer-is-your-personal-smart-pouring-spoutLootopia - https://www.kickstarter.com/projects/1229200050/lootopia-the-subscription-box-revolution-is-here

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YKS Premium S2E12 PREVIEW Nov 21, 2017

Check this out...It's a damn holiday miracle. Today only, or only the other times when it seems like a good idea to do, we are putting up nearly a full hour of the wonderful YKS Premium episode we did with Drew Toothpaste last week. So, enjoy this Jokeblogger Top Ten deep dive, and sign up at patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks to hear the rest. Plus, we've got a full free episode coming later this week as well, so you have lots of things to do instead of talking to your relatives. Ok thanks. I have to go to the store now. ByeMusic for YKS Premium is courtesy of Twitter's @LydiaBurrell and the Fabulous Mark Brendle.

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Episode 37: Where the Piss Goes Nov 13, 2017

Well it's been a tough year for ice cream, and a tough couple of weeks with no new YKS. But Michael "Donald Trump" Hale is back from the Pac-NW to kickstart our hearts, and OH YEAH you know he's wearin' flannel. On this episode of the show, Spooky November creeps along, we Make Chili Great Again, and, of course, there's plenty of that classic portable toilet talk. For more on what looks like a fam, check out www.patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks (bonus episode with Drew Toothpaste coming this week)!Music for YKS is provided:The aforementioned Drew Toothpaste of theworstthingsforsale.com, The Hell Yeah Babies of www.thehellyeahbabies.com, and the fabulous Mark Brendle.

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Episode 36: Crimes Against Puns Oct 25, 2017

Operation Dumbo Drop is a 1995 American war comedy film directed by Simon Wincer that explores war, politics, and animal welfare. The storyline was conceived from a screenplay written by Gene Quintano and Jim Kouf based on a true story by United States Army Major Jim Morris. The film stars Danny Glover and Ray Liotta as Green Berets during the Vietnam War in 1968, who attempt to transport an elephant through jungle terrain to a local South Vietnamese village which in turn helps American forces monitor Viet Cong activity.For more purloined movie synopses, visit Patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks where you will find more hours of bonus content than you could possibly know what do with.YKS: The Music is provided by The Hell Yeah Babies, Drew Toothpaste, and Mark Brendle.

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Episode 35: Ghost House Oct 20, 2017

On this very "ghould" episode of YKS, the boys are joined by a very "sweet" guest who has a touch of stage fright. So "boo" kind! Later, you'll hear some spooky and TRUE tales, as well as an extensive review of expensive trash cans. This week's episode is brought to you by Dumpster Juice Coffee. "It sucks!"For more YKS jump scares, check out www.patreon.com/yourkickstartersucksMusic for YKS is provided by:The Hell Yeah BabiesDrew Toothpasteand Mark Brendle

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Episode 34: Let's Get Real Oct 13, 2017

Sheldon Cooper, a 9-year-old boy, begins his first day of high school in the ninth grade with his older brother, George Cooper Jr. Having shown more skills than a typical child his age, he skipped several grades. On his first day, he questions his teachers and informs students of their rule-breaking. He tries to find his place in the new school and George must deal with having a much younger sibling in his class.For more YKS, check out our bonus episodes on Patreon: www.patreon.com/yourkickstartersucksMusic for YKS is courtesy of:The Hell Yeah Babies - www.thehellyeahbabies.comDrew Toothpaste - www.theworstthingsforsale.comand Mark Brendle

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Episode 33: Hacking Your Mom Oct 03, 2017

Well folks, October is finally here, and Autumn is in the air! Will that mean sweet treats and good eats for your favorite prickly pair of crowdfunding curmudgeons??? Tune in to this week's YKS to find out!For more Gallagher rants, check out www.patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. Music for this episode of YKS is courtesy of: The Hell Yeah Babies www.thehellyeahbabies.comDrew Toothpaste www.theworstthingsforsale.comand The Fabulous Mark Brendle.

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Episode 32: Google Earth Fuck Sep 23, 2017

While perusing the local car lot, Jesse discovers that his deceased friend Michael has been reincarnated as a junky old automobile, so he buys him and brings him home, much to the dismay of both his wife and eccentric car collector Captain Manzini who is determined to acquire the valuable automobile by hook or crook.

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Episode 31: Pumpkin Spice Smart Pillows Sep 15, 2017

Bust out the meatballs and call the wife over, it's time once again for YKS. On this week's show, Episode Unknown, the boys are talking NastyCon 2017 results, whether piss and shit are friends, the top magnets of all time, and oh yeah...Starbucks Freakin coffee. Plus: is Austin the Portland of the South or the Brooklyn of the West?Music for today's YKS is courtesy of:The Hell Yeah Babies (www.hellyeahbabies.com)Drew Toothpaste (www.theworstthingsforsale.com)listener Christian Lopetzand Mark Brendle

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Episode 30: The Thirtieth Episode Spectacular Sep 07, 2017

Knock Knock...who's at the door? Is it the Kirby Vacuum salesman?Why no! It's the YKS boys and they're here to celebrate 30 wonderful episodes. Coming up on today's show, we've got information that will lead to Hillary Clinton's arrest, a checklist of things to do with your dentist, and, for the full hour, none other than Mr. Craig Leaf! For more jars of moonshine taken to the dome, check out www.Patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks, the exclusive home of hours and hours of YKS bonus material. Music for YKS is courtesy of: Drew Toothpaste (www.theworstthingsforsale.com)The Hell Yeah Babies (www.thehellyeahbabies.com)and Mark Brendle

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Episode 29: Frankenstein's Sex Shop Sep 01, 2017

Just when you thought it was safe, the bad boys of podcasting are hitting your veins with an 8ball of laughs. Join Mike and Jesse as they tackle topics like sex, religion, UFOs and..parking tickets!? Take one look at this messed up world through their eyes and you’ll never be the same again!Segments: Intro, Cumming Diarrhea, “The Dentist Story”, Farting the ABCs, Shitty Horse and more.Bonus: Mike uses a hitachi magic wand on Jesse for 20 minutes (loud)Music for YKS is provided by: The Hell Yeah Babies -- www.thehellyeahbabies.com Drew Toothpaste -- www.theworstthingsforsale.comand Mark Brendle

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Episode 28: A Sandwich-Shaped Notebook Aug 22, 2017

Where are all the white women at?! Well, we don't know, but they sure aren't on this podcast! It's a real boys club on YKS this week, and your humble mumblers in chief are here to very heterosexually discuss the racist statue factory, the infamous Two Darrens Problem, and the mysterious fate of a long lost YKS segment. For more Bubba the Love Sponge theories and impressions of Burning Sandies, check out the Patreon page at www.patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks, where hours and hours of "Let's get back on track here, JF" await!

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Episode 27: Skiing in Jeans / Lizard Spit Aug 15, 2017

The boys are back and on this week's episode, they're taking a bite out of the perils of achieving self-love, violating the Earth's TOS, what my dude looks like a freakin cross between, and much, much more. For EVEN more on Ben-Wa Balls and the problems with Disney's Frozen, check out the official YKS Patreon page at www.patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks, where dozens of hours of bonus content awaits!Music for YKS is provided by: - Drew of TheWorstThingsForSale.com- The Hell Yeah Babies www.thehellyeahbabies.com- Mark Friggin' Brendle

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Episode 26: Please Remember To Breathe Aug 08, 2017

Awwww hell yeah! The boys are about to do it! Remember that, from a while ago? Well, Jesse and Mike do, and they also remember that scene from The Matrix where Neo bends the spoon. Of course, that's what this week's episode is REALLY about, but in addition, the guys talk about making shit happen in 2018, sexualizing phone use in the classroom, and watermelon statistics. It's YourKickstarterSucks for yet another week! My god, it's heaven on Earth!For more joke analysis and dog food taste tests, head on over to www.patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks, where in exchange for a nominal donation, you will receive access to an expansive backlog of quality YKS content!Music for YKS is provided by:  Our Friend Mark Brendle Drew Toothpaste (www.TheWorstThingsForSale.com The Hell Yeah Babies (www.TheHellYeahBabies.com) Thanks, gang.

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Episode 25: Wheel of Savings Jul 27, 2017

The 'boys are NOT messing around this week...just kidding! They are! Mike and Jesse are talking everything from the big healthcare bill to Mike's Great Kool-Aid Story, and you absolutely GOTTA download this bad boy to get all the goods! Check it out!!!!For more cheer and good fun, head on over to www.patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks for bonus eps and much (less) more!Music for YKS is provided by: - Our Friend Mark Brendle- Drew Toothpaste (www.TheWorstThingsForSale.com- The Hell Yeah Babies (www.TheHellYeahBabies.com)and Dave Shaw. Thanks gang!

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Episode 24: Justice Beads, Scary Snowmen and Hot Babies Jul 19, 2017

TK TK TK Jesse Don't Forget To Write a Description For This Episode Before We Upload it. Again, Don't Upload This Episode Until We Think of a Decent Description for the Description Box on iTunes. Thanks, Mike TK TK TK TKP.S. What Are You Doing This Weekend. Do You Want To Hang Out Friday Night or Saturday Night. Write Back MikeMusic: The Hell Yeah Babies, Drew Toothpaste and Feathermeal

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Episode 23: What's In The Hatch? Jul 12, 2017

Well well well, if it isn't a brand new theme song! Big thanks to The Hell Yeah Babies for putting this together. Check 'em out at www.thehellyeahbabies.com. ALSO: we've got ghoulies, gamers, and brushing your teeth in the sexiest manner possible, plus your letters, PLUS just absolutely getting depressed and feeling awful all of the time! It's a brand new YKS right here on the YKS Podcast Network.For more rebranded shit from TaoBao, check out our bonus episodes over at patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. And of course, www.yourkickstartersucks.com is also a place on the internet you can go to. Sorry. A place to which you can go.

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Episode 22: America, LLC Jul 04, 2017

Do you remember that movie, Team America? The puppet thing. Alright, well, this episode is not really about that. It's about being a patriot, and loving your country, and surviving a nuclear war, and fidget spinner condoms, and McDonald's, and going hogwild on some damn nuggets. For MORE going hogwild on some damn nuggets, check out patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks and help us build our fallout shelter in the backyard.

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Episode 21: Tooth Values Jun 27, 2017

It's beef-startin' time! Season 2 chugs along as the boys take aim at all the sacred cows: ride sharing apps, pyramid schemes, and a certain political comedy podcast with, shall we say, lots of people on it. Now that's what we call a family feud! For more on what doctors do with the body parts they have to cut off of sick people, check out patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks!

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Episode 20: Daniel Day-Lewis Acting School Jun 24, 2017

The run of incredible, exclusive interviews continue as the inimitable Daniel Day-Lewis stops by for a fireside chat with the David Frost of YKS, Jesse Farrar. (Frequent Co-Host Mike makes an appearance sometime later in the program.) What does Day-Lewis want to say to his millions of adoring fans? What's next for the famously reclusive generational talent? Did anyone get a fidget spinner stuck up their ass? For all that and more, listen and subscribe to Your Kickstarter Sucks: The Podcast!And for even MORE, you're gonna want to go over to patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks for the absolute top-tier shit that you can't get anywhere else. Like, primo shit. It rocks.

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Episode 19: Neil deGrasse Tyson Thinks Spider-Man Is Real Jun 16, 2017

In the thrilling Season 2 premiere of Your Kickstarter Sucks, the boys are Talkin' Tyson on all things Neil deGrasse, considering harassing celebrities over Bluetooth, and discovering the absolute worst that Etsy has to offer all our wonderful fathers on their big day. Worth the wait? Well oh hell yes it was!

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Episode 18: Mikey the Foot Jun 07, 2017

LIVE from the fabulous YKS Studio II (Mike's closet) comes a wet and wild edition of the podcast we all know and love. This week we've got Garry Anderson in the studio for a take on Bill Maher's Big Whoopsie, an extremely confusing water bottle, and a sneak peek at 2018's biggest blockbuster.For more goof-offs like this, check out our special Bonus episodes at patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks and incredible text-based content at www.yourkickstartersucks.com. Happy suckin!

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Episode 17: Dead Ape Watch May 30, 2017

On this week's episode, the boys recall a time in which jokes were about something other than a gorilla dying, uncover a scandal that will tear apart the webcomic community, and offer to take an African gentleman to church. Plus, these two hockeyheads get into some Puck Talk in advance of the hometown Nashville Predators competing for the best trophy in all of sports: The Hockeyman Puck!For more YKS fun, check out bonus episodes available to subscribers at patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks. Or just read our website if you want to. It's www.yourkickstartersucks.com.

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Episode 16: Firing The Pope May 24, 2017

Well, it's a day late but not quite a dollar short, because this special JUMBO edition of the Your Kickstarter Sucks podcast is a hootin' and hollerin' two hours worth of knee-slappin late stage capitalist content. Today, the boys are all in on the death of fidget spinners, the PERFECT (subscription-based) NOTEBOOK, and even more dumb crap no one needs. Plus, your letters and the triumphant return of the JokeBlogger Top Ten!For more great YKS content, check us out on Patreon: patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks and rate/review us on iTunes!

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Episode 15: Gamer's Delight May 17, 2017

The boys come to the table, hat in hand, to apologize...that you were OFFENDED! Just kidding. It's a big dose of reality this week for blanket lovers, gamers, and veterans of foreign wars. Plus, a rousing edition of Real or Fake!Slam it on over to https://www.patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks for weekly bonus episodes!

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Episode 14: Dead in Alaska May 10, 2017

The boys finally stumble upon the mythological Smart Toaster, induct a new member into the Kickstarters That Don't Suck Club, and dive into politics with an academic discussion of the freaking Cheeto in Chief! Plus, your letters.

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Episode 13: This Is Not A Joke May 01, 2017

Hey guys! This week, the boys get excited about the return of Jeff Goldblum, learn about the economy, and debut The Dookie List on the free show. Go to Patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks to support the show and get bonus episodes!

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FREE Preview from Bonus Episode 12 with Bigfoot and Garry Anderson Apr 28, 2017

As promised, the highly controversial comedy showdown in the final round of the YKS Last Comic Standing tournament is now free for all the fans!!!!!!!! Could it get any better than that, honestly? Yes! At patreon.com/yourkickstartersucks we've got this kind of good ass shit posted, many times over, and more coming every week! If that seems insane to you, imagine how crazy it feels to me, the guy who has to record it! Well, enjoy!!

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Episode 12: Too Much Lotion Apr 25, 2017

The boys talk RPGs, the lack of funny Australians, and getting stuck in that darn bathroom again!

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Episode 11: Taco Shame Apr 18, 2017

The boys dive in to springtime with a HUGE Patreon announcement and the tip-toppiest cleaning projects on Kickstarter. I don't remember recording this one. I hope it is good. Oh, the blog is coming back, so check it out: www.yourkickstartersucks.com

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Episode 10: The Stewart Rodcast Apr 11, 2017

The boys take a trip down memory lane to relive the show's best moments so far. If this laugh-a-minute clip show doesn't have you digging through the archives again, nothing will! Sponsored by Rent-A-Ass.

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Episode 9: Huge Clouds Apr 04, 2017

It's cloud-blowin' time, as the boys develop a revolutionary new system to absorb nutrients many times faster than through ingestion. Also: how to get crazier, bigger muscles and effectively prank your friends.

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Episode 8: Fishy Flip Mar 28, 2017

The boys get real intimate in the bedroom and the bathroom before a rollicking edition of Real or Fake?! Plus, your letters and an announcement on our first big YKS contest. With Special Guest Matt Damon.

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Episode 7: The Hatbox Baby Mar 21, 2017

Leonardo DiCaprio and Oscar-nominee Kate Winslet light up the screen as Jack and Rose, the young lovers who find one another on the maiden voyage of the "unsinkable" R.M.S. Titanic. But when the doomed luxury liner collides with an iceberg in the frigid North Atlantic their passionate love affair becomes a thrilling race for survival. From acclaimed filmmaker James Cameron comes a tale of forbidden love and courage in the face of disaster that triumphs as a true cinematic masterpiece.

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Episode 6: Now The Tugging Begins Mar 14, 2017

Loud enough for ya?! The boys experiment with a new hosting arrangement, talk sleek coin experiences, and welcome a huge, huge guest.

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Episode 5: The Fidgipen is Mightier Than the FondleCube Mar 07, 2017

The Boys take a long look inward and contemplate the tautology of the self. Also covered on today's show: the ethics of death, atomic consciousness, and molecular theory. Just kidding, this one is about bad jokes and stupid pens.

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Episode 4: The Oscars Special Mar 01, 2017

The boys put on their critic hats to talk Oscar predictions and movie Kickstarters. Later, up and coming musician Ted "Tom" Leo calls in to talk about crowdfunding his as-yet-untitled new album. Plus, the debut of "Real or Fake?"

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Episode 3: The Media is in The News Feb 21, 2017

Mike and Jesse continue the YKS Apology tour, catch up on the news, and unveil some exciting announcements about the show!

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Episode 2: Kramer Culpa Feb 10, 2017

Mike and Jesse are back in the saddle, and this time they're for real. Up on deck this week: the tasteful nihilism of the infamous Michael Richards' apology, the importance of a million dollar towel, and a spirited round of "Yes, Sandler".Twitter: @yourkickstarteremail: yourkickstartersucks@gmail.comWith music by Big Al Beatz and the one and only Mark Brendle.

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Episode 1: Your Pilot Sucks Feb 01, 2017

Your Kickstarter Sucks: The Podcast: The Debut! Mike and Jesse talk Lifesavers, M&Ms, and the LA Riots in this long-awaited episode. The audio may be screwed up, but so are the Kickstarters in this, the next evolution of the YKS brand. Follow YKS on Twitter: @YourKickstarter or not who cares.with music by BigAlBeatz, DPSchools, and, of course, Mark Brendle

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