Life on Side B

Latest Episodes:

S1E13 | Laurence on Self-Sacrificial Living in Community Sep 09, 2019

Show notes

I have been excited to get Laurence on the podcast because he brings an amazing perspective on a wide range of topics from community to identity. More than anything our conversation impacted me with what he shared on the importance to look for how we can serve those we are in community with rather than how they can serve us. So often we go into community looking for how others can help us but Jesus calls us to another way of living.

You can contact Laurence at laurencekoo@gmail.com

Born and raised in the Netherlands, Laurence studied dentistry at the Vrije Universiteit in Amsterdam. After his graduation he worked part time on staff with a college ministry and part time as a dentist. After 6 years he left dentistry to focus on helping students and young professionals grow in their faith and become disciples of Jesus.

Laurence has served in different leadership position in collegiate ministry in the Netherlands for 14 years. After that he moved to Colorado Spring in the US to work for the same mission organization. He is responsible for the training and development for next generation US missionaries before and on the field. He is also an international speaker and consultant on the topics of sexuality and LGBTQ.

Music:

1. Theme Song - Driven to Success by Scott Holmes

2. 18:21 - Stomps and Claps by Scott Holmes

3. 43:15 - Teamwork by Scott Holmes

S1E12 | David on Costly Obedience, Part 2 Sep 02, 2019

Show notes

Today, David Gill and I are continuing our review of the book, Costly Obedience by Mark Yarhouse and Olya Zaporozhets. This conversation was divided into two parts. In part one, we went through chapters one and two. Today we are finishing the book.

David Gill is a graduate of Covenant Seminary (’15) and a life-long musician whose current hobbies include leading worship and scoring silent films from 1915-1929. He is the current music director for the Revoice conference, and he looks to build bridges in the arts and LGBT communities with the Church.

Books Mentioned:

Yarhouse, Mark, and Olya Zaporozhets. Costly Obedience: What We Can Learn from the Celibate Gay Christian Community. Grand Rapids, MI: Zondervan, 2019.

Music:

1. Theme Song - Driven to Success by Scott Holmes

2. Interlude #1 (15:15) - Hotshot! by Scott Holmes

3. Interlude #2 (36:38) - Shine Bright by Scott Holmes

S1E11 | David on Costly Obedience, Part 1 Aug 26, 2019

Show notes

Today, David Gill and I are reviewing the book, Costly Obedience by Mark Yarhouse and Olya Zaporozhets. The conversation was so good that it was hard to edit it down to one episode so this conversation is being separated into two parts.

Books Mentioned:

Yarhouse, Mark, and Olya Zaporozhets. Costly Obedience: What We Can Learn from the Celibate Gay Christian Community. Grand Rapids, MI: Zondervan, 2019.

Music:

1. Theme Song - Driven to Success by Scott Holmes

S1E10 | Luke on Church Inclusion Aug 12, 2019

Show notes

This week, Luke Calvin is joining me for the episode to discuss church inclusion. Recently, conservative churches have struggled to process the inclusion of celibate gay Christians. As Luke beautifully says in the episode, the church is meant to be a place where "others" can find they belong. So what does and should that look like for Side B Christians.

Luke is a Licensed Professional Counselor in the state of Missouri and is the co-director of New Hope Counseling Services. He is also a worship director, and a ruling elder in the Presbyterian Church in America. He lives in Wentzville, MO with his wife, Jen, and 2 boys Grey and Reese.

Music:

1. Theme Song - Driven to Success by Scott Holmes

2. Interim Music - (17:10) Come Ye Sinners by Murphy, D.X. and (35:56) Sun-Kissed by Scott Holmes

Books Mentioned:

(50:24) Mike Mason, The Mystery of Marriage: Meditations on the Miracle. Colorado, CO: Multnomah Books, 2005.

S1E8 | Pieter on Communal Celibacy Jul 29, 2019

Show notes

Today, I am talking with Pieter Valk about the monastic community he is creating in Nashville called the Nashville Family of Brothers, which aims to offer family to celibate men. We talk about celibacy, its place in the church, and the importance of community as a celibate individual.

Pieter is the Director of EQUIP, a Nashville-based team of missionary consultants who help churches become places where LGBT+ people can belong and thrive according to a traditional sexual ethic. He is also a clinical mental health counselor that serves LGBT+ students at a local Christian university. Pieter is motivated by the pain and beauty of his story and the stories of fellow gay Christians submitting their sexualities to the Lordship of Christ. Learn more about his story at equipyourcommunity.org.

The interim music comes from the song "Wonderous Love" by Murphy, D.X. Listen to them on Spotify, Apple Music or wherever you listen to your music. And as always, the theme song is by Scott Holmes.

S1E7 | Meredith on Mixed Orientation Marriage: A Queer POC Perspective Jul 22, 2019

Show notes

Today, we are returning to the topic of mixed orientation marriage for one last episode this season. I am talking with Meredith, a queer black woman married to a straight white man. She is a self-identified nerd who loves science, and she is here to share about her experience faith, sexuality, as well as race issues. You will want to listen to the whole episode cause we have a fun time at the end talking about celebrity crushes and giving some "Dear Straight People" letters. You can follow on twitter @QueerXtian and you can contact her through her email, queer.female.xtian@gmail.com

S1E6 | Lesli on Being Genderqueer Jul 08, 2019

Show notes

Today, I am joined by Seth Touchton as my cohost and we are talking with Lesli Hudson-Reynolds about their experience as a genderqueer person. We are discussing trans issues and what it looks like in Lesli's life to be Side B. Many people are nervous to approach trans issues and are unsure how to walk along side non-cisgender individuals in their life. We hope that you can approach this episode with listening ears and a humble posture.

Lesli is currently serving as Gender Identity Ministry Director for Lead Them Home. Lesli mentors youth & adults seeking God's will in their gender identity. They are also developing a resource designed to thoughtfully engage church leadership in the gender conversation. Prior to joining the LTH team, Lesli spent 15 years on the road and in regional theatre as Production Stage Manager for numerous Broadway musicals, ballets, and plays. They still escape to NY to see shows whenever possible. If you want to get in contact with Lesli, you can contact them at lesli@leadthemhome.org.

S1E5 | Lisa on Mixed Orientation Marriage: The Straight Perspective Jun 26, 2019

Show notes

This week, I am talking with Lisa, the wife of Dean Samuels who I interviewed in the last episode. She is sharing about her experience in mixed orientation marriage to a queer man. I love her honesty and realness like nothing else. You will totally wanna listen in to this.

If you want to check out the book I mentioned, it is called Redeeming Sex by Debra Hirsch. Also if you want to learn more about Dean and Lisa, you can learn more on Dean's authorship page on the Your Other Brothers blog at https://www.yourotherbrothers.com/author/dean/

Theme Music credit: "Driven to Success" by Scott Holmes

Side B Detour | Post Revoice Reflections Jun 24, 2019

Show notes

So we are trying something new called Side B Detours, where I and whoever I decide to join me just talk for 15 to 25 minutes on whatever topic or issue we want to not related to the season theme. For this first Detour, I invited Michelle Newbold back to share about her experience at Revoice since she shared about her anticipation for it in Episode 3. I also share about some things I have been reflecting on since Revoice like the question, "What keeps me Side B?"

You can follow Michelle on instagram @themichellenewbold or follow her at themichellenewbold.com. Also check out her blog post on Revoice called "Straight Girl, Gay Conference".

S1E4 | Dean on Mixed Orientation Marriage Jun 12, 2019

Show notes

Today, I am talking with Dean Samuels about his experience as a queer man married to a straight woman. In recent years, heterosexual marriages which involve one or more persons with non-straight sexual orientations have come to be referred to as "mixed-orientation marriages." Dean is here sharing his experience in heterosexual marriage as a man primarily attracted to men as well as sharing advice for others navigating mixed orientation marriages or interested in pursuing one.

Dean is a pastor at a church in the midwest, has been married for more than 5 years, is the father to a beautiful little girl, and is also a contributing author to the blog, Your Other Brothers. You can read his writings on the Your Other Brothers blog here.

Also, in case you are looking for a resource to help with mixed-orientation marriages, Dean did not mention it in the episode but he really recommends couples check out The Seven Principles for Making Marriage Work by John Gottman. While the book does not discuss mixed orientation marriages specifically, it holds a lot of great advice and principles that have helped Dean navigate his own marriage. You can buy it on Amazon here.

Theme Music credit: "Driven to Success" by Scott Holmes

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