What if deep, intimate, and meaningful friendships could change the world?
Dr. Niobe Way, an internationally renowned Professor of Developmental Psychology at NYU, believes this is the path toward a more humane future. As a leading expert on what she calls the “crisis of connection” affecting boys and men in the U.S. and beyond, Dr. Way draws from over 40 years of research on social and emotional development, exploring how cultural ideologies shape child development and family dynamics.
Her research centers around three key insights: (1) boys and men deeply crave meaningful, intimate friendships, (2) our culture stigmatizes male-to-male intimacy, labeling it as soft, feminine, or indicative of same-sex desire, and (3) this cultural failure has fueled a mental health crisis, leading to rising levels of depression, suicide, and mass violence among boys and men.
In her latest book, Rebels with a Cause: Reimagining Boys, Ourselves, and Our Culture, Dr. Way brings together four decades of research. In our conversation, we discuss her discoveries and how our culture has gendered basic human instincts, prioritizing academic achievement and romantic relationships over friendships. This imbalance has led to a crisis of connection, heightening loneliness, depression, and violence. Dr. Way insists that boys are telling us what they need—we just need to listen.
Her earlier book, Deep Secrets: Boys’ Friendships and the Crisis of Connection, inspired the Oscar-nominated film Close, which won the Grand Prix Award at Cannes. Dr. Way is also the founder of the Project for the Advancement of Our Common Humanity (PACH) and leads "The Listening Project," an initiative focused on fostering curiosity, connection, and empathy to combat loneliness and anxiety. She has served as President of the Society for Research on Adolescence, holds a doctorate from Harvard School of Education, and completed her postdoctoral fellowship at Yale.
This conversation is a must-listen! A thought-provoking discussion on the transformative power of friendships, the cultural barriers boys and men face in seeking them, and why nurturing deep, supportive friendships is essential to addressing many of today’s societal challenges.
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