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    Personal Journals

    The Story of Sandra Marie

    A son interviews his mother about her experiences growing up as a lesbian in the Mormon church, her nightmarish journey through the LDS Conversion therapy for homosexuals, and her escape from an abusive marriage. Sandra’s son also wrote, performed, and recorded the music for the series.

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    Latest Episodes:
    Episode One - Idaho Tomboy Jan 08, 2019
    Show notes

    On the first Episode Sandra recounts what she can remember from her early childhood. Growing up in the 50’s as a tomboy in Idaho, before knowing what it was to be a lesbian. Being bullied, fighting back, and discovering an escape through theater.

    Episode One - Idaho Tomboy H13 Radio Download

    Episode Two - Carhop and California Jan 08, 2019
    Show notes

    On the second Episode Sandra takes us from her childhood into her early adulthood. She explains how she became a convert into the Mormon religion and how she was ostracized because her parents drank coffee and her dad smoked cigarettes. She chronicles her first romances and we hear about her first kiss. And the fateful circumstances that would send her to Utah to undergo conversion therapy.

    Episode Two - Carhop & California H13 Radio Download

    Episode Three - The Anti Gay Saints Jan 08, 2019
    Show notes

    On Episode Three Sandra explains to her son how she was lured into the LDS church. Then we learn more about the long history of intolerance from the leaders of the Mormon church. And finally, she describes the nightmare that was her conversion therapy at Brigham Young University.

    Episode Three - The Anti Gay Saints H13 Radio Download

    Episode Four - Mr. Smiles Jan 08, 2019
    Show notes

    On Episode four Sandra’s son finds out how she met his father, “Mr. Smiles,” and what events led up to them getting married. We learn about the red flags she ignored and we hear the nightmarish details of his abuse beginning to unfold.

    Episode Four - Mr. Smiles H13 Radio Download

    Episode Five - A Man of God Jan 08, 2019
    Show notes

    On Episode Five Sandra has the shattering realization that she did not marry a Man of God. The abuse continues to escalate and she finds herself having another child with Mr. Smiles. Then Sandra and her son discuss what goes on inside the mind of an abused person.

    Episode Five - A Man of God H13 Radio Download

    Episode Six - Now Begins the War Jan 08, 2019
    Show notes

    The pressure cooker is about to blow. On Episode Six, Sandra and her son painfully recount the horrible events that led up to Sandra’s breaking point. When, completely shattered, she somehow finds strength from within to put an end to the marriage.

    Episode Six - Now Begins the War H13 Radio Download

    Episode Seven - The Ammunition Jan 08, 2019
    Show notes

    All hell breaks loose when Sandra divorces Neal. On the Seventh Episode, Sandra recounts the vicious tactics employed by Mr. Smiles. In a state where the legislation is intertwined with Mormonism and, at the time, very intolerant toward homosexuals, he uses this and his skills in accounting to ensure Sandra is left with nothing. Out of his mind, he forces her to face the most difficult decision she’ll ever make.

    Episode Seven - The Ammunition H13 Radio Download

    Episode Eight - Into Being Jan 08, 2019
    Show notes

    A thousand miles away from Mr. Smiles, Sandra can finally begin to heal. On Episode 8, she discusses her spiritual journey, being in a lesbian relationship, and building a new life in Los Angeles. It takes several years, but she finally heals, and finds peace and love.

    Episode Eight - Into Being H13 Radio Download

    Episode Nine - You're Valued, Be Who You Are Jan 08, 2019
    Show notes

    On the final Episode, Sandra’s son asks her what advice she might have for people caught in abusive relationships or LGBTQ people confined to conservative communities. Finally we thank all of our listeners and fellow podcasters and give shout outs to some of our favorite podcasts. Thanks so much for listening. Find us on twitter @storyofsandra. Email us directly at: sandra@h13radio.com

    Episode Nine - You're Valued, Be Who You Are H13 Radio Download

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