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    Education

    The Simple Sophisticate – Intelligent Living Paired with Signature Style

    The simple sophisticate is someone who prefers quality over quantity, sensible living over mindless consumption, personal style instead of trendy fashions, has an insatiable curiosity for life’s endless questions and a desire to live a truly fulfilling life rather than being led around by the nose. Inspired by her lifestyle blog The Simply Luxurious Life, Shannon Ables (the original Simple Sophisticate) shares with listeners tips on how to live a refined life on an everyday income, a life of true contentment. Founded on the principle of the art of living a life of quality over quantity, episodes explore topics ranging from creating an everyday life you love living, strengthening mindfulness practices, preparing seasonally delicious meals, building a capsule wardrobe, traveling the world (Francophiles and Anglophiles tune in as France as well as the Britain are favorite destinations), and living life to the fullest without breaking the bank because living well is really quite simple.

    *illustration by artist Sarah Löcker exclusively commissioned for the show

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    Copyright: © 2024

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    Latest Episodes:
    437: How to Become a More Secure Person — 6 Ways taught by Amir Levine in his new book Nov 04, 2026
    Show notes

    That feeling when our shoulders drop naturally, we make decisions from a place of confidence rather than fear, we are at ease to be ourselves and surround ourselves with those who feel safe to be themselves. There is an unspoken respectfulness rather than resentment, an enjoyment of the company and life we have cultivated, and when momentary chaos jets into the day, we remain steady, trusting we will make it through to the other side where calm will return.

    A secure feeling in our daily life can arrive or be reached in a few different ways. And mind you, we're not talking financial security, we're talking emotional attachment security. The feeling of being at ease with our own company as well as with those we connect with and interact with. To live a secure life as it pertains to attachments is to engage with the world from a place where our nervous system is regulated (i.e. relaxed) giving us the ability to confidently try new things, share our true selves, relax entirely, and savor completely.

    You may remember or have read Dr. Amir Levine's bestselling book that he co-authored titled Attached (see below). It inspired an entire episode of The Simple Sophisticate podcast (#318), and while that book focused primarily on romantic relationships, in his new book Secure: The revolutionary guide to creating a secure life (released this past spring), he spread the net wider addressing how to be secure in all types of relationships and how to navigate when we are not a healthy place to be secure. In this way, the book is the resource I was delighted to come across recently as it validated and further taught how to be secure within oneself and in choosing and nurturing relationships to maintain a secure life.

    One of the most helpful Ahas I had while reading this new book, Secure., is that we are often not consistently the same type of attachment style with every relationship (i.e. person) in our life. And this demonstrates that both people figure into the equation that effects the security or lack of security in the relationship. So for example, you may be a fairly secure person, but with say your boss, you become quite anxious. Upon further exploration into why that is, you discover that they are dismissive of your ideas consistently, which causes you to doubt your contributions. Or conversely, maybe you tend to be more avoidant, but with your romantic partner, you feel largely secure because they don't invade your space when you need it, they aren't constantly bugging you when you are apart during the day, and this gives you the independence you need without feeling you have to avoid them or their communication efforts.

    Ultimately, our objective is to build secure relationships throughout the web of our lives, and once we ourselves are secure and understand how to remain secure, this becomes easier to do.

    Now, let's discover how to become a secure person in our life, and build secure relationships.

    Tune in to the episode for the full content, and find the Show Notes on The Simply Luxurious Life blog - https://thesimplyluxuriouslife.com/podcast437


    No. 44 — Let Go of Reliance on These Two Things: Un Moment de Méditation Nov 01, 2026
    Show notes

    Find the text for this mini-episode on The Simply Luxurious Life - https://thesimplyluxuriouslife.com/moment44


    No. 43 — Self-Service for Decision-Making Quandaries: Un Moment de Méditation Oct 25, 2026
    Show notes

    Find the text for this mini-episode on The Simply Luxurious Life - https://thesimplyluxuriouslife.com/moment43


    436: A Sophisticated Sanctuary — How to Decorate Our Home to Reflect Our Private Self Oct 21, 2026
    Show notes

    "Sophistication is a perfect marriage between intelligence and simplicity, combined with supreme confidence." —Rose Tarlow, interior designer, author of The Private House

    A home that spontaneously prompts a deep exhale of relief and appreciation when we arrive. Four walls of our own that reflect what we need to unwind, put down any defenses or professional selves that we have needed to do our job. When we know we have such a place, no matter the size, but we know it is our own, our whole being can rest, can delight and can be free.

    The caveat is that a home such as this doesn't just magically come together. In fact, even hiring an interior designer won't create this feeling of deep intimate calm that day after day, year after year, we feel innately. Rather, it takes intention, both in knowing ourselves and in knowing how to create the aesthetic combinations of colors, textiles, décor items, furniture and arrangement. The latter is what internationally respected interior designer, antiquarian and fine furniture and fabric creator Rose Tarlow can teach us. In her book The Private House published first back in 2001, she details, more accurately, journals her way through her thought process of decorating private homes for her clients, and herself and loved ones. The book was republished with updates in 2024, and I was fortunate to receive a copy after being inspired to explore the title by a long-time reader and member of TSLL community Deborah L. (thank you Deb!).

    Rose Tarlow knows quiet luxury, even though she herself would never use the term. But to look at her projects of homes located in France (Provence), England (London) and in the States (Los Angeles), the fact that more than 20 years later they still look inviting, reveal her skill of timeless acquisitions, textile choices and arrangements.

    Have a look at the quote below and her thoughts about the importance of creating, decorating a house so that it becomes our private house.

    "Our private house should be a reflection of oursleves, our way of being in the world, what makes us distinctly different from one another. Taste is a matter of opinion and its nature is constantly seeking to define itself. So we are continually influenced by the people we meet, by what we read, and by what we see. Our opinions take shape, yet we are never fully formed, always becoming, incorporating experiences, continuously changing and refining our image of ourselves throughout our lives. This never-ending process of evolvement makes designing one's own home an extremely personal experience." —Rose Tarlow, interior designer, author of The Private House

    Along with knowing how to decorate, as mentioned above, we must also bring our self-knowledge, and this is an intentional journey we must embark upon, and a most enjoyable and worthwhile one as well. No only for decorating our home well, but making life and relationship decisions. TSLL blog, books and podcast have been dedicated to sharing with you resources and inspiration for unearthing and gaining the knowledge and skills you need to take this journey and with today's post/episode, it's all about decorating know-how: what works and why, how to decide and how to approach decorating your home when you have more than one room staring back at you waiting to be customized.

    Tune in to the episode to explore the 10 ways to create your own sophisticated sanctuary.

    Find the Show Notes on the blog, The Simply Luxurious Life - https://thesimplyluxuriouslife.com/podcast436


    No. 42: How Stepping Away from Blaming Invites Real Healing — Un Moment de Méditation Oct 18, 2026
    Show notes

    Find the text for this mini-episode on The Simply Luxurious Life - https://thesimplyluxuriouslife.com/moment42


    No. 41: How We Build a Foundation to Invite More Fulfillment and Peace — Un Moment de Méditation Oct 11, 2026
    Show notes

    Find the text for this mini-episode on The Simply Luxurious Life - https://thesimplyluxuriouslife.com/moment41


    435: 7 Ways to Maintain Self-Fidelity Oct 07, 2026
    Show notes

    "In a world of fleeting trends, the most profound elegance is self-fidelity. Let your style be an authentic whisper of your spirit, not a borrowed shout. Cultivate your own taste; adorn yourself in truths, not trophies. The greatest rebellion is to remain unyieldingly yourself." —Anonymous

    In many ways it far easier in our world today to be true to ourselves, void of blindly following trends and cultural preferences as options abound of how to live, what to wear, what [fill in the blank of what we are trying to figure out], but at the same time, because the world is so loud with everyone having a microphone and video in their pockets should they want to use it, it can also be hard to know what our own self is. Are we rebelling against the cacophony or walking our own path? Are we singing our own song or is it a tune we heard unconsciously over and over again while going about our life from surrounding influences?

    One way to know we have arrived at least at a semblance of self-fidelity is when we are comfortable in our own company. No matter the length of time, when we choose to be with only ourselves, how comfortable are we? Are we at peace with the decisions we've made? Do we feel we can correct them if they need adjustment, and who are we adjusting them for? So long as it is for our peace and to bring a peace of mind to our days, then self-fidelity is part of our way of life far more abundantly than we may have given ourselves credit for.

    There will be times in my days when I ponder the life decisions that have brought me to the life I live today and it is often a pondering grounded in appreciation. While I could not have foreseen the decisions, each one, that would eventually lead me to Le Papillon, working from home, a pup as companion, garden to potter in and connecting with online readers in TSLL community from around the world, the simple truth is the fact that there wasn't a guidebook to lead me here assures me they were made, each decision, with a sincere heart. In alignment with what my true compass. Each decision made, not all easily, but hopeful that it would work out because if they did, I knew I would be energized, full of creative ideas to share and capable of living well.

    As you will see in point #7, one of the true tests to determine if we are living with the compass of self-fidelity as our guide is whether we have a detailed map of direction or not. Let me bring relief and skip ahead for a moment, not having one, at least not a detailed one, is a most promising thing indeed.

    Let's take a look at the entire list exploring how to maintain self-fidelity along our life journey:

    Explore the Full Show Notes on The Simply Luxurious Life blog - https://thesimplyluxuriouslife.com/podcast435


    No. 40: Simply Trying to Heal, Help and Awaken — Un Moment de Méditation Oct 04, 2026
    Show notes

    Find the text for this mini-episode on The Simply Luxurious Life - https://thesimplyluxuriouslife.com/moment40


    No. 39: 'Me Time''s Availability is Plentiful — Un Moment de Méditation Sep 27, 2026
    Show notes

    Find the text for this mini-episode on The Simply Luxurious Life - https://thesimplyluxuriouslife.com/moment39


    No. 38: Knowing What Not to — Un Moment de Méditation Sep 20, 2026
    Show notes

    Find the text for this mini-episode on The Simply Luxurious Life - https://thesimplyluxuriouslife.com/moment38


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