The Hard Drive Podcast

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Koopa Klaus Oct 14, 2019

Show notes

It's October and you know what that means, Hallowe—Christmas episode? Really? Alrighty, then. King Koopa has kidnapped Santa Claus, frozen all the elves, and is generally wreaking havoc on the North Pole. Good thing Mario and the gang took a wrong turn on their way to Hawaii Land and are here to save the day! In the live action, a young boy stops by because he ran away from home to teach his parents a lesson about not loving him enough and we get a whole darn flashback showing us the time Young Mario did that and everyone was happy about it. We discuss Christmas, the fact that the Mario show seemingly wrote every episode as fast as possible so as to premiere them all before it stopped being the '80s, and the time Mark played guitar with The Ataris!

Legend of Zelda: Doppelganger Oct 07, 2019

Show notes

Today’s live-action segment of The Super Mario Bros Super Show is so obscure that the best version we could track down is a subtitled Swedish video. As best as we can tell, Madonna’s car breaks down outside of Mario and Luigi’s apartment and she comes in to use their phone and bites a magic apple and falls in love with Mario and then does the exact same thing with Luigi. Oh wait sorry, it’s Mad Donna. She just looks like Madonna is the thing. Our mistake. In the animated part of this episode, veteran Legend of Zelda scribe Bob Forward gets some help on this week’s script from his sister Eve. Does the sibling collaboration make for a less horny and depraved episode of Zelda? No paisanos, it does not.

Mario Meets Koopzilla Sep 30, 2019

Show notes

Uuuuuuuuuuugggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggggghhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh. The Super Mario Bros. Super Show does a racist one. Mario and Luigi head to the city of Sayonara to stop Koopzilla who became the size of a building due to eating Super Sushi. In the live action, a fortune teller does schtick and the show literally inserts seven rimshots into the audio. Mark and Jeremy dissect and discuss this troubling episode in an otherwise 100% flawless run of extremely important television.

Mighty McMario and the Pot of Gold Sep 23, 2019

Show notes

Haha yes they do the WHOLE Irish thing. In today’s goddamn episode of The Super Mario Bros. Super Show, there’s some leprechaun who's having bad luck because his pot of gold coins was stolen by Koopa. So everyone drinks green beer and follows a rainbow and eats cabbage and all of that shit. In the live action segment, a self proclaimed teenage heartthrob seeks solace from his maniacal fans in the confines of Mario Bros Plumbing. Mark and Jeremy discuss the legend of Mr. Belvedere and his infamous sitting on his own balls incident at great length, and eventually seek outside perspective to help decipher the ramifications of this all.

20,000 Koopas Under the Sea w/ Gene Park Sep 16, 2019

Show notes

The great Gene Park from the Washington Post joins us on our trip to Ocean World to discuss the Super Show's parody of pretty much any famous story involving boats! Kooptain Nemo and his evil bloopers have arrived to defeat a metallic sea monster wreaking havoc on town even though it was very obviously created by Koopa. Meanwhile in the live action, the Mario Brothers are perplexed after meeting their FOURTH vampire. How the hell do these guys keep not knowing what a vampire is?! Every goddamn person they meet is a vampire!

Hooded Robin and His Mario Men Sep 09, 2019

Show notes

The Super Show makes some wild choices with this Robin Hood themed episode, most notably transforming the legendary hero into a bird that does impressions. Mark and Jeremy enjoy Hooded Robin and the gang’s adventures trying to thwart the Sheriff of Koopingham or steal their coins back or whatever’s going on. In the live action portion of the episode, Luigi eats some bad sauce and starts sprouting vegetables, prompting Mario to call over a farmer’s son who later grows up to be a television mogul. Leapin’ Linguini this is a weird one!

Legend of Zelda: That Sinking Feeling Sep 02, 2019

Show notes

This is one of the best episodes of the podcast ever. Mark and Jeremy lose their goddamn minds watching a truly awful episode of the Legend of Zelda in which Ganon drags all of Hyrule into the ground using a giant magnet and a Dog Man. In the live action, Mario and Luigi sing with a Little Richard parody named Little Robert in a segment we will have to sit through again in a few months because they used the exact same one twice. The boys talk Insane Clown Posse, the awfulness of HBO's hit 2012 show The Newsroom, and whether or not everything is OK.

Too Hot to Handle Aug 26, 2019

Show notes

Mark and Jeremy agree to agree that this episode of The Super Mario Bros Super Show kind of sucks. That, however, doesn’t stop them from having fun digging into this week’s very strange take on Hawaiian culture! Koopa impersonates a fire god and tells the townsfolk of Waki-Waki to chuck Princess Toadstool into a volcano, and so they chuck Princess Toadstool into a volcano. In the live action segment, a traveling hustler named Anjelica sells Luigi a watch that makes him do everything backwards. Stupid pretty it’s! Along the way, the boys discuss water cooler culture, whether or not this is all a dream, and the show’s first ever LVP award is bestowed. Bridge the to!

Mario and Joliet Aug 19, 2019

Show notes

Suprise: this episode is dumb and bizarre! Mario and the gang find themselves in the story of Romeo and Juliet — er, I mean Romano and Joliet — and King Koopa's pulling the strings in an actual arms race between the two warring families. Meanwhile, in the live action, some guy name Pietro shows up to announce that he's the long lost third Mario brother (and that he wants to sell the family business!) Is he the real deal? Find out in the section that the show titled "Fake Bro." Plus, we talk trampolines, our favorite skydiving movies, and the fact that no matter where Mario and Luigi wind up, every single side character sounds like some Italian lady from The Bronx.

Koopenstein Aug 12, 2019

Show notes

In the live action segment of today’s Super Mario Bros Super Show!, Susanna Ross (Yes, THAT Susanna Ross, the one they made up for this episode) has ditched her backup singers and knows just the plumbers she wants to replace them with. It’s Mario and Luigi! If you think this episode doesn’t end with them singing ‘Baby Love,’ in the basement dressed like Diana Ross & The Supremes, well then I have got something shocking to tell you. In the animated portion of the episode, Koopa wants to make a Frankenstein but then he slips and accidentally becomes a Frankenstein himself and so Mario and the crew have to Real Steel Koopa’s original Frankenstein so they can beat Koopa, who’s a Frankenstein now. Then Koopa falls in some water and it’s fine. At some point Toad yells “Toadronimo!” and it’s really just a whole lot of malarkey, frankly.

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