The Expat Mom Podcast

Latest Episodes:

The Power of Family Dinner May 30, 2023

Show notes

It's easy to put our confidence in fancy doctors, professionals, or books to know how to improve our children's mental and emotional health. And those things can be fantastic! Sometimes though, it's harder to trust simple routines and practices at home which can actually be as powerful or MORE powerful than more complex solutions. One of the most powerful tools we have at our disposal to help improve mental and emotional health in families is simply having family dinner together.
On the podcast we dive into all sorts of research that demonstrates the power of this practice. We also talk about how to overcome the common obstacles that keep families from having family dinner as often as they might like to. Maybe you are doing family dinner, but you don't feel like you're getting the benefits shared. I share some practical ways you can make family dinner meaningful so that it is creating the connection and relief it can offer your family.
Free Coaching Session with Jennie Linton
This is a great chance to try out coaching and see if it's a good fit for you.
Schedule
One-Minute Wisdom
Each week I carefully craft a short perspective shift or tool that you can read in about a minute or two. You can sign up here.
Follow me on Instagram or find more free resources on my website

Please leave a review on your favorite podcast app. It helps other people find it!

Emotional Debriefing: A Tool to Keep Kids from "Overflowing" Emotionally May 23, 2023

Show notes

TCKs emotional cup is full a lot of the time--meaning they are at the threshold of keeping it together. When an additional stressor is added, sometimes that cup just overflows. One of my favorite tools to help TCKs and Expat Families with is "The Debrief."
This is a tool developed by Lauren Wells, and TCK Training. Last year I certified to learn how to conduct debriefs for families. It's a way of periodically helping reduce the amount of liquid in your child's cup so they have more space to handle stress.
There are some pieces of debriefing you can do at home with your family regularly--no certification needed. This might look as simple as asking your kids what a "rose" and "thorn" was from the day. Or it might look as complicated as mapping out where you've lived, major events, and emotional impact on kids.
Having a chance to process challenging transitions and losses helps kids have more emotional space to handle hard things. Some things might also require a third party to help identify and process. I share more about it on this week's episode.
Learn more from TCK Training:
https://www.TCKTraining.com
Free Coaching Session with Jennie Linton
This is a great chance to consult about what a debrief might look like for your family or your child.
Schedule
One-Minute Wisdom
Each week I carefully craft a short perspective shift or tool that you can read in about a minute or two. You can sign up here.
Follow me on Instagram or find more free resources on my website

Please leave a review on your favorite podcast app. It helps other people find it!

How to Put on Emotionally Protective Armor for TCKs with Tanya Crossman May 16, 2023

Show notes

Part 1 of the interview with Tanya Crossman explored recent research on TCKs which showed pretty dire outcomes. However, Tanya Crossman offers hope to Expat parents how we can prevent mental health issues in our TCKs. It's amazing, the solutions aren't complex, but they do require that we be deliberate and consistent. As an adult TCK herself and having done years of research she's the perfect advocate to teach us how. Enjoy part 2 of this interview with researcher, coach, author, and expert Tanya Crossman.
Connect with Tanya Crossman
Cross-cultural consultant, TCK/CCK advocate
Author of Misunderstood: The Impact of Growing Up Overseas in the 21st Century

www.tanyacrossman.com
www.facebook.com/misunderstoodTCK
www.twitter.com/TanyaTCK
tcktraining.com/research
Free Coaching Session with Jennie Linton
Sign-up for a free coaching session. It can make a challenging relationship with a child into one of connection. It can make the resentment of expat life into a rich experience. It can help make a struggling marriage better, and good marriage amazing. It can take you from feeling overwhelmed to feeling better.
Schedule
One-Minute Wisdom
Each week I carefully craft a short perspective shift or tool that you can read in about a minute or two. You can sign up here.
Follow me on Instagram or find more free resources on my website

Please leave a review on your favorite podcast app. It helps other people find it!

Recent Research about TCKs and Mental Health with Tanya Crossman: Part 1 May 09, 2023

Show notes

Many books have been written about TCKs and some of the challenges and benefits of expat life for kids. But recent research puts numbers and specific outcomes to some of these factors, and the results might surprise you. In a study done on Adverse Childhood Events, TCKs had significantly more ACEs than their counterparts in their home country. These are predictive of a number of issues both mentally and physically. Soft research suggests that 85% of TCKs experience some sort of depression or anxiety. That is SIGNIFICANTLY higher than their monocultural counterparts. That's just one outcome of the TCK life. Tanya Crossman has done research TCKs for years and breaks down the research for us. But what I love about Tanya is that she shares not just the difficult news of how this life may be affecting our children, but also the hope of how we can prevent some of these experiences for TCKs. I love her line, "We believe that TCK life can be conducive to good mental health." It's possible, but it does require awareness and proactive work of expat parents. I hope you enjoy this interview and Tanya's wealth of knowledge.
Connect with Tanya Crossman
Cross-cultural consultant, TCK/CCK advocate
Author of Misunderstood: The Impact of Growing Up Overseas in the 21st Century

"Turning Towards": One Tool That Can Shift How You Feel About Your Partner May 03, 2023

Show notes

Each of us have a desire to be noticed, cared about, and understood by our partner. Gottman calls efforts to get this kind of connection is called “an emotional bid.” I love this name, because it brings up an image of an art auction with someone at the front looking around the room to see who is willing to pay money for this item. Someone in the audience might raise their finger to indicate they are interested. Essentially we do the same thing for each other. We hold up something for our partner, and we hope for our partner’s response—we want them to show they see us and value what we are offering. As partners, we get to decide whether we will turn toward or away from our partner's emotional bid. Whether or not we do this consistency has a predictive influence on the success of your partnership.
Free Coaching Session
Sign-up for a free coaching session. It can make a challenging relationship with a child into one of connection. It can make the resentment of expat life into a rich experiencees. It can help make a struggling marriage better, and good marriage amazing. It can take you from feeling overwhelmed to feeling better.
Schedule
One-Minute Wisdom
Each week I carefully craft a short perspective shift or tool that you can read in about a minute or two. You can sign up here.
Follow me on Instagram or find more free resources on my website

Please leave a review on your favorite podcast app. It helps other people find it!

Turning Assumptions Into Assets Apr 17, 2023

Show notes

Our brain naturally makes assumptions. It's an essential skill for our survival. Without this skill, we wouldn't be able to make decisions unless we had ALL the information--which is rarely the case. However, assumptions can also be detrimental to our relationships and happiness. They can cause us a lot of suffering and ruin our connections. On this podcast, we talk about when assumptions are useful and when they aren't. And we talk about how to minimize the damage unhelpful assumptions can cause.
Free Coaching Session
Sign-up for a free coaching session. It can make a challenging relationship with a child into one of connection. It can make the resentment of expat life into a rich experiencees. It can help make a struggling marriage better, and good marriage amazing. It can take you from feeling overwhelmed to feeling better.
Schedule
One-Minute Wisdom
Each week I carefully craft a short perspective shift or tool that you can read in about a minute or two. You can sign up here.
Follow me on Instagram or find more free resources on my website

Please leave a review on your favorite podcast app. It helps other people find it!

How to "Hold the Fort" in Split-Location Marriages with Rhoda Bangerter Apr 10, 2023

Show notes

It's really common for families in the expatriate community to be separated sometimes--either because one partner travels frequently, or one partner has an assignment and the rest of the family doesn't go.
These situations can be challenging for everyone in the family. It can be especially hard on the spouse who is at home "holding the fort" as Rhoda, my podcast guest, describes it. However, there are lots of tools that can help make this situation easier and help improve emotional health and the connections between family members not only despite the distance but even because of it.
Connect with Rhoda
Website: https://amulticulturallife.com/
Podcast: www.amulticulturallife.com/podcast
Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/amulticulturallife/
Free Mini-Coaching Session
Sign-up for a free 30-min. mini-coaching session. It can help make a struggling marriage better, and good marriage amazing.
Schedule
One-Minute Wisdom
Each week I carefully craft a short perspective shift or tool that you can read in about a minute or two. You can sign up here.
Follow me on Instagram or find more free resources on my website

Please leave a review on your favorite podcast app. It helps other people find it!

ENCORE EPISODE: Why You Can't *MAKE* Your Spouse Happy Mar 23, 2023

Show notes

Most of us were given the advice when we got married, “Do everything you can to make your spouse happy.” This sounds like such lovely and good advice. I agree that we should be loving and kind and sacrificing. But when we do these things with the expectation that it will make our spouse happy, very often we undermine our happiness and the happiness of our spouse. In other words when we do this we are people pleasing—doing something in order to manipulate someone’s response. There is a much healthier and much more fun way of cultivating happiness in your marriage.
What you’ll learn on the podcast

Why sometimes our spouse doesn’t feel happy even when we’re trying our best
Why trying to make our spouse happy can cause us to feel miserable
How trying to make our spouse happy can actually cause disconnection in our marriage
Why your spouse may not WANT us to try to make them happy
How to cultivate happiness in your marriage in a healthier way
How to create connection even when you don’t honor your spouse’s wishes
How to hold space for your spouse’s disappointment

Free Mini-Coaching Session
Sign-up for a free 30-min. mini-coaching session. It can help make a struggling marriage better, and good marriage amazing.
Schedule
One-Minute Wisdom
Each week I carefully craft a short perspective shift or tool that you can read in about a minute or two. You can sign up here.
Follow me on Instagram or find more free resources on my website

Please leave a review on your favorite podcast app. It helps other people find it!

Household Helpers Abroad: The Amazing, The Hard, & Navigating It All Mar 13, 2023

Show notes

One of the blessings of living in a developing country as an expat, can be having a household helper. It can be a wonderful way to learn about the host culture, and language, as well as have assistance figuring out new things like bleaching fruits and veggies, figuring out how to get around, paying your bills, and more. And then, there is the incredible blessing of having help around the house and with child care. It's great to be able to contribute to the local economy in a positive way. We have been SO thankful for the wonderful helpers that have blessed our family.
However, employing someone in your home also comes with some challenges, and it can lead to frustration and difficulty. I have certainly made lots of mistakes over the years. This is a conversation with a fellow veteran expat, Angi Solley. We discuss some of our takeaways about navigating having a household helper.
Contact Angi Solley
http://www.teenlines.com
Free Coaching Session with The Expat Mom
Sign-up for a free coaching session.
Schedule
One-Minute Wisdom
Each week I carefully craft a short perspective shift or tool that you can read in about a minute or two. You can sign up here.
Follow me on Instagram: @theexpatmomcoach or on Facebook: @theexpatmomcoach

Emotions Are Contagious Mar 06, 2023

Show notes

Has someone in your family ever gotten a cold? Within a few days, everyone in the family has one? Just like germs are contagious, so are emotions. Obviously, we don't pass microparticles to each other like bacteria, but we do have biological structures that cause us to mirror emotions in each other. On the podcast, we explore how this can be SO useful in our relationships and how it can also be destructive. I offer some tools to use this human phenomenon to build our relationships rather than destroy them.
Free Coaching Session with The Expat Mom
Sign-up for a free coaching session.
Schedule
One-Minute Wisdom
Each week I carefully craft a short perspective shift or tool that you can read in about a minute or two. You can sign up here.
Follow me on Instagram: @theexpatmomcoach or on Facebook: @theexpatmomcoach

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