THE COMPLETE DAD PODCAST

Latest Episodes:

Mental Health Matters Feb 09, 2022

Show notes

Showing up as our best selves is an admirable goal, and being strong, dependable fathers and husbands give immense meaning and purpose to our lives and the work we do on ourselves. Many of us have been conditioned to "suck it up", "man up" and in effect bury our emotions. Of course there are times and situations that require this of us, but this should not be our default when things get overwhelming.

Many of us believe that admitting we are struggling, or having emotional needs makes us look weak. We feel very uncomfortable being vulnerable, talking to others about our struggles or admitting that we are not really handling everything life is throwing us. We owe it to ourselves and our family to pay attention to our mental health and take action when we notice we are taking too much strain.

Taking our mental health seriously is a vital part of becoming the complete dad.

MONDAY MEDITATIONS | LIFE GOES ON...OR NOT. Feb 07, 2022

Show notes

We have all heard people say "life goes on" as a way to remind themselves that indeed when things go awry or when they experience loss or frustration, life continues. This helps us not get weighed down by the past and move beyond hurt and pain and disappointment.

But I believe keeping in mind that eventually, life doesn't go on and that keeping in mind death is certain for us all, helps remind us to live in the moment, to appreciate what we have and not take for granted our children. They will never be the same as they are now.

Nothing will ever come together as it is right now. So live it while you can.

So instead of wasting life worrying, being angry and living with regret, let's make each day the adventure it can be...along with the ups and downs.

CARRY LESS, LIVE MORE Feb 02, 2022

Show notes

“Most of what we say and do is not necessary, and its omission would save both time and trouble. At every step, therefore, a man should ask himself, 'Is this one of the things that are superfluous?' Moreover, not idle actions only but even idle impressions ought to be suppressed; for the unnecessary action will not ensue.” - Marcus Aurelius

How much time, energy and mind space do we give to unnecessary pursuits, things and thoughts?

How much are you carrying that is needlessly weighing you down, making an already challenging existence even more difficult.

How much have you "packed" into your life, so that little space remains for what could make a positive difference?

How much space is left for what truly matters?

Carry less, and see how that frees you up to live more.

MONDAY MEDITATIONS: DEALING WITH ANGER: STIMULUS AND CAUSE Jan 31, 2022

Show notes

“How much more harmful are the consequences of anger…than the circumstances that aroused them in us.” - Marcus Aurelius

What actually "makes" us angry?

Telling the difference between stimuli that trigger an emotional reaction and the actual root causes of our anger, and then following a four-step process, can help us to fully express our anger in a way that fosters strong communication and deeper connection with others.

THE IMPORTANCE OF CHECKING IN WITH OUR CHILDREN'S NEEDS Jan 27, 2022

Show notes

As we all know, life can get exceptionally busy and we can feel like we are being pushed from pillar to post. And with the way the world is moving and technology is developing it seems that things will only speed up. That is why it is imperative that we take time to slow down, stop and allow ourselves time to become more aware of the needs of our children, instead of reacting to their external behaviour while we rush around amid the noise of daily life. When check-in with them and how they are feeling and the real underlying causes, we are able to be empathetic to their needs and figure out more of the mystery that lies within each of our children. It is no easy task, but becoming more intentional and present in our interactions with our children, bares incredible fruit and deepest the connection they have with us and most importantly themselves and their emotions.

MONDAY MEDITATIONS | Not bad or wrong, just not meeting your needs Jan 24, 2022

Show notes

When we evaluate the behaviours that don't line up with our goals, vision and core values we tend to label them as bad or wrong. It helps to reframe these actions as not meeting our needs instead, and in turn, look at what it is that we as men genuinely need and what actions will meet them.

This takes away the guilt, shame or disappointment with ourselves and reinforcement of negative self-concepts and enables us to move forward with purpose and positive energy to make the necessary changes to meet our needs and then as a result the needs of the important people in our lives and beyond.

THE IMPORTANCE OF FINDING YOUR OWN PATH Jan 20, 2022

Show notes

Reading books, listening to podcasts, following personal development leaders or being part of a movement, are all good for building our knowledge and skills. Strong and successful men and women we look up to give us values and character and actions to emulate while we develop our own inner compass and ability to take ownership of our lives. Buying into a brand can help inspire and motivate us, make us feel like we are part of something bigger.

But there needs to come a time when we take all we have learned and practised and find what works best for us and our unique personalities and temperament and set of circumstances. We need to find our own path. Stand on our own two feet.

It is the only way we can become all that we are capable of being. Trying to be another version of someone else is a poor way to spend ones life, when being the best version of ourselves is waiting to bring us the contentment and joy we seek, and serves those around us best

MONDAY MEDITATIONS | Playing chess with yourself Jan 17, 2022

Show notes

Your greatest adversary and your greatest ally is yourself. Trying to control all the circumstances and people around you and thinking this will bring the results you want is a waste of time and energy.

Let's rather put our focus on figuring out which pieces are "on each side of our board", and what moves are going to strengthen or weaken our position.

Let's recognise the unutilised pieces left that are just waiting to show up for us, and identify those pieces we have to stop from wreacking havoc in our lives and preventing us from being the men we are capable of being.

Whether it is the long or short game, taking the time to think, be intentional and self-aware sets us up for victory in every aspect of our lives. Learning to conquer ourselves is job number one.

BERT SORIN | BUILT TO SERVE: Present. Authentic. Legendary. Jan 13, 2022

Show notes

This rebroadcast of my truly impactful and honest conversation with Bert Sorin. Bert is currently the President and Co-Owner of Sorinex Exercise Equipment, a very successful family run business founded by his father, Richard. He is a true inspirer and connector of men who are on a mission to be the best version of themselves.In this episode we talk about how success in life doesn't happen by accident: good fathers are not born, they are made. Bert discusses how is up to each one of us to make the hard decisions and be willing to sacrifice in order to show up in ways that set our kids up for a fulfilling and meaningful life. He challenges us to recognise that allthough we might think that these sacrifices bring pain and discomfort, the fact is that they almost always lead to far greater satisfaction than momentary pleasures, ego driven behaviors and just going with the flow. Bert also shares his journey he has taken to being the man and father he is today and the value of admitting weakness and that realizing we aren't "the man" is what plays a big part us in actually moving closer to being the man of value, humility and grit we should be aspiring to be. It is an entertaining, honest and inspiring conversation, that will leave you with many takeaways to apply immediately as a husband, father and friend.

MONDAY MEDITATIONS| The art of communicating effectively with our children Jan 10, 2022

Show notes

I often see, mostly in retrospect, how my lack of effective communication skills not only doesn't resolve conflict or situations, but in fact leads to further negativity, wasted time and energy and strained relationships. Learning how to effectively communicate with our children and doing so in a self-aware and intentional manner is essential for creating the connection with our children that will allow us to be influential in their lives as understanding and turst are developed. Our own state of mind is pivotal in communicating effectively and lovingly with our kids, who are the most important people to us in the world. Slowing down, taking a breath, observing the situation first lays the foundation for then identifying feelings and true needs and hearing their requests in a calm and clear manner.

As fathers we too need to learn to express our own feelings and needs. We need to slow down and make our requests clear and understood in a way that brings our children into deeper relationship with us, where they feel loved and understood and a part of decisions.

Effective communication is an art, and often we tend to practise it in the workplace or with friends, but struggle in the home where it is most important. We all know what it was like when adults talk at us, make demands and have no time or patience to listen to us. Let's be different with our own children.

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