The Art of Charm

Latest Episodes:

The Art of Engaging Small Talk Toolbox Nov 07, 2022

Show notes

In today’s episode, we cover talking to strangers with AJ and Johnny.

You never know what friend, business partner, or love interest you’ll meet by striking up a conversation with strangers in your daily life, but how do you create engaging conversations with anyone, what two things do you need for great conversations, and how do you make an unforgettable first impression?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
How is technology harming our ability to hold conversations and how do we overcome it?
Why is it important to your health and social life to make small talk with strangers?
Simple Techniques for Talking to Strangers – 23:16
What tips can you use to have fun conversations with strangers?
How do you know what to talk about with strangers?
How do you give a compliment to a stranger?
The Art of Charm Conversation Formula – 37:05
What is the formula for great conversations?
How do you have a good conversation with anyone?
What are the two things you need to have great conversations?
Why is vulnerability important in conversations and how can you be vulnerable without being too vulnerable?

Small talk is important because it helps us to get to know other people, learn about new things, and build relationships. It can also help you feel more connected and socialize when you may be feeling lonely or isolated. To know what to talk about with strangers, think about the setting you’re in and try to find a common ground or interest that you share. The formula for great conversations is simple: ask open-ended questions, listen attentively, and then share something personal about yourself. Having a good conversation with anyone is all about being vulnerable and letting your guard down a little bit. Don’t be afraid to share some of your own experiences or feelings, as long as you do so in a way that isn’t overwhelming or off-putting.

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Resources from this Episode

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Why Boys Are Falling Behind & Three Steps You Can Take to Propel Them to Success | Richard Reeves Oct 31, 2022

Show notes

In today’s episode, we cover masculinity with Richard Reeves. Richard is a senior fellow at the Brookings Institution, where he directs the Future of the Middle Class Initiative and co-directs the Center on Children and Families, and is the author of several books including his latest, Of Boys and Men: Why the Modern Male Is Struggling, Why It Matters, and What to Do about It.

Western culture is experiencing a masculinity crisis, so what does mature masculinity look like in today’s society, what defines toxic masculinity vs mature masculinity, and how do we start instilling masculinity in our boys?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
What are the trends in education and how are they impacting the genders?
Why is there a lack of male teachers?
The Crisis of Fatherhood – 24:07
What role should fathers play moving forward?
What does mature masculinity look like in modern society and how do we instill it in our children?
Toxic Masculinity – 38:15
What is the difference between mature masculinity and toxic masculinity?
What role do rites of passage play in the transition from boyhood to manhood and what consequences do we face as a culture without them?
Where do we start if we want to revitalize the masculinity in our society?
The Gender Pay Gap is a Parenting Gap – 59:07
What is the reason for the gender pay gap?

Masculinity is not a dirty word. It’s time to reclaim it and redefine it for the modern world. We can start by teaching our children what mature masculinity looks like, modeling healthy behavior ourselves, and creating spaces where men can gather to discuss these issues. Together we can shift the paradigm of toxic masculinity and work towards a more inclusive society that celebrates all forms of masculinity.

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Resources from this Episode

Richard Reeves website
Of Boys and Men: Why the Modern Male Is Struggling, Why It Matters, and What to Do about It by Richard Reeves

Check in with AJ and Johnny!

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3 Secrets to Instantly Win Anyone Over from a Corporate Spy | Robert Kerbeck Oct 24, 2022

Show notes

In today’s episode, we cover social engineering and corporate espionage with Robert Kerbeck. Robert is the founder of the Malibu Writers Circle, his essays and short stories have been featured in numerous magazines and literary journals, and his new memoir, RU$E: Lying the American Dream from Hollywood to Wall Street, is a thrilling look into his career as a secret corporate spy.

Espionage has been around for as long as people have kept secrets, but what do corporate spies do to get information from unsuspecting employees, what should you be on the lookout for to protect yourself and your company, and how do you become a corporate spy?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
How do you become a corporate spy?
How do corporate spies prepare for deceptive calls with competitors?
Corporate Espionage Tools of the Trade – 13:36
What is a false time constraint and how do scammers and spies use them to manipulate you?
How do scammers and corporate spies manipulate you to get whatever information they want?
How do corporate spies receive new assignments?
The different ways Corporate Espionage is used – 31:24
How do corporations use corporate spies to find new employees and executive leaders?
How do corporate spies leverage fear to get what they want out of you?

In order to protect yourself from becoming a victim of corporate espionage, it is important to be aware of the tools and tactics that scammers and spies use. By understanding how they operate, you can be better prepared to defend yourself against their attempts to manipulate you into giving away sensitive information. Remember, always be skeptical of unsolicited calls or emails and never give out personal information or passwords without verifying the caller’s identity first.

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Resources from this Episode

Robert Kerbeck’s website
RUSE: Lying the American Dream from Hollywood to Wall Street by Robert Kerbeck

Check in with AJ and Johnny!

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How to Become Successful Through Discomfort | Sterling Hawkins Oct 17, 2022

Show notes

In today’s episode, we cover hunting discomfort with Sterling Hawkins. Sterling is the CEO and founder of the Sterling Hawkins Group, a research, training and development company focused on human and organizational growth, and is the author of Hunting Discomfort: How to Get Breakthrough Results in Life and Business No Matter What.

Discomfort is an inevitable aspect of getting anywhere in life, so what are the 5 kinds of discomfort we all face, what are the ways we all deal with discomfort that make it worse, and how can you leverage discomfort to turn your dreams into a reality?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
Why do you risk everything you’ve worked for when you avoid discomfort?
What are the 3 default ways we try to deal with discomfort that only make the discomfort worse?
How to Evolve through Discomfort – 11:20
What can you do to adopt a mindset that embraces discomfort and leverages discomfort to evolve as a person?
What are the 3 kinds of beliefs and how do they drive everything you do?
Hunting Discomfort vs Danger – 20:11
What is the difference between seeking out discomfort and doing dangerous things because they’re dangerous?
What are the 5 types of discomforts we all face?
The Necessity of Discomfort – 40:50
What can you commit to in order to force yourself to get comfortable with discomfort?

Discomfort is a part of life. It’s what we do with discomfort that determines whether or not it will have a negative impact on our lives. When we avoid discomfort, we risk everything we’ve worked for. But when we embrace discomfort, we can grow as individuals and achieve things we never thought possible. So how do you start embracing discomfort? You can start by making a commitment to yourself get comfortable with discomfort. And then you can begin to experiment with different ways of introducing discomfort into your everyday life so that it becomes a regular part of your existence. Are you ready to take the challenge?

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Resources from this Episode

Check in with AJ and Johnny!

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6 Working Styles Every Team Needs to Succeed | Patrick Lencioni Oct 10, 2022

Show notes

In today’s episode, we cover the different work genius skills with Patrick Lencioni. Patrick is founder and president of The Table Group, a firm dedicated to helping leaders improve their organizations’ health and the author of ten business books including his most recent work, The 6 Types of Working Genius: A Better Way to Understand Your Gifts, Your Frustrations, and Your Team.

Knowing what kind of work your personality is inclined toward can make the difference between loving your work and hating it, having an innovative team and a failing team, so what are the different types of work and how can you leverage them to achieve incredible success?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
Why do we get frustrated at work and what is triggering this?
What are the skills necessary to fully function in any work environment?
Different Kinds of Working Genius – 5:32
What are the different types of working skills we already have and the skills we still need to develop?
What are the benefits of learning and knowing how these skills can change our work environment?
What Type of Worker Are You? – 18:28
How do you behave within the team and how do you react to different situations?
Are you tenacious, love to push things forward, and make sure they get done?
Interpreting the Assessment Results – 32:54
What can you do when you think your co-workers are outsmarting and outperforming you?
What is the concept of quiet-quitting and why is it causing companies to lose their genius talents?

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Resources from this Episode

Check in with AJ and Johnny!

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5 Simple Steps To Build A High Value Social Circle & Avoid Value Vampires | Toolbox Oct 03, 2022

Show notes

In today’s episode, we cover the science behind the hidden power of relationships with AJ and Johnny.

The people in your life can you lead you to success or failure, joy or frustration—so how do you know what influence people and their friends are having on your life, how can you be a high value person to attract high value friendships and relationships, and what steps can you take to upgrade your social circle?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
What influence do the people around you have on your happiness and ability to achieve your goals?
How do you handle relationships that have a negative influence on your life?
High Value vs Low Value Behavior – 10:55
What does it mean to be high value and why should you avoid low value behaviors if you don’t want to lose great friendships and relationships?
What are the benefits of being high value as much as possible?
Inescapable Influence of Friends and Family – 23:01
How can your life be influenced by the friends of friends you don’t even know and what can you do to mitigate the harm they cause?
Can you filter out the negative influences of certain friends so you can keep them around for the positive influences?
Curate Your Social Circle – 47:30
What steps can you take to upgrade your existing social circle so your friends, family members, and coworkers support you rather than bring you down?
What is the difference between venting and gossiping and how should you respond to each one?

Other people are capable of having a significant impact on your life. If you let them, the right ones can set up conditions for success while leaving behind only pleasant memories and happy moments in their wake - but how do we determine which individuals will provide us with these opportunities? And more importantly: what can we do when our friends begin steering clear-cut paths towards failure or discontentment instead by trying to guide themselves into successful futures through less than honest means such as cheating at sports games etc.

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Resources from this Episode

What Are Social Skills? A Value Vampire Has No Clue

Check in with AJ and Johnny!

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Learn 4 Powerful Conversations That Connect Us All | Chuck Wisner Sep 26, 2022

Show notes

In today’s episode, we cover conscious conversations with Chuck Wisner. Chuck is a business and personal consultant and an advisor to leaders in high-profile companies in several industries such as Google, Rivian, Apple, and Tesla, and is the author of The Art of Conscious Conversations: Transforming How We Talk, Listen, and Interact.

Conversations are an important aspect of running a business with employees, so what conversations should you be having with your employees and what types of questions should you ask?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
How many different kinds of conversations are there and why do you need to know them all?
Advocacy vs Inquiry – 22:55
Why is it important to balance advocacy for yourself and inquiring about others?
The 4 Questions to Ask in Conversations – 34:16
What kinds of questions should you ask yourself when you’re talking to someone if you want to spark more engaging conversations?
Conversational Bypass – 48:30
Why is it important to touch on all four types of conversations in business and planning meetings in order to get the most out of your team?

The next time you’re in a meeting, think about how you can use all four conversation types to get your point across. When you advocate for yourself and inquire about others, it will create a more balanced and engaging discussion. Asking the right questions of yourself before talking to someone can help set the tone for a more productive exchange. Touching on all four conversation types is important in business because it allows for different perspectives to be explored and helps everyone feel heard.

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Resources from this Episode

Check in with AJ and Johnny!

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

6 Easy Steps To Working Hard and Avoiding Burnout | Brad Stulberg Sep 19, 2022

Show notes

In today’s episode, we cover groundedness with Brad Stulberg. Brad coaches executives, entrepreneurs, physicians, and athletes on health, well-being, and sustainable excellence, and is the bestselling author of The Practice of Groundedness: A Transformative Path to Success that Feeds -- Not Crushes -- Your Soul.

Being present is harder than ever in a world with a million things fighting for our attention, so what can you do to stay grounded in a world of distractions, what mindset can you adopt to work hard without burning out, and build a community that keeps your carries your momentum forward?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
What is groundedness and what does it mean to practice groundedness?
The Principles of Groundedness – 10:22
What practice can you implement to accept where you are in the moment so you can make better decisions about where to go next?
What is the best thing you can do if you feel like you’re in a hole and time has slowed down to a crawl?
The Key to Feeling Good and Being Happy – 20:31
What piece of ancient wisdom is repeated throughout history when it comes to feeling good and being happy?
What can you do to limit the distractions in your life so you can start your day productively and with a clear mind?
Vulnerability and Confidence – 41:50
How can you leverage vulnerability to build more confidence?
What is deep community and how does it help you achieve groundedness?

When it comes to happiness, feeling good, and crushing life, there is one ancient wisdom that keeps popping up throughout history. That ancient wisdom is groundedness. Groundedness means living in the present moment, being connected to your body and your surroundings, and having a clear mind. It’s about being fully aware of what is happening around you and within you. Practicing groundedness can help you limit distractions so you can start your day productively, build more confidence by leveraging vulnerability, and feel happier and more content in life. What will you do today to start living more grounding?

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Resources from this Episode

Check in with AJ and Johnny!

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5 Tips To Lead Like A Navy SEAL In Any Setting | Dan Luna Sep 12, 2022

Show notes

In today’s episode, we cover leadership and motivation with Dan Luna. Dan formed 3LX Consulting in 2019 to empower leaders through coaching products that combine academics, consulting, and coaching, after a twenty-year career in the United States Navy SEAL Teams.

Leadership is a skill that requires conscious effort to develop, but how do we define leadership, what daily practices can you utilize to improve your leadership, and what can you do to lead and motivate your team to achieve their potential?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
What does leadership mean to a Navy SEAL?
Leadership Skill Transference – 10:42
How do you transfer your leadership skills from one area of your life to another?
What can you do to develop self-awareness so you know where you are lacking when it comes to leadership?
How to Start Journaling for Leadership Development – 30:51
What can you do start journaling from a leadership perspective to develop your leadership skills?
How do You Motivate Other Leaders – 43:10
How do we define motivation so we are better able to motivate other leaders and team members?
What areas can we highlight for team members to help them uncover the motivation to achieve their goals?
What can you do to give great feedback people will listen to?

Leaders are not born but they are made. You can become a better leader by taking the time to journal your thoughts and experiences from a leadership perspective. This will help you develop an understanding for what motivates you and how you can motivate others. When it comes to giving feedback, make sure that you take the time to understand the person’s perspective before offering any criticism. Feedback is most effective when it is specific, actionable, and positive.

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Resources from this Episode

Check in with AJ and Johnny!

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

3 Ingredients to Build Empathy and Foster Deep Relationships | Geoffrey Cohen Sep 05, 2022

Show notes

In today’s episode, we cover the concept of belonging with Geoffrey Cohen. Cohen is the James G. March Professor of Organizational Studies in Education and Business, professor of psychology and, by courtesy, at the Graduate School of Business at Stanford University, and the author of Belonging: The Science of Creating Connection and Bridging Divides.

Humans are social creatures and our health is tied to our social bonds, so what happens when we lose the sense of belonging, what can you do to improve your ability to foster that connection with others, and how do you develop the empathy necessary to connect with people from all walks of life?

What to Listen For

Introduction – 0:00
What does it mean to belong and what happens to us when we don’t feel a sense of belonging?
Situation Crafting – 20:48
What is situation crafting and how can you leverage it to accomplish your goals?
What simple tricks can you use to accelerate your progress toward changing or improving your behavior?
Turning Knowledge into Action – 35:30
How do you take information you learn in one area and apply it to other areas of your life to save time and energy?
What are the three ingredients necessary to effect change on an individual level?
How to connect with people across different beliefs – 45:10
What obstacles get in the way of connecting with people who have different beliefs than your own?
How do you develop empathy for cultures or belief systems you have no experience with?

We all want to feel like we belong, that we are a part of something larger than ourselves. When we don’t have that sense of belonging, it can be damaging both mentally and emotionally. But what if there were ways to create a sense of belonging for yourself? What if you could use the power of situation crafting to your advantage? There are simple tricks you can use to get started on this journey and develop empathy for cultures or belief systems that are new to you. The bottom line is that developing a sense of belonging is crucial to our well-being as humans. With the right tools and information, you can find belonging in even the most difficult situations.

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Resources from this Episode

Check in with AJ and Johnny!

Learn more about your ad choices. Visit megaphone.fm/adchoices

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