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The Allender Center Podcast — Christianity
The Allender Center Podcast

The Allender Center Podcast features Dr. Dan Allender and his team engaging topics on healing and restoration through the unique intersection of theology and psychology. Through questions submitted by listeners, stories, interviews, and conversations, we engage the deep places of heartache and hope that are rarely addressed so candidly in our culture today. Join us to gain refreshing insight into understanding your story, handling relational struggles, recovering from trauma and abuse, and more.

The mission of The Allender Center is to help people tell their stories with awareness and integrity, and to train them to listen to the stories of others with care, artistry, and skill so that they may foster redemption and healing in their lives. The Allender Center is a pioneering organization committed to boldly engaging the impact of trauma and abuse, providing healing and teaching to individuals, couples, and communities, and training professionals to listen and enter into stories in a way that facilitates transformation and hope. For information on all our programs and live events, visit theallendercenter.org

Latest Episodes:

The Cost of Engaging Stories of Sexual Abuse Mar 15, 2024

Show notes

This week's conversation dives into a difficult but essential topic: addressing past experiences of sexual abuse. We understand the weightiness of this subject and approach it with sensitivity and care. At the Allender Center, this work is central to our mission, and while it's undeniably challenging, we've also witnessed its profound goodness. Our journey toward healing doesn't involve bypassing the pain but rather moving through it.

Dan and Rachael navigate the complexities of addressing sexual abuse, acknowledging the costs - both internal and external - that survivors face. They compassionately explore the impact trauma has on the body, relationships, and spirituality. Rachael eloquently expresses the intricate nature of this process, recognizing the need to navigate the debris of past harm while holding space for the potential for growth and beauty.

The conversation extends to the ripple effects on relationships, including disruptions within familial, marital, and friendship dynamics. Dan emphasizes the importance of having supportive allies who understand the complexities of the healing journey, even as it may challenge existing relational dynamics.

In the spiritual realm, Rachael and Dan delve into the complexities of wrestling with faith in the aftermath of sexual abuse. They bravely confront questions and doubts about God's role in suffering while also acknowledging the possibility of deepened intimacy and connection with the divine.

We invite you to find solace, insights, and encouragement in this discussion. We recognize the immense courage it takes to embark on a journey of healing and restoration. It is our firm belief that it's possible to reclaim your identity and discover hope amidst the pain.

Please note that this episode contains discussions of sexual abuse and childhood sexual abuse, as well as brief explicit language that may be offensive to some listeners. Listener discretion is advised.

Racial Trauma: The Blessing & Cost of Resilience Mar 08, 2024

Show notes

In this week's episode of the Allender Center Podcast, Linda Royster and Wendell Moss lead a profound discussion on the intricate dynamics of trauma, resilience, and the transformative role of community healing, particularly in the context of racial trauma.

They discuss the profound impact of both personal and collective trauma, recognizing its reverberations across communities. They highlight the importance of not just surviving, but actively processing and learning from one's experiences. Conversely, they discuss how unhealthier forms of resilience, such as avoidance or denial of one's trauma, may actually impede the healing process.

A poignant theme emerges as they emphasize the significance of facing one's story with courage and vulnerability, rather than turning away from it. They point out that resilience is not merely surviving but actively engaging with one's narrative and inviting others into that process.

If you'd like to hear more from Linda and Wendell, we invite you to explore the Racial Trauma & Healing offerings from the Allender Center at theallendercenter.org/racial-trauma-and-healing . There you'll find a free informational video series and details about our upcoming Story Workshop for Racial Trauma & Healing and our new Women's Recovery Week with a Focus on Racial Trauma & Healing, both happening this spring.

The Foundations of Narrative Focused Trauma Care Mar 01, 2024

Show notes

What exactly is Narrative Focused Trauma Care? It's grounded in the belief that healing is not only possible but also essential to the unfolding gospel story within and around us. This holistic approach integrates psychology and theology to holistically engage the heartbreaking impact of trauma and abuse with compassion and care through story.

The Allender Center specializes in training people to understand their own stories in order to more deeply enter the lives of those they are called to love and serve. We come alongside to equip and develop skills for wading into the difficult waters of heartache, trauma, and abuse.

The foundations of Narrative Focused Trauma Care are unpacked in Level I training, where you'll explore your own narratives and those of others, with the ultimate goal of moving towards healing – for yourself, your relationships, and the broader community, paving the way for future generations

In this episode, Dan and Rachael will lead us through the four intensive weekends of Narrative Focused Trauma Care Level I training, offering insights into what participants can expect and some of the transformative experiences that wait for you.

Dan emphasizes, "We want people to imagine in the small and in whatever ways they are drawn to dream, to begin to move into… better trauma care through story and ultimately the story of Jesus."

Be sure to catch the first part of this two-part conversation where we go deeper into the "why" behind Narrative Focused Trauma Care.

The Heart of Narrative Focused Trauma Care Feb 23, 2024

Show notes

We believe that healing, wholeness, connection, and flourishing are not just possibilities - it's what we're made for. We're meant to know and to be known.

Join Dan and Rachael as they guide you through a profound exploration of Narrative Focused Trauma Care and its theological roots. This conversation shares some of the "why" behind our healing and training offerings at the Allender Center.

They delve into the Genesis narrative, illuminating the intersection between beauty and brokenness, tracing the shattering of shalom, and recognizing the lasting impact of trauma.

Dan introduces the concept of "already and not yet," framing salvation as a journey encompassing past, present, and future. The conversation emphasizes the intricate interplay between brokenness and beauty, acknowledging humanity's struggle to find connection amidst trauma.

Get ready for an insightful exploration that will deepen your understanding of Narrative Focused Trauma Care and its theological foundations, as we journey together toward healing and hope.

Be sure to join us next week to unpack the specifics of Narrative Focused Trauma Care and the training process involved in this holistic approach.

Qualities of a Good Friendship Feb 16, 2024

Show notes

Forming new, meaningful adult friendships or maintaining friendships throughout different seasons of life can be challenging. Can you really be friends with coworkers or the other parents at your kids' soccer games? And how do you tell if someone's just an acquaintance or a true friend?

What makes a friendship strong? How can you tell if you're a good friend and if someone's a good friend to you?

Dan and Rachael take a look at the joy, depth, and sometimes messy beauty of genuine connections between people. From shared purposes to meaningful conversations and navigating conflicts with grace, they explore the essential ingredients of true friendship.

The Sweetness of Discipline Feb 10, 2024

Show notes

"Everyone's disciplined for what they love," states Dr. Dan Allender.

The quest for becoming "more disciplined" prompts questions about motivation. Is it fueled by a higher purpose or overshadowed by shame and guilt? Does discipline revolve around self-control or simply a desire for control? What are the costs of being disciplined - and what goodness results from it?

In their discussion, Dan and Rachael dive into these questions and more. They explore the complexities of discipline, the significance of small disciplined actions, and the sustaining power of delight and beauty.

Leadership, Uncertainty, and Hope with Dr. J. Derek McNeil Feb 02, 2024

Show notes

This week, Dr. J. Derek McNeil, the president of The Seattle School of Theology and Psychology, engages in a candid dialogue with Dr. Dan Allender, exploring the multifaceted challenges of leading in today's turbulent times.

Whether you hold a formal leadership role or not, this conversation speaks to the universal nature of leadership. Whether as a parent, grandparent, or friend, each of us has a level of influence on others and grapples with the burden of providing guidance amid uncertainty.

The conversation explores the tension between agency and dependence, and the balancing act of taking action and surrendering to a larger divine plan.

Derek candidly shares his journey, grappling with the uncertainties of life while prioritizing his mental, physical, and spiritual well-being. Drawing from his upbringing and faith tradition, he finds solace in scripture, particularly Jeremiah 29:11, during moments of uncertainty and despair. His emphasis on cultivating a support system and fostering collaboration underscores the importance of community in leadership roles.

As you engage with this conversation between two insightful leaders, we hope it deepens your understanding of the complexities of leadership and sparks a sense of renewed hope amid life's uncertainties.

Engaging Stories of Spiritual Abuse Jan 26, 2024

Show notes

Join Dan and Rachael as they continue last week's discussion about spiritual abuse. This week, they shift their focus to the healing process, exploring the challenges of naming and reconciling our experiences with spiritual abuse, particularly the difficulty in trusting others with our stories.

Spiritual abuse casts a shadow, creating a landscape of distrust, fragmentation, and isolation, often cutting us off from the very thing that can help us heal - one another.

Drawing from years of conducting Story Workshops, Dan and Rachael underscore the transformative power found in the collective sharing of our stories. It is this understanding that has led to the creation of the Story Workshop for Spiritual Abuse & Healing, which is designed to serve as a safe space for sharing, grieving, and hopefully, discovering more of the goodness of God within your own story. If you've felt the impact of spiritual abuse and are seeking a supportive, facilitated community to navigate the healing process, consider joining this transformative Story Workshop, happening March 15-17, 2024. You can learn more at theallendercenter.org/workshops

Identifying Systems of Spiritual Abuse Jan 19, 2024

Show notes

As we prepare for our upcoming Story Workshop for Spiritual Abuse & Healing, Dan and Rachael return to discuss to the insidious issue of spiritual abuse and the broken systems that perpetuate this type of harm.

As many systems around us are crumbling, we hear story after story about overt abuse and misuse of power in high-profile churches and ministries. We also know that spiritual abuse can manifest across a spectrum, with some individuals perpetrating harm knowingly, while others may unknowingly be influenced by the systems they are part of, operating with good intentions or lacking awareness of subtle forms of spiritual abuse.

Listen to learn how to recognize some of the subtleties of spiritual abuse – and also consider how to lean in as we personally and collectively seek redemption. Knowing that every system bears some brokenness, the question becomes: how do we participate? Can we actively seek healing and redemption without giving in to cynicism?

Join us next week for a follow-up to today's conversation. If you have experienced spiritual abuse in your own life, we invite you to join us for the upcoming Story Workshop for Spiritual Abuse & Healing. Registration is now open at theallendercenter.org/events.

Containment and Attunement Jan 12, 2024

Show notes

Containment is both something that we need to receive and it's something that we can provide for others in our roles as parents, spouses, friends, and members of a greater community - particularly during challenging times.

Containment is not about control or maintaining the status quo; instead, it involves creating a safe space for others to express emotions and navigate difficulties.

The concept of containment is closely tied to attunement, which means being aware of others' needs and understanding our own capacity as well.

If you've heard about these concepts but want a deeper understanding and practical implementation in your life, we hope this episode offers you an insightful introduction.

Listener Resources:

To take a deeper dive into the concepts of containment, attunement, and attachment theory in your own life, particularly as they relate to your family of origin, and learn to provide spaces of containment and healing for others, we recommend enrolling in the Story Sage Series online course from the Allender Center.

If you're a visual learner, we also recommend checking out Lindsay Braman's article and stunning sketchnotes which wonderfully explain the concepts of containment and attunement.

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