Stay ConnectedTraditional marriage counseling and marriage coaching will tell you to work on communication. A pastor might tell you to sacrifice more and forget about yourself.
But, what actually works when it comes to creating a strong, passionate marriage? One that’s full of love, connection and intimacy?
Find out with us on our podcast, Strong Men Strong Marriages.
Hosted by psychiatrist and marriage coach Mike Frazier, MD
Copyright: © 2024 Strong Men Strong Marriages
The reason you’re not as connected to your wife as you’d like to be is because you’ve hurt her in some way.
That might be an obvious way, like an affair.
Or it may be a more subtle way, like neglecting her over time or serving her with “strings attached” (mosquito behaviors).
Either way, you have created disconnection by hurting her.
Most men try to fix this by trying to tell their wife they’re sorry and to move forward.
But that doesn’t work.
Learn what DOES work in this episode.
Watch on YouTube here.
Summary:
-After you hurt your wife, she is asking “can I trust him?” and “will he hurt me again?”
-She draws closer as the starts to believe she can trust you, then pulls away when she’s afraid you might hurt her again
-Your job is to be consistent, trustworthy, manage your emotions, and communicate clearly (including the hard stuff)
-If you were hurt, remember you can’t rush trust. It has to be earned. Be patient with yourself. Make appropriate requests and set appropriate boundaries
-Consider coaching to help you through the process
Mike
P.S. If you’re looking for marriage coaching, as an individual or a couple, I’d love to see if we’d be a good fit to work together. CLICK HERE to schedule a free 20 minute consult. We’ll discuss where you are in your marriage, where you want to be, if I can help you get there, and about how long it will take to get there. CLICK HERE to schedule and we’ll talk soon!
P.S. Get the 7 Day Email Series: How To Be More Attractive To Your Wife at StrongMen.io
Are you married to a narcissist or a sadist?
Probably.
But so is your spouse!
In this episode, you’ll learn what narcissism and sadism REALLY are…
How YOU most likely have BOTH of these traits…
And what to do about it.
Watch on YouTube here.
Summary:
-Narcissism is needing to be “one up” on your spouse
-It’s also understanding the emotions of others, but not really caring about them
-Sadism is enjoying inflicting pain or suffering on other people
-Usually takes the form of enjoying your spouse’s failures, or enjoying denying them what they want
-Learn to see these traits in yourself, admit them and get feedback on them
-As you notice them in others, call them out and act in a more useful way
Mike
P.S. I hope you enjoyed today’s episode. If you did, please write a review on iTunes or wherever you are listening, and share this podcast with a friend, so we can create stronger men and stronger marriages across the world.
And, if you’re ready to take your marriage to the next level, visit CLICK HERE to schedule a free 20 minute consult. We’ll discuss where you are in your marriage, where you want to be, if I can help you get there and about how long it will take to get there.
Whether you’re wanting to do the work on your own, or as a couple… if you’re ready to work hard and have fun doing it, I’d love to be your coach. CLICK HERE to schedule your consult and I’ll see you there.
P.S. Get the 7 Day Email Series: How To Be More Attractive To Your Wife at StrongMen.io
Love. A word that can mean SO many different things.
And confusion about what kind of love belongs in marriage causes LOTS of marriage problems.
In this episode we’ll discuss the 3 most valuable types of love in marriage…
And how to develop them.
Listen on Strong Men Strong Marriages here. https://podcasts.apple.com/us/podcast/strong-men-strong-marriages/id1513290707
Watch on YouTube here. https://youtu.be/mlqgP2r9XTk
Summary:
-Agape, or unconditional love, belongs in marriage. BUT, your spouse can’t give it to you, and you can’t give it to your spouse. You need to get it from an infinite source.
-Philia, or companionship love. This is essential for a great marriage. Committing to being great partners for each other for life.
-Eros, or romantic, sexual love. What distinguishes marriage from other close, philia, relationships.
-If you’re not getting the kind of love you want, make sure you’re offering it in an attractive way, then ask for what you want effectively, and choose what YOU will do if your request is not granted (set a boundary).
Mike
P.S. The Strong Man System as it currently exists, with lifetime access to support from me, will be offered for the LAST TIME this week. If a lifetime of Q&A with me and lifetime upgrades to the program are something you’re interested in, you’ll want to make sure to join by midnight on Saturday, February 13th (just in time for Valentine’s Day). CLICK HERE to join.
P.S. Get the 7 Day Email Series: How To Be More Attractive To Your Wife at StrongMen.io
Is your married sex life not quite what you’re hoping for?
Is it happening less often than you’d like, or does it just seem the same all the time?
If so, there are three simple steps that you can use to create better sex in your marriage.
Learn about them in this week’s episode.
Watch on YouTube here.
Summary:
-Take ownership of your own sexuality
-Anticipation is your friend
-Connect minds and bodies
-Focus on pleasure and connection instead of orgasm (especially if either of you has difficulty with orgasm)
Mike
P.S. If you are ready to take your life and marriage to greater joy and intimacy, I’d love to be your coach to help you get there. You can join us in The Strong Man System, or we can work together 1 on 1 (as an individual or as a couple). CLICK HERE to find out how.
P.S. Get the 7 Day Email Series: How To Be More Attractive To Your Wife at StrongMen.io
“Where your treasure is, there will your heart be also.” Matthew 6:21
What is most important to you?
You might say it’s God or your family…
But what do you spend the most time THINKING about?
When I looked closely, I didn’t like what I found.
I spent most of my time thinking about:
But, I found that I could CHOOSE where my treasure was.
And I decided to make that treasure my relationships with others.
I even created a Google Drive folder called “My Treasure” where I am keeping important information about the people in my life, and taking hours to really talk with them and fill out the “maps” of them.
These “maps” are going to be my treasure from here on out. And it feels great.
Watch on YouTube here.
Summary:
-Step 1: Find your treasure. What are you spending the most time thinking about?
-Step 2: Choose your treasure. What do you want to value most?
-Step 3: Spend time building up that treasure
Mike
P.S. If you are ready to take your life and marriage to greater joy and intimacy, I’d love to be your coach to help you get there. You can join us in The Strong Man System, or we can work together 1 on 1 (as an individual or as a couple). CLICK HERE to find out how.
P.S. Get the 7 Day Email Series: How To Be More Attractive To Your Wife at StrongMen.io
We are always manipulating the people around us.
We want something FROM them…
Or FOR them.
We want to “move” them into certain positions.
Emotional dependence on us or emotional resilience.
Sexual obligation or sexual choice.
Religious obligation or religious choice.
This week I got an in-depth view of how I manipulate my wife, kids and friends… and I didn’t like what I saw.
I took the time to INTENTIONALLY decide how I was going to try to move (manipulate) the people around me.
And the results are already SO much better.
Watch on YouTube here.
Summary:
-An outside perspective is INVALUABLE to finding your negative patterns
-Find your “old moves” and intentionally choose “new moves” for the important people in your life
-Use mapping as a way to more deeply understand and connect with the important people in your life
-The book Brain Talk by David Schnarch can help you through this process. You can get it on Amazon here.
Mike
P.S. If you are ready to create an incredibly intimate marriage… whether your wife is wanting to work on the marriage or not… come join us in The Strong Man System. You’ll have the best relationship you have EVER had with your wife… in 90 days or less… or you’ll get your investment back. Make today one of the best days of your life. CLICK HERE to join.
P.S. Get the 7 Day Email Series: How To Be More Attractive To Your Wife at StrongMen.io
If your answer is an immediate “my wife…” you might be missing something important.
At the end of the day, if you are relying on the opinion of others to tell you if you’re good enough…
You are on unstable ground.
The truth is that YOU get to decide:
Of course your wife can give you feedback on how you’re doing. And that feedback is extremely valuable as you are on your mission to become the best version of yourself.
The difference is, a strong man seeks that feedback as a way to improve himself.
A mosquito seeks that validation as a way to finally feel good about himself.
You don’t want to put your self-worth in your wife’s hands.
Especially if you’ve done something to lose her trust. Because she will be seeing the negative for a while.
YOU get to decide who you want to be.
AND whether you will live up to that or not.
Watch on YouTube here.
Mike
P.S. If you want to take your spiritual, mental, emotional and sexual strength to extraordinary levels...
and create an incredibly intimate marriage as a result...
Come join us in The Strong Man System.
If you do the work, you’ll feel stronger and more attractive than you EVER have. Guaranteed.
CLICK HERE for more details and make today one of the best days of your life.
P.S. Get the 7 Day Email Series: How To Be More Attractive To Your Wife at StrongMen.io
This title was hard for me to write.
Being a husband and father are two of the most important roles that I have as a man.
But, those roles are not ALL of who I am.
And, even if I do poorly in those roles...
Or walk away from them all together...
(Gulp)
I still have value.
This was a BIG breakthrough for me and I'd love to share it with you.
Watch on YouTube here.
Summary:
-God STILL cares about me (and you) even if I don't do a good job as a husband and father
-Even if I walk away completely from my family, God will STILL care for me and send people to help me
-This actually gives me MORE motivation and LESS pressure to be a good husband and father
Mike
P.S. Will today be the day YOU decide to build up your strength and create a stronger, more joyful, and more intimate marriage... no matter how bad (or good) it is right now? CLICK HERE to join The Strong Man System. And I'll see you inside.
P.S. Get the 7 Day Email Series: How To Be More Attractive To Your Wife at StrongMen.io
What are your New Year’s resolutions?
A better marriage?
To lose weight?
Make more money?
Stop a bad habit?
We’ll get into why these goals may NOT get you what you’re looking for…
And how to find an infinite source of power to achieve your goals.
Summary:
-WHY do you want to achieve your goals?
-If it’s because you think THERE is better than HERE… you’re heading for disappointment
-Instead, set goals from a place of LOVE for yourself and those around you… and SERVICE towards yourself and others
-This is an INFINITE source of strength and motivation for your goals… and will unleash your true potential
Mike
P.S. The Strong Man System is open NOW! If you’re ready to create the marriage and life that you’ve been waiting for, from a place of true acceptance of yourself, we’d love for you to join us. CLICK HERE to join now.
P.S. Get the 7 Day Email Series: How To Be More Attractive To Your Wife at StrongMen.io
Merry Christmas my friends!
Sometimes we forget that we're celebrating a birthday on Christmas... Jesus's birthday!
And, it's customary to give someone a gift on their birthday.
But what do you give the Man who LITERALLY has everything?
We'll talk about that today.
Watch on YouTube here.
Summary:
-As far as I can tell, Jesus mainly asked for one thing: If ye love me, keep my commandments (John 14:15)
-The 2 great commandments are “love God” and “love your neighbor as yourself” (Matthew 22:37-39)
-So, if we want to give Jesus a great gift, it will be a gift of loving God, ourselves, or others
-For me personally, I’ll be focusing on the gift of serving the people around me with joy instead of comparing and seeking the spotlight
-I’ll remember that the greatest among you shall be the servant (Matthew 23:11)
Mike
P.S. The Strong Man System opens up next week. I’m looking forward to having those who are ready join us in becoming stronger men, husbands, fathers and leaders in the world. See more details here.
P.S. Get the 7 Day Email Series: How To Be More Attractive To Your Wife at StrongMen.io
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