Sex With Emily

Latest Episodes:

Feeling Kinky? Try These Positions Jun 16, 2023

Show notes

How do you take a classic sex position and make it kinky? On today’s show, I’m telling you exactly how. Inspired by the positions chapter in Smart Sex (out now at bookstores everywhere), I’m talking through two specific positions that bring the kink – and another classic that you can spice up with a little power play. First, I’m looking at Cowgirl/Cowboy and talking through its pros, cons, and evolutions to introduce kinky dynamics. Next, I’m talking Doggy Style (or as I like to call it: Rear Entry) and breaking down its inherent kink dynamics and ideas to make it even more exciting. Finally, we’re looking at Missionary, which I think we can all agree needs a kinky rebrand. I’ll give you ideas to make it more surprising and sexy.

Show Notes:

How to Talk Like a Good Little Sub
ORDER MY NEW BOOK! Smart Sex: How to Boost Your Sex IQ and Own Your Pleasure
MEET ME ON TOUR! Sex With Emily Book Tour: SMART SEX Event Dates
TAKE THE SEX IQ QUIZ! Email proof of purchase to smartsex@sexwithemily.com and I’ll send you a link to take the quiz
LELO Soraya Wave (code SEXWITHEMILY for 25% off sitewide)
More Sex With Emily: Instagram | Twitter | Facebook | TikTok

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Answering Your Questions, Loveline-Style w/ Dr. Drew Jun 13, 2023

Show notes

Remember Loveline? The call-in show hosted by Dr. Drew to get your love and dating questions answered? Well, it holds a special place in my heart because I used to co-host it! So today, in celebration of my career leading up to my new book Smart Sex (out today!), I’m inviting my dear friend Dr. Drew Pinsky onto Sex With Emily to help me answer your sex questions Loveline-style. First, what does it mean when you feel like your long-distance partner is following you to your next city? Next, a college guy wants to know: how do you find real connection amid hookup culture? Or what about moving on from a toxic sexual relationship: how do you claim your own desires, now that you’re single? All this and more with me and Dr. Drew.

Show Notes:

How to Make a Mess: Squirting, Face Ejaculation & Golden Showers
Double the O, Double the Pleasure: How to Have Blended & Multiple Orgasms
ORDER MY NEW BOOK! Smart Sex: How to Boost Your Sex IQ and Own Your Pleasure
MEET ME ON TOUR! Sex With Emily Book Tour: SMART SEX Event Dates
TAKE THE SEX IQ QUIZ! Email proof of purchase to smartsex@sexwithemily.com and I’ll send you a link to take the quiz
Promescent.com/Emily (use this link to automatically save 15% at checkout)
More Dr. Drew: Website | Dr.Drew.tv | Twitter | Instagram
Opening Up
Open Monogamy: A Guide to Co-Creating Your Ideal Relationship Agreement
The Ethical Slut: A Guide to Infinite Sexual Possibilities
Open Deeply: A Guide to Building Conscious, Compassionate Open Relationships
Crazy on the Inside: A Memoir of Nobody Special
Polysecure: Attachment, Trauma and Consensual Non Monogamy
The Anxious Person’s Guide to Non-Monogamy: Your Guide to Open Relationships, Polyamory and Letting Go
More Than Two: A Practical Guide to Ethical Polyamory

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Up Your 69 Game (& Other Oral Sex Tips) Jun 09, 2023

Show notes

Let’s 69! It’s one of those sex acts where you tend to be a full-on lover or hater. But no matter what camp you fall in, chances are that if you’re having sex, you’re going to come across the famous, the controversial, 69 sex position. Why not learn some pointers to make the whole thing more hot, and more comfortable? First, I share research with you that might motivate you to put 69 on regular rotation in your sex life. Next, I give you techniques for being an excellent oral giver, and strategies like mindful masturbation, to help you become a more relaxed and erotic receiver. Finally, I talk position tips like the Sideways 69 and the Power 69 for you to play with, and take all your pressing questions on 69ing and oral sex.

Show Notes:

How to Make a Mess: Squirting, Face Ejaculation & Golden Showers
Double the O, Double the Pleasure: How to Have Blended & Multiple Orgasms
ORDER MY NEW BOOK! Smart Sex: How to Boost Your Sex IQ and Own Your Pleasure
MEET ME ON TOUR! Sex With Emily Book Tour: SMART SEX Event Dates
TAKE THE SEX IQ QUIZ! Email proof of pre-order purchase to smartsex@sexwithemily.com and I’ll send you a link to take the quiz
SMART SEX PRIZE PACK (submit your pre-order proof of purchase at the bottom of the page, be entered to win the prize pack and everyone that enters receives a copy of my new and improved Yes! No! Maybe? Guide)
VIIA Hemp Co’s High Love Libido Gummies (code EMILY for 15% sitewide + Free 2pc High Love THC Libido Gummy Sample Pack)
Playground Lube (code SEXWITHEMILY for 15% off your 1st order)
LELO SONA 2 Cruise (code SEXWITHEMILY for 25% off sitewide)
Episode: Best Of: Best Blowjob Ever
Episode: Best Of: Oral Sex Master Class

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Dating Younger Men, Canceling Threesomes: Emily Tells All Jun 06, 2023

Show notes

How did you discover who you were as a sexual being? Are you still figuring it out? Your desires, your sexual turn-ons, your overall attitude towards sex itself? Well, today, we’re doing something a little different: I’m answering all those questions and letting you in on my sexual journey. That’s right! I’ve got author, anthropologist, and my dear friend Dr. Wednesday Martin on the show today as we turn the tables and let her ask me how my career as a sex educator got started, the first time I had legitimately good sex, and how my relationship with sex has evolved. I also share the backstory behind this podcast, why I was so curious to launch a career in sex education in the first place, and how it's all led up to my book, Smart Sex. Listen in… it’s a juicy one.

Show Notes:

Your Guide to Mutual Masturbation
How to Train Your Vagina
ORDER MY NEW BOOK! Smart Sex: How to Boost Your Sex IQ and Own Your Pleasure
MEET ME ON TOUR! Sex With Emily Book Tour: SMART SEX Event Dates
TAKE THE SEX IQ QUIZ! Email proof of pre-order purchase to smartsex@sexwithemily.com and I’ll send you a link to take the quiz
SMART SEX PRIZE PACK (submit your pre-order proof of purchase at the bottom of the page, be entered to win the prize pack and everyone that enters receives a copy of my new and improved Yes! No! Maybe? Guide)
Promescent.com/Emily (use this link to automatically save 15% at checkout)
Untrue: Why Nearly Everything We Believe About Women, Lust, and Infidelity Is Wrong and How the New Science Can Set Us Free: Amazon | Barnes & Noble | Bookshop
More Dr. Wednesday Martin: Instagram | Twitter | Website

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Best Of: How to Squirt & Find Your G-Spot w/ Deborah Sundahl Jun 02, 2023

Show notes

Good news: every vulva owner can learn how to squirt. But it does take practice, and on today’s Best Of show, I’ve got sex educator, author, and female ejaculation expert Deborah Sundahl here to walk us through it. First, Deborah clarifies the connection between squirting and the G-spot, and just in case you have any doubts about the G-spot’s existence, Deborah tells you how to find yours in the mirror. Next, we clarify what female ejaculate is – hint, not pee – and how this fluid builds up in your body. We also talk about the difference between squirting and orgasm, and finally, we take your top questions on how to squirt with a partner. Yes: there are step-by-step tips! Because, as I always say, the wetter, the better.

Show Notes:

Your Guide to Mutual Masturbation
How to Train Your Vagina
ORDER MY NEW BOOK! Smart Sex: How to Boost Your Sex IQ and Own Your Pleasure
MEET ME ON TOUR! Sex With Emily Book Tour: SMART SEX Event Dates
TAKE THE SEX IQ QUIZ! Email proof of pre-order purchase to smartsex@sexwithemily.com and I’ll send you a link to take the quiz
SMART SEX PRIZE PACK (submit your pre-order proof of purchase at the bottom of the page, be entered to win the prize pack and everyone that enters receives a copy of my new and improved Yes! No! Maybe? Guide)
Playdrop Sex Mat (code EMILY10 for 10% OFF & a bonus play rag worth $25)
Female Ejaculation & The G-Spot
More Deborah Sundahl: Website

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Non-Penetrative Orgasms w/ Violet Benson May 30, 2023

Show notes

Violet Benson started her now-famous Instagram account @DaddyIssues_ while working through issues of her own. On today’s podcast, she opens up about working through deep emotional struggles so she can create the sex life and relationships that truly work for her. No matter your background or life stage, I’m positive this conversation will liberate and inspire you to take the next step in your sex life. Violet, who hosts the popular podcast Almost Adulting, tells me about her decision to temporarily swear off penetrative sex, freezing her eggs, and how she quit playing games while dating. She also takes the Sex IQ quiz inspired by my upcoming book, Smart Sex! Listen to her results, then listen to both of us answer a listener question: when the sex is hot but they’ve got huge, emotional red flags, should you pursue them anyway?

Show Notes:

Sexy Summer Pack List: The Seven Essentials
5 Reasons to Add Anal Play to Your Masturbation Routine
ORDER MY NEW BOOK! Smart Sex: How to Boost Your Sex IQ and Own Your Pleasure
MEET ME ON TOUR! Sex With Emily Book Tour: SMART SEX Event Dates
TAKE THE FULL SEX IQ QUIZ! Email proof of pre-order purchase to smartsex@sexwithemily.com and I’ll send you a link to take the quiz
SMART SEX PRIZE PACK (submit your pre-order proof of purchase at the bottom of the page, be entered to win the prize pack and everyone that enters receives a copy of my new and improved Yes! No! Maybe? Guide)
LELO LILY 3 (code SEXWITHEMILY for 25% off sitewide)
More Violet Benson: @daddyissues_ | Instagram
Almost Adulting Podcast: Apple Podcasts | Spotify

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Squirting Setbacks, Threesome Hangups & Other Sex Anxieties May 26, 2023

Show notes

We all have fears around sex, whether we’re aware of them or not. Maybe you’re worried someone’s not going to like your body, or that if you and your partner try something new, it’ll be awkward or weird. Maybe you’re worried you’ll never have sex with anyone ever again. I’m here to tell you this: your sexual anxieties are completely normal. Listen in as my callers and I work through theirs and develop actionable solutions to take the next step. When you’re a vulva owner, and something comes out when you orgasm, are you peeing or squirting? When preparing for a threesome, how can you get over the fear that your partner won't want sex with just you anymore? When the sex has fallen off entirely, how do you start initiating again? All this and more in today's sexual anxieties episode.

Show Notes:

Sexy Summer Pack List: The Seven Essentials
4 Penis Problems and 4 Ways to Solve Them
MEET ME ON TOUR! Sex With Emily Book Tour: SMART SEX Event Dates
PRE-ORDER MY NEW BOOK! Smart Sex: How to Boost Your Sex IQ and Own Your Pleasure
SMART SEX PRIZE PACK (submit your pre-order proof of purchase at the bottom of the page, be entered to win the prize pack and everyone that enters receives a copy of my new and improved Yes! No! Maybe? Guide)
VIIA Hemp Co’s Lowdose 2mg Delta 9 Microdosing Gummies (code EMILY for 15% sitewide + Free 2pc High Love THC Libido Gummy Sample Pack)

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Slut-Shaming & Self-Blaming w/ Elise Loehnen May 23, 2023

Show notes

Author Elise Loehnen has thought a lot about women and desire. In her new book On Our Best Behavior: The Seven Deadly Sins and the Price Women Pay to Be Good, she breaks down the cultural forces that teach women to be desirable rather than desiring, and the shame attached to a woman wanting something: whether it’s sex, success, or a damn slice of pizza. Whether it’s lust, and the way we encourage women to police others' sexuality, or sloth, and the way women are encouraged to be their husbands' caregivers, these invisible expectations serve none of us. Instead, Elise talks about ways we can liberate ourselves in ways that improve our sex lives and beyond: how to balance masculine and feminine energies in relationships, how to shed sexual shame, and so much more. As Elise says, “Our bodies are portals; lust is the invitation to enter.”

Please note that this episode includes discussions of sexual trauma. If you would like to skip these portions of the episode, please skip through:

19:35-25:13
41:36-43:03

Show Notes:

4 Penis Problems and 4 Ways to Solve Them
What’s a Sexual State of the Union & Why Should You Have One?
MEET ME ON TOUR! Sex With Emily Book Tour: SMART SEX Event Dates
PRE-ORDER MY NEW BOOK! Smart Sex: How to Boost Your Sex IQ and Own Your Pleasure
SMART SEX PRIZE PACK (submit your pre-order proof of purchase at the bottom of the page, be entered to win the prize pack and everyone that enters receives a copy of my new and improved Yes! No! Maybe? Guide)
Yarlap Kegel Exercise Kit & System (code EMILY for $35 off)
On Our Best Behavior: The Seven Deadly Sins and the Price Women Pay to Be Good: Amazon | Barnes & Noble | Bookshop
More Elise Loehnen: Podcast | Newsletter | Instagram | Website | TikTok

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Love Bombing, Breadcrumbing & Modern Dating May 19, 2023

Show notes

It can be difficult to meet new people and cultivate relationships, especially when looking for romantic partners. But don’t let that hold you back from trying: you might just need a new strategy. On today’s show, I take your calls on modern dating and how to solve the problems you’re running into. Let’s say you want to date an older woman but don’t have confidence in your communication - how do you improve your conversation game? When you’ve been single for years and fear rejection, how do you break out of romantic stagnation? Or what about breadcrumbing: when someone gives you just enough to keep you interested without outright ghosting you. How can you directly communicate without coming off as pushy? Finally, what are the signs of love bombing? One caller asks me if that’s what’s happening to her. Spoiler: yep.

Show Notes:

What’s a Sexual State of the Union & Why Should You Have One?
MEET ME ON TOUR! Sex With Emily Book Tour: SMART SEX Event Dates
PRE-ORDER MY NEW BOOK! Smart Sex: How to Boost Your Sex IQ and Own Your Pleasure
SMART SEX PRIZE PACK (submit your pre-order proof of purchase at the bottom of the page, be entered to win the prize pack and everyone that enters receives a copy of my new and improved Yes! No! Maybe? Guide)
Playground Lube (code SEXWITHEMILY for 15% off your 1st order)
Womaness.com/Emily (code EMILY for 20% off sitewide)

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Bondage, Threesomes & Golden Showers May 16, 2023

Show notes

All sexual fantasies have one thing in common: they trigger an arousal response inside our bodies, laced with erotic flavor. But how do you actualize your fantasy with a partner who’s wary of it? Even turned off by it? On today’s show, I’m taking your calls on this exact predicament. First up: when your partner wants you to drastically change your appearance for their pleasure, should you do it? Or when your partner wants to watch you with a third, how do you find that person? Next, if you’re not naturally dominant in bed, but your partner’s begging for it, how do you step into your power? I also get into urine fetishes (yep, like golden showers), how to introduce them to an otherwise vanilla sex life, and how to explore same-sex adventures in a hetero marriage.

Show Notes: