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    Saga Kraft

    Welcome to Saga Kraft.

    Myths, fairy tales, legends: Stories comfort us, inspire us, and heal us. Please join us as we share stories, both old and new.

    More than anything, we are open to the story and its unfolding. At times, it may be one story told by one person. At times, it’s the same story told through three different voices. In the end, we go were the story takes us . . . and we invite you to follow.

    We are:
    Sea, a writer artist and storyteller.
    Betsy, a medium and teacher of mystery traditions.
    Gabriela, an artist and practitioner of folk magic.
    We’re magical fairy godmothers in training.

    May our stories meet yours.

    Advertise

    Copyright: © Copyright 2020 Betsy Bergstrom, Gabriela Sarna, Sea Gabriel: Saga Kraft

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    Latest Episodes:
    Love Spells Feb 14, 2021
    Show notes

    Sea: Welcome to Saga Kraft: myths, fairytales, legends, stories comfort us, inspire us and heal us. Please join us as we share stories both old and new. More than anything, we are open to the story and it's unfolding. At times it may be one story told by one person, at times it's the same story told through three different voices. In the end, we go where the story takes us and we invite you to follow. I'm Sea, a writer, artist, and storyteller.Betsy: I'm Betsy, a medium and teacher of mystery traditions. Gabriela: I'm Gabriella, an artist and practitioner of folk magic. Saga Kraft: We are magical fairy godmothers in training. . Gabriela: Today's stories will be about wanting love, longing for love, having love, losing love, and everything in between. And of course, about magic. We hope you enjoy them. Sea, we would love to hear your story. Sea: "I don't care!" I yelled down to my mom who asked what I wanted for breakfast.What I really wanted was to know if Abbey like liked me. I so wanted to kiss the beautiful full lips. We had been hanging out for about a year and we'd gone to the food truck together a couple of days ago. She wouldn't finish her stir fry because it touched by pork bun, but we had fun after we switched from a low budget sci-fi to a superhero movie anyway. But I was still afraid to ask her out, and she was starting to kind of like some other loser. It was time for me to make my move. My sister said I should ask her witchy friend Claire. I've known Claire since third grade and figured, at worst, I'd get a laugh out of it. My sister called her and then said it was really important that I show respect. Claire had a gift and couldn't give up her homework time to talk to an unbeliever. I should be there at three forty five with a gift for her. She suggested a bunch of shells I had on my window. So, Claire's mom answered the door, double taking because she forgot to put on the new-agey scarf she promised Claire she'd wear. She quickly pulled it around her head and bowed then offered me a cookie on the way to Claire's room. She knocked three times before opening the door and bowing. The place was a sea of loud fabric. Claire was on her bed, cross-legged in the middle of a jungle of curtains. I was overwhelmed by the colors and the incense. It felt like an herb garden went gaseous and flowed into my sinuses. Thank God I had my inhaler. After a whiff. I sat down where Claire's mom pointed, on a round pillow on the floor at the foot of the bed. There was a three inch string hanging from the blanket. Claire's mom left, closing the door behind her. Claire sat on the bed, not looking down on me. She had her eyes closed and hands together like a small child praying, but in front of her chest. She was fuller than I remembered. I nibbled the cookie.When I'd eaten the whole thing, one crumb at a time, I cleared my throat and she whipped one finger up in a wait sign. I sighed and started pulling at the dangling thread as she dropped her hands. An eternity later the string was about twelve yards long, and Claire startled me when she spoke in an unaturally deep tone that made her voice crack. "You have come for a spell.""Uuuh," I responded.She deployed her silencing finger. "It is a love spell. What is the name of your beloved?" she asked, dropping her hand to her lap. "Abbey." I frowned. I live in fairfield, not fairy tale."Yes," she announced abruptly "you shall have it. Although," she continued "your guides want you to know that you, too, wield the power of altering destiny.Great, I thought, I had been approved to make choices. I considered altering destiny right then and there by getting up and leaving. But I'd never hear the end of it from my sister."Abbey." she announced, squeezing her eyes shut and beginning to mutter under her breath. She held her hands like she was spinning an invisible soccer ball .Just then, Claire's mom snuck in, winked, and silently passed me another cookie before leaving again. I wondered if she'd been listening at the door. Claire got quieter and quieter until only her lips were moving, then she stood up making the bed bounce. She threw her arms wide, smacking the curtains. "You are bound by love." she pronounced. "So," I asked "that means she'll go out with me?" Claire opened her eyes and glared down at me. "Well, she will now. Put your gift on the altar and tell your friends good stuff about me."She pointed to the top of her radiator where a stone box and plate with half a cookie sat balanced in front of a wall hanging of a goddess. I crawled over and pulled the shells from my pocket. They would have fallen off the radiator, so I put them on the plate then crawled back to the foot of the bed.Claire stared at me serenely for a minute before saying "We are done."On the way out her mom thanked me and gave me another cookie. Just then Abbey called. She wanted to do something. I needed to balance out my sugar rush, so I thought we could get burritos for dinner. I got there first and ordered our usual, a chili Verde with extra sour cream for me and a vegan with black beans for her. I took the overflowing plates to a table by the front window. When she got there and she squeed. She ran up and hugged my arm. She never hugs my arm. She only hugged all of me before, and that was only when something really great or super sad happened. She didn't let go. She just kept clinging to my arm. I had to take her hand and put it on the table before her nails drew blood. And then she was in my face. She even spit a little when she told me excitedly between blinks and giggles about her day, and the night before, and the day before that. And she just kept touching me. Petting my shoulder, holding my hand even when it was covered with meaty burrito juice.After dinner, she really wanted to go to a movie so I asked if she wanted to come over and watch a low budget scifi, and she did! She even put on lipstick when she was in the bathroom. Her full lips were shining out at me like a beacon. It felt awesome. And she was doing exactly what I would want her to do, but I had a weird, awkward feeling. Still, it was great.We turned on a movie and sat on the couch. For the first time ever, she sat close. Her thigh was touching mine. It was warmed and soft. It didn't really see the movie at all. There was her thigh, and her arm which brushed up against mine, skin on skin every time she reached for her juice. And her breasts were close, really close, just inches away.Halfway through I got up to make popcorn just to cool down. Then, when we started again, she fully cuddled. She was so sexy, so warm, so exciting. And just as the film ended, she reached up and pulled me down. I came closer and closer to her beautiful full lips until she kissed me, softly at first, and then with a desperate chaos that felt like it was drawing the life out of me."Well, I said, jumping up "thanks for coming over." She looked at me like I had just killed her puppy. I sat back down and took her hands. "I like like you." I said "I really like like you. There is no one I can imagine like liking as much as you, but I think we should go on a real date. Could we go to a movie tomorrow.?""Sure." she said, happy but confused, "Okay." she followed up as the confusion stepped aside. I walked her home and we had the best hug anyone has ever had. I headed back feeling proud of my choice to not sort of rape her. My choice to not sort of rape her, I thought. What did Claire say? Something about me wielding the power of destiny?When I got home I tried searching the internet, but for what? Not love spells, not hate spells, not even anti love spells. Finally I plugged in "possible love but only with freewill" spells, but I only found new spells, or spells that broke relationships. Eventually I looked up how to write spells.I haven't slept yet, and I need to leave for school again in an hour, but I am finally ready. I'll have to cut class this afternoon to take a nap so I can make it to the movie later, but I'm really happy that we have a date and I've lit a birthday candle. So here it goes: "All of my love is wielded by me,and your love by you. I set us both free. We make our own choices. We still may succeed. All bindings be gone. So mote it be. I stomped my foot to end it. It just seemed like the right thing to do. I'm surprised that I really think this will fix stuff, but I do. Still, the box says that my tiny fire will take twenty minutes to burn out, and it's not like I have a miniature sconce. "Diann, what do you want for breakfast?" my mom calls from the kitchen"Oatmeal!" I shout down "Lots of it, thick enough to hold up a candle!"Betsy: I really liked it. I liked the conscience that was there too. What do you think sparked that?Sea: In my mind this is a teenage boy, it doesn't have to be, and it was also really weird that I felt like I was writing from the perspective of a teenage boy as I have not been one, but he was actually a pretty mature teenage boy. Internally, not externally.Gabriela: I really enjoyed the story, and I especially enjoyed the point of view from which it was written. It felt very, very real to me, and from what I remember of teenage boys, just that kind of excitement and also one sidedness when it came to a girl they like. Though, I feel like that is across genders in terms of teenagers. That is what happens on the hormonal level, on the emotional level. When you like someone, you like them so much that that is all you think about. They are threaded through everything in your day and night, and that was certainly clear here. But I also love that he, though, really appreciated being liked, had a feeling that something was not exactly as it should be.Betsy: I liked the witch, too. Sea: Yes, I did too. And I loved her mom, honestly. I loved her mom supporting her.Gabriela: Like a mom of a teenage model or child actor, playing her part.Yeah. Really what I love about that entire moment and the house is, setting the stage for magic or certain kinds of magic to take form or take space, or place rather. Certain conditions have to be met, and I like how those conditions were present in this story. And without those conditions, the spell wouldn't work. Betsy: And not just the conditions, but the, the boy's submitting to those conditions, too. Gabriela: What he was willing to do for love, or like like at least.Sea: Right, yeah. Gabriela: I also loved the reality of, during teenage years, how everybody's really involved, not just in the couples life once they're together, but before it even happens. There are so many moving stories, and possibilities, and your friend telling you, Oh yeah he totally likes you, I have no doubt about it. And you going forward and doing something stupid based on that information, which was a lie. Maybe I'm speaking from experience. Anyway, this whole story really brought up so many of those memories for me, it made me smile the whole time.Sea: So, shall we move on? To Gabriela's fabulous story this evening?Gabriela: Yes, we can move on. I really enjoyed your story. Mine is a little different, but maybe not, and it is called The Fox Wife. The day Kyoko's wedding was the happiest of her life. It was springtime. The cherry blossoms were blooming filling the air with the promise of sweetness Kyoko's wedding Komono was made of exquisite silk with painted sakura branches. It was the most beautiful and expensive piece of clothing she had ever owned. Shinji, her beloved, was a simple but hardworking and kind man. Most importantly, he adored Kyoko and was deeply devoted to her. The way he looked at her that day made her feel like the most beautiful woman in all of Japan. Even though Kyoko's family didn't entirely approved of the couple's engagement, over time they saw that the two were very much in love and allowed the union.People talked about the strange weather during the ceremony, for, even though it was sunny, it rained a little. Fox weather, they whispered, exchanging meaningful looks. But Kyoko didn't mind. She thought it was a magical and auspicious occurrence, a blessing for her and Shinji's lives together. The first few years of their marriage were very happy. Shinji got a job at a factory in town, and Kyoko sewed beautiful dolls from old kimonos to make a little extra money to save and have when they would be able to grow their family. Many years passed in this way and the couple built their lives together, but no children blessed their home. Disappointment and sadness slowly crept into their hearts, changing them and changing the love between them. For Kyoko it was mostly sadness that filled her, as she so longed to have children. Shinji's heart, however, grew bitter and cold, and every time he looked at Kyoko he saw her sorrow and couldn't help but blame himself for her unhappiness. He grew colder and more distanced towards his wife, and with time, cruel even.The man Kyoko married years ago was no longer recognizable to her, and this broke her heart more than anything else. He never even looked at her anymore. The day of their wedding, when his eyes were so full of admiration for her, seemed like a long gone dream of the past. Shinji spent more and more time away from home, drinking and gambling, spending what little money they had on his addictions. He even started to visit the beds of other women, those he would meet on his night adventures away from his wife. The only time he came home was to take what few items they had of value left to sell. Kyoko worked days, and sometimes long nights, sewing dolls she could sell at the market so she could buy food. She dreaded the times when Shinji would come home, for he yelled and swore at her as she tried to keep away from him the remaining of their household belongings. The last thing Shinji could sell was Kyoko's wedding kimono, which was her most prized possession. She hugged the fabric to herself, trying to protect it from his greedy grasp, but Shinji pulled and pulled so hard that she fell backwards against the wall and watched him storm out of the house with the fabric. Hot tears ran down her face and a bitter angry fire burned insider. She wished she had never met Shinji. She wished they never married. She wished that she would never have to see him again so she could forget him and the unhappiness he brought her.The next day, Kyoko headed for the market to sell more dolls she had made, hoping she would find more buyers than the day before. It was a long walk through the woods that led to town, and heavy snow had begun to fall, as it was a brisk winter day. She saw that a figure watched her from a few paces away. Due to the thick falling snow, she couldn't really make out who the figure was. All she could see was the color of cream, orange, and hints of red in the distance, human shaped. As she got closer she found that the snow blurred what she was seeing, for who she came upon was an old crouched woman, cloaked and a thick brown shawl, a piece of long silver white hair danced around the woman's small wrinkled face, while her black almond shaped eyes observed Kyoko curiously."What is it that you carry?" the old woman asked, and Kyoko, who assumed she was referring to her basket, revealed what had held."Dolls for sale. I hope I sell more today than yesterday." Kyoko said with a deep sigh. "That is not what I mean." the old woman replied, "what burdens do you carry? They must be heavy for I can feel their pull darken these woods.…

    Full show notes at the publisher

    Tomtes Pt. 1 Feb 10, 2021
    Show notes

    Sea: Welcome to Saga Kraft. Myths, fairytales, legends, stories comfort us, inspire us and heal us. Please join us as we share stories both old and new. More than anything, we are open to the story and it's unfolding. At times it may be one story told by one person. At times it's the same story told through three different voices. In the end we go where the story takes us, and we invite you to follow.

    I'm Sea, a writer, artist, and storyteller.

    Betsy: I'm Betsy, a medium and teacher of mystery traditions.

    Gabriela: I'm Gabriela, an artist and practitioner of folk magic.


    Saga Kraft: We are magical in training.


    Imbolc Feb 03, 2021
    Show notes

    Sea: Welcome to Saga Kraft. Myths, fairytales, legends, stories comfort us, inspire us and heal us. Please join us as we share stories both old and new. More than anything, we are open to the story and it's unfolding. At times it may be one story told by one person. At times it's the same story told through three different voices. In the end we go where the story takes us, and we invite you to follow.

    I'm Sea, a writer, artist, and storyteller.

    Betsy: I'm Betsy, a medium and teacher of mystery traditions.

    Gabriela: I'm Gabriela, an artist and practitioner of folk magic.


    Saga Kraft: We are magical in training.


    Initiations Jan 26, 2021
    Show notes

    Sea: Welcome to Saga Kraft. Myths, fairytales, legends, stories comfort us, inspire us and heal us. Please join us as we share stories both old and new. More than anything, we are open to the story and it's unfolding. At times it may be one story told by one person. At times it's the same story told through three different voices. In the end we go where the story takes us, and we invite you to follow. I'm Sea, a writer, artist, and storyteller. Betsy: I'm Betsy, a medium and teacher of mystery traditions. Gabriela: I'm Gabriela, an artist and practitioner of folk magic.Saga Kraft: We are magical in training. Gabriela: The stories that we are about to share with you today contain some intense descriptions and material, so, if you are feeling in any way sensitive, perhaps this may not be the stories to listen to at this time.Today, we are excited to share stories about initiation, and the forms they take. How they change us and our world. And we invite the blessing of Saga, the blessing of Story, and the blessing of change at the right time, and especially the blessing of a graceful change whenever possible.Betsy: I also want to honor the listener, because what is a story without a listener, and so, may our stories in this new season land with you in a way that interests you or amazes you, or intrigues you, or challenge you. Sea: And I also want to honor saga and all the helpers.Betsy: And I'd love to begin if that's all right with you two.Gabriela: That would be lovely, thank you Betsy. Betsy: So, my story is called Morvoren.The sea has always held mysteries and treasure. Though ocean and coastal currents may be habitual, how things move about in the sea and where they ended up cannot always be explained. Water carries emotion and sound. It can imprint with experience and intention. It's always subject to magic. I've always trusted the goddess Sirona, and that's why I'm now floating in the sea, nailed into a barrel, being carried away by the outgoing tide Goello, my betrayer, was watching me with beetled brows and smiling in an odious way as his men nailed me into the barrel with just enough of an opening for the sea to enter. Now his ship sails away from me. I suppose I should feel the shame that has been heaped onto me, but I'm furious. Not at the goddess, after all, she said I would be facing trials, but at my parents for being swayed by my betrothed to cast me off. Casting me off was their idea. He wanted me stoned. As if the stones of Brittany would even allow that. Instead I'm floating away in what everyone hopes will be the end of me. I am resolved to live.I don't quite know how that's going to happen, but I will not let them kill me and my baby. Time was, not so long ago, that my decision to consummate my love with Grannus would have been celebrated with a feast and gifts, not worries about what a foreign god would think about it. It's a confusing time when priests of the new god are trying to diminish the goddess and her place in my country. Confusing because my parents have to consider this god, because almost no country will trade with us while we are considered pagans. They planned on my marriage to a christian princeling Goello. I've always known marriage was my duty, but never to him. Sirona intervened. She merged my path with a man who was made for me as though he was my other half. Grannus of the black hair and white skin, whose breadth of shoulder is matched by the vastness of his heart. He's now locked away and won't be freed until I've been swept away. I hope he is praying and not despairing, for I need his prayers. Serona of the waters, send me a rescuer. Please deliver me from the ocean. Two days have passed and I've been becalmed in unseasonable heat. I feel I'm going nowhere, but still a current carries me far from land. Is this a reprieve from death? Or am I in the vestibule of death even now, and don't know? I dream of Grannus and how in his arms, Sirona's voice came into my head with light and love, saying through me to Grannus: my love, my heart, my husband. In that moment I melted into love, but now hungry, thirsting, and bobbing in a reaking barrel, I wonder what came over me. No. I cannot allow myself to think like this. Sirona, as your waters meet the sea, may it send prayers to the sea god to help me. The ocean swells are growing bigger and the sky darkens. My barrel, which I've named Indomitable, is tossed about.My prayer is now a plea straight from my soul, without words. I dose, too wretched to think or feel. There's a blinding light in the darkness. The voice of Sirona saying "Trust.", and soon, as if in a dream, I'm aware of slim white arms reaching through into the darkness where I sit huddled, and a soft and melodic voice saying "It's a lady in here." The arms withdraw, and then there's a sensation of the barrel steadying. I am somehow no longer at the mercy of the waves, bearing steadily in some direction. I sleep, and wake to this heavenly sound of voices singing. These voices sang of the beauty of the sea, of treasure, of love. Sometimes they sang in a language I've never heard, but will always long for. The voices are pure, melodic, eerie.I think we traveled like this for hours, maybe days. A cup of water was passed to me, and the most delicious fish. I ate and drank and slept again. The barrel was pushed onto land and strong arms lever the lid off. The male faces disappeared and a lovely female face, haloed with blonde hair and twined with pearls, peeked over the edge of the barrel."We've brought you to Cornwall in Pendour Bay. Ahead is Zennor village. You and your baby will be safe here. We've put you into the hands of a trusted friend. Here, these are for any need you have." A necklace of priceless pearls was put into my hand. The trusted friend and his wife came and freed me from my barrel and took me to their home where they cared for me. The local priest came to me to discover more about my story, and all I could do is rave about the light around the golden head, the voice, the white arms. And before I knew it, I was declared a christian miracle. Saint Senara, saved for some purpose by an angel. It was most disconcerting, but I accepted it, for what else could I do? I sought Sirona's advice. In the village was one of the old stone monuments and a sacred well. There, Sirona and I spoke. "Trust." she said again. I was witnessed glowing with her light and trying to sing those enchanting songs that were sung to me while in my barrel. I cannot stop trying to sing them. I know they were full of love and protection, and that is what I imbue my songs with, though I can never quite get the melody right. Eventually word came to this village of the princess who was cast to her death in a barrel across the sea. Here, where I was washed ashore, in this most christian village of Zennor, I regained my status and eventually my love. Grannus found me. I was duly baptized, along with my son Budock and my husband, into the celtic church.I used my pearls to build a small castle and a church, which took my name later. I built a few more churches nearby, which were also dedicated to St. Senara, but to me, they were to Sirona. Here I lived out my life. Part TwoThe humans have no idea how strongly sound carries underwater. When I became of an age to have my own household, I looked around my family's domain of the Irish sea and the North Atlantic coastal region. I was always attracted to the sunken village Lyoness, with its great bells, but I settled on the nearby bay of Pendour in Cornwall. There used to be a princess, partly fairy but sadly mortal, who's singing lured me to build my home in the bay off shore, that I might hear her voice for as many years as she would be able to sing her spell songs. Her life passed and the castle felt to ruin, but the bay continued to be a home for me. When L. my father or M. my brother chided me about my choice, with a whole ocean open to me, I remain steadfast. But now for another reason. I stayed in my home in Pendour because I took up where the princess left off.Her songs were meant to support the lives of those who lived in her lands. She did not know that her domain was actually mine. No matter, I found myself inspired by her concern and have kept to her decision to infuse this region with magic for the betterment of all. The songs of the long dead princess were intended to foster protection, generosity, goodwill, and good behavior. I understand she had suffered from bad behavior. Easy enough to continue in that way. And so on many a night, I'm am to be heard singing my own songs. I've traveled up and down the coast, and I'm quite sure of the difference between a protected cove and one unprotected. You've only to hear the harsh words and the sounds of beatings and sobs of humans who are left to their own tendencies. Bear in mind, these are smuggler's waters, were French brandy comes to shore, stripping away any semblance of good intentions. It's said that not only is Pendour Cove and the village of Zennor home to good people, but also to the sweetest singers. I expect they learned to sing from me, singing for generations near them., but perhaps it's also a side effect of the spells of the princess saint. In any case, one villager surpasses them all. This lad can be heard singing in the church of an evening after a long day's work. I'm mesmerized by his voice and his heart, which can be heard as he sings his hymns. I can hear him less well when he sings at his chores, but it's the sweetest sound nonetheless. I'm not sure when the idea came to me, but once it did it stayed until I began to transform myself to human girl and slip into the back of the church of Saint Senara on most evenings to see him, as well as hear him up close. The old ladies of the village saw me right off, for I am inhumanly lovely and quite well dressed.I knew I was taking a risk showing up like this, but my village people are good people and I don't fear them. I didn't reckon their curiosity, for apparently young well dressed women don't simply go where they want to. Oh well. I also didn't reckon on seeing a lad whose personal beauty matched that of his almost unearthly voice. I made a stir with my own voice as well, so much so that he eventually came to meet me, though I forestalled him on this because I made it a habit to slip away first thing. I came back year after year, until he was a fine man. One day my longing to see him even closer, made me a little slow and he caught up with me. I gave him the gift of my name, M.M. He was not to know what a gift it was for quite some time. His name is Matthew Penwalla. Masquerading as humans slowed things down for us, but added spice to it. After all, I do have more time than he does.After spending many hours together, it was clear that it was love. The villagers saw us together, deeply engrossed in one another. He was warned that nothing good could come of being with a woman who never ages. He didn't fear it. Time came when he left the land and entered the sea with me. I let his people know he was not drowned, but alive with me and our children.When a ship anchored in front of the door to my home, I surfaced and stood on the water and called out to the ship captain" Kind, sir, please lift your anchor and move. I can not get home to my husband, Matthew Penwalla, with your anchor in front of my door, please, my children are hungry and I must feed them."I made sure that his people on land prospered. If ever danger came to this coast, together we would ring warning bells in the under sea church of drowned Lyonesse. Gabriela: Thank you for that. I'm really moved by the songs, and the power of song in these stories, both of them. And really there are so many things here to nibble beautifully. They were both so wonderfully written and so rich. I think what strikes me more than anything is the beauty of magic and the beauty of hope. Especially in the first story, since I really connected with the princess and her gnosis, her awareness, and her commitment to life more than anything. That she was so committed to life that no matter what happened, she would be found. And she was. It was absolutely lovely. Both stories were absolutely lovely. Betsy: Thank you. Sea: Yes, they were very beautiful, and I love all the details and the richness. And the bells. I love the bells, and of course the water. And I have to admit that simultaneously, that I was so pulled into them. Like I felt like I was just in the story itself and swept away with the tide of the story. And so it was quite beautiful. And I wasn't following the structure as much as I was following the feeling. Does that make sense? So, I felt completely, not consumed by, but as if I was floating in it, which is a very, very beautiful thing for me. Thank you. Betsy: Well, thank you. Gabriela: I absolutely have to agree with Sea. The first one for me, especially, had the swept away feeling. I felt so swept away by it and really in it, in it in every aspect, every detail and, yeah, I'm still in it. I'm quite taken by all the magic of it and the water. Love the water. Betsy: Thank you. For myself, I was just struck how one story initiated another story. And it gave me a different perspective on initiation than I previously had. So, for that I'm super grateful. Sea: I mean this in the nicest way, so this is a good thing, I feel I have to say up front, but I felt like I was seeing two aspects or two perspectives on initiation that on one hand filled me with a sense of wonder and power, and on the other hand made me feel a little bit cross-eyed because I was trying to hold two visions as one. So, the feeling of it was very complete and very whole and very beautiful, and simultaneously the details became, not irrelevant... because they were so beautiful, so they were contributing to my lived experience, but they were not static or concrete in the way that details in a story usually are for me, because they were more contributing to my holistic experience, which held the two. I am one who loves to be lost in things and I often can't get into things in the way that I wish I could, and so I felt completely held by this double vision.Gabriela: I feel that that's the power of the story, and the power of initiation. That we really don't know what's happening, sometimes for a long time. And the parallel and the connection, and even the changing of front or the changing of name, of this becomes that. The power of a place or the power of something, or someone, doesn't disappear, but can be absorbed into something else. And sometimes it's unknown what the underlying light or power is, but it remains and it's sustainable and it's eternal. So that's how I felt. Both these stories held that. They fed each other. One came from another, or maybe not. It was this eternal binding, this eternal flow, this eternal truth of something beautiful that would carry you forever. Did you enjoy these stories, Betsy? Did you enjoy being with these beautiful magical beings?Betsy: Oh yes. They felt so different and yet they felt so entwined together too. I was really quite taken with the princess saints and, and just that single word from her goddess of "trust" and just go with it. Now she's a christian miracle and a christian saint in her lifetimeGabriela: Which really did happen. Betsy: And which apparently really did happen to her too. Yeah. I loved her discipline in her trust, also. Of how the mind can wander in a direction, but her discipline kept bringing it back. And that, especially that place she was in of praying with…

    Full show notes at the publisher

    Dragons Jan 20, 2021
    Show notes

    Sea: Welcome to Saga Kraft. Myths, fairytales, legends, stories comfort us, inspire us, and heal us. Please join us as we share stories both old and new. More than anything, we are open to the story and it's unfolding. At times it may be one story told by one person, at times it's the same story told through three different voices. In the end, we go where the story takes us, and we invite you to follow. I'm Sea, a writer, artist, and storyteller. Betsy: I'm Betsy, a medium and teacher of mystery traditions. Gabriela: I'm Gabriella, an artist and practitioner of folk magic. Saga Kraft: We are magical berries in training.Sea: Welcome to the world of dragons. Betsy: My story is the dragon of Provence. Different worlds were created at the same time by the creator. No one world was more important or better than another. These worlds were not nesting one within another like Russian dolls, but were each equal to one another with one right next to the other. Between worlds were thin places where inhabitants from one world might find their way to cross through and enter another world, for their own reasons. There are many reasons to cross and all are dependent on what sort of person is entering into another world. This state of affairs was not obvious to most inhabitants of the worlds. These inhabitants were in pursuit of their daily life, trying to make a living and succeeding at it, or not. Where once they may have lived in smaller groups or bands, over time each prominent species found their way, whether it was to live in a town or a city, or to become a single hunter. Drak the Hunter was a sorcerer dragon in the dragon world, who considered himself to be at the top of the top. He had lived a very long time and realized that, though he never really needed to fear any greater predator because there wasn't one, his chief and only enemy was boredom. At first he became a collector, as dragons are prone to do, and then he developed into a philosopher. Philosophy became his chief pursuit and he delved into the mysteries of every world he could enter, and they were many. He learned many languages and hoarded rare texts and artifacts. Without realizing it, he became a bit of an intellectual aesthete. It may have transmitted to him partially through osmosis., because the thin place that allowed him to enter the human realm was located in a very beautiful part of France. Here, castles abounded, built on top of mountains and the Rhône river flowed fast and deep.He found a cave under the river in the bottom of a mountain valley, and here he learned this river was the home of sorceress water fairies who claimed alliance with him and who felt themselves to be immune from his hunting. They convinced him that they were not to be eaten. He respected their wishes, not because their logic compelled him, but because they were the closest thing to being interesting that he had found for a long while. He focused on hunting humans who were alone, and for more pleasure, he hunted in the marketplaces of various towns, where he concealed himself in visibility and waited for a strange child or a man relieving himself in an alley after a big meal and a lot of ale.He had something of a soft spot for human women. In this region, the fairies made many amorous conquest, and he did not want to eat a hybrid fairy and human woman. When it was necessary from time to time to consort with his own kind, a mercifully rare event, he found himself becoming quickly irritated and desiring retreat. Not in defeat, but because of boredom. Over time he could think of no great reason to connect with another dragon because they were so tedious.He lived this way for a long while growing, ever more precise and opinionated. In the spring of his world and those closest to his, a longing grew in him that was so unexpected. It made no sense to him for quite some time. Eventually the thought came to him in full clarity. I want a child now.To sire offspring required consorting with a lady dragon. Like any well set up intellectual bachelor, he began to make lists of the dragon Queens. He knew, and of their principle characteristics, which might be passed to their offspring. With this unromantic list in hand, he narrowed his choices and began his round of investigation designed as courtship. The Balkan queen was rejected for her extremely robust, but very dark, humor. The English queen seemed very dull and without conversation. The Danish queen was too recently widowed to be interested. The Scottish queen was strong and fiery and steeped in Highland magic. He chose her. She let him know that she had her own domain and would not be joining him in his, though a visit in a great while might be possible. He agreed, with relief and together they waited until the autumn to join each other and to mate.Two eggs came from this union. One was taken back to Scotland by the queen. He took his egg to his cave under the river Rhône, where he would be a brood father, close to good hunting. Months passed in this way. The dragon, Drak, studied, hunted, and meditated on what his offspring would be like. He hoped that it would have the invisibility powers that were part of his magical traits. The Highland magic was yet a mystery in how it would manifest. In due course the egg showed signs that hatching time was near. Drak began a different kind of hunt. He went invisible and watched in the marketplace of the sunny village of B????. He saw a few women that met his needs. He stalked them all. One felt his presence and was very afraid. Another felt him nearby but, though she looked over her shoulder, she did not scuttle home like the others. He decided on her. He drank in her scent so that he could find her anywhere and watch, waiting for his moment. It came. She went to the river to wash clothes on the banks of the fast running Rhône. Her new baby, a tast, looking morsel, was in a basket on the bank, well away from the water's edge. Unseen, Drak was in the water, and he held a golden goblet glinting with gems, just out of her reach. The water fairies watched with interest. The bank was steep and a little treacherous. She reached out towards the shining cup. It seemed to move a little farther away. She braced herself and stretched her arm even farther and overbalanced and went right into the water. Her last image in her mind before she fainted in fright was of her crying baby and the family's clothes left on the river bank. The Rhône engulfed her. She woke to find herself dripping wet and in a crystal cave, with a pair of large emerald eyes watching her. Shuddering and fright, she saw they belonged to an enormous scaly bronze colored dragon. The glimmering cup was there between them. Her panic increased, and she nearly fainted again. A palpable energy emanated from those emerald eyes and she found her panic subsiding. She watched as her memories of her family, her sun splashed village, and her whitewashed house began to fade and disappear like scattered dreams in the light of dawn. She heard the voice of Drak in her head, humming and soothing her. He just turned to an egg, enthroned on a pile of velvet cushions. His humming song, his emerald eyes, and the glinting watery light of the crystal cave all were lulling her into a sense of calmness, and somehow of purpose. He wove the emotions and love that he found within her for her baby, and drew them to the egg with his intentions. With his voice and eyes and the heat spiraling from his body he wove a spell that touched her heart and mind and bound her to the egg.,the leathery looking oblong egg, which was rocking back and forth, back and forth, hatching. When the little and fragile dragon emerged from the broken shell, Drak felt the most enormous love. The dragonling was iridescent and mewling. Drak gestured to the woman and she obeyed his unspoken command to pick up and cuddle the dragon. The voice of the dragonling had its own power over her. She bared her breast and began to nurse her new child.Gabriela: Betsy, that was absolutely lovely. Thank you so much.Sea: Yeah, that was very fun. Betsy: Thank you. A very well-known dragon in his region of Provence. Sometimes shows up as a female. Gabriela: See, would you like to share your story? Your dragon story?Sea: Sure, thank you. I just really need to pee. I'm curled up, guarding my hoard for nigh on to an eon without a scheduled potty break. Gerdy, my compliment, is held up on the other side. Some liminals are exhibiting bad behavior in an attempt to protest the passing of time, just as some carnates are protesting the agreements that deter them from tearing down our magical forest to build a community of mud houses.I know she'll be here as soon as she can, but I am getting a little anxious. It's several miles to the protected glacier nearby. Exhibitionism is not my thing, as it were. I usually enjoy my incarnate shifts, after all I just lay about and watch for requesters then administer the appropriate tests. Are they courageous? Are they cunning? Are they chivalrous? Then I set up a scenario in which their failings are teachings, and they get another chance, up to a point.Some succeed and are called heroes. A few, as few as I can manage, need a little bit more time. They're called bad examples, a kind of martyr, if you will. After their failed tests, they go through a magical initiation process, much like an enchanted version of your baptism, and spend a millennia or so in a liminal form, taking on challenges and lessons to ensure their successful completion of the questing process.It was not permanent of course. Nothing is,hence all the protesting. Eventually the initiates are returned to their current forms, though, by that time they find themselves many generations further up the branches of their family trees. So here I am, legs crossed thinking dry thoughts and hoping for a swift, peaceful resolution on the other side. I'm asking the wind to let Gerdy know that I'd really like to see her sooner rather than later, when the knight comes crashing through the trees. He is wearing silver armor and jewels and stands with a dignity he could not possibly have earned. He thinks he's here to prove something. I know he's here to learn something. No one approaches like this and goes away the same. He leaps from his horse, loosens his spear, and charges at me without so much as a hello. Clearly, he is an eldest son, and I am in no mood. I don't want to get up until I can make it to the glacier. So I tightened my thighs and bat him away with my wings, sending him flying into his horse.This is intentional. Horses are soft compared to rocks and trees, which are his other options. The horse turns to offer a soft belly, then neighs. The knight bounces to a stop before leaping up and charging at me again. I find the faster they charg, the slower they learn. I spit a little well-named fire at him, just enough to melt the sword and scorched the beautiful sheen off his armor. I'm hoping it will distract him and he'll spend a moment or two buffing it out, but no. He attempts to bellow "Die, you beast!" Even he knows the effect is lessened by his coughing as he fans away the smoke. He puffs himself up to almost a sisteenth of my size and strikes a dramatic pose. I look around searching for a beast."Me?" I asked pointedly, trying to feign my usual easygoing nature while the pressure rises in my bladder and I put out another, more urgent, call to Gerdy.At that he looks around, suspecting that it came from elsewhere. On second thought he may be a middle son. "Me?" I say again, more assertively this time, pointing at my chest to help him reconcile. "Did you call me a beast after you eschewed all social niceties and greeted me with a charge?""AAAAAAAAAAH!" he thoughtfully replied, retrieving a spear from his horse and heaving it at me. I like the horse. Maybe she'll help with the training. I deflect again, this time with my tail, but the movement threatens leakage. Thankfully, I feel Gerdy just on the other side of the scribe. "One moment" I say "I believe we can come to an arrangement. I invite you to look at my hoard. Window shop for your future boon, while I excuse myself for a moment. My colleague will arrive promptly to assist you. Agreed?""I shall reign down upon you as an eternal blight, foul demon!" he passionately replies. My brain reels. So many places to go. By foul, is he making a speciesist reference to my wings? To the domesticated airborne lines of my extended family? And demon? Is the rustic youth honoring me as the inter realm creature that I am, or inferring the vilified representation of the christian god shadow? Is blight meant as an allusion to the magical forest creeping invasion of suburbia?But the word that wraps my attention, breaking through the confusion, is rain. I leap from my seated position directly into the air, desperately clenching my pelvic muscles as I begin not so subtly spewing a torrent of bodily fluids directly into the misguided and inadvertent initiates. I shall not share the details of this unfortunate event again, suffice to say that now Gerdy and I have a new charge. He is doing well in that he lives and breathes, but he is not yet what one would call teachable. He will be in time. They all are. Look for him in about two thousand years. Betsy: I love the Dragon's point of view, thank you. Gabriela: I would love to be friends with this dragon. I believe I would be friends with this dragon. Betsy: And now, your dragon story, Gabriela.Gabriela: I'd be delighted to share it. Some people will claim that the sharing of the story I am about to tell you is forbidden. I am breaking all kinds of oaths by speaking some of the names and secrets that were kept for so long. Knowing all this, I must tell the story, for it as a story of where I came from, of my people and of a great power that still binds many destinies together to this day.My name is Darisi and I was born in a small fishing village on the coast of the Black Sea, in a land which was then called Thracia. I never knew my mother, for she died bringing me into this world and my father never forgave me for it. He was a blacksmith. The best in the village, from what I was told, but that was long before I was born. He had lost all hope for work and life after my mother's death and was in no condition to care for a child. I was raised by my grandmother who was a stern and superstitious woman, but did her duty and raising me the best she could. She, just like my father, never spoke of my mother. Only to say when I grew a little older that I looked just like her and that my eyes shined with the same strange golden fire. When she spoke of this it was not with admiration, but with a sense of dread. I could tell she did not care for my mother or for my amber colored eyes.Some people said that my mother was a sorceress from a far away land, who'd be witched my father so she could become pregnant and have a child. Other say that when she came to our village she was already with child, seduced my father and made him believe that I was his. I still don't know which was true, but I always felt deep in my bones that my mother came with a great magical power. This great power and magic also lived in me and what I dreamed at night. I could hear a voice calling me from across the land. Comforting me, telling me to wait, telling me that somebody was coming for me, somebody great. A few days before my ninth birthday, a strange traveling woman came to our village. I knew the moment I saw her that my life was about to be forever changed. She demanded to speak to my family, and after a short deliberation, my grandmother shared with me the news of my fate. She seemed relieved to tell me that I would go away to live with my mother…

    Full show notes at the publisher

    Spinning Jan 13, 2021
    Show notes

    Sea: Welcome to Saga Kraft. Myths, fairytales, legends. Stories comfort us, inspire us and heal us. Please join us as we share stories both old and new. More than anything, we are open to the story and it's unfolding. At times it may be one story told by one person. At times it's the same story told through three different voices. In the end we go where the story takes us, and we invite you to follow. I'm Sea, a writer, artist, and storyteller. Betsy: I'm Betsy, a medium and teacher of mystery traditions. Gabriela: I'm Gabriela, an artist and practitioner of folk magic. Saga Kraft: We are magical fairy godmothers in training.Gabriela: Today, we will be sharing stories about spinning. The magic of spinning, the goddesses of spinning, and how threads come together. How connections come together. So, we invite the blessed spinners to be with us today. The blessing threads, the connections, the wisdom, of those threads and everything in between. And we invite saga. My story is called The Dream Thread. My younger sister Kasia was lagging behind as usual. Her short, chubby legs made very little effort to keep up, but stumbled clumsily down the hill towards the river where I was heading, carrying a basket of clothes for washing.I didn't mind this chore at all. I enjoy the walk through the village and down the big white hill and the river was always pleasant, at least into spring and summer seasons. If it wasn't for Kasia slowing me down, I would be done with the washing in half the time and could spend the rest of the afternoon stretched out by the river, daydreaming while listening to the breeze and soothing flow of fast moving water. I wish mother would let me come here by myself once in a while, without Kasia. I don't see why she couldn't stay home with mother and learn how to make herself useful. I couldn't help but resent her at times, and how much she got away with, or rather how little. By the time I was six, I knew how to sweep the kitchen and front porch, feed the chickens, prepare and trim fresh herbs for supper, and mix the flour for baking.For Kasia, a very different set of rules was in place. But then again, there was a reason for that. The year Kasia was born was a really difficult one for our family, and nothing seemed the same since. Everything was threaded with a tinge of sadness. It was the year that Granny died suddenly and without any warning. We had no time to prepare and barely got to say goodbye. My mother, eight months pregnant, fell into a deep sorrow and barely survived the labor, which came a moon too early and caused great stress to her body and soul. The midwife and a couple of other older women from our village came to our cottage and stayed for nights, tending to my mother. Heating water, preparing herbs, teas, and washes, and saying prayers, whispering under their breath and exchanging concerned glances.My mother, delirious, cried out for Granny, whose hands delivered me into the world, but sadly not this new child that was arriving. The women had to remind her gently over and over that her mother was gone, but they would stay with her and would take care of her and the baby, and everything would be alright.I was a little over three years old, but I remember those few days so vividly. I didn't understand fully what was happening, but I could feel the severity of each moment that stretched painfully, and it was filled with my mother's moans at a pitch I have never heard before. My father paced outside on the porch, distant and cold with worry, unable to provide me with any solace at all. At times like these, Granny would be the one who held her apron open to receive me with an embrace, or a corner of a soft handkerchief to wipe my tears with. Granny was the only person who could have made this moment bearable for me, and she was gone. Craving her warmth and security, I crawled into bed with her favorite shawl wrapped around me. The gentle smell of lavender and honey clung to the cloth and soothed my spirit. My hand traced the raised patterns of flowers, so lovingly embroidered by Granny's hand. Almost as if she was holding my small hand in her own through the threads and textures, comforting me still, just like she always did, and as my tired eyes closed and the scent of lavender guided me into sleep, I remembered Granny's words, which she shared with me not long before she died:"You are the strong thread in the family, my Anushka, you must help your mother, and your sister when she comes, so they stay alive. You must keep their spirits strong so they are not pulled to the other world that calls for me soon now. I wish I had more time to teach you all the things you almost already know." I remember hearing her words, and other words and images throughout the night as I drifted in and out of sleep. I was awakened by a rising sound of women's voices, and through my grogginess, it seemed like more than three women were in the room. It sounded like a dozen chanting voices rose higher and higher to a crescendo of a single powerful plea, which was followed by a silence, an openness of space and time. And then I heard the midwife say with great relief "It's a girl, thank you Goddess, she is alive." And a raspy, tired, but defiant cry filled the cottage. That was the night. My sister Kasia was born. Small and fragile, but eager to fight and stay alive. Mother, also weak and fragile, with a little less eagerness for life, needed a lot more help and protection, as women often did after giving birth. The first year of Kasia's life and that of my mother's was certainly a year of in between. With death and despair looming in the doorway of her cottage, Zotia, the village wise woman, came by a couple of times a week to check on us, to prepare milk producing herbs for my mother, to talk with her, and to sit with my baby sister.I watched closely under the kitchen table, peering through the embroidered birds on the lace tablecloth. "I see you, Anushka. I see you. Come help me grind these blessed thistle herbs. Say a prayer over them. It will make them work better. There you go." she coached me gently, guiding my small hand over the bowl, the herbs responding to our combined efforts, a strong smell of the plant rising into the air. "See your sister grow plump and strong and your mother healed from sorrow." she said, while swirling the herbs around and around. I enjoyed this time with the old woman, for she reminded me of Granny and made my missing her a little lighter. Kasia and my mother made it through the year. Once introduced to food and fresh pastry so lovingly baked by the village women and my mother, once she got stronger, little Kasia ate and ate and ate like she could never get enough. Her small body filling in fast, her hands and legs plump with rolls and her once pale cheeks became pink, like summer apples.As I look at her now watching me ring out and fold the damp clothes, her big sweet eyes gazing into mine with such a calm content stillness, my heart melts, as all my previous resentments of her always wanting to be near me and slowing me down. I am so happy that she came into the world, my world and has fought so hard to stay in it, and now is so fully alive and present. "You are doing it again, Anya, you are looking past me. It's like you are asleep, but awake at the same time." she exclaimed gladly. And she was right. I was so easily lost in the moments of memory, fragments of time, that deepened fully into my recalling every detail, sound, and texture. So vibrantly alive again. I stopped the folding and used a corner of my apron to wipe the powdered sugar from her lips, leftover from the soft roll she'd enjoyed on the way to the river. She squirms a little, but doesn't resist, trusting me to make her face look a little more presentable. With the folding done and the sun still high in the sky, we head back. Kasia runs ahead when I remind her about the fried potato cakes mother would make for us when we get home. Our house is the farthest from the river at the edge of the village, and closest to the woods. Whitewashed walls, ornately painted window sills, like eyes looking out into the surroundings, and crisp embroidered curtains in the windows. As always, our mothers face peering through the curtains to watch for us coming down the path as we usually would midday. Inside smells like baked bread, spices, and freshly peeled potatoes. "I'm hungry, Mama" Kasia announces loudly, breathlessly, as she runs into the kitchen and immediately wraps herself around her mother's waist, like sticky dough." Go and help her sister hang up the clothes outside while the sun is still up." mother says, and by helping, she means for Kasia to leave her alone and not cling to her so she can get the cooking done in peace. Sighing heavily, Kasia follows me out into the yard where the drying ropes were strung. Carefully, I lift each shirt, apron, and tablecloth out of the basket and fold and pin it to the stretched line, smoothing out the wrinkles, straightening out the colors and trims so they would dry flat. The sun so graciously dancing on the red, black, yellow, and white linen threads illuminating the birds trees and women figures with hands up or down that were sewn into the borders and hems of the fabric, like stories of our lives and our family, threaded with the linen spun by our Granny and embroidered by her, and her mother before that. The love and care of their fine stitching, still crips after all these years. "Anya, Mama is calling" I am reminded by Kasia as she tugs at my skirt. I must've drifted off again, gotten lost in the shapes and memories of birds and flowers that were being kissed by the late afternoon sun. Later that evening, after supper, I watch my mother embroider a new handkerchief for Kasia. I notice how thin the embroidery motifs are, how much space was left open between the patterns my mother was creating. I couldn't help but compare how full and intricate the patterns were on some of our older tapestries and shirts. "Why are the flowers so small, Mama?" I inquired. "So I use less thread, Anya." she said, and added as she saw my confusion, "Your granny was the spinner of our family, she blessed the flax and spun it into thread so we could embroider with it. Since she died, no new thread has been spun."" What happens when the thread ends?" I asked mother, pointing at Granny's spinning wheel and the staff that stood, sad and abandoned, in the corner by the window."I don't know. It's never happened before." she replied sadly, her eyes reddening with tears a little. "We have never been without the family thread. We must make the leftover batch last a very long time, until you are a little older and can learn to spin. It would have been your Granny who was supposed to teach you, but maybe when the wise woman Zotia has some time she can show you. In a year or two. She knows the way."" Why can't you teach me Mama?"" Because I am of childbearing age. Too much interference and daily concern would cloud my vision and disturb our fate if I tried to spin, as your Granny would say." She smiled softly and touched my cheek, seeing the sadness in my eyes. As I thought about her last words, she said, "This is nothing for you to worry about. You are too young to think about such things" Only I wasn't too young. I was always thinking about such things. Ever since Granny told me I was the strong thread in the family and had to keep things together. I was always observing, paying attention, looking between moments that seem to open up for me more and more as I've gotten older. I didn't know what she really meant by that.,But today Granny's words seemed to come into sharper focus. For me, thread was very important, and our family was running out of it. I laid awake late into the night. Long after mama and Papa went to bed. With little Kasia snoring peacefully next to me, I couldn't help but think how sparse the threads were on the hems of her clothing now. Before they were so rich and full, thick with story. Now, like sad shadows of our colorful past.I had to do something. I didn't know what exactly, but the situation, it felt so heavy. I crept out of bed and went into the main room where the spinning wheel and distaff were. The Distaff, wrapped in a white cloth and red ribbon, stood tallest at the side of the wheel, almost like a person. A few loose strands of flax exposed on the bottom. Nobody has touched the distaff or the wheel since Granny's death. I remember the wise woman Zotia who attended her death, covering the distaff with great care after Granny's body our her home, her wrinkled hands making careful knots over the cloth containing our family treasure. Remembering this moment so vividly makes me nervous now to stand so close to the spinning wheel, which seems to be taking on a new life in the moonlight. The strands of flax moving gently as I breathed in and out. Hypnotized, I reach out to touch the distaff, to feel the ribbon and the bulky flax bundle underneath. As my fingers barely glide over the bundle.,the distaff jumps off its hinge and to my bewilderment ends up in my arms. Instantly I'm flooded with emotions, memories, and visions, so strong that my head spins and I'm forced to sit down. Birds flowers, trees, intricate patterns and reds and whites whirl before my eyes, coming together and growing apart into bigger swirls and movements. I see rolling hills, our forest and river coming out of the shapes and colors, all so alive. I had to keep my eyes closed to stay on the ground, and stay on the ground to let them all settle. After some time I opened my eyes slowly. The visions fading a little, but still feeling dizzy. I dragged myself to bed and crawl under the covers, the distaff still in my arms. I fall asleep right away. I thought I heard the sound of the wheel spinning in the next room, it's rhythm taking me deeper and deeper into the dreamland summoned earlier at the wheel. In the dream I was sitting at the wheel, distaff in hand with my own hands gently pulling the strands of the thick flax bundle into a single thread, strong, smooth, and just the right thickness. Glistening with the magic of hope and possibility. I couldn't believe that I was spinning and it was so easy. Then I remembered, I didn't know how to spin and that I was only dreaming. And that's when I heard the voice of a woman and she said "Just keep going , Anya, just breathe and keep going. Nothing to think about here. Just open to the flow of the dream. This is what spinning is. Remembering and dreaming. I will guide your hand, just like I guided the hand of your grandmother and her grandmother before her." I didn't know who this woman was, but surely she knew me, and her voice was the most beautiful, comforting sound I've ever heard, and I trusted her without abandon.I didn't see her exactly, but for a glimpse here and there of a long braided hair like golden wheat, eyes as light as the summer sky. The hem of her dress red like blood and ripe berries, and she was everywhere. She was as big as our cottage, even bigger. Stretched up to the sky, with fine spider thin threads of light, moving all around her and connecting them all into a living tapestry.In this tapestry I saw Granny, and I saw myself too, and the Kasia and mama. We were all together, woven into breathing lines and symbols. And she spoke to me through these symbols, moments and textures. She spoke to me in the first language, the language of the goddess. This was the first time Mokosh came to me in a dream. The first, but certainly no…

    Full show notes at the publisher

    Wolf Mothers Jan 06, 2021
    Show notes

    Sea: Welcome to Saga craft. Myths, fairytales, legends. Stories comfort us, inspire us, and heal us. Please join us as we share stories both old and new. More than anything, we are open to the story and it's unfolding. At times it may be one story told by one person, at times it's the same story told through three different voices. In the end, we go where the story takes us, and we invite you to follow. I'm Sea, a writer, artist, and storyteller.Betsy: I'm Betsy, a medium and teacher of mystery traditions.Gabriela: I'm Gabriella, an artist and practitioner of folk magic.Saga Kraft: We are magical fairy godmothers in training.Gabriela: Tonight, we will be honoring the wolf mother, and mother wolf, and the liminal spaces that bring her into being, into our lives. We ask for her blessing, for connection to her, and we ask for the blessing of Saga as well. Betsy: Do you want me to go first? Okay. My story, Wolf Mother, takes place in what's now Britain, a long time ago. Struggling to keep her horse moving forward through the densely falling snow. Wenna tried to remember the story that her two days old husband had told her on their wedding day. She kept one arm wrapped around the limp figure of his sister, one ear cocked to the rising howl of the wind, listening for another sound. The light was fading and all landmarks were disappearing in the snow. She had a good sense of direction and kept her horse moving northward, as instructed. She thought back to their wedding day, with its haste, and the story that her husband Bran had shared with her in their nuptial privacy. He'd spent his precious few hours of leave from the battlefront impressing upon her the importance of his clan's story, and delaying the inevitable bedding ceremony. It was a time of war and her young husband a battle hardened commander. Marrying for convenience and the getting of an heir on a royal woman meant that meeting, contracting, and marrying all happened in one long confusing day. Listening intently to the story he was telling, while nervously anticipating the intimacy to follow, had caused Bran to clasp her forearm and say "Focus please, Wenna" to her, much as he would to a raw recruit. He continued telling her the story of the king wolf and the elder queen wolf, stressing that he and his sister Alene were children of the old queen. Clan stories were sacred, and while some parts of them were known by the general public, others were kept secret by the initiated descendants. She knew the horse stories inside and out, and the importance, so she had pushed her worries back and focused on the story and how it fit together. Bran's voice, low and steady, the calm look in his eyes as he shared the story, and the words themselves had soon woven their magic. The complex story of rival wolf clans, kept secret in this level of detail, revealed the deeper origins of the war that had been going on for a decade. Bran was asking her, as his wife and now clan partner, to keep his sister safe, for her importance to the clan of the wolf queen. "It's through her, that our clan will prosper and her child could be the next queen of the land."Well, she could say the same thing. She was also a daughter from a royal lineage. Kings were not determined by the male line, but by the female line. The wolf king wanted to change all that by either taking Aline as his wife, or killing her. Bran wanted Wenna to protect Aline and herself at all costs.When asked if she had any questions, she pondered for a moment, and then I asked evenly "Haven't you just endangered me now, as well as your sister, by linking us together? The wolf king could kill us both, or take us both and become that much closer to the Throne of Arn." Bran hesitated and said "There is a prophecy of the wolf and the horse uniting. It's ambiguous, and yet precise. Through marriage do the two queens of the land hold back the grip of the king wolf, and draw him into their snare to face his death. Under the wolf moon in the shoe of the great horse, the daughters stand for the land and wolves decide by the death right. I will provide the snare, and his death to follow." "And are we the bait? Are you so sure? And why me as a wife, because I'm a daughter of Epona the horse?""You and Aline both are the agents of the wolf king's demise. I'll help with that. You play a vital role in keeping the land secure from him and his ravages. And Wenna, I desired marriage with you because of your reputation for cleverness, competency, and courage, all in the guise of a quiet and thoughtful young woman. I saw at once that what is said of your character is true. You have strength and loyalty in every fiber of your being. And you're said to be skilled in arms. Remember, I'll help with this. The Wolf is three months away. Keep training, keep quiet because we do not know who spies may be, and keep close to Aline." "Does she know all of this?" Yes, she's ready for her part. I wish I could say that I'm sorry to draw you into this, but your fate was determined long before. What I can do is care for you as a wife, my wife, and lend you my strength. When I saw you I knew that my heart could be yours. Let me show you that, come, wife." He departed the next dawn and that was the last she had seen of him. Word came from time to time accompanied by small gifts, all of these gifts she had on her person, sewn into her clothing as talismans.She heard the sound she'd been dreading. The long eerie howl, followed by yips and more howling. The wolves were on her trail, but were they the right wolves? She knew she had a difficult journey ahead in the snow before she reached the Horseshoe Canyon, where the horse clan rights were held. She breathed in deeply and called out to her horse grandmothers, seeing Epona in her mind and asking for strength for her and her horse Cloud, and Aline. Aline stirred in her arms and said "I've been dreaming, and now I see the mother is coming. She's great in her power under this moon. And she's coming." Wenna felt additional chills at these words." Is that a good thing or a bad thing, Aline?" "I don't know, just that she's coming and it will all unfold." "Is your brother there in the canyon, do you think? He will have had to be guided by my clan to get there.""They guide him because of you." Aline said simply.Wenna's horse moved steadily through the snow storm. She guided it by feel an inner knowledge of the canyon's presence drawing her. An increasing sense of disorientation was happening. She began to hear snatches of words and sentences, some threatening, some encouraging, and shrill laughter. She heard the wolves again, closer now, and pushed her horse forward.She knew this trail by heart but was so confused by the shapes from the snow, by the disturbing voices and even more disturbing howls of the stalking wolves, that she found it impossible to gauge exactly where they were.Alene was effected in her own way. Seeing, rather than hearing ,the pursuers in her mind's eye, she kept a running commentary going that Wenna could barely hear, but did not find encouraging. She shivered continually. Wenna was looking from side to side as she brushed accumulated snow off of their cloaks and the shoulders and head of her horse. It's dapple gray markings caused it to disappear in the luminous half flight of the snowstorm, leaving the girls to look like apparitions floating through the snow. She shook off that thought and redoubled her attention."Focus." she could hear Bran saying"Oh, please be there, Bran.." she prayed. She did not let her mind worry about whether this was the right thing, or even sane thing, to do. She was well past that, and there was nothing to do now except keep moving forward.She was surprised when Aline clutched her arm and said "She's there. Ahead of us." Something with wide spaced blue eyes was on the path ahead. The figure, untouched by the snow, wavered between that of the tall white haired woman and enormous silver white wolf. Satisfied that it had the attention of both girls, in wolf form. It turned from the main trail and veered off, turning back once to look at them and then moving on. "We should follow her" said Aline "We could get very lost." said Wenna"I think we've been found, and it's likely this isn't the horse canyon anymore.""What do you mean?" Wenna said sharply poised at the wolf's trail." I think we're in the other world now. We must follow her. She leads us to where we need to be." Over the months they'd spent together, waiting for the wolf moon, Aline had proved to be resourceful, practical, and kind, with strong gifts of seeing which she tried to hide. Much of that seeing came in dreams, but sometimes in waking visions. She was surprisingly stubborn as well, for all her dreamy ways."Keep us moving, Wenna, we can't lose her now."" Oh goddess Epona, oh, grandmother, show me, help me with what is right."She turned the horse, picking her way among the snow shrouded vegetation. The wolf hadn't left footsteps, but there was a sort of shine that marked the passage of the wolf. If she didn't think about it much, she could see the path or a few meters ahead.The howling came closer and the wind picked up the added intensity had them both hunched over Cloud. Her praying intensified, wordless now, just entreaty from her soul. Not for her own safety, but for success in bearing out what she had to do. A little further on, she heard the sound of horse's hooves flanking them on the right,and now the wolves sounded a little further away. A big mountain face loomed ahead. Wenna knew they must be in the other world because no such space existed in the terrain of the horse. She looked ahead and tried to see definition in the swirling snow and half light. It looked even more like an actual face with a mouth gaping open.Aline, pointing to the mouth said "Head there. It's a cave." As they approached the mouth, Wenna saw that they would need to dismount to enter the cave. She glimpsed eerie white figures, indistinct but tall, around her. All of them bowed slightly to the snow covered trio. Despite the wind pulling and pushing simultaneously at them with it's skirling wail, Wenna felt that they were moving towards a place of calmness. Sliding off the horse and keeping a distance from the indistinct figures, Wenna and Aline entered the cave, leading cloud behind. It was quiet in here and large enough to allow the horse to shelter from the storm. Another opening was apparent at the back of this chamber. Taking moments of precious time, for the sense of moving towards her fate was growing stronger by the minute, Wenna hesitated to pull off Cloud's saddles, but contended herself in giving some oats to the horse from her pocket and rubbing the inch or two of snow from the bulk of the horse. "I'll be back." she wispered"Ready?" said AlineTogether they entered the second cavern through the tall narrow passageway. This cave was dimly lit by glowing mushrooms scattered along the sidewalls. Ochre and black paintings were on the walls, depicting wolves, and partial wolf and humans, and humans. Aline clutched her again. "We're in the cave of the mother. I've dreamt this.""What happens next?" "We meet her." They could smell wood smoke and something herbal in the air. It was a fresh, not stale, odor. They moved towards the second doorway, this one lower and wider. Stepping through required hunching over, but they emerged into a more or less circular room with a fire burning in the center. At the fire was the white haired woman, dressed in gray with necklaces of wool's teeth and amber, wrapped in fur, watching them with eerie blue eyes. Wenna noticed another smell, that of wet dogs. No, wet wolves. She could see two wolves flanking this woman, but laying on their sides near the fire. "Come closer." said the woman, her light eyes compelling them.Alene moved forward and gracefully bowed a full courtly gesture. "Daughter," said the woman "sit here." She indicated a place by one of the wolves,who seemed to be dreaming. "Mother of my granddaughter." She said to Wenna Wenna put her hands to her womb in surprise, a gesture that revealed its truth. "Sit here." She pointed to the open place by the other wolf. "A battle happens now and we must guide it. Take off your wet cloaks and wrap these around you." She handed them huge furs, which surely must be those of the near mythical dire wolves."We'll be here for a long while. Drink this." She handed them earthen mugs of some herbal drink.Wenna found herself drinking without comment. What they were doing seemed like the only thing that could be done. And in a dreamlike compliance, she wrapped the rug around herself, seeing that there was enough of it to cover the dreaming wolf as well." Close your eyes and link with us." said the woman She found herself in an eerie landscape. Alike, but different from the snowy place she and Alene had been traveling in. Here, the sound of the wind was gone. The snow continued to fall and four women stood waiting for her to get her bearings. One being Aline, and the other the wolf mother. They moved quickly through the landscape, followed by the ghostly figures of wolves, with all their many colors. Doomed.They were back on the trail, moving fast, leading to the Horseshoe Canyon. They could see many footprints in the trampled snow, of horse, men and wolves. Next they saw blood on the snow, which glowed with shocking vibrancy in the dim landscape. "Call your people." the wolf mother commanded Wenna opened her arms to the sky and wind filled her lungs and she trumpeted like a mare in battle.Behind her she could feel the pressure of the turn of the fast moving herd of spirit horses, changing directions and trumpeting back to her. The horses began to circle around. The dark wolves ringed around, and harrying, the men and women in those shield formation who had been backed up against the Horseshoe Canyon wall from deeper in the Canyon. The actual horses came, led by an old and feral mare with one remaining eye and a huge star blaze over her heart. "Mother!" cried Wenna The mare gave her a transmission of so much emotion and information that Wenna nearly fell under the weight of it, then as the power and strength of the transmission took hold, Wenna felt and saw what the mare did. That this battle, now raging between dark wolves and horse, white spirit wolves and foreign men, and foreign men and her people, was happening in more realms than merely mortal, and it would be a defining battle for the outcome of humans and the other world. She also saw two radiant spirit roads, white horse and white Wolf, converging into a node of power. She saw Bran at the center of the battle and focused all of her strength to him, for making its way to him was a figure that flashed from wolf to man and back, and who was huge in both aspects. Bran was well aware of him and also somehow of her, for his center, a shaft of love and steadiness that shone like a god ray and reached to her heart."I carry your wolf." she told him. This struck him like lightning, and he seemed to double in size. As he moved forwards to face the dark wolf, he moved fast, blades flashing, clearing a path to him, the wolf, and keeping him always in his line of view. He fought with two swords, which she prayed would be enough against the teeth and sword of the wolf sh…

    Full show notes at the publisher

    Elves Dec 30, 2020
    Show notes

    Sea: Welcome to Saga Kraft. Myths, fairytales, legends. Stories comfort us, inspire us, and heal us. Please join us as we share stories both old and new. More than anything, we are open to the story and it's unfolding. At times it may be one story told by one person. At times it's the same story told through three different voices. In the end, we go where the story takes us, and we invite you to follow. I'm Sea a writer, artist, and storyteller.Betsy: I'm Betsy, a medium and teacher of mystery traditions.Gabriela: I'm Gabriella, an artist and practitioner of folk magic. Saga Kraft: We are magical fairy godmothers in training. Betsy: Our stories today are about elves and elf land. We hope you enjoy them. Sea: I will go if it's okay. Once upon a time, there was an elf who wanted to fly and every night he would dream of soaring through the air. One morning, after such a dream, he was brushing his teeth and just out of the corner of his eye, he thought he saw a horrible blackness rotting away at his teeth in the back.He jumped up and gasped, first choking on then spitting his toothpaste. After rinsing out his mouth and changing his shirt he went to see his grandparent, as one never knows the gender of the elves in his family until one sees him or her, since they change it. Well today he was a grandfather. The elf told him what happened."Not to worry," the grandfather said "it was a waking dream. They happen to the best of us." So the next day the elf had his teeth cleaned and everything was fine. But, a while later, the elf was looking into the mirror again when he thought he saw a king galloping up behind him. To be clear, the king himself was not galloping. The horse he was riding on was. In any event, the elf went running to his neighbor and excitedly told her about it. "What a nice dream!" The neighbor exclaimed, and called to some friends passing by. She told them all about the elves vision of a King coming through town. They laughed and cajoled. Someone brought a cake and they all told tales of the beautiful things they wished would happen, and on the way home, the elf made a game of walking through the fresh hoof prints that led through town, laughing at himself because he actually thought he might see a king .And one season turned into the next before the elf was fixing his hair, when he saw a golden pen in the mirror. He recognized it as the prize at the elvin poetry contest. He was so excited that he immediately went running to his grandparents' house. "Grandmother!" He said to the old elf who was feeling feminine, but then stopped. "I hope you are doing well today. I just wanted to thank you for the other day. My teeth are great."" That's wonderful, but did you really come all that way to tell me that?" The old elf asked."I just thought it would be nice to see you" the young elf said, as he scurried home to write a few poems, which he immediately entered into the contest.On the day of the poetry reading the elf stared deeply into the mirror, hoping to see the golden pen, but nothing appeared. He went to the contes ,and, when it was his turn, hesitantly took the stage. He read his poem about flying and falling and flying again. In the end, he probably took first place, but writing poems about flying wasn't the same as actually doing it.The next day, the elf looked into the mirror and searched out of the corner of his eye for an image of flight. He tried jumping up, suddenly and erratically twisting in the air, attempting to create a flight like image. When it wasn't working, he tried flicking his hair back and forth to see if he could create a flying scene with that.No luck. Finally, in desperation, he drew a picture of flight onto the mirror itself. Then he went into his craft area and began to sew himself a set of wings. He had to make them perfect. Both potentially wind altering, he billowed the fabric in the air to test this ,and beautiful. He drew intricate lacy feathers on the wings.When he finally had them perfected, he crept into the forest telling no one. There, he climbed up onto a large boulder. He avoided the cliffs as he was not a fool, and gently put them on. He looked like a blow up of a normal bird on a reasonable sized stone, only huge. Thinking of the mirror and psyching himself up into his most bird likes state of mind, he took a flight inducing leap off the rock and plummeted into the soft dirt and leaves below, significantly muddying his beautiful new wings. Bitterly, he returned home and began to scream at his mirror. "I did everything!" He said." Everything I could to fly!" but as he was yelling, a bird flew by his window and cast a shadow onto the top of the mirror. Straightening himself up, he smiled and went to work.The earth took a trip and a half around the sun before he tested passed, and earned his elven pilot license. Gabriela: Thank you, Sea. That was absolutely lovely. Sea: Thank you. Gabriela: I'm very curious about the teeth.Sea: About the teeth?Gabriela: About the teeth. What were the teeth? Or his illusion of the teeth? Something that was a place setting for a different shift in reality for him? I don't know. It just really struck me, like, the teeth scared me because there's such an entrance into communication, or into that sort of other worldliness. Or losing something of this world to gain something of another. Sea: I think that you're right. So, to be honest, this is the first time I am thinking about the teeth, but I absolutely think you're right. To me, the teeth mean, you know, to sink one's teeth into something or to be willing to defend and protect. And yeah, I think the teeth were a call for him to show up to something that was calling out to him. Betsy: I was struck by him seeing the darkness in the mirror around the teeth, too. And then just seeing that that became a mirror that allowed him to get information or to perceive something. And so, was he seeing that mirror as kind of a magic mirror that gave him direction? Sea: Yes, he was, he was seeing it as a magic mirror. And in fact, I had that line in it and I read it differently.Betsy: The gender changing aspects of the elves too, and that type of fluidity, that could be part of their transformational abilities. Sea: Yeah. Strangely on the transformative note, I was so aware that it was not my voice. I was so aware that the voice I was speaking in was so not my own voice. Gabriela: Yeah, to me, the whole story, it was so beautifully written and it felt like such a riddle. Like, it felt from beginning to end that this process that the elf was going through and the earning, the yearning to fly, you know, and I caught myself thinking, are elves, supposed to fly? Can they fly? Why does he want to fly? You know, it was so multilayered and I realized that so much lore, and just the nature of elves, is about magic and being able to manifest anything out of nothing. So he was trying to do something that has already been done. Because him yearning for it, if we're thinking in elf language and magic language, flight has already happened, he was already able to do it.Sea: Right. Yeah, I liked that he had to sort of tell the story of it before he could actually begin to encounter it, too. Betsy: And also gaining that confidence in seeing that he could enter that contest and win the contest, I think possibly built his confidence into, you know, that step by step of what it takes to actually transform and change. Not only our capabilities, but what we think is really possible too. So, that was a lovely touch.Sea: Yeah, both in the story and at least in my life, it feels like the, the middle things are off topic. Like I want this thing and then I'd have to go do these weird things. And then I get that thing I wanted. And it feels like it was a total different journey, but still a necessary one.Gabriela: I have to say, I secretly appreciate the fact that he had to brush his teeth.Sea: There just aren't enough tooth brushing stories, right? Gabriela: It certainly brings the magic into our world. And we try to separate our mundane from the non mundane realities, but it is all together. It exists together. So I appreciate that very much. Betsy: Well and it helps us to understand more things about elves, that they have some of the similar things that we have in life, that they must deal with. But what else is possible? Flight, apparently. Thank you. Sea: Next step?Betsy: I'll do it. My story about the elves is a continuation also of a story about Tess and the goblin cat.Tess and the goblin cat were settling in together. She was still finding it hard to discover the true name of the cat. She called it a different name every few days. She had received a lot of advice from her relatives about the cat. The first advice was to find out whether it was male or female. The next, was to give it some time to discover its temperament. It's temperament didn't change much though. It was devoted to her, suspicious of her mother, and seemed to watch everything with the cynical air.It wasn't going to let anyone but Tess touch it. Tess supposed that may have been the result of living with goblins for the first weeks of its life, and tried to make up to the cat for that. "Oh cat, I wish the goblin boy hadn't kicked you so hard." Then there was the problem of its long leggedness, that had necessitated a visit to her great aunt Hulda. Hulda, an aged, bent, crone of a lady, with sharp but faded blue eyes, had laughed one loud "HAHA" when she saw the cat." I haven't seen one of these since I was a child." She touched cat on the head with a gnarled finger, pulling it onto her aprons lap. To Tess's surprise, the cat went limp, curling in her lap and purring."I'll work on its size and legs" Hulda said, while stroking the cat. "Gudrun is in the kitchen making tea, Gudrun!" She called Tess's relative Gudrun came out of the kitchen, drying her hands on a nearly identical apron. Her hair was in platinum braids. Her eyes a violet blue and her cheeks rosy. Her smile lit up the room." Come into the kitchen and have tea and let Hulda do her work." Her accent was Scandinavian and lilting. Tess followed her into the kitchen."Sit down and eat" said Gudrun, " I will join you. Your mother will assist Hulda.". She sat Tess down in the window embrasure seat and the two girls drank tea and ate sublime pastries. Tess could feel herself relaxing and realizing the weeks with Cat had been wonderful. To finally have a familiar, after looking for it for years, but stressful because the cat was not usual in any sort of way."What do you suppose she's doing to it?" Tess asked Gudrun."She's concealing its appearance so it can pass for normal." Gudrun said matter of factly. "Shape-shifting is a gift."" Oh, I'd love to watch that."" She won't let you. Your presence would pull the cat's awareness to you. Best to let them do their work in peace. Drink, eat," She said with Icelandic persistence " then I will tell you a story. Hulda says I'm to practice my storytelling with you." "I'd love that!" Tess was fascinated by her older cousin. "Good, would you rather hear about the trolls of stickies, or Hildr the queen of the elves?" "Hildr, please." "All right. A long time ago in a part of Iceland, that was part pasture and part mountains, lived an unmarried farmer named Lars. He had quite a few workers to help with the farm, and they were all cared for by a young woman named Hildr, who was quiet, fastidious and hardworking. She kept to herself and worked from dawn long into the evening. Though a prosperous farm, Lars had a hard time keeping herdsman for his sheep because, for the past years, on each Christmas morning, his herdsman would be found dead in his bed, having died in the night. The farmer and other workers would spend Christmas Eve at the local church as was the custom. The herdsman would not attend because gathering the sheep took so much time in the early dark of the afternoon that the herdsman would have to stay at the house. Hildr also refrained from going to the church. She had to make the food for Christmas day dinner, when everyone returned. For a time, the farmer tried to manage without a herdsman, losing sheep and income, but at least not losing any more human lives. The herdsmen had all died without a mark on them, so no suspicion fell on anyone at the farm. It was a troubling situation and a dark blot on the farm.Then a day came when a man came knocking, asking for the job of herdsman. He was strong, bold, somewhat handsome, and quite full of self-confidence. The farmer didn't want to hire him and told him why. The man said he wasn't afraid, and he needed the job and a place to live. The man added that fear of what might happen wouldn't interfere with him doing his job and he would take good care of the sheep. Reluctantly, the farmer hired him, which was an answer to the man's urgent prayer and need, for he had skills, but nowhere to live and needed the work. He was a hard worker that everyone came to like, and the farm began to feel almost like normal.Then the days before Christmas came. The farmer told the man he could come to church with them and let the sheep fend for themselves in the night. The man declined, saying he wasn't afraid and would do his job. The party of workers and the farmer left in the daylight hours to get to the church for the all night Christmas Eve vigil. The farmer left with a heavy heart fearing, the worst. Hildr, finishing her preparations for tomorrow's dinner, fed the man his supper, who went right to bed afterwards. The man was tired, but he knew he could only sleep lightly as he remembered what had happened to all those other herdsman who had been as desperate as he for work. He resolved to stay awake, but found a strange drowsiness coming over him. Fighting this worrying sleepiness, he resolved to stay awake.He was half dozing when he heard the door to his room open and quiet steps coming towards his bed, he saw through the dark of the room that it was Hildr. Her small warm hand touched his face, inserting something into his mouth, which he instinctively knew was a magic bridle. With the bridal attached, he was powerless to resist as Hildr dragged him from the bed to the front door and out into the snowy night. She climbed onto his back and, twitching the rein, she caused him to rise into the air and rode him through the dark winter night under the stars, under the snow, until they came to a high mountain which had a yawning cavernous opening.She dismounted, tied the reins to the rock, and leaped into the opening. The herdsman tried to move, not wanting to stay tied out in the cold of the night. He couldn't move at all , until he finally struggled three from the bridle. When he leaped into the cavern opening following Hildr, he found himself falling, falling, falling into another world, and eventually landing in a landscape unlike the snowy one he had left behind. Green meadows with flowers were all around him. He saw Hildr moving swiftly in a direction and he followed as fast as he could. He knew now she was not an ordinary mortal and, for protection, he pulled a magic star stone from his pouch given to him by his grandmother long ago. The stone kept him invisible and he followed Hildr until he could see a lovely building in the distance with a great crowd of people waiting in front. Hildr made her way there, straight into the arms of a man who seemed to be the king of this place. Two small children were there with him. Hildr, her face glowing,…

    Full show notes at the publisher

    Yule Dec 23, 2020
    Show notes

    Sea: Welcome to Saga Kraft. Myths, fairytales, legends. Stories comfort us, inspire us and heal us. Please join us as we share stories both old and new. More than anything, we're open to the story and it's unfolding. At times, it may be one story told by one person. At times it's the same story told through three different voices. In the end, we go where the story takes us and we invite you to follow. I'm Sea, a writer, artist, and storyteller. Betsy: I'm Betsy, a medium and teacher of mystery traditions.Gabriela: I'm Gabriela, an artist and practitioner of folk magic. Saga Kraft: We are magical fairy godmothers in training. Gabriela: Today's stories will be about this time of the year. Winter time, Yule time, the winter solstice. So many traditions, sacred traditions around this time. So many customs. We want to honor the sacred time with our stories today and share with you the stories of Yule time. And we hope that they bring blessing to you and that they sooth you during the season.My story is called the secret supper. The wind was unusually wild this year, Jania thought, while glancing out the window before she pulled out the final batch of Christmas Eve rolls out of the oven. The gusts of snow whirled and danced joyfully outside against the blue- black winter backdrop. How nice it was to watch it from the safety of a warm home, she thought, smiling. It was almost time for their feast. As soon as the first star of the evening was spotted by one of her grandchildren they could sit down and start the festivities. As usual Jania spent the last few days cooking and getting the home celebration ready for her and her family. The winter holiday, and especially Christmas season, was very important. It was the most magical and sacred time. And she was so lucky to have a big family to share it with, and a warm home and a table full of food. This was a great blessing. "I see it! I see the star!" Cried out excited Tomek, the oldest of her grandchildren, which encouraged the younger sister and cousin to cry out with excitement."All right everybody, let's gather together." Announced Stefan, after checking with Jania to make sure everything was ready. He was always happy to help her, but Yanya rarely took him up on the offer. The kitchen was her domain and he knew better than to interfere. Besides, their two daughters circled around her effortlessly. The three of them moved with grace and precision and created dishes that smelled and looked heavenly. After all, they have been making these dishes together for many, many years. Since it was time, Stefan turned off the electric lights and lit candles to aluminate their evening in a more intimate way."Ahh, this is more like it," Jania sighed gratefully as she entered the family room. Now they could truly start. They shared the Christmas wafer with each other, an old tradition of offering good wishes to each family member while eating delicate bread. The oldest couple would always start first. They would share with each other, then their children and grandchildren. Kind words and simple blessings were exchanged."In the coming year, I wish you happiness and good health. That is most important." Stefan said to Jania" And I wish that your arthritis will ease up so that we can enjoy more walks together like we used to." Jania said. The younger couples wished each other success at work, ease in their marriage and happiness. The children mimicked the words they heard from the adults and made their own sweet, heartfelt wishes to the family. Siblings promised not to argue and to help parents around the home. Even at a young age, they took the sharing of wishes seriously. They could see and feel how important these exchanges were for their family and how open everybody's hearts were. Twelve dishes, no more, nor less, were served. Vegetarian and fish dishes only. No roasted red meats or poultry could be consumed tonight. Red borscht with dumplings, fried carp, pickled herring, cabbage stew, mushroom noodles, fried potato cakes, poppy seed rolls, and a variety of breads and gorgeous rolls and ginger cookies, which were shaped like stars, deer, canes, and evergreen trees. The family ate, sang songs - carols - shared stories, and laughed for hours. Their bellies full and faces warmed by joy and the soft glow of candles on the table and all around. And as always an empty seat and plate we're left at the table, the chair decorated with extra ribbons and a beautifully embroidered cushion on the seat.Little Gosia, the youngest of the children, admired the cushion and seat with curiosity. "Who will sit there? Are we waiting for somebody?" She inquired, while reaching out for another sugar glazed bun." It's the seat for the wandering guests. Don't you remember? You asked about it last year, too." Her mother Maryla answered smiling.The young girl pinched her face in fierce concentration and shook her head. "No, I don't remember. Who is the wandering guest and why haven't they arrived yet?" "Nobody knows who it is until they arrive, and often they don't arrive at all." Her grandfather told her, smiling under his mustache, knowing that this will make her ponder even more. "But whoever it is, no matter how strange or unfamiliar, there must always be a seat ready for them at the table. They can not be turned away. Not on this night." He added, glancing at his wife Jania lovingly, who looked at the empty plate and smiled. "Yes, tonight is a true test of hospitality, communion, and relationship. I learned this from Father Foka Szumej a long time ago." she said "Who is Father Foka Szumej? Is he coming? Is the plate for him?" Now all the children were curious. Jania's eyes softened and fixed outside the window, where the whirling snow gave form to beasts and creatures of the mountain nearby. She could almost hear their songs from far away." Who is Foka Szumej, you ask. In order to tell you that, you must hear the whole story." Jania said, and settled more comfortably in a chair near the fireplace with little Gosia climbing onto her lap, excited to hear another one of granny's tales. "It was a long, long time ago. I was just a girl that older than you, Gosi, and the night was Christmas Eve. Very much like it is now, cold and windy and snowy. My father, mother, and I were traveling around the mountain to visit my great parents, your great grandparents, who lived one village over. We had a basket full of sheep cheese and honey to share with them as well as some freshly baked ginger cookies.We left a little later in the day than we had hoped, and a blizzard came out of nowhere and caught us by surprise. Papa knew that we were taking a small risk of venturing so late in the evening in December, but since he knew the side of the mountain so well and we didn't have a long way to travel, he thought we would be able to avoid any mishaps. But the weather fates had a different plan.The road we normally took was blocked by a massive tree, and we had to go around a north side of the wood to the more treacherous side of the mountain to get to town where their family was waiting for us. The winds were sharp and cold, and the snow obscured our vision and it was very difficult to walk."Oh sweet Lord, help us find our way, help us find shelter." Mama whispered under her breath while holding me close to her. I could tell she was anxious. She was not from these parts. She married the handsome shepherd, my Papa, and settled in with him in the hills of the Carpathian mountains, near the town of Alicia. She often complained a little about how wild and untamed the winds were in these parts, and how the people connected to the winds and trees in a non-Christian way. Papa, even though he was familiar with this land and the non-Christian ways, was beginning to grow nervous too. We wandered in circles unable to find our way safely to the path we needed to be in, and the wind only grew stronger. My father turned to my mother and said, "We have no choice. We must head to the north side of the mountain where the old man Foka Szumej lives, if he still lives. My grandfather used to tell me stories about the man, and other people talked of him, too. He is a hermit, a guardian of the mountain.A weather worker, among other things. He lives alone and is not fond of people, but right now his dwelling is our closest safety, and I know the way." My mother nodded, understanding the dire situation we were in. She trusted Papa and had faith that God and this Foka Szumej would offer them shelter and save them from the cold. Smiling tightly at me to console me, she held me closer and followed Papa around the other side of the mountain, which appeared more ominous and treacherous than where we just came from. The trees swayed and bowed intensely, almost as if they were ready to lift off the ground and start walking. The wind sounded like harsh whispers, but we kept going.Father seemed driven by an invisible force. Forward and onward, looking back to make sure we were close by, he kept going. How did he know where he was going? I don't know. It was impossible to see anything, and the winds only danced stronger as we went up, the dense snow beating our faces sharply. Suddenly Papa stopped ahead and mentioned for us to stay back. "Who goes there? A loud booming voice rose above, seeming to be coming from all around as if the wind itself was questioning us.We saw the beast first. A white/gray wolf dog charging towards us at great speed. Then we heard a loud, sharp whistle and the creature stopped just a foot away from where we were. And then the wind stopped, too. Suddenly. Abruptly. Freezing a moment in time so I could hear my mother's heart beating as I clutched to her belly. We heard thundering footsteps, and a staff driven into thick snow with a thud." Who goes there?" the booming voice asked again, much closer this time. But now the voice seemed to be coming from one direction. I turned my head and saw a figure of a man and a big hat with a tall walking stick looming over us. My father took off his cap in a greeting gesture and said "We were caught in a blizzard and have lost our way Father Foka Szumej we seek shelter for the night. We don't mean to disturb you this evening, but we are desperate and cold. I will gladly repay you however I can." The old man pulled his wolf dog closer to him as the creature was restless and still unsure whether we were friends or foe, ready to strike on us at the slightest nod from his master. "Put your hat back on. Only a fool would take it off in such weather, and only a fool would travel in such a night." the old man grumbled, as he eyed our family with dismay. My father put his hat back on immediately. My mother crossed herself discretely, though not unnoticeably. His icy blue eyes settled on me, as I was staring right at him, hypnotized by his electric blue eyes peering like cold fire from under his hat."Come, follow me quickly while the wind is still, which won't be long." he said, as he turned around and began to hike back up towards the house, expecting us to keep up, which we did just barely. The man was incredibly fast for his age. The uphill slope didn't slow his pace at all. At times he appeared to fly up in steps, his cane and feet above ground more than on it. My mother, gripping my hand, tightly, her eyes wide in mild horror. But we followed him. What choice did we have? After some time we arrived, shivering and breathless at the front porch of his cottage. Old man Foka Szumej knocked the snow off his boots while the Wolf dog shook vigorously. Foka Szumej didn't invite us in exactly, but left the door open, so we followed him inside, grateful for the warmth of the hearth fire and the shelter. We took a few moments to slow our breaths and shake off the freezing cold which we came from. After a few minutes, Papa addressed our host who seemed preoccupied and indifferent with what we were doing. "We are in your debt, Father Foka Szumej we don't want to be a bother. We can just sleep in the corner of the room." Papa said, while pointing to a humble side of the house." You will do no such thing." Foka Szumej said sharply." You will take my bed chamber and stay out of my way. You have stumbled here on a most auspicious night. My guests will soon arrive and you can not get in the way of my custom. You will remain behind closed doors, unheard and unseen." he said in a tone that meant no negotiation. "Guests?" I wondered, "He was expecting guests? " I looked around the room and saw a sturdy wooden table with rustic plates and wooden spoons upon it. Winter berries, nuts and dried meats, as well as cups of golden liquid were laid out carefully. Mama looked confused, but Papa had a strange tight look on his face as he slowly took in the table setting. "The secret supper." he whispered. "Yes, it is tonight. And you will not interfere." Foka Szumej said clearly. He could hear across rooms as well as make his eyes glow in a blue fire. Father reached out into our basket and pulled out a round package of fresh sheep cheese and jar of honey." Please, for your feast. May it appease your guests." he said, while offering it to Foka Szumej the old man didn't refuse. "Set it on the table and to go retire to my bed chambers. Close the door. I don't want to see you at all for the rest of the night. No matter what you hear out here, stay in that room." he said, and added while looking right at me, " and you, under no circumstances, can make a sound. Understood.?"I nodded in agreement, stunned and amazed by the events of this night under strange and terrifying hosts. Without further discussion, the three of us went to the room and closed the door as Foka Szumej demanded. In the privacy of the room, Mama and I had all kinds of questions. "What is the secret supper? This sounds very unchristian." Mama whispered, concerned. "It's an old custom, very old. I didn't know anybody practiced it anymore. I've heard about it from my grandparents. It happens on this night. It's a sacred night to more than just us Christian folk." Papa told her"Are there people really coming here? Why can't we see them and sit with them?" Mama asked"They're not exactly people. Remember, these ways are different from what we know and remember, and much older. Better we just get some rest. At least we are not out there in the snow with whatever creatures roam the night." Papa said, which caused Mama to cross herself again." Who is coming? Who is coming to the feast of Papa? I asked desperately curious." Nobody we know, Jania, and they are no friends of ours, but that is the way. Just keep quiet and go to sleep. Tomorrow will be Christmas morning and we will safely find our way home, I promise you." he said, while bringing me and mama closer to him and towards the big bed.With me snuggled safely next to them, and them so exhausted, they fell asleep shortly. But not me. I could not and would not sleep, not with such a mysterious feast soon to occur in the next room. The winds howled wildly outside and the tree branches tapped on the cottage windows and roofs so loudly. Wolves close by howled, as did other creatures, making noises I have never heard before. I listened to all of the sounds wide-eyed in the darkness of the room, with my parents sleeping soundly huddled together. Through the wind and cracking branches, I heard a loud knock. I snuck out of bed and crept up to the door, which was old and rough, with some of the tree knots…

    Full show notes at the publisher

    Magical Weapons Dec 16, 2020
    Show notes

    Sea: Welcome to Saga Kraft. Myths, fairytales, legends. Stories, comfort us, inspire us and heal us. Please join us. As we share stories, both old and new. More than anything, we are open to the story and it's unfolding. At times, it may be one story told by one person. At times it's the same story told through three different voices.In the end, we go where the story takes us and we invite you to follow. I'm Sea, a writer, artist, and storyteller. Betsy: I'm Betsy, a medium and teacher of mystery traditions. Gabriela: I'm Gabriela, an artist and practitioner of folk magic. Saga Kraft: We are magical fairy godmothers in training. Betsy: I'd like to start out by welcoming Saga, and our stories today are about magical weapons.The white chalk horse gleamed in the Moonlight on the late fall evening. The wind blew from the South making its way through the rolling hills and ruffling the leaves of the hedge rows, The sound of a lone horse cart, clopping, hoofs, and wooden wheel rims, creaking harness and the puffing of a horses breath could be heard from the ridge top road down in the homes in the small village.Wives put their shawls over their ears. Husbands started fiddling with their pipes and tossing more logs on the fire. Children pulled the covers over their heads, tucked three and four to a bed. The huge man sitting lazily on the seat of the cart, pulled it to a stop once the road was level and jumped down, giving the horse a rest from pulling the combined weight of firewood, his blacksmithing gear, and himself.He put his hands behind him, stretching out the muscles of his back and his broad chest Talking gently to his horse, a companion for many years, he checked its hooves for stones and offered a handful of oats. Almost there. Boy, my fine fellow, almost there. The horse grunted stomping, one hoof to the ground, indicating that he'd prefer to move on and get out of the wind.The man laughed and pulled the reins to the front. Leading the horse and stretching out his long muscular legs for an ambling mile or so. Several miles later, having climbed back on the card, the wagon pulled to a stop by an ancient long barrow. The mystery of this place was perceptible. Trees, having lost their leaves, provided something of a windbreak around the ancient stones.Wayland unhitched the horse, throwing a warm blanket over him for the time being. It would soon be hot enough. He jumped up into the wagon, hoisted up the anvile and tossed it to the ground in the direction of the long stone structure. The moon was coming on full and gleaming above the far off Hills in the distance across fields, lying fallow.Wayland stood in the Moonlight, looking around and sensing for the closest living creatures. None very close, he thought satisfied. He had private things to do, and this was the best place that he could do them. He didn't like to be spied on. This barrow was one that was avoided by humans because it led into an opening into the realm of the old ones.On top of that, the white horse gleaming in the distance was part of the province of the horse goddess Epona No one would dare to be out in the night here. After setting up the anvil in a place where the wind could reach it, the furnace was pulled to the cart's edge and heaved to the ground. He set that up in the windbreak area adjacent, humming to himself.He conjured the fire with wood from nine different kinds of trees. He pulled out a great bellows and set to work some hours later with molten metal and the fierce firelight casting shadows on the sculpted planes of his face. He was sweating and smiling with satisfaction. Whatever came out of this night's work, it would be something very fine, he thought. He moved around to do his blacksmithing work, finding strength from the earth, and different qualities available at different times of the year.This place was accessible to old magic to Epona's strength and to the old ones. Unlike other blacksmiths, he didn't plan anything ahead of time.He just felt the need to be in a particular place at a particular time,and some weapon or tool came out of that. Somehow the one it was made for always found him. He wasn't particularly interested in making that easy since he'd once been captured and forced to create. Now, trust didn't come easily and he preferred to keep moving.Getting into the rhythm of making had its own reward. He pulled deeply from the earth working the old magic into the iron. He pulled down moonlight and incorporated the wind. The iron rods were piling up and he kept working. Whatever it was going to be, it was going to be big. A sword most likely, but what kind of sword and for whom.Unlike other times, he had no clear sense of the requirements for this blade. Shrugging, he decided pattern welding would be ideal and set to work. He was at the moment where the long blade was beginning to take form when he felt a prickling between his shoulder blades.The sounds of his elvin blacksmith's hammer, beating the sword into shape, nearly muffled the arrival sounds of the lean woman on a dapple gray horse. Securing her magnificent steed near the blacksmith's apparently older cob, she observed wryly that the horses were likely to get along more easily than she and the surly Wayland. Continuing his rhythmic beat on the anvil, he called out. "who's there?" Not a fae, not Epona, not human. Sky born? He edged around the anvil, massive hammer, still striking and rhythm. He saw her first out of the corner of his eye. She stood, like a blade herself, absolutely still and lethal with cold smoke gray eyes looking out of a stylized winged helmet. Elvin manufacture, he thought automatically, but not an elf. Certain of herself, but not of her welcome, she said "blacksmith, I have a need of you, or rather, of your help.", She amended when she saw his curling lip. She was heavily armed with a sword belt, two swords: one long, one short, and knives strapped in her iron shod boots. Not a fae. Her tabard, over gleaning mail coat, showed a vast tree with swans circling below on a pond. Valkyrie. Wayland felt hot anger and cold loss looking at her and remembering nine years with a Valkyrie, who simply left one day, never to return. She looked impatient as she saw the shifting story moving across his face and in his eyes, and the abrupt silence when he stopped swinging the hammer. "You dare?", he said coldly. "Or, are you here for me?". Another realization flashing across his face. ""Of course, I'm here for you. But not to take you in any sense of the word, blacksmith." She said evenly. "I'm not here about what happened before. I'm here about what happens now and what unfolds in the future." "Do you dare come here as a Valkyrie after all she put me through?" " He asked scathingly Well, I'm a Valkyrie, but in truth I came here for a sword" " from you?" She hesitated and then let her guard down Infinitesimally."I would love one of your swords, who wouldn't? But as you see, I'm armed with sky metal. No, I want a sword for a hero yet to be."" At your own request? Or here at the will of the Allfather?" He asked, deciding the best path forward was to get down to business and get her gone. "As the will of the Allfather, blacksmith. As you have never understood, or you would have cherished your Valkyrie and then let her go."She had several tense moments of conversation with the blacksmith, understandable under the circumstances, before he nodded curtly in agreement. He resumed the pounding and beating of the sword. Already a pattern welded while she drew out her own hammer and instruments. He shaped the sword, working quickly and with consummate skill. She poured a flask of water into the cooling barrel, which changed the texture and color of the water, shifting it to luminous pale fire blue. When the sword gleamed silver, proud and deadly, he put it back into the flame and heated it up again. When it was malleable, but still holding its form , he pulled it out of the flames and onto the anvil. She took up her own hammer, shaped like a mini Mjölnir, and moved into place over the sword and began a complicated incantation in an ancient tongue while stamping cuts onto the length of the blade. Eerie currents swirled from the ground below wrapping her in a dark glow.Occasionally peering over her shoulder and letting her know when the sword needed to go in the fire again, Wayland watched as letters appeared in what looked to be an ancient language. He knew not to interrupt her as she worked, but tried to puzzle out what she was writing. Hard to tell as it kept changing.It seemed what she was doing was repeated three times in three different languages. When she finally completed what looked like a line of runes, she pulled another instrument out of the fire. This stamping tool allowed for less fine script. And with this, she hammered what were clearly large runes onto the blade that were bigger than the condensed and very fine script.These runes glowed with an Eldridge light and Wayland recognized the victory rune of the god Tyr. She put the blade back into the fire and pulled out her boot knife, slashing her forearm and dropping her blood onto the blade. Magic poured from her voice, which grew loud and harsh, and magic flowed from her hands into the blade until the script glowed and the larger runes blossomed with fire.Eventually satisfied, she passed the blade back to him and said "Sign it with your mark." He complied adding his own charm in an elvin tongue and passed it back to her after flipping it from side to side, to see it in its entirety. She intoned another chanted charm and plunged it into the luminous water.The rune script and solo runes all glowed, as did Wayland's Mark, and then went out, leaving the blades silver and quiet. She pulled a large crystal bead, carved with spirals and strung on a leather thong, from her belt purse. Wrapping the leather cord around the hilt of the sword, she breathed more charms over the crystal. "Awaken, lifestone" where the only words that Wayland understood.She looked up into Wayland's eyes and said "It's done.""What happens now?" asked Wayland."We share some mead and I give you a bag of gold and a special gift. The gift is sky metal, which I saw fall to earth long ago. I thank you for your skill Wayland."" Thank you for allowing me to watch your skill, Valkyrie. And the sky metal is appreciated as much as the gift of knowing the Allfather's will. What's your name?" "Sigrdrífa" she answered. "Lovely. Do you take this to your would be hero now?"" Oh no. Now I throw it into the river to be found in a thousand years Gabriela: Thank you, Betsy. That was really extraordinary and totally caught me by surprise too. The end really caught me by surprise. I love so many things about it. Just so many things. Especially the tension. The tension to make something is there just through the elements, but the tension of those two talents coming together and meeting in this way and how that infused the sword into something even more powerful. I love that. Thank you.Sea: I also love the resistance Maybe I identify with the resistance. And of course, all of the descriptions were amazingly beautiful. Gabriela: I love how, in some way we can look at these as opposing forces or complicated relationships between powerful beings. Powerful people, at certain times, have to work together for greater purpose. Which shows such a high level of consciousness and responsibility and duty. Betsy: I was inspired, with the ending, by a real sword that was found, I think in the Thames, did have the entire runes carved into it. Having heard about that, I've always wondered how did it end there? What's the story of that sword? Gabriela: And today we find out. I think, any sword that ends up in the Lake for that many years, for hundreds, thousands of you know, or a thousand years is, is magic.Sea: I also love the idea that there's always something that we need to bow to the willingness to give over one's gifts. And there's something about wanting to show up and be in integrity. And do one's best while also negotiating what best is for others. Betsy: One thing I liked about this Valkyrie is that she just had a superb command of herself and maybe by reaping all these different warriors over the years or decades or hundreds of years, thousands of years who knows, she could talk to a powerful creature like Wayland, who's also known as Woland as well. And for those who maybe have heard of him that way, the long barrow actually exists, as does the white horse. And that long barrow is known as Wayland's Smithy.Sea: And what does her name mean?Betsy: Victory. Gabriela: Do you find yourself Betsy, resonating with Wayland or Woland, or with the Valkyrie herself or both in a particular way.Betsy: I think with both, I love the feel of, of Wayland being untrusting because of having been captured before, um, to be on the move. But I loved his going where the impulses took him for the creations. That there was just such a sense of things flowing through him. And while he put his great skill towards things, he let the forces move him around too. And so, as you were saying for him to then find himself in this tense situation, I felt like it was good for him. Sea: Yeah. It totally felt like it was good for him from listening. Yes. Betsy: Good. I'm glad to hear that. Gabriela: Well, it felt like it was a triumph for him to be seen, to be witnessed and to be unbound, but to be asked for his great work. So it feels like there's an element of liberation for him on some level, much needed healing and liberation. Sea: Well, it feels significantly more vulgar. I think he was also liberated from the chafing thing that he was experiencing against his own ego. Betsy: That feels true as well. Yeah. Well, thank you very much for listening. Sea: Thank you. Betsy: And now, Sea's story.Sea: I have no magic weapon to bring to council today. I'm not sure what I was thinking I was content, or at least I thought so, ruling over the community, the land. Standing on solid ground. The moment changed, that much is clear. I forgot myself, tripping over my own dream. That in itself is a forgetting. I'm not usually one for dreaming.It's my sister's department and she needs no help. I handle the waking world. I can only chalk it up to twilight. Or Dawn. It was both. A twilight that burst the day. So problem was in skipping the night, allowing myself to dream under the sun instead of the moon. I didn't intend to sit there. I went for counsel, guidance, but it wasn't there.No one was there. How hard could it be? I didn't think. And in the absence of thought, absence of intention, I climbed the steps and sat down. Beauty. So much beauty. As soon as I saw it, I thought I should stop, but I couldn't, it wasn't so much that I lacked will, as that some unconscious part of myself had will had willed itself into action. an action, I could not take back. There she was in all her glory. A goddess of the liminal. She danced between the realms. I didn't know her then. I only knew I wanted her. It was and was not shallow. Clearly she was beautiful, but it was more than that. She compelled me in ways I could not describe, as if some part of my psyche had manifested her. That is within my power. Perhaps unthinkingly I believed that it did. That she and I were a foregone conclusion. When I think of it, I feel stuck. I told my father and my friend, no, my not-a-friend, that I loved her. I didn't love her. I recognized her. They're different. N…

    Full show notes at the publisher

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