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Reflective Parenting Podcast by Curious Neuron — Kids & Family
Reflective Parenting Podcast by Curious Neuron

You don’t snap at your kids because you’re a bad parent. You snap because your stress builds faster than your awareness, and no one ever taught you how to handle that.

I’m Dr. Cindy Hovington, a mom of three with a doctorate in neuroscience and founder of Curious Neuron. I created The Reflective Parenting Podcast for parents who care deeply, know a lot, and still find themselves overwhelmed in the real moments.

This is not a podcast where I tell you how to be a perfect parent. I’m in it with you.

Each week, I invite you into my own reflections:

what I’m learning from scientific articles and books,

what I’m noticing in my nervous system and emotions,

and what real parents and experts teach me in conversation.

Together, we get curious about why we snap, shut down, or over-function in conflict, and what’s actually happening in our brain and body when we do. We talk about stress, shame, repair, boundaries, playfulness, and the quiet moments no one sees—so you can start to recognize your patterns and gently shift them.

By listening, you’ll learn to:

notice your stress and body signals earlier,

understand the lenses and stories that intensify hard moments,

regulate your nervous system when parenting feels like “too much”,

and handle conflict with more calm, clarity, and repair.

But more than that, you’ll have a companion in the work.

I’ll share where I struggle, what I’m practicing, and how I’m trying to grow, so you don’t feel like the only parent who finds this hard.

If you’re ready to move away from “perfect” parenting and toward reflective parenting—where every tough moment becomes data, not failure—pull up a chair.

Let’s learn, feel, and grow together.

Find out which book I will be covering next month:

https://curiousneuron.com/podcast/

Join the private group on Facebook:

www.facebook.com/groups/reflectiveparentingpodcast/

Start training your emotional awareness for FREE:

https://tremendous-hustler-7333.kit.com/84371dc0b2

Purchase my course The Emotionally Aware Parent.

https://curiousneuron.com/reflective-parent-club/

Follow us on Instagram @drcindyhovington or Facebook @curiousneuronparenting

Copyright: © 2024 Curious Neuron | Science of Parental Well-Being

Latest Episodes:

You don't have to re-create a "new you": focus on getting to know yourself instead Jun 24, 2024

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Constantly striving for an idealized version of yourself might not be as beneficial as it seems. Do you ever wonder if the endless pursuit of self-improvement is actually doing more harm than good? Join me, as I challenge the pervasive self-help culture that pressures us into relentless self-improvement. Inspired by an enlightening anecdote from Phil Knight's "Shoe Dog," I'll highlight the value of embracing our inherent traits and accepting our flaws. Discover how true self-acceptance can lead to healthier mindsets and better relationships, without the overwhelming pressure to be someone you're not.
In this episode, we'll also explore practical ways to reflect on self-improvement without feeling overwhelmed. Learn how simple tools, like using the word "because," can help you identify and understand the root causes of your stress. I'll share insights on making small, manageable improvements by recognizing your strengths and focusing on what you don't need to change. Plus, stay tuned for a sneak peek into our next episode where we'll dive into the intriguing world of lying and truth-telling with a researcher from McGill University. Don't forget to subscribe for more insightful discussions!
Join the waitlist for the Reflective Parent Club:
https://tremendous-hustler-7333.ck.page/5ab8a76664
Schedule a 20 min chat with me:
https://calendly.com/curious_neuron/chat-about-parenting-with-cindy

Support the show

Join the Reflective Parent Book Club for only $9.99 for the year: https://reflectiveparentclub.circle.so/checkout/reflective-parenting-book-club

Watch my Tedx Talk on YouTube called The Over-Educated, Emotionally Underprepared Parent: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nDYJFY_9K9E&t=19s

Grab my course for $99, The Emotionally Aware Parent: https://curiousneuron.com/reflective-parent-club/

The Power of Connection and Community for Dads with Chris Rodack Jun 17, 2024

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In this conversation, Chris discusses his personal journey of transformation and how he helps dads improve their lives. He shares his experience of going through phases of discipline and inconsistency, and how he reached a point of dissatisfaction that motivated him to make a change. Chris emphasizes the importance of connection and the power of a supportive community in helping dads overcome their struggles. He also addresses the challenges that arise in relationships when one partner is working on self-improvement while the other is not, and the need for open and effective communication in these situations. The conversation explores the importance of commitment in relationships and the impact of mental health on fathers. It emphasizes the need for self-care and personal growth, as well as breaking cycles of negative behavior. The role of community and support in improving mental well-being is highlighted.
Takeaways

Personal transformation requires discipline and consistency.
Connection and support from a community are crucial for overcoming struggles.
Open and effective communication is essential in relationships.
Friction and discomfort can lead to growth and positive change. Commitment in relationships requires saying yes or no forever, rather than questioning compatibility during arguments.
Focusing on discipline and physical well-being can lead to better overall well-being.
Self-care involves internal work and dialogue, not just external activities like going to the spa.
Breaking cycles of negative behavior requires self-reflection, journaling, therapy, and support from others.
Building a community of like-minded individuals can provide accountability and help in personal growth.

Support the show

Join the Reflective Parent Book Club for only $9.99 for the year: https://reflectiveparentclub.circle.so/checkout/reflective-parenting-book-club

Watch my Tedx Talk on YouTube called The Over-Educated, Emotionally Underprepared Parent: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nDYJFY_9K9E&t=19s

Grab my course for $99, The Emotionally Aware Parent: https://curiousneuron.com/reflective-parent-club/

Have you been feeling disconnected lately? Here are 3 tips to reconnect. Jun 10, 2024

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I just came back from a trip to Italy and there was a moment at a park where I realized something....we need to connect more with ourselves and those we love.
I polled our Instagram audience and 50% of parents feel disconnected and of these, 43% feel disconnected from their partners.
If you can relate to this, have a listen to this short solo episode.
You can also read the blog post I wrote about this and add a comment:
https://www.curiousneuron.com/blog/2024/6/8/are-we-too-busy-findings-ways-to-disconnect-from-our-kids-rather-than-moments-of-connection
If you want to join the waitlist for our upcoming community called the Reflective Parent Community this Fall, click the link below:
https://curiousneuronacademy.mykajabi.com/reflective-parenting-community-8751f762-a8f3-4562-b0e8-e37de4ab7187?preview_theme_id=2157310111
Purchase the Reflective Parent Journal below (get $10 off if you email me the review you leave for the podcast):
https://curiousneuronacademy.mykajabi.com/offers/FE2tgqG2/checkout
Thanks for listening!

Support the show

Join the Reflective Parent Book Club for only $9.99 for the year: https://reflectiveparentclub.circle.so/checkout/reflective-parenting-book-club

Watch my Tedx Talk on YouTube called The Over-Educated, Emotionally Underprepared Parent: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nDYJFY_9K9E&t=19s

Grab my course for $99, The Emotionally Aware Parent: https://curiousneuron.com/reflective-parent-club/

Generational Adversity and its Effects on the Gut Microbiome Jun 03, 2024

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In this conversation, Bridget Callaghan PhD, discusses her research on the gut-brain-microbiome connection and the impact of generational adversity. The study they conducted found that different forms of adversity were associated with unique signatures in the child's microbiome, and some of these microbes were associated with the emotional health of the children. In this conversation, Cindy and Bridget discuss the impact of early environments on children's gut health and microbiome. They explore the effects of COVID-19 lockdowns on children's gut composition and the importance of exposure to germs for developing a healthy microbiome. They also touch on the role of diet in gut health and the challenges of studying and interpreting scientific research. Bridget shares her hopes for future studies, including investigating the mechanisms by which gut microbes influence the brain and behavior. Overall, the conversation highlights the complexity of gut health and the need for a more nuanced understanding of its impact on overall well-being.

Early life experiences can have a significant impact on health across the lifespan, including physical and mental health.
The science of the gut-brain-microbiome connection is still evolving, and more research is needed to fully understand the mechanisms and potential interventions.
Parents should not worry excessively about the impact of their own experiences on their children, as there are many factors at play and individual outcomes can vary. Early environments, including exposure to germs and a diverse diet, play a crucial role in shaping children's gut health and microbiome.
COVID-19 lockdowns had an impact on the gut composition of children.
The Mediterranean diet is often associated with a healthy gut and overall well-being, but the research on diet and gut health is complex and ongoing.
Interpreting scientific research requires understanding that individual studies provide limited guidance for personal decisions, and that scientific knowledge evolves over time.

Support the show

Join the Reflective Parent Book Club for only $9.99 for the year: https://reflectiveparentclub.circle.so/checkout/reflective-parenting-book-club

Watch my Tedx Talk on YouTube called The Over-Educated, Emotionally Underprepared Parent: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nDYJFY_9K9E&t=19s

Grab my course for $99, The Emotionally Aware Parent: https://curiousneuron.com/reflective-parent-club/

Understanding the Challenges of Military Families May 27, 2024

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In this conversation, Cindy Hovington speaks with Matt Brown and Leah Blain about the experiences of military families and their children. The conversation highlights the need for awareness and understanding of the unique lifestyle of military families and the support they require. The goal of the conversation is to shed light on the experiences of military children and promote empathy and support for them. Military families face unique challenges, including frequent moves and deployments, which can have negative impacts on children's academic and social-emotional well-being. However, research shows that with proper support and resilience-building skills, children can thrive in these environments. Parents play a crucial role in helping their children adapt to new situations and develop the necessary skills. Preventative measures, such as teaching mindfulness and emotional regulation, can be effective in supporting military families' mental health. There is a need for better access to mental health support and resources for military families, as suicide rates among service members and veterans are alarmingly high.

The experiences of military children can vary, with some developing resilience and others struggling with the stress and changes.
Awareness and understanding of the military lifestyle are important for supporting military families.
Supportive communities and resources can help mitigate the challenges faced by military families and promote resilience. Frequent moves and deployments can negatively impact the academic and social-emotional well-being of children in military families.
With proper support and resilience-building skills, children can adapt and thrive in these environments.
Parents play a crucial role in helping their children navigate the challenges of military life.
Preventative measures, such as teaching mindfulness and emotional regulation, can support the mental health of military families.
There is a need for better access to mental health support and resources for military families, as suicide rates among service members and veterans are alarmingly high.

Military Family Clinic
Chimney Trail

Support the show

Join the Reflective Parent Book Club for only $9.99 for the year: https://reflectiveparentclub.circle.so/checkout/reflective-parenting-book-club

Watch my Tedx Talk on YouTube called The Over-Educated, Emotionally Underprepared Parent: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nDYJFY_9K9E&t=19s

Grab my course for $99, The Emotionally Aware Parent: https://curiousneuron.com/reflective-parent-club/

Exploring the Challenges and Solutions of Modern Parenting: Insights from Research May 20, 2024

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In this episode, Cindy Hovington interviews Kei Nomaguchi and Melissa Milkie about their research on parenthood and well-being. They discuss the concept of intensive parenting and the societal expectations placed on parents, particularly mothers. The conversation explores the pros and cons of intensive parenting and the challenges faced by parents in balancing work and family responsibilities. The need for workplace support and community connections is emphasized, as well as the importance of recognizing the rewards and meaningfulness of parenting. The episode concludes with a call for societal changes to better support parents and create a more balanced and fulfilling parenting experience. The conversation highlights the lack of support and resources for parents, the need for a proactive society, and the impact of supporting parents on children and society as a whole.

Takeaways

The US mental health system for parents is lacking in support and resources, leaving many individuals to struggle on their own.
A proactive approach to supporting parents is necessary, rather than waiting for symptoms of mental health issues to arise.
Supporting parents not only benefits the well-being of the parents themselves but also has a positive impact on their children and society as a whole.

Parenthood and Psychological Well-Being: Clarifying the Role of
Child Age and Parent-Child Relationship Quality
Parenthood and Well‐Being: A Decade in Review

Support the show

Join the Reflective Parent Book Club for only $9.99 for the year: https://reflectiveparentclub.circle.so/checkout/reflective-parenting-book-club

Watch my Tedx Talk on YouTube called The Over-Educated, Emotionally Underprepared Parent: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nDYJFY_9K9E&t=19s

Grab my course for $99, The Emotionally Aware Parent: https://curiousneuron.com/reflective-parent-club/

The Science of Well-being: Insights on Happiness and Workplace Wellness May 13, 2024

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In this conversation, Jacqueline discusses the application of the science of wellbeing in daily life. She shares her personal journey of implementing wellbeing practices and emphasizes the importance of vulnerability and self-reflection. The conversation explores misconceptions about happiness and the role of circumstances in our overall wellbeing. Jacqueline also highlights the significance of understanding and embracing different perspectives on happiness. The conversation delves into redefining success and shifting career paths, as well as the importance of acts of kindness and overcoming the 'What the Hell' effect. The discussion concludes with practical steps for parents to nurture their wellbeing and the need for supportive work environments.
Takeaways

Wellbeing is a holistic concept that encompasses physical, mental, and emotional health.
Taking care of one's physical health through exercise, nutrition, and sleep is crucial for overall wellbeing.
Mental wellbeing involves managing stress, practicing mindfulness, and seeking support when needed.
Emotional wellbeing is about understanding and expressing emotions in a healthy way.
Prioritizing self-care and making time for activities that bring joy and relaxation is essential for wellbeing.

Support the show

Join the Reflective Parent Book Club for only $9.99 for the year: https://reflectiveparentclub.circle.so/checkout/reflective-parenting-book-club

Watch my Tedx Talk on YouTube called The Over-Educated, Emotionally Underprepared Parent: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nDYJFY_9K9E&t=19s

Grab my course for $99, The Emotionally Aware Parent: https://curiousneuron.com/reflective-parent-club/

Everything you need to know before, during and after a divorce to support your child with Dr. Tamara Soles May 06, 2024

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As a child of divorce, I know that it can be very difficult to go through. I have been getting lots of emails around this and so I asked my dear friend Dr. Tamara Soles to join me today.
We break down divorce into before, during and after so that you have all the tips and advice you need to navigate this in a way that is best for you and your child.
We discuss arguing in front of your child, what repair looks like, how to talk to your kids and how to co-parent.
Don't miss this!
Join me this Wednesday at 12:00pm ET for a FREE webinar called Reflective Parenting: Learning How to Shift Perspectives and Reduce Your Stress
with the Amazing Dr. Michele Kambolis.
Register below:
https://curiousneuronacademy.mykajabi.com/registration-page-e1684acc-7aa3-47df-aada-d96f5a570e8e
Follow Dr. Soles:
https://drtamarasoles.com/
https://www.instagram.com/drtamarasoles/

Support the show

Join the Reflective Parent Book Club for only $9.99 for the year: https://reflectiveparentclub.circle.so/checkout/reflective-parenting-book-club

Watch my Tedx Talk on YouTube called The Over-Educated, Emotionally Underprepared Parent: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nDYJFY_9K9E&t=19s

Grab my course for $99, The Emotionally Aware Parent: https://curiousneuron.com/reflective-parent-club/

Why we need to stop normalizing postpartum mental health issues with Dr. Tina Montreuil Apr 29, 2024

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Navigating the tender complexities of mental health as a parent can often feel like a solitary journey, but it doesn't have to be. Nathalie shares candidly from the heart about her postpartum experiences, while Dr. Tina Montreuil of McGill University blends these personal narratives with academic insights. Together, we unravel the challenges and celebrate the resilience of birthing parents, marking World Maternal Mental Health Day as a beacon of support and solidarity.
In the warm embrace of this episode, we create a safe space where the intricate dance of psychological and physiological changes in parenthood is not just acknowledged, but deeply understood. We delve into the critical role of self-care for mothers, often overshadowed by the baby's needs, and how midwifery and culturally sensitive care can lighten the load. The transformative power of empathy, the necessity of accessible mental health tools, and the importance of self-compassion stitch together a narrative that advocates for a holistic approach to parental well-being.
We round out our conversation with a contemplation of the barriers that many new parents face when seeking mental health support, emphasizing the urgency of action before reaching a crisis point. Our dialogue calls for an empowered community, where parents feel seen, heard, and cared for, and where reaching out for help is seen not as a weakness but as an act of profound love and caring. Thank you again to Nathalie and Dr. Montreuil for their vulnerability and expertise, and to you, our listeners, for joining us on this journey to foster kinder, more compassionate parenting experiences.
Livre Blanc
Quebec Alliance for Perinatal Mental Health
Réseau des Centres de ressources périnatales du Québec
Episode with Kristen Neff: Apple Podcast or Spotify

Support the show

Join the Reflective Parent Book Club for only $9.99 for the year: https://reflectiveparentclub.circle.so/checkout/reflective-parenting-book-club

Watch my Tedx Talk on YouTube called The Over-Educated, Emotionally Underprepared Parent: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nDYJFY_9K9E&t=19s

Grab my course for $99, The Emotionally Aware Parent: https://curiousneuron.com/reflective-parent-club/

What to do when you keep saying "I don't have time for myself" Apr 22, 2024

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Hello my dear friend,
I get it, I have said this over and over myself. However, today, I would like you to take a step back and really reflect on this thought "I don't have time for myself".
I walk you through some reflection prompts and how you can view this problem a little differently and work through it.
Making time for yourself doesn't need to be 2 hours every day. It is a little moment of connection, a little moment that reminds you that you are important.
Don't skip this activity this week, take a moment to reflect on what your needs are and how you can start making space for them. You matter, lease don't forget that my dear friend.
I hope you have a beautiful and lovely week,
Cindy
Join me in Palo Alto, California on April 25th:
https://drive.google.com/file/d/1HTkrj7MDep1vmoGhmTQj0jTMSFLPEgl6/view?usp=sharing
Purchase my Reflective Parent Journal:
https://curiousneuronacademy.mykajabi.com/offers/FE2tgqG2/checkout
Ask a question for an upcoming podcast episode:
https://docs.google.com/forms/d/1p6fgHV-jLaPd1xS0uDECv2BPlcfvfizq51EGyOumUnY/edit

Support the show

Join the Reflective Parent Book Club for only $9.99 for the year: https://reflectiveparentclub.circle.so/checkout/reflective-parenting-book-club

Watch my Tedx Talk on YouTube called The Over-Educated, Emotionally Underprepared Parent: https://www.youtube.com/watch?v=nDYJFY_9K9E&t=19s

Grab my course for $99, The Emotionally Aware Parent: https://curiousneuron.com/reflective-parent-club/

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