Real Recovery Talk

198 - Addicted to Meth - Devin shares his story Nov 25, 2021

“Addiction is so big in our society right now that it’s best that you let loved ones know that they can have help. They can receive help, and they can do this. It doesn’t have to kill them.” -Devin

Today, Ben and I chatted with Devin, who’s an example of getting back on track. He began drug usage during childhood, and found himself in prison later. Devin gathered the strength to face himself and the beast within. He doesn’t do it alone, but with the help of the people around him. Listen in as he talks about using drugs to feel a void, getting back on track after a relapse, and how families can help their loved ones through treatment.

Too Much Time on His Hands

Isolation created a gap in Devin’s childhood of growing up in Atlanta, GA. He raised himself since 5th grade while his family was busy with work and life. His family’s absence made him yearn to be noticed. Devin felt lost despite knowing his family was working to give him a better life, especially his father.

Devin smoked his first joint around the age of 13. As he experimented with different substances and alcohol, it progressed into something he wanted to do every day. Devin thought the drugs and alcohol changed the way he felt. Besides that, he had a lot of time on his hands, and a gap in his life to fill.

Devin tried Xanax at 15, and then Cocaine at 18. All his experimenting led him to using Meth at age 20. He lived with this addiction, even while in prison. After prison, he felt the urge to change his relationship with substances.

Family and friends became a major inspiration for Devin receiving guidance about treatment, and even helping him get back on track after a relapse. Devin managed the beast within by refusing to give up on himself.

A Message to Families and Friends

Since family and a supportive community played a role in Devin’s treatment, he encourages other families about their role in a loved one’s recovery journey. Structure and accountability are needed in recovering and maintaining sobriety. Devin mentions the small routines, like making his bed, that helps him along the way. With the belief from himself and people around him, Devin is able to keep getting back on track day by day.

Check out our website, where you can download episodes with helpful information for those in recovery and their families. Share this podcast with a friend and leave us a review!

Show Highlights

[02:12] - How early did Devin start experimenting with substances

[05:07] - Isolation can influence substance abuse

[08:46] - What did Devin’s aunt say to him to help him get treatment

[12:13] - A relapse occurs when he thinks he has his drug usage under control

[18:30] - What was Devin’s mindset when he restarted his program against drug usage

[21:24] - Here are steps to support loved ones through treatment

Episode Links and Resources

Find out more about Al-Anon and how this resource can support your family

Ideas for a show? Email us tom@realrecoverytalk.com and ben@realrecoverytalk.com

Podcast editing and show notes by Pro Podcast Solutions

197 - Getting Hooked On (and Off) Drugs and Drink Nov 19, 2021

“I have a purpose today, and I feel God steps in my life a lot and he was telling me to have courage and be fearless.” -Ira

Today, Ben and I chatted with Ira, who’s a real deal addict. He’s had a ton of health issues like cancer, diabetes, and even facing death as a result of his drug and alcohol addiction. But he managed to turn his life around and now he’s going on two years sober! Listen in as he talks about getting addicted, how he overcame it, and all the people who helped save his life along the way.

Struggling to Find His Place

Growing up in the 70s as half Irish and half Vietnamese, Ira felt like he never fit in anywhere. He went through some verbal and physical abuse at an early age.

In seventh grade at age 13, he picked up his first beer and smoked dope for the first time. By age 15, he was an IV drug user and hooked on cocaine and opiates. Then he dropped out of high school with only a 9th-grade education and eventually became a convicted felon in Pennsylvania, New Jersey, and Florida.

Years after his father passed away from cirrhosis, Ira turned to heavy drinking. “I drank alcoholically because I was searching for the high from dope and pills or whatever it may be, and I wasn’t getting it.”

This led to frequent illness and hospital visits that did nothing to help his addiction... until a pivotal low point marked the real beginning of his turbulent recovery.

Helping Others in Recovery

After a lot of pain and uncertainty about where his life was headed, Ira has taken up a mantle that not many sober people choose. He shares his story in hopes of helping others recover from their addictions. Through his own experience of 35 years and newfound faith, he meets great people in places like hospitals, treatment centers, and psyche wards. Ira knows the importance of having a supportive person or group on the road to sobriety.

Check out our website, where you can download episodes with helpful information for those in recovery and their families. Share this podcast with a friend and leave us a review!

Show Highlights

[05:26] What made Ira swear off heavy drinking for 13 years

[07:26] How he got high on alcohol and drugs at the same time

[10:49] Frequent hospital visits as an easy way to get a fix

[14:11] Why the substance of choice plays a minor part in addiction overall

[18:46] Ira’s downturn before the turnaround

[29:36] An intervention that led to him getting treatment for his health problems

[40:04] The place and the meeting that ended up saving his life

[46:58] How the last few months of Ira’s life have changed

Episode Links and Resources

Find out more about Al-Anon and how this resource can support your family

Ideas for a show? Email us tom@realrecoverytalk.com and ben@realrecoverytalk.com

Podcast editing and show notes by Pro Podcast Solutions

196 - Starting an Addiction During College Nov 04, 2021

“I have a place that I was comfortable with that I was already a part of for my recovery.” -Reed

Today, Ben and I chatted with Reed, who tells his story about how his addiction started in college. Raised locally in Palm Beach Gardens, Reed had a good life growing up with loving parents who gave him many opportunities in life. However, with his parents being conservative regarding drinking, Reed didn’t get drugs and alcohol from his parents.

Experimenting with Drugs

While in high school, Reed did drink and smoke weed, but drugs and alcohol weren’t a big problem at this point in his life. However, when he went to the University of Mississippi, he started to heavily get into drugs and alcohol. In his second year at university, his roommate sold multiple forms of hard drugs.

With easy access to drugs and alcohol, it was easy for Reed to become addicted to his personality. “That opened the door of my first year of solid, heavy drug use.” When his house was raided by the DEA, and his roommate passed away from an overdose, Reed was charged, went to jail, and left school.

Talking to Your Kids About Drugs and Alcohol

Reed agrees with us when we talk about being overly strict with your kids about drugs and alcohol, especially in teen years. Instead of telling them not to do anything, be open and frank with your children and have discussions with them about the adverse effects of drugs and alcohol.

When kids aren’t allowed to do anything and have a very restrictive home life, they will generally go out and start to party hard out of control because they were too sheltered in high school.

Check out our website, where you can download episodes with helpful information for those in recovery and their families. Share this podcast with a friend and leave us a review!

Show Highlights

[06:04] Starting by experimenting with drugs and alcohol during his high school years.

[09:48] Reed’s progression from college drinking and drugs to DEA raids.

[21:27] Why being a helicopter parent can persuade your kids to do drugs.

[32:19] Entering into his first treatment program.

[41:27] Needing a geographical change depends on your home life.

[50:11] We discuss the pros and cons of methadone.

[57:46] Speaking to other through AA to educate college students on drugs and alcohol.

Episode Links and Resources

Find out more about Al-Anon and how this resource can support your family

Ideas for a show? Email us tom@realrecoverytalk.com and ben@realrecoverytalk.com

Podcast editing and show notes by Pro Podcast Solutions

195 - Healing Trauma to Break Free From Addiction Oct 28, 2021

“Life continues to show up, whether you want to be a part of it or not.” -Natalie

Today, Ben and I chatted with Natalie, who endured horrible abuse as a small girl that gave her immense amounts of childhood trauma that ended up turning into a drug and alcohol addiction as a teen. Listen in to discover how Natalie overcame her addiction by healing her emotional wounds as an adult.

Her Early Years Traumatized as a Child

At the age of eight, Natalie was sexually molested and started drinking at the age of 14. As her disease progressed, she started using Zanax and was arrested at 17 and put on probation.

She couldn’t trust anyone by the age of 10 and didn’t know who she was or what to do in her daily life. Natalie felt a constant challenge of wanting to be the best and fitting in with other kids her age.

In college, Natalie became addicted to oxycontin, robbed her neighbor’s home, and was picked up and put in jail for 14 days. Her father wouldn’t bail her out, and she was considered the black sheep of her family. Shortly after her jail sentence, Natalie moved to Canada and started selling herself for sex to keep up with her drug addiction.

Learning to Utilize Her AA Tools to Heal

Surrendering is Natalie’s lifeline to healing. “Everyday you need to surrender yourself.” Natalie understands the importance of having a good, reliable support group, such as the people she’s found at Rock Recovery Center.

Check out our website, where you can download episodes with helpful information for those in recovery and their families. Share this podcast with a friend and leave us a review!

Show Highlights

[02:32] Natalie talks about her past history growing up in a family of six children.

[07:22] Using the white chip to surrender yourself so you can heal.

[12:53] How surrendering leads to recovery for addicts.

[17:48] Utilizing sobriety in the form of having clean people around you to help you change your lifestyle.

[22:49] Moving from one addiction to another because you need the high to survive.

[33:07] How Natalie’s life has changed since she started her recovery.

[45:00] What she is doing to continue her recovery into sobriety.

Episode Links and Resources

Find out more about Al-Anon and how this resource can support your family

Ideas for a show? Email us tom@realrecoverytalk.com and ben@realrecoverytalk.com

Podcast editing and show notes by Pro Podcast Solutions

193 - Vince has been to 10+ treatment centers - What will be different this time? Oct 14, 2021

In today's episode, Ben and I talk with Vince, a 25-year-old recovering addict from Philadelphia. He stole a bottle of vodka and drank the entire bottle in sixth grade. In the summer of his freshman year of high school, Vince started smoking pot. Cocaine became a weekend sports celebration during his junior year of high school. Vince became an addict after his team coach gave him a prescription narcotic drug in his second college year.

Vince was involved in sports as early as he could remember. His family consisted of three sisters, one of the older and two of them younger than him. Both of his parents were supportive of him and good, hard-working people. "Growing up, I was instilled with morals and values." He was brought up to respect elders, women, and to have good social manners.

"I remember going to this fight in third grade. Everybody started cursing and fighting. Immediately after that, I said my first curse word, then I went home and started watching fighting videos." He isn't sure if this one incident brought him down a negative road, but his life was very different after this experience. The next year in fourth grade, he ended up getting kicked out of school for fighting. "I was fighting and cursing and doing things kids that age shouldn't be doing."

He felt a purpose playing sports as he was always asked to play with the older kids in the next league up. "Everything on the outside just mattered so much, and I thought that was who I was. I thought that I was based on all external things." However, if anything went wrong, he immediately turned to anger and aggression, which he remembers his father modeling for him at an early age.

His school discipline record was horrible. However, the school let him slide because of his athletic abilities. Vince remembers not having any consequences for fighting during his high school years. This enabled him to continue this behavior, along with smoking pot with his friends.

Listen in as Vince tells his story of how he lost his scholarship to Rutgers, what happened when he became addicted to opiate drugs, and his multiple attempts at getting sober.

At Rock Recovery Center, we take a humanistic approach to recovery, teaching our clients how to live independently in a sober world. We care about the success and safety of each and every one of our clients from the moment they step into our center to the future of their well-being.

Check out my new website where you can download any episode right from my site along with other useful information for those in recovery.

Share this podcast with a friend and leave us a review!

Show Notes:

[03:09] Vince talks about his past experiences growing up in Philadelphia.
[07:11] His first experience drinking in sixth grade.
[13:33] Social acceptance and drug culture.
[15:21] Personal identity associated with career for men.
[18:25] Vince had his first experience with opiate drugs his senior year in high school.
[19:45] He started stealing from his family to buy more opiate drugs.
[25:11] The “Florida Shuffle” moving on from the treatment facility to another facility.
[28:40] Ben talks about the incredible recovery culture in Florida.
[33:10] Why Vince having his daughter wasn’t enough to keep him sober.
[37:01] Sobriety and addiction and how these two can easily interchange.
[40:13] What is different for Vince in this recovery process?
[43:42] His biggest fears for the recovery process.
[45:27] Vince’s spiritual AA experience.

Episode Links and Resources

Real Recovery Live Chat
Real Recovery Talk on the Web
Real Recovery Talk on YouTube
Leave Real Recovery Talk a review on iTunes
Rock Recovery Center
Real Recovery Talk on Facebook
Ideas for a show? Email us tom@realrecoverytalk.com and ben@realrecoverytalk.com
Podcast editing and show notes by Pro Podcast Solutions

192 - Growing up in Manhattan- Selling drugs and living a lifestyle of destruction- Tom Fabricitore shares his story Oct 07, 2021

“What alcohol was doing for me outlaid what it was doing to me.” --Tom

Today, Ben and I are talking to Tom, who works in the recovery field. Born and raised in downtown Manhattan, he became a drug dealer and eventually became sober from drugs and alcohol. He has been on the road to recovery for the past seven years.

Starting the Drinking Habit at Age 10

Born and raised in New York City, Tom grew up in abusive family life, reflected in his poor behavior at school. Feeling like something was missing in his life, he discovered that alcohol filled that void at 10. From the beginning, Tom drank too much and didn’t know how to stop drinking as he was trying to impress the older adults who surrounded him. He was so obsessed with drinking and doing drugs that he had to stay an extra year in high school to finish up the credits that he missed from his addiction during the school year.

Falling into Becoming a Drug Dealer

Since many of his friends ended up selling weed in high school, Tom decided to go the same route as college wasn’t even on his radar. “I had a big retail business with guys delivering for me. I was a career pot dealer.” Although he knew he was living a lie as a drug dealer, the thought of becoming clean was scary because Tom realized if he left dealing drugs and his lifestyle that he would have to grow up and become responsible.

Check out our website where you can download episodes with helpful information for those in recovery and their families. Share this podcast with a friend and leave us a review!

Show Notes:

[02:05] Tom’s early years and how he became addicted to alcohol.

[04:22] How New York and growing up in a fast-paced environment impacted Tom’s addiction.

[10:32] His circle of friends in high school was drug dealers selling weed.

[14:00] The thought of getting sober was scary for Tom because he realized he would need to grow up.

[16:55] The first time he decided to stop being an addict was on 9-11.

[18:33] Discovering opiate drugs and how Tom thought he would be OK with opiates.

[21:44] Adding cocaine to his alcohol and opiate drug addiction.

[26:29] First time Tom experience hope in his life to get off of drugs and alcohol.

[35:14] The point at which Tom stopped making excuses in his life.

[40:16] Surrendering and how this affected his healing journey to recovering.

Episode Links and Resources

Find out more about Al-Anon and how this resource can support your family

Ideas for a show? Email us tom@realrecoverytalk.com and ben@realrecoverytalk.com

Podcast editing and show notes by Pro Podcast Solutions

191 - Al Dutzik- The Real Deal Alcoholic- The importance of community and benefits of Sober Living Sep 30, 2021

“’Alcohol was the substance I just could not go without - I felt safe with alcohol.” -Al

Today, Ben and I are talking to Al, a native of Pittsburgh, who is sharing with us today his journey and what he did to become sober. He talks with us about Foundations - a program that provides housing for men moving through their journey of sobriety.

His First Experiences with Alcohol

At the age of 16, Al found a bottle of homemade wine in the basement of his home and decided to try it. When he drank, Al noticed that he didn’t feel embarrassment, a common emotion he would have in public. “It seemed that alcohol was a solution for me, I didn’t realize the hell that was in for me with alcohol.” Although he wasn’t aware of becoming an alcoholic, this was the start down the path to addiction.

Alcoholic’s Perspective on Drinking

“I thought that everyone drank to feel good,” says Al. He didn’t recognize that there was a social aspect to drinking. Today, Al acknowledges that you need to be OK with your strengths and weaknesses and that having good self-esteem and self-worth is a key component to completely recover from an addictive state.

When he talks about his addiction, Al says that his wheels fell off when the alcohol “didn’t work anymore.” At this point, there wasn’t an amount of alcohol that he could drink that didn’t make him sick. However, he didn’t know how to or who to ask for help.

Today, Al is grateful that he doesn’t have to use alcohol to feel good. “It’s incredible to not have that chemical holding me hostage all day!” Now, he learns about himself daily and seeks out meaningful relationships with others.

Check out our website where you can download episodes with helpful information for those in recovery and their families. Share this podcast with a friend and leave us a review!

Show Notes:

[03:15] Al’s experience with alcohol and growing up with an alcoholic father.

[07:04] The emotional void that alcohol fills.

[10:08] Starting to drink in the morning to avoid feeling hungover.

[17:56] The wheels fall off when the alcohol doesn’t work to solve your problems.

[20:01] How he decided to go into rehab and who helped him get there.

[24:58] Going into recovery simplified Al’s life in a very profound way.

[30:39] His first conference call with an addiction counselor.

[34:34] Be willing to take suggestions from others to help you on the road to recovery.

[39:33] What AA is all about and how you can use AA to recover.

[43:48] Giving up alcohol gave Al his entire life back.

Episode Links and Resources

Find out more about Al-Anon and how this resource can support your family

Ideas for a show? Email us tom@realrecoverytalk.com and ben@realrecoverytalk.com

Podcast editing and show notes by Pro Podcast Solutions

190 - The First 30 Days of Treatment Sep 23, 2021

Here we are with Real Recovery Talk! Do you know someone who is considering going to a treatment facility for up to 30 days? Today, I’m going to talk about how you most likely won’t be cured by going to treatment for 30 days. There are a few people who have been successful after just 30 days; however, they are few and far between.

The first day of treatment consists of detox, which generally ranges from day one to day seven. Detox can vary from one to fourteen days, depending on the individual and specific variables. Variables that can affect the length of detox are the types of drugs you are using, how long you are using drugs, the vehicle of use of drugs. For example, are you using drugs IV, orally? Similar variables apply to alcohol, with some additional factors such as drinking alone or with others.

A detox facility is a safe place where you can get meals, medical attention, and be in a safe environment when you detox. During this time, your body will start to repair the damage inflicted by drugs and alcohol. From this point, you can now transfer to a residential facility where you will be day and night for treatment.

You may have a behavioral technician keeping tabs on you every 15 minutes when you join the residential treatment program. This part of the team makes sure everyone is safe and comfortable. They also ensure that you are getting to your programs, meetings, and medical appointments on time. This period is known as a “drying out period.”

Therapy is still minimal, as you are usually not yet ready to start treatment. At this stage, you’re detoxed and are moving toward creating a support group, getting to know your peers, and your therapist.

Next, you’ll need to figure out your personal triggers. What are your triggers? Are there specific environments in which your triggers are set off? Have you developed tools in your toolbox to deal with these triggers and to keep your calm in anxious situations? Have you considered your role or your family dynamics when dealing with triggers and healing from addiction?

Listen in to find out why the first thirty days of recovery only scratch the surface. Understand why recovery is a process in which each individual needs to move through at their own pace. Learn why you’ll need to continue healing and be consistent to work through previous trauma and have a successful recovery.

Check out my new website where you can download any episode right from my site along with other useful information for those in recovery. Look for our new daily shows, which are five minutes or under! Listen in for yourself or for a friend. You can also find our new short episodes on our Facebook page.

Share this podcast with a friend and leave us a review!

Show Notes:

[05:48] What the first seven days of treatment will most likely be for an addict in recovery.

[06:05] Variables which affect the length and severity of detox.

[09:28] The next phase of your healing: moving to a residential facility.

[12:24] You may have spent multiple years becoming an addict, you will most likely spend months if not years to recover to the point of not falling back to your addiction.

[14:41] Have you identified your triggers? If so, what are coping skills you are using to calm your reaction to your triggers?

[16:48] An example of what shouldn’t happen when you come in for recovery.

[19:42] We work with clients for three to four months on a continual basis to continue their recovery process.

Links and Resources:

Ideas for a show? Email us tom@realrecoverytalk.com and ben@realrecoverytalk.com

189 - Perry - Struggles with KRATOM and the anxieties that surrounds it Sep 16, 2021

“Kratom feels like an opiate, you get strong feelings similar to opiates.’” -Perry

Today, Ben and I are talking to Perry, a 24-year-old from Maryland and started smoking marijuana at age 16. He lost everything that he owned and had to drug and alcohol abuse in a short period of time. We talk with Perry about his experience with Kratom and how it negatively affected his life.

Kratom and Kava

Kratom is sourced from an Asian variety of pine trees and works the same as an opiate drug in your body. Kratom is addictive and you easily get hooked. Kava is a root herb from the Polynesian islands that is not addictive and is mostly used by people for relaxation and sleep. In many states, Kratom is illegal because of its addictive side effects. In low doses, Kratom is a stimulant. In higher doses, it’s a sedative.

Perry’s Experience with Kratom

After taking Kratom, Perry quickly realized that this legal street drug has very similar physical and mental effects to opiate drugs. He thought he had found the answer to his addiction issue and felt he would be able to continually use Kratom without negative side effects. What he soon learned is that he could build tolerance and that Kratom has the same effect as addictive drugs.

Check out our website where you can download episodes with helpful information for those in recovery and their families. Share this podcast with a friend and leave us a review!

Show Notes:

[01:33] Perry talks about his backstory and history of addiction.

[04:11] How he became interested and addicted to psychedelic drugs.

[06:55] Social aspect of doing drugs and participating in raves.

[11:47] Ben talks about what Kratom is and why it’s a bad choice to get off of drugs.

[14:44] The first time Perry tried Kratom and how he became addicted to this drug.

[22:09] How Perry decided to get back on Kratom after he was clean for a year.

[31:57] Different phases of Kratom use when taking it daily.

[36:07] Life became unmanageable once he was addicted to Kratom.

[41:57] How Perry decided to get off Kratom and his plan for his future.

Episode Links and Resources

Find out more about Al-Anon and how this resource can support your family

Ideas for a show? Email us tom@realrecoverytalk.com and ben@realrecoverytalk.com

Podcast editing and show notes by Pro Podcast Solutions

188 - Ken B - 35 retired from the Army, discusses his alcoholism and addiction throughout his life and ultimately where it led him Sep 09, 2021

“You couple substance abuse with PTSD and I’m wondering, ‘How do I fit in?’” -Ken

Today, Ben and I are talking to Ken, a 35-year active military combat-in-arms, now veteran, discussing his alcoholism and addiction and what his post-military recovery journey has been for Ken. He is now paying it forward, helping others recover from their addiction.

Ken’s Background

Born in 1964 to an Irish-Catholic family and the youngest of seven, the first memory of drinking alcohol is at age eight. With an abusive family environment, and alcohol readily available, Ken needed an escape.

As a child, his escape was sports until he started drinking hard in 7th grade. He met up with a guitar player in his teens and started a band. After that, he skipped most of high school until he was thrown out of school at 16. He remembers trying everything except for heroin.

“We knew the path we were on and decided that we can’t keep on this path, so we joined the service.” Having enrolled in the military in 1981, he saw much of the similar trauma he grew up with, such as suicides, fighting, and seeing a lot of blood, were familiar sites to Ken.

The Military and Drugs and Alcohol

Ken remembers how alcohol was a part of daily life in the military. “This is normal, this is the way we operate.” He remembers the monthly keg in the breakroom and the keg in addition to alcohol troops brought to the barracks, there was “alcohol in mass quantities.” He also recalls that the military didn’t have the same policy regarding drugs as they would “disappear.”

Once he left the army, it was hard to integrate into society with a different language, no one to give orders, and a different lifestyle. So when he re-entered the civilian world, his life slowed down exponentially.

Check out our website where you can download any episode along with helpful information for those in recovery and the families of those in recovery.

Share this podcast with a friend and leave us a review!

Show Notes:

[06:20] Ken talks about the parallels between his childhood and the military.

[07:38] He discusses how drinking was embedded into the military back in the 80s and 90s.

[10:01] Ken recalls his experience in Iraq on a specific “crazy” mission.

[13:25] Why many men in the company used heroin as their drug of choice in the military.

[16:10] How the military and his marriage kept him busy enough that he drank less.

[21:17] Having the root of his moral compass grounded in God.

[22:52] Ken describes the series of events leading him up to his successful recovery at Rock Recovery Center.

[31:59] The seven points of rehabilitation he took on his journey to recovery.

[50:23] Where Ken is going from here and what his future looks like.

Episode Links and Resources

Find out more about Al-Anon and how this resource can support your family

Ideas for a show? Email us tom@realrecoverytalk.com and ben@realrecoverytalk.com

Podcast editing and show notes by Pro Podcast Solutions

187 - 5 advantages to sobriety that we didn't see coming Sep 02, 2021

“I can’t even put into words how tight-knit a community that we’re a part of.” -Ben

Today, Ben and I will cover the top five unexpected benefits that have come about because of our sobriety. These positive side effects are items that naturally and organically happen through the process of sobriety. But, of course, these come with time and work on ourselves, along with setting goals.

Original Thoughts On Sobriety

Initially, I thought that I would spend 45 days in a sober rehab facility, then go back to Pennsylvania and spend time drinking beer with my buddies. As developments happened over time, I realized that I couldn’t fully comprehend the life I could potentially have for myself. Ben was living in a false reality. From his perspective, every person drank alcohol and did drugs, and that some people have figured out a way to moderate their addiction.

Surrounding Yourself with Other Alcoholic and Drug Addicts

I surrounded myself with alcohol and drug addicts while living an addiction lifestyle. I thought that they were true friends, but I realized everything that we did revolve around alcohol. There wasn’t a gathering that I attended that didn’t consist of massive amounts of alcohol. So when my friends started changing, and I changed friends, my life started moving in the right direction. You can tell who wants to be sober and do the work to get better, and while in treatment, I surrounded myself with that crowd.

What AA and NA Has to Offer

Not only do AA and NA offer drug and alcohol recovery, but they also offer so much more! One of our clients attending AA wasn’t into the work to achieve the 12 steps. In conversation with him, I mentioned the amount of professional networking at meetings, which can potentially build his business. There are many opportunities outside of sobriety when you build trust in relationships during sessions. We encourage our clients to participate and share with others so that the community can get to know them better.

Change of Hobbies with Sobriety

Golfing, bowling, and archery were all activities that I used to participate in while drinking. It took me some time and effort to realize that I could again do these activities without having alcohol involved. Ben had re-tuned his life and activities and is now better at the hobbies that he enjoyed when he was an addict. Not only is his skill set increased, but he enjoys his hobbies much more now that he is sober.

Check out our website where you can download any episode along with helpful information for those in recovery and the families of those in recovery.

Share this podcast with a friend and leave us a review!

Show Notes:

[02:51] Ben’s benefits from sobriety that he didn’t expect.

[05:00] Ben thought that every person was an addict when he was addicted.

[07:50] I talk about how my friends’ circle changed when I became sober.

[11:01] How addicts typically view the AA program when they first get into recovery.

[17:15] Using the sober community to support yourself during recovery.

[18:17] Finding and participating in new hobbies and activities sober.

[21:54] Ben explains how much time he wasted on drugs and alcohol.

[25:32] How I spent all my money before I earned my money.

[30:00] Ben talks about his financial insecurities when he entered sobriety.

[35:12] Hiding alcohol and drugs and learning to cope with reality without the addiction.

[42:38] The importance of filling your spirit when recovering.

Episode Links and Resources

Find out more about Al-Anon and how this resource can support your family

Ideas for a show? Email us tom@realrecoverytalk.com and ben@realrecoverytalk.com

Podcast editing and show notes by Pro Podcast Solutions

186 - Cody W - His successes, finance and all things money and how it can impact our sobriety Aug 26, 2021

“You have choices in what you do with your time, and that’s up to the individual.” -Cody

Today, Ben and I are chatting with Cody, who was very successful in life, and then addiction took it all away. Listen in to find out how he is rebuilding his life as a sober member of society and how drugs and alcohol can create alternative negative behaviors that aren’t a part of who you really are.

Growing Up with Learning Disabilities

Cody had multiple learning disabilities in grade school growing up. Because of his learning disabilities and not getting support in the school system, Cody couldn’t make good grades. He wanted to play sports but could not get on a team because of his low marks in school. He quickly learned that smoking pot was a solution to lessen his school anxiety and found that it helped him in school.

Using Drugs in High School

When he entered high school, Cody continued to use drugs. In addition, he also decided to make an income selling drugs. At one point, he was making a better income than his mom during his high school years.

Going to Prison for Drugs

Cody ended up in prison for violence, acting under the influence of drugs and alcohol from the age of 17 to 21. While in prison, another inmate introduced him to AA meetings. Even though he was in prison, Cody was able to easily access drugs and alcohol through the microeconomy of the prison.

Success and Addiction

With his first success at age 21 creating an app, he was bringing in good money. However, since he was an addict, Cody says, “being an addict gave me no respect for the scenario, and I needed drugs and alcohol as the highlight of the situation. Drugs and alcohol always came first in my life.”

Check out our website where you can download any episode along with helpful information for those in recovery and the families of those in recovery.

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Show Notes:

[03:00] Cody talks about his drug and alcohol use starting at an early age.

[04:16] Ramping up from using drugs to distributing drugs.

[07:32] Attending his first AA meeting in prison at the age of 19.

[12:34] Differences between jail and prison.

[17:37] Why drugs and alcohol make you violent.

[21:58] How addiction can take down the most successful people.

[30:01] Philanthropy in addiction and recovery.

[36:45] Reflecting on his previous decade of life and figuring out what he needs to do to make amends.

[44:11] Negotiating and figuring out how to get money when you’re an addict.

[47:34] Building blocks needed for an addict to recover their life.

Episode Links and Resources

Find out more about Al-Anon and how this resource can support your family

Ideas for a show? Email us tom@realrecoverytalk.com and ben@realrecoverytalk.com

Podcast editing and show notes by Pro Podcast Solutions

185 - Kevin W- Shares about anxiety, cutting treatment short and having a psychic change Aug 19, 2021

“One day I broke into tears and told my dad I can’t stop drinking and I needed help.” -Kevin

Today, Ben and I are chatting with Kevin, who is an alumnus of Rock Recovery Center. Listen in and find out how Kevin could move past his anxiety, which was the cause of his alcoholism, and move into a life of sobriety. Learn how Kevin is making amends with those he hurt while he was alcoholic, and how he is giving back by supporting other members who are recovering.

Dealing with Severe Anxiety

Although Kevin never was an alcoholic growing up, he discovered that he suffered from severe anxiety and noticed that when he had alcohol, he wouldn’t have panic attacks or other anxiety fallout. In addition, he would also experience anxiety when he came down off of the alcohol he drank, causing his condition to worsen and Kevin to drink more often.

Drinking Alcohol to Reduce Panic Attacks

At the age of 31, Kevin worked at a local high school when he had a severe panic attack that lasted a week. His doctor put him on an SSRI, which helped, and he could go back to work.

A year later, he was drinking daily and wasn’t able to work at all. Working for his father, Kevin had to tell him he was an alcoholic and needed help. Not knowing about detox facilities, Kevin went to his local hospital, which admitted him for a high heart rate for several days from his anxiety. Two months later, he was back in the hospital from heavy drinking and using cocaine.

Outpatient Treatment

He attended an intensive outpatient treatment but did not identify as an alcoholic. Although the center recommended that Kevin take an AA program, he refused to go to meetings.

After trying three centers, including a PHP center, he was only clean for three days until he went back to drinking. Kevin finally found freedom from his addiction at Rock Recovery Center in 2021.

Check out our website where you can download any episode along with helpful information for those in recovery and the families of those in recovery.

Share this podcast with a friend and leave us a review!

Show Notes:

[04:36] Kevin introduces himself and gives his backstory.

[11:42] Anxiety as an underlying issue to alcoholism.

[15:48] Drinking intermittently to calm a week-long panic attack.

[20:40] Progression from alcohol to cocaine and other dry goods drugs.

[23:05] How Kevin started drinking and how his alcoholism progressed with his anxiety.

[29:05] Going through the levels of care to get to recovery.

[32:29] Back into drinking when living at home with his parents post-recovery.

[33:30] Red flags and issues that Kevin had when he came to Rock Recovery Center.

[41:11] Being of service to others by driving them to meetings.

[43:01] Coming up on one year of sobriety!

[48:22] How Kevin has turned around his life since coming to Rock Recovery Center.

Episode Links and Resources

Find out more about Al-Anon and how this resource can support your family

Ideas for a show? Email us tom@realrecoverytalk.com and ben@realrecoverytalk.com

Podcast editing and show notes by Pro Podcast Solutions

184 - Darell shares why he turned to alcohol to deal with night terrors and PTSD - His treatment experiences and the path moving forward Jul 08, 2021

“At Rock I’m getting to talk to people and come to an understanding of what each of the twelve steps means.” -Darell

Today, Ben and I are chatting with Darell, who served 13 years in the United States Air Force as an EOD. We talk about his challenges post-service in the military and his progression of alcoholism through childhood, the military, and how he found solutions to his addiction when he returned to civilian life.

Darell’s History with Alcohol

Growing up in New York, Darell can’t remember when alcohol wasn’t in his home. His first memory of his grandfather around the age of three was giving him tobacco to chew. So Darell spits it out, and his grandfather gave him a beer to wash it down.

Growing up on a farm, he always had early morning farm chores with his siblings. His older sister would drink beer with his dad after chores in the morning. In addition to the morning alcohol at age five, he also remembers large parties at his farm where his parents would truck in kegs of liquor.

Addicted to Alcohol as a Teen

At 14, Darell was an addict, inviting friends over for drinking parties. “Once I started my goal was to get blackout drunk.” He refused to stop drinking, and as his disease progressed through his teen years, he came to a point where he would drink an entire bottle in one night.

Joining the Air Force as an Alcoholic

Darell says, “I wanted to get away from where I was because everyone was on their second or third DUI.” He realized that this was where he was headed if he didn’t change his environment. Since many of his family members had positive experiences in the military, Darell thought this would be an excellent way to sober up and reclaim his life.

“For me it was a no-brainer just do what you’re told and you’ll get through this,” he says of his first days in the military. His job was to dispose of explosives and other weapons in his unit. He spent three tours abroad, disarming bombs in Iraq and Afghanistan.

Listen in and find out how Darell was able to get alcohol while on tour, why being in the military didn’t stop him from drinking, and why he decided to quit drinking.

Check out our new website where you can download any episode along with other useful information for those in recovery.

Share this podcast with a friend and leave us a review!

Show Notes:

[01:40] Growing up with alcohol on a farm in New York.

[04:30] Starting his alcohol addiction at age 12.

[10:00] Addiction norms depending on your culture and location.

[15:26] Ben’s inability to stop drinking while addicted.

[18:35] How different people get into alcoholism.

[20:11] Why Darell decided to join the Air Force.

[25:57] His job and the responsibilities that came along with ammunition disposal.

[27:52] How Darell was able to acquire alcohol while on tour in Afghanistan.

[33:37] His exit from the military and circumstances leading to his medical discharge.

[37:09] The diagnosis of PTSD and how that led him to medical treatment.

[45:01] Transitioning from military to civilian life.

[49:00] Changes that happened when he exited the military.

[53:30] What’s different for Darell now that he has his second round of sobriety.

Episode Links and Resources

Find out more about Al-Anon and how this resource can support your family

Ideas for a show? Email us tom@realrecoverytalk.com and ben@realrecoverytalk.com

Podcast editing and show notes by Pro Podcast Solutions

183 - JP Burton - Gaining control of his life through sobriety Jun 24, 2021

“I’ve built routines here at Rock Recovery Center that I still have today.” -JP

Today, Ben and I are chatting with JP Burton, an alumnus of Rock Recovery Center. We speak about essential life skill development that accompanies the treatment process and the road to recovery. Listen to our conversation about prayer, meditation, and positive lifestyle changes that have stayed with JP through his treatment and beyond.

JP’s History and What Led Him to Drug Use

Before drugs, JP enjoyed a life full of family, a home, and a comfortable lifestyle. Through his addiction, he lost his home, his relationship with his children and wrecked or sold his vehicles. By the time he was admitted into treatment in November of 2019, JP was homeless, and the only item he owned was the clothing on his back.

Putting Addiction First

JP acknowledges that he didn’t lose his family, homes, and cars. He readily admits that he had a choice and gave away all that he had. “No one was holding a gun to my head, I just gave it all away.” When he first went to treatment, he was healing from a compound fracture to his leg and started walking in detox. “You’ve never seen someone so excited about treatment.” However, when he finally was able to get drugs out of his body, he realized he needed to change his mindset if he could survive and thrive after addiction.

It’s not a Drug Problem, It’s a Personality Problem

Ben says that his mentor told him that he didn’t have a drug problem; he had a personality problem. After years and years of repeated patterns and behavior, learning to become sober long-term equates to creating changes in thinking. You can put down the alcohol and drugs, but remember that this takes time to find and replace negative habits with positive habits.

Building New Routines for His New Life

JP has never missed a day of routine since he came to Rock Recovery Center. He wakes up at 5 am, prays, and reads. Then, he’s off to the gym to work out. Establishing this routine and making an effort to meet others who are also in recovery has helped him rebuild his life step-by-step and give him the ability to make his world better.

Listen in and find out why community is a big part of a successful recovery, why helping others with their sobriety brings joy to JP, and why JP believes that routine is vital for successful sobriety.

Check out our new website where you can download any episode along with other useful information for those in recovery.

Share this podcast with a friend and leave us a review!

Show Notes:

[03:34] Why JD decided to put drugs first and lose everything.

[04:33] Playing the victim role when we lose material goods to drugs.

[07:38] When alcohol or drugs take over your life, you start to lose the ability to choose.

[10:24] The realization of what life is like without drugs and alcohol.

[14:12] How JP’s mindset changed once he was at Rock Recovery Center.

[16:10] Building new routines for a more successful life.

[21:18] Buying into the process of routine and becoming a member of the community.

[26:12] Why JP wants to help as many people become sober as possible.

[30:03] JP’s routine and why it keeps him moving forward in his sobriety.

[36:00] What to look for if you’re searching for a good recovery center for your loved one.

Episode Links and Resources

Find out more about Al-Anon and how this resource can support your family

Ideas for a show? Email us tom@realrecoverytalk.com and ben@realrecoverytalk.com

Podcast editing and show notes by Pro Podcast Solutions

182 - Tommy L - How one Corona took him down a deep dark path Jun 17, 2021

“I’ve had family members that have died from addiction, but I never thought that I would have an addiction.” -Tommy

Today, Ben and I are chatting with Tommy, who became an addict after taking narcotic drugs for pain relief after a motorcycle accident. Since he has addiction in his family, Tommy wasn’t a stranger to the effects of drugs and alcohol on a person and their loved ones.

Why Tommy Didn’t Think Addiction was in his Future

“I never saw myself as that person that has a need for anything other than myself,” Tommy explains. Looking back, Tommy sees behaviors and patterns that led him down the path to addiction. He would go to parties and drink to the point of losing time, hurting himself or others, and not remembering events that happened while he was drinking.

Prescription Pain Medications as Gateway Drugs

Tommy quickly found that he liked the feeling prescription painkillers afforded him as he felt like he could get up and do anything. At first, he would run out of his prescription early, which quickly escalated to increasing his dose, then the doctor hopping to get more drugs legally. When one of his doctors wouldn’t write him refills for pain medication, he turned to buy heroin and oxycontin on the streets. “Then I was so tired from these drugs that I started cocaine and crack.” Within five years of starting his addiction to prescription pain medication, Tommy was out on the street purchasing only illegal drugs.

The First Round of Addiction Treatment

In 2019, his family gave him the option of getting treatment or leaving their home, so Tommy decided to go to his first treatment facility. “I was scared and didn’t know what to think. I didn’t fully believe in it and I didn’t want to do it.” At this time, he didn’t acknowledge that he was having an issue with drugs and alcohol and didn’t believe that he needed help to get past his addiction. Realizing that he needed help with getting sober, Tommy was motivated to get back on track during his second treatment at Rock Recovery Center.

Listen in and find out why Tommy changed his viewpoint about getting help for his addiction, why having a drink will lead addicts back to treatment in a short time, and why Tommy was scared that he wouldn’t be happy as a recovered addict.

Check out our new website where you can download any episode along with other useful information for those in recovery.

Share this podcast with a friend and leave us a review!

Show Notes:

[03:33] Decompression surgery to his skull led to more health problems after his motorcycle accident.

[04:08] What treatment was like the first time in recovery for Tommy.

[05:37] How his prescription for pain medication led to illegal drug use.

[07:53] Tommy reflects back on his time at the first recovery facility.

[13:08] Getting back to life requires a lifestyle change after addiction.

[18:35] Tommy’s second time in recovery at Rock Recovery Center.

[23:56] The danger of hanging out with old friends who drink and do drugs when you’re an addict.

[29:48] Questioning if he is going to be happy when he was in recovery.

[34:11] The importance of surrounding yourself with positive people after addiction.

[39:08] Life changes that happened to Tommy as he worked through the recovery program.

Episode Links and Resources

Find out more about Al-Anon and how this resource can support your family

Ideas for a show? Email us tom@realrecoverytalk.com and ben@realrecoverytalk.com

Podcast editing and show notes by Pro Podcast Solutions

181 - Noah didn't get straight A's in treatment, but he is thriving! Jun 03, 2021

“My mom was my biggest enabler and as soon as she took her foot off the gas pedal my life came crumbling down around me. That’s where the biggest change and growth came from.” -Noah

Today, Ben and I are chatting with Noah, who was 20 when he received his first DUI. His parents kicked him out of the house after this event. Forced to attend AA, his grandmother took him to his meetings. Not understanding the program or the benefits of completing the 12 Step Program, Noah wasn’t an engaged participant in the program when he first started his road to recovery.

Events that Led to Noah Receiving His First DUI

“Me and my mom would get into it over anything and everything,” explains Noah. He would fight with her about little details and would refuse to help out around the house. Noah liked his work pattern: go out to drink, come home, and repeat this daily pattern. Although his mom was encouraging Noah to seek help, he didn’t believe he had a problem. “I was living life the way I thought it should be lived.” He didn’t see his alcoholism because he found that many of his friends lived the same type of lifestyle, so Noah normalized his way of life through others.

His Life Post-DUI

Losing the ability to be independent and drive himself to where he wanted to go, Noah soon realized the humiliation that accompanied losing his privilege to drive. “I had all this freedom to do what I wanted and then suddenly it was stripped away.” Sitting at his parent’s house, his mom caught him drinking. She sent him to a nearby detox center to clean up his act.

Relapse Patterns and His Struggle to Become Sober

Not feeling like he belonged in treatment, Noah wanted to fast track to the next step so he could get home and live the way he wanted to live. Putting on a show and not being his genuine self, Noah refused to dive into what he needed to do to become a sober member of society.

After going through his first detox treatment in his hometown, Noah ended up back drinking alone in his room. His mom sent him back to detox again.

Listen in and find out why the crowd at the detox center affected Noah’s ability to get clean, what happened when his mom wouldn’t let him live at home, and why Noah was kicked out of recovery.

Check out our new website where you can download any episode along with other useful information for those in recovery.

Share this podcast with a friend and leave us a review!

Show Notes:

[03:33] Noah’s first DUI, which led him down a negative spiral of life events.

[04:20] What led Noah’s parents to kick Noah out of their home.

[05:53] His life after getting kicked out of his parent’s house post first DUI.

[10:34] Noah struggles through multiple attempts at recovery.

[14:42] What happened after Noah left his first detox treatment in Illinois.

[17:21] His mom reaches her breaking point and doesn’t allow Noah to live with the family again.

[21:01] Ben explains recovery capital and the reason for living after addiction.

[22:12] Rehab romance and why it didn’t end well for Noah.

[26:11] Noah was asked to leave on administrative discharge because he wasn’t progressing through the addiction program.

[28:59] Ben tells mom to stop paying for all of Noah’s mistakes.

[31:37] Noah regresses back to drinking after this fourth time in recovery.

[34:13] The importance of pulling the plug and not enabling your addict.

[41:49] Why a support group is needed to hold each other accountable.

Episode Links and Resources

Find out more about Al-Anon and how this resource can support your family

Ideas for a show? Email us tom@realrecoverytalk.com and ben@realrecoverytalk.com

Podcast editing and show notes by Pro Podcast Solutions

180 - The Importance of Staying Connected and How Giving Back has Kept Him Sober with Eric Sheets May 27, 2021

“Alcoholics Anonymous didn’t just save my life, it taught me how to live a life worthy of having been spared and changed me from the inside out.” -Eric Sheets

Today, Ben and I are chatting to Eric Sheets, who is sharing his story of recovery and how he has taken his experience to give back and help other addicts become sober again.

Eric’s Background with Drugs and Alcohol

Eric says he came to the 12 Step Program a “broken man” and admits that this is the first time he has been honest with himself. “I could see that fear has governed my life as long as I can remember.”

He did have a stretch of sobriety between 2003 and 2010 when his wife fell ill with a rare lung disease and was terminally ill. “In that time I found God and my understanding of him” because, for the first time in his life, he understood his purpose. Although he realized that God put his wife into his life, he still didn’t believe that he was an addict and didn’t understand what this lifestyle entails.

The Second Phase of Drinking for Eric

After his wife passed away, Eric didn’t drink for several weeks until he was invited to a dinner party where a woman gave him a glass of wine after convincing Eric that he wasn’t an alcoholic. He remembers that moment like it was yesterday and picked up his addiction at the moment he left off.

At the moment he realized he couldn’t move on anymore, he walked into a hospital and told the emergency staff he was going to commit suicide; and he was baker-acted and introduced to Alcoholics Anonymous.

Living a Life of Purpose

“Living a life of purpose makes me happy,” Eric comments. He found that when he has a purpose, he can live sober and help others live sober. “Living in communion with my creator is how I found my purpose and what greater purpose can there be?”

Listen in and find out how Eric came to find his purpose, what happened when he stopped being of service, how fear and selfishness crept into his life, and how he rebuilt his relationship with his son.

Check out our new website where you can download any episode along with other useful information for those in recovery.

Share this podcast with a friend and leave us a review!

Show Notes:

[05:01] History and background on Eric’s early history.

[10:58] The days and weeks following his wife’s death.

[12:45] Picking up his first glass of wine after being sober for seven years.

[14:54] Eric’s rapid progression through alcoholism.

[17:05] When Eric started working the 12 steps, he started to care about other people.

[18:56] How Eric found purpose in his life and how his purpose motivated him to stay sober.

[20:53] The importance of addressing the little issues that trip up addicts.

[23:30] How Eric patched his relationship with his son.

[34:11] Eric found his new wife after his addiction.

[40:23] Putting a “why” between his alcohol and his addiction.

[43:34] The importance of having faith when you’re a recovering addict.

[53:13] His spiritual experience when going through the fifth step.

Episode Links and Resources

Find out more about Al-Anon and how this resource can support your family

Ideas for a show? Email us tom@realrecoverytalk.com and ben@realrecoverytalk.com

Podcast editing and show notes by Pro Podcast Solutions

179 - Fatih Penda - His journey intro recovery and how his upbringing could have held him back May 20, 2021

“I’m able to get high on life with sobriety.” -Faith Penda

Today, Ben and I are chatting to Fatih Penda, a long-term addict who has recovered and is now leading a drug and alcohol-free life. Leading to building a recovery center, Fatih is now leading other adults into recovery and positive life.

Fatih’s Background with Drugs and Alcohol

Born in Salem, Massechuessets with a Muslim upbringing, Fatih always felt different than everyone else. Although his uncle did drink, he isn’t sure where his addiction comes from. “Throughout high school I started taking drinking to the next level, then using and abusing drugs and taking that to the next level,” where he went back and forth between drugs and alcohol.

Spending his summers overseas in Turkey, Fatih understood and spoke two languages fluently, going to school in Turkey and the US. “It was always hard to adjust when I came back to school after the summer.” In his eighth grade year, he found out he was going to start high school in Turkey. With no drinking age, he was able to smoke and drink whenever he wanted to.

Picking Up his First Drink and Getting into Addiction

He would experiment with different drugs and return to the United States for his freshman year of college. Fatih found himself treating life as an adult, and it was hard to get back in with his jock friends and the circle of athletes he previously hung out with. Fatih’s friend gave him acid, and he started tripping in classes, and his drug use escalated from there. Moving onto cocaine and other drugs, including prescription drugs, Fatih’s addiction spiraled out of control.

Fatih’s First Experience with Addiction Treatment

The Muslim culture doesn’t understand addiction and the concept that addicts can’t just stop their addiction. His parents sent him back to Turkey, in an attempt to get him away from the environment that was supporting his addiction. However, Fatih found a way to get prescription drugs cheap and was hooked on Xanax for weeks, eventually ending up in a mental health facility.

Listen in and find how Fatih received sobriety through the 12 Step Program from AA, action steps you can take to start your journey into sobriety, and how sobriety has changed his viewpoint and perspective on life.

Check out our new website where you can download any episode along with other useful information for those in recovery.

Share this podcast with a friend and leave us a review!

Show Notes:

[04:30] Fatih’s early years and his upbringing.

[10:00] Returning back to the states for his college education.

[15:00] His first attempt at recovery from his addiction.

[19:02] Going to a Scientology recovery center for his second treatment.

[28:49] Action steps you can take to make your first move into sobriety.

[33:56] Witnessing the journey from addiction to sobriety.

[35:44] Fatih talks about his upcoming heart surgery.

[38:37] What saved Fatih from crashing and burning on drugs and alcohol.

Episode Links and Resources