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Raising Adults: Future Focused Parenting — Kids & Family
Raising Adults: Future Focused Parenting

If your parenting ever feels like a game of whack-a-mole, we’ve got you. If you are a Type-A planner who wants to parent proactively, we’re here for you. If you find yourself somewhere in between….that parent who longs to parent with intention, but often ends up reacting to situations as they arise, you are our people!

Our distinct philosophy – Future Focused Parenting – takes center stage on the podcast. We open every episode with our own personal “why” to demonstrate bringing intention to specific parenting issues. Then we dive into the “what” and “how” of each topic, moving quickly into actionable tools and strategies our listeners can start using right away.

As your co-hosts, we bring our professional experience to bear, but never fail to share our own struggles as parents. In addition, we have some unique differences in our personalities and beliefs. This dynamic creates a distinct feel, allowing our listeners to explore varying ways to approach parenting topics and ultimately decide what works for their family.

We invite you to listen to the groundbreaking parenting podcast that starts with the end in mind. Stop raising kids; start Raising Adults!

Latest Episodes:

The Three Pillars of the Future Focused Parenting Philosophy Oct 25, 2021

Show notes

In today's episode of Raising Adults, Deana and Kira dive into the three pillars of the Future Focused Parenting Philosophy and how it can be applied to all of your parenting journey. "Be proactive wherever you can be because we want those curveballs to be the exception and not the rule ." - Kira Dorrian. "If you have a strong enough why, you can tolerate almost any how." - Jillian Michaels Today's discussion includes:

Pillar 1: Figure Out Your Why (5:44)
Pillar 2: Uphold Your Family Values (10:23)
Should children be involved in the conversation about family values? (13:51)
Pillar 3: Take a Proactive Approach (16:56)
How to be proactive (19:23)
Proactive discussions on discipline (26:13)

Thanks for joining us today as we shared the three pillars of the Future Focused Parenting philosophy. What was your biggest takeaway? Share it with us on our social media! Huge thanks to our sponsor: The Cozi App! Cozi is the #1 organizing app that families use to juggle school schedules, practices, meetings, doctor's appointments and even a work out or date night. The shared grocery list lets the whole family add items in real time, and you'll never find yourself at the store without the list - it's always on your phone and up to date. The best part? It's all FREE in Cozi . Just download Cozi from the app store to get the free app today! Resources Mentioned The Importance of a Strong Why episode Figuring Out Your Family's Value episode Newsletter sign-up Webinar Thanks for joining us on today's episode of Raising Adults! If you enjoyed today's episode, please head over to iTunes, give us 5 stars, and leave a review to help us reach even more Future Focused Parents. Don't forget to check out our website, visit us on Facebook, or hang out with us on Instagram, to stay up-to-date on what's in store for you.

The Changing Face of Education with Victoria Ransom of Prisma Oct 18, 2021

Show notes

In today's episode of Raising Adults, Deana and Kira discuss the changing face of education with guest Victoria Ransom from Prisma. We dive into what options exist outside of the conventional model, why the conventional model is failing some of our kids and how to find the right fit for your children. Victoria, an entrepreneur since her early twenties, has developed four companies, including Wildfire, which Google acquired in 2012 for $450M. She has an MBA from Harvard Business School and a bachelor of arts degree from Macalester College. In her spare time, she is an avid snowboarder, surfer, and passionate adventure traveler. "For so many kids, part of the problem with school is they're sitting there thinking, when will I ever use this in my life? Why do I need this? And I think applying learning to what you see in your community is one way to make it feel relevant." - Victoria Ransom. Today's discussion includes:

Where Victoria's interest in education began (8:02)
Can traditional education's primary features be problematic? (12:04)
What options exist outside the conventional model? (17:36)
Finding the right model to fit your kids' learning styles (24:11)
How Prisma brings learning alive for kids (29:00)

Are your kids in a traditional educational setting? If not, we'd love to know what you're doing and how it's working for you. Connect with Victoria Website twitter Facebook LinkedIn Instagram Don't forget, for our show to keep going into 2022 we need our Future Focused Parents to become Future Focused Patrons. Join us so that we can keep this content coming your way: patreon.com/ffp or futurefocusedparenting.com/membership Huge thanks to our sponsor: The Cozi App! Cozi is the #1 organizing app that families use to juggle school schedules, practices, meetings, doctor's appointments and even a work out or date night. The shared grocery list lets the whole family add items in real time, and you'll never find yourself at the store without the list - it's always on your phone and up to date. The best part? It's all FREE in Cozi. Just download Cozi from the app store to get the free app today! Thanks for joining us on today's episode of Raising Adults! If you enjoyed today's episode, please head over to iTunes, give us 5 stars, and leave a review to help us reach even more Future Focused Parents. Don't forget to check out our website, visit us on Facebook, or hang out with us on Instagram, to stay up-to-date on what's in store for you.

At What Age Can My Child...? Oct 11, 2021

Show notes

In today's episode of Raising Adults, Deana and Kira discuss the question "How do I know when my child is ready to___________?" Together they talk about everything from leaving kids home alone, to owning their own devices, to when you might expect your little one to be able to tie their own shoes (spoiler alert: Kira's answer may shock you!) Today's discussion includes:

A recap about how you can help keep Raising Adults going in 2022 (4:52)
What you might be able to expect of littles (9:42)
Regression: why it happens and when to expect it (11:51)
Ages for letting kids bathe by themselves (13:30)
When should you separate kids during bath time? (14:16)
Ages for leaving a child alone in a car or at home alone (19:57)
Rehearsing with your kids for privileges, freedoms and phones (22:14)
Adjusting the way you connect when kids become tweens (24:26)
Ages for dating (30:27)
Ages for devices (33:12)

Don't forget, for our show to keep going into 2022 we need our Future Focused Parents to become Future Focused Patrons. Join us so that we can keep this content coming your way: patreon.com/ffp Huge thanks to our sponsor: The Cozi App! Cozi is the #1 organizing app that families use to juggle school schedules, practices, meetings, doctor's appointments and even a work out or date night. The shared grocery list lets the whole family add items in real-time, and you'll never find yourself at the store without the list - it's always on your phone and up to date. The best part? It's all FREE in Cozi. Just download Cozi from the app store to get the free app today! Resources mentioned in this episode: Troomi Wireless Thanks for joining us on today's episode of Raising Adults! If you enjoyed today's episode, please head over to iTunes, give us 5 stars, and leave a review to help us reach even more Future Focused Parents. Don't forget to check out our website, visit us on Facebook, or hang out with us on Instagram, to stay up-to-date on what's in store for you.

Kid Takeover - What They Want Parents To Know Oct 04, 2021

Show notes

In today's episode of Raising Adults, the laundry room and coat closet experience a takeover by Kira and Deana's kiddos: Cienna, Marc, Rhys, and Rhia! Together these future adults are sharing what's really going on in kids' minds and talking about what they want their parents to know. Today's discussion includes:

Introductions (7:07)
Today's why (7:52)
Rhia shares what she wants her mom to know about school (spoiler alert: school is hard!) (8:19)
Cienna shares something she and her Deana do that strengthens their relationship (9:37)
Marc unpacks the common phrase "I'm your parent, not your friend" (11:26)
Rhys shares what Kira is doing well (12:27)
Cienna talks about the importance of fostering and following your children's interests (13:52)
Rhys reminds parents that "It's ok to take time for yourself" (14:57)
Rhia and Cienna talk about the push-pull of wanting independence without making parents feel unloved (16:11)
Marc reminds parents that "kids are smarter than you think, and their feelings are valid" (18:39)
Cienna cautions parents to remember that kids are always listening and watching (19:10)

Wasn't today's episode adorable? We love the honesty and truth that they shared with us. We'd love to know if you had a favorite moment from today. Don't forget, for our show to keep going into 2022 we need our Future Focused Parents to become Future Focused Patrons. Join us so that we can keep this content coming your way: patreon.com/ffp or futurefocusedparenting.com/membership Thanks for joining us on today's episode of Raising Adults! If you enjoyed today's episode, please head over to iTunes, give us 5 stars, and leave a review to help us reach even more Future Focused Parents. Don't forget to check out our website, visit us on Facebook, or hang out with us on Instagram, to stay up-to-date on what's in store for you.

"You Do It" - Future Focused 10 and Up Sep 27, 2021

Show notes

In today's episode of Raising Adults, Deana and Kira wrap up their three-week series of "I Do It," "We Do It," "You Do It." This final "You Do It" phase of ages 10 and up is where we truly begin handing off responsibility and shifting into more of a coaching role as parents. Today's discussion includes:

Recap of "I Do It" and "We Do It" (2:23)
Our Why (3:47)
The three categories of "You Do It" (5:30)
Your child as an individual in this phase (9:20)
Your child and their tasks and responsibilities (11:34)
Example of interacting with tasks (14:16)
How to assess the situation when tasks are not completed (16:14)
The importance of handing off in stages (20:04)
Your child and how they interact with people and the world (21:23)
The shift in parent and child relationship (24:31)
Coaching awkward and challenging situations (25:58)

The "You Do It" phase is a beautiful time where you start to see your hard work pay off. Definitely, a phase to look forward to! Don't forget, for our show to keep going into 2022 we need our Future Focused Parents to become Future Focused Patrons. Join us so that we can keep this content coming your way: Patreon or Future Focused Parenting Website

"We Do It" - Future Focused 5-10 Sep 20, 2021

Show notes

In today's episode of Raising Adults, we head into the second part of our three-week series. Last week we covered the "IDo It" phase of parenting, and today we are talking about the "We Do It" phase. This 5-10 age range is where we truly begin balancing responsibilities with privileges and move into a more collaborative part of the parenting journey. "You know what's really cool about this phase, honestly... The "We Do It" phase is where you're together and you're a team. And so the pressure of "I Do It" comes off of you a little bit, but you haven't worked yourself out of a job yet." - Kira Dorrian "This season is when you are collaboratively working toward things like growing responsibility, growing privileges and growing relational skills. This sets up not only raising your adult but how that adult then views their relationship with you." – Deana Thayer Today's discussion includes:

A recap of the "I Do It" phase (00:57)
Laying the groundwork and reaping the benefits (6:46)
The "We Do It" phase (8:18)
Setting the tone for the parent/child relationship (12:51)
Consistency and communication (16:03)
Kira outlines how she balances chores and privileges (17:23)
Deana shares how she tackled this phase and her "yes posture" (20:27)
How to handle changes in the parent-child relationship (24:56)

Thanks for joining us on today's episode of Raising Adults! If you enjoyed today's episode, please head over to iTunes, give us 5 stars, and leave a review to help us reach even more Future Focused parents. Don't forget to check out our website, visit us on Facebook, or hang out with us on Instagram, twitter, and Pinterest to stay up-to-date on what's in store for you.

"I Do It" - Future Focused 0-5 Sep 13, 2021

Show notes

In today's episode of Raising Adults, we kick off a three-week series applying our framework of "I Do It, We Do It, You Do It" to your parenting journey. We will break down the different stages of parenting and talk about what it means to be a Future Focused Parent in each stage. "If you're fortunate enough to have small people, this is where you not only lay the foundation of how you're parenting with empathy and emotional intelligence while still having boundaries, but you're also laying the foundation for what you are like as a Future Focused Parent." - Deana Thayer Today's discussion includes:

Introduction to "I Do It" (4:24)
What this looks like with infants (6:59)
What if you get it wrong? (9:19)
The toddler years (12:28)
In this phase, you're teaching your child what they can expect from you (14:20)
The preschool years (19:44)
Increasing responsibility and privileges (22:41)
Redirection is not a distraction (23:58)
Preview of "We Do It" (26:44)

We'd love to hear from you! How are you managing this "I Do It" stage with your 0-5 child(ren)? Join us on social media or send us an email to let us know! Episodes Referenced Who's the Boss Babies and Sleep Kids and Manners Kids and Chores Thanks for joining us on today's episode of Raising Adults! If you enjoyed today's episode, please head over to iTunes, give us 5 stars, and leave a review to help us reach even more Future Focused parents. Don't forget to check out our website, visit us on Facebook, or hang out with us on Instagram, twitter, and Pinterest to stay up-to-date on what's in store for you.

Mean Kids, Bullies And Their Parents! Sep 06, 2021

Show notes

In today's episode of Raising Adults, Deana and Kira talk about mean kids, bullies and their parents. Be sure to tune in and listen as we dive into bullying, how it's changed over the years and how there is a difference between "mean kids" and "bullies." Stay tuned until the end to find out who's celebrating a birthday in September!! "In those moments where a child has been harsh, or unkind it is important for me to help my kids ask themselves what might be happening for that child that they feel the need to treat someone that way." - Kira Dorrian "I have encouraged my kids to be careful about labeling someone as a bully over one or two harsh incidents. " - Deana Thayer Today's discussion includes:

Deana shares her two whys (6:53)
Kira's why (8:16)
Why labels can be damaging (10:42)
Equipping kids with coping tools and discernment (11:47)
Compassion and empathy for kids who bully (17:20)
Dealing with other parents who aren't collaborative problem solvers (23:23)
Owning that our kids are human and continuing to help them grow (27:06)
Tips for coping with interactions that aren't collaborative (28:06)
Being honest with ourselves: are we receiving feedback and are we open to hearing areas where our children need to grow (31:00)

We'd love to hear your thoughts on this topic. Join us on social media to let us know! Want your FREE copy of the attributes and character traits calendar? Visit bit.ly/RaisingAdultsPodcast or visit FutureFocusedParenting.com Thanks to our sponsor The MamaZen App - Helping Moms Feel Sane! The MamaZen app specializes in helping moms change their motherhood habits, so they can become patient, mindful, calmer, happier, and raise happy and mindful adults. Use promo code FUTURE to get full, unlimited FREE access to MamaZen for 30 days. Thanks for joining us on today's episode of Raising Adults! If you enjoyed today's episode, please head over to iTunes, give us 5 stars, and leave a review to help us reach even more Future Focused parents. Don't forget to check out our website, visit us on Facebook, or hang out with us on Instagram, twitter, and Pinterest to stay up-to-date on what's in store for you.

When To Be "That Mom" with Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables of the What Fresh Hell: Laughing in the Face of Motherhood podcast Aug 30, 2021

Show notes

In today's episode of Raising Adults, we have the opportunity to double date with the hosts of the popular podcast What Fresh Hell - Laughing in the Face of Motherhood, Amy Wilson and Margaret Ables. Be sure to tune in and listen as we dive into what it means to be "that mom" and how we can best advocate for our kids. "When advocating for your kid, come with both the problem and the solution." - Amy Wilson "Be very aware of…am I always the person advocating for my needs and my kid's needs in a way that is taking needed resources from other people or really inconveniencing other people?" - Margaret Ables Today's highlights include:

Margaret shares that she was a comedian, television writer and her why for being "that mom" (4:01)
Amy talks about her book, family, and her why (5:06)
Why it is "that mom" and not "that dad" or "that parent" (6:50)
The line between helicopter mom and tiger mom (9:01)
Is there a time for spiciness vs. doing it kindly? (12:37)
Come with a solution to the problem (18:03)
Intentionality and values while advocating for your kids (19:41)
Steps to take once you've decided to be "that mom" (21:20)
How to be emotionally prepared for difficult conversations and uncomfortable truths (24:11)
A useful framework: rude behavior vs. mean behavior vs. bullying behavior (26:36)

References from today's episode: When To Be 'That Mom' episode Ask Amy - My Kid's Friend Is Now Bullying Him. Should I Get Involved Signe Whitson Connect with Amy and Margaret: Facebook Group Instagram Website Twitter TikTok YouTube Amy's Book Thanks to our sponsors The MamaZen App - Helping Moms Feel Sane! The MamaZen app specializes in helping moms change their motherhood habits, so they can become patient, mindful, calmer, happier, and raise happy and mindful adults. Use promo code FUTURE to get full, unlimited FREE access to MamaZen for 30 days. Thanks for joining us on today's episode of Raising Adults! If you enjoyed today's episode, please head over to iTunes, give us 5 stars, and leave a review to help us reach even more Future Focused parents. Don't forget to check out our website, visit us on Facebook, or hang out with us on Instagram and Twitter to stay up-to-date on what's in store for you.

Supporting Future Focused Grandparents Aug 23, 2021

Show notes

In today's episode of Raising Adults, Deana and Kira talk about supporting future focused grandparents and the complexities that entails. Don't miss this episode! "The most important question grandparents can ask of their adult children is, where do I need to match you and where can I depart from that and just enjoy being a grandparent?" - Deana Thayer "Please, grandparents, remember that the intensity and expectation of parents when you were parenting is not the same as it is now." - Kira Dorrian Today's highlights include:

Kira shares her two-part why (3:28)
Deana's blended family two-part why (6:20)
Finding a middle ground in grandparenting (8:57)
Preparing for a grandchild on the way (11:46)
Importance of communicating regularly and checking in (13:50)
Graciously receiving feedback as grandparents (15:00)
Asking for clarity without judgment (18:27)
The intensity and expectations of parenting are not the same as a generation ago (20:01)
Blended family...it's like a crockpot (22:42)
Creative communication is key to successful future focused grandparenting(28:24)

Much of what makes for a successful future focused grandparenting relationship is communication. This includes asking questions, clarifying without judgment, finding ways to partner with your adult children and considering how you create a safe space for receiving feedback. We really hope that you enjoyed this episode today and look forward to hearing your thoughts! If you are new to the FFP philosophy, check out our past episodes on The Importance of a Strong Why and Figuring Out Your Family's Values. Also, our recorded webinar Becoming a Future Focused Parent. Thanks to our sponsor The MamaZen App - Helping Moms Feel Sane! The MamaZen app specializes in helping moms change their motherhood habits, so they can become patient, mindful, calmer, happier, and raise happy and mindful adults. Use promo code FUTURE to get full, unlimited FREE access to MamaZen for 30 days. Thanks for joining us on today's episode of Raising Adults! If you enjoyed today's episode, please head over to iTunes, give us 5 stars, and leave a review to help us reach even more Future Focused parents. Don't forget to check out our website, visit us on Facebook, or hang out with us on Instagram, twitter, and Pinterest to stay up-to-date on what's in store for you.

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