Radically Selfish

Latest Episodes:

Episode 13: Michelle Keinan - A Special Message About DO YOU Apr 26, 2018

Show notes

Today’s episode is all about what it really means to be “selfish” as a woman, and next week’s launch of DO YOU, a revolutionary new group for women ready to live the life of their desires. Here to inspire us is Michelle Keinan, founder of Radically Selfish and feminist powerhouse.

When Michelle decided to take everything she’d been working on and rebrand it with the “Radically Selfish” name, there was a huge ripple effect — people have a lot of preconceived notions about what it means to be selfish, few of them positive. As women, we’re taught that selfishness is a childish, vain thing, and that it means putting ourselves first to the detriment of those around us.

It’s an implicit judgment that makes us shrink in on ourselves, that constricts what we think we’re capable of or the value we place on ourselves and our needs and desires. From our relationships to our jobs, our fear of being branded “selfish” holds us back in myriad ways.

The thing is, we make the decision to let that fear rule our life — it’s a hard choice, but it’s a choice. Michelle’s new group, DO YOU, is about choosing to make a DIFFERENT choice, day after day, until it becomes second nature and YOU become the guru, the expert, the only person whose opinion matters.

DO YOU is an opportunity for to work together, to harness the collective energy of a group of powerful women making the conscious decision to do what feels best for them and lead lives based on desire. Registration for DO YOU closes this weekend — reach out to learn more!

https://michellekeinan1.typeform.com/to/F1yXzh

More Radical Lessons in this episode:

— We’re taught that selfishness is bad, and it makes us sacrifice pieces of ourselves; in reality, taking care of ourselves is the best first step to taking care of the people around us.

— The disempowerment we feel when we allow ourselves to believe we don’t deserve more shows up in everything we do; we stay in unhealthy relationships and situations because we tell ourselves this is all we’re worth.

— Each one of us gets to decide every day how we’re going to treat ourselves and value ourselves, or whether we’re going to let other people define those things for us.

— A decision means a choice, and whenever we get to make a choice it’s just one of many possibilities.

— Ask yourself: what choices are you making? What do you reinforce in your life? Are they the right choices for you, or are they the right choices for someone else? Confront how you might be holding yourself back.

Links!

Website: https://michellekeinan1.typeform.com/to/F1yXzh

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/radicallyselfish/

Share Michelle’s Wisdom on Social Media!

Episode 12: Adrienne Maree Brown - Self-Care is Political Warfare Apr 19, 2018

Show notes

Today’s episode is all about the connection between human pleasure and liberation. Here to inspire us is social justice facilitator, writer, doula, and pleasure activist Adrienne Maree Brown.

Adrienne has dedicated her life to freedom and pleasure, writing, black liberation movements, and challenging the government. The current culmination of that work is the upcoming book, Pleasure Activism: The Politics of Feeling Good.

Inspired by an Audre Lorde essay dealing with erotic awakening, it’s founded on the idea that as a society we allow injustice and oppression to persist because we believe we don’t deserve pleasure, and therefore don’t pursue it. Adrienne’s approach is to look at how to turn justice and liberation into the most pleasurable experience a person can have, so that they become something we naturally strive for.

It’s okay to love yourself. It’s okay to be good to yourself. It’s okay to choose your life, and your pleasure, and to prioritize those things. Adrienne shares how interconnected we all are with our communities, how we always have a choice, what it means to have personal integrity, and how to build foundational relationships.

There’s a lot to be learned in this episode, and as Adrienne says, “When there’s something to learn, I’m in my life. I’m in my flow.”

More Radical Lessons in this episode:

— Pay attention to moments of raw, natural behavior as opportunities to get in touch with ancestral spirits.

— Strike a balance in the modern world where you can still access magic and wisdom and draw on intangible energy to make the impossible possible.

— We don’t get to avoid challenges and loss (they ripen our lives), but our purpose is to constantly choose to think “I’m alive, what a joy, what a pleasure,” not to focus on suffering.

— Caring for yourself is not self-indulgence, it’s political warfare.

— We all need to be active participants in our own pleasure.

— The joy you feel doing work that feeds directly back into your community is immeasurable.

— Self-care only seems selfish if you’re not taking into account the lack of privilege that is the baseline for most people.

— Create quiet spaces in this busy world to tap into something that feels new.

— Take the space and time to find out what you really care about, find people who care about the same thing, and build relationships rooted in that.

— Race is a construct and money is a construct, but they both have real impact; holding that dual truth lets you shift the systems.

— If you feel unsafe and like you don’t belong, it becomes nearly impossible to turn and face and enjoy your life.

— Our worth is tied up in the places you make critical connections in your life; those connections nourish you.

— When you love people, you let them see you fully and help you. You’re there for eachother.

Links!

Website: http://adriennemareebrown.net/

Twitter: https://twitter.co

Episode 11: Michelle Keinan - Trust Your Own Authority Apr 13, 2018

Show notes

Today’s episode is all about how to reconnect with your inner wisdom! Here to inspire us is our very own host, Michelle Keinan, transformational mentor and power guide.

The freedom of having a choice to make is usually equal parts thrilling and overwhelming. We get stuck in a feedback loop, comparing pros and cons or asking friends and family for advice, agonizing about what the thing we “should” do is.

When it comes down to it, “should” is utterly subjective — so Michelle says the number one thing you can do is stop asking other people what to do! So many of us are so disconnected from our intuition and our gut instinct that it might feel like we go into a tailspin whenever we’re faced with different options, but the answer is there, inside of us.

You have to quiet down, ask yourself what you want, and then wait to hear the answer. It might come right away or it might take a while, but the important part is to be still and listen. Your job is to make the space, create the silence, ask yourself the question, treat yourself with respect, listen to what’s there, and then decide what you want to do next. It’s all about you.

More Radical Lessons in this episode:

— No matter how good someone else’s intentions, the only advice they can give you is really what’s best for them; only you know what’s best for YOU.

— Over time, when we decide to let other people’s opinions drown ours out, we lose our ability to connect with our inner guidance system or our inner wisdom.

— Every choice we make allows us to illuminate something else or lead us further down a path; there is no one way to do things.

— If you’re working with someone or have someone in your life that doesn’t give you the space or freedom to make decisions on your own, think about how you need to approach that relationship.

— When we live according to other people’s definition of success we inevitably feel like something is missing.

— Create the space to listen to your intuition; you were born with it...sometimes it’s a voice and sometimes it’s a feeling, and you get to tap into that at any time you want by talking to it.

— “Adulting” and consciousness are about standing up for yourself, and are about being true to yourself.

— Integrity is really important; we give authority figures respect, so we need to treat ourselves the same way.

— The more you can amplify the volume and hear what your inner guidance system is telling you, the more grounded and true you feel.

Links!

Website: http://radicallyselfish.com/

Instagram: @RadicallySelfish

Episode 10: StyleLikeU - Own What Makes You Unique Apr 05, 2018

Show notes

Today’s episode is all about finding comfort in our own skins and embracing the things that make us uniquely beautiful. Here to inspire us are the mother-daughter duo behind StyleLikeU, Elisa Goodkind and Lily Mandelbaum.

StyleLikeU was born when Elisa — a former fashion stylist frustrated with the industry — noticed Lily, her teenage daughter, struggling with her body image. Together they decided to create an alternative to the unattainable status quo, launching StyleLikeU in 2009 with their “Closet” series, and “The What’s Underneath Project” in 2014, both aimed at demonstrating that true beauty and style are the unique result of loving the skins we’re in.

In this episode, we get a peek at Elisa and Lily’s emotional journey with StyleLikeU, and dig deep into some of the big issues surrounding our relationship with fashion, and ultimately with ourselves. Their ultimate dream? To see people accept themselves and have fun with clothing, to awaken each of us to our own potential for creativity and self-expression.

From the transformation of style over the last 30 years to the insidious efforts of the fashion industry, the pros and cons of social media as a platform to the transformational power of an interview, this is one conversation you won’t want to miss.

More Radical Lessons in this episode:

— In the 80s and 90s people felt freer to stand out from the crowd; now, corporations and marketing preys on our lowest common denominator, feeding our fears of being othered.

— We need to awaken to the fact that our slow “forgetting” of self-expression is not superficial, it’s deep; creativity demands uniqueness and authenticity.

— People don’t even realize that they don’t love themselves as much as they could.

— Social media has a lot of problems, but it also gives a voice to niche and marginalized communities who would have been shutout in the era when magazines dictated everything.

— The journey is very important. You need time to feel someone’s transformation and catharsis and have a meaningful experience with it.

— The interview process can be cathartic; it’s a sacred time and space to share yourself, and fall in love with each other.

— Capitalism on steroids has created a standard of beauty that really literally almost no one can fit into. It’s an avatar.

— The most beautiful and inspiring people are the ones who embrace the thing about themselves that culture at large tells them to reject.

— Dressing yourself is about wanting to be conscious. It’s a very instinctual thing, but we’re so distanced from our instincts, people hardly know what they are anymore.

Links!

Website: http://stylelikeu.com/

YouTube: https://www.youtube.com/user/stylelikeu/

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/stylelikeu/

Episode 9: Michelle Keinan - You Don’t Have to Believe What You Think Mar 29, 2018

Show notes

Today’s episode is all about reprogramming your thoughts and learning to take back your power! Here to inspire us is our very own host, Michelle Keinan, transformational mentor and power guide.

Michelle shares personal truths on what it means to step back and examine our thoughts with total consciousness, and to use that newfound awareness to shape our lives for the better.

When we confront who we are at a basic level — our beliefs — it can be challenging, but it can also be a massive opportunity for personal growth. When you strive to be wholly and utterly yourself every day, you’re suddenly able to connect with people and create relationships built on a mutual understanding of one another.

That’s the idea that inspires Michelle’s teaching here: we don’t have to believe what we think. When we walk through life thinking our beliefs are set in stone, and that we — and others — can’t change, it’s incredibly disempowering. But we can change, and in this episode Michelle shares her favorite way to start: with Katie Byron’s The Work.

It’s a simple practice that just requires commitment, and Michelle breaks down the ins and outs and connecting them to real-world examples. Incorporate this practice into your life to discover that any given belief or story you have for yourself isn’t the only belief or story of your life, it’s just one possibility. It’s up to you to pick your own path!

More Radical Lessons in this episode:

— Beliefs are nothing more than thoughts we’ve thought so many times that we’ve come to accept them as absolute truths. They’re mental habits, and they aren’t always good ones.

— Who would you be without your beliefs? How would you feel if you chose to believe something else instead?

— Always remember to step outside your own head and try to consider the situation you’re in from every possible angle, and you may realize that what you thought was the only possible viewpoint was just one, narrow perspective.

— Our beliefs are stories that we tell ourselves that we start to believe are our story.

— We all walk through the world with a point of view informed by our pasts, but we can choose how much we let those experiences affect us, and what story we’re writing.

— When you learn to let go and observe your own thoughts, you start to liberate your mind from whatever you’ve trained yourself to believe over time.

— Finding peace is always about looking within ourselves; it’s a matter of being willing to dive deep and ask the right questions.

Links!

Website: http://radicallyselfish.com/

Instagram: @RadicallySelfish

Episode 8: Tasha Blank - Commit to Not Staying Safe Mar 22, 2018

Show notes

Today’s episode is all about committing to not staying safe, to pulling back our safety blankets and seeing what happens when we fully let go and say “fuck it!” Here to inspire us is Tasha Blank, an artist, teacher, speaker, and DJ/producer on a mission to set the world free.

Tasha has devoted her last decade to understanding how the technologies of the mind, music, and movement can be used to unlock our fullest potential. Her underground dance phenomenon, The Get Down, along with everything else she does — writing, coaching, teaching, composing, DJing, partying, dancing — is dedicated to letting the most liberated, badass versions of ourselves run wild.

Tasha built her life around music and dancing as the mediums for her ultimate message about the possibility and adventure and truth to be found in our lives. She discovered that the quickest way to flip herself out of her bullshit brain and into the real and possible was through movement and sound, and has pursued that path ever since.

With dance, Tasha explores the way in which people in Western cultures have become disconnected from their bodies and trapped in their own minds. DJing and music became the channel through which Tasha now explores the mind-body connection.

Listening to our bodies and figuring out what we truly need is key to reconnecting with something important that we’ve all lost — our gut instinct. It can be a frightening process, and it’s certainly not easy, but committing to facing our fears and moving beyond them is the surest path forward towards making our dreams a reality.

More Radical Lessons in this Episode:

Music and dance aren’t separate from our bodies — we all have ears, we all hear rhythm, and rhythms move us.
Our bodies store emotions, feelings, and trauma, but we’ve only been educated to process things intellectually, not physically; dance helps us learn to process what’s in our bodies.
Trying something new is hard. We have to surrender to the fact that we’ll just suck at it for a while.
It’s easy to psych yourself out of doing something and decide something’s not possible before even trying, but you need to be tenaciously committed to staying in motion and staying uncomfortable to achieve what you want.
When we do things for ourselves that we truly need — sleep, nourish our bodies, move — we’re fulfilling universal needs, and ultimately increasing everyone else’s chances of fulfilling their own.
Create spaces for safe, consensual dancing to help people to come home to themselves and listen to their bodies.
So many (if not all) of the lines we draw between ourselves and others are completely false — ignore them, and embrace everyone.
Your head may be telling you something is right, but you need to listen to your gut; pay attention when you feel an internal resistance to something.
To understand some of our patriarc

Episode 7: Maria Christina Gabriel - Opening Yourself Up to Healing Mar 08, 2018

Show notes

Today’s episode is all about opening yourself up to healing. Here to guide us is Maria Christina Gabriel, a New York City-based Intuitive offering Mentoring Sessions, Readings, and Retreats. Christina's mission is to guide you to create a life infused with purpose.

By honoring traditions and creating modern approaches, Christina's work is energetic and instinctive. She holds space by blending different modalities - healing touch, plant medicine, astrology and holistic health - allowing clients to access greater healing and fulfillment. Christina is the creator of the German self-study course Power of Ceremony which will also be available in the US in 2018.

In this episode, she walks us through the process of discovering different rituals and ceremonies to heal various parts of your life. She believes that it is important to understand that we need different things every day, as every day is different. She also touches on the idea of rebirthing and discovering who you are and what you want to be, and not what other people want to be.

Christina believes that lot of times we hold ourselves back because we are afraid of what people might say, or that it might not work out. When we allow ourselves to come out of that shell, we show people that they can create the space for themselves to do the same. She urges you to allow yourself to heal and explains how there are different rituals and ceremonies you can use to heal various parts of your life. Allow the energy to be there and let go. Stop trying to make things a certain way, and allow energy to heal you so you can come home to yourself.

More Radical Lessons in this Episode:

You don’t have to live up to the version of you that your parents created you to be.
Ask yourself these questions: What is my spirit craving in this moment? How can I serve myself and care for myself in this moment?
Take this moment to breathe, to come back to your body, to connect with yourself again.
Children have a connection with the world, but when you grow up you may lose that. We often try to be “normal” and we lose the creativity and the connection to the world that we once had.
We carry the medicine to every problem that comes into our lives
We don’t always need a “why” in order to meditate. You can just sit there and be with yourself and just be.
It is not about being so brave that fear can not touch you, it’s about learning what you need to take that next step.
Use your energy towards something you want, not just about something you don’t want.
There is light mixed with darkness, there is balance in every situation.
Your body is your home and it is all that you have. There is so much that we need to detach and actually come home.
You have to focus on the

Episode 6: Radical Selfie – Personal Truths from Michelle K Mar 01, 2018

Show notes

Host Michelle K. is sharing personal truths on what it means to be a fully expressed and conscious woman in 2018 – and how you can live the life YOU want, no matter what society, your family, or your past has taught you before.

Transformational Mentor + Power Guide Michelle K. is sharing an amazing daily practice that will change your life and elevate your self-worth. Learn how taking 5 minutes can connect you to your inner power, and elevate your sense of self-worth.

Test Feb 28, 2018

Show notes

Episode 5: Melinda Alexander: Rediscovering What It Means to Care for Yourself (Part 2) Feb 15, 2018

Show notes

Find your own meditation that works for you Rediscover what it means to care for yourself How to create boundaries that feel good to you Rewiring your relationship with your “triggers” Everyone’s on a similar journey, but no one’s paths will look the same. Today’s episode is all about rediscovering what it means to care for yourself. This is part 2 of our amazing interview with Melinda Alexander. Melinda knows the importance of finding the time to care for herself as she works on balancing her successful business with motherhood. She understands that not everyone shares the same journey and encourages others to find the form of self care that works best for them. Melinda Alexander is a writer, mother, workshop facilitator, and activist who does women’s work. She lives in LA with her 7 year old and partner. She focuses on doing women’s work and helps women reimagine themselves, their style, and their lives. Melinda takes time every day to do her form of meditation, where she looks at her judgement or uncomfortable feelings and dives inward to discover what is really wrong. In this episode, she walks us through the idea that meditation is different for everyone, and your breakthroughs won’t always come from sitting on the mat. Instead, she uses meditation as an exploration whenever she is able to find the time to do so. Melinda also speaks about the importance of creating boundaries that feel good to you, and aren’t just “necessary”. She believes that no one’s journey is not going to look like hers, and there is no blanket path that will work for each individual. There are layers of experience and privilege that are different for everyone, and it is important to find your truth and your boundaries that work with your journey. When you look at others and experience jealousy, you have to reel it back in and trust that you will find the things that are meant for you when it is the right time for you to do so. She believes there is a large importance in finding the balance between getting rid of toxic people and triggers, and rewiring your relationship with those triggers. More Radical Lessons in this Episode Use meditation as an exploration. You may have an epiphany in the grocery store but you don’t always have the time to deal with it and go deeper. Then later, you can meditate and figure out what is going on and just sit and be with it. Anytime you can just sit and be with however you are feeling and noticing your emotions is meditation. Take time to discover what you are actually pissed off about. It’s rarely ever about the thing someone just said, but instead what you internalize it as. How to create boundaries that feel good to you that aren’t just “necessary”. Try to create enough mental space and agility to create a pattern and notice how you react when certain things come up. When meditating, new information can come up that isn’t external, but instead is internal with yourself and how you process things. Melinda would rather spend money on self care that is proactive and energy shifting, something that gives her support in what she is already doing. Self care for Melinda is like going to the doctor and finding the underlying issue that is causing her distress, or working towards fixing what is wrong in her life. We need to balance how much time we spend on social media and how much we actually take looking at our own lives. There was a time where we didn’t have social media, we only had movies, and we knew to some degree that those people were actors.

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