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Parenting with Impact — Kids & Family
Parenting with Impact

The Parenting with Impact Podcast with Elaine Taylor-Klaus and Diane Dempster, co-creators of ImpactParents.com, inspires parents and professionals guiding complex kids, teens and young adults all over the world to become capable, independent adults. ImpactParents.com is an online community, award-winning blog, and direct service provider for parents and professionals. Elaine and Diane are certified professional coaches with their own lived experience raising children with complex challenges such as ADHD, anxiety, depression, learning disabilities, gender identity issues, and more. Drawing from both personal and professional experience, they teach and inspire parents and professionals to raise and empower complex kids with confidence and calm. Scroll down for links and to download a free parenting guide. The Parenting with Impact Podcast will:Feature leading experts, bringing you cutting edge information to address your child’s challengesTeach you real-life, practical strategies for creating lasting changeDemonstrate how a coach-approach can improve all of your communications, one conversation at a time For the essentials of ImpactParent’s coach-approach to parenting, download a free parenting guide at: ImpactParents.com/Podcast Find out about Sanity School®, a program for Parents, at: https://impactparents.com/programs-offerings/parent-training-sanity-school/ For information about professional continuing education: https://impactparents.com/for-professionals/ Visit Impact Parents at: https://impactparents.com/

Copyright: Copyright © 2021 Impact Parents | All rights reserved

Latest Episodes:

EP281 When Your Teen Pulls Away: Rebuilding Trust After Conflict Aug 26, 2026

Show notes

Does it feel like your kid is pulling away? Always closing their door, avoiding you, or talking to you only when they have to? For neurodiverse families, this shift often comes from normal development colliding with an already taxed parent-child relationship. In this episode, Elaine and Diane dig into where that disconnect happens and what actually works to rebuild trust and connection with your kid. They unpack the shift from "I'm afraid for you" to "I believe in you," and why that one mindset change can transform your dynamic. If you've been feeling shut out, this is your on-ramp back in.

What to expect in this episode:

Why a teenager pulling away and closing their door is often a normal part of development, not necessarily a red flag
How the parent's role as "director" can create a second layer of disconnection on top of natural individuation
A reframe of "trust" as a felt sense of safety and comfort, not just honesty or truth-telling
A practical mindset shift — "I believe in you" instead of "I'm afraid for you" — and why it changes how our kids experience us
Why creating space for an uncertain (but very possible) positive future can help you calm enough to make reconnection possible

Download free guide: Top 12 Tips To Help Your Complex Kids
Connect with ImpactParents:

EP280 SODA: The Four Ways Parents Get Reactive (And How to Recognize Them) Aug 19, 2026

Show notes

Ever feel like you're spiraling? If it seems like nothing you try is working and you're somehow driving your kid further away, you're not alone—and it's not just about your kid. In this episode, Elaine and Diane dig into the parent experience—the overwhelm, frustration, guilt, and worry that show up when we're raising complex kids, and why noticing our own reactivity (hello, SODA: shut down, offense, defense, avoid) is the first step to showing up differently. If you've ever wondered why you react the way you do, this one's for you. Hit play.

What to expect in this episode:

Why the parent experience—not the kid's—is often the missing piec
An introduction to SODA: the four common reactive patterns (Shut down, Offense, Defense, Avoid) and how to spot yours
The difference between being "aware," "alert," and "alarmed,” and why many parents live in alert without realizing it
Why uncertainty, even more than the actual problem, is often what makes parents feel unsafe
A reminder that feeling alone in this struggle is a signal worth paying attention to, not a truth about your situation

Download free guide: Top 12 Tips To Help Your Complex Kids
Connect with ImpactParents:

EP279 Why Won't My ADHD Kid Just Start? A New Theory of Motivation Aug 12, 2026

Show notes

Ever look at your ADHD kid and think, "I know they want to do well — so why can't they just get started?" This week, cognitive engineer and ADHD coach Jeff Copper joins Elaine to break down a completely new way of understanding motivation and executive function. You'll learn why "unmotivated" is almost always the wrong word, why extra time isn't the accommodation you think it is, and why talking things through with your kid might be one of the most powerful tools you have. This one's dense — you may want to listen twice. Tap in for a total shift in how you see effort, motivation, and what your ADHD kid is actually up against.

What to expect in this episode:

A new way to understand ADHD motivation using Dr. Russell Barkley's two-brain model
Why calling executive function an "impairment" can actually reduce shame, not increase it
Why rewards and willpower fall short as long-term motivation strategies
Why extra time isn't the relief parents assume it is
Why talking things through with your kid is a real, research-backed accommodation

About Jeff Copper

Jeff Copper is a cognitive engineer and ADHD coach. He is founder of DIG Coaching Practice, Attention Talk Radio, and Attention Talk Video. He holds professional designations from ICF and PAAC and certifications from ADD Coach Academy and Coaches Training Institute. A member of ADDA, CHADD, ACO, PAAC, and ICF, Jeff developed Cognitive Ergonomics From the Inside Out®, a radical departure from the current ADHD intervention paradigm. In recognition of his contributions, he received the ACO's 2022 Professional Excellence Award. Jeff continues to innovate in attention coaching, helping individuals understand and manage their ADHD challenges.

Connect with Jeff

Facebook (optional): https://www.facebook.com/adultaddcoach
X Handle (optional) https://twitter.com/digcoaching
Linkedin (optional) https://www.linkedin.com/in/jeff-copper
Instagram (optional) https://instagram.com/dig.coaching

Connect with Impact Parents:

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/impactparents
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/ImpactParents
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/impactparents

EP278 High-Conflict Divorce to Co-Parenting Peace: A Real Success Story Aug 05, 2026

Show notes

High-conflict divorce can feel like a life sentence — especially when you're fighting over your child's health and well-being, and neither parent will budge. In this episode, Elaine sits down with Alanah, an attorney and civil rights advocate, who shares how she transformed a near-litigation co-parenting nightmare into a working relationship built on mutual respect and collaboration. Alanah breaks down the exact shift that changed everything — and what she did when her co-parent wasn't on board yet. If you've ever felt trapped in a conflict you can't get out of, this one's for you. Listen now and find out what's actually possible.

What to expect in this episode:

The parenting covenant strategy: How Alanah transformed a stack of legal pleadings into a clear, shared vision, and how to distill what you actually want from a conflict so you can start working toward it.
What to do when your co-parent isn't on board: Practical guidance on enrolling a resistant co-parent in a new vision without forcing it on them.
Why alignment beats agreement: The crucial difference between trying to agree on specifics and starting with what you both already share: your child's well-being.
Real-time coaching and "texting from the ledge": Why practicing new patterns in the middle of a real conflict, not just during a coaching session, is what makes change stick.
The shift from "have to" to "get to": How Alanah moved from feeling like a prisoner in her co-parenting dynamic to feeling genuinely liberated and what that shift actually required.

Download free guide: Top 12 Tips To Help Your Complex Kids
Connect with ImpactParents:

EP277 Why Systems Fail—And What Actually Works for Complex Kids Jul 29, 2026

Show notes

You’ve tried the systems recommended for helping complex kids—reward charts, planners, new morning routines—and they’re just not sticking for your kid. It isn’t that you’re using bad systems, it's that often we’re starting with the solution before we understand the problem. In this episode, Elaine and Diane unpack why systems and structures are the last piece of the parenting puzzle, not the first, and walk you through a practical, personalized approach to building routines that actually hold up for neurodiverse kids. Ready to stop guessing and start problem solving? This one's for you.

What to expect in this episode:

Why systems and structures come last in the ImpactParents model.
The real reason reward charts and planners only work some of the time.
How to problem-solve before you pick a system using real world scenarios and practical examples.
Why buy-in and ownership are essential for complex kids and how to get them on board without a power struggle.
The concept of "flexible structure": how to build routines that are solid enough to hold, but have enough give to survive a hard day.

Download free guide: Top 12 Tips To Help Your Complex Kids
Connect with ImpactParents:

EP276: Shifting Expectations for Complex Kids: How to Meet Them Where They Are Jul 22, 2026

Show notes

Are you holding your complex kid to expectations that weren't built for their brain? In this episode, Elaine Taylor-Klaus and Diane Dempster dig into one of the most misunderstood concepts in parenting neurodiverse kids: shifting expectations—not lowering or eliminating them. You'll learn why the gap between expectation and reality is the root of most conflicts, the reasons why your complex kid might be struggling to meet the bar you set, and what it means to meet your kid where they are. If you’re raising a kid with ADHD or executive function challenges, this one’s an essential listen. Tune in, then head to ImpactParents.com to find out how you can keep learning with Sanity School® for Parents.

What to expect in this episode:

The 30% rule explained: Kids with executive function challenges are often 30% behind peers developmentally, which translates to 3–5 years for younger kids and 8–10 years for young adults.
Shifting vs. lowering—they’re not the same thing: Understand the difference between abandoning your expectations and moving them to where your kid can actually reach them, then growing from there.
Every trigger starts with a gap: The space between what you expect and what your kid delivers is the root cause of most conflicts at home.
Process over outcome: Holding neurodiverse kids accountable to how they approach tasks (rather than just whether they finish them) is what really builds long-term capability and self-worth.
The collaborative piece: Setting expectations isn't something you do to your kid, it's something you do with them, and buy-in from your child is what makes the whole thing stick.

Download free guide: Top 12 Tips To Help Your Complex Kids
Connect with ImpactParents:

EP275: Positivity and Communication: The Second Cornerstone of Parenting Complex Kids Jul 15, 2026

Show notes

Being nice and being positive aren't the same thing—and if you're parenting a complex kid, that distinction matters. In this episode, Elaine Taylor-Klaus and Diane Dempster dig into the second Sanity School® cornerstone: positivity and communication. They cover why resilience more than intelligence influences success, what the "independence pyramid" is built on, and how the way you talk to your kid (and to yourself) shapes everything from relationships to self-regulation. It's part two of a four-part series. You can catch up on the first episode about activating your child’s brain and follow along so you don't miss the rest.

What to expect in this episode:

Why being positive isn't the same as being nice, and why that distinction matters for parenting complex kids
Why resilience, not intelligence, is the biggest predictor of a kid's long-term success, and how to build it
What the "independence pyramid" is, and why relationship, trust, and communication have to come in that order
How tone, timing, and what your kid actually hears (versus what you meant) shape every conversation
Why self-talk is a form of self-care, and how changing your own internal dialogue changes how you show up for your kid

Download free guide: Top 12 Tips To Help Your Complex Kids

Connect with ImpactParents:

EP274: How to Activate Your ADHD Child's Brain: Executive Function, Emotions & Motivation Jul 08, 2026

Show notes

Your brilliant kid can't get out the door in the morning, falls apart over homework, and goes from fine to completely overwhelmed in seconds. You want to help them out, but it feels like you've tried everything and nothing sticks. In this episode of Parenting with Impact, Elaine Taylor-Klaus and Diane Dempster break down what's actually happening in your child's brain, and why executive function, emotional regulation, and motivation are the three most important things every parent of a neurodiverse kid needs to understand. This is part one of a four-episode series built on the framework ImpactParents has been teaching with their Sanity School® program for 15 years. If you're tired of jumping from strategy to strategy without meaningful progress, this episode gives you a powerful place to start. Hit follow so you don't miss what's coming next.

What to expect in this episode:

Why "activating the brain" is the foundation for everything else you'll do as a parent of a complex or neurodiverse kid—and what it actually means day-to-day
The real reason your brilliant child struggles to organize, plan, or follow through (it has nothing to do with how smart they are, it just requires a completely different part of the brain)
What executive function looks like in daily life, and how Dr. Thomas E. Brown's six-area model helps you pinpoint exactly where your child needs support
Why your child probably isn't really going from "zero to a hundred"—and what's actually happening in their nervous system before the meltdown
Why your child isn't unmotivated — they're differently wired, and understanding that changes everything about how you show up for them

Download free guide: Top 12 Tips To Help Your Complex Kids
Connect with ImpactParents:

EP273: Parenting Ahead of the Problem with Dr. Ross Greene Jul 01, 2026

Show notes

When rewards, punishments, and consequences aren’t working, it may be time to ask new questions. In this episode, Dr. Ross Greene explains why challenging behavior isn’t usually a sign of defiance or poor motivation, but a signal that a child is struggling with expectations they cannot yet meet. He introduces the Collaborative and Proactive Solutions mode and explains how shifting from behavior management to collaborative problem solving can reduce conflict, strengthen relationships, and help kids build the skills they need to succeed. Discover how changing the way you see challenging behavior can transform the way you support your child.

What to expect in this episode:

Why challenging behavior is often signals a struggle with skills rather than defiance
The difference between managing behaviors and addressing the causes behind them
The role of collaboration in helping kids build problem-solving skills
How proactive conversations can reduce power struggles and emotional blowups
What schools and families can do differently to better support complex kids

About Dr. Ross Greene

Ross is the originator of the Collaborative & Proactive Solutions (CPS) model, as described in his influential books The Explosive Child, Lost at School, Lost & Found, and Raising Human Beings, and the forthcoming The Kids Who Aren't Okay: The Urgent Case for Reimagining Support, Belonging, and Hope in Schools. He served on the faculty at Harvard Medical School for over 20 years, and is now an adjunct Professor in the Department of Psychology at Virginia Tech and in the Faculty of Science at The University of Technology Sydney in Australia. He is deeply involved in fundraising efforts at Lives in the Balance, CPS model projects, and Lives in the Balance documentaries and mini-documentaries.

Connect with Dr. Ross

Website: Lives in the Balance
Instagram: @livesinthebalance
YouTube: Lives in the Balance (Dr. Ross Greene)
Book: The Explosive Child by Greene, Ross W. | The Explosive Child by Ross Greene

The Explosive Child [Sixth Edition] by Greene PhD, Ross W.

The Kids Who Aren't Okay by Ross W. Greene Ph.D.

Get your FREE copy of 12 Key Coaching Tools for Parents at https://impactparents.com/gift.

Connect with Impact Parents:

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/impactparents
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/ImpactParents
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/impactparents

Sponsors

"Cognitive Ergonomics from the Inside Out" – A New ADHD Intervention

Do you recognize current ADHD interventions fall short? At DIG Coaching, we've developed a groundbreaking field of engineering called Cognitive Ergonomics from the Inside Out. Discover a fresh approach to ADHD care that looks beyond traditional methods.

Learn more at www.cognitive-ergonomics.com

EP272: How To Build the School Support Kids with ADHD Need to Thrive with Jenny Drennan Jun 24, 2026

Show notes

Getting your child through school should not feel like navigating a maze, but for many parents, it does. When learning differences, executive function challenges, or other school struggles are a factor, it can be hard to know which supports will actually work and how to find ones that will be a good fit. In this episode, educational therapist Jenny Drennan unpacks the differences among tutors, coaches, educational therapists, advocates, and other specialists, and shares what parents need to know before investing their time, energy, and resources. Get ready to cut through the confusion and discover how finding the right support can strengthen not only your child's growth, but your relationship with them.

What to expect in this episode:

The differences between tutoring, educational therapy, coaching, and school-based supports
What cognitive assessments reveal about how a child learns and struggles
Why executive function support requires more than just organizational tools
The role of authentic buy-in in determining a support’s success
How the parent-child relationship impacts learning and growth

About Jenny Drennan

Jenny Drennan is a Board-Certified Educational Therapist, Founder of WeThrive Learning, and a featured speaker. Her private practice specializes in supporting students with ADHD and math and language processing challenges. Drawing on best practices and the latest research, WeThrive Learning provides 1-1 tailored support for students and parents globally, taking into account their complex learning profiles. She is certified by ImpactParents as a Sanity School® behavior therapy program trainer. Her passion, work, and insights have earned her recognition as one of the top 10 most influential educators by MSN. Her contributions and presentations have also been featured on numerous podcasts, in organizations, at workshops, and in parent groups.

Connect with Jenny

Website: WeThrive Learning
Podcast: WeThrive Learning
Facebook Group: Parent Your ADHD Child with Confidence!

Get your FREE copy of 12 Key Coaching Tools for Parents at https://impactparents.com/gift.

Connect with Impact Parents:

Instagram: https://www.instagram.com/impactparents
Facebook: https://www.facebook.com/ImpactParents
LinkedIn: https://www.linkedin.com/company/impactparents

Sponsors

"Cognitive Ergonomics from the Inside Out" – A New ADHD Intervention

Do you recognize current ADHD interventions fall short? At DIG Coaching, we've developed a groundbreaking field of engineering called Cognitive Ergonomics from the Inside Out. Discover a fresh approach to ADHD care that looks beyond traditional methods.

Learn more at www.cognitive-ergonomics.com

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