MILKLESS

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#48 Modern Parenting Frustration Jun 06, 2024

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We're going to start dropping a second episode each week! The format of the second episode is called "When = Now." The topic is something that's going on in our life right now. Less research, more gritty, less editing, and more free flowing. Take a listen and if it's your jam, then you just got 2x the MILKLESS in your life. (But if it's not for you and you like the regular episodes, we won't be offended if you skip over some or all of them).
Matt and Max talk about why we seem to be getting a little more frustrated with out kids than we like to be in 2024. Were our parents this intense? Is it the fact that in our quest to be perfect parents we inject an unneeded level of stress into the equation? Let's dive in.

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#47 Intervention vs. Letting the Kids Be w/Sam Stolper Jun 04, 2024

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We're always watching our kids to see how they're doing, and to make sure they get the help they need when they need it. But the question of if and when to intervene is seldom clearcut. Whether it's language development, physical or emotional well-being, or even just climbing up high on a counter - parents are constantly asking themselves whether this is the right time to get in there, or if it would be better to hang back and let the kid figure it out. Of course that equation gets even more complicated with two parents who don't necessarily share the same opinion. Max and Matt are joined by longtime friend Sam Stolper, who brought this topic to the podcast after navigating a couple of different "to intervene or not to intervene" situations with his wife. Of course, there's no one right answer to this question. We're more interested in how to approach the thought process. How do you engage in useful milestone-tracking while avoiding an anxious household? What are the right questions to ask when weighing the cost/benefit of a certain intervention? What are the biases that we as people bring to the equation, and do those leanings serve our kids? What's the best time to argue about it with your spouse? Probably when you've both had a couple of drinks when the in-laws are over, right? It's the Season 3 Premiere, y'all. Let's get it.

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#46 Links in a Chain | An Ode to William F Williams Apr 30, 2024

Show notes

Just a little somethin' between seasons 2 & 3 of the show. Matt tells a story about his daughter, and about the man who told him - long before Matt had kids - that being a father is "the best thing you'll ever do."

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#45 This is 40 Apr 04, 2024

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Holy sh*t, The Boys are turning forty. This one's literally coming out on Max's 40th birthday. Is it just a number, or an opportunity to look at life in a whole new way? Maybe both? Maybe neither? Maybe it's what you make of it. But all the research shows that having a positive perspective on getting older makes the back half of your life a whole lot better (not to mention healthier and longer). So, how do we get there, in spite of the aching joints and inevitable humbling that life deals out? Matt and Max dive in, looking for ways to embrace what's coming whether we like it or not. Also, they talk about death for a while, cause that's always a crowd-pleaser (apologies in advance). But it's one of our favorite episodes already. Let's do it!

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#44 Praise, Critique, and Confident Kids Who Aren’t Up Their Own Ass Mar 28, 2024

Show notes

Our kids spend a LOT of time looking to us to figure out how they're doing. Does this work? Am I not supposed to do this? Do people like it when I try this thing? It's a little bit terrifying how much power we as parents have in shaping not only what our kids see as positive or negative behavior, but in how they see themselves and their identity. That means praise and critique are a pretty big part of parenting. But not all praise is actually helpful, and not all criticism is constructive. Max and Matt dive in, starting from a few well-researched principals and then exploring all of the nuance and grey area that is actual, real-life parenting. If you like the episode, send praise to @milklesspodcast. For all criticism, contact @milklesscriticismfanpage.

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#43 On Health, Longevity, and Max Hiding Half a Bag of Cheez-Its in His Mouth Mar 14, 2024

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You heard it here first, y'all: eating healthy and exercising makes you live longer AND does wonders for your mental health. Oh, wait, literally everyone is already saying this? Well, then maybe we should talk about how the f*ck you get yourself to do it consistently - particularly with young kids. This is not something Max and Matt have mastered, which is exactly why it's not intolerable to listen to them talk about it... because aren't we all a little tired of six-packed influencer parents telling us how easy it is to get your twenty-year-old body back? This one's as much about trying to understand our relationship with our own bodies, as it is about ways to stay fit. And if that all sounds a little soft, well... maybe it is... but we also curse a lot.

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#42 Ten Things We Hate and Ways to Make Them Suck Less (Part 2) Mar 07, 2024

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If you haven't listened to Part 1, go back and start there at Episode #42. Look, not everything about being a parent is that awesome. We all know it. Let's just say it. Actually, let's make a list, and then hang out and holler about how mad we sometimes get about this stuff. Sounds great, actually. Carthadic. Let's do it. We might even figure out some things to try, see if we can't make it all go a little smoother. It's a Hot Takes, y'all. Ten things Matt and Max hate about parenting Part Deux.
Support Milkless by buying the best kids book ever (seriously). Matt wrote it, Max illustrated it. So if you like Milkless, your kids will love Violet Archer! For kids Aged 5-12

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#41 Ten Things We Hate and Ways to Make Them Suck Less (Part 1) Feb 29, 2024

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Look, not everything about being a parent is that awesome. We all know it. Let's just say it. Actually, let's make a list, and then hang out and holler about how mad we sometimes get about this stuff. Sounds great, actually. Carthadic. Let's do it. We might even figure out some things to try, see if we can't make it all go a little smoother. It's a Hot Takes, y'all. Ten things Matt and Max hate about parenting.
Support Milkless by buying the best kids book ever (seriously). Matt wrote it, Max illustrated it. So if you like Milkless, your kids will love Violet Archer! For kids Aged 5-12

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#40 On Phones: Mastering the Wonderful, Magical, Evil Robot in Our Pockets Feb 21, 2024

Show notes

First off, don’t worry. We’re not coming for your phones. We LOVE our phones! Also, without them, it would much, much harder for you to listen to this podcast. But then there’s this uncomfortable truth that nobody really wants to talk about... including The Boys. It might just maybe be possible that we're all waaaaay too connected to our devices, and it's really f*cking with our heads and frequently forcing its way into the middle of our relationship with our kids. But dude, it's 2024 - going full-on Amish isn't exactly an option for most of us. Also, SHUT UP! YOU DON'T KNOW ME! So, how do we create an intentional relationship with our mobile computers - where we can do our work, and manage our schedule, and enjoy all of life's modern conveniences and entertainment - but also be in control of the situation. Because, at least for Max and Matt, it too often feels like that little buzzing devil in their pocket is really the one in charge - and that just ain't right, for us or our kids. So take out your phone and press play... and find us on Insta! Oh boy. The irony is not lost on us.

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#39: About Violet Archer and The Case of the Purple Martin Feb 15, 2024

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Hey y'all, so Matt wrote a kids book! Violet Archer and the Case of the Purple Martin is an early chapter book (the first in a series) that follows the investigations of kid detective Violet Archer and her investigative partner, Baba - a Jack Russell Terrier. Max read the manuscript and freaked out over the writing. Then he spent the next 6 months (and hundreds of hours) moving mountains to get the kids mystery book published. And holy sh*t it just came out! This less-than-typical episode starts off as an interview - Max reading passages from the book and asking Matt about his creative process. But the format quickly morphs into a conversation on trying to empathize with your kids, recognizing the ways in which we as parents sometimes unwittingly make life harder for our small people, and the power of story to articulate the internal life of a child. We promise we’re not just log-rolling a book here. This is an interview with an Emmy-nominated writer/director - most of it about parenting - complete with the low-brow dumb humor that Max and Matt couldn’t avoid even if they wanted to.

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