Lizard People: Comedy and Conspiracy Theories

Latest Episodes:

George Soros Pays Protestors with Jake Regal Nov 20, 2020

Show notes

We're finally doing it! After many long years of this one going around on the internet and in your weird racist uncles email chains, we're finally covering the theory that George Soros pays people to go out and protest. And boy do we have the perfect guest for it - returning champ Jake Regal is pulling no punches. This week we're talking Jews, nazis, Jewish nazis, blood libel, regular libel, California's unemployment system, different kinds of heroin, and of course, Jews - sorry I mean globalists. It's truly one of our wildest episodes yet. Also if you feel like it don't forget to check out the merch! https://www.redbubble.com/people/LizardPeople/shop

Prehistoric Giants Existed In North America with Chris Vola Nov 13, 2020

Show notes

We got a bonafide author in the house folks! Chris Vola, creator of I Is For Illuminati: An A-Z Guide To Our Paranoid Times stopped by the Lizard Lair to walk us through one of the theories from his book. And boy is it a doozy - Chris has a lot of evidence to support the theory that in prehistoric pre-human times, giant proto-humans roamed what is now the USA, making giant axes and creating giant babies and generally just hanging out. Chris is a true expert and this is a deeply educational but also verrry fun ep - along the way we learn about the racist history of the Smithsonian, the roots of local journalism in the US, pre-colonization cities, bone thieves, and of course those freaky deaky Mormons. It's a treat!

The Government Controls The Weather with Tess Lynch Nov 06, 2020

Show notes

This week it might seem like the government can't even control an election. But of course, as we've learned time and again on this podcast, there are always deeper levels to what the government is actually doing. And this ep we're joined by the truly delightful podcaster Tess Lynch to learn about one thing the US government may be playing their 5D chess with - the weather! This grand unified theory ties together chem trails, hurricanes, polymers, big canons, climate change, Gore v Bush, Kate Bush, radio waves, slime videos, and way way more. Tess came prepared and you WILL learn something from this episode.

Halloween Is Satanic with Alison Stevenson Oct 30, 2020

Show notes

Alison Stevenson is back to tackle another Halloween conspiracy! This time, we get deep into the nitty gritty nasty truth - that Halloween is just an elaborate plot of Satan's to feed off the fear of children. Yes, Satan is real. Yes, he eats human fear via his junk. Yes, Alison and Katelyn learn a lot about Christianity from Alexis on this episode. If you're looking for a truly disgusting podcast episode about the spooky season, you've come to the right place.

90 Day Fiance Is Anti-Immigration Propaganda with Erika Curry Oct 23, 2020

Show notes

Truly we are living in the golden age of reality tv. But there's one show that stands out from the pack for the sheer weirdness of its participants, and it's built in ticking clock drama. That's right baby, this week we're learning what's really happening with 90 Day Fiance! Returning fave Erika Curry is here to explain the murky history behind the creation of the show, and it's possible real goal - to convince potential immigrants that Americans are garbage weirdos who will ruin your life. Katelyn and Alexis have a lot to learn about the show so expect recaps, reenactments, horrified yelping, and lots of drama. Plus an epic takedown of the Coast Guard.

Garfield Is A Soviet Plot with Joey Clift Oct 16, 2020

Show notes

The fat lazy cat that America can't get enough of - yep, we're talking about Pusheen! Just kidding, read the title, this episode is about Garfield. And we have none other than Garfield-meme-creator and tv writer Joey Clift on the mic to unravel a complex and shocking conspiracy theory that will change the way you see the beloved comic strip forever! Joey's pretty sure that the lasagna-loving feline is in fact the creation of Soviet Russia, a tool designed to dismantle the American economy by undermining the productiveness of the American worker. Did Garfield cause the economy to go into a tailspin more than once? Are spiders the only ones who spin webs? Is Nermal Alexandria Ocasio-Cortez? Who is the Benedict Arnold of syndicated comic strips? All these questions and more will be answered once you press play.

Hamilton Was Paid For By The CIA with Jacquis Neal Oct 09, 2020

Show notes

Nobody tell Lin-Manuel that we know!! This week our guest is the truly hilarious Jacquis Neal, and he's bringing a theory to the table that will shock you to your core. Because thing is, how does a musical about a bastard/orphan/ son of a whore and a Scotsman that no one's ever heard of go on to make a BILLION DOLLARS. Doesn't that seem weird to you? And how the show is obsessed with New York and banks and stuff? Doesn't that feel off??? Plus, how about the fact that Jacquis has first hand knowledge about the theatrical world and he says there's something fishy about the whole thing! The evidence is all here that the US government had a sneaky little hand in producing Hamilton and making sure it was a success, so you better not throw away your shot... to listen to this ep. Ugh sorry.

Van Gogh Was Murdered with Gabe Danon Oct 02, 2020

Show notes

Or is it pronounced Van Ghraacgh. Anyhoo, have you heard the one about how famous and beloved painter Vincent Van Gogh (from Starry Night and the Doctor Who episode) might have actually been murdered? Podcast producer extraordinaire Gabe Danon has a theory that Vinny didn't kill himself but was actually manslaughtered by a nasty little teen cowboy cosplayer who loved guns and bullying. While he explains that whole mess, Gabe and Katelyn also discuss yogurt, the terror of groups of teens, French dads, paint snacks, the fallibility of memory, and so much more. TW for suicide on this one babies, protect your neck!

Celebrity CIA Assets with Drew Spears Sep 25, 2020

Show notes

Celebs, they're just like us! Sometimes they're approached by a CIA handler who convinces them to carry out covert missions in areas of the world that diplomats can't access! Or so Drew Spears, comedian and podcast host, would have you think. Drew is pretty sure that most major stars (and lots of directors and gaffers too) are more or less working for the government as part-time assets, doing a little light spying wherever they go. Does The Rock have a little side hustle infiltrating the Middle East? When Tarantino takes a break from tweaking toes, is he reporting back to the Pentagon? You're gonna have to listen to find out!

The Lead-Crime Hypothesis with Winston Carter Sep 18, 2020

Show notes

And we're back! Ok so what if there were an explanation for why some people commit crimes. And what if the solution also explained why the US crime rates peaked in the 90's and has been falling ever since? And also, what if it were all the government's fault? Our guest this week is returning podcast pro Winston Carter, and he's got a theory that he's real passionate about that just may explain it all. Winston thinks that the answer to most of America's problems might be in our pipes, our paint chips, and our car exhaust. And you better believe that the Lead-Crime Hypothesis also explains George Bush, racist incarceration policies, and why parents just don't get it!