Stay ConnectedTwo bands who span the Atlantic, having a chat across the planet. Drafting jams from random challenges, fantastic banter while we’re at it. So just relax and watch our antics; it’s the pan-Atlantic Jam Mechanics
Jam Mechanics is a podcast hosted by Matt Johnston from The Narcissist Cookbook and Bug from Bug Hunter. Each week we’ll take on songwriting challenges and present our finished “demo” after a few hour break.
Copyright: © Jam Mechanics
The last proper episode of Season 2 goes back to the beginning. We get DeepBlueInk back in the Jam McCabin -- who doesn't love a good second chance??
Our Music: The Narcissist Cookbook
Bug Hunter
and our brand-new discord is here
-- SPOILERS BELOW --
---
Challenge: "A second chance you don't deserve"
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BUG'S SONG
Title: The Lighthouse
Lyrics:
On the tip of the island they left him to linger
in a lighthouse that clung to the cliff by its fingers
no comfort or company close to this coast
where he dwelled like a Gargoyle, guarding his post
They caught me red-handed, prepared my last meal
then gave me an out -- I took the deal
Stick to my station, keep my patrol
my only condition: don't hurt a soul
A hundred years pass me with no chance to slip
then on the darkened horizon -- I spotted a ship
With the darkness consuming, I lit up their path
there's only one route through all the rocks and the crags
I carved out a chance through the maze in the sea
leading the ship up to rest on the beach
The pilgrims abandoned their ship until dawn
but the tide never sleeps, when they woke it was gone
Without a ship to sail, the sailors advanced
to the valley below where they set up their camps
the timber was scarce here, which begged them to ask:
Do we use them for shelter or use them for rafts?
I watched from the ridge, an unreachable witness
A fly on the wall with a spider's ambitions
didn't surprise me at all that the first thing they did was
divide into camps, their first building: a prison
They dream of rescue, bless their hearts
I've watched them build and tear apart
Must now be years since they arrived
why must the heartless all survive?
Their children only know this place
They know I'm here but not my face
I pray they never seek me out
Oh God, the stores I could tell
They're not to blame, I wish them well
Oh God, the stories I could tell
Years on the island have settled the score
The village below me is violent no more
Then out of the sunset appears a new ship
My heart begins beating -- I have to act quick
with only one hope to correct for the night
I leapt to my senses and smashed out the light
By the light of the morning, there wasn't a sign
of the wreckage that washed away deep in the night
I swore to my captors I'd harm no one else
but not doing harm doesn't mean that I'll help
cause I've kissed the devil and can't be coerced
of all God's creations, this is the worst
with the lighthouse abandoned, I start to descend
you can find me among all the souls I've condemned
------------
MATT'S SONG
Title: Orchids
Lyrics:
I watch us from the dark garden
Through the living room windows
We are dancing
You are laughing
Revelling in the novelty
Of my abandon
This is new, you think, I see
Your frown encroaches on your smile
Or very old, you think
But the worry's just a weed
We spin around the room
I am rooted in the flowerbed
And you are crying laughing now
And I'm just trying not to trample on the orchids
Midnight
it begins to rain
I pull my jacket closer
And you are snuggled on the couch with me and dozing
Visibly relieved
And I'm relieved as well, in my way
I try to catch my eye
But there's just no getting through to me
This is Good, I think
Hiding From the lights of passing cars
If I can't live it
Well
I guess I'll watch it from afar
You are warm and you are happy
You are safe inside with me
And I'm just trying
I'm just trying not to trample on the orchids
And as you sleep
I watch me blinking
In the television light
And maybe get a little taller
A little younger round the eyes
This is new, I think
Or something very very old
But the worry's just a weed
And I retreat into the cold
This is good, I think
In a way, a second start
And if I can't live it
Well
I guess I'll watch it from afar
You are warm and you are happy
You are safe, at least I hope
And I'm just trying
I'm just trying
I'm just trying
Not to trample on the orchids
On Episode Nine, Matt continues being Home Alone 2: Lost in New York and targets the most famous New York M&M vendor. Heather Edgley joins us to get us thinking objectively!
Our Music: The Narcissist Cookbook
Bug Hunter
and our brand-new discord is here
-- SPOILERS FOR THIS EPISODE BELOW --
-----------------
Challenge: "From the perspective of an inanimate object"
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BUG'S SONG
Title: Sammy
Lyrics:
I am Sensitive, I know
I get riled up at the smallest things
and start screaming at the top of my lungs
I am working on it
but my job is very stressful
Holy shit is that a frozen pizza?
Time to cry my eyes out,
out of my mind with self-doubt
doubt you could live without me
me? I defend you proudly
cause I'm your last protector
Hi, my name is Sammy, I'm your over-sensitive smoke detector
Any locality may by ordinance require that smoke alarms
be installed in any building containing one or more dwelling units
in accordance with the uniform statewide building code
in other words: you need me
I know you're all frustrated by my beeping
but where there's smoke, there's fire
so where there might be smoke there MIGHT be fire
ok I'll work on it
but you've cooked that egg for 20 seconds!!!
Time to cry my eyes out, out of my mind with self-doubt
doubt you could live without me, me? I defend you proudly
I am your last protector
Hi, my name is Sammy, I'm your over-sensitive smoke detector
They say when God opens a door
he must also open a door on the other side of the room
just one door will not stop me from yelling
That's just how airflow works
that's just a little physics tip for you
inside a song inside a music podcast
but to calm me down... I just need... HER
Celia, Celia, Twirl for me love
no concealing how I'm feeling when I watch from above
Celia, Celia, this never gets old
they've learned to turn you on first before they look at the stove
Celia, Celia... the Ceiling Fan
Celia, Celia... the Ceiling Fan
(They're making bacon and I can't even fake a beep-beep because of you, Celia)
(It may be my low battery that's talking they ain't changing me 'till Autumn, Oh Celia)
(Learn good habits, change those batteries on daylight saving time, for realia)
(and while you're at it change your air filters too, basic home maintenance, celia)
-----------------
MATT'S SONG
Title: No Visitors
Lyrics:
no one visits me here but you i wish i could give you a little something in return under the silt, rocks and pillars of breezeblocks i was a queen once just like you in a temple on top of a hill on the rim of the woods and you want ask me something i can tell yeah i used to tell them stories in the vapour choking air and they kept me round because i told them what they want to hear now i call it like i see it so they took my crown away and i don't talk that much anymore these days cause no one visits me here but you no one visits me here but you tell me what do you see in me nobody's looked at me like you look at me for apollo knows how long i thought i needed fable and theatre for you trust me much at all but i guess a temple is wherever you go to find your god and you want to ask me something i can tell you don't need to keep your worries to yourself
On Episode Eight, our heroes get mentally prepared for the long road ahead. Robert Evans from Behind The Bastards gives us a prompt that make us one with the road, and Matt moves to Times Square.
Our Music: The Narcissist Cookbook
Bug Hunter
and our brand-new discord is here
-- SPOILERS FOR THIS EPISODE BELOW --
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Challenge: "Driving so long you become one with the road"
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BUG'S SONG
Title: On The Morning Commute
Lyrics:
On the Morning Commute
Sing along with the tune
I can throw on a podcast, a radio broadcast
all the things I can do on the morning commute
The beginning of the day is easy, I have a list of tasks to do
Get up, brush teeth, make toast, eat toast, make bed, don't eat bed
get dressed (required), comb hair (that one is optional)
plenty of structure...
and likewise my work day is a breeze
between meetings that should have been emails
and emails that protect me from meetings
I am stimulated all day, left and right and from every
corner of my cubicle, a beautiful hectic chaos that
keeps my mind racing and taken up with TODO's
but its that half hour in between...
that damn morning commute
Sing along with the tune
I can throw on a podcast, a radio broadcast
all the things I can do on the morning commute
You know, we don't use what scientists call our "Active" brain when we drive?
It's why we can hold conversations with passengers (or illegally as I found out, on cell phones)
or completely space out and realize 10 minutes and 12 miles down the road
And thats where you find me. Nowhere to run.
Can't even use my hands to defend myself
No amount of NPR or Arianna Grande can drown you out
no crosswords to keep my attention locked down, and you know it
You say "haha! your melatonin might've saved you last night, but you're
legally locked into conciousness now, 30 minutes locked in a Mazda
with nothing to properly stop ya, so you should buckle up bud, I've come here to haunt ya
So I snuck out last night and went to town like the Grinch of Suburbia
Climbing every traffic light and shaking the red and yellow glitter out of each one,
flipping every stop sign around to it's "Go-Side",
a couple well-place cones and now we have TWO northbound freeways and everyone else
going south can just use waze or something
Because I am getting this over with
I painted over all the lane dividers on the way to work
and had enough black paint leftover to paint a tunnel on a cliff as
a shortcut to shave off another seven minutes... funny, isn't it?
It took a drive to make me learn my limits
-----------------
MATT'S SONG
Title: White Line
Lyrics:
low fuel light's been on for days
i haven't seen another car
since i passed petrol station
must have a week or more
i punched in your address but
i don't think i remember you
objects in the mirror disappear as they slip out of view
i haven't stopped the car in so long i can't even tell
leave it long enough you turn in to somebody else
There's no other way to say this. Episode Seven is a special dark episode of Jam Mechanics. If you want to blame someone, blame Sam Damask of Grand Commander for his prompt! But we still have fun, and you will, too!
Jam Mechanics is a podcast hosted by Matt (The Narcissist Cookbook) and Bug (Bug Hunter) where we are challenged to write a song demo from scratch every episode. If you'd like downloadable files for this episode (and the demos we showed off), you can go to our Bandcamp or website to pay-what-you-want to support us! Our Music: The Narcissist Cookbook
and our brand-new discord is here -- SPOILERS FOR THIS EPISODE BELOW --
-----------------
Challenge: "Resisting the Urge to inflict harm on someone who has wronged you"
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BUG'S SONG
Title: Not Your Fault, Kid
Lyrics:
It's not your fault, kid, I still love you
you're my baby brother
It's not your fault, kid, I still love you
you're my baby brother
I had a family: mom, dad, dog and and backyard
my own room a guitar
I was stuck on "F" and I couldn't get past it
and now I think it's stuck in the attic
or at dad's place, or maybe the storage box
that he got when he got kicked out
and that just happened to be, just happened to be
when you came around
It's not your fault, kid, I still love you
you're my baby brother
It's not your fault, kid, I still love you
you're my baby brother
but mom won't love you, so I hope that yours does
you've got her eyes, what a shortcut
and our dad's smile that I've barely seen yet
at least its absent every other weekend
when I'm dropped off and lobbed in the corner spot
on a cot set up in your room
how'd this happen to me, this happened to me because
because of you
It's not your fault, kid, I still love you
you're my baby brother
It's not your fault, kid, I still love you
you're my...
but you're not a text on his phone left unguarded
you're not a hotel charged to the family card you're not
even them caught in the act, you were 9 months past
now you can't be ignored or talked out
you just happen to be, just happen to be
the proof that knocked us down
If I seem shut down and muted thats just what I've found is easiest
but I've changed so much can't tell what's me and what's now ship of theseus
If I seem shut down and muted thats just what I've found is easiest
but I've changed so much can't tell what's me and what's now ship of theseus
It's not your fault, kid, I still love you
you're my baby brother
-----------------
MATT'S SONG
Title: The Family Dog
Lyrics:
okay
are you done
i've been over here biting my tongue
let me just catch my breath
really swill this blood around
let it get
into every gap in between my teeth
every cavity from the years of sweetness
you forcefed me
i swallowed it all with a thank you and smile
not so pretty anymore am i
what's the matter baby, you look like
you got your face chewed off by the family dog
I'm only playing, and it's cute that you
Think this is really the worst I could do
I never know what I can chew until I've bitten it off
So make your next move
Carefully
Don't set off my instincts
Oh the things
I could say
light the fuse on the bomb in your brain
Give a wink
Take a bow
And let you take the win
walk away
when the fuse burns down
in a year from now
it'd blow and your skull would be hollowed out
I know you better than anyone ever has
I know how to take you down
But
I won't
not so pretty anymore am i
what's the matter baby, you look like
you got your face chewed off by the family dog
I'm only playing, and it's cute that you
Think this is really the worst I could do
I never know what I can chew until I've bitten it off
So make your next move
Carefully
Don't set off my instincts
On Episode 6 we get tripped up on cantrips before Joshua David MG gives us a songwriting prompt that'll make you ask: Did they just write the songs of the summer??? If you'd like downloadable files for this episode (and the demos we showed off), you can go to our Bandcamp or website to pay-what-you-want to support us!
and our brand-new discord is here
Challenge: "Did I just write the song of the summer???"
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BUG'S SONG
Title: Loud and Clear
Lyrics:
You're playin' DJ on our road trip and my ears are going numb
It's taking every bit of patience not to mute it with my thumb
maybe pretend that it malfunctioned and I'll fix it when we stop
but then you say "this one's my favorite" and you crank the volume knob
Why do you like this stuff, I haven't got a clue
what made a middle class big city girl like only country tunes
you don't square dance in your Daisy Dukes or line up in your boots
and you you ain't ever seen the inside of a country town saloon
I've tried to give it all a chance, I promise you I did
but I can't tell when one song ends and when the next hit song begins
twenty minutes in... lets just call it what it is
every hit song of the summer sounds a little bit like this:
a big bar crowd sing-a-long
a four-chord kinda country song
where the chorus always mentions beer
and the title, the title hits loud and clear
Its always so repetitive, they've got nothing to say
every aspect is generic, every lyric feels cliché
I respect the men and women and the instruments they play
but the hacks that they are backing have put all their skills to waste
cause the stars are all so similar, so handsome, could it be
another well-connected white boy up and moved to Tennessee
Has a network out in Nashville, plays a chord or two or three
add a fourth and ride a horse and you can end up on TV singin'
But did you ever think...
[See website for remaining lyrics!]
-----------------
MATT'S SONG
Title: Comparing Yourself to a Sillhouette
Lyrics:
Amelia was born on a saturday night
in the heat of july in the heart of america
and while the city slept, her mother showed her the sky
and speckles of starlight settled on her eyes and little Amelia Earhart knew one day she would fly
No that's not what happened
Can someone tell me why we obsessively mythologise real people, real lives like this
Like no one truly exists unless they live between the lines
of a fairy story someone writes?
Is it not enough for someone just to have lived, you know?
And to have lived extraordinarily?
Amelia 'melia, please
Come back to earth some time
I'm dangling here by a wire
And it doesn't feel like flying.
Do you think jesus understood that it wasn't enough to be a good man?
To be wise and patient and kind?
Do you think he knew that in order for his message to outlive him he would have to be canonised, and to be canonised he would have to die before his time?
Or was that narrative thrust upon him
Against his will
By a disciple who loved the message more than the man
And who knew that humans don't trust humans
We trust gods
And so this all too human friend of his would have to
Whether he wanted to or not
Become a god
Or be forgotten
And here I am, trying to be the best version of me that I can
Comparing myself to these silhouettes who
In the way they're presented at least
Didn't exist
Thinking that because I don't have a narrative
Because you couldn't project my story on the screen
That somehow makes me less real
And the thing is
I don't think I'm accepting that
I think i'm trying to turn myself into a story
To see myself as I see them
As only a silhouette
On Episode 5, we record an episode in the same room for the FIRST TIME EVER. Come listen to us reminisce about the tour with PapaBug and rank all our favorite moments (Bug even reveals his favorite fan!!). Oh, and we write some songs, too!
Jam Mechanics is a podcast hosted by Matt (The Narcissist Cookbook) and Bug (Bug Hunter) where we are challenged to write a song demo from scratch every episode. If you'd like downloadable files for this episode (and the demos we showed off), you can go to our Bandcamp or website to pay-what-you-want to support us! Our Music: The Narcissist Cookbook
and our brand-new discord is here -- SPOILERS FOR THIS EPISODE BELOW --
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Challenge: "Get Ranked"
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BUG'S SONG
Title: First and Second
Lyrics:
I wanna tell all my friends about you
to tell my mom, who will tell my dad
to find the best damn parts about this
and celebrate the things I have... but I can't
When I was kid at the dinner table
my parents would make us make a thankful list
the top 3 things about our day
and I was always just the worst at this
Some days it was simple but most days it was difficult
my disposition leaned a bit more pessimist than typical
its hard to get excited, like if life finds out I like it
I will lose it, yeah its stupid and its superstitious
So when you ask me the top 3 things
I love about this, I still freeze up
I probably look like a well-fed snake
as I choke so hard on that softball toss
I should just say "hell with it", maybe just embellish it
"your laugh, your eyes, your smile" but I know I'm barely sellin it
its hard to get excited, if life finds out I like it
I will lose it, yeah its stupid, I just wanna
tell all my friends about you
to tell my mom, who will tell my dad
to find the best damn parts about this
and celebrate the things I have... but I can't
Why am I like this?
Why can't I admit everything's going well
Why do I hide it?
Hide all my joy in this bone-colored shell
So I thought and I thought of my top 3 but its something I just couldn't do
so here's my top 2...
I'm tellin all my friends about you
I told my mom (who told my dad)
So here's the top 2 parts about this love
they're the first and second half
I'm tellin all my friends about you
you told your mom I'm not thar bad
So here's the top 2 parts about this love
they're the first and second half
the top 2 parts about this love
is the first and second, the first and second half
-----------------
MATT'S SONG
Title: The Great Pacific Garbage Patch
Lyrics:
I listed all my flaws in order
Starting from the least of them
The ones you might not even notice
Bedbugs scattering for cover when
the light goes on i just react,
it isn't evidence of sentience or anything like that
miseryguts
shut up inside my castle
overweight and
undersentimental
manic phases, chronic depression
what a shame that no one will ever...
I listed all my flaws in order
So you'd know what to expect
The ones that chafe your soul
Until the day your perfect patience starts to crack
i am a rock
i am an island
i'm the great pacific garbage patch
forget about
forgetting your birthday
i won't remember your first name
constantly expecting the worst
so i can say that i saw it coming
miseryguts
shut up inside my castle
overweight and
undersentimental
manic phases, chronic depression
what a shame that no one will miss him
On Episode 4, we get some Bug lore and catchup with our friend Spence Hood. This award-revoking episode covers the full spectrum -- from cowboy to vampire
Jam Mechanics is a podcast hosted by Matt (The Narcissist Cookbook) and Bug (Bug Hunter) where we are challenged to write a song demo from scratch every episode. If you'd like downloadable files for this episode (and the demos we showed off), you can go to our Bandcamp or website to pay-what-you-want to support us! Our Music: The Narcissist Cookbook
and our brand-new discord is here -- SPOILERS FOR THIS EPISODE BELOW --
-----------------
Challenge: "Your Nobel Prize has been revoked because..."
-----------------
BUG'S SONG
Title: Dynamite
Lyrics:
There's gold in them there hills, get your shovels and dig!
we're sittin on a jackpot that'll make us all rich
if we just stick to our lot and never give up our spot
we can give our kids lives not a one of us got
Pack it once, check it twice, pack it in, pack it tight
light the fuse, time to move, hit the BOOM... dynamite
But boys we got company... they only come out at night
leave no trace on the dead but a couple of bites
there's no telling where they came from, or got here or why
and now they're swarming the hills but they were never invited
and our mines are getting drained while we sleep in our tents
if we send out a scout we never see 'em again
they won't duel us at noon or try to fight us like men
but they don't like the sun, so we'll bring it to them
[Chorus]
Ah, well I'll be damned, looks like we found a weak spot, guys
I guess their fangs don't work when their brains get fried
I might've guessed that fact, now they're the ones surprised
as we scatter the bats before the sun can rise
But they ain't dead yet, I guess technically they're undead yes
but you get what I'm settin: there's a few left yet
and our side is still dwindlin', we've too lost friends
some of the best damn cowboys you'd ever met
I've got one last stick that I've yet to light
i gotta bait the rest out, hit the timing just right
cause our guns don't work, devil knows we've tried
here they come, here's my shot
here's your nobel prize
-----------------
MATT'S SONG
Title: Peek at the Ending
Lyrics:
so listen we've been talking this machine that you've been building's got a problem that we couldn't foresee
i guess we all sometimes get blinded by the miracles of science, but we should have looked before we leaped
we're not saying you're not gifted, or that you didn't deserve it, this award that's sitting on your desk
but it's bad for the brand to be attached to man who found a way to predict everyone's death
what do you mean
i'll hydroplane on the highway
skid and careen into a toyota camry
why would you say that when i'm trying to help you
that's pretty fucked up man i don't know what to tell you
would you wanna know how you're gonna goooooo
if you like to peek at the ending
way before time let me recommend my machine
it's still in beta and the patent is pending
check the whiteboard, cause i've been workshopping a name
DEATH THING
you know what, no wrong answers
hello sir are you the creator of the thingamabob that everybody's talking about
you know the whatchamacallit, the thing that fits in your pocket, THE DEATHALISER why are you writing that down
it seems like the readings that it's reeling out are really not quite as accurate as you make them sound
everyone in the city got the same exact reading and now everybody's trying to leave town
what do you mean
evaporate in a bomb blast
become a shadow and a pile of pure are
why would it say that, i'm trying to help you
that's pretty fucked up man i don't know what to tell you
would you wanna know how you're gonna goooooo
[Chorus]
DOOM KNOWER
DEMISE DEVICE
THE FATE MATRIX
listen i'd love to hire a marketing team to do this but i've lost like all my funding recently
It's Episode Three! We chat food (and pizza knives) with Jesse Gallaway and write two not-in-a-lifetime song demos!
Jam Mechanics is a podcast hosted by Matt (The Narcissist Cookbook) and Bug (Bug Hunter) where we are challenged to write a song demo from scratch every episode. If you'd like downloadable files for this episode (and the demos we showed off), you can go to our Bandcamp or website to pay-what-you-want to support us! Our Music: The Narcissist Cookbook
and our brand-new discord is here and follow us on Instagram, YouTube, etc! Please share the show (and our music) with friends! -- SPOILERS FOR THIS EPISODE BELOW -- -----------------
Challenge: Not in this lifetime
----------------- BUG'S SONG Title: Crickets and Silence Lyrics:
I'm just a little guy, a little wooden guy a little puppet I know you know, you know how this story goes I was a little guy, a little wooden guy but I'm a real boy now and I am finding out that nothing could prepare me. I'm like Peter Parker's Pediatrician (in over my head and I admit it) with human flesh and skin and all the mess that comes with it I was young and dumb and now I'm stuck Dad, can you come pick me up?? I'm just a little guy, a little human guy applying bandages to manage, so damn easy to damage it that little wooden guy, that tough skinned kid could take a hit and keep running, this fragile man I'm becoming misses his 80-grit blanklet and the ocean right outside of my bedroom and making choices just to see where they led to but now adventures are a threat to every moment I get I look around for guidance, our bravest days behind us we'll never be so bold again, with mortal bones and fragile skin no I didn't expect to find this, it's like Willy Wonka's Wine Cellar yeah, I guess I should've known better should've known that growing up is forever but we can't go back I look around for guidance, our bravest days behind us we'll never be so bold again, with mortal bones and fragile skin I look around for guidance, but all I hear is crickets and silence
----------------- MATT'S SONG Title: The Nature of Forms Lyrics:
When the space between the spaces starts to strain When the puzzle pieces bend and don't quite fit in the same way When the molecules that make us lose their charge and break apart under the weight When the North star doesn't point north anymore When the constellations drift and leave us stranded on the shore When the suns have all gone supernova, freeze and then retreat into their cores If there is an after that comes after the before If after all of everything there's just a little something more And after all our time together we're both still on board What if plato had a point about ideals If the nature of a form is born in an elysian field And the parts of us that we call i could maybe one day recollide somewhere Then I will find you where ananke wound the spool At the source of all the rivers, at the end of all the worlds In the wreckage of the species, I will question every beast residing there If there is an after that comes after the before If there's some truth to all the stories I have mocked and sneered and scorned And after all our time together on this earth we're both still on board
On Episode Two, we catch up with Bug Hunter's drummer Kyle Hodgkinson to talk about college hijinks -- and get a couple of song prompts! Jam Mechanics is a podcast hosted by Matt (The Narcissist Cookbook) and Bug (Bug Hunter) where we are challenged to write a song demo from scratch every episode. If you'd like downloadable files for this episode (and the demos we showed off), you can go to our Bandcamp or website to pay-what-you-want to support us! Our Music: The Narcissist Cookbook Bug Hunter and our brand-new discord is here and follow us on Instagram, YouTube, etc! Please share the show (and our music) with friends! -- SPOILERS FOR THIS EPISODE BELOW -- ----------------- Challenge: Change one letter of one of the other's song ----------------- BUG'S SONG Title: Both Lyrics: Dear captain Stanley I hope this note finds me well I hope you're reading this tomorrow from inside my empty cell the bars won't budge at all and all the guards they watch me well oh Captain Stanley I just really have to say after I dodged you in dubai and cleared your checkpoint in LA I began to thing that you just liked to watch me get away which you'll be doing... Soon as I get this door unlocked well as soon as I get this bar removed or as soon as I bribe this guard outside I'm finally screwed! My Game to lose I was the best there ever was at what I did (but so were you) I'm finally screwed! I have no chance I am the fattest, slowest rat in a castle full of cats It came down to freedom or to gold I got caught 'cause I tried to choose both Oh captain Stanley I think you have proved your point this staring contest through the bars won't serve a purpose in this joint and the sniper pointed at me, well, is certainly a choice but Captain Stnaley you seem to forget There's a reason there's 100 million bounty on my head all the governments have sought me but no one has claimed me yet so as soon as I (pow!) well maybe if I (ping!) uh... oh... noooooo I'm finally screwed! Here comes the noose I was the best there ever was at what I did (but so were you) I'm finally screwed! I had my chance Now I'm the fattest, slowest rat in a castle full of cats A final fatal path forked in my road I got caught 'cause I tried to choose both ------------ MATT'S SONG Title: Piano Beacher Lyrics: driftwood body and razorclam keys sea glass pedals and mica dust shimmer and shine come sing with me i want to break you open like a scallopshell figure out what makes you sound so beautiful all i know are the simplest chords triads fifths and rootnotes, but you make them more come sing with me i want to peer inside you with a microscope you washed up here from god only knows where in perfect tune and i can't bear to not understand things so here i go once again you think i'd have learned it by now man some things shouldn't be figured out and by peeking behind every curtain you find sometimes you see what you shouldn't some remedies don't need a hammer some mysteries don't have an answer but when all you have is a scalpel then everything looks like a cadaver driftwood body and razorclam keys beach piano, all covered in seaweed and salt come sing with me i want to crack you open just to see your pearl i want to learn what makes you sound so beautiful you washed up here from god only knows where in perfect tune and i can't bear to not understand things so here i go once again you think i'd have thought to correct it you can't keep the frog and dissect it by cutting the guts out of everything all you get is blood on the carpet some remedies don't need a hammer some mysteries don't have an answer but when all you have is a scalpel then everything looks like a cadaver
And. We. Are. Back!
Jam Mechanics returns for season 2 with our first guest prompter (Our longtime collaborator and artist, DeepBlueInk!). In our first episode back we reveal the fate of Jam Mechanics Mansion (Castle?) and reflect on the ocean that separates our two co-hosts
Jam Mechanics is a podcast hosted by Matt (The Narcissist Cookbook) and Bug (Bug Hunter) where we are challenged to write a song demo from scratch every episode. If you'd like downloadable files for this episode (and the demos we showed off), you can go to our Bandcamp or website to pay-what-you-want to support us! Our Music: The Narcissist Cookbook
and our brand-new discord is here
and follow us on Instagram, YouTube, etc! Please share the show (and our music) with friends!
-- SPOILERS FOR THIS EPISODE BELOW --
-----------------
Challenge: Transatlanticism
-----------------
BUG'S SONG
Title: Agamemnon
Lyrics:
I am aboard the Agamemnon, we are laying down a line
It's gonna cross the ocean floor, the greatest project of our time
A telegraph from Newfoundland will reach the Irish Shores
but by by the time this note arrives you will not love me anymore
I am aboard the Agamemnon, laying cables in the sea
For the purpose of the president to parley with the queen
As for me, I've got this letter that I'll send you in the morn
but by the time this note arrives you will not love me anymore
You will not love me by the time you read this note
You told me you would wait if I had to go
I keep your photo in a locket to remind me of my home
but while aboard the Agamemnon I have so much time to dream
of a world where I can reach you with no middle-man between
And maybe when we're done I'll get my turn, as a reward
but I never got that chance, now you don't love me anymore
When I made it to Niagara, you didn't love me anymore
You will not love me by the time you read this note
You told me you would wait if I had to go
I think of you so often with no way to let you know
This is only the beginning, this simple cable in the sea
Soon we'll have radios and satellites and waves we cannot see
No one'll know the pain of loving one they cannot reach
I'd commandeer the Agamemnon and I'd sail it back to shore
it's just a faster way to learn that you don't love me anymore
so I'll keep laying this cable for the lovers not yet born
so that they may never hear "No, I don't love you anymore"
----------
MATT'S SONG
Title: The Tollbooth
Lyrics:
When Britain's national health service was launched in 1948 it set sail in the wake of the second world war when the country's citizens the upper and lower classes both the rich and the desperately poor had served together, side by side and the ones who survived the horrors came home demanding to no surprise more we did not fight, they said in our millions just for things to return to the way they were we didn't die they said in our hundreds of thousands just to save a country where the leading cause of death is poverty and perhaps for the first time in british history the aristocrats and the working class agreed on something largely that arming the nation and teaching them how to fight and die for what they believe in makes their demands somewhat more convincing and so barely three years after the soldiers had come home on july 5th, 1948 the british health system was torn out by the follicles and rebuilt in a new vision that it would be free at point of service, that no one, NO ONE, would be turned away or trapped into debt by lack of personal means that it would be available to everyone who walked through the doors of a hospital or a GP's office and that the well off wouldn't be able to skip the queue this was radical beyond comprehension a truly universal healthcare system doctors across the nation barred their doors and hired personal security ...
[Out of room! For full lyrics, visit www.jammechanics.com]
The Bug Hunter & The Narcissist Cookbook US tour kicks off in June 2024! You can find all the ticket dates and links right here: https://bughunterbug.com/collections/bug-hunter-and-the-narcissist-cookbook-2024-tour
We'll be back for SEASON 2 shortly -- Put May 20, 2024 on your calendar! The Jam Mechanics are coming back!
If you missed our theme song drop, Art is for Amateurs is on Spotify!
Make sure to follow us on Spotify, Instagram, Youtube, and hit our website to get downloads of all of our songs so far!
SEASON ONE IS DONE! Let's Celebrate by discussing YOUR favorites (and least favorites), taking audience questions, and showing off some old demos to put Jam Mechanics demos into perspective!
Jam Mechanics is a podcast hosted by Matt (The Narcissist Cookbook) and Bug (Bug Hunter) where we challenge each other to write a song demo from scratch every episode. If you'd like downloadable files for this episode (and the demos we showed off), you can go to our Bandcamp or website to pay-what-you-want to support us! Our Music: The Narcissist Cookbook
and our brand-new discord is here
and follow us on Instagram, YouTube, etc! Please share the show (and our music) with friends!
On Episode of Ten of Jam Mechanics, we have clearly never played never have I ever. Things come full circle for season 1 and we end things on a cliffhanger (or do we??) Jam Mechanics is a podcast hosted by Matt (The Narcissist Cookbook) and Bug (Bug Hunter) - SPOILERS FOR THIS EPISODE BELOW - BUG'S SONG Challenge: Cliffhanger Title: The Hook It started off as devil’s advocate to challenge all my views when every answer has a question it’s not hard to get confused this is the devil at his handsomest so hey, what can you do? If this clever devil’s accurate he might convince you too I found the Devil down in Richmond, he was fishing for some sins he was perched up on a cloud, I found him humming gospel hymns I says: You ain’t got a license, this is twice I’ve caught you here my indictments met with silence, he just beckons me come near He goes: watch the bobber in the water, down below the pole when a sinner takes the bait, all that's left to do is pull you can see the sweet relief on all the faces of their victims It’s a vicious job but I acknowledge I am quite addicted Then the pole was in my hand and I cast my hook out far, this is how it all began, this is how my spiral started 1,2,3… so we’d meet up every weekend at a different fishing spot hopping on another city, stayin’ a step ahead of God I didn’t wanna think of consequences were I ever caught the devil can be dangerous but no one crosses GOD we pulled criminals and bitter souls, abusers, crooks, and cons leaving every city better off before we both moved on It was thrilling, it was chilling, it was killing evil souls the methods were quite brutal but goddam, we got results We were packing up in Amsterdam and cleaning all our hooks I took a chance to count the bounties, now I wish I never looked I found a kid inside his bucket, what the hell, he’s barely eight! He said “he must’ve been a sinner, after all… he took the bait” I am an Angel I took an oath I am a danger, a savior, or both I don’t go fishin’ not anymore I haven’t seen the devil in 20 years or more so when I’m called into god’s office, told I have a new assignment there’s a lead on where he’s fishing and its up to me to find him I can’t confess that I can guess exactly where to look now its up to me if I or he will end up on the hook. MATT'S SONG Challenge: Cuban Baseball (via Wikiroulette!) Title: Over the Mountains to Santa Domingo i'm seven years old playing catch with my father in a baseball field in central havana the crowds have all left but the stadium lights are still on someone approaches and asks for his signature he smiles and he beckons me over says "you can have mine, but his will be worth more one day" this is the story he's writing i am the hero and he's watching me go over the sea to haiti over the mountains to santa domingo dreams around here are disloyal they'll run off and come true for somebody else well i don't know dad that's a strange way to tell me to leave and never come back i'm 15 years old, i just hit the home run that pushed my team over the line to the finals and everyone's cheering but he is the loudest of all i want us to go for a meal with my brothers but he knows a guy he wants me talk to drags me away to talk money and mansions and fame you think i don't wanna be all i can be with my whole heart? you think i don't wanna see every square inch of this world? i'm forty years old playing catch with my girl in a diamond we set up right in our back garden four out of five times our dog gets the ball before us my neighbours are trying to figure out where they recognise me from, hey weren't you once someone i just say, no, you must be thinking of my dad this is the story we're writing me and my daughter can be who we wanna be you still come over on sundays she runs for a hug when you park in the driveway sometimes when she's fallen asleep we go out and play catch in the yard and i know that that's a strange way to say i forgive you maybe one day i'll say it out loud
It's Episode NINE of Jam Mechanics. We learn about Matt's casual relationship with the 5-second rule and Bug forgets to come up with a prompt (don't worry, his wife bails him out!)
Jam Mechanics is a podcast hosted by Matt (The Narcissist Cookbook) and Bug (Bug Hunter) where we challenge each other to write a song demo from scratch every episode. If you'd like downloadable files for this episode (and the demos we showed off), you can go to our Bandcamp or website to pay-what-you-want to support us! Our Music: The Narcissist Cookbook
and our brand-new discord is here
and follow us on Instagram, YouTube, etc! Please share the show (and our music) with friends!
-- SPOILERS FOR THIS EPISODE BELOW --
-----------------
BUG'S SONG
Matt's Challenge: TV Theme song
Title: Kick and Spin
Lyrics:
Do you ever feel like a lil guy? like you have no control but somehow you’re still synchronized cuz life keeps spinnin’, spinnin’ and you keep kickin’, kickin’ mostly due to the metal rod thats going through your torso thats attached to three other dudes It’s Foosball! It don’t matter if you win all we do is kick and spin but mostly kick (but mostly spin) Try to pass to the goalie and you score on yourself try to pass up the field, oh no you scored on yourself then you finally score a goal but it ricochets off and you score on yourself It’s Foosball! It don’t matter if you win all we do is kick and spin but mostly kick (but mostly spin) Oh hey, didn’t see you there you’re probably wondering how I got here strapped to these three other dudes trapped in a perpetual game of soccer against different colored but functionally identical opponents Spinning clockwise into infinity forever… well… A witch trapped my soul in here, I used to be a lawyer, tell my wife I love her It’s foosball! where nobody has a name where it's just a silly game where we kick and spin all day It’s Foosball! It don’t matter if you win all we do is kick and spin but mostly kick (but mostly spin) Kick and Spin was taped in front of a studio audience of weird faceless mannequins starring Kickolas Cage and John Kraspinski
----------
MATT'S SONG
(Lady)Bug's Challenge: The Alpaca Can't see over the fence (and also, the alpaca can't jump)
Title: The Alpaca Song
Lyrics:
the alpaca can't see over the fence
the alpaca can't see over the fence
the alpaca can't see but he can hear all of his friends
the alpaca can't see over the fence
he could go over it
ALPACAS CAN'T JUMP
go under it
ALPACAS CAN'T DIG
go through it
ALPACAS AREN'T GHOSTS
go round it
UNFORTUNATELY THE FENCE IS
SURROUNDING THE ALPACA ON ALL SIDES
he could open the gate
THE GATE IS LOCKED
he could unlock the gate
HE DOESN'T HAVE A KEY
he could pick the lock
PICK IT WITH WHAT
a stalk of hay
THAT WAS A RHETORICAL QUESTION,
ALPACAS CAN'T PICK LOCKS THEY DON'T HAVE THUMBS
he could eat the fence
WAIT THAT'S NOT A BAD IDEA
try to eat the fence
HE'S EATING THE FENCE!
oh wow it's working!
OH NO IT'S NOT
why what happened
NOTHING IN PARTICULAR IT'S JUST THAT THERE IS A LOT OF FENCE
he could burn the fence
I said he could burn the fence
YEAH I HEARD YOU THE FIRST TIME
WHY DO YOU THINK HE'S LOCKED IN HERE IN THE FIRST PLACE
chorus
he could fake his death
OKAY
scream for help
OKAY
and when his friends come
MHM
they'll see him lying on the floor
ALRIGHT
he'll be covered in blood
WHERE'D HE GET THE BLOOD
the blood is from the farmer
OH MY GOD
and then when the gate is open
BURN THE FARM DOWN
it's working, it's working
they're coming to help him
the blood is convincing
they're opening the gate
they're sensed his trickery
but it's too late
the alpaca is free
the alpaca is freee
he tries to start a fire
but the farmer's not dead!
they're fighting, they're fighting!
he calls to his friends
the ones he betrayed
they won't save him
he only has once chance
he strikes a match
he tosses it
into the hay
the alpaca has gotten his revenge
In this episode, Matt shares some old band names, Bug talks about his burger preferences, and we spread the good news about the internet's saddest raccoon video. Oh, and we write some songs, too Jam Mechanics is a podcast hosted by Matt (The Narcissist Cookbook) and Bug (Bug Hunter) where we challenge each other to write a song demo from scratch every episode. If you'd like downloadable files for this episode (and the demos we showed off), you can go to our Bandcamp or website to pay-what-you-want to support us! Our Music: The Narcissist Cookbook Bug Hunter and our brand-new discord is here and follow us on Instagram, YouTube, etc! Please share the show (and our music) with friends! -- SPOILERS FOR THIS EPISODE BELOW -- ------------------- BUG'S SONG Matt's Challenge: And the Oscar goes to... Title: The Opera Lyrics: Let me tell you all a little ‘bout the theater if you wanna pack people deep in the seats you’re gonna plant seeds, play follow the leader lead’em to the end, breadcrumb, bird feeder they say sex sells but so does drama they’re glued to their seats despite the genre the crowd is not complex at all they love The Phantom, hate the opera The curtains dropped The camera’s stopped make ‘em drag you off the stage They’ve cut the lights so my advice: make ‘em drag you off the stage now you’re twenty minutes deep in your Oscar Speech you look down and the crowd’s all gone to sleep they all cut to commercials on repeat so you can drop the rehearsal, think on your feet You don’t need dialog, and I’ll posit this all your drama should all be ubiquitous if the scripts in Spanish, no me habla love the phantom, hate the opera The curtains dropped The camera’s stopped make ‘em drag you off the stage They’ve cut the lights so my advice: make ‘em drag you off the stage You’ve got your speech all written you can picture it now but your scripts not finished and you’re taking a bow you’ve got your mantlepiece polished and your suit clean pressed spending all that profit with no budget invested You’ve got your speech all written you can picture it now but your scripts not finished and you’re taking a bow you’ve got your speech all written but you’re playing pretend cuz the Oscar, it goes to The Oscar, it goes to your head ---------------------------- MATT'S SONG Bug's Challenge: Take a sad story and make it happy Title: Fresh Cement Lyrics: fresh cement brand new shoes you and i talking it through though we've spun this story ten thousand times these exact beats these exact lines on this exact corner of this exact street the movie reel spins endlessly the credits roll no cheers or claps and when we're done we run it back anyone would think we were rehearsing for something fresh cement on a soundstage the dialogue becomes cliché we hit our marks we play our roles but we do it now with our eyes closed it's like a dance but we don't touch a boxing match without the punch take a bow great work today see you tomorrow for the matinée anyone would think we were rehearsing for something i blink awake and it's my cue nothing's changed but something's new we're rushing now the reach the end and when we do it all begins no subtext now or metaphor you kick, i spit i scream, you roar and then it's done and all that's left is our footprints in fresh cement
Episode 7 finds Matt and Bug writing some 4-chord pop songs and talking hedgehogs, Aliens, and Dr. Who. Bug disappoints Reginald Kenneth Dwight in a big way.
Jam Mechanics is a podcast hosted by Matt (The Narcissist Cookbook) and Bug (Bug Hunter) where we challenge each other to write a song demo from scratch every episode. If you'd like downloadable files for this episode (and the demos we showed off), you can go to our Bandcamp or website to pay-what-you-want to support us! Our Music: The Narcissist Cookbook
and our brand-new discord is here
and follow us on Instagram, YouTube, etc! Please share the show (and our music) with friends!
-- SPOILERS FOR THIS EPISODE BELOW --
-------------------
BUG'S SONG
Matt's Challenge: BNE SZN (piano only!!)
Title: Season Your Beanie
Lyrics:
I’ll eat my hat if you make it I’m not mad I’m just candid and someone just had to say it there’s no path where you’re headed and you can act all offended I’m a realist and I feel its best you never pretended that there’s a chance in a million you can be handsome or brilliant but you’ll crash like all the others so you can call me the villain one day we’ll look back and laugh, I’ll get a pat on the back but if you make it with your music I will eat my hat Would like a salad on the side? we can sub it out for fries? We got a dad hat meal plan for 10.99 you can order a fedora that you’ll just adore we got a chef hat special, call it hat du jour Cuz I’ve got 30 milion reasons that can prove you wrong and 200 fans in london singing every damn song I’m rubbin salt in the wounds, just admit you’re defeated you can season your beanie, but you still gotta eat it you’d eat your hat if I made it so I snapback with a menu when you throw all that shade if you took a bite of brim and didn’t like how it tasted you should’ve sampled the plastic long before you beret-ed and hey, yeah, maybe you’re right a bit more often than not but you could choose to say nothing, it has no sticker or cost rubbin salt in the wounds to admit you’re defeated you can season your beanie but you still gotta eat it you can season your beanie but you still gotta eat it you can season your beanie but you still gotta eat it
----------------------------
MATT'S SONG
Bug's Challenge: Cthulu (Radio-Friendly)
Title: Get Deep Fried
Lyrics:
let's stay in bed all day we'll get away from here tomorrow if the monsters allow what did people ever talk about the television doesn't work right now sit with me beneath the nothing where the stars all used to be before they all went out they're in the hallway at our door they're in the walls they're in the floor looks like it's all gonna end right as we begin who called this son of a bitch half mile tall, man looks like a fish the deep one will swallow us all he can swallow my balls who spoke the summoning rite who's up for fresh calimari tonight the deep one? eat my ass more like get deep fried am i right hentai tentacles gonna kick him right in the genitals he's gonna be like "this is terrible" i'm gonna be like "you look edible" elder god from the ocean floor I bet you wish you could sleep some more i'm your paralysis demon got hooked and you can't stop screamin they're in the hallway at our door they're in the walls they're in the floor looks like their party's gonna end right as it begins
Happy New Year! On our 6th episode of Jam Mechanics, we go down memory lane (way, WAY down memory lane). Get your new Calendars pinned up and mark "Jam Mechanics" for every other Monday.
Jam Mechanics is a podcast hosted by Matt (The Narcissist Cookbook) and Bug (Bug Hunter) where we challenge each other to write a song demo from scratch every episode. If you'd like downloadable files for this episode (and the demos we showed off), you can go to our Bandcamp or website to pay-what-you-want to support us! Our Music: The Narcissist Cookbook
and our brand-new discord is here
and follow us on Instagram, YouTube, etc! Please share the show (and our music) with friends!
-- SPOILERS FOR THIS EPISODE BELOW --
-----------------
BUG'S SONG
Matt's Challenge: Your First Memory
Title: Memories
Lyrics:
There were roses in the garden My toys were on the lawn My brother rode a bicycle Watched closely by my mom I toddled off the patio I often wandered off And quickly get corralled by My sweetheart of a dog These are the details These are the memories These are the moments always cut from documentaries These are the details These are the memories That never stick I was just a baby in the backyard Learning one thing at a time The shapes and colors turning Into object ‘fore my eyes It was an early autumn evening The first I could recall I crunch the leaves beneath my feet My dad records it all These are the details These are the memories These are the moments always cut from documentaries These are the details These are the memories That never stick They called me in for dinner but Before I headed in They handed me a cup of kibble Filled up to the brim I toddled to the doghouse Thats when God, she hit record My first memory is getting all my shit rocked by a bird Can’t choose the details Can’t choose the memories Can’t choose the scars they leave so sudden, unexpectedly Can’t choose the details Can’t choose the memories I wish we weren’t so primed to focus on upsetting things Can’t choose the details Can’t choose the memories That seem to nest inside your head The awful details That form these memories But if I could instead I’d choose the details The little memories And make ‘em stick
----------
MATT'S SONG
Bug's Challenge: "Calendar"
Title: The Year of Confusion
Lyrics:
Uh sorry, Matt's notepad crashed and we didn't want to type them up again.
On the 5th episode of Jam Mechanics, we make amends to Bug for all the lost ice breakers. This is as close to a "Holiday Episode" as we get, and we almost got it right! Jam Mechanics is a podcast hosted by Matt (The Narcissist Cookbook) and Bug (Bug Hunter) where we challenge each other to write a song demo from scratch every episode. If you'd like downloadable files for this episode (and the demos we showed off), you can go to our Bandcamp or website to pay-what-you-want to support us! Our Music: The Narcissist Cookbook
and our brand-new discord is here
and follow us on Instagram, YouTube, etc! Please share the show (and our music) with friends!
-- SPOILERS FOR THIS EPISODE BELOW --
---------- BUG'S SONG Matt's challenge: First Contact (42 word max!)
Title: AlIen Lyrics: When I open up my phone, you're the first name on my list An Alien emoji next to your name and I wish When I open up my phone I wasn't forced to reminisce but when I open up my phone you're the first name on my list you're the first name on my list when I open up my phone the Typo from the time we met I chose to leave alone you're the first name on my list that will never phone home you're the first name on my list when I open up my phone The first contact on my list, when I open up my phone the reminder of the time we met, the name I never chose but AlIen, alphabetically will not leave me alone you're the first name on my list when I open up my phone -------
MATT'S SONG Bug's Challenge: Give me a (misunderstood) Christmas Song Title: A Christmisunderstaning Lyrics:
it's the moment of the midwinter
the time of yule
through a log on the fire
and let it burn
every crackle and spark will represent
a baby pig or a calf to be born next year
here he comes
across the sky
underneath cover of night
he knows who has been naughty
he knows who has been nice
he punishes the wicked
brings good tidings to the pure
so huddle up beside the fire
prepare for the coming of odin
lord of frenzy
weep for the coming of odin
it's december
25th and the children are playing with their new gifts
oh the light of joy in the eyes of a child
as the party winds down
as the wine runs dry
with snow on the ground
we remember the night of the virgin birth
happy birthday mithras
infant god
savior of the people
born from a rock
slayed a bull with your bare hands
so the souls of the sinful would be washed in the blood of the innocent
christmas trees were invented by the pagan celts
On the 4th episode of Jam Mechanics, Matt shares a man vs nature story for the ages and Bug goes outside his comfort zone. So, so far outside his comfort zone. Don't listen to this if you can't take criticism! We warned you! Jam Mechanics is a podcast hosted by Matt (The Narcissist Cookbook) and Bug (Bug Hunter) where we challenge each other to write a song demo from scratch every episode. If you'd like downloadable files for this episode (and the demos we showed off), you can go to our Bandcamp or website to pay-what-you-want to support us! Our Music: The Narcissist Cookbook
Bug Hunter and follow us on Instagram, YouTube, etc! Please share the show (and our music) with friends!
-- SPOILERS FOR THIS EPISODE BELOW --
---------- BUG'S SONG Matt's challenge: Stone. Cold. Diss. Track.
Title: Dissin' all my Listeners Lyrics: Look at you, bet you’re thinking that you’re all that “lately I’ve been really into indie rock and podcasts” Chronically online, paying top dollar for broadband people show you memes, you’re thinkin “I already saw that” Cool headphones! You’re right to keep it quiet cuz if I had your music taste I’d also try to hide it The crew is in the car, nows your chance to make it awkward the nights already over when its your turn for the Aux Chord I tried to warn you but I’m done with taking prisoners You’re in my target demo and I’m dissin’ all my listeners Hey cool tune, how’d you find it, kid? Did you pop into a record shop and dig for it? oh you let an algorithm make a playlist? cool you and every other zoomer in your local middle school and hey maybe they’re a talent and they kill it live oh, their show has the production of an open mic? we paid 25 bucks and you had to drag me, too to sit criss-cross and listen in a living room? Its not hard but I’ll try to make it simpler you’re in my target demo and I’m dissin all my listeners I hear you thinking that I’m comin off a bit harsh a little bit ungrateful to the one that got me this far should I apologize to all my audience or double down? this wouldn’t be a diss if I didn’t try to pop your bubble now You’re terrible! (at making me feel like I’m alone) You’re Awful! (cuz you drained your data playin’ me on your phone) You the worst at being critical when feedback’s all I want You’re mean (I mean you mean the world to me so thanks a lot) You needed me to knock you off your silly little perch you spend too damn much on my silly indie merch You’re enabling a dream, its irresponsible a grown ass man thinks that anything is possible?? call a cease fire, its all for show cuz I play until I win like this is rochambeau and I’m a rocker and your peace sign looks exactly like scissors you’re gonna get crushed cuz I’m dissin all my listeners -------
MATT'S SONG Bug's Challenge: You see that guy in the corner? He seems like a... Lion Title: We're all Enemies Here Lyrics:
hey welcome settle in i won't ask how you found the place we were are all blown here by different winds don't give me your name don't give me your story i've seen your face already that's all that's important pull up a chair i'll pour you a drink and i'll keep my eyes on the door that's what i do here i watch your back so you don't have to for a while don't give me your card don't give me your money i've seen your face already that's all that's important see that guy in the corner looks like a lion he fights for a living and he fights like he's dying you wanna have bad time tonight trying sneaking up behind him he took a dislike to a friend of mine, now i don't even recognise him you see that girl over there no, you didn't and if anyone ever comes asking bout a friend or daughter missing you just shake your head and send them over my way i'll make sure that nobody ever comes here asking round again don't give me that look like you're your own man i've seen your face already that's all that's important don't get any ideas we're all enemies here
On the 3rd episode of Jam Mechanics, we cement BUG's legacy forever. This one feels right out of a dream within a dream Jam Mechanics is a podcast hosted by Matt (The Narcissist Cookbook) and Bug (Bug Hunter) where we challenge each other to write a song demo from scratch every episode. If you'd like downloadable files for this episode (and the demos we showed off), you can go to our Bandcamp or website to pay-what-you-want to support us! Our Music: The Narcissist Cookbook
Bug Hunter and follow us on Instagram, YouTube, etc! Please share the show (and our music) with friends!
-- SPOILERS FOR THIS EPISODE BELOW --
---------- BUG'S SONG Matt's challenge: Songception
Title: Song Lyrics: I just woke up here
I am 7 seconds old
I go in your ears
I am exactly what you told me to be and I
I will never change or mould
At least not for long
You are my dad
I am your song
It’s been 30 seconds now and
Boy feels good to stretch these legs
Pick up the pace and run and jump
And see how far this road’ll take me
Oh hey, what’s that? I found this chord, oh please dad, can we keep it?
You say: song that there’s a minor chord, its only good for somber feelings
So I put it back down where it was
You teach me right from wrong
You are my dad
And I am your song
But look at me, a minute in
And now I’ve found some friends
They back me up, they make me fuller,
Act as perfect complements
And now people keep on stopping me
To tell me what I am
What this sound is all about
And what it means to all of them
I am anguish, I am heartache
I am unbearable to hear
I am closure, I am power,
I am brutally sincere
But dad you never told me I could make these people cry
I thought you brought me here so I could be something they like
You say you didn’t mean it, never wanted this for me, I may not
Be the song you meant to write, but I’m the one they need
The one they need
Sometimes you get it right, even if they take it wrong
You are my dad
But I’m their song -------
MATT'S SONG Bug's Challenge: The song must have the initials B.U.G. Title: Buried Under Gary Lyrics:
why do you come here they say
every summer
don't you have anywhere better to be
you arrive with the butterfly weed
blow into town like a cottonwood seed
something's buried under Gary Indiana
something's buried under Gary Indiana
there's blood on the lake shore
keening from the wild
haven't you felt it moving
deep in the soil
so i have coming for years
every summer
cause that's when the symptoms appear
ask your friends bout their prophetic dreams
ask your kids bout the shadows they've seen
seems like everyone but you's got a feeling
something's buried under Gary Indiana
something's buried under Gary Indiana
it'll swallow the steel mills
the lake's gonna boil
haven't you felt it crawling
deep in the soil
something's buried under Gary Indiana
something's buried under Gary Indiana
On the 2nd episode of Jam Mechanics, we learn a shocking fact about Matt, make the next hit TikTok Dance, and things get a little omnipotent. Jam Mechanics is a podcast hosted by Matt (The Narcissist Cookbook) and Bug (Bug Hunter) where we challenge each other to write a song demo from scratch every episode. If you'd like downloadable files for this episode (and the demos we showed off), you can go to our Bandcamp or website to pay-what-you-want to support us! Our Music: The Narcissist Cookbook
Bug Hunter and follow us on Instagram, YouTube, etc! Please share the show (and our music) with friends!
-- SPOILERS FOR THIS EPISODE BELOW --
---------- BUG'S SONG Matt's challenge: Write the national anthem for the proud nation of Bugtopia
Title: Pledge Allegiance Lyrics: If you don’t want to sing this song
Don’t feel compelled just to belong
Obligatory public vows shouldn’t make anybody proud
We don’t believe in faded ink
No shame updating how we think
Let’s circle back, no need to lock our constitution Google Doc
Don’t pledge allegiance to me, I
I’ve got no reason to be right
I’m not your King, I’ve not returned
I’ve got a million things to learn
We’re like a trilogy unwatched
2/3’s abandoned and simply dropped
We’ll never know the end,
I’ll bring the paper and the pen and try again
We’re okay living in the wings
Don’t need attention or what it brings
we’re all content just to let the kings
Fight back and forth over petty things
We’ll plant our flag and hope it grows
And if the cameras come we can strike a pose
If this life’s an anthem of perfect prose
We are the 2nd verse that nobody knows
[Chorus]
And we’ll shimmy to the left, shimmy shimmy to the left
Everybody shimmy shimmy on over to the left
And then we’ll shimmy to left, keep going to the left
It’d be super duper helpful if you’d shimmy to the left
It’d be great if you’d shimmy to left please, thank you
[Chorus] -------
MATT'S SONG Bug's Challenge: Accident? Title: Accident? Lyrics:
i was walking to work day
crossing the street you gotta look both ways i know
but today i just stepped out with my eyes closed
three narrow misses and a screaming driver
i made it safely to the other side and i open my notebook and i write "experiment 9: success" and underline it
yeah i think i'm immortal
the signs are becoming unignorable
it all started a week ago
i woke up with a weird feeling so i did what any reasonable person ought to do
jumped out the window barely caught a sprain
walked on the tracks and tried to stop a train
yeah i think i'm immortal
the signs are becoming unignorable
how else would you explain it
i'm god
i think i always knew
i'm god
you're not that sucks for you
i thought that i was special i guess i was
now all you motherfuckers better pray because i'm god
i'm god
my first commandment is all love songs are now about me
my second commandment is thou shalt not order in food without leaving some aside for me as offering
my third commandment is the workday now starts at 4pm
and finishes at 4.45pm
two days a week
My fourth commandment is the summer will never rise above a pleasant temperature, and i'm scottish so, prepare for cold weather
My fifth commandment is commands are hard to come up with, imma take a break
my sixth commandment is free healthcare for all, sorry, i should have thought of that sooner
my seventh commandment is vampires are real and they're sexyyy
my eighth commandment is we should probably defang the vampires, but i acknowledge that a lot of their sex appeal comes from how dangerous they are so
i dunno
leave that with me
my ninth commandment is no war, no famine, no poverty, no bloodsports, no long layovers, no disappointing endings to novels, no greenhouse gases, no mandatory mailing list signups, no hidden fees, no gods, no masters, no actually scrap that. you didn't write that down did you?
my tenth commandment is the vampires leave you alone unless you consent to be bitten
yeah i think that solves that problem
On our first episode of Jam Mechanics, we break the ice, introduce ourselves, and tell one of our favorite tour stories. Bug and Matt challenge each other to write a brand new song (from scratch!) in a three-hour window. Jam Mechanics is a podcast hosted by Matt (The Narcissist Cookbook) and Bug (Bug Hunter) where we challenge each other to write a song demo from scratch every episode. If you'd like downloadable files for this episode (and the demos we showed off), you can go to our Bandcamp or website to pay-what-you-want to support us! Our Music: The Narcissist Cookbook
Bug Hunter Feel free to reach out to us at: Both: hello@jammechanics.com Bug: bug@jammechanics.com Matt: tnc@jammechanics.com and follow us on Instagram, Tumblr, YouTube, and Spotify! Please share the show (and our music) with friends!
-- SPOILERS FOR THIS EPISODE BELOW --
MATT'S SONG Bug's Challenge: Write a song about the four elements. Cannot use the words: Fire, Water, Wind, Earth, Hot, Wet, Wind, Dirt Title: The World Yet to Come Lyrics: grab my winter coat and leave the door unlocked I'll be back before you know I'm gone cutting through the sidestreets with the alleycats and missing dogs whispers from the reservoir have kept me up buzzing lights impersonate the sun missives from the landfill to the west of town frozen condensation in my lungs and I will be back when the spell is cast I'll breeze through your door with my heart intact the crystals that form on the inside of our windows will fracture and come apart I'm waiting I'm waiting for sun the life of the world yet to come
---------------------
BUG'S SONG Matt's challenge: Write a song about this (random) Wikipedia page Title: Francesco Lyrics: Franceso is the mayor of a city by the shore its on the southern tip of Italy known for tuna fish and tourists he books a meeting, sends an email, poses for the local paper one more email, has that meeting, off to dinner with his neighbors that's Francesco Francesco, he was named after a saint called Padre Pio who reportedly fought demons, claimed he parlato con dio He says a prayer, goes to mass, and poses with a little wafer one more prayer, one more sip of wine then pranzo with his neighbors that's Francesco And though he’s not producing miracles or guiding wayward spirits homes I wonder if Francesco thinks about it yeah, I wonder if Francesco thinks about it. But in March of 241 BC the Roman and Phoenician Fleets began a battle in the sea just off the coast of Sicily So many bodies on the beach, they turned it red, now theirs to keep they built a tower on the hill, passed back and forth through history The Romans and Aragonese, the Normans and the Genoese but now it's ruled by Angelo who runs the gift shop at its feet and now I think about that abandoned fort the bodies stacked on that bloody shore how long it took to clear the port 2000 years of tug of war Now long after the Fall of Rome An office chair usurps the throne A modern mayor scrawls his name on permits for a loading zone It hasn’t always been this way it hasn’t always been this way and I wonder if Francesco thinks about it yeah I wonder if Francesco thinks about it
Jam Mechanics launches on October 23! Get ready for Bug (Bug Hunter) and Matt (The Narcissist Cookbook) to challenge each other to insanely specific (or frustratingly general) songwriting challenges every other week!
This excerpt comes from Episode One: Hot Wet Wind Dirt
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