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It’s Not Me, It’s You — Relationships
It’s Not Me, It’s You

A therapist couple explores and processes their own issues, disproving the misconception that therapists have their shit together and that their relationships are perfect.John Kim, aka The Angry Therapist, is a licensed marriage and family therapist and best selling author of “I Used To Be A Miserable F*ck” and “Single. On Purpose.” Vanessa Bennett is a licensed marriage and family therapist, codependency and mindfulness coach. They both have private practices and live in Altadena, California, where they are raising a baby and two chickens.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Copyright: © John Kim and Vanessa Bennett

Latest Episodes:

Ep 9 The Relationship Dance Feb 08, 2021

Show notes

So many relationship dances, so little time: Avoidant/Anxious, Overfunctioner/Underfunctioner, CODA/Compulsive, Enabler/Enabled. We dive into how we are always trying to become more aware when the cycles start and old patterns take over, and how we can work to break them through naming them.

Please rate and review if you feel like this is valuable and want to help us help others.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Ep 8 Rewiring Through Love Jan 25, 2021

Show notes

We get into the importance of feeling an experience or a change in your habits, behaviors or needs in your body - having a full system experience - in order for you to eventually rewire your brain and make the change stick. We also talk about some personal examples where we have felt the integration happening in real time.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Ep 7 Our Love Lessons Jan 11, 2021

Show notes

In this episode we each go through 3 love lessons we’ve learned on our journeys. Some learned through past love experiences and some new lessons learned with each other.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Ep 6 Reflections 2020 Dec 28, 2020

Show notes

This episode is part review of all the crazy things that happened this year, part learnings that came from those experiences, and part excitement for what’s to come. Thank you for being on this journey with us so far, and here’s to 2021!

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Ep 5 Finding Beauty in the Contrast Dec 14, 2020

Show notes

In this episode, we talk about the double edged sword that is our contrasting personalities. The things we love about each other are also the same things that can activate the shit out of us. How do we continue to remind ourselves that our differences can actually be what helps us stretch and the relationship go deeper?

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Ep 4 How Our Stars Line Up Dec 07, 2020

Show notes

In this episode we take a look at our star charts and how they both align as well as conflict. We know, we know, but trust us you can actually learn so much from doing a deep dive into this stuff. We talk through how our inner emotional worlds are almost the exact opposite and how differences like this can make or break us depending on how much we understand, empathize, and adjust our expectations accordingly

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Ep 3 How Our Codependency Shows Up Nov 30, 2020

Show notes

We take a different approach in this episode with a deep dive into codependency and how it affects our relationship. In working through her own codependency, as well as with clients who almost all struggle in some way or another, Vanessa has made it a personal mission to speak openly with whoever will listen about the different ways it can show up.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Ep 2 The Whale Under the Water Nov 23, 2020

Show notes

In this episode, John and Vanessa explore what’s happening underneath their relationship. John not feeling desired, Vanessa not feeling good enough, and patterns they were not aware of.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

Ep 1 The Three Year Itch Nov 16, 2020

Show notes

Welcome to It’s Not Me, It’s You - the podcast. In this episode, Vanessa and John explore the evolution of their relationship, love languages, how flirting differently can mean we miss each other, and John’s avoidance of his 3 year relationship pattern.

Hosted on Acast. See acast.com/privacy for more information.

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