I Shouldn't Have Had Kids - TopPodcast.com

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I Spell Stress C-O-V-I-D – 23 May 04, 2020

Show notes

As if raising kids wasn't stressful enough: let's layer on a pandemic while we're at it. Then ask parents to work, teach, cook and discipline all at the same time. Oh, and don't forget the dog. The dog must have a walk.
As the pandemic wears on, parents are beginning to implode like faulty explosives in an abandoned mine field. And you know who has to walk through that minefield? The kids.
What do our children do with the stress they experience during a traumatic worldwide event like this? If you ask the experts, they'll all tell you the same thing: Kids look to the example their parents set and follow suit. Oh, dear god. Our poor boys.
If anyone can find the humor in these dark days, it's the hosts of I Shouldn't Have Had Kids. Irreverent, thoughtful, and funny-as-hell, Bonnie and Ellen get what it's like to parent—even when the shrapnel is falling all around them.
Links
Hilarious Website: McSweeney's Internet Tendency
YouTube: Wes Tank Raps Dr. Seuss
Explore's Animal Live Cams: The Eaglets!
Personality Quiz for Your Kids: 16 Personalities

Find all episodes of I Shouldn't Have Had Kids wherever you get your podcasts
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ishouldnthavehadkids@gmail.com

Bow Down to Teachers – 22 Apr 27, 2020

Show notes

This week's episode is an ode to the Mighty Teacher. Most of us didn't really understand just how essential these hard-working men and women were to our kids, our daily routine, and our ever-loving parental sanity until COVID-19 hit.
Without the support of teachers, we parents have been left to home school and drink too much wine. TBH, alcohol really doesn't help solve for n—but it sure takes the sting out of realizing your teen is smarter than you.
On episode 22, hear stories about remarkable teachers, find out why Bonnie's childhood nickname was "Fingers," and listen to the unbelievable story of how one of Ellen's favorite teachers was nearly murdered by her husband. He tried to poison her with cyanide! Ellen's teacher survived, but two others in Washington state weren't so lucky. The kicker is that Ellen's mom helped solve the murder mystery!
We'll keep you laughing through these long, hard shelter-in-home days with irreverent stories about parenting. Word of warning, however. We tend to swear like sailors.
Links
YouTube video: 1980s Keytar Riffs!
New York Times Article: The Attempted Murder of Ellen’s Teacher
Find all episodes of I Shouldn't Have Had Kids wherever you get your podcasts
Buzzsprout
Apple Podcasts
Spotify
Follow us on social media!
Instagram @ishouldnthavehadkids
Facebook ishouldnthavehadkids
Twitter @SHHKids
Or, email us :)
ishouldnthavehadkids@gmail.com

Blended Weddings – 21 Apr 20, 2020

Show notes

Planning a wedding typically means making a boatload of decisions in rapid-fire succession. When you're a blended family, however, you can add an additional layer of complexity to the situation. Here are the kinds of extra questions we had to deal with when we said our "I do's":

Since it's our second time around, should we have a big, white wedding or go low-key?
Will our guests be freaky that ours is a same-sex wedding?
Should we make vows to the kids as well as each other?
Should our kids even be in the wedding?
Should we invite our exes?
What about gifts? Should we accept gifts the second time around?
What if your [fill in the blank] won't talk to me because she thinks that you never should have divorced your ex?

Pass the antacid because we're talking blended families, same-sex weddings, and COVID-19 wrapped in one big bundle of irreverent humor on this week's episode of I Shouldn't Have Had Kids.
Links
Ellen's spirit animal of the week: Malcolm Gladwell's Revisionist History Podcast
YouTube video that will make you go "Awww":The Vice Principal's Big Surprise
Follow us on social media!
Instagram @ishouldnthavehadkids
Facebook ishouldnthavehadkids
Twitter @SHHKids
Have a funny story to share about parenting (or being parented)? Email us and we'll read it on the show!
ishouldnthavehadkids@gmail.com
Find all episodes of I Shouldn't Have Had Kids wherever you get your podcasts
Buzzsprout
Apple Podcasts
Spotify

Food Fight – 20 Apr 13, 2020

Show notes

Quarantined at home with COVID-19 means every parent is now the host of their own cooking show—and kids are the audience. Talk about a tough crowd.

What do you do when said audience turns their nose up at rice and beans, your signature pandemic dish? Don't they know there are starving kids in India, Africa and downtown L.A.?

Kids were making parents crazy in the perpetual family food fight long before the novel coronavirus turned our lives and the dinner table upside down. Let's face it, though. It's a special slice of hell when we're all stuck together inside and someone just ate the last slice of pizza. Oh, snap.

Join us as we detail power struggles with hungry toddlers, new parents who hand wring over baby's every bite, and finicky middle school eaters in this week's episode of I Shouldn't Have Had Kids. And don't forget to pack a lunch.
Must-see Video
YouTube:Denver the Guilty Dog
Find all episodes of I Shouldn't Have Had Kids wherever you get your podcasts
Buzzsprout
Apple Podcasts
Spotify
Follow us on social media!
Instagram @ishouldnthavehadkids
Facebook ishouldnthavehadkids
Twitter @SHHKids
Or, email us :)
ishouldnthavehadkids@gmail.com

Summer Fever – 19 Apr 06, 2020

Show notes

Remember when spring meant a million end-of-the-year school events, figuring out who would watch the kids for the summer, and a frantic dash to get their summer activities selected, booked, and organized? We used to complain about the headache of it all but now we'd give our right arms—both of 'em—to be facing the summer schedule gauntlet again.
Instead, the Washington state lockdown continues. This week, Washington's governor announced that public schools will remain closed for the rest of the year (cue Alice Cooper's "School's Out for Summer"). And parents everywhere are muttering to themselves, "I shouldn't have had kids..."
Who knows where we'll be come June, but while we wait and wonder, stay right here with us. We'll keep you company with ridiculous stories of our parenting, eye-rolling antics of older kids adulting, and Shy Guy's search for any kind of normality as he comes of age alongside Covid–19.
All we can say is, what the actual fuck?

Coping with Covid – 18 Mar 30, 2020

Show notes

They say laughter is the best medicine. Well, we call BS. A vaccine against this damn virus is truly the best medicine. Until it arrives, however, we'll have to make do with a little laughter and a lot of alcohol. And Doritos. There must be Doritos.
This week, a look at how this pandemic has turned the world upside down—especially for parents. If you've never tried working from home with a three-year-old hanging off your chair, count your blessings. Or how about a hungry teenager busting into your home office (AKA your bedroom) while you're in the middle of an important virtual meeting. You silently mouth, "I'm on the phone," but he responds with, "What's for lunch?" at full volume. For the love of god, kid, go open the refrigerator and look! And stay away from my Doritos.
There's never been a better time to podcast for parental sanity. Whatever this thing is that we're doing, let's do it together. It beats the hell out of the alternative. Stay home but stay connected. We'd be lonely without you.
Links
CBS News story: Spring breaker apologizes for “If I get corona, I get corona” comment
A covid-19 pivot: Superfeet offers 3-D printing capacity to help fill medical equipment shortage
YouTube video: Woman interrupted during a BBC interview
Find all episodes of I Shouldn't Have Had Kids wherever you get your podcasts
Buzzsprout
Apple Podcasts
Spotify
Follow us on social media!
Instagram @ishouldnthavehadkids
Facebook ishouldnthavehadkids
Twitter @SHHKids
Or, email us :)
ishouldnthavehadkids@gmail.com

A Covid–19 Quarantine PSA from Lola Mar 27, 2020

Show notes

Our middle son, who's nickname for the podcast is Lola (if you are scratching your head over that one listen to the show trailer), has a word or two for those of you who think that a backyard neighborhood BBQ is good idea in these days of STAY AT HOME.
If you think that every teen and 20-something is out there partying on the beaches of Florida or smoking pot and drinking a Quarantini in the forest with other one-time college students, Lola will restore your faith in this generation of kids.

Raising Boys vs Raising Girls – 17 Mar 23, 2020

Show notes

While the world spins out of control, we hunker down in the Bombcast Studio to compare notes on the differences between raising boys and raising girls. And don't you even suggest that there's no difference between the two!
Could we have spent an hour talking about Covid-19, lamenting the demise of the human race, and wondering what in the hell went wrong at the highest levels? Why, yes. We could have, but what's the fun in that? The ONLY way any of us are going to get through this god-awful situation is to love hard, laugh often and stay six feet apart. We can help you with that laughter bit.
A big shout out to the Boymom Squad Facebook Group who absolutely rocked this topic with their stories. Love knowing that we are in good company raising Tigger, Lola and Shy Guy!

Links
One mom shares her 5-year-old's favorite Spotify choice: The Fart Song
Uncle Bonzai's ode to the penis on Spotify: If I Had A Penis
Follow us on social media!
Instagram @ishouldnthavehadkids
Facebook ishouldnthavehadkids
Twitter @SHHKids
Have a funny story to share about parenting (or being parented)? Email us and we'll read it on the show!
ishouldnthavehadkids@gmail.com
Find all episodes of I Shouldn't Have Had Kids wherever you get your podcasts
Buzzsprout
Apple Podcasts
Spotify

Sharenting – 16 Mar 16, 2020

Show notes

Sharenting
Covid-19 has turned the world on its ear! Schools are closed. The world is working remotely. And Lola is home from college until the next school year. WTF? So what do parents do? We jump online to post "home school" schedules, photos of our kids being adorable, and everything in between. In other words, we sharent.
Sharenting is that thing where parents share waaaaaay too much about their kids on social media to the point where their kids—and their friends—roll their eyes in exasperation. Join us this week as we sharent all over the place on I Shouldn't Have Had Kids.
Laughter might not cure the coronavirus, but it's good medicine—and we’ve still got a good supply on the shelf!
Quote of the Week
“You know you’ve failed as a parent when you’re getting lessons in online responsibility from a god damn teenager. These are the same people who would French kiss a taser for TikTok.” ~Lewis Black
Links
Hilarious Girl Scout Parody on YouTube: All About That Badge
New York Times Article about Harvard Closing: An Eviction Notice
Back In Black on the Daily Show: The Rise of "Sharenting"
New York Times Video: Why Kids Are Confronting Their Parents About "Sharenting"
University of Michigan's National Poll on Children's Health: The Likes and Dislikes of Sharenting
The Atlantic Video: Are Parents Exploiting Their Kids on Social Media?

Follow us on social media!
Instagram @ishouldnthavehadkids
Facebook ishouldnthavehadkids
Twitter @SHHKids
Have a funny story to share? Email us and we'll read it on the show!
ishouldnthavehadkids@gmail.com
Find all episodes of I Shouldn't Have Had Kids wherever you get your podcasts
Buzzsprout
Apple Podcasts
Spotify

Quarantined with Kids – 15 Mar 09, 2020

Show notes

Covid-19 is turning our lives upside down and inside out. There's a weirdo run on toilet paper, schools are taking classrooms online, and many parents here in the Pacific Northwest are quarantined with kids. Sounds hilarious, right?
To be honest, when you are podcasting from the epicenter of the coronavirus outbreak, there's not much you can do besides laugh. And wash your hands. Again. And again. And again.
This week, what to do with the kids when school is closed for whatever reason—a holiday, a snow day, or a pandemic. Pass the hand sanitizer, please.
Links
Hilarious parenting website: Filter Free Parents
Learn how to speak teen: What's a VSCO Girl? And Other Translations From Your Teen's Secret Language
Stand by your man: Badass Dr. Jill Biden
Follow us on social media!
Instagram @ishouldnthavehadkids
Facebook ishouldnthavehadkids
Twitter @SHHKids
Have a funny story to share about parenting (or being parented)? Email us and we'll read it on the show!
ishouldnthavehadkids@gmail.com
Find all episodes of I Shouldn't Have Had Kids wherever you get your podcasts
Buzzsprout
Apple Podcasts
Spotify

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