Heaving Bosoms

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Samantha D, you are Lampetia, an ancient Greek goddess who was the daughter of Helios and Neaera. You are the physical personification of light and positivity. You have a special soft spot for animals, and you were put in charge of guarding livestock. When Odysseus did some bullshit to your animals that we won't talk about, you threatened to take all the light to the underworld. And you know what? He didn't pull that shit again. But, hey girl, just between us, we've read some stuff about Hades, and taking a trip to the underworld might not be a bad idea just generally.

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Ep. 181 - The Roommate by Rosie Danan (PART 2) Mar 22, 2021

Show notes

Hey y'all! We're back with the conclusion to The Roommate by Rosie Danan! Their pleasure education website, shameless, is in production and these two crazy kids won't realize they're mutually pining. And the reader is mutually pining as a result! It's a swoon.

Bonus Content:

Erin is SO TIRED, Rooster burrowing in snow, Mel LOVES flip cup, Wet humping, Penguin Hygiene Facts, The Gals have a full-on fight over warm summer nights, Erin out-soapboxes Mel, falling in love over drawing on the table at restaurants, and so much more!

Lady Loves:

Melody: Strength training so you don't randomly injure yourself!

Erin: Hey, if you gained some Pandemic Pounds, buy yourself some new clothes so you don't feel terrible. Just buy the clothes.

PARTNERSHIP:

Go to www.readromancerepeat.com and sign up for the April box with the code HEAVING. You'll get a one-of-a-kind Heaving Bosoms keychain! If you're already a subscriber and want a keychain included in your April box at no extra charge, email hello@therippedbodicela.com and let them know! You must order by April 1st to get in on this!!!

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Ep. 180 - The Roommate by Rosie Danan (PART 1) Mar 15, 2021

Show notes

Hey HBs! We're here with part 1 of THE ROOMMATE by Rosie Danan! We each read this book over hiatus and LOVED IT, so we decided to cover it for y'all! We've got Clara, an East Coast blue blood who is completely scandal-averse, showing up in LA to finally woo her life-long crush. Great plan! Except that he's going on tour with his band (whoops!) and he's found her a roommate on craigslist. The roommate Josh turns out to be a mainstream porn star, utter dreamboat, and the man of her destiny! Y'all. This book. Heart eyes don't begin to cover it.

Bonus Content:

Erin’s bad decisions for celebrity friends regarding Crash Landing On You, tour van smells, goose sperms, we are on the record saying we’re NOT inviting dirty letters (!!), whimpers, sleepy boys, black hats/lists/balls/lists on hats?, calling sex "balling" *hork!*, being overly competitive, and so much more!

Lady loves:

Erin: In this time of great upheaval as we enter the vaccine stage of the pandemic, apply the rehab theory “do the next right thing.” It’s going to be harder, but it will work out better in the end.

Melody: *sobs* be kind to yourself. If you’re doing the best you can, and you do the next right thing, that’s all you can do, and that’s ok.

PARTNERSHIP:

Mentioned in this episode:

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You support us, plus you get access to 150+ bonus episodes, video of regular episodes, gifts, care packages, author hangs, votes in show content, and SO MUCH MORE!!!

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Hey y'all! We've got some high quality St. Vincent themed items just waiting for you!

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Ep. 179 - Crash Landing On You (Ep 1) with Lo and Kate Clayborn! Mar 08, 2021

Show notes

Whoooaaaa! Lo of Christina Lauren and Kate Clayborn stopped by to introduce us to our brand new obsession, Crash Landing On You! This K-drama has already bewitched our minds and stolen our souls. Come with us as we recap episode one! We’ll be recapping the rest of the episode, one by one, on our Patreon!

Plus, we chat all about Kate’s new release LOVE AT FIRST. Mel loved it!

Bonus Content: Is this a retelling of Wizard of Oz? There was that time we didn’t realize Icecapade was a Christmas Carol retelling, husbands hear everything, especially when you’re stealing their m&ms, Erin’s new theory that tornadoes can use shovels and bury mines, the appeal of TALL men for Kate, helmets are such a buzzkill, and so much more!

Self Love Recommendations Erin: cauldron mugs from etsy! Kate: my houseplants! Lo: get your friends book birthday flowers, but accidentally send them to yourself! Melody: get your friends surprise gifts without telling them!

Follow Kate @kateclayborn and Christina Lauren @ChristinaLauren!

Episode Sponsors:

TALK DIRTY TO ME by Imogen Keeper. It’s a romantic suspense with a hitman (grumpy) and a writer (sunshine) that is HOT HOT HOT and keeps you on the edge of your seat!

The podcast COMA GIRL by Stephanie Bond. In this daily podcast, the victim of a tragic event lies in a hospital bed, at the mercy of friends and relatives who think she can't hear them. But she SO can. Get it anywhere you listen to podcasts!

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Patreon Shout Out:

Kendall HO, you are a Chalkydri, an ancient Greek angel who is mesmerizing to behold that you cannot look directly at it because you will be so enchanted and go insane. You are said to be all the colors of the rainbow, have the head of an alligator, and the feet and tails of a lion. You live near the Sun and announce the new day to all the other birds and flying creatures each day. Isn't that nice? Like a beautiful, gentle alarm clock of light and love. Thank you for all that you do.

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July 2022 Bonkers Book Club!

Join the Temple of Defiant Joy! July 2022 is offering you: the box set of Nicola Davidson's Surrey SFS series, Brutal Prince by Sophie Lark, and AUDIOBOOK Obsession by K. Lorrainne and Meg Anne, duet narration performed by Stella Hunter, Shane East, Aaron Shedlock, JF Harding, Jason Clarke, and James Joseph.

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Ep. 178 - Sylvie's Love with Dani! Mar 01, 2021

Show notes

Hey Listener! This week Melody is joined by Dani from Black Chick Lit and Ice Planet Podcasts to recap the film Sylvie's Love. It stars Tessa Thompson and Nnamdi Asomughda and is supported by Regé-Jean Page (from Bridgerton!), Aja Naomi King, and Eva Longoria! It is such a beautiful and cozy watch and it was everything we needed!

Bonus Content: New year, new president, holy vintage fashion, Batman, The Duke of Hastings is in this!, but Mel knew him from his lesser-known role as an ambitious prosecutor in We The People (weird flex), what is a French Light?, how say "saxophonist"?!, husband Lacey was Cato from the show Underground, silly champagne/fish sounds, ALIEN SEX BOOKS, and so much more!

Self-Love Recommendations (Lady Loves):

Dani: Playing Stardew Valley and creating Ice Planet Pod

Mel: an amazing musical podcast called In Strange Woods. It's like the best investigative podcast meets Broadway and she's obsessed.

Find Dani on Black Chick Lit and Ice Planet Pod. And the urban fic episode she references is here and fabulous. And Twitter: @blackchicklit, @iceplanetpod, and @Dani_Lacey

Episode Sponsor: Kensie's Treasures by JM Schneider. It's a romantic suspense novel set around a high-stakes treasure hunt! He also created playlists for the characters here.

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You support us, plus you get access to 150+ bonus episodes, video of regular episodes, gifts, care packages, author hangs, votes in show content, and SO MUCH MORE!!!

July 2022 Bonkers Book Club!

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Devil In Winter by Lisa Kleypas (PART 3) | Ep. 177 Feb 22, 2021

Show notes

Hey HBs, it's the fabulous conclusion to Devil In Winter by Lisa Kleypas! St. Vincent is a big hero and Evie is the perfect sickbed caretaker (shocking with her views on germs, I know!). And it was St. Vincent in the Billiards Room with the Cunnilingus!

Lady Loves:

Mel: Weighted scarf for anxiety care on the move

Erin: Stickers! Get 'em, stick 'em, they will brighten your day!

Episode Sponsor:

LOVEBUG by Erin Mallon. It's a romcom standalone with a sweet entomologist heroine and a gruff hero! You can hear an excerpt of the audio book at the end of the episode!

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GET LIMITED MERCH of "Stay Golden, Horny Girl!" until Feb 23, 2021. All proceeds benefit The National Coalition Against Domestic Violence.

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You support us, plus you get access to 150+ bonus episodes, video of regular episodes, gifts, care packages, author hangs, votes in show content, and SO MUCH MORE!!!

July 2022 Bonkers Book Club!

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Devil in Winter by Lisa Kleypas (PART 2) | Ep. 176 Feb 15, 2021

Show notes

Hey HBs! It's The Lord St. Vincent PART 2! In which the marriage is CONSUMATED, they finish their roadtrip, Evie is in big danger, and the couple strikes a bargain: 3 months of celibacy for lifelong sexytimes and fidelity. Woo!

Bonus Content: Erin is "a reader" on Fated Mates because her twitter bio didn't include Heaving Bosoms, we plan St. Vincent Day (4/2!), we can't say the word dick, Mel's plan to seduce St. Vincent as the Michelin Man, the batman, Evie is an anti-masker, Melody is a Horse Girl, the gals give real good advice about space travel, and so much more!

Lady Loves: Melody: Don't fall for facebook ads about facial suckers that will give you hickeys! Face hickeys!

Erin: Coconut shrimp, no!, Chicken Fritta at the Olive Garden! Fried chicken on noodles!

Episode Sponsor: Warmer In the Winter, a new role playing game where you and your friends ARE IN A HALLMARK MOVIE. Go support the Kickstarter!

Follow @HEAapologist on twitter for more sick burns and romance enthusiasm!

Subscribe! Rate! Review! Tell all your friends :)

Get more content on PATREON

GET LIMITED MERCH of "Stay Golden, Horny Girl!" All proceeds benefit The National Coalition Against Domestic Violence.

And follow our socials:

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Twitter: @heaving_bosoms

Mentioned in this episode:

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Want more HB? Check out our PATREON!

You support us, plus you get access to 150+ bonus episodes, video of regular episodes, gifts, care packages, author hangs, votes in show content, and SO MUCH MORE!!!

July 2022 Bonkers Book Club!

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Devil In Winter by Lisa Kleypas (PART 1) | Ep. 175 Feb 08, 2021

Show notes

We're back from hiatus with the best book everrrr, Devil In Winter by Lisa Kleypas. We have been introduced to our favorite hero in the whole universe, Sebastian The Lord St. Vincent! This is part one, so buckle up for a wallflower, a marriage of convenience, and a first kiss! In the rain!

Bonus Content: Hiatus was so restful! (not), we would die and betray each other for St. Vincent, we're horrible, hypocritical St. Vincent apologists, what happens to the horses that you rent from inns?, Jack London's lasting legacy of traumatizing high schoolers, Erin realizes the plot of Pride and Prejudice via currency conversion, RAIN KISSES!, and so much more!

Lady Loves:

Erin: Chicken Nuggets. Seriously, they're for adults, too.

Melody: she reread Audre Lorde's A Burst of Light and Other Essays and she was struck once again by her self care quote: "Caring for myself is not self-indulgence, it is self-preservation, and that is an act of political warfare.” Remember that about reading romance!

Over Hiatus:

Melody talked about Beach Read (and cults) on Make Out Already Pod

Erin and Mel joined Sarah and Amanda on Smart Podcast Trashy Books to recap Toxic Desire by Robin Lovett!

GET LIMITED MERCH inspired by that episode! All proceeds benefit The National Coalition Against Domestic Violence.

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And follow our socials:

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Twitter: @heaving_bosoms

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You support us, plus you get access to 150+ bonus episodes, video of regular episodes, gifts, care packages, author hangs, votes in show content, and SO MUCH MORE!!!

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Hey y'all! We've got some high quality St. Vincent themed items just waiting for you!

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Ep. 174 - The Duchess Deal by Tessa Dare (Rerelease) Feb 01, 2021

Show notes

Hey HBs! On this last week of hiatus, we're bringing you Tessa Dare's The Duchess Deal! This episode was the birth of recurring bits like Queen Bird, Darkwing Duke, Werecunt, and more. It was originally aired in 2 episodes, but you're getting the full experience in one shot! We've got a strong, survivor seamstress, a Duke marred by burn wounds, and a marriage of convenience turned redemptive love. This is Melody's favorite heroine and Erin's favorite hero from the brain of Tessa Dare. There's also a colorful cast of side characters including a street cat named Breeches. There's badminton, rain, a jailbreak, cursing in Shakespeare, and HOT HOT SEX.

Bonus content: the Alaskan phenomenon that is the drive up bikini coffee bar, burping on cue in the name of motherhood, Erin's thoroughly-researched grasp on historical time periods, and our vast knowledge of fireplaces. Does Melody know what animals are? Or sounds? And seriously, what does "make ready" mean in England times???

Alright, darlings, WERECUNTS UNITE!

Self love recommendations:

Erin: "You have to give up being perfect to be good, and give up being good to be free." Let that wash over you.

Melody: When Things Fall Apart: Heart Advice for Difficult Times by Pema Chodron

Mentioned in this episode:

Love the show? Leave a review!

Check out our Etsy Store!

Hey y'all! We've got some high quality St. Vincent themed items just waiting for you!

Want more HB? Check out our PATREON!

You support us, plus you get access to 150+ bonus episodes, video of regular episodes, gifts, care packages, author hangs, votes in show content, and SO MUCH MORE!!!

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Ep. 173 - The Red by Tiffany Reisz (RERELEASE) Jan 25, 2021

Show notes

Hey HBs, happy third week of hiatus! We're bringing one of our faves in the back catalogue. THE RED by Tiffany Reisz! It's an erotic fantasy novel about a fiery gallery owner who's in debt and on the brink of losing everything and the mysterious man who wants to help her save it... for a price. He's not interested in her soul, though, he wants her BODY. Yum!

Bonus Content: Ember's newest skill, Erin's trip to IL, wedding dress shopping, a discussion on using the term "whore" in the most empowering and delicious way, reclaiming the word cunt, and the segments *Bing Boong Bong* "safe sex work with Melody," "do your fucking job with Melody," "sex with mythical creatures with Erin," Melody's favorite alternate universe, and Erin's feelings on masquerade masks. Plus, MINOTAUR DONG. And does our podcast have a low-key new theme?

Strap in and maybe strap on. You're gonna need all your resources for this one.

Lady Loves:

Melody: Email or tween an author to tell them how much you love their work. Sometimes making other people feel great and know their worth is such a lovely pick-me-up.

Erin: To All the Boys I've Loved Before and Love Simon. Sunshine, rainbows, and feel good films! Get them in your brain!

Check out our recent guest spots on Smart Podcast Trashy Books and Make Out Already Pod!

Subscribe! Rate! Review!

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And follow our socials:

Instagram: @heavingbosoms

Twitter: @heaving_bosoms

Mentioned in this episode:

Check out our Etsy Store!

Hey y'all! We've got some high quality St. Vincent themed items just waiting for you!

Want more HB? Check out our PATREON!

You support us, plus you get access to 150+ bonus episodes, video of regular episodes, gifts, care packages, author hangs, votes in show content, and SO MUCH MORE!!!