Girlfriends (A Podcast for Catholic Women)

Latest Episodes:

How to Make Good Habits Stick May 14, 2019

Show notes

This week I am answering a question from listener Erin who wants to know how to get herself to do the things she wants to do. We all struggle with making good habits. We have values and priorities, but sometimes when it comes to following through, we need what Erin calls a “kick in the pants.” Snippet from the Show “God wants us to set reasonable goals out of self-love, not self-loathing.” SHOWNOTES There are some things that can help us find success in establishing the good habits we want and stopping the bad habits we don’t want. This week I am sharing four ideas: Identify your pitfalls. Think about what might make you fail before your failure happens. What obstacles might get in the way? What temptations might you fall prey to? Make a plan now for how you will handle your pitfalls or avoid them altogether. Make laziness work for you. We are all creatures of efficiency and so we can really increase our chances of success if we make good choices easy to do and bad choices hard to do. Make the things you want to do super convenient, even in small ways, and you will be much more likely to do them. Hold yourself accountable. You might share your goals with a friend, with your spouse, or on social media. Write down your goals and check in with yourself and others to see how you are doing. Accountability can go a long way toward helping us make the good choices we want to make. Set goals that are S.M.A.R.T. Your goals should be specific, measurable, achievable, realistic, and time-based. Each of these is a key ingredient to defining new habits you will want to stick with!
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Meet the Man Behind Girlfriends May 07, 2019

Show notes

This is the show you’ve been waiting for! This week, my husband Dan joins me on the show for an original interview—the first male guest we’ve ever had on Girlfriends. Dan takes readers’ questions from Instagram, discussing pregnant women, complementarity between the sexes, and even foul language. And then Dan tackles the same topic we discussed last week from my point of view—discipline. Dan shares some of his ideas about the importance of setting and enforcing rules as parents, but also talks about establishing a “family culture” that will form your kids and serve them well, even when they leave home. For the full shownotes, including a list of my upocoming events, check out this episode at ascensionpress.com/girlfriends
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Principles for Effective Discipline Apr 30, 2019

Show notes

In anticipation of next week’s show, when my husband Dan will be coming on to share about discipline, I thought this week I would share my own perspective on effective discipline. At the beginning of this episode, I mention a new video series on Divine Mercy from Fr. Chris Alar!! If you don't know much about Divine Mercy, or you want to learn more, check out this free video series at ascensionpress.com/pages/divinemercyvideos (https://ascensionpress.com/pages/divinemercyvideos) I also share feedback from listener Megan who listened to the first forty episodes of Girlfriends through all of Lent. Thank you, Megan! :) Snippet from the Show “What a privilege and honor that our children’s first experience of who God is is through their relationship with us [their parents].” Here are four ideas I have to share – let’s see how Dan’s list compares next week when he comes on! Be clear. Set standards for your kids and expect them to meet them. Follow through. If you set a standard and a child fails to meet that standard, there must be consequences. It’s not personal. Kids are young and immature, and they are figuring out the world. They are going to choose wrongly sometimes, and if we react emotionally, it’s not helpful to any of us. It actually is personal. Invest in healthy, loving relationships with your kids, and discipline will become less necessary, and more effective when you use it. For more detailed shownotes, check out this episode at ascensionpress.com/girlfriends
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Easy Ways to Practice Mercy this Easter Apr 23, 2019

Show notes

Do you know that next Sunday we will observe Divine Mercy Sunday? This time of year is a wonderful opportunity to focus on Jesus’ gift of Divine Mercy. I mention Fr. Chris Alan in today’s episode, and I just found out that he has created a video series on Divine Mercy with Ascension! Go to ascensionpress.com/pages/divinemercyvideos (https://ascensionpress.com/pages/divinemercyvideos) to sign up to receive exclusive access to this FREE video series! A great way to celebrate Easter for all fifty days is to plan to practice the Corporal Works of Mercy in your family and in your community. In this week’s show, I share ideas for creative ways to practice each of the works of mercy. Feed the Hungry Give Drink to the Thirsty Clothe the Naked Shelter the Homeless Visit the Sick Visit the Imprisoned Bury the Dead How do you plan to practice mercy in the coming weeks? I would love to hear your ideas! I also share feedback from listeners Christian and Melissa. Melissa shares how much she loves using the Hallow app for meditative prayer. Check it out for yourself! Snippet from the Show “Anybody can do this. In our imperfect ways we can practice this devotion [Divine Mercy] to Jesus.”
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Rock & Roll Meets the Faith (with Dawn Eden Goldstein) Apr 16, 2019

Show notes

This week, I had the opportunity to chat with author Dawn Eden Goldstein about her newest book, Sunday Will Never Be the Same: A Rock & Roll Journalist Opens Her Ears to God. Dawn shares about her conversion from the Jewish faith to Christianity and eventually the Catholic Faith through the telling of the fascinating story of her life. The book is beautifully written and inspiring to readers and seekers from all walks of life. Check out the shownotes for this episode at ascensionpress.com/girlfriends
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Spiritual Benefits of Fasting Apr 09, 2019

Show notes

Holy cow, you guys! I heard from so many of you after my recent show (5 Ways to Grow in Patience) and you were all about the fasting. I mentioned in that show that I believe fasting is a helpful way to work on becoming more patient, and many of you wanted to know more. To begin, I share voice feedback from listener Andrea who wanted to know some practical tips for making fasting more successful. I share some ideas along those lines at the start of the show: Stay busy Drink plenty of water Start small And then we move on to some ideas I want to share about what I believe are the main spiritual benefits of fasting: Fasting quiets your inner “self.” This is the main thing we are called to do as Christians—deny ourselves and focus on God and others. Fasting teaches us to not seek immediate gratification. You are not going to die because you feel hungry. Through fasting, you gain power over physical desires. We are meant to control our physical passions with the use of our reason, and fasting is a practice in exactly that. If you can master your hunger, you can master your anger, lust, pride, and so on. Fasting helps you grow in gratitude. It’s hard to be grateful for food when we are constantly eating it and never truly experience hunger. We don’t even really enjoy food when we are eating very frequently. Fasting teaches us to appreciate food, but also many other blessings and pleasures in our lives. When you fast, you can “offer it up.” When Jesus went into the desert to pray, he fasted too. Prayer and fasting go hand in hand. You can offer up your fasting for yourself, for your marriage, for a friend, for the Church, or for some special intention. It’s powerful! Through fasting, we gain strength to do hard things. The practice of fasting teaches us to accept suffering that comes our way and be patient in it, because we know it will not last forever. It’s a discipline that teaches us to trust in God for our strength. Fasting empties you and prepares you to receive God. When we empty ourselves out physically, we become prepared to receive God’s grace, strength, love, and presence. Physical hunger is a physical manifestation of a spiritual hunger and longing for God. fasting helps us to see this and practice being receptive to God in our “emptiness.” Are you fasting? Let me know how it’s going!
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This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit daniellebean.substack.com/subscribe

12 Ways to Boost Your Energy Apr 02, 2019

Show notes

We all have times in our lives and in our days where we feel worn out and sluggish, but today we will combat these feelings and boost our energy in simple ways! We talk a lot about things we should spend our time and energy on, things like: hospitality, prayer, exercise, and volunteering. These are all amazing things that we should strive for, but so often our energy is put into the things we have to do, that we have so little left for the things we want to do. We often think of the body/mind connection in terms of what the mind can do. The phrase “mind over matter” implies that we can accomplish anything, so long as we have a will of iron. But the body is important here too. Let’s talk about some of the things we can do to get our body on board with our mind and boost our energy. Some of these things require a bit of will power at the beginning, but once you’ve started, your body will respond as well! I also share feedback about hospitality from listener Elizabeth and some fasting support from listener Dawn who shares this link to a helpful article on the topic. Please, let’s remember to pray for Dawn as she completes the process of entering the Church this Easter! Snippet from the Show There are Catholic forms of meditation, like praying the Rosary and lectio divina. Relaxing your mind and letting go in that way gives you a boost in energy. Your body needs that kind of rest. To see my resources and contact information check out the shownotes for each episode at ascensionpress.com/girlfriends
Get full access to Girlfriends After Hours at daniellebean.substack.com/subscribe
To hear more, visit daniellebea.substack.com
This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit daniellebean.substack.com/subscribe

5 Ways to Be More Patient Mar 26, 2019

Show notes

Patience is something we can all afford to work on. Not just because patience is a virtue and so we should avoid impatience, but because we can negatively affect relationships with others and our own happiness when we are impatient. This week, we also hear feedback from listener Aubrey who appreciated our recent show about talking to your kids about tough moral topics. Thank you, Aubrey! Is patience a struggle for you? Join the club! Here are five ways I suggest that can help you become more patient. Find out the cause. Figure out what your triggers are and then work on changing your approach to those people and those situations that lead you to impatience. Are you stressed? Are you multitasking? Are you running late? Are you tired? Figure out the cause of your impatience so you can work on addressing the problem at its cause. Try fasting. Fasting is a spiritual practice that can help you to grow in patience. I have been experimenting with spiritual fasting this Lent and have been surprised to find that it truly helps me to be more calm and patient even in frustrating situations. Fasting helps to quiet your focus on yourself and constant seeking of immediate gratification. Pray. Do you ever pray for the virtue of patience? Try praying before your day even starts, asking for help in those situations that you know will try your patience. Also, you can pray for those people who make you impatient. This can help change your focus away from yourself and toward others’ perspectives. Breathe. We’ve talked about the importance of remembering to breathe when we discussed stress on the show before. When you get stressed, you naturally begin to breathe more shallow breaths, which can increase your feelings of stress. Pause to breathe when you start to feel impatient. It’s a great way to hit your inner “pause” button, remember to pray, and assess the situation fairly. Use the word “YET” This is a fun little trick to help you remember to be more positive and less frustrated in your everyday thoughts. When you think of something negative, try adding the word “yet” at the end of your thought: “Jamie hasn’t taken out the garbage … yet.” “I don’t understand this math problem … yet.” Adding yet switches your focus from negative assumptions to positive and optimistic thoughts. Try it!
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This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit daniellebean.substack.com/subscribe

The Girlfriend’s Guide to Hospitality Mar 19, 2019

Show notes

Let’s talk about having people over! Why does hospitality feel so hard sometimes? The idea of having people over is so nice. Chatting in my clean living room, having beautifully prepared hors d’ourves, not running ahead of someone to make sure the bathroom is presentable ... But that’s not reality. We don’t need to have perfect homes and lives to invite someone in. So just do it! Here are some tips I want to share with regard to hospitality: 1. Stop putting it off. Be honest about the kinds of excuses you might be making and just invite someone over already! I have a challenge for you: invite someone over before the end of Lent this year. 2. It’s not about your house. Reflect on the differences between the idea of “entertaining” versus “hospitality.” If you are worried about your house instead of about welcoming people, you might be focused on the wrong things. 3. Keep it simple. No one says you have to throw a fancy dinner party. Just invite friends over for dessert, or another mom over for coffee. Make sure it’s not overwhelming and you will more likely to do it again. 4. Do not make your family insane. Hospitality is more likely to be a pleasant experience for all of you if you calm yourself down beforehand. You are not allowed to make your family insane while preparing for company. Again, if you do this, maybe you aren’t focused on the right things? (Here is the funny video I mentioned) 5. Prepare for conversations. Spend a little time before your guests arrive thinking about who will be there and what kinds of things you can ask them about. What is going on in their lives? What might you ask them about? A little thought goes a long way toward making people feel comfortable and creating meaningful connections with others. Have feedback or an idea to share? I would love to hear from you!
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This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit daniellebean.substack.com/subscribe

Helping the Church in Need (with Brooke Taylor) Mar 12, 2019

Show notes

Today we’re talking about how we can help the global Church through prayer and offerings, and the ministry of The Church in Need, a papal charity that supports the Catholic faithful and other Christians where they are persecuted, oppressed, or in pastoral need. My guest this week is Brooke Taylor, an author, runner, mama, wife, and a friend of mine. Brooke shares about her upcoming half marathon she will be running in the Holy Land, in order to raise funds and awareness for The Church in Need. We’re almost a week into Lent! How is it going for you so far? Let me know in the comments! Check out these previous Lent-themed Girlfriends episodes: Pray Fast Give and Girlfriend’s Guide to Fasting I also share feedback from listener Tereza who asks about how to handle a tricky situation with her mother-in-law. Snippet from the Show “Sometimes you see the news and feel helpless in the face of evil. But there is something you can actually do.” RESOURCES FROM THE SHOW Brooke’s website: http://brooketaylor.us/ Support Brooke’s run: churchinneed.org/jerusalem-marathon/ Church in Need: churchinneed.org The Litany of Trust: sistersoflife.org/litany-of-trust
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To hear more, visit daniellebea.substack.com
This is a public episode. If you'd like to discuss this with other subscribers or get access to bonus episodes, visit daniellebean.substack.com/subscribe

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