Full-Tilt Parenting: Strategies, Insights, and Connection for Parents Raising Neurodivergent Children

Latest Episodes:

TPP 417: A Conversation with Dr. Gina Riley on Self-Determination Theory & Motivation Dec 10, 2024

Show notes

We’ve touched on the theory of self-determination on the show before, but today, I’m thrilled to dedicate an entire episode to this important topic. Joining me for this deeper dive is Dr. Gina Riley, an expert in self-determination theory and motivation. This conversation will resonate with so many of you because it beautifully ties into themes we often explore here, like low-demand parenting and fostering our kids’ natural passions and strengths.

In this episode, Gina explains the theory of self-determination and dives into the science behind why it’s so impactful, particularly for neurodivergent kids. We explore how it connects with autonomy-supportive parenting and discuss the three tenets of cognitive evaluation theory, which examines what fosters intrinsic motivation. We also tackle the hot topic of whether extrinsic motivators like stickers and rewards have a place and how to genuinely connect with our kids' interests—even when they differ from our own.

About Dr. Gina Riley

Gina Riley, Ph.D., is an educational psychologist, Program Director, and Clinical Professor of Adolescent Special Education at CUNY – Hunter College. She has conducted significant research on homeschooling and unschooling, an educational method and philosophy that advocates student intrinsic motivation as a primary means for learning. In addition to her research on self-directed learning environments, Dr. Riley has expertise in Supported Decision Making, an alternative to guardianship for students with disabilities. She is a faculty advisor for Supported Decision Making New York, promoting autonomy and self-determination for individuals with disabilities.

Dr.Riley also has extensive experience in online, hybrid, and HyFlex education, having been actively involved in the field since 1998. Her contributions to educational psychology and alternative education models have been influential in shaping contemporary discussions on personalized and flexible learning approaches. Dr. Riley is the author of numerous academic articles and three books, including Unschooling:Exploring Learning Beyond the Classroom (Palgrave, 2020), The Homeschooling Starter Guide (Simon & Schuster, 2021), and The Joys of Self Determined Learning: A Collection of Essays (Ricci Publishing, 2022). She is the current President-Elect of the New York State Association of Teacher Educators.

Things you'll learn from this episode

What self-determination theory is, and how it’s connected to intrinsic motivation
Why a sense of competence, autonomy, and relatedness, as outlined in the cognitive evaluation theory, are crucial for motivation
Why it matters that parents focus on facilitating autonomy and decision-making in their children
What the science says about how and why intrinsic motivation leads to better academic and social outcomes in adulthood
How intrinsic and extrinsic motivations can coexist and why it’s important that they’re balanced

Resources mentioned

Dr. Gina Riley’s website
Gina on Instagram
Gina on Twitter
Unschooling: Exploring Learning Beyond the Classroom by Dr. Gina Riley
The Homeschooling Starter Guide: How to Create and Adapt the Best Education Action Plan for Your Needs by Dr. Gina Riley
NYS Decision Making Curriculum (free decision making curriculum for schools and homeschools
I Will Die on This Hill: Autistic Adults, Autism Parents, and the Children Who Deserve a Better World by Meghan Ashburn and Jules Edwards
Meghan Ashburn and Jules Edwards on Autistic Adults, Autism Parents, and the Children Who Deserve a Better World (Tilt Parenting podcast)
Drive: The Surprising Truth About What Motivates Us by Dan Pink
The intrinsic motivation of Richard Ryan and Edward Deci
The Self-Driven Child, with William Stixrud and Ned Johnson (Tilt Parenting podcast)
The Self-Driven Child: The Science and Sense of Giving Your Kids More Control Over Their Lives by Dr. William Stixrud and Ned Johnson

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TPP 168a: Speech Pathologist Sherri Cawn Talks About Communication Disorders in Children Dec 06, 2024

Show notes

Sherri Cawn, a leading practitioner of the DIR/Floortime® model in speech and language development, explores characteristics, assessment, intervention of communication disorders in children.

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TPP 416: Dr. Christine Crawford on Parenting Through Mental Health Challenges Dec 03, 2024

Show notes

I know that parenting kids who are struggling with mental health challenges can sometimes feel overwhelming, as though we’re not equipped to handle what’s happening. When our kids are going through tough mental health moments, it can be isolating, scary, and exhausting. That’s why I’m so grateful for the work of my guest today, Dr. Christine Crawford, the associate medical director for the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI), the nation’s largest grassroots mental health organization.

Dr. Crawford is the author of the new book, You Are Not Alone for Parents and Caregivers: The NAMI Guide to Navigating Your Child’s Mental Health—With Advice from Experts and Wisdom from Real Families. It’s an incredibly helpful handbook for any parent navigating this challenging path. The book covers everything from how to talk to our kids about their mental health, to what to do if a long-awaited therapist doesn’t turn out to be the right fit. It also delves into practical and emotional concerns, such as recognizing signs of depression, understanding our critical role as parents in the mental health team, and learning about concepts like the “distress radius” to better gauge the impact of mental health issues.

Finally, a quick content warning: this episode includes discussions of suicidal ideation and other sensitive mental health topics. If these are difficult subjects for you, please prioritize your well-being while listening.

About Dr. Christine Crawford

Christine M. Crawford, MD, MPH is the associate medical director for the National Alliance on Mental Illness (NAMI) which is the country’s largest grassroots mental health organization. She is an Assistant Professor of Psychiatry and Vice Chair of Education at the Boston University School of Medicine. She also provides outpatient psychiatric care to children and adolescents at Boston Medical Center. Additionally, she’s the Medical Director for the Boston Public Health Commission’s School Based Clinician Program in which she provides direct guidance on how best to support the socioemotional wellbeing of children within the Boston Public School System. On behalf of NAMI, she regularly engages with the general public, as well as with organizations, companies, healthcare providers, and fellow clinicians and researchers. She is a trusted source of child mental health expertise for major media outlets including the New York Times, the Washington Post, NPR, the Boston Globe, NBC, and Medscape. She has made on-camera appearances for the Today Show, BBC, and local news affiliates of CBS, Fox, and ABC. She lives with her family in Boston, Massachusetts.

Things you'll learn from this episode

Why it’s important that we talk openly and frequently with our child about their feelings, starting as early as age three
What signs to look for in terms of changes in mood or behavior that might indicate our child is experiencing a mental health challenge
Why parental involvement in mental health care is critical for supporting children’s progress Why learning how to manage and tolerate distressing feelings isn’t just for our struggling kids
What the “distress radius” is and how to use it to identify the extent and impact of mental health issues within our families
How and when to seek community support and other resources when a child is navigating a mental health challenge

Resources mentioned

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TPP 167a: Dr. Rita Eichenstein Offers Help and Hope for Parents of Atypical Children Nov 29, 2024

Show notes

Dr. Rita Eichenstein, author of "Not What I Expected: Help and Hope for Parents of Atypical Children," talks about how parents can process the discovery that their child is neurodivergent.

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TPP 415: How Can I Navigate My Children’s Chaotic Energy at Bedtime? Nov 26, 2024

Show notes

Debbie Reber and parent coach Margaret Webb answer a listener's question about how to deal with chaotic energy among children during the bedtime transition (as well as other big transitions).

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TPP 166a: Dr. Allie Ticktin on the Power of Play in Supporting Differently Wired Kids Nov 22, 2024

Show notes

Dr. Allie Ticktin, a licensed occupational therapist with a specialty in sensory integration and early childhood development, talks about how to tap into the power of play to support a child's learning and development.

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TPP 414: Amanda Jefferson on Digital Decluttering and Organizing Our Tech Lives for More Calm Nov 19, 2024

Show notes

I’ll say right upfront that this is a different kind of episode for the podcast, but stick with me, because today, we’re diving into digital decluttering. I know firsthand the toll digital clutter can take. Raising neurodivergent kids means managing a ton of information — from school communications and teacher emails to scheduling appointments, handling assessments, and organizing documentation. It’s a lot to keep track of, and it can really weigh us down.

If you can relate, this episode is for you. I invited tech and productivity coach Amanda Jefferson, affectionately known as the Tech Whisperer, to help us tackle digital clutter. Amanda guides busy people through streamlining their digital lives and speaks about silencing society’s noisy “shoulds.” She’s a TEDx speaker, one of the world’s first KonMari consultants, and co-host of the Good Enough-ish podcast. Her work has been featured in The Wall Street Journal, Real Simple, Harper’s Bazaar, and Good Day Philadelphia.

In our conversation, we discussed the importance of digital decluttering, particularly for neurodivergent families. Amanda shared strategies for securely storing essential documents, organizing email to reduce stress, managing passwords, and using what she calls “free assistants” on our devices to make daily routines run more smoothly.

Even if you consider yourself tech-savvy, I think you’ll learn something new in this episode. Enjoy, and hopefully, you’ll walk away with some actionable steps!

About Amanda Jefferson

Amanda Jefferson is a tech and productivity coach, TEDx speaker, one of the world’s first KonMari consultants, and host of the top-rated Good Enough-ish podcast. She has been featured in the Wall Street Journal, Real Simple, Harpers Bazaar, Good Day Philadelphia, and more. She was recently named a Top 50 Women Speaker of 2024 by renowned speaker and author Jess Ekstrom. Known affectionately as the Tech Whisperer, Amanda helps busy people declutter their digital lives and talks to audiences about how to quiet the noisy shoulds of society.

Things you'll learn from this episode

How tackling digital clutter bit by bit can lead to noticeable improvements, reducing overwhelm and enhancing focus
Why setting up an “action-needed” folder can streamline email processing, while Gmail's sorting tools and filters help keep the inbox clutter-free
What the “cloud” is and why it’s invaluable for securely storing essential documents and making them accessible anytime
Ideas for streamlining password management
The types of “digital assistants” available to help with reminders, scheduling, and hands-free task management, making family routines smoother
How AI tools like ChatGPT can save time on research and assist with documentation, making digital workflows quicker and more efficient

Resources mentioned

Amanda’s website Indigo Organizing
The Good Enoughish Podcast
Work with Amanda on digital decluttering
Amanda on Instagram
Amanda’s Free Ultimate Checklist for Organizing your Gmail
How to Stay on Top of your Gmail … and Actually Have Fun While Doing It
Skylight Calendar (Tilt listeners get $40 off purchase of a Skylight Calendar when you go to skylightcal.com/tilt)
One Password
Bringing Clarity Into Your Home, Spaces & Life, with Lisa Viscardi (Tilt Parenting podcast)

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TPP 165a: 4 Listeners Share Their Stories of Discovering Their Neurodivergence as Adults Nov 15, 2024

Show notes

Debbie talks with four differently wired adults who share their stories of discovering and/or learn more about their own neurodivergence as a result of parenting their differently wired children.

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TPP 413: Drs. Brock & Fernette Eide on the Unique Advantages of the Dyslexic Brain Nov 12, 2024

Show notes

I’m thrilled to finally welcome Drs. Brock and Fernette Eide to the show! They’re the authors of the groundbreaking, recently updated book The Dyslexic Advantage: Unlocking the Hidden Potential of the Dyslexic Brain. As leading experts in dyslexia, Brock and Fernette have reshaped our understanding of dyslexia through a strengths-based lens. They continue this work through their nonprofit, Dyslexic Advantage, and their social purpose company, Neurolearning. Rather than viewing dyslexia as a disorder, they advocate for understanding it as a unique learning and processing style. In today’s conversation, you’ll hear how their approach brings out the exceptional qualities and talents in dyslexic individuals.

In our discussion, we explored their new approach to dyslexia that begins not with definitions but with how the dyslexic mind functions. We covered the various ways dyslexia can manifest beyond reading challenges, why some twice-exceptional dyslexic kids are often overlooked under traditional definitions, and the importance of embracing dyslexia as part of one's identity. We also dove into strategies for advocating with schools to secure accommodations and discussed different ways students can thrive academically.

This updated edition of The Dyslexic Advantage also highlights how a strengths-centered framework is gaining traction in schools and workplaces, plus new insights into the neurobiology underlying dyslexia and its associated strengths. As you’ll hear from Brock and Fernette, understanding dyslexia more fully allows us to open up conversations with educators about alternative learning strategies that may benefit not just our kids, but all students in the classroom.

About Drs. Brock and Fernette Eide

Leading experts on dyslexia and authors of the groundbreaking book The Dyslexic Advantage: Unlocking the Hidden Potential of the Dyslexic Brain, Brock Eide, MD, MA, and Fernette Eide, MD, have been at the forefront of redefining our understanding of dyslexia. In the updated 2023 edition, they incorporate the latest research and modern techniques to highlight a strength-based approach to dyslexia, moving away from traditional deficit-focused models. This revision features 20 new interviews, insights into how a strengths-centered framework is being implemented in schools and workplaces, and fresh information on the neurobiology that underpins dyslexia and its associated strengths.

The Eides advocate for viewing dyslexia as a unique learning and processing style rather than a disorder. Their influential work has played a pivotal role in transforming conventional views on dyslexia and has inspired countless individuals. Together, they are the authors of The Dyslexic Advantage and The Mislabeled Child, and they founded the nonprofit organization Dyslexic Advantage and the social purpose company Neurolearning.com. They reside in Edmonds, Washington, with their son.

Things you'll learn

How the traditional focus on weaknesses in dyslexia overlooks the strengths that dyslexic individuals possess
Why the definition of dyslexia include diverse cognitive processing styles beyond reading challenges
Why it’s important to recognize the unique learning profiles of twice exceptional children when addressing dyslexia
How stealth dyslexia in gifted individuals can lead to underdiagnosis and missed support opportunities
The role that a strengths-based perspective plays in helping dyslexic individuals excel in areas requiring experience-based reasoning

Resources mentioned

The Dyslexic Advantage (Brock and Fernette’s nonprofit organization)
The Dyslexic Advantage (Revised and Updated): Unlocking the Hidden Potential of the Dyslexic Brain by Drs. Brock and Fernette Eide
The Mislabeled Child: Looking Beyond Behavior to Find the True Sources and Solutions for Children's Learning Challenge by Drs. Brock and Fernette Eide
Neurolearning (dyslexia screening and strengths assessment)

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TPP 164a: Dr. Melissa Neff on Diagnosing and Treating Adults Newly Identified as Differently Wired Nov 08, 2024

Show notes

Licensed clinical psychologist Dr. Melissa Neff talks about the unique challenges for adults who discover their own neurodivergence as a result of going through the diagnostic process with their children.

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