Friends in Formation

Latest Episodes:

Stages of life and faith · “Disturb me Lord” · Knowing when to pause Jun 02, 2023

The final episode of this season of Friends in Formation covers listener questions on why spiritual formation "clicks" at certain ages, whether we should pray the prayer "Disturb me, Lord" (Sir Frances Drake), and knowing when to take a break from something.

Sabbath · Reading Protestant and Catholic Authors · Praying for One Another Jan 27, 2023

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To submit a question for James, Richella, and Nate to consider discussing on Friends in Formation, email friends@renovare.org.

Listener questions guide our hosts into a fruitful discussion about moving from theory to practice in the discipline of Sabbath, exploring historic Christian writers both inside and outside of your own tradition, and learning to pray for others.

Three listener questions—

I've become a John Mark Comer fan, thanks to your recommendation of his book, The Ruthless Elimination Hurry, on one of your earliest podcasts over the past year or two. That book and some other resources of his have piqued my interest in practicing Sabbath. Could each of you share what your Sabbath looks like—the practical aspects of it. When? How long? What do you do? I want to take this from an idea to a habit and would love to hear how y'all do this. I love the podcast. It always inspires me to draw closer to Jesus. Thanks.
I’ve been a Protestant Christian many years. I'm definitely not averse to spiritual wisdom from believers in other traditions. I've had a spiritual director for about six years, and she always points me to resources by Roman Catholics. It kind of bothers me that it seems that there is relatively little by Protestants on deep spiritual formation. Is it just my lack of knowledge or are Protestants much less likely to explore these sorts of issues? I feel almost guilty to be reading all these things outside of my tradition. Do Protestants not care about the issues that Roman Catholic writers address?
Hi friends. How do you pray for one? I hear people talk about the power of prayer, and I'm interested in going deeper in prayer, but I've wondered how specific I should be in my prayer request, and how do I know whether I should trust someone with my prayer request?

Resources:

The Ruthless Elimination Hurry, by John Mark Comer
Deeper Experiences of Famous Christians, by James G Lawson
A Serious Call to a Devout and Holy Life, by William Law - 158pp
Hearing God, by Dallas Willard
Spiritual Classics, Richard Foster and Emilie Griffin
Devotional Classics, Richard Foster and James Bryan Smith
Other writers recommended on this episode:
- Martin Luther
- John Wesley
- Corrie ten Boom
- Catherine Marshall
- Frank Laubach
- Thomas Kelly
- John Ortberg
- James Brian Smith
- Nathan Foster
- Richella Parham
- James Catford
- John Bunyan
- Louisa May Alcott

Trials vs Temptation · What Trips You Up · Measuring Spiritual Progress Dec 26, 2022

Want to Suggest a Question?

To submit a question for James, Richella, and Nate to consider discussing on Friends in Formation, email friends@renovare.org.

Show Notes
In this month’s episode of Friends in Formation, Richella, Nate, and James answer listener questions about Dallas Willard’s version of The Lord’s Prayer, what things get the goat of our hosts, and how to measure progress in one’s spiritual formation.

Three listener questions—

Question 1: I've been working on praying without ceasing using Dallas' version of The Lord's Prayer. I like his modern translation very much. But when I got to the part that reads "please don't put us through trials" it made me pause. Because the Bible says that ordinary trials, while difficult, build endurance, strengthen us, help us to build character and to grow in faith. Ordinary trials are part of Dallas' golden triangle of spiritual formation. So why do you think Dallas chose the word "trials" instead of "temptations" in his version of the prayer?
Question 2: You all sound peaceful, reflective, open, yet humble on Friends in Formation! But could you share what repeatedly 'gets your goat' or trips you up? How do you turn to the Lord each time, how do you think you're being formed through those moments and do you (or should you) see any 'end' to that particular niggle.
Question 3: Is it possible to ‘measure’ or ‘assess’ progress in Christian formation either in oneself or in others (if we have some pastoral oversight of them)?

Resources

The Divine Conspiracy, by Dallas Willard
Mirror for the Soul: A Christian Guide to the Enneagram, by Alice Fryling
The Spiritual Formation Workbook, by James Bryan Smith and Lynda Graybeal
Streams of Living Water, by Richard Foster
Renewing the Christian Mind, by Dallas Willard and Gary Black, Jr.
Renovaré Institute

Image Bearing · Exploring Church Traditions · Stability in Times of Discontent Nov 21, 2022

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To submit a question for James, Richella, and Nate to consider discussing on Friends in Formation, email friends@renovare.org.

Show Notes

Three Listener Questions—

[2:35] My question concerns a phrase I hear you use often in Renovaré — referring to people as “Image Bearers.” I must admit this always makes me sit up as it was not a phrase I had encountered much. At first I wondered if it was just a poetic way of referring to humanity, but am coming to realize it is an important truth and attitude but one I feel I have lacked - I think because my evangelical background had focused more on the 'depravity of Man' and begins viewing humanity (especially oneself) from a position of sinfulness, where the Image of God is lost and only restored in Christ. Specifically, HOW you have learnt to see yourself and others as Image Bearers, not just as a theological belief but in practice, and how doing this helps your spiritual formation.

[17:46] I am currently reading The Ruthless Elimination of Hurry (and trying, reasonably, to take my time with it), and next on the list is Streams of Living Water. Some dear church friends have begun to visit the churches of other friends — ones they know have a true, deep relationship with God — who attend churches of different denominations, in order to gain a better appreciation and understanding of their traditions. I find myself wishing that we, too, had many friends of other denominations who could not only serve as our safeguards, but with whom we could afterward discuss their traditions and church’s values, and process those of our own more objectively and reflectively. We would greatly appreciate any suggestions you could offer as to how to go about this.

[31:33] From two different listeners in ministry positions:

What do you do when you feel like you are in a setting that God hasn’t called you to? I’m a new, young clergy, I graduated seminary last year and feel like I’ve been placed (or have fallen into) a ministry appointment doing work that I’m not called to do but am doing because I have the skills to do this work. What can I do to not just survive during this difficult season but thrive? And have hope that God did indeed call me into a life of ministry and I’m here in this space for a reason?
After serving several different churches as a pastor for about 9 years, I am almost 1 year removed from professional pastoral ministry. I chose to stop working as a pastor because the added strain of COVID left me burnt out, depressed, and codependent. I am very grateful to say that I am in a much better place now than I have been for quite some time. I am healthier physically, mentally, and emotionally. God has provided for my family financially. My family and I are connected to a wonderful church. I can definitely tell, even now, that God has brought me to this place as a blessing to provide me with the healing I desperately needed. At the same time, I am struggling with being “set aside” from ministry. I had a very clear calling experience a couple years before my pastoral ministry started. Being a pastor is the only real full-time job that I’ve had before now. I am currently working at a factory, and while it is a blessing in many ways, I find myself constantly looking to what might be next. Do you have any advice on how to better live into and accept where God has me right now? I have no doubt that I am where God wants me to be, but I still find myself constantly thinking about and planning for any and every possible “next thing.”

Resources

The Ruthless Elimination of Hurry: How to Stay Emotionally Healthy and Spiritually Alive in the Chaos of the Modern World, by John Mark Comer
Streams of Living Water, by Richard Foster
Clinging: The Experience of Prayer, by Emilie Griffin

QE II · Injustice in the Church · Prayer Labyrinths Sep 26, 2022

Want to Suggest a Question?

To submit a question for James, Richella, and Nate to consider discussing on Friends in Formation, email friends@renovare.org.

In this month’s episode of Friends in Formation, James, Nate, and Richella answer listener questions about the passing of Queen Elizabeth II, unfairness and injustice in the church, and prayer labyrinths.

Show Notes

[1:20] I want us to reflect together on the death of Her Majesty Queen Elizabeth, because this is a big world event. We have a lot of folks who have indicated that they’re interested in what all this means, how things fit together in the faith of a very public person.

[15:13] How do we respond to unfairness and injustice in the Christian context?

[31:16] A church near me has just built a new prayer labyrinth in their side garden, and I have the desire to visit it. I have prayed and meditated using a labyrinth in the past, but I have always struggled keeping my mind on the Lord. What are some suggestions for how I can focus in, slow down, and use the labyrinth to connect deeply with God?

Resources

Try Softer, by Aundi Kolber

View of God · Reading habits · When to pray for healing Aug 30, 2022

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To submit a question for James, Richella, and Nate to consider discussing on Friends in Formation, email friends@renovare.org.
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In this month’s episode of Friends in Formation, Richella, James, and Nate answer listener questions about wrestling with unhealthy views of God, habits that can help us read deeply, and whether to pray for someone's healing right away, or only after feeling led to do so.

Show Notes

[1:10] A.W Tozer opens his Knowledge of the Holy with, “What comes into our minds when we think about God is the most important thing about us.” Dallas Willard wrote that if our view of God does not allow us to wholly give ourselves to God in love, you need to rethink your theology until it does. Question: what significant view of God have you wrestled with successfully?

[14:59] Have you experienced integration over the years in your written conversations: in devotional reading, in journaling... and in the two intertwined?

[28:02] Should you wait until you feel led to pray for someone's healing, or should you jump right in and just do it?

Resources

Atomic Habits, by James Clear
Abandonment to Divine Providence, Jean-Pierre de Caussade
The Knowledge of the Holy: The Attributes of God, A. W. Tozer
For more on "view of God," see also:
- Discovering our Spiritual Identity: Practices for God's Beloved, by Trevor Hudson
- The Good and Beautiful God, by James Bryan Smith

Streams · Fasting · Spiritual Conversations with Adult Children Jul 25, 2022

Want to Suggest a Question?
To submit a question for James, Richella, and Nate to consider discussing on Friends in Formation, email friends@renovare.org.

In this month’s episode of Friends in Formation, Nate, Richella, and James answer listener questions about which Christian Stream “gives the most bang for the buck,” how to discern when to fast (or practice any spiritual discipline), and how to have spiritual conversations with kids who are grown.

[2:32] Of the Six Streams, which is the best one to sit in that gives the most bang for the buck in the journey of Christian spiritual formation?

[19:24] I struggle a lot in my day-to-day life with decision fatigue, second-guessing myself, and fears about not being "good enough." This past school term, I developed a very beneficial rhythm of weekly fasting and found the practice deeply helpful. However, now that I'm on my summer schedule that old rhythm no longer works well and I haven't fasted consistently. Whenever it's been a while since I've fasted, I start thinking about it frequently, even every day or every meal and fretting about whether it's a good time or not…. Are there some stabilizing questions or thoughts that I can come back to when I start to debate fasting? What are valid vs. invalid reasons not to fast, be it in the moment or for a season?

[37:50] What are some suggestions in talking to adult children about spiritual matters?

Resources Mentioned

Richard Foster, Streams of Living Water
Series on the Cycle of Grace from Upper Room Ministries
Trevor Hudson and Jerry Haas, The Cycle of Grace: Living in Sacred Balance

Learning Joy · Caregiving Well · Confrontation Jun 27, 2022

Want to Suggest a Question?

To submit a question for James, Richella, and Nate to consider discussing on Friends in Formation, email friends@renovare.org.
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In this month’s episode of Friends in Formation, Nate, Richella, and James answer listener questions about training in joy, how to be a "friend in formation" to a spouse with dementia, and knowing when to confront someone's sin.

[1:13] I’ve been a (hopefully) honest apprentice of Jesus for over 50 years, but I've always struggled with a lack of joy in my life. I recently came to the thought that perhaps experiencing joy is something that needs training, much like learning how to live in the constant flow of grace. If this is true, what spiritual disciplines might be best to allow a person to enter into a greater experience of joy. Thank you again for your willingness to share your tremendous expertise in Kingdom living in this setting. I feel as though I'm getting to know the three of you in an interesting, very pleasant way. I look forward to actually meeting you in about 50 years.

[15:22] Three years ago, the love of my life came down with dementia. Her dementia has progressed to the point where she's unable to communicate verbally. And a little while ago, her safety and my own health, led me to place her in a home. I visit her on a regular basis and want her to know that she's not only loved by me and our family, but that our heavenly Father loves her as well. I know there is a communication of the heart. So I try to sing to her simple love songs, like “You are My Sunshine,” as well as hymns that she grew up with, as well as holding her hands while I pray for her. I want her to know the peace that will sustain her as we journey together through this horrible disease. Do you have any suggestions? How can I be a “friend in formation” to her?

[25:49] It sounds like you hold to a reticence in confronting, except when absolutely necessary. Can you flesh that out a bit, in light of Galatians 6:1, Matthew 18:15-17, and other passages that seem to instruct us that part of love is to kindly address others. How do we discern when it is necessary, good and loving to address someone else's sin?

Resources

Dallas Willard, Life without Lack
Richard Foster, Celebration of Discipline

Saying No to Good Things · Faith of Origin · Bodies and Formation May 23, 2022

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To submit a question for James, Richella, and Nate to consider discussing on Friends in Formation, email friends@renovare.org.
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[1:26] In the stage of life me and my husband are in—we have three young children, jobs, and we are involved in our local church, there are lots of opportunities to do good things. When I sit down and look at our family calendar, I feel overwhelmed and unable to do all that I set out to do! How do I know what to say "no" to, and how do I say "no" without feeling guilty?

[16:20] When moving forward to understand some of the deep riches of other Christian traditions that have not been familiar to me I sometimes find myself looking back at my own stream of origin and being pretty grumpy. Does anyone else find this happens to them? Any tips on not falling, ironically, into judgementalism about our ‘family of origin’ in our faith?

[26:20] Does Christianity have a "body" problem? What is the body and what is its connection to our spirituality as it relates to formation?

Resources

Richard Foster, Streams of Living Water
Dallas Willard, Renovation of the Heart (chapter 9)
Richella Parham, Mythical Me

Easy Yoke • True Freedom • Formation in Marriage Mar 28, 2022

Want to Suggest a Question?

To submit a question for James, Richella, and Nate to consider discussing on Friends in Formation, email friends@renovare.org.
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In this month’s episode of Friends in Formation, Richella, James, and Nate answer listener questions about the easy yoke Jesus talked about, experiencing true freedom, and spiritual formation in marriage.

Show Notes

[1:20] Is it possible to practice the spiritual disciplines out of a place of peace and rest from day one following Jesus, or is the easy and light yoke only the prize at the end of the journey? It just feels so often like the spiritual disciplines are another form of religious performance, and the rest Jesus promises remains a distant hope.

[18:08] I have been thinking of freedom - Galatians 5:1. I notice when I talk with other Christians that there is fear and resistance when it comes to freedom. Why is that if this is something Christ wants us to truly experience? What does true freedom look like in ordinary everyday life? Are there practices that help position us to experience true freedom more as Christ desires for us?

[31:18] How can we work toward a faith-filled marriage? What can spiritual formation look like in the context of marriage? How do each of you share spiritual life with your spouses?

Resources

Evelyn Underhill’s Prayer Book, by Robyn Wrigley-Carr
Sacrament of the Present Moment, by Jean-Pierre de Caussade

Discipleship vs Formation · Transforming Thoughts · The Role of Rootedness Feb 28, 2022

To submit a question for James, Richella, and Nate to consider discussing on Friends in Formation, email friends@renovare.org.

In this month’s episode of Friends in Formation, Nate, James, and Richella answer listener questions about the difference between spiritual formation and discipleship, transforming negative thoughts, and virtual spiritual interactions and the role of rootedness.

Show Notes

[1:44] What is the difference between spiritual formation and discipleship?

[14:28] Dwight L Moody says "Character is what you are in the dark." My early morning, just woken up thoughts, are often fearful, negative, and sometimes bitter. Once I focus on, say Psalm 23, The Lord's prayer or some other quiet, spiritual reading or reflection I feel the bubbling bitterness leaving me, and as the day unfolds, I do pray, reflect, and ask Jesus to be with me in all parts of my day. I am worried, however, that the real me is to be found in those first angry thoughts. Can I reach a point where these thoughts don't feature without suppressing them through gritted teeth?

[29:49] We are moving to more and more virtual spiritual interactions. But somehow I think God means us to be rooted in place, location, family, people. How should we as Image-Bearers handle this new challenge?

Resources

Let Go, by François Fénelon
The Seeking Heart, by François Fénelon

Streams, Spiritual Formation Groups, and Building Friendships Jan 24, 2022

In this month’s episode of Friends in Formation, Richella, Nate, and James answer listener questions about the Streams, moving small groups toward spiritual formation, and building lifelong friendships in this time of loneliness.

Show Notes

[1:47] In December's podcast, James mentioned six different “Streams” of Christian tradition: contemplative, holiness, charismatic, social justice, evangelical and incarnational (sacramental). Could you please talk more about them, both as they relate to the church and to an individual Christ follower? Also, I grew up in a church who used "missional" language. Is this a concept that is related to the 'streams'?

[18:25] I’ve been a pastor for 15 years, and most groups seem to be more curriculum based/Bible study rather than actually focused on formation. Do you have any thoughts about how existing classes or small groups can move toward becoming more focused on spiritual formation or any thoughts on how to change the culture of a church to be more focused on spiritual formation? Is it better to start new groups than trying to change existing groups? Can you share resources related to spiritual formation groups? Do you have information about Renovaré spiritual formation groups?

[31:14] A question I've been wondering about revolves around the topic of friendship. Even before the social distancing of the last couple of years there has been a trend in loneliness. Often, as we grow older and especially as we get further from our school years, it becomes increasingly more difficult to make and build friendships. Are there any practices you would recommend for responding to loneliness and for making and building friendships throughout all of life?

Resources

Streams of Living Water, by Richard Foster
The Making of an Ordinary Saint, by Nathan Foster
Spiritual Formation Workbook, a Renovaré Resource
Devotional Classics, a Renovaré Resource
Lyfe, Resources from the Bible Society UK

Living in the Tension Dec 27, 2021

Want to Suggest a Question?

To submit a question for James, Richella, and Nate to consider discussing on Friends in Formation, email friends@renovare.org.
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In this episode, Nate, James, and Richella answer listener questions about reconciling Jesus' “easy yoke” with Paul's “beating his body to make it his slave,” remaining healthy while carrying other’s burdens, and Bishop Desmond Tutu’s “seamless robe” between religion and politics.

[:50] How do you reconcile the gentleness of the easy yoke that Jesus talks about regarding our efforts toward our spiritual formation (Matthew 11:28-30) with the more brutal approach that Paul talks about when he says he "beats his body" ("punish" NRSV) to make it his slave (1 Corinthians 9:27)?

[16:42] What are the practices you engage in to remain healthy in the midst of heavy burdens you're helping carry for others?

[30:06] Bishop Desmond Tutu once said that religion and politics are a seamless robe. I think I agree with him, but I’m really troubled by the way churches and Christians in North America have become so bitterly divided by politics over the past decade or two. How should churches, as well as Christians individually, handle political issues? Should we remain silent on them in order to maintain the unity of the Spirit? Or do we need to lovingly speak out about how our spiritual values should affect our political priorities and then just love each other despite our sometimes major differences? If it’s the latter, I’d appreciate any advice you can give on doing that, as it’s especially hard now that both sides equally fear that our country’s entire future is at stake.

Resources

Renovation of the Heart, by Dallas Willard (chapter 9)
The Journal of John Woolman, edited by Phillips P. Moulton
Streams of Living Water, by Richard Foster
Weight of Glory, by C.S. Lewis
Culture Care, by Makoto Fujimura

Spiritual Practices for Busy People · Why Go Back to Church · Judging Family Members Nov 22, 2021

Want to Suggest a Question?

To submit a question for James, Richella, and Nate to consider discussing on Friends in Formation, email friends@renovare.org.

Show Notes

In this month’s episode of Friends in Formation, Nate, Richella, and James answer listener questions about practices to help keep centered on Christ with a busy schedule, returning to church when you are not feeling loved there, and the struggle of judging family members.

[1:21] I am an older student attending junior college and working at the school newspaper part time. I find it a struggle to keep up a rhythm of life because so much of my schedule is dictated by what my professors assign or the chaotic nature of working at a newspaper. In this arena the unexpected is common. What types of practices would you suggest to help me keep centered on Christ?

[15:58] My question wants to be: Why are church people so unloving… so rigid in being right that they fail to love people in such sad places? And why should I go back to church now, if that’s what I’m going to face?

[27:34] God has made me aware of my judgmental attitude towards my family members. How can I grow in this area and not only keep my comments and advice to myself, but also let go of that judgement which is in my heart?

Resources

Life Without Lack, by Dallas Willard
An Unhurried Life: Follow Jesus’ Rhythms of Work and Rest, by Alan Fadling
The Journal of John Woolman, edited by Phillips P. Moulton

Losing Faith · Contentment · Spiritual Practices 101 Oct 25, 2021

In this month’s episode of Friends in Formation, Richella, Nate, and James answer listener questions about losing faith, contentment, and where to start with spiritual practices.

[1:25] The three of you have been addressing questions/concerns from parents who are grieving at the waning faith of the children they so lovingly raised. I'm writing as the 22-year old son of two God-fearing parents. To put it try to put it concisely, here is my question: I barely know a life outside of church & a personal relationship with Jesus. All through high school and college I gave a lot of my life to serving ministries. But now that my faith is slipping away, I feel like not only a square peg in a round hole at church, but having lost a sense of mission/purpose, I also feel like a square peg in a round hole in the world. Losing faith has been doubly alienating. What advice do you have for someone who grew up in the church and is now losing faith? When I'm in a circle praying at Bible study, I ask myself, "what am I even doing here?" I want my conviction-driven life back, but I don't know how.... and it's just so hard.

[13:52] Paul says in Phil 4:12-13 that he has learned to be content through the strength of Christ. I lack contentment big time. I've looked for discussions of how to learn contentment but not found any that are not simplistic. Would you please speak to how one can learn contentment?

[28:17] I work with college students who are just beginning to become aware of their internal lives and engage in the spiritual rhythms. My question is: How do you begin to introduce spiritual practices to people who have little experience in engaging with their inner lives?

Resources

Everything Happens for a Reason, by Kate Bowler
A Spiritual Formation Workbook, by James Bryan Smith and Linda Graybeal
Lyfe, resources from the British Bible Society
Starting Your Spiritual Journey, Videos on the Streams by Joe Davis
The Making of an Ordinary Saint, by Nathan Foster

Women in Ministry · The Trinity · Spiritual Direction Sep 27, 2021

Want to Suggest a Question?

To submit a question for James, Richella, and Nate to consider discussing on Friends in Formation, email friends@renovare.org.

In this month’s episode of Friends in Formation, James, Richella, and Nate answer listener questions about women in ministry and gender roles, the Trinity, and Spiritual Direction.

Show Notes

[3:40] We've got several questions about women in ministry, question about gender roles, and different hurdles that women like a young mother might face for different spiritual practices.

[19:08] A couple of listeners have asked questions focusing on communicating with the Trinity when having inner dialogue with God, the Father, Jesus, the Eternal Son, and the Holy Spirit and who to address, who to pray to and why.

[33:14] Many people ask us about Spiritual Direction. Would a Spiritual Director be helpful to me to draw closer to the heart of God or would this be one more interesting diversion from personally hearing from God? How do we think about Spiritual Direction in community? Should I find a Spiritual Director rather than a mentor?

Resources

Rage Becomes Her by Soraya Chemaly
The Making of Biblical Womanhood: How the Subjugation of Women Became Gospel Truth by Beth Allison Barr
Worship, Community, and the Triune God of Grace by James B. Torrance
Life in the Trinity by Donald Fairbairn
The God Revealed in Jesus Christ: An Introduction to Trinitarian Theology published by Grace Communion International
The Great Dance: The Christian Vision Revisited by C. Baxter Kruger
Mythical Me by Richella J. Parham

Treasures · Struggles With Church · Accountability Without Legalism Aug 30, 2021

In this episode, Richella, Nate, and James address honest listener questions about treasures and issues of the heart, issues with the Church, and how to have healthy accountability without it becoming rigid and legalistic.

[1:48] What did Jesus mean when he said store up for yourself treasures in heaven? And in a practical sense how do I store up treasure in heaven?
[15:00] Here we address several related questions regarding turmoil in the church, that the church feels difficult for a lot of people, and the pain of adult children leaving the church.
[29:16] Would you address the issue of accountability - resources seem to recommend a list of questions to ask each other, but that seems formulaic and potentially legalistic. Is accountability best done in a group or 1:1? Do you have any ideas for us to get started with?

Resources Mentioned

Dallas Willard, The Divine Conspiracy
Dallas Willard, Knowing Christ Today (Chapter 8: Pastors as Teachers of the Nations)
James Bryan Smith with Lynda, A Spiritual Formation Workbook
Cindy Bunch, Be Kind to Yourself
John Wesley: Accountability Questions
Song: Brethren We have Met to Worship
Renovaré Podcasts with Paul Patton

Solitude · Sabbath with Small Kids · When Grown Kids Leave the Church Jul 19, 2021

In this episode, Richella, Nate, and James discuss honest listener questions regarding silence and solitude, Sabbath, and adult children walking away from the church.

[1:00] Why do some people find the practice of silence and solitude so hard, and not letting the distractions of the day interrupt a time of listening for God's voice?
[14:15] In seeking and walking out apprenticeship, I’ve found it difficult to Sabbath well. How can you observe Sabbath well when you have little kids?
[26:50] Going back to a previous conversation regarding the church, how do I handle my adult children walking away from church?

Resources Mentioned

Henry Nouwen, The Return of the Prodigal Son
Smith and Graybeal, A Spiritual Formation Workbook
James Bryan Smith, Embracing the Love of God
Dallas Willard, Life Without Lack
James Fowler, Stages of Faith
Song: Can You Count the Stars

Have a question for us to consider? Email friends@renovare.org.

Humility · Disappointment with God · Feeling Like a Square Peg at Church Jun 28, 2021

In this month’s episode of Friends in Formation, James, Richella, and Nate discuss honest listener questions about growing in humility, being disappointed with God, and feeling like a square peg in a round hole at church.

[3:12] What disciplines are helpful for growing humility, other than service? Also how do you define humility?
[14:25] If I’m honest, I don’t think God has done well by me.
[28:12] I feel like a square peg in a round hole when attending church. How widespread is spiritual abuse and what are its dangers?

Resources Mentioned

Richella Parham, Mythical Me: Finding Freedom from Constant Comparison
K.J. Ramsey, This Too Shall Last: Finding Grace When Suffering Lingers
C.S. Lewis, The Horse and His Boy

Have a question for us to consider? Email friends@renovare.org.

How to Read the Bible + Its Tricky Parts, and Understanding Spiritual Abuse May 24, 2021

In this month’s episode of Friends in Formation, James, Richella, and Nate discuss different ways to read the Bible (big chunks, small bites, meditating, memorizing, and changing it up), what to do with tricky texts in Scripture, and how to spot spiritual abuse.

[:53] How do you approach Bible reading?
[16:28] How do you handle tricky sections of Scripture?
[30:20] How widespread is spiritual abuse and what are its dangers?

Resources Mentioned

Life with God Bible
Wesleyan Quadrilateral
The Bible Project
Hard Sayings of the Bible Series, Intervarsity Press
F.F. Bruce, Hard Sayings of Jesus
Nick Page, The Badly Behaved Bible
Renovaré Podcast Episode: Luci Shaw – On Poetry, Creativity, and Madeleine L’Engle
Richard Foster, The Challenge of the Disciplined Life
Lisa Oakley and Justin Humphries, Escaping the Maze of Spiritual Abuse: Creating Healthy Christian Cultures
Wade Mullen

Have a question for us to consider? Email friends@renovare.org.

Spiritual Formation, Fasting, and Unwanted Ill-Will Apr 26, 2021

In this episode, James, Richella, and Nate attempt to explain spiritual formation in layman's terms, and address questions about fasting and struggling with feeling ill-will toward others.

[1:18] Can you explain spiritual formation in layman's terms?
[15:50] Fasting - I'm totally sold on the idea of fasting, and I’ve read a lot of material on fasting, and even given a few devotional lessons on fasting, yet I'm still struggling with even wanting to fast or getting the results I hope to get – an increased sense of the Lord’s presence, spiritual breakthroughs in some personal issues. I struggle with answers to prayer. Please help.
[34:03] I’m experiencing greater levels of ill-will toward others, and I’m concerned about where this ill will is coming from. Do you have advice on how to handle it?

Resources Mentioned

Song: The Great Physician
Daniel Siegel, Mindsight: The New Science of Personal Transformation

Have a question for us to consider? Email friends@renovare.org. Learn more about Renovaré and find lots of resources for spiritual formation at renovare.org.

Twaddle, Social Justice, and Nurturing Gentleness Mar 15, 2021

In this month’s episode of Friends in Formation, Richella, James, and Nate answer honest listener questions regarding Safety in the Kingdom of God, social justice concerns, and nurturing a character of peacefulness and gentleness.

[0:40] I recognize it is probably uncomfortable to acknowledge that God may not keep us safe from an earthly perspective, but Christianity is nothing if it does not provide us tools for understanding and living our sometimes extremely difficult lives. And from another listener: I was a missionary in PNG time and again I would encounter tribes on the road in conflict. My kids were in the back of the pickup . I would put my landcruiser in four wheel drive 2 gear in case I was set upon. I was prepared to go through the tribe. Was I scared you bet
[14:52] In your opinion, how can the church begin to have a stronger voice in issues of social justice?
[27:28] What practices have you found that have helped you grow in peacefulness and gentleness? How have you been able to keep peace and calm lately with all that is going on?

Resources Mentioned

Dallas Willard, Life Without Lack
Ronald Sider, I Am Not a Social Activist: Making Jesus the Agenda
John Mark Comer, The Ruthless Elimination of Hurry
African Enterprise

Submit any questions you would like us to consider on future podcast episodes to friends@renovare.org. Learn more about Renovaré and find lots of resources for spiritual formation at renovare.org.

Are We Safe with God, Realistic Rhythms, and Healthy News Habits Feb 15, 2021

In this month’s episode of Friends in Formation, Richella, James, and Nate discuss honest listener questions about safety within the Kingdom of God, rhythms of spiritual practice in a busy life, and how to listen to the news.

[0:45] Dallas Willard comments on the gospel and how living within the kingdom brings safety. Could you comment on what Dallas might have meant by safe within the kingdom when the kingdom is “here but not yet” fully present?
[11:40] My question, as a husband, a father of four young children, and a pastor of a church, I find it incredibly difficult to create a rhythm of spiritual practice. Every day is scheduled so differently and carving a quiet moment of meditation, contemplation, solitude, or any other attentive discipline is all but impossible in this season of life. In Richard Foster's "Sanctuary of the Soul" he suggests that parents of young children "rest easy" for the time being until the children need less attention. My kids are 3, 5, 7, and 9 and I find them even busier than when they were infants. Do you have any suggestions?
[27:40] I'm a newspaper (news outlet) dabbler. For many years I never read and even avoided the news and now I read a little every day, spending ideally less than 15 minutes of my day. How would Jesus read/listen to the news our day and age? Put differently, how should the gospel of the kingdom's availability effect how we inform ourselves about current events?

Submit any questions you would like us to consider on future podcast episodes to friends@renovare.org. Learn more about Renovaré and find lots of resources for spiritual formation at renovare.org.

What is the Kingdom of God? Jan 18, 2021

In this month’s episode of Friends in Formation, Richella, James, and Nate discuss:

The Availability of the Kingdom of God
Prayer
Loneliness in these times

Resources Mentioned

Dallas Willard, The Divine Conspiracy
J. P. Moreland, Finding Quiet: My Story of Overcoming Anxiety and the Practices that Brought Peace

Submit any questions you would like us to consider on future podcast episodes to friends@renovare.org. Learn more about Renovaré and find lots of resources for spiritual formation at renovare.org.

Introducing Friends in Formation Jan 13, 2021

Welcome to a new podcast from Renovaré where three very different friends—James Catford, Nathan Foster, and Richella Parham—discuss listener questions about life and faith, with the goal of listening, learning, and helping one another go deeper with God.

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