Finding the Throughline with Kate Hanley

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[Comfort Podcasts]: Forgive Your Financial Mistakes, Ep. 897 Mar 01, 2023

Continuing on this week’s theme of comfort (I’m replaying episodes this as I’m dealing with the aftermath of appendicitis) I’m re-sharing this episode from 2021 where I talk about why we feel so badly about money decisions we wished we’d done differently, and share an exercise to help you process some of that angst and get some good money energy flowing again.

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[Comfort Podcasts]: The Surprisingly Deep Reason Why Feeling Cozy Matters , Ep. 896 Feb 27, 2023

Hi! So… I ended up having my appendix out just as my podcast episodes were due. Which is why I’m replaying episodes this week–and in honor of what I’m needing in my life right now, they are the episodes that bring me, and hopefully you, the most comfort.

Today’s episode takes a deep dive in to coziness, and why, surprisingly, it is a biological imperative that makes all kinds of wonderful, important things possible. Like, feeling safe. And healing. And dreaming. So get ready to feel better about getting cozy AF!!

(And in other news, by now my surgery was over a week ago and I should be laughing, coughing, and sitting up like a champ.)

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Visit Katie at her Haven NY Website

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[Things to Stop Doing]: 3 Tricks to Stop Blowing off Your Self-Care, Ep. 895 Feb 24, 2023

Today’s thing to stop doing, is blowing off your self-care, whatever that may be–going to bed at a decent time, getting some movement during the day, or calling your friend and having a mutual venting session.

I can just hear you thinking, Kate, you say this week is about doing less but it sounds like today you’re telling me to do more.

But really this is about stopping resisting your inspirations around taking better care of yourself. Which frees up a whole bunch of energy–energy you can put into doing those things that make you feel like a better version of yourself.

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[Things to Stop Doing]: Why Venting Is Better Than Complaining, Ep. 894 Feb 22, 2023

Today’s thing to do less of is complaining. Complaining is a real slippery slope, because even though it feels constructive–because you’re airing your feelings–it tends to only make things worse because it causes you to really focus on what’s going wrong, and what we pay attention to only gets bigger. Like the tiny little pimple on your nose that you poke at and pick at and it turns in to a big angry red bump.

Which is not to say that you need to be a saint, or a martyr, and find a way to not be bothered by anything ever again.

This is where venting comes in. Let’s break down the difference.

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[Things to Stop Doing]: 3 Ways to Stop Taking Things Personally, Ep. 893 Feb 20, 2023

This week is all about things you can stop doing. Because sometimes being a better person isn’t only about the doing, you know? Sometimes it’s about doing less.

The first thing you can stop doing is taking things personally. Which just makes whatever has happened about you, when really, everything someone else says or does is about them.

So if you’re not going to take it personally, and make it about you, how are you going to take it??

Positive psychology talks a lot about lenses–or tools that you can use to color how you see the world. If you’re going to put down the “this is about me” lens, here are three others that you can try on to help you shift out of that personal upset.

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[Mood-Lifters]: When Your Day Goes Sideways, Ep. 892 Feb 17, 2023

We all know that sometimes, something happens to hijack your day–and your mood. (It happened to me the day before I wrote this episode; I share the details of how my afternoon got hijacked by a call from my son’s vice principal.). Today I’m sharing a three step approach that spells out ARC, which is apt, because these three steps are like a rainbow bridge that can take you from upset to stable.

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[Mood-Lifters]: Build a Mood-Friendly Routine, Ep. 891 Feb 15, 2023

Setting up a routine can help keep your mood in a good place, as opposed to waking up and just starting to react to whatever presents itself, which leaves you feeling pulled in a million different directions, frazzled, and probably low mood. In this episode I share the different ways to think about what to put in that daily routine so that you know you’re taking good care of yourself and your responsibilities–and that helps your mood stay steady.

Related episode: Morning Ritual to Clear Your Head

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[Mood-Lifters]: 5 Quick Ways to Boost Your Mood, Ep. 890 Feb 13, 2023

Having your mood in a better place helps you be a better person–but there are so many things that can yank it around. In today’s episode I share 5 quick and remarkably effective ways to boost your mood. (And I share the movies and music I turn to again and again to lift my mood.)

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[De-cluttering]: What to Do With Unwanted Gifts, Ep. 889 Feb 10, 2023

So far this week we’ve talked about letting go of the things that belong to the person you used to be and how to make space for the person you actually are now. Today’s episode is a bit of a stickier wicket--and that is what to do about things that you don’t use, don’t need, but you feel like you can’t get rid of them because you received them as a gift or they have a very high sentimental value.

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[De-cluttering]: The Power of 5-Minute Routines to Get–and Stay–Organized, Ep. 888 Feb 08, 2023

De-cluttering and creating a more functional, more serene space isn’t a one and done deal. I cleaned out our refrigerator and freezer last week and while I’ve been loving the pristine-ness of those shelves and drawers, one trip to the grocery store and it’s looking kind of jumbled and there are some leftovers that are already starting to get pushed to the way back. No, decluttering is an ongoing thing–but one that you can make a quick and simple routine. That’s what this episode is all about.

Today I’m replaying an interview from April, 2021 with Katie McCan–an award-winning professional organizer from Westchester County, New York, who’s sharing quick and simple routines that will help us keep our homes streamlined, serene, and ready to support us in whatever we want to do in our daily life.

Follow Katie on Instagram

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[De-cluttering]: How to Make Space for New Energy, Ep. 887 Feb 06, 2023

This week I’m talking about decluttering–not for the sake of getting that minimalist look, although please, I drool over Instagram posts of clean, spare interiors. With a family of four homebodies who love having a project going, I don’t see our house ever looking that way, nor do I really want it to look that way. But believe me, I get the appeal.

No–this week, I’m talking about decluttering as a way of making space for new energy and giving your space and your psyche a little refresh. Ahhhhh.

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[Rest]: What Most People Get Wrong About Rest, Ep. 886 Feb 03, 2023

We have an idea that resting means doing nothing.

And it’s true that sometimes rest is passive.

Examples of passive rest include:

Sleeping
Napping
Getting a massage or other type of treatment, like acupuncture or reiki
Watching a show or movie
Lazing around and staring at the wall

All amazing forms of rest. I recommend them all highly.

But it’s a pretty short list that leaves out a whole other vital category of rest–and this is something that most people don’t even consider: active rest.

Listening to Dr. Dalton-Smith’s interview from Wednesday this week where she shared the seven different types of rest and what to do to counteract any rest deficits you may have, it only reinforces this truth: Sometimes rest means doing something. Because more than just meaning being physically still, rest is anything that brings you back into balance.

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[Rest]: There’s More to Feeling Rested Than Sleep–A Lot More, Ep. 885 Feb 01, 2023

Today I'm talking with Dr. Saundra Dalton-Smith, a Board-Certified internal medicine physician and work-life integration researcher. She's also the author of the book Sacred Rest. I'm fangirling a little bit because when Dr. Dalton-Smith was interviewed on a local NPR program, a friend of mine sent a link to our group chat and was so excited to tell us that being well-rested isn't just about getting sleep! We all got very excited to hear Dr. Dalton-Smith's message, because most of us, including me, struggle to get enough sleep a lot of the time. And I'm excited to share it with you!!

Dr. Dalton-Smith’s website

Take the rest quiz to identify your biggest rest deficit

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[Rest]: How Can I Be OK with Not Being Productive?, Ep. 884 Jan 30, 2023

This week I’m talking about rest. Not sleep, per se, but giving yourself what you need so that you can feel restored.

And today I’m answering a question from a listener named Libby, who writes:

“I’m having a hard time relaxing lately. It’s not necessarily that I’m stressed, it’s just that I find that I’m rarely doing nothing. I’m trying to be efficient with my time because there’s always so much to do, but it almost feels like a compulsion–to try to cross one more thing off my list. How can I teach myself to be OK with not being productive every minute of the day?”

I share my answer, but would love to hear how you’ve weaned yourself off the desire (or the need) to be doing something productive every minute of the day. Shoot me a message on Instagram or email me at kate@katehanley.com.

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[Grown-Up Glow Up]: My Go-To Number-One Strategy for Feeling Fabulous Even When I Don’t Feel Fabulous Ep. 883 Jan 27, 2023

When you’re in the midlife realm, t’s really easy to focus on the changes that your hair, face, skin, body are experiencing and label them as negative and feel bummed out.

Some days it’s like, how do I present myself in this new reality? So today I am sharing my go-to, number-one strategy for feeling fabulous–even when I don’t really feel fabulous. This strategy requires very little time, can be very inexpensive especially when you’re in to thrifting or your local buy nothing group although you can of course spend some money on it too. PLUS–I share a really silly story about my modeling debut at the Springhill Mall in Mobile, Alabama.

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[Grown-Up Glow Up]: Secrets for Great Skin Now–and Later, Ep. 882 Jan 25, 2023

This week is all about feeling good about how you look, especially when you’re in that midlife spin cycle where you feel like your appearance is changing before your very eyes. Today we're homing in on skincare at midlife--because your skin is literally the face you present to the world as well as an important component of health. And like every other part of you, it deserves your love and attention and support--not your blame or neglect.

I'm interviewing Alayne White, a well-known and beloved aesthetician here in Rhode Island about her non-nonsense yet ultra loving approach to skincare, and what it means--and what it takes--to feel beautiful.

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[Grown-Up Glow Up]: A Mantra for Loving How You Look Ep. 881 Jan 23, 2023

This week I’m talking about how to have a grown-up glow up. Glow up is what my kids call a makeover. But it’s not this radical transformation that we used to think of as a makeover–it’s more about highlighting your natural beauty and glowing from within because you love the way you look.

Today I’m sharing a mantra that can help you glow up as a grown-up, and really, it’s helpful in every other area of your life, too.

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[Making Changes]: You DO Have the Time to Do the Things You Want–Here’s Where It’s Hiding, Ep. 880 Jan 20, 2023

Take my one-question survey! (Thank you!)

One of the most common barriers to making a positive change is time.

We tell ourselves things like “I just don’t have time” or “there aren’t enough hours in the day,” and over time, telling yourself that you don’t have enough time to do the things you want and need to do creates a feeling of what behavioral economists call ‘time poverty.’

The paradox is that choosing to do the things you want to do makes you feel like you have more time (‘time affluence’), not less. Today I’m sharing HOW to claim that time and start feeling like the George Jefferson of time. (“Moo-hoovin’ on up!” 🎵)

Other relevant episodes: Make Time for Happiness with Dr. Cassie Holmes

Never Forget to Make an Appointment Again

Links to things I mentioned in this episode:

Research on how long it takes to form a habit

Wendy Wood’s book, Good Habits, Bad Habits

Cassie Holmes’ book, Happier Hour

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[Making Changes]: 2 Motivation Secrets to Get–and Keep–Going, Ep. 879 Jan 18, 2023

Take my one-question survey! (Thank you!)

Today I’m sharing two motivation secrets that can help you get going with whatever change you’re trying to make, and then help you keep going. One of them is pleasant, and the other, frankly, is kinda unpleasant. But it’s necessary, and it tends to work pretty well. So let’s break it down.

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[Making Changes]: 3 Ways to Make Change Easy (or at Least Easier), Ep. 878 Jan 16, 2023

Take my one-question survey! (Thank you!)

I’ve been doing a lot of reading about habits and behavior change for a book project I’m working on and I’ve learned some cool stuff about how to make it easier for yourself to do the things you want to do–especially when those things are new, or at least outside your typical day-to-day experience. And since we’re early in the new year, when the desire to clean things up and do things differently is still high but our motivation is already starting to wane, now feels like a good time to share some of these things with you.

Today I’m sharing three research-backed strategies that make habits easier to form.

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[Brain Health]: The Attitudes That Keep Your Mind Open and Brain Sharp, Episode 877 Jan 13, 2023

Today I’m talking about an overall approach to life that helps keep your mind open and your brain sharp, now and well into the future.

And that attitude is to be a lifelong learner.

A lot of people think they can do their beloved crossword or sudoku and keep their brains strong. But what I’ve been learning by working on a book with my last guest, Dr. Heather Sandison, is that doing what you’ve always done in terms of activities or hobbies isn’t enough to prevent to dementia. They are great, you can still do them, but unless you are in the moderate to severe stage of dementia, your brain really thrives on novelty. Come get heaps of ideas on how to keep your neuroplasticity humming–all by following your natural curiosity!

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[Brain Health]: Things to Do Now for Better Brain Health in the Future, Episode 876 Jan 11, 2023

Today I'm interviewing Dr. Heather Sandison, who is the founder of the Solcere medical clinic and the residential elder care facility in Marama in Southern California–the first memory care facility to have the goal of returning its residents to independent living.

Heather is working on a book where she details her evidence-based approach--full disclosure, I am helping her write that book and as we've been working on it I've gotten so excited by her stories of folks who have made incredible gains in their brain health that I had to have her on to share the things we can all do now that will help us have better brain health, memory, and cognition in the future. Wait til you hear the stories of her patients who have gotten better! You’ll want to do what they’re doing.

Marama at Home digital course

Solcere medical clinic website

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[Brain Health]: Surprising Brain Health Hacks that Work, Episode 875 Jan 09, 2023

A recent survey found that sixty-four percent of all Americans say that their biggest fear about growing older is that they will suffer from dementia. I share that fear!

So this week I’m diving into some evidence-based strategies you and I and everyone can implement to take great care of those beautiful brains of ours, so that it can take care of us now and well into the future. Today are three of the more surprising brain-health hacks I’ve discovered in my deep dive into the topic (I’m working on a book on reversing Alzheimer’s with Wednesday’s guest–suffice to say, the news on taking care of your cognition is really good!).

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[Midlife Reinvention]: Midlife Is Like Being a Teen Again–Why That’s a Good Thing, Ep 874 Jan 06, 2023

Remember how bewildering and awkward and silly puberty was?? Well, midlife is basically puberty in reverse. Huge hormonal shifts. The dawn of a new phase of life. A body you may or may not recognize. As the mother of a 14 year old daughter, I can see the similarities between us and you know what? A lot of it is awesome. Come find out why.

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[Midlife Reinvention]: Stop Waiting for an Empty Nest, Ep 873 Jan 04, 2023

Thinking about today’s episode the lyric from “Landslide” keep running through my head: “Children get older and I’m getting older too.” Whew! Deep.

Today I’m talking to Meagan Francis, host of the podcast Mother of Reinvention, mom of 5 kids (who range in age from 13 - 25), somewhat recently divorced, self-employed since she was 25 years old, and no stranger to pivoting. I asked Meagan about how motherhood–and women’s identities–change as kids get older, how to pick up the pieces when it feels like the chessboard of your life gets completely upended, and why you might not want to hold out for when the kids leave home to start reinventing yourself.

And just a little heads up: Today’s show is pretty geared to those among us who are parents, particularly mothers, but I believe that our conversation about identity shifts and making changes will relate to anyone.

Check out Mother of Reinvention (And subscribe! Rate! Review! Share!)

Visit Meagan’s website

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[Midlife Reinvention]: If You’re Feeling Meh at Midlife, Ep 872 Jan 02, 2023

I’ve been talking to friends and hearing from listeners that a lot of you are pondering life changes–maybe it’s because the kids are grown, or just because it’s time to switch things up. Or maybe your hand is being forced because you’re dealing with some kind of health thing. The common theme I’ve detected is that it’s happening at midlife.

It has also been a time that has been shown time and time again in research studies to be a time when we’re our least happy. Yep, there’s a U curve of happiness and midlife is the bottom of the U. That’s the bad news. The good news is…it goes up! But let’s talk about how to feel better about this naturally low point.

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[New Year’s Plan Jam!]: Here’s My New Year’s Planning Process (in All Its Glory!), Ep 871 Dec 30, 2022

Now that I’ve gotten to do a deep dive into everyone else’s planning process, I’m psyched to incorporate pieces from everyone’s approach into my own. I took last year off from planning–after the pandemic years, I just wasn’t in the mood, frankly. So this year, I’m feeling pumped and hope you are too. Today I’m sharing the details of what I’m doing, where and when, using what tools, and what I hope to get out of it.

Let’s do this, y’all.

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[New Year’s Plan Jam!]: Using Intention, Energy, and Love to Plan the New Year, Ep 870 Dec 29, 2022

I don’t know about you but I just love hearing how different people go about their New Year’s planning, and today’s guest offers a totally cool and different take on the process. I’m talking with Kimothy Joy, an artist, mentor, and author of a series of really cool guided journal/organizer hybrids called “Focus Pocus.” Kimothy’s process helps you bring your heart in to the process, first, and then your head can get on board to help figure out how to fulfill those higher desires.

It’s a totally different approach than my other guests have shared and I am here for it!

Sign up for Kimothy’s newsletter

Kimothy's Wheel of Intention

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[New Year’s Plan Jam!]: How a Professional Organizer Sets New Year’s Goals, Ep 869 Dec 28, 2022

The New Year’s Plan Jam keeps rolling today with my interview with Jessica Tudos, a professional organizer and life designer who helps people who are multi-passionate (raising my own hand here) take good care of all the parts of their lives and all the things they care about.

This is my second time interviewing Jessica (she came on to talk about life admin earlier in the year) and this time I get her to share the exact process she uses to make plans for the new year. She shares the 10 categories of life that she checks in on at this time of year, when she does her planning, where she does it, and the tools she uses (this is also the process she uses with her clients and plans to teach in a workshop in January, so if it appeals to you, visit her website at the link below!). Get ready to get your pens, planner and calendar out!

Sign up for Jessica’s Online Visioning Lab and plan 2023 in community!

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[New Year’s Plan Jam!]: A Doctor Shares How to Make Health Resolutions that Stick, Ep 868 Dec 27, 2022

Welcome to Day 2 of the first ever New Year’s Plan Jam. Today, I’m replaying an interview with Dr. Suzanne Steinbaum, a New York City cardiologist who specializes in helping women take care of their hearts (because, after all, heart disease is the number one killer of women–take that, breast cancer).

While not an interview on New Year’s planning per se, Dr. Steinbaum shares a TON of great information and inspiration for anyone who is feeling that it’s time to really focus on taking better care of their health–and maybe feeling a little overwhelmed and nervous about it. You will feel empowered, and like the changes you want to make are doable.

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[New Year’s Plan Jam!]: How a Planning Expert Prepares for the New Year, Ep 867 Dec 26, 2022

Welcome to the first ever New Year’s Plan Jam! This week, I’m interviewing four different types of experts and asking them to share their own personal New Year’s planning rituals and routines. (I’ll share my own on Friday, too.)

First up is Sarah Hart-Unger, host of the Best Laid Plans podcast (who was on the show earlier this fall during the week on planning–and who was a big hit). Sarah is a planning expert who generously shared how she goes about new year’s planning and goal-setting, what she factors in when she’s making those plans (including my favorite–energy), and the tools she uses. Talking to Sarah got me pumped to bust out my new planner and start dreaming and scheming and I feel confident it will have the same effect on you!

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[5 Minute Self-Care]: Feel Alive and Ward off Illness, Ep 866 Dec 23, 2022

You know how it can be so hard to wake up? Maybe it’s cold outside, you didn’t sleep great, you’ve got a lot of stuff to get done that day and you just don’t want to do it? But you drag yourself out of bed and get going but maybe never really shake off the sluggishness?

Today’s self-care can help you feel more alive and strengthen your immune system. It also helps you sleep better. In ONLY 30 SECONDS A DAY. This is my favorite kind of health hack–easy, fast, no cost, no commitment. All it really takes is willingness.

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[5 Minute Self-Care]: Feed Your Cells and Soothe the Soul, Ep 865 Dec 22, 2022

You know how your energy can conk out in the afternoon? And you start craving something to perk you back up, and maybe something to distract you and keep you going for another couple hours until the work day is through? Today’s quick self-care tip is delicious, restorative, feels like a treat, and is so so good for you and can get you in some really lovely brain waves.

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[5 Minute Self-Care]: Reset Your Nervous System, Ep 864 Dec 21, 2022

Your nervous system is an information super highway that dictates how stressed you feel, how well you’re sleeping and digesting, and whether you want to bite someone’s head off. Today I’ve got three easy ways for you to communicate with your nervous system and help it help you. No supplies needed.

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[5 Minute Self-Care]: Quiet Your Mind, Unkink Your Spine, Ep 863 Dec 20, 2022

When you’ve been sitting all day you feel it in your body–your neck and shoulders get tight, maybe you get a headache, you’re fatigued… blech. Today’s 5-minute self-care is something you can do that requires NO EFFORT and brings your body back into a better alignment that is also profoundly relaxing.

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Study on benefits of a natural view for post-surgery patients

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[5 Minute Self-Care]: Rest Your Eyes, Brain, and Spirit, Ep 862 Dec 19, 2022

During this holiday hullabaloo, when it may feel like time is at a premium, I’m focusing on sharing EASY, FAST, and MEGA-POWERFUL ways to show yourself some TLC.

First up is something that refreshes your eyes, brain, and spirit and has even been shown to help patients recovering from surgery get out of the hospital faster and be less crabby to their nurses. No, seriously.

Study on natural views reducing depressive symptoms during COVID lockdowns

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[Anxiety]: Your Return Ticket from Anxiety Land, Ep 861 Dec 16, 2022

Anxiety is often the result of living in the future--thinking about what hasn’t happened yet, perhaps even dreading it. Of course, it’s not bad to think about the future--you do want to give thought to where you’re headed and planning is generally a pretty handy skill to have–BUT, like anything else, it can become a habit. Living in the future can become pretty uncomfortable because your body can’t follow your brain there, and that disconnection can become unsettling.

Today I’m sharing how your body can help you come back into the present moment, where you can rest. It’s so so easy and feels so good.

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[Anxiety]: A Breath to Calm a Racing Mind, Ep 860 Dec 15, 2022

I’ve heard anxiety described as “excitement without breath,” Meaning, anxiety isn’t 100 percent bad. In fact, it’s often a sign that we are up to something big, or important.

In today’s episode, I’m sharing a breathing technique that brings breath into the picture and helps you get out of that locked-up, stressed-out, worried state. It’s easy, and we’ll do it together so that you’ll have the muscle memory you need to remember to do it next time anxiety strikes.

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[Anxiety]: What Living with Anxiety Has Taught Me , Ep 859 Dec 14, 2022

I’m re-airing an interview from December 2020 with Leigh Medeiros, a screenwriter and creativity coach who has lived with anxiety for over 30 years and is working on a memoir about how it’s affected her life.

You’ll hear some references to the height of the pandemic, but certainly, the things Leigh shares about understanding anxiety and learning to work with it skillfully still apply.

[Cut original intro by me, add in new intro by me, and then start this episode with: “Leigh is the author…”]

Leigh Medeiros’s website

The 1-Minute Writer, Leigh’s book

@Leigh_Medeiros, Leigh on Instagram

@Leigh_Medeiros_, Leigh on Twitter

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[Anxiety] A Trick to Contain Those Anxious Thoughts, Ep 857 Dec 13, 2022

You could spend most of the day and night worrying–and how unproductive and unpleasant is that?

Today I’m sharing how to put up some boundaries around your attention so that you set aside specific time and space for worrying–a technique I learned about from a 9-year-old.

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[Anxiety] Trust Is an Antidote to Worry, Ep 857 Dec 12, 2022

This week I’m talking about anxiety. I mean, mid-December–‘tis the season, isn’t it? Lots to do, lots of expectations to manage, lots of opportunities to feel like your experience doesn’t match the cultural narrative of how the holidays are ‘supposed’ to be.

Sometimes anxiety is absolutely appropriate. But many times it isn’t a match for whatever it is you’re facing–it’s like using a chef’s knife to butter your bread, something I actually tried to do this morning because i didn’t want to dirty another knife and I can confirm, it was overkill. So let’s dive in to some ways to work with it. Today’s tool is trust.

I’m sharing 4 affirmations to help you access trust even when you’re feeling anxious:

I trust myself to do my part.

I trust life to do its part.

If things ever feel like too much, I trust myself to ask for help.

I trust that things are working out for the greater good.

This episode sponsored by:

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[Mindset Hacks] How Do I Stay in My Own Lane?, Ep 856 Dec 09, 2022

This week I’ve been sharing new ways of thinking that can help you stay in a more positive place. And today I wanted to answer a listener question that relates to this idea, and offers a mindset hack to help.

Camille from Canada writes, “Lately I’ve realized that I spend a lot of time–too much time–and energy on worrying about other people. I love being a good friend and family member to others, but I’ve been feeling really frazzled lately, and like I’m not paying enough attention to my own life and needs. Does it make me a bad person if I want to do less for the people I care about? How do I stick to my own lane?”

Relevant How to Be a Better Person episodes:

Validate, Validate, Validate

Listen Better

Relevant Tara Brach episodes:

Beyond the Controlling Self, Part 1

Beyond the Controlling Self, Part 2

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[Mindset Hacks] Try on a New Inner Voice, Ep 855 Dec 08, 2022

I’m guessing that the voice you use to talk to yourself isn’t currently all that friendly or supportive. So today’s mindset hack is to try on a new inner voice. (My current fave? Dolly Parton! Or, my dog, if she could speak English).

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Mindset Hacks] How to Stop Judging Other People (and Yourself), Ep 854 Dec 07, 2022

A mode of thinking that can really keep us stuck in that place of feeling upset and down and small-minded is judgment, whether we’re judging other people, or judging ourselves.

So today I’m replaying an interview from 2020 that breaks down what judgment is, and how we can understand where it comes from so that we can work with it more skillfully. Here goes!

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[Mindset Hacks] There’s More Where That Came From, Ep 853 Dec 06, 2022

How many times have you beaten yourself up for spending money or time on something that didn’t end up panning out? It’s easy to do, because we tend to think of time and money as zero sum games--once they’re gone, they’re gone, and they’re never coming back. Which is not actually true. So let’s break up the shame cycle that is all too often built into spending both money and time with a quick mindset adjustment.

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[Mindset Hacks] Look for the Loving Reason, Ep 852 Dec 05, 2022

In this busy holiday month, I’m coming to you with some mindset hacks–little pivots in your thinking that can help things feel a lot less stressful and give you more energy and resilience at any time of year.

Today’s mindset hack is to start training yourself to look for the loving reason why something has happened. When I say loving reason, I mean an explanation that suggests that things are working out the way they are because of a beneficial reason, even when it might seem like they’re falling apart.

I’m basically asking you to try on the idea that life is happening for you instead of to you. Let’s do this!

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[Generosity] When It’s OK to NOT Be Generous, Ep 851 Dec 02, 2022

You can be generous in some ways, and stingy in others. And it’s really fascinating to start to unpack where you are a natural giver, and where you might be more likely to freeze up and think, oh heck no.

Maybe those are areas that you can think about differently and find your way to feeling more generous; but maybe those are just things that don’t suit you for some reason, and you can focus on other ways to be more giving without feeling bad that you’re secretly a Scrooge.

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[Generosity] How to Give Without Depleting Yourself, Ep 850 Dec 01, 2022

While giving is often energizing, there are definitely times when it’s draining. Or even upsetting. It can leave you feeling taken advantage of, or unappreciated. And that doesn’t feel good.

In addition, sometimes *your* giving can make the person you’re trying to give to feel bad--micromanaged, or like you think they aren’t capable.

So today, let’s figure out how to keep giving in the realm of feeling good.

This episode sponsored by:

Damon’s Bring Your Worth YouTube show

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[Generosity] The Value–and Costs–of Emotional Labor, Ep 849 Nov 30, 2022

We think about giving to others in very practical ways, but there are ways that you can give to people emotionally, too. And some of them feel good. But others, really don’t. Today I talk with Damon Brown, a coach for non-traditional entrepreneurs who does a lot of emotional support in his line of work, as well as a multi-time author (links to his book just below), about how to value the emotional labor you do for others, and how to discern when maybe that’s not your work to do.

Damon’s website

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[Generosity] The Many Ways You Have to Give, Ep 848 Nov 29, 2022

If you’ve ever had the thought that you could stand to be a more generous person, I hope today’s episode will show you that there are SO many ways to be giving–well beyond giving money or time–and that something you hear today will get you into the higher energy state of seeking to be of service to others.

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[Generosity] Why Giving to Others Is Good for You, Ep 847 Nov 28, 2022

When you think of what being a better person means, I’m guessing that being generous is one of the first things that pops to mind. BUT, that’s not to say that we have to be 100% selfless, or always put others first, or give until it hurts. So, how do we find that balance?

Let’s start by looking at the benefits of being generous–not for the other person, but for you. In today’s episode I’m sharing some cool research findings on the physical, mental, and emotional benefits of giving.

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[Thanksgiving] You’ll Thank Yourself Later for Listening to This, Ep 846 Nov 25, 2022

You already know that gratitude is a nice way to appreciate something that has already happened, but did you know that gratitude can also help you create the future you want?

Well…it can!

Today I’m sharing how to thank yourself for doing something that you haven’t done yet. It sounds a little weird, I get it, but basically, it’s about thinking how much your future self will appreciate the things that you do now, in the present. It’s a cool way to get your butt into gear on doing something that feels hard, scary, or unappealing today.

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[Thanksgiving], The Power of Saying Your Thanks Out Loud Ep 845 Nov 24, 2022

We all know gratitude is good for you–we’ve heard the advice to keep a gratitude journal, and I’ve talked before about reminding yourself of all the things you’re grateful for while you’re lying in bed at night. But there’s something really powerful about actually expressing your thanks outloud. Since it’s Thanksgiving here in the U.S. today, today is a great day to take this idea for a test drive.

I’ve got some research to share on the power of telling someone else what you’re grateful for, but first, I’m going to start with a couple of little examples that show you what I mean.

Something we have done in our family at Thanksgiving is to go around the table and everyone names one thing that they’re grateful for. You know, it’s not a speech or a big to-do, you’re just naming something, and you can always say something obvious like family or food and there’s absolutely no shame in that. BUT some very meaningful and memorable moments have come out of that exercise.

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Here’s a link to a full transcript of today’s episode.

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[Thanksgiving] Gratitude for Lazy People Ep 844 Nov 23, 2022

Hi friends. Today I’m replaying an interview from Thanksgiving, 2020 with Polly Campbell about how to practice gratitude even if you’re really busy and lazy and frankly don’t want to be bothered. We’re in a different place than we were in 2020, thankfully, but her advice is still as true as ever. I hope it helps you get in the grateful spirit.

Polly’s podcast, Simply Said

Polly’s website

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[Thanksgiving] Stress Buster #2: Rehearse Happiness, Ep 843 Nov 22, 2022

Yesterday I talked about something you can do in the moment of feeling stressed out during a family gathering that will help you not get your feathers ruffled or your peace disturbed.

Today, I’m sharing a stress buster that you can do in advance that will help you stay in a groovy space the day of.

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[Thanksgiving] Stress Buster #1: Counteract Your Irritation, Ep 842 Nov 21, 2022

Here’s the thing about family: You love them, and they can drive you crazy. Which makes you react in a way that you wish you hadn’t, and then you feel guilty. It can be a real merry-go-round of unpleasant feelings.

And when faced with those unpleasant feelings at a gathering where there is plenty of food and probably alcohol, it may be tempting to try to stuff them down with another piece of pie or glass of Scotch or wine or whatever your family beverage is which might help you forget your upset for a few minutes but then you feel disgustingly stuffed or hungover and ultimately just feel worse.

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[More Quick Hits]: Catch Someone in the Act of Doing Good, Ep 841 Nov 18, 2022

You’ve heard me say it before and you’ll hear me say it again, what you focus on grows. If you want more positive behavior, notice it. Call attention to it. We all love to be acknowledged for our efforts to do the decent thing. As a bonus, recognizing someone else doing something good helps you feel better, too.

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[More Quick Hits]: Validate, Validate, Validate Ep 840 Nov 17, 2022

Have you ever been telling someone how you feel about something, and they told you to just calm down? Or that you’re over-reacting? Or that you shouldn’t feel that way? It didn’t feel good, right?

Today I’m sharing the opposite of that approach–aka, validating–aka, how to help the people you talk to feel seen, heard, and understood. Once you get the hang of this, it’s so fun, because you know what to do to truly help someone feel better.

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[More Quick Hits]: Bringing Decency Back Ep 839 Nov 16, 2022

Today I’m interviewing Colleen Doyle Bryant, author of Rooted in Decency: Finding Inner Peace in a World Gone Sideways because, I mean… a) we need it and b) if that doesn’t fit the theme of being a better person, honestly, I don’t know what does!

I asked Colleen, what decency even is, why it feels like it’s on the decline, and what kinds of things each of us can do as individuals to help bring back a culture of respect.

She told me about how we all need a “Check Accuracy” light on our mental dashboard, and the power of a tiny little pause to help us connect instead of get disgusted (she also told me why it can feel like someone who sees things differently than you can make you want to squinch up your nose and turn your head away, as if you had just smelled something gross).

I learned a lot and you will too when you give us a listen!

Follow Colleen on Instagram

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[More Quick Hits]; Force Yourself to Look for the Good Ep 838 Nov 15, 2022

There’s no denying: There are a lot of bummers in the world. You could really spend all day, all week, maybe even your whole life just dwelling on them. While it’s true that bummers exist, it’s not the whole story. There are also plenty of beautiful, uplifting, heartwarming things in the world.

Lately I got a reminder that it’s on us to actively seek out the positive, and so now I’m passing that reminder on to you. Prepare to feel better!

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[More Quick Hits]: Decreasing Negativity, Ep 837 Nov 14, 2022

It’s a busy time of year so I’m bringing you a few more quick hits–simple, easy, quick things you can do to make the world a better place and to boost your own feelings of being a decent human.

When it comes to making a difference in yourself and the world, there are two ways basic ways to approach it: increase the positive, or decrease the negative. Today’s episode is about the second half of that equation.

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[Life Admin]: You’ll Never Get It All Done, and That’s OK, Ep 836 Nov 11, 2022

Today’s big idea is that there is a balance that you’ve got to strike in order to improve your relationship to life admin.

And that is to make peace with the fact that while the human brain loves to close open loops–and cross things off the to-do list–it’s also true that there will always, always be more to do on the adulting front. So you can't let your peace of mind depend on how many things are left on your to-do list. Here's some insight on to how to make peace between doing, and never being done.

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[Life Admin]: 3 Mindest Hacks to Make Adulting Less Overwhelming, Ep. 835 Nov 10, 2022

Today’s big idea is actually three ideas for making life admin less overwhelming. These are mindset shifts that will help you think about adulting differently--a key step in making it all feel a little less relentless.

Contribute your tips and successes to the Life Admin Tipsheet!

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[Life Admin]: Life Admin Secrets from a Professional Organizer, Ep 834 Nov 09, 2022

Frankly, life admin just makes me want to lie down. Which is why I’m excited to be interviewing my friend, Jessica Tudos, a mindful organizer based in Toronto whom I always love talking to about how to get a grip on the many facets of life while still respecting things like creativity and being moved by inspiration and having a lot of things going on because you’re genuinely interested in a lot of things–something Jessica calls being multi-passionate. In today's episode, Jessica dishes up how she keeps all the details of life contained, and how you can do it, too, in a way that suits your personality and your life. I learned a ton!

Contribute your tips and successes to the Life Admin Tipsheet!

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[Life Admin]: Never Forget to Make an Appointment Again, Ep 833 Nov 08, 2022

Scheduling is one of my VERY LEAST favorite life admin tasks. Am I the only one with an allergy to planning for something that's not related to having fun? Today’s big idea is my very best tip to make sure that you have the majority of the appointments that you, your pet, and your family needs with next to no effort on your part.

Contribute your tips and successes to the Life Admin Tipsheet!

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[Life Admin]: How to Not Let “Adulting” Take Over Your Life, Ep. 832 Nov 07, 2022

This week on the podcast I’m talking about how to take better care of all the details of life–making appointments, paying bills, prepping your taxes, keeping your paperwork up to date, your car maintained, your communication handled, etc., etc., etc. In other words, I’m talking about adulting. And when I went to research this topic I realized it had a very technical sounding name: life admin.

Which simultaneously made me feel a mixture of grief and relief--a simultaneous feeling of, no wonder I’ve been feeling the way that I have, and, dang, I guess this is really a thing that must be reckoned with. Let's do it, together.

Contribute your tips and successes to the Life Admin Tipsheet!

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[Thinking Straight]: 3 Options for Talking Through Your Challenges, Ep. 831 Nov 04, 2022

There’s just something about how you say stuff to another person that can come straight off the truth, like a wind that comes down a mountain. You’re not overthinking, you’re just talking and boom, there it is.

Sometimes honestly I don’t really know what I think about something until I talk to someone about it. I’m a big believer in verbal processing.

Today I’m sharing 3 ways to get your verbal processing fix–one free, two that you pay for. For those times you need help thinking clearly, you’ve always got these three tools at your disposal!

THERAPY

Zencare website

Psychology Today’s Therapist Finder

COACHES

Melody Wilding’s website (executive coaching)

Andrea J. Lee’s website (life and business coaching)

Brittany Drozd’s website (small business and leadership coaching)

My website (although you can email me at kate@katehanley.com or DM me on IG @katehanleyauthor)

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My interview with Andrea about breaking the cycle of anger

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[Thinking Straight]: 2 Clarifying Questions to Ask Yourself, Ep. 830 Nov 03, 2022

When you can tell that you’re not thinking clearly about something it can be so frustrating! So you just try to think harder and that really doesn’t get you anywhere.

Here’s what I’ve learned–it’s not trying to think the same thing, just harder, that helps you think more clearly. It’s thinking differently. Which…how do you do that exactly?

I’ve got 2 questions to ask yourself that help you do just that.

My interview with Andrea about separating moral outrage from personal outrage

Andrea J Lee’s website

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Melody’s book, Trust Yourself

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[Thinking Straight]: How to Stop Overthinking, Ep. 829 Nov 02, 2022

Have you ever been so focused on thinking about something clearly that you ended up completely overthinking it?

Yeah, me too.

Today I’m re-playing an interview with Melody Wilding, a licensed social worker, an executive coach and author of Trust Yourself: Stop Overthinking and Channel Your Emotions for Success at Work. Although this interview originally aired in October, 2021, Melody’s insights offer a lot of context for why you may tend to overthink in the first place as well as some strategies for how to get out of the overthinking loop.

I particularly loved what she shared about the upsides of the predisposition that makes you more prone to overthinking. I hope you enjoy it!

Melody’s website

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[Thinking Straight]: A Morning Ritual to Clear Your Head, Ep. 828 Nov 01, 2022

Sometimes there’s just so much stuff rattling around inside your head that it’s hard to sit with one thought. Today I’m sharing the morning ritual I’ve been doing that has helped me extract all that noise from my brain and put it somewhere where a) I don’t have to think about it anymore and b) get some objectivity on those thoughts.

It’s part of a week of episodes dedicated to thinking straight–something that can feel really hard when life is moving a million miles an hour.

This practice comes from the classic self-help book, The Artist’s Way by Julia Cameron. Grab a notebook and a pencil!

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Harvard Business Review article on why to stop doing low-value work

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[Thinking Straight]: Make a “No” List, Ep. 827 Oct 31, 2022

I bet you’ve got a pretty good grasp on your to-do list–it’s probably on some kind of endless loop in your mind. But have you given any thought to what’s on your to-don’t list? This is what helps your brain find rest, and balance that constant focus on what you’ve got to get done. And it’s what we’re talking about today, as part of a week of episodes on thinking straight.

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[Aging Happily]: 3 Major Benefits (Yes!) of Aging, Ep. 826 Oct 28, 2022

We have to actively try to counter the ideas about aging that we’ve been swimming in for years and years in order to truly get on board with the idea that getting older is something to not just make peace with, but also to actively celebrate.

To help you do that, I’m sharing 3 major, huge, fricking fantastic benefits of getting older. It’s time to get pumped!

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[Aging Happily]: A Hack for More–and More Fulfilling–Friendships, Ep. 825 Oct 27, 2022

This week I’m taking a look at how we can all feel happier and more at peace with the fundamental truth–and privilege–that so long as we are living, we get a little older each day.

For today’s episode, I’ve got two words for you: intergenerational friendships.

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[Aging Happily]: This Just In: Aging Doesn’t Suck!, Ep. 824 Oct 26, 2022

This week on the podcast I'm taking a look at aging, and the simple but powerful things we can do to make our getting older experience better on many levels. And today I'm talking with someone who is a leading voice for women to re-think their attitudes toward aging, and to embrace some new tools and strategies to make aging just a new phase of life--and not something to dread.

My guest today is Tamsen Fadal–as the evening news anchor for WPIX-11 in New York City (who recently turned 51), Tamsen has spent her entire career being told that at any moment, she would age out of her job. Now, at 51, she’s going stronger than ever, and has a lot to say on exceeding expectations (others’ and our own) as you get older. Plus, she is (and looks) amazing, so I get her to spill the things she does to keep herself in a good space as she constantly keeps her eye on what’s Coming Up Next (the name of her podcast).

Listen to Tamsen’s Coming Up Next podcast

Follow Tamsen on Instagram

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[Aging Happily]: The Good News About Self-Confidence as We Age, Ep. 823 Oct 25, 2022

Here’s what we tend to think of when we think of getting older: a downhill slide. When there are plenty of good things that are actually getting better–including self-confidence and happiness. In this episode, I share the research and the good news.

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[Aging Happily]: The Amazing Power of Getting Pumped About Growing Older, Ep. 822 Oct 24, 2022

When you think about getting older, or the elderly in general, what words come to mind?

The answer to that question can have a big impact on your health–from how long you live to how high your risk of developing dementia is (even if it runs in your family!).

I’m sharing some fabulous news about getting older all this week on the podcast. This is stuff that was pretty new information for me so I hope that it will be a pleasant surprise for you too (and that it might even help you live longer and better, which research suggests it could!).

New York Times article on Dr. Levy’s research

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[Simplify]: How Can I Stop Spinning My Wheels?, Ep. 821 Oct 21, 2022

Ever felt like you’re running as fast as you can, but you’re still not getting anywhere?

That’s how a listener named Nicole was feeling. She wrote in with a question. Here’s what she said.

“At the end of every day I feel like even though I was busy all day, I didn’t do anything that’s getting me any closer to my goals. After going to meetings, running errands, making dinner, walking the dog, answering emails–I’m wiped out but don’t feel like I really have any progress to show for my efforts. Sometimes I find myself wondering, how do I stop spinning my wheels?”

I talk Nicole through a little audit where you answer 8 questions about what’s going on in your life right now. Those questions are:

What am I enjoying the most right now?
What am I enjoying the least?
What feels really gratifying right now?
What feels like a waste of energy?
When I think about my life over the next year or so, what excites me?
When I think about life over the next year or so, what weighs me down?
Is there something I need to keep in mind about this particular point in time?
Is there something that would really help at this particular point in time?

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[Simplify]: An Exercise for Setting Better Priorities, Ep. 820 Oct 20, 2022

You know a great way to simplify your life? By being crystal clear on your priorities. Because if you aren’t sure what your top priorities are, you’re going to get your attention hijacked by all kinds of stuff that doesn’t really matter. Which is fine, you don’t need to be a robot that is completely focused on important things all the time. BUT, if you don’t know what your priorities are, well, you’re not all that likely to be making steady progress on the things that matter to you.

TODAY I’m sharing a priority-making matrix tool that I use and have shared with coaching clients for years that always helps me sift through the many things on my to-do list and floating through my brain.

Download the Priority-Making Matrix here!

This episode sponsored by:

Scarlett’s book Stop Stressing About Dressing

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[Simplify]: How to Get Dressed with Less Stress, Ep. 819 Oct 19, 2022

Clothes can make you feel like a million bucks, or totally like yourself and at ease. But a lot of times, trying to figure out what to put on your body so you can go about living your life is any number of negative things–complicated, frustrating, embarrassing, or stressful. I have certainly felt all those ways when trying to get dressed, or worse, when I’m out and about and really wishing I were wearing something else.

Today I’m interviewing Scarlett DeBease, a personal stylist I met when I attended a group photoshoot. I admit I was a little intimidated when I met her because she was so well put together–but she’s just as funny and down to earth and sweet as she can be. I picked her brain at that day-long shoot and then last week, I invited her on to the podcast so I could hit record and share her insights with you.

Scarlett’s videos on Ending Your Closet Shame

Follow Scarlett on Instagram

Support this podcast by buying “I Give a Shit” and “Be Kind” mugs, tees, hoodies, totebags and more!

This episode sponsored by:

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[Simplify]: Remember What’s Worked in the Past, Ep. 818 Oct 18, 2022

Today I’m talking about a powerful way to simplify during a time when you’re feeling overwhelmed.

Whenever you’re facing a challenge, it’s really common to think, I have to figure out an all-new strategy! I need to start doing this new thing! And thinking in this new way! And figure out things that I’ve never figured out before!

When really, you’ve probably been in a similar situation before, and there were things you did then that helped. This is one of the benefits of being an adult. For many things that you experience, it’s no longer your first rodeo. So before you go knocking yourself out to figure out what new skills or approaches you need, spend a little time thinking about what’s helped you in the past. It’s how you learn from your own experiences. Kinda like self-mentorship!

This episode sponsored by:

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[Simplify]: Take It One Change at a Time, Ep. 817 Oct 17, 2022

I’m devoting this week of episodes to simplifying. I mean, life is complicated enough. To be clear, it’s not like you can engineer all complexity out of your life. But there are ways you can make things more simple and give yourself a little extra space to think.

When you’re at a point where the idea of simplifying is sounding good to you, it’s tempting to want to change a bunch of things–cancel plans, maybe declutter a closet or two, extricate yourself from some commitments, and maybe try to add in some basic self-care things.

It’s all good stuff to do, no question. BUT, if you try to do all those things at once, or within a tight span of time, it gets to be a LOT. Here’s how to keep it simple. Or at least, simpler.

This episode sponsored by:

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Friday, October 14, [Being There for Others]: Before You Try To Help Someone, Remember This, Ep. 816 Oct 14, 2022

Wanting to help someone who’s in need of support IS honorable. But what it ISN’T, is about you. You are not the solution for their problems, nor is it your responsibility to solve their problems for them.

I think this is another reason why we sometimes resist reaching out to someone in need of help–we fear that we won’t actually be able to help, or that we might get overwhelmed by the amount of help they need.

I share a helpful analogy that can help get your head on straight about what your ultimate goal is.

This episode sponsored by:

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Thursday, October 13, [Being There for Others]: Signs Someone Might Be Struggling, Ep. 815 Oct 13, 2022

One of the beneficial roles we can play as someone’s friend or loved one is to notice them. Not judge them, or rate their appearance, but just take in their presence.

In this episode, I’ll share some common signs that someone might be having a hard time with life.

This episode sponsored by:

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Wednesday, October 12, [Being There for Others]: How to Truly Help a Sick Person, Ep. 814 Oct 12, 2022

Today on the podcast I interview Jen Singer, a writer friend of mine who has survived cancer, Covid, and heart failure and who now writes books aimed at helping people–both those who have just been diagnosed, and the people who love them–deal with big, scary, illnesses.

In this episode, Jen shares the things we tend to say to sick people that really aren’t that helpful, shares some ideas of what to say that actually help, and offers great ideas for how to really show up for people who are going through a health scare.

Check out Jen’s Just Diagnosed Guides

Follow Jen on Instagram

This episode sponsored by:

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Tuesday, October 11, [Being There for Others]: 3 Helpful Questions to Ask, Ep. 813 Oct 11, 2022

Here are three questions you can keep in your back pocket that will make it super easy to check in with someone. This way, you won’t be at a loss for words–which is a big reason why we may be tempted to stay away when someone we know or love is going through something hard. I know you don’t want to say the wrong thing--so say these things instead.

This episode sponsored by:

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[Being There for Others]: The Surprising Power of Bearing Witness, Ep. 812 Oct 10, 2022

This week on the podcast I’m replaying episodes that talk about how to be there for the folks in your life who are going through it–whatever it may be. The blues, anxiety, stress, illness, family stuff are all normal parts of life and we all get by with a little help from our friends (or family members, or neighbors). But just because it takes a village, it doesn’t mean that we automatically know how to be a helpful village person!

Today’s big idea is that when someone you know and maybe love is facing something tough, it’s easy to want to help, but not so easy to know HOW to do that, exactly. Let's talk about the very most important--and powerful--thing you can do, that doesn’t even require you to say a thing.

This episode sponsored by:

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[Quick Hits]: Assume Positive Intent, Ep. 811 Oct 07, 2022

You may not think that you’re making negative assumptions about other people–after all, most of us know that to assume makes an “ass” out of “u” and “me. But, trust me, your brain is filling in a lot of blanks about the people you encounter every day, and probably in a fairly ungenerous and judgmental way.

Today's quick-hit helps with that. It’s a mantra I remind myself of again and again and again. It always helps.

This episode sponsored by:

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[Quick Hits]: Say Thank You for Something You Normally Wouldn’t, Ep. 810 Oct 06, 2022

Saying thank you is about more than being polite--it's about training yourself to look for the good, even in situations that are otherwise neutral or even negative. It helps you re-wire your brain, which is trained to look for and remember the bad. So–what kinds of unusual stuff can you muster up some gratitude for today?

This episode sponsored by:

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[Quick Hits]: Ask Someone How They’re Really Doing, Ep. 809 Oct 05, 2022

You probably say the words “how are you?” a few times a day without thinking much about it. But if you put just a little more oomph in to that question, you create a really cool and powerful opportunity to connect with another human–and that really helps you feel like a better person.

Come get all the guidance you need to have a moment that fills both your cups.

This episode sponsored by:

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[Quick Hits]: Let Someone Else Go First, Ep. 808 Oct 04, 2022

When you’re in a hurry it’s easy to wish everyone would just get out of your way already. It’s a real “me first” state of mind: “Please step to the side so that I may get to my very important destination!”

Today's quick hit can help you pull yourself out of that subconscious way of thinking, and potentially even make someone else's day (which feels just as good to you as it does to them).

This episode sponsored by:

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[Quick Hits]: Look Someone in the Eye, Ep. 807 Oct 03, 2022

This podcast recently celebrated its third birthday and passed a million downloads!!

Whoop whoop!!

We’ve also gained a lot of new listeners over the last couple of weeks, so this week I’m taking it back to basics and re-sharing episodes that offer one quick, practical, and impactful thing to do to help you feel like a better person who is making the world a better place.

Today’s quick hit is to look people in the eye. This may seem like no big deal, or like it doesn’t have anything to do with being a better person, but listen in for how much it matters.

This episode sponsored by:

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[Current Obsessions]: The Woo-Woo Version of a Magic Eight Ball, Ep. 806 Sep 30, 2022

Do you ever wish you could get a clear sign of the universe about what you should do in a certain situation? The current obsession I’m sharing with you today helps you do just that. Which is why I’m obsessed with it.

What’s your current obsession?? Come share it on the aptly-named Running List of Current Obsessions Google sheet!

This episode sponsored by:

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[Current Obsessions]: The Household Appliance that Makes Cleaning Fun, Ep. 805 Sep 29, 2022

It’s come to this, I’m afraid. I’m currently obsessed with a household appliance. A vacuum cleaner, to be exact. But I have never vacuumed so much in my life, and certainly never had fun while I was doing it. Come hear what happened when I showed it to my mom.

What’s your current obsession?? Come share it on the aptly-named Running List of Current Obsessions Google sheet!

This episode sponsored by:

WOZtvfes9wXe35WouoDn

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[Current Obsessions]: The Goodwill Find That Makes the Perfect Morning Beverage, Ep. 804 Sep 28, 2022

Why is it that your first cup of coffee or tea is so perfect that you want another one, but the second one is never as good?

I’m a tea drinker and I was plagued by trying to find a way to have the right amount of tea at the right strength and temperature. I mean, it’s the little things, right? And then I took my thrift-loving daughter to Goodwill one day and occupied myself by lookin at the household items aisle. And that’s when I saw them. One of my current obsessions – a big ass mug.

With a bonus beverage I’m also currently telling everyone I know about–a low-carb beer alternative.

What’s your current obsession?? Come share it on the aptly-named Running List of Current Obsessions Google sheet!

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[Current Obsessions]: What’s Helping Me Sleep, Ep. 803 Sep 27, 2022

Are you always on the lookout for things that will help you sleep more–especially ones that don’t require a prescription, aren’t habit forming, and don’t make you wake up feeling groggy? Me too. And I recently found one that works so well, I’m completely obsessed with it. (Hint: It’s a supplement, but it’s not a pill!)

What’s your current obsession?? Come share it on the aptly-named Running List of Current Obsessions Google sheet!

This episode sponsored by:

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[Current Obsessions]: The Streaming Show That’s Giving Me Life, Ep. 802 Sep 26, 2022

This week, I’m doing something new–sharing the handful of things right now that I am loving so much that I find myself talking about them with friends and family. So I figured, why not share them with you, too?

Today’s current obsession is a show–but it’s not any show. It’s a show that models body acceptance and celebrates bodies of all sizes. I’ve been watching it with my daughter and I can feel it helping both of us love our bodies more. I mean, not bad for a little Amazon Prime and chill, right?

What’s your current obsession?? Come share it on the aptly-named Running List of Current Obsessions Google sheet!

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[Time]: How Can I Stop Frittering Away a Whole Day?, Ep. 801 Sep 23, 2022

We’ve all been there–we had the whole day open to do as we pleased, and we had all these things we wanted to get done, but by the time 5 oclock rolls around, we haven’t done squat.

Today’s episode is about how to avoid frittering away the day.

And today’s episode is inspired by a listener question. Hooray!

If you have a question or quandary you’d like me to address on a future episode, email me at kate@katehanley.com. Bonus points for recording a voice memo and attaching it to your email (we can totally keep you anonymous if you like).

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[Time]: Weed Out Annoying Time Sucks, Ep. 800 Sep 22, 2022

The dumb little things you have to do repeatedly can eat up your time and drag your energy down. Since this week is all about ways to take better care of the intersection of time, energy, and happiness, finding solutions for these minor aggravations is the subject of today’s episode.

I don’t know about you, but I find teeny little changes ridiculously exciting, which means I’m ridiculously excited about this episode.

This episode sponsored by:

Dr. Holmes’s book, Happier Hour

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[Time]: Make Time for Happiness, Ep. 799 Sep 21, 2022

Today I’m talking with Dr. Cassie Holmes, professor at UCLA’s Anderson School of Management, social psychologist who researches the intersection of time and happiness, and who teaches a wildly popular MBA class on how to change the way you think about time in order to boost happiness. She generously shares her evidence-based strategies for changing your approach to time and making more space for the things that really matter to you. I love this episode!!

Time tracking sheet

Time crafting canvas

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[Time]: Switch Your Squeeze, Ep. 798 Sep 20, 2022

When you’re cracking open your planner, or opening up your digital calendar (I use both)--here’s what we tend to do: put in the things we have to do first. Things like commute, work, have this meeting or this appointment. And then we try to squeeze in everything else around it–things like, do something with friends, exercise, read, do our hobbies. All those things make us who we are and add enjoyment to our days and richness to our lives.

I say, let’s switch that whole approach around. Make space for the things you WANT to do, FIRST, and then squeeze in all the things you have to do around it.

It’s the equivalent of the financial advice to pay yourself first–take the time you need for yourself right off the top, and then everything else will sort itself into the spaces that are left.

This episode sponsored by:

The Harvard Business Review article that describes the Energy Project study I mention in this episode

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[Time]: Manage Your Energy, Not Your Time, Ep. 797 Sep 19, 2022

Time isn’t just this tangible thing that you can parcel out and have it behave in predictable ways. So let’s stop trying to make it our b-i-t-c-h, whaddya say?

The thing is, when you are feeling good and in a groove, mentally, physically, and spiritually, you cut through tasks like a hot knife through butter. It’s better, then, to stop trying to manage your time, and focus instead of managing your energy.

This is not just some woo-woo thing that I personally believe.

For more episodes on raising your energy, scroll back to March and look for the “tending your energy” tag in the episode titles. There’s good stuff there!

This episode sponsored by:

1 in 4 Americans who work in the private sector get NO paid time off

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[Planning]: A Planning Hack for More Happiness, Ep. 796 Sep 16, 2022

A big reason we make plans is to stave off stress–if you know what’s happening when, it gives you a feeling of control and helps you know that you’re doing the things that you need and want to do.

And there’s a certain type of planning can also make you significantly happier, and not the kind of satisfaction that comes from having all your ducks in a row, but actual happiness that recharges your creativity, helps you be in the moment, and creates memories that can last a lifetime.

What is this magical planning hack?

Plan. More. Vacations!!

Research quoted in this episode:

700 million vacation days go unused each year

Vacations really do help us feel less tired and more mindful

People are more engaged and productive at work after taking a vacation

Survey that found that taking time off reduces reports of depression

That vacation feeling only lasts about 2 weeks

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[Planning]: When Plans Change, Ep. 795 Sep 15, 2022

If planning is so great–and because I’m devoting a week of episodes to it, I think it’s clear that I do believe in the power of planning–what do you do when plans change? Does that mean all your effort is wasted?

That’s what we’re talking about today. (I think we can all relate to dashed plans now that we’re in a post-COVID world.)

This episode sponsored by:

Best of Both Worlds podcast

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[Planning]: Time for Everything: Secrets of a Planning Expert, Ep. 794 Sep 14, 2022

Today, I'm interviewing planning expert Sarah Hart-Unger, host of the Best Laid Plans podcast. A self-described "compulsive list maker and life planner," Sarah's planning prowess has been honed through experience. In addition to Best Laid Plans, Sarah is also the co-host of the Best of Both Worlds podcast, with Laura Vanderkam; is a pediatric endocrinologist; has three kids; and is a daily blogger and a devoted runner.

In this interview, Sarah shares how she makes time for planning, her systems for sharing plans with her family, her favorite planning tools, and the mindset she brings to planning in the first place (which was way different from how I had been approaching it).

Best Laid Plans podcast

Sarah’s website

This episode sponsored by:

Relevant blog post: Plan for No Plans

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[Planning]: Why You Should Plan for No Plans, Ep. 793 Sep 13, 2022

As great as planning is, it’s important to give yourself the space of having no plans on a regular basis.

John Lennon said life is what happens when you’re busy making other plans–planning for no plans means you’re just giving yourself some space for life to unfold without totally derailing what you had planned. (Plus, what NOT to do during this unplanned time.)

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[Planning]: How to Plan for Time to Think, Ep. 792 Sep 12, 2022

This week I’m sharing ways to make planning less stressful and more happy-making.

Today’s big idea is that there’s a type of planning that most of us don’t even think to make room for on our calendars, but that can help us do our best thinking and ensure that we pay good attention to the things that matter most (and that tend to get drowned out in a typical day). It’s called the Shultz Hour–listen to the episode for all the details!

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[Sleep]: Natural Ways to Get Back to Sleep, Ep. 791 Sep 09, 2022

Insomnia tends to follow two basic patterns–difficulty getting to sleep, and difficulty staying asleep. Today’s episode is for the folks in the second camp, who wake up in the middle of the night and have a hard time getting back to sleep.

I have several strategies to share that you can use to help you get the rest of your z’s.

This episode sponsored by:

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[Sleep]: Good News for Those Who Wake Up in the Middle of the Night, Ep. 790 Sep 08, 2022

Today’s episode is for anyone who’s insomnia style of choice is to wake up in the middle of the night and have problems getting back to sleep.

I have really interesting and, ultimately, good news for you. Humans have only been sleeping straight through the night as a matter of general practice since the Industrial Revolution. Before that, it was customary to be up for an hour or so in the middle of the night. So if this happens to you, you’re not a failure! I also share tips on how to get back to sleep.

This episode sponsored by:

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[Sleep]: Weird Sleep Hack I Swear By, Ep. 789 Sep 07, 2022

I recently discovered something that helps me sleep better every time and it’s something you don’t often hear about. And that is turning off–or moving–your WiFi router before you go to bed. Call me crazy if you must, but I swear that WiFi keeps me awake! Maybe I’m just an environmentally-sensitive oddball… but maybe, you are two. I have an experiment for you to try, just to see if electromagnetic frequencies might be contributing to your sleep woes.

This episode sponsored by:

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[Sleep]: Light, Stars, and Blankets: Ingredients of a Good Night’s Sleep, Ep. 788 Sep 06, 2022

A good night’s sleep can feel elusive when you’re in the grip of insomnia. There are some very fundamental things that can you can do before bed that will help change your sleep story and get the rest you’re craving. Come learn both the what and the why of the key ingredients for sleep.

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[Sleep]: Things to Do During the Day to Help You Sleep at Night, Ep. 787 Sep 05, 2022

All your basic advice on sleeping better starts with developing a bedtime routine, which is a great thing to have (and one I talk about on tomorrow’s episode). BUT, good sleep starts much earlier in the day than bedtime. In fact, it starts as soon as you wake up.

Listen in and discover the things you can do during the day that will help you get the rest you need at night.

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[Breakfast]: Grab-and-Go Breakfast #4: Eggs on Wheels, Ep. 786 Sep 02, 2022

One criteria I had for this week’s grab-and-go breakfasts is that they do not involve dirtying a pan during the morning hustle. Which rules out eggs, right? Wrong. This is a cooking method for ‘fried’ eggs popularized by Mark Bittman that is going to crack breakfast wide open (I could not resist the pun).

Charity, whom I interviewed two episodes, has another mind-bending no-pan-dirtying way to cook eggs in the morning, so if you’re an egg lover, go listen to that episode, too.

What’s your favorite easy/tasty/healthy breakfast? Tell me at kate@katehanley.comand I’ll share it on a future episode!

This episode sponsored by:

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[Breakfast]: Grab-and-Go Breakfast #3: Portable Parfaits, Ep. 785 Sep 01, 2022

You probably are already aware of parfaits as a breakfast option. But did you know that you can pack them to go??? I’ve got a story, plus how to make them delicious without being a total sugar bomb, as, let’s face it, most parfaits are.

What’s your favorite easy/tasty/healthy breakfast? Tell me at kate@katehanley.comand I’ll share it on a future episode!

This episode sponsored by:

The Foodlets YouTube channel

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[Breakfast]: No-Drama Family Breakfasts, Ep. 784 Aug 31, 2022

Mornings are hectic. People are grumpy. And there’s breakfast to be had. Today I’m interviewing Charity Mathews of Foodlets.com and author of numerous cookbooks for kids about her best tips for making breakfast drama-free. (She shares a recipe that involves the microwave that blew my mind.)

Charity’s website

Foodlets on Instagram

Foodlets on Facebook

Foodlets on Pinterest

Charity’s books

What’s your favorite easy/tasty/healthy breakfast? Tell me at kate@katehanley.comand I’ll share it on a future episode!

This episode sponsored by:

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[Breakfast]: Grab-and-Go Breakfast #2: Dead Simple Chia Pudding, Ep. 783 Aug 30, 2022

I admit I discovered chia pudding when I was on the ketogenic diet a few years ago and needed something to fill the dessert void. But chia pudding also makes an awesome breakfast, tastes kind of like rice pudding (and if you’re not into that texture, I’ve got a fix for you), provides heaps of fiber, protein, and omega-3 fatty acids, and keeps you pleasantly full for a few hours.

PLUS, did I mention you really just have to stir some stuff together in the same jar that you store it in and eat it out of? I share the formula and lots of possible variations in this episode.

What’s your favorite easy/tasty/healthy breakfast? Tell me at kate@katehanley.comand I’ll share it on a future episode!

This episode sponsored by:

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[Breakfast]: Grab-and-Go Breakfast #1: Overnight Oats, Ep. 782 Aug 29, 2022

My kids are starting school today. My new highschooler needs to be ready for the bus at 7am (WHY?). And my mind has been whirling on what we can do about making breakfast easier while still providing plenty of fuel for all the thinking and learning and social navigation. I’ve come up with four customizable grab-and-go nutritious and tasty breakfasts throughout this week.

Today’s breakfast is overnight oats. I’ve got a foolproof formula, a host of possible toppings, and a couple of tricks to share.

What’s your favorite easy/tasty/healthy breakfast? Tell me at kate@katehanley.comand I’ll share it on a future episode!

This episode sponsored by:

Amazing article on what to do with old underwear and bras

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[Planet-Friendly Shopping]: The Best Places to Get Rid of Your Stuff. Ep. 781 Aug 26, 2022

We’ve all got stuff in our closet that we don’t wear, don’t like, maybe don’t even remember how it came to be ours. It might be tempting to just toss it into a dumpster and be done with it, or stick it in a bunch of trash bags and haul it to the local thrift store, but 57% of all donated items still end up in the landfill. Today I’m sharing how you can minimize the environmental impact of your unwanted stuff. It IS possible.

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[Planet-Friendly Shopping]: Two Keys to Sustainable Shopping–Spending Less, or More. Ep. 780 Aug 25, 2022

Sure it’s fun to get a bargain when you’re clothes shopping, but the fashion industry–particularly fast fashion–is really tough on the environment. Today I’m sharing an environmentally friendly way to get great clothes for cheap (that DOESN’T involve supporting cheap clothing brands that exploit human and natural resources). AND, how spending more money for the rest of your clothes saves you–and the planet–in the long run.

Today I’m talking about ways to responsibly spend less on the majority of the clothes you buy (in a planet-friendly way–no disposable clothes!), so that you can also spend more on certain pieces that are designed to last. It’s all geared to help you reduce the environmental impact of your clothing choices.

UN Environment Programme stats on the environmental impact of fast fashion

This episode sponsored by:

Sustainable Minimalists podcast

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[Planet-Friendly Shopping]: Doable Ways to Use Less Plastic, Ep. 779 Aug 24, 2022

Once hailed as the material of the future, plastic has become a real problem for the planet--it uses fossil fuels to make, burning it or letting it decompose releases a lot of chemicals into the environment, and recycling it doesn't seem to be making much of a dent. Is it possible to reduce your plastic in a meaningful--and still doable--way? That's what I’m asking Stephanie Seferian, author of Sustainable Minimalism: The Aspiring Minimalist’s Guide to Living Consciously and Contributing to a “Greener” Tomorrow, and the host of the Sustainable Minimalists podcast, which I love and think you will too.

Follow Stephanie on Instagram

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An article about the Movinga survey on percentage of clothes worn

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[Planet-Friendly Shopping]: The Single Most Environmentally-Friendly Place to Shop, Ep. 778 Aug 23, 2022

What do you do when you’re sick of what you’ve been wearing. OR, you’ve got something coming up where you want to look sharp. You go shopping, right!? Whee!! Well, yes, but you don’t need to leave the house to shop at the most environmentally sustainable place on the planet–AKA, your own closet.

ClosetMaid survey

Average items of clothing purchased each year

This episode sponsored by:

The EPA’s stats on textile use

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[Planet-Friendly Shopping]: One Question to Ask Before You Buy New Clothes, Ep. 777 Aug 22, 2022

Ever get home from a shopping trip and feel like you got swept up in the moment and you’re not really going to wear what you bought? Or opened a drawer or your closet and saw stuff in there still with tags on it, and felt guilty about wasting money? I’ve got a question to ask yourself that can help change that.

It’s part of a week of episodes on planet-friendly shopping. After all, it’s back-to-school season, and even if you aren’t headed back to the halls of learning (or are responsible for a child who is), the urge to buy new dungarees, notebooks, and backpacks is STRONG. Let’s consume consciously. Whaddyasay?

Marge Piercy poem: “To Be of Use”

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[Mid-year Check-in]: Re-Connect with a Pre-Pandemic Friend, Ep. 776 Aug 19, 2022

Is there someone in particular, or maybe even a group of people you’ve lost touch with in the last couple years? If yes, it makes sense–a global pandemic can really put a damper on your social activities!

This week I’m talking about taking stock of where you’re at in general at this point in the pandemic and in the year. And a cool way to do that is to reach out to someone that you’ve lost touch with since the world shut down in early 2020. When the two of you catch up, it’s a great chance to verbally process what you experienced and what you learned from it.

Send me your better person questions! Email: kate@beabetterpersonpodcast.com

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[Mid-year Check-in]: A Fun Way to Think About Your Journey, Ep. 775 Aug 18, 2022

How often do you think about how your life has been going up to this point? Not very often, right? I’ve got an exercise for you today that can help you get a little objectivity and clarity on who you are and what you’ve done that’s also just a fun thought experiment, and that is to think about what the title of your memoir would be.

Those prompts again are:

A specific incident or place that has shaped you

Finish the phrase This is the Story of ____ or A Year of _____

A phrase you heard a lot or say a lot

The most provocative thing you believe

The Art of Memoir by Mary Karr

This episode sponsored by:

Home yoga practice summertime bingo

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[Mid-Year Check-in]: Trick Yourself into Doing the Things You Avoid, Ep. 774 Aug 17, 2022

So maybe there’s something on your goal list for 2022 that you haven’t been doing–something like exercise, or saving more, or marketing your business or even posting on social media. You’re just not doing it.

Today I’m sharing something that helps me tremendously, and it’s really kinda silly. But hey, so be it. It’s turning the thing you don’t want to do into a game. Specifically, into a game of bingo.

Couple of examples:

Summer reading bingo from The Novel Neighbor in Missouri

This episode sponsored by:

BBC article on increase in texting during pandemic

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[Mid-year Check-in]: Normalize Longer Response Times, Ep. 773 Aug 16, 2022

As we ponder what we want to do differently in the months to come, I’ve got a suggestion that will help us all take our stress levels down. Can we all just be cool with our electronic communications taking a little longer? This is my prayer (and it should help us dial back that screen use that spiraled out of control out of lockdown and, let’s be honest, hasn’t really come back down.)

Is there a way to create a little more space around our digital communications that I forgot? Let me know! kate@beabetterpersonpodcast.com.

This episode sponsored by:

27 Ways to Take Stock for Evaluate Your Life Day

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[Mid-year Check-in]: How to Do a Mid-Year Review, Ep. 772 Aug 15, 2022

Now that we’re three years into the pandemic–and in the last stages of summer when you can feel fall getting ready to come swinging in like Miley Cyrus on her wrecking ball–we’re in a collective contemplative moment. In today’s episode I’ll talk you through how to check in on your yearly goals, as well as a bigger picture check-in on how you’re doing in general at this particular juncture in time.

Goals review:

What goals have I achieved?

What haven’t I completed but have made progress on?

What haven’t I done because I’m no longer interested?

Is there anything new I want to add,

Taking stock in general:

What’s going well?

What isn’t going as well as I’d like?

Where is my energy being drawn?

What things am I feeling repelled by?

What do I need more of?

What could I stand less of?

Relevant blog post:

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[pod swap]: Bob Ross to the Rescue, from Julie Merica, Ep. 771 Aug 12, 2022

We all need inspiration in this life and one place I get mine is from my podcast crush–Make Your Damn Bed, a short daily podcast from Chicago-based comedian Julie Merica.

Today I’m sharing one of my all-time favorite Make Your Damn Bed episodes, about the healing powers of watching Bob Ross (the groovy 70s artist who had a painting show on PBS for decades). Get ready to feel soothed, inspired, and ready to find a way to work with any jacked up stuff that lands smack dab in the middle of your day.

If you are digging Julie, go subscribe to Make Your Damn Bed! She’s also a great follow on Instagram.

Send me your better person Qs and I’ll answer them on a future episode! kate@beabetterpersonpodcast.com

This episode sponsored by:

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[pod swap]: Mise en Place Your Life, from Julie Merica, Ep. 770 Aug 11, 2022

I’ve got a podcast crush–a show that I love that I think you will too. It’s Make Your Damn Bed, from Chicago-based comedian Julie Merica, who is just a peach of a human–plus, funny!--and who also offers short daily episodes to help you look for the good and bring your best.

Today and tomorrow I’m running one of Julie’s episodes in my feed. Today’s is all about creating that wonderful feeling of having your shit together by using a technique from the cooking world–”mise en place,” which is a French phrase that means “putting in place” or “gather.” Down South, where I went to high school, you might call it “fixin’ to get ready,” and it can give you a stable platform for the rest of your day–heck, even your life. Julie explains.

If you are digging Julie, go subscribe to Make Your Damn Bed! She’s also a great follow on Instagram.

Send me your better person Qs and I’ll answer them on a future episode! kate@beabetterpersonpodcast.com

This episode sponsored by:

Nutrafol.com (use the promo code BETTER)

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[Community]: Finding a Sense of Belonging, Ep. 769 Aug 10, 2022

Having a sense of community and a feeling of belonging to where you live is so important–both to a life well lived and your overall wellbeing. Yet, at this stage in the pandemic, so many people are at least considering how and even where they want to live after the pandemic.

Today I’m talking with Melody Warnick, a journalist who has written two great books on the importance of place–This Is Where You Belong and her brand new book If You Could Live Anywhere. Melody can help you figure out where you’re going to feel at home, and then how to up your sense of belonging once you’re there (even if you’ve lived there a long time).

Melody Warnick’s website

Melody’s books

Send me your better person Qs and I’ll answer them on a future episode! kate@beabetterpersonpodcast.com

This episode is sponsored by:

A link to the New York Times article on light trespassing

Nutrafol.com (use the promo code BETTER)

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[Community]: Is Your Light Trespassing on Others?, Ep. 768 Aug 09, 2022

There’s something you might be doing every night without even thinking about it that could be negatively impacting your neighbors, your community, and the environment. It’s flicking a switch and turning an outside light on. Which doesn’t seem like that big a deal, right? But it can have a lot of repercussions that you’ll learn about today.

Send me your better person Qs and I’ll answer them on a future episode! kate@beabetterpersonpodcast.com

This episode sponsored by:

Study showing oxytocin’s links to aging

Nutrafol.com (use the promo code BETTER)

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[Community]: How to Boost Oxytocin, the Hormone of Connection, Ep. 767 Aug 08, 2022

Feeling connected to other people feels nice, but can it actually improve your health? Yes it can, and there’s one particular hormone that makes that statement true, and that’s oxytocin, aka the love hormone, which I’m sharing some cool factoids about today, as well as how you can raise it and get the health benefits it brings while ALSO feeling a stronger connection to others.

Study that showed that watching an emotional video increased generosity to strangers

Send me your better person Qs and I’ll answer them on a future episode! kate@beabetterpersonpodcast.com

This episode sponsored by:

Nutrafol.com (use the promo code BETTER)

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[Grab Bag]: What NOT to Do During a Road Rage Incident (Please!), Ep. 766 Aug 05, 2022

Let’s just say that when you’re just out and about, running errands and minding your business, an angry driver honks at you, yells at you, and flips you off. And, your kid is in the car with you. What do you do?

Well, I’ll share what NOT to do in today’s episode, based on a true story! Yep, I’m coming clean on my road rage issues today and sharing a cautionary tale.

Send me your better person Qs! Email: kate@beabetterpersonpodcast.com

This episode sponsored by:

Pamela Adlon on Fresh Air

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[Grab Bag]: A Mentorship in Messy Motherhood, Ep 765 Aug 04, 2022

This summer I’ve been re-watching the show “Better Things,” with Pamela Adlon, on Hulu, and I I love it for its lessons in reality, and unreality, and how messy motherhood and modern life and also, how despite it all, there are so many moments of truth and beauty. It’s like one of my favorite Dolly Parton sayings, “It’s all wrong but it’s all right.”

Send me your better person Qs! Email: kate@beabetterpersonpodcast.com

This episode sponsored by:

Easy Beauty, Chloe Cooper Jones

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[Grab Bag]: Awesome Summer Reads, Memoirs, Ep. 764 Aug 03, 2022

Summer + reading = two of my most favorite words. Today I’m sharing the 2 memoirs I read in various summery locations that I just capital-L Loved:

Punch Me Up to the Gods, Brian Broome

“Fearing For His Life” – Chloe Cooper Jones’ Pulitzer-nominated article

Let’s connect on Goodreads

Send me your better person Qs! Email: kate@beabetterpersonpodcast.com

This episode sponsored by:

You Made a Fool of Death with Your Beauty, Akweake Emezi

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[Grab Bag]: Awesome Summer Reads, Novels, Ep. 763 Aug 02, 2022

Need ideas for what to read this summer, whether you’re hitting the beach or just chilling in bed? I’ve got 4 suggestions for you–all ones I read while I was on vacation and loved. Today I’m talking about the two novels I read, one’s romance, one’s YA, both are awesome.

The Falling Girls, Hayley Krischer

Let’s connect on Goodreads

Send me your better person Qs! Email: kate@beabetterpersonpodcast.com

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[Grab Bag]: Finding Your Lost Money–A Crazy Story, Ep. 762 Aug 01, 2022

What if there was money out there somewhere that belonged to you but you didn’t know it was there? Wouldn’t it be cool if there were a search engine where you could type in your name and see if there were any old paychecks that never made their way to you, or a 401K account from your first job that you forgot about, or a refund from a company. Welp, there is! And I have got a nutty story for you about it.

Planet Money Escheat show

Send me your better person Qs! Email: kate@beabetterpersonpodcast.com

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[Vacation]: How to Handle Vacation Letdown, Ep. 761 Jul 29, 2022

Have you ever gotten home from vacation and felt… sad? Out of it? Just not like yourself? That very real phenomenon is what we’re talking about today. Both why it happens, and what you can do about it.

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[Vacation]: Dealing with Vacation Blues, Ep. 760 Jul 28, 2022

When you think of vacation, you think of something positive–fun, adventure, relaxation, being carefree. And yes all those things can happen. But sometimes, you can also feel a little sad, displaced, or just…wonky…when you’re on holiday. I call ‘em the vacation blues, and today we’re talking about why they can happen and what to do about them.

This episode sponsored by:

The Novel Neighbor on Instagram

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[Vacation]: Finding the Perfect Beach Read, Ep. 759 Jul 27, 2022

Let’s talk one of the most important things about vacation: What book–or books–to read. I mean, vacation time is so precious, you don’t want to be stuck with a book that you’re just not feeling!

To help you choose your vacation reading material, today I’m talking with Holland Saltsman, owner of the independent bookstore The Novel Neighbor in the Webster Groves neighborhood of St. Louis, Missouri.

The Novel Neighbor website (for Summer Bingo and Mystery Boxes)

The Novel Neighbor on TikTok

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[Vacation]: Making a Kickass Packing List, Ep. 758 Jul 26, 2022

Vacation is fun to think about, but less fun to pack for. I just got back from our first ever two-week vacation and feel, for the first time, that I really nailed the packing. So I’m sharing the packing strategy I used with you!

Here are those categories:

Exercise, lounging, dressing up, weather, activities, every day, toiletries, entertainment

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My interview with Ashley Whillans on overcoming time poverty

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[Vacation]: Staying Healthy While You’re On Vacation, Ep. 757 Jul 25, 2022

Raise your hand if you’ve ever gotten home from a vacation and felt like you needed to check into a detox facility. Or, as the saying goes, you needed a vacation to recover from your vacation. Today, we’re talking about how to have plenty of fun when you’re away without overindulging to the point that you feel like crap.

Interview with Ashley Whillans on the benefits of vacation time

Study on the benefits of 11 minutes of exercise

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[Perfectionism]: Who Is Your Messy Mentor?, Ep. 756 Jul 22, 2022

[Note–this is a replay episode! So if you hear an out-of-date reference to COVID, that’s why. New episodes start again July 25.]

Seeing people’s perfectly coiffed selves and photoshoot-ready homes on social media fuels our perfectionism and causes our mood to dip. But… why are we looking at these accounts? What if you filled your feed with people who looked like a real person, complete with bad hair days and a messy room in the background? I call these folks your messy mentors, and if you don’t have any, well… I say start with Amy Schumer.

Wall Street Journal article on the effects of social media on young women’s mental health

This episode sponsored by:

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[Perfectionism]: Your Mess Is Your Message, Ep. 755 Jul 21, 2022

[Note–this is a replay episode! So if you hear an out-of-date reference to COVID, that’s why. New episodes start again July 25.]

We all have things about ourselves that we’re not proud of. Maybe we even feel ashamed of. Could be big, little, or somewhere in between. And perfectionism is a natural outcropping of wanting to compensate for those things.

But the truth is, your imperfections, failures, struggles, and things you’ve gotten wrong all give you wisdom and strength. And despite what your inner critic might try to tell you, they are exactly the things you can help other people with. The more you can accept your imperfections, the more impact you can have in your world and the world at large. Let’s discuss.

This episode sponsored by:

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Tara’s book, The Kindness Cure

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[Perfectionism]: Kill Your Inner Critic with Self-Kindness, Ep. 754 Jul 20, 2022

[Note–this is a replay episode! So if you hear an out-of-date reference to COVID, that’s why. New episodes start again July 25.]

As honorable as it is to care about being a better person and to give a shit about bringing your best and making a difference, we can go overboard with it all and feel like crap if we’re not doing our best at all times.

Today I’m talking to someone who can help us embrace all the ways we’re imperfect– therapist and meditation teacher Tara Cousineau. Tara is author of The Kindness Cure, creator of the course Overcome Perfectionism Through Self-Compassion for the meditation app Insight Timer, and a faculty member at the Harvard Medical School’s Center for Mindfulness and Compassion, Cambridge Health Alliance, MA.

Tara’s website

This episode sponsored by:

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[Perfectionism]: Surprising Ways Perfectionism Shows Up, Ep. 753 Jul 19, 2022

[Note–this is a replay episode! So if you hear an out-of-date reference to COVID, that’s why. New episodes start again July 25.]

Perfectionism isn’t just the type A, dot every i and cross every T form personality that a lot of people associate with the term. It can show up in a lot of sneaky ways, including procrastination, workaholism, impostor syndrome, difficulty delegating, picking fights, and numbing out.

Come listen to learn how, even if you’re not a detail-oriented person, you might still be in perfectionism’s grip.

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[Perfectionism]:The Roots of Perfectionism, Ep. 752 Jul 18, 2022

[Note–this is a replay episode! So if you hear an out-of-date reference to COVID, that’s why. New episodes start again July 25.] Perfectionism is an understandable and natural response to an increasingly uncertain world. It’s a coping mechanism that, at some point, starts to create more problems than it solves.

Albert Einstein said that in order to find a solution, you really have to understand the true nature of the problem. So in this episode, we’re looking at where perfectionism comes from, in the name of being able to find truly helpful ways out of it.

2017 study on the rise of perfectionism among college students

Study that shows anxiety is on the rise

This episode sponsored by:

Nutrafol (promo code ‘BETTER’)

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[Creativity]: “What If It’s Not Any Good?” How to Work with Your Inner Critic, Ep. 751 Jul 15, 2022

[Note–this is a replay episode! So if you hear an out-of-date reference to COVID, that’s why. New episodes start again July 25.]

One huge obstacle to creativity is your inner critic, which is a negative commentary that’s coming from inside your head, so it’s very hard to have perspective on. The inner critic has good intentions–it’s basically trying to help ou not look like a fool for doing something badly–but really, sometimes you have to do things badly in order to do the things that matter. Meaning, sometimes you’ve really got to stink up the place. So let’s talk about how to work with the inner critic so that it doesn’t derail your creative efforts, or make them more painful than they need to be.

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[Creativity]: How to Get Inspired, Ep. 750 Jul 14, 2022

[Note–this is a replay episode! So if you hear an out-of-date reference to COVID, that’s why. New episodes start again July 25.]

Here are some tried and true ways to get into that state where inspiration is rushing in to meet you, like Kermit and Miss Piggy racing toward each other across a grassy field.

Let’s talk where to go and what to do get those creative ideas flowing.

2012 study about how going on a hiking trip makes you 50 percent more creative than folks who stay home

2013 study on the power of spending time in green spaces to turn on your creative faucet

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[Creativity]: How to Make Art, Even If You’re ‘Not Artistic’, Ep. 749 Jul 13, 2022

[Note–this is a replay episode! So if you hear an out-of-date reference to COVID, that’s why. New episodes start again July 25.]

So, HOW do you incorporate creativity into a pretty gosh darn busy life? Like, really… let’s talk nuts and bolts.

Today I'm interviewing Jackie Dishner, an Arizona-based artist, author, and writer who teaches creativity classes. I'm gonna get her to break it down for me like I'm 5 years old so that we can all see our way to gettin' our creative on.

Jackie knows not only about how to tap creativity to produce art, but also how to use that creativity muscle to pivot in your business and your life. After this interview I used one of her tips to draw a picture of my husband when he was in the 7th grade–and it turned out pretty well!!

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[Creativity]: Two Things to Try When You Don’t Feel Creative, Ep. 748 Jul 12, 2022

[Note–this is a replay episode! So if you hear an out-of-date reference to COVID, that’s why. New episodes start again July 25.]

Maybe creativity isn’t something that you feel you have. Or maybe it feels elusive. I mean, of course–no one feels creative every minute of every day. But none of that means you’re NOT creative. It just means you might need a way in. I’m sharing two of those ways in this episode. They are: curiosity, and willingness. Listen in for specific questions to ask and things to try to put these two traits into play and get your creative flow going.

(Also, as an update on my personal curiosity list, I have only pursued one of them – garden design. Hey! It’s something.)

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[Creativity]: How Creativity Helps Your Mental Health, Ep. 747 Jul 11, 2022

[Note–this is a replay episode! So if you hear an out-of-date reference to COVID, that’s why. New episodes start again July 25.]

Sure, creative pursuits are fun but are they actually good for you? Oh my goodness yes–in this episode we cover the many mental and emotional benefits of simple, everyday acts of creativity can boost your mood, help you process stuff, and increase your experience of

Studies about creativity’s influence on positive emotions

Other studies about creativity’s positive impact on depression and anxiety

New York Times article about the family who made one origami crane for every day of lockdown

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[Earn More]: 3 Things to Consider Before Starting a Side Hustle, Ep. 746 Jul 08, 2022

There’s one tried and true way of earning more money that’s practically the American way – starting a side hustle. What do you need to think about before you decide to go for it? So that it doesn’t become just another way that you over-work yourself? That’s what we’re talking about today.

This episode is sponsored by:

My interview with Jennifer Barrett on how to think like a breadwinner

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[Earn More]: 4 Ways Earn More Money Without Spending More Hours Working Ep. 745 Jul 07, 2022

It may feel like the only way to earn more money is to work more hours but that’s a false belief. It’s also possible to get paid for things that are intangible, like connections, and to get paid multiple times for work that you do once. Today we’re talking about how to get out of the paradigm of trading time for dollars.

It’s part of a week of episodes on earning more. And may I say, this is when things get really juicy!

Smart Passive Income

Think Like a Breadwinner book

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[Earn More]: Stealthy Strategies for Getting a Raise Ep. 744 Jul 06, 2022

Perhaps the most obvious way to earn more money–which is the subject of all the episodes here on How to Be a Better Person this week–is to get a raise at work. And yet, according to a Payscale survey, 60% of Americans have never asked for a raise. Today’s episode is designed to keep you out of this 60%!

I’m talking with DeAnne Pearson, a career coach in Austin, Texas, and the founder of DeliberateCareers.com. I've sent many people to DeAnne over the years to help them figure out how to earn more while also enjoying their work more. I love her loving straight talk, and I think you will too.

[After this question: " A lot of times the only thing standing between us and making more money is us... we're not feeling confident enough to make the ask, or are more focused on why it won't work than how it could. What kind of a pep talk can you give to someone who needs a little oomph to go about asking for that raise or promotion." ... you can start DeAnne's answer when she says “One of the first things I would say is…."--and cut what she said before.]

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[Earn More]: Is Your Clutter Valuable? How to Sell the Stuff You Don’t Use, Need, and/or Like, Ep. 743 Jul 05, 2022

We all have stuff we don’t use, wear, or even like. We have so much stuff it can’t even fit in our house: 38 percent of all Americans have a self-storage unit. Today we’re talking about how to turn that stuff into cash.

Today I’m going to share how you can sell your jewelry, clothes, kids’ stuff, furniture, sporting goods, books, and everything else. Let’s find you some money today!

Cashforgoldusa.com

Poshmark (use code KATE_HANLEY for a $10 credit)

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[Earn More]: Make the Money You Already Have–or Spend–Work Harder for You, Ep. 742 Jul 04, 2022

Hey, happy Fourth of July!!

Let’s get some financial freedom happening around here, whaddyasay?

I’m covering two ways you can get the money you already have, or are already spending, to help you earn more money with either a high-yield savings account, which can help you get a MEGA SIGNIFICANTLY BETTER return on whatever money you are currently keeping in a regular savings, and by figuring out which credit card can help you get the most cash back (and maybe a cash incentive or frequent flier mile infusion).

Websites mentioned in this episode:

Bankrate.com

Thepointsguy.com

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[Money]: What Costs You Should NOT Cut. Ep. 741 Jul 01, 2022

There are things you should NOT cut your spending on even though prices have risen. I can't tell you exactly what those things are, but I CAN help you figure it out for yourself.

Judge me if you will, but one of my non-negotiables is a cleaning person--it gives me my weekend back (although, really, I still spend most of the weekend doing others chores; they're just ones I basically enjoy) AND it saves my relationship.

Don't worry -- you can fund these things by plugging up the leaks and upping your ingenuity, as discussed in earlier episodes this week (so scroll down and listen if you missed 'em).

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[Money]: How Saving Money Can Be Fun, Ep. 740 Jun 30, 2022

Spending money on new stuff is sometimes necessary but it’s not always required–especially when you start thinking creatively about what you already have. Turning up your ingenuity muscles is a fun and gratifying way to help yourself spend less–and we’re going to talk about how to do it today.

And, no, you don't need a glue gun or a can of spray paint or hidden talent for upcycling. PHEW.

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[Money]: The Recession is Coming; Here’s How to Deal: Ep. 739 Jun 29, 2022

Prices are rising, maybe a recession is looming. What are some practical ways to protect your financial health? That's what we're talking about today, when I'm interviewing Emma Johnson, author of The Kickass Single Mom and the 30-Day Kickass Single Mom Money Makeover and founder of the website wealthysinglemommy.com. Emma's a financial expert whose advice applies to everyone, no matter your parental or marital status and I love her no-nonsense approach and I think you will too.

As Emma says about the economy, "The party is over." So... does that mean we have to start clipping coupons? Nope--but we can definitely spend less while appreciating more, and Emma walks us through how to do it.

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[Money]: Save Money by Plugging Up the Leaks in Your Budget: Ep. 738 Jun 28, 2022

Spending money on things you don’t use, need, like or even realize you’re spending is like trying to fetch water with a colander–or like your bank account has sprung a leak. Today we’re talking about how to plug up the little–or maybe big–leaks in your monthly expenses so you have more money to do things that matter, like give, save, invest, or donate, without impacting your bottom line.

Let's find you some extra money, whaddya say?! (I saved $324 in about 15 minutes... get pumped!)

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[Money] A Pep Talk for Spending Less, Ep. 737 Jun 27, 2022

How can you spend what you need to spend and still keep yourself financially healthy in uncertain times? It starts with your mindset, and that’s what we’re talking about today–a positive way to think about spending less.

It’s part of two weeks of episodes on money. This week is all about spending less of it. And next week is earning more of it. Because there are of course two sides to the equation, and there’s only so much spending you can cut, whereas earning more has a lot more potential for growth.

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[Body Acceptance Strategies]: Turn In Your Body Police Badge, EP: 736 Jun 24, 2022

Our collective culture has always prized certain body types and sizes over others. We reinforce it in the paintings, photos, television shows, movies and social media posts that we watch. They say representation matters, because when you see those same images of the same types of physical appearances over and over and over again you internalize that look as the best way to look. Meaning, you become a member of the body police–and you start looking for all the ways you and the other people you see don’t fit those idealized images.

So let's all turn in our badges and retire from the body police force, whaddyasay? Here's how.

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[Body Acceptance Strategies]: Give Your Body a Voice, EP: 735 Jun 23, 2022

It’s easy to be critical of your body when you’re only thinking about how it looks. When you start engaging the ole bod in a dialogue and hearing what it has to say, it helps deepen your relationship with and respect for it. You're not gonna talk smack about someone who's helping you live your best life, are you?

10 Principles of Intuitive Eating

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[Body Acceptance Strategies]: Where Body Un-Acceptance Comes From and What to Do About It. EP: 734 Jun 22, 2022

I’m super excited about today’s episode because it’s a topic I’ve been really feeling into lately, both as a woman who recently got my menopause wings (I don't call menopause "The Thickening" for nothing), and as the mother of two young teens who are going through all the changes that come with puberty. But body acceptance is really vital at any age, and that’s what today’s guest can help us think about in new ways.

Today I’m talking with Alissa Rumsey, a New York City Registered Dietitian & Nutrition Therapist and author of the book "Unapologetic Eating" for her take on why it's so easy to NOT be accepting of our own bodies, what we can do about it, and how our feelings about our own bodies relates to broader issues of social justice and helping people of all KINDS of bodies feel more acceptance.

Check out Alissa's website and book

Follow Alissa on Instagram

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[Body Acceptance Strategies]: Wearing Clothes That Fit, EP: 733 Jun 21, 2022

Body acceptance is something that’s pretty internal. It comes from changing how you think and feel, and while I LOVE talking about the mind component of any change, sometimes you just want to know what to DO differently.

Today I’m sharing something you can do. And that is to wear clothes that fit your body--no more squeezing in to the size you wish you were or think you should be, or hiding under a too big size. Let's just let our bodies be seen in their actual size!

How to Fix Vanity Sizing (Time Magazine link)

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[Body Acceptance Strategies]: 3 New Ways to Think About Your Body, EP: 732 Jun 20, 2022

After we’ve all been cooped up with the pandemic, a lot of us are feeling like we’re emerging with a different body than we went in with thanks to all kinds of reasons, from stress eating to working at home where the fridge is always right there. AND, our collective culture has been teaching us for centuries that certain body types are better than others, and we’ve internalized those messages. When really, the only people who benefit from maintaining any kind of physical ideal are the diet industry, the pharmaceutical industry, the supplement industry, and the plastic surgery industry.

These episodes are my prayer that we can find our way to feeling good with our bodies as they are, or at least feeling better (which is always the goal here at How to Be a Better Person).

Here's the pic of me in the documentary that my friend saw

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[Power Snacks]: Yes, Popcorn Is a Healthy Snack!, EP: 731 Jun 17, 2022

Today we’re talking about a power snack that you might be thinking that, yeah, it’s really tasty, but it’s not actually healthy, right?

This snack of mystery that we’re breaking down today is popcorn. It’s part of a week of episodes on easy ways to up the nutrient-density of your diet by upgrading your snacks. I saved popcorn for last because it’s probably the most FUN snack on the list. But why is it included on a list of nutritious snacks?

Well, first of all, popcorn is a whole grain. And it's got a surprising number of antioxidants and minerals. And it's fairly low-carb!

I also share the only way to cook it, as well as what to put on it. PLUS -- I want to know, what power snacks do you love that I didn't talk about??? Post a pic on IG and tag me @katehanleyauthor, I wanna see AND I'd love to share your ideas in this weekend's newsletter!

This episode sponsored by Aura Frames. Use code PERSON to save $20 on the perfect Father's Day gift while supplies last!

Get your daily nutritional insurance with AG1 at https://athleticgreens.com/better.

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[Power Snacks]: 9 Ways to Jazz Up Hard-Boiled Eggs, EP: 730 Jun 16, 2022

What’s a snack that you can pre-cook in large quantities, will stay fresh in the fridge for a long time, you can eat on its own or dip into something you probably already have in your fridge to make it taste completely different and new?

It’s the humble, hard-working hard-boiled egg.

I’m going to give you the hard sell on this awesome snack as part of a week of episodes on 5 power snacks that will help you both help you up the nutrient-density of your everyday diet AND answer the age-old question of, what should I eat?

This episode includes 9 ways to jazz up your hard-boiled egg! And my foolproof way to cook them perfectly.

This episode sponsored by Aura Frames. Use code PERSON to save $20 on the perfect Father's Day gift while supplies last!

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[Power Snacks]: Why Seeds Are the Bomb, EP: 729 Jun 15, 2022

Today’s power snack is more of a category than a particular snack, but that just means it comes with tons of options so you won’t get sick of it any time soon, and it is: SEEDS.

Why seeds? As the baby of a tree or a plant, they contain everything a new plant being needs to come alive and thrive. Which means they are PACKED with nutrition. Come hear for yourself the impressive list of nutrients and benefits, and learn a no-recipe recipe for a tahini/miso sauce (tahini is ground up sesame seeds, which have more calcium than dairy) that you will want to put on everything (or perhaps even eat with a spoon).

Study that shows that flax seeds are the HIGHEST SOURCE of lignans of any food.

321 tahini sauce: 3 tbsp. tahini, 2 tbsp. miso, 1 tbsp. lemon juice, stir and thin with water to taste.

This episode sponsored by Aura Frames. Use code PERSON to save $20 on the perfect Father's Day gift while supplies last!

Get your daily nutritional insurance with AG1 at https://athleticgreens.com/better.

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[Power Snacks]: Bet You Didn't Know These Two Snacks Were Probiotics, EP: 728 Jun 14, 2022

Today, on this week of episodes focusing on power snacks that are equal parts easy, delicious and nutritious, I’m talking about a couple of snacks that are especially great for those times you’re not crazy hungry but you’re more looking for a party in your mouth–something to break up the day. As fermented foods, they are also good–and unexpected–sources of probiotics.

Specifically, I’m talking about pickles and olives.

With info on the beauty of the pickle plate, and the surprise revelation that these are both fermented foods and thus, good sources of probiotics (something we would ideally eat a little of every day).

Research on the elaic acid in olives and its role in mitigating breast cancer risk.

This episode sponsored by Aura Frames. Use code PERSON to save $20 on the perfect Father's Day gift while supplies last!

Get your daily nutritional insurance with AG1 at https://athleticgreens.com/better.

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[Power Snacks]: The Beauty of Berries, EP: 727 Jun 13, 2022

After last week’s episodes on getting involved in the effort to curb gun violence, I felt like we could all use a subject that was a little less… intense. (Myself included.) You know, a little palate cleanser. And that subject, is snacks.

Specifically snacks that are a) yummy, because, of course taste comes first, and b) easy to pull together, because when you want a snack you and it now, and c) healthy. Maybe even ridiculously healthy. Like, if you ate more of these foods your nutrient density and overall health would likely improve. That’s what we’re talking about this week on the podcast. I call ‘em power snacks.

And the first snack that will up your nutrition is... berries. They're low-glycemic and they're high in all kinds of antioxidants thanks to their deep hues. You can eat them fresh or frozen. Heck, you can grow them!

I share my all-time fave smoothie recipe and four other ways to snack well with berries. (Ooh, there's also a one-ingredient sorbet recipe.)

This episode sponsored by Aura Frames. Use code PERSON to save $20 on the perfect Father's Day gift while supplies last!

Get your daily nutritional insurance with AG1 at https://athleticgreens.com/better.

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[Working for Change}: 5 Ways to Use Social Media for Good, EP: 726 Jun 10, 2022

You know social media is a fun way to stay in touch with friends, promote your offerings if you’re a business owner, and follow your favorite influencers. But can it also be a powerful tool for creating change? Why yes, yes it can. That’s what we’re covering today–5 ways to use social media for activist purposes.

Follow Shannon Watts on Twitter

Follow me on Twitter

Sign up for Moms Demand Action--text ACT to 644-33

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[Working for Change]: 3 Tricks to Make Activism Less Scary and/or Intense, EP: 725 Jun 09, 2022

If you really want to do something to help change a big issue but your knees are knocking a little bit, or a lot, I get it. The thought of attending a march, or making calls to your fellow citizens, or knocking on doors can be a little–or a lot–intimidating. As someone who has felt those fears and done those things anyway, I can relate. AND I can report that once you’re in motion, those fears recede and it feels so good to be doing something for the common good. And today, I’m going to share three specific tricks I’ve learned since I first phone banked for a candidate in 2016 to make activism less scary and more FUN.

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[Working for Change]: What Can One Person Do About Gun Violence? EP: 724 Jun 08, 2022

There’s no two ways about it–gun violence in America is a public health problem. Gun violence kills over 110 Americans every single day, and is now the number one cause of death in children. It’s a huge problem that we owe it to our children to solve. And yet, it’s a huge problem. What can one person even do?

That’s what you’re going to learn on today’s episode.

I’m interviewing Jennifer Boylan, who is the volunteer, legislative and elections lead of the Rhode Island chapter of Moms Demand Action–the volunteer organization devoted to passing common sense gun laws and reducing gun violence that has over 8 million supporters nationwide, with a chapter in all 50 states.

Join Moms Demand--text ACT to 644-33

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[Working for Change]: Use Activism to Break Out of Your Bubble, EP: 723 Jun 07, 2022

Just a warning, I’m talking about upsetting subjects in this episode, such as gun violence, so if you’re listening with kids around, or you’re in a place where you need to take care of yourself and what you’re exposed to, come back tomorrow, when I’m sharing three ways to make activism less overwhelming, intense, and/or scary.

Gandhi said to be the change you wish to see, and of course, he’s right–we can’t wait for others to do things differently, we have to start with ourselves. But, if you only ever think about issues in terms of what you yourself want, well…it’s not actually all that helpful. Because one person only has one experience, and issues affect multiple people, sometimes millions or even billions of people. Wanting to get involved and create change is noble and good and I hope you act on that desire. But I also hope that you use that desire to break out of your bubble and consider how other people are impacted by that same issue–especially those people who have the most at stake. That’s what we’re talking about today.

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[Working for Change]: Upset by the Mass Shootings? This Is How You Feel Better, EP: 722 Jun 06, 2022

Just a heads up that the episodes this week were inspired by the upset so many of us, myself included, felt after the events in Uvalde, Texas and Buffalo, New York. So if you’re listening with kids around, or you’re in a tender place, take care while listening as we will be talking about tough topics.

It’s easy to numb out. And it may seem easy for other people to move on. But if in your heart, you haven’t moved on--maybe you’re nervous to send your kids to school, or maybe you're feeling helpless and sad--this episode is for you.

Because wrapped inside that upset is a desire for change. And that desire is here for a reason. I hope this episode will help you open the door to that desire, because your origin story as an agent of change is on the other side.

Join Moms Demand--text ACT to 644-33

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[Letting Go]: Letting Go of the Need to Be in Control (Moms, I’m Looking at Us), EP: 721 Jun 03, 2022

There is a unique kind of control that a lot of mothers–myself included–display. It's called maternal gatekeeping, where we think no one else (including our partners in parenting) is as good a caretaker as we are. And while it’s understandable why we seek this level of control, it’s also not helping anyone. So let’s see what we can do to loosen our grip.

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[Letting Go]: 3 Energetic Exercises to Help You Cut the Cord, EP: 720 Jun 02, 2022

Sometimes there are things that you feel like you've let go, or that you should have let go already, when in truth it still feels like they’re clinging to you, like cigarette smoke gets in your hair and you can smell it the next morning, if you’re old enough to remember going to restaurants and bars where smoking was permitted.

Here are three practices you can do in those instances to wash that smoke right outta your hair--three practices that work on the energetic level.

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[Letting Go]: Letting Go of Anxiety and the Need to Feel Productive, EP: 719 Jun 01, 2022

If anyone’s ever told you to let something go, you may have thought about telling them where they can stick it; or you may have thought–I wish I could! I don’t know how.

Today I’m interviewing Nina Purewal, co-author of the international bestseller Let that Sh*t Go. We talk about how you have to let shit out before you can let it go, and how to let go of things that might actually seem like they're constructive--like being uber-productive.

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[Letting Go]: How Letting Go of Expectations Helps You Grow Spiritually, Ep. 718 May 31, 2022

Expectations are a real bugger.

They make us feel like if things don't happen the way we think they will, that there's something wrong with us. But of course, things rarely happen the way we think they will.

So how can we start to let those buggers go? Especially when we're not always aware that we have them in the first place?

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[Letting Go]: 2 Key Ingredients for Letting Go of Old Ideas Ep. 717 May 30, 2022

"You've got to let it go." It's something we're told, and say to others, all the time. But it. Ain't. Easy!

This week we're talking about how to really let go of all kinds of stuff. Including, today, stale old ideas. Because if being a better person is important to you, better implies change. It means progress. And progress does not come from putting your fingers in your ears and saying 'la la la, I already know everything!'

Today’s episode was inspired by a listener named Chris, who DM’d me on Twitter to suggest this topic. So if you have a topic you’d like me to cover in the future, hit me up! I’m katewhanley on Twitter, or you can email me at kate@katehanley.com.

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[Time Savvy]: Discover and Make Peace With Your Own Personal Pace, EP: 716 May 27, 2022

We each have our own unique pace–some of us are hares, and naturally move quickly, while others of us are more tortoises, and we move a little bit more slowly and just tend to have less urgency. And sometimes we’re a mash-up of the two–I call those tor-tares, where sometimes you’re fast, and sometimes you’re slow. Do you know which one you are? Let’s find out, and why it matters.

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[Time Savvy]: 5 Ways to Minimize Distractions Through Automation, EP: 715 May 26, 2022

You can do all the careful planning you want, and set goals for your time. But you can still get distracted and fritter the time you so thoughtfully planned away faster than rice through a colander. Today, I’m sharing 5 ways to automate some guardrails around your own attention, by tweaking your tech settings.

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[Time Savvy]: Understanding–and Overcoming–Time Poverty, EP: 714 May 25, 2022

Do you regularly feel like there just aren't enough hours in the day? That feeling has a technical term--it's called 'time poverty,' and it's something we're going to learn how to reduce in today's episode.

I'm talking with Ashley Whillans, assistant professor at Harvard Business School, a leading voice in time and happiness research, and the author of the excellent book, Time Smart. I enjoyed this book so much--it's succinct, it's practical, it's educational. I turned down multiple corners of multiple pages and got out my special notebook so I could do the exercise Ashley outlines. I really recommend it, and I'm so excited to have Ashely here today to help us all feel more time affluent.

Ashley's website

Ashley's book, 'Time Smart'

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[Time Savvy]: The Benefits of Not Being a Task-Master. EP: 713 May 24, 2022

It’s really common to pride yourself on your ability to get things done. We live in a capitalist society, after all, where productivity and output are kings. BUT, today I’m advocating a switch from letting your to-do list dictate how you spend your time, to letting how much time you have determine which things you’ll do.

This is especially helpful if time is something that always seems to be running out on you.

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[Time Savvy]: Feel Less Time-Crunched with This Psychological Technique, Ep. 712 May 23, 2022

How often do you think something along the lines of, “there just aren’t enough hours in the day”? Well, good news, today I’m sharing a really powerful tool for finding more time for the things you value and enjoy–even, especially if you have a big-time sucker in your life, like a long commute, a caregiving role, or something else that feels like robs of your time to do what you want and need to do on the regular.

It’s part of a week of episodes on becoming more time savvy. Something I for the most part do NOT feel.

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[Podcasting]: How Podcasting Is Like a Personal Development Seminar, EP: 711 May 20, 2022

I’m sharing ways that committing to a creative endeavor – including, but not limited to, hosting a podcast – is like a personal development seminar by sharing the specific ways producing over 700 episodes of this podcast has helped me grow as a person.

If you’re dreaming of starting a podcast or putting any kind of creative work out in the world, I hope that hearing these things will help you take the plunge–or even if you don’t need to learn these same lessons, that hearing this list will help you realize that sharing your voice in some way can help you work with whatever areas of growth are waiting for you.

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[Podcasting]: Podcasting Resources for Listeners and Creators, EP: 710 May 19, 2022

Are you ready to discover some new podcasts? Or are you thinking about starting your own podcast? Either way, you’re in the right place, because I’ve got some resources to share with you today!

Here are your links:

Earbuds Podcast Collective

Good Pods

Death, Sex, and Money

@arithisandthat

Podcast Monetization Secrets

Good Morning, Podcasters

@tannerhelps

LibSyn

$109 mic (on Amazon)

Sound Advice Strategies

Squadcast

@katehanleyauthor

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[Podcasting]: Can Podcasts Make You a Better Person? EP: 709 May 18, 2022

Why are podcasts such a big thing? And can listening to them–and/or creating them–make you a better person? These questions are what we’re going to dig into today, and so much more (like how to find new podcasts to listen to and what to think about if you’re starting to dream about starting one). Who can help us cover all these topics? Arielle Nissenblatt, founder of Earbuds Podcast Collective and community specialist at the podcasting platform, SquadCast. Arielle is like the Pied Piper of the podcasting community, especially on Twitter, where she shares tons of great ideas and tips for listeners and creators alike. I try not to fangirl, but I was nervous!

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[Podcasting]: How I Manage to Come Up With 5 Ideas Each Week, EP: 708 May 17, 2022

How do you come up with ideas regularly? Not just any ideas, but solid ideas, lots of ‘em, and on a schedule? That is exactly the lesson I have been learning and integrating since starting this podcast in the fall of 2019, and what I’ve learned about it is exactly what I’ll be sharing with you today--specifically, the four places I regularly find inspiration, as well as what I’ve learned about taking those ideas out of my head and getting them out into the world.

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[Podcasting]: Why I Started Podcasting Vs. Why I’m Sticking With It, 700+ Episodes In. EP: 707 May 16, 2022

Why does someone decide to start a podcast? And why does that person stay committed once the novelty has worn off? I’m answering both of those questions today, as part of a week of episodes on the act and art of podcasting itself.

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[Health/Moving More]: 5 Secrets to Sticking with Your Exercise Habit, EP: 706 May 13, 2022

There are two really hard parts of building a regular movement habit–starting it, and sticking with it. Today, we’re talking about how to keep going with it once you’ve broken the seal, and how to get back on track when you inevitably fall off.

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[Health/Moving More]: How to Find the Time to Exercise, EP: 705 May 12, 2022

OK, so you’re convinced that it’s time for you to move more, if only you can find the time. That’s what you’ll learn how to do in today’s episode.

So today I’m sharing some helpful questions to ask yourself that can help move you from thinking about exercising, to actually doing it.

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[Health/Moving More]: Why 99% of Excuses For Not Exercising Are B.S. EP: 704 May 11, 2022

Today I’m talking with Forrest Kolaski, my personal trainer, whom I’ve been working out with for about four years, for his perspective on how to stop thinking that you should be getting more exercise and start actually doing it.

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[Health/Moving More]: 5 Ways Walking Can Change Your Life. EP: 703 May 10, 2022

Today I’m taking aim at the idea that in order for exercise to count, you have to be wearing spandex and you have to break a sweat, and I’m doing it by shining a light on the life-changing magic of a daily walk.

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[Health/Moving More]: 5 Super-Convincing Reasons Why Movement Is Great Medicine, EP: 702 May 09, 2022

Have you gotten out of the habit of exercising and can’t seem to get motivated to moving again? Well today’s episode can help, because I’m sharing 6 ways that exercise boosts your health that go far, FAR beyond burning calories–which is where I think most of us begin and end in our minds when it comes to reasons for exercising.

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[Attention]: What AREN’T You Paying Attention To? EP: 701 May 06, 2022

A key part of focused attention is shutting out anything that isn’t what you’re choosing to focus on. So it’s only natural that at any given time, there are many things that you aren’t paying attention to. But sometimes, important stuff gets lumped into that group of “things I’m ignoring.” Today, we’re taking a look at what those things are for you.

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[Attention] Attention Reset–One Good Breath, EP: 700 May 05, 2022

You know those moments when your ability to pay attention to any one thing drops out and you feel overwhelmed by everything and it’s just all too much? Today, I’ve got something to help you with that.

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[Attention] Giving Your Brain What It Needs to Focus, EP: 699 May 04, 2022

Today I'm talking with Dr. Michelle Braun, neuropsychologist and author of High Octane Brain, about what parts of the brain are responsible for attention, the difference between attention and focus, the relationship between time and attention, and how to create the condition your brain needs to be able to focus--while still enjoying some good old fashion distraction, too.

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[Attention]: How to Restore Your Ability to Focus, EP: 698 May 03, 2022

There are two kinds of attention--one that we tend to prioritize (and wish we were better at), and one that we tend to judge as bad (or have been told is bad by teachers, parents, and bosses). You need both, because they feed each other. Come find out what type of attention will help improve your focus.

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[Attention]: Attention Is Love, EP: 697 May 02, 2022

What is attention, really? Is it the ability to take in information, or get work done? Well, yes, but it’s so much more than that. And that’s what we’re going to dive into today, in this introduction to a week’s worth of episodes on attention.

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[De-Clutter Your Mind] Bringing Hidden Beliefs to Light (So They Can Stop Running the Show), EP: 696 Apr 29, 2022

Do you ever wonder why you do the things you do? Or why you don’t do the things you don’t do? Your subconscious knows quite a lot about what your unwritten rules (that I call pink elephants--more on that in the episode) are, but you have to do a little digging to get the conscious mind to understand what’s really going on.

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[De-Clutter Your Mind]: Getting Over Over-Pleasing, EP: 695 Apr 28, 2022

When I surveyed listeners, I asked them what they struggled with when it came to being a better person. And so many of them said people-pleasing. Let's talk about how to stop giving a shit about whether other people are happy with you or not. Hahaha, not exactly--you can still care about whether the people in your life are happy, but you can unhook some of those beliefs in your mind that make it seem like their happiness is your responsibility.

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[De-Clutter Your Mind]: Outsmarting Judgment, an Interview with Suzanne Kingsbury, EP: 694 Apr 27, 2022

Today I’m interviewing Suzanne Kingsbury, founder of Gateless Writing, a method of teaching the art and craft of writing that's designed to get you past the gatekeeper of your inner critic (AKA the source of all those judgments you secretly make about others, and yourself). It's hugely important when you're trying to create something, but learning how to work with your inner judge helps in all parts of your life. It helps you be more joyful, innovative, empathetic, and able to connect with others and yourself.

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[De-Clutter Your Mind]: How to Discern and Dispel Festering Energy. EP: 693 Apr 26, 2022

I bet there are all kinds of areas of your life that may be ready for a re-boot. Your home, your relationships, your diet, your exercise routine, your car, your closet… I mean, phew! It’s a lot. A way to get yourself into motion is to figure out where the energy in your life is festering, and then address that one spot. Here's how you do it.

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[De-Clutter Your Mind]: 4 Ways to Get Rid of Negative Thoughts. EP: 692 Apr 25, 2022

If you’re not taking stock of the things you tell yourself on the regular, guess what--you’re going to make the same choices that led you to feeling like you needed that detox and that de-cluttering in the first place.

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[Vitamin Nature]: The Ultimate Act of Resistance–Going Outside. EP: 691 Apr 22, 2022

What’s one of the most radical, life-affirming, helpful things you can do on any given day? That’s what we’re talking about today.

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[Vitamin Nature]: Planting Seeds (Literally and Metaphorically). EP: 690 Apr 21, 2022

It can be hard to feel connected to the magic of the world in the midst of your daily life, but today’s topic can help you have a tangible experience of it. AND it can teach you how to make positive changes in your life, too!

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[Vitamin Nature]: How Gardening Can Rewild Our World–and Yourself. EP: 689 Apr 20, 2022

Today I'm talking with Emily Murphy. Emily is a gardener who is currently rewilding her yard in Northern California. She's also the author of the new book Grow Now, which is beautiful and inspiring and really gets you pumped about thinking about what you're gonna grow in new ways. I'm excited to talk with Emily today because she has an enthusiasm and love for growing that is

totally contagious and inspiring and that ties into personal growth and protecting the Earth that I just know is going to get you pumped about

creating or enhancing the green spaces that you have access to.

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[Vitamin Nature]: 3 Fun Treasure Hunts to Help Motivate You to Get Outside. EP: 688 Apr 19, 2022

Today I’m coming to you with some motivation for getting out of your house and going outside so that Mother Nature can pull you a little closer and give you the hug you didn’t even know you needed. One's a really cool natural phenomenon that doesn't have a word in English, but it does in Japanese! One's something you may not have paid attention to before (although many people are obsessed with it). And one's a really cool app that the whole family can use together.

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[Vitamin Nature]: Can Nature Restore Your Attention? Science Says Yes. EP: 687 Apr 18, 2022

What if there were something that wasn’t a prescription drug that could help you focus better? Well, there is, and it’s completely free with no side effects. It’s nature.

I talk you through some of the science that suggests that being in nature can improve your cognitive abilities and figure out how to put this superpower of nature together.

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[Pump Up Your Partnership] Did COVID Prematurely Age Your Relationship? EP: 686 Apr 15, 2022

COVID brought a heaping helping of stress and uncertainty--two things that can strain even the strongest relationships. It also came with a LOT of together time. Like, way more together time than any couple or throuple or whatever your jam is really ever ought to spend together for such an extended amount of time.

If you're experiencing doubts about your relationship right now, here's how to tell if it's because COVID accelerating the age of your partnership, and what to do about it.

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[Pump Up Your Partnership]: The Key to Fighting Less and Enjoying More. EP: 685 Apr 14, 2022

There’s one thing that I wish I could wave my magic wand and everyone would stop doing in their relationships, and that is keeping score.

I get that women typically do way more of the emotional and the household labor and that it needs to end. BUT, keeping score is not the way out. If it were, we'd have made more progress on this front than we have.

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[Pump Up Your Partnership]: Secrets to Great Sex in a Long-Term Relationship. EP: 684 Apr 13, 2022

We all know that the initial rush of a new relationship wanes. But does that mean that if you're in a long-term relationship your sex life has no choice but to fizzle out? No. Today's guest is Dr. Stephen Snyder, author of Love Worth Making and a sex therapist in NYC who has some awesome news and practical, doable, fun tips to help you enjoy and foster that physical connection to your partner--even if you're lazy, don't have time, or feel too tired for sex.

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[Pump Up Your Partnership] Fights Are Natural. It’s What You Do After That Matters. EP: 683 Apr 12, 2022

I’m coming to you today with a tip on how to keep your relationship strong even when there’s been some disturbance in the force.

There’s a key to making sure that your fights end positively, and it’s something I was never taught–and that I think a lot of us have never been taught–and it has been a game-changer for me.

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[Pump Up Your Partnership]: The Trick to Getting Less Annoyed. EP: 682 Apr 11, 2022

What if the things that your partner does that drive you crazy suddenly didn’t annoy you so much anymore? Because we all have things about our partner that make us nuts. Today’s big idea is that the flip side of the things that initially draw you to someone and that you value about them the most is often exactly what drives you the craziest. It’s the yin and yang of life--the very thing that draws you to someone is also the thing that repels you.

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[TLC for Your Body]: One Bombshell Beverage, Infinite Benefits and Tastes. EP: 681 Apr 08, 2022

Listen, full confession, I’m not a coffee drinker. I just don’t like the way it tastes and I’m convinced it’s genetic because my dad doesn’t like it either. But I’m not here to bash coffee. If you drink it, keep drinking it! It has a lot of health benefits too, particularly in regards to protecting you from developing fatty liver disease. I’m just saying, GIVE TEA A CHANCE. Green tea, especially, which is just ridiculously good for you, as well as herbal teas. Which are technically called 'tisanes'--now you know!

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[TLC for Your Body]: Feast Your Eyes on This: EP: 680 Apr 07, 2022

Sunlight is basically a healing tonic for your physiology. Yes, you can overdo it and get sunburned, but that’s no reason to avoid this omnipresent part of life that is vital nourishment for your eyes, brain, and entire embodiment. Can't sleep? Immunity in need of a boost? Mood not where you'd like it to be? Just feeling off in general? Sunlight can help!

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[TLC for Your Body]: You Are Now Entering the Relaxation Zone. EP: 679 Apr 06, 2022

Getting yourself into a truly relaxed state is like taking your car in for a tune-up and having an amazing therapy session all in one great-feeling package. The only kicker is, it takes a little effort. You’re not just going to magically achieve a physiological state of relaxation by doing the things you think you’re doing to help you relax, whether that’s watching your favorite show or having a glass of wine. In this episode, I share 4 different ways to woo true relaxation.

Here's a link to an article where I talk about constructive rest and how to do it.

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[TLC for Your Body]: The Amazing Healing Powers of Cuddling. EP: 678 Apr 05, 2022

Cuddling or snuggling does more than just feel nice--it bathes your cells in oxytocin, the so-called love hormone that does incredible things for your body. And that also, sadly, declines with aging. Here's a pep talk for making time for physical contact, as well as four ways to boost oxytocin that doesn't require another person. Prepare to feel the love!

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[TLC for Your Body]: Love Is in the (Fresh) Air. EP: 677 Apr 04, 2022

Which is cleaner--indoor air, or outdoor air? The answer might surprise you. (It surprised me!) After I share with you why the answer is what it is, I think you'll be excited to remedy the situation--and breathe in the benefits.

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[Am I a Bad Person?]: The Things We Feel Shame About. EP: 676 Apr 01, 2022

So very many of us have experienced something that makes us feel ashamed. Something that we’re scared that if people knew the truth about, we would be judged and shunned for. And that shame can worm its way into your subconscious and make you feel like deep down inside, you are a bad person.

In today's replay episode (it originally aired in August, 2021), I talk about how to start rewriting the internal narrative that says because this thing happened, it means you're a bad person. Prepare to feel lighter.

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[Am I a Bad Person?]: Why Can’t I Stick With My Healthy Habits? I Know Why: I Suck. EP: 675 Mar 31, 2022

It feels so awesome when you adopt a new healthy habit--whether that's cleaning up your diet, moving our body more, meditating, what have you. And it feels equally as bad when you let that habit slide. Which, we all do.

Does it mean we suck? Just aren't meant to be that virtuous and healthy?

In today's replay episode (it originally aired in August, 2021), I talk about how to pull out of the shame spiral.

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[Am I a Bad Person?]: Does Lying Make You a Bad Person? EP: 674 Mar 30, 2022

Whether you’re telling a little fib, or blatantly telling someone something that isn’t true, or even NOT telling someone something that IS true, dishonesty is often one of those things that triggers a visit from the “am I a bad person?” thought pattern later on.

In today's replay episode (it originally aired in August, 2021), I break it down with honesty expert--and close personal friend--Judi Ketteler, author of the "book Would I Lie to You?"

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[Am I a Bad Person?]: I’m Always Late and Forgetting Stuff--Am I a Bad. EP: 673 Mar 29, 2022

There are thousands of articles, etiquette experts, friends, and family members who will tell you that being late is disrespectful--in other words, something that contributes to making you a bad person.

I ask: Is it though?

In today's replay episode (originally aired in August 2021) we take a deep look at what it says about you if you're always running late and forgetting stuff and therefore, potentially letting other people down. Let me just say, I FEEL this one.

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[Am I a Bad Person?]: Are You a Bad Person If You’re Impatient? EP: 672 Mar 28, 2022

I'm taking a week off from producing new content and replaying one of my favorite series of last year, where I flipped things around and, instead of talking about being a better person, took a look at the things we ALL sometimes do that can leave us wondering, am I a bad person?

Today's episode is the number one thing listeners told me makes them feel like a bad person: impatience.

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[Trusting Yourself]: A New Way to Think About Doubt. EP: 671 Mar 25, 2022

Doubt is something that is always going to crop up from time to time. And when those doubts come in–well, it can feel like torture. It’s an open invitation for your inner critic to go hog wild. And it can also feel like a sign that you ought to stop. A very clear, blinking, neon sign that means "DON'T DO IT!"

I have another way to view it.

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[Trusting Yourself]: Reading Your Body’s Signals. EP: 670 Mar 24, 2022

Your inner wisdom lives in your body, whether you call it a feeling in your bones or a gut feeling or something you know all the way down to your toes. The more we learn about the gut the more science recognizes it as a second brain, with more than 100 million neurons spread throughout the digestive tract. That’s a lot of processing power that we overlook when we try to only cogitate our way through something.

And we’re never really taught how to understand the signals our body – aka our gut – is sending out. And that’s a real loss because while analytical or critical thinking is not bad, it’s just not the only game in town. Let's make today the day this starts to change.

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[Trusting Yourself]: Need Advice? Ask Your Muse. EP: 669 Mar 23, 2022

Today I'm interviewing award winning book coach Lisa Tener. Why am I interviewing a book coach during Trust Yourself week? Well, a lot of people think writing a book is strictly an intellectual pursuit, but it's also so much about being able to access your creativity and trusting yourself and your message. Lisa has a signature process that she walks her clients through called Meet Your Muse, and it's basically an opportunity to have a conversation with the wisest, most inspired part of yourself. In this episode, Lisa talks me through it and you get to meet my very cute and little muse.

And if you'd like to experience the process directly for yourself, here's the link where you can Meet Your Muse.

Check out Lisa's The Joy of Writing Journal.

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[Trusting Yourself]: Making Decisions from Your Heart. EP: 668 Mar 22, 2022

There are two basic forces in the world – fear, and love. And with our negativity bias–the tendency of our brains to focus more on things that didn’t work out or that cause pain than on the things that go well and lift us up–we place way too much of our focus on fear. This exercise helps give love more of a voice the next time you're facing a decision.

I offer a nicely designed PDF version of today's exercise on my website. Click here to download it (scroll to the bottom of the page, pop in your email address, and click the "I want clarity" button).

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[Trusting Yourself]: Is It Your Gut, or Is It Fear? EP: 667 Mar 21, 2022

Every single one of us has a wise part of ourselves that always has our best interests at heart and that can process all kinds of information and feelings and sensation that our thinking mind can only barely start to perceive. That wise part is your intuition or your gut, and developing a relationship with it is a crucial piece of trusting yourself.

The problem is that it’s an internal voice and frankly, we have a lot of internal voices, and not all of them are all that helpful. So in order to be able to start building a tighter relationship with your intuition, it’s really helpful to figure out how to tell the difference between your gut, and your fear.

In this episode, I share some key differences between the two voices so that you can recognize more easily when you’ve gotten hooked by fear, and pay more attention to the messages that are coming from your intuition.

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Life Admin]: To Get Better at Adulting You Must Make Peace with This Paradox. EP: 666 Mar 18, 2022

Today’s big idea is that there is a balance that you’ve got to strike in order to improve your relationship to life admin.

And that is to make peace with the fact that while the human brain loves to close open loops–and cross things off the to-do list–it’s also true that there will always, always be more do on the adulting front. So you can't let your peace of mind depend on how many things are left on your to-do list. Here's some insight on to how to make peace between doing, and never being done.

Contribute your tips and successes to the Life Admin Tipsheet!

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[Life Admin]: 3 Secrets to Making Life Admin Less Overwhelming. EP: 665 Mar 17, 2022

Today’s big is actually three ideas for making life admin less overwhelming. These are mindset shifts that will help you think about adulting differently--a key step in making it all feel a little less relentless.

Contribute your tips and successes to the Life Admin Tipsheet!

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[Life Admin]: Life Admin Secrets from a Professional Organizer. EP: 664 Mar 16, 2022

Frankly, life admin just makes me want to lie down. Which is why I’m excited to be interviewing my friend, Jessica Tudos, a mindful organizer based in Toronto whom I always love talking to about how to get a grip on the many facets of life while still respecting things like creativity and being moved by inspiration and having a lot of things going on because you’re genuinely interested in a lot of things–something Jessica calls being multi-passionate. In today's episode, Jessica dishes up how she keeps all the details of life contained, and how you can do it, too, in a way that suits your personality and your life. I learned a ton!

Contribute your tips and successes to the Life Admin Tipsheet!

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[Life Admin]: Never Forget to Make an Appointment Again. EP: 663 Mar 15, 2022

Scheduling is one of my VERY LEAST favorite life admin tasks. Am I the only one with an allergy to planning for something that's not related to having fun? Today’s big idea is my very best tip to make sure that you have the majority of the appointments that you, your pet, and your family needs with next to no effort on your part.

Contribute your tips and successes to the Life Admin Tipsheet!

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[Life Admin]: Adulting Can Feel Relentless; Here’s How to Contain It. EP: 662 Mar 14, 2022

This week on the podcast I’m talking about how to take better care of all the details of life–making appointments, paying bills, prepping your taxes, keeping your paperwork up to date, your car maintenanced, your communication handled, etc., etc., etc. In other words, I’m talking about adulting. And when I went to research this topic I realized it had a very technical sounding name: life admin.

Which simultaneously made me feel a mixture of grief and relief--a simultaneous feeling of, no wonder I’ve been feeling the way that I have, and, dang, I guess this is really a thing that must be reckoned with. Let's do it, together.

Contribute your tips and successes to the Life Admin Tipsheet!

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[Tending to Your Energy]: How to Read Other People’s Energy. EP: 661 Mar 11, 2022

Some people are more empathetic and/or sensitive and so they get an intuitive read on other people’s energy without a lot of conscious effort. But everyone can get better at reading other people’s energy with a little practice. In this episode, I share four things to assess--because you deserve to be around people who make you feel good!

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[Tending to Your Energy]: Energy Vampires and What to Do About Them. EP: 660 Mar 10, 2022

Sadly, and of course, there are some things in life that will bring your energy down. Some of these things come in from the outside, generally from other people, and others generate from within your own mind. Interestingly enough, more come from within than without! Here's how to identify them, and what to do about them.

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[Tending to Your Energy]: 8 Quick Ways to Raise Your Vibe. EP: 659 Mar 09, 2022

Your energy isn't set it and forget it. There are simple things you can do to raise it up. Here are my favorite 8 ways--which one will you try so you can conduct your own energy experiment?

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[Tending to Your Energy]: Figure Out What Raises Your Energy (and What Squashes It). EP: 658 Mar 08, 2022

Today’s big idea is that figuring out what raises your energy and what squashes it is a crucial part of being able to take care of yourself and your overall energy. I call it doing an energy audit, which sounds very official, doesn’t it? Like someone’s going to come to your house wearing a hard hat and carrying a clipboard? Don’t worry, it’s not like that.

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[Tending to Your Energy]: When I Say Energy, I Don’t Mean ‘Pep’. EP: 657 Mar 07, 2022

Most people when they think of energy as something that a person has, they’re thinking about stamina or strength. Or what my grandmother used to call ‘pep’. And if you have a lot of it, you’re like the Energizer bunny, and if you don’t, you need a nap.

But energy is a definite personal resource that is about more than your ‘get up and go.’ It's something you can take care of, and it will take care of you, and help draw people and opportunities to you that are an energetic match. Today we start to raise your awareness of what kind of vibe you have.

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[Animal Week!] 3 Easy Ways to Help Birds. EP: 656 Mar 04, 2022

Since 1970, North America has lost nearly 3 billion birds. 3 billion!! This is a problem because birds do so many important things – they eat pests, pollinate plants, disperse seeds, and protect ecosystems. They’re also direct descendants of the dinosaurs–they are living proof of life’s resilience and if they are dying in droves, it really doesn’t bode well for the rest of us. So let’s talk about some simple things you can do to help our feathered friends.

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[Animal Week!] 3 Garden Hacks that Protect Pollinators. EP: 655 Mar 03, 2022

A category of animals that really needs our support is pollinators–the butterflies, bees, hummingbirds, moths and even bats—that spread pollen from plant to plant and make it so those plants can flower and fruit.

Approximately 35% of our food crops and more than 75% of all flowering plants depend on pollinators. You may have heard that honeybees and monarch butterflies–two of many important pollinators–are in trouble and vulnerable to massive die-offs. They are not the only ones. Now that it's time to start dreaming of the plants you're going to plant this year, here are three easy gardening things to do to help our plants, pollinators, and food supply thrive.

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[Animal Week!]: Life Lessons from an Animal Sanctuary. EP: 654 Mar 02, 2022

For Jodi Helmer, it all started by adopting a rescue dog. That led to fostering other dogs in order to help them get adopted. That led to a move to the country in order to have more space. That led to taking in one very naughty donkey who was running out of a time at a kill shelter. And now, Jodi and her husband Jerry are caring for 48 rescued animals and are running a non-profit animal sanctuary.

In honor of animal week, I interviewed Jodi about what rescuing animals has taught her about herself and life in general, why animal sanctuaries are so incredibly needed, and how you can support this important work without opening your home to 48 animals.

Naughty Donkey Farm Sanctuary website

Naughty Donkey Farm Sanctuary Instagram

Naughty Donkey Farm Sanctuary Facebook page

Jodi's books on gardening, farming, and living green

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[Animal Week!]: 3 Ways to Interact with Animals Without Getting a Pet. EP: 653 Mar 01, 2022

Maybe your kid is begging you for a pet but it's not in the cards. Maybe you really want a pet but the landlord doesn't allow it. Maybe you're just not sure. Luckily, there are many ways to develop loving bonds with animals that don't require becoming a pet parent!

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[Animal Week!]:3 Ways Having a Pet Makes You a Better Person. EP: 652 Feb 28, 2022

Why am I talking about animals on a show about being a better person? Animals can really bring out our better instincts and give us an opportunity to get out of our own heads, thinking about our own problems. Plus, they're cute. And I think late winter is prime time for a little cute infusion when our spirits could go for some lifting.

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[Quick Hits]: Assume the Best About Others. EP: 651 Feb 25, 2022

You may not think that you’re making negative assumptions about other people–after all, most of us know that to assume makes an “ass” out of “u” and “me. But, trust me, your brain is filling in a lot of blanks about the people you encounter every day, and probably in a fairly ungenerous and judgmental way.

Today's quick-hit helps with that--and also helps increase your capacity for love. Not bad, right?

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[Quick Hits]: Say “Thank You” for Things You Normally Wouldn't. EP: 650 Feb 24, 2022

Saying thank you is about more than being polite--it's about training yourself to look for the good, even in situations that are otherwise neutral or even negative. It helps you re-wire your brain, which is trained to look for and remember the bad.

Enjoying these episodes? Leave me a tip! All proceeds used to offset production costs and create more episodes. :)

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[Quick Hits]: Ask Someone How They’re Doing in a Way that Elicits More than ‘Fine’. EP: 649 Feb 23, 2022

Say you’re checking out at the grocery store, or picking up books from the library, or getting dinner delivered, or actually eating out in a restaurant. It’s pretty automatic to say, “how are you?” to the person who is helping you. And then they say ‘Fine, how are you?” And these kinds of pleasantries are more important than they might seem. But they don’t really require a stretch. And sometimes we have to try in order to be a better person.

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[Quick Hits]: Let Someone Else Go First. EP:648 Feb 22, 2022

When you’re in a hurry it’s easy to wish everyone would just get out of your way already. You know, it’s a real “me first” state of mind. “Please step to the side so that I may get to my very important destination!”

Today's quick hit can help you pull yourself out of that subconscious way of thinking, and potentially even make someone else's day (which feels just as good to you as it does to them).

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[Quick Hits]: Look Someone in the Eye. EP:647 Feb 21, 2022

This week I’m sharing really quick, concrete things you can do to act on the desire to be a better person. I love to talk about deeper, bigger stuff, and figuring out how to make long-lasting changes. But sometimes, you just need a quick hit. That’s what the episodes this week are all about.

Today’s quick hit is to look people in the eye. This may seem like no big deal, or like it doesn’t have anything to do with being a better person. But hear me out.

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[Re-Imagining Work]: Listen to Your Laziness. EP:646 Feb 18, 2022

Laziness gets completely frowned upon in our productivity focused society. But you could have a very good reason to be feeling–or being perceived–as lazy. AND that feeling of not wanting to do anything–which, I fully admit, I have been feeling so frequently lately–is likely telling you something really important. Let's see what laziness has to say.

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[Re-Imagining Work]: Tend to Your Network. EP: 645 Feb 17, 2022

Your network isn’t some wall of trophies that you can proudly point to. It’s your support system--the net beneath your trapeze AND the slingshot that can help launch you higher or in a different direction than you could go on your own. And most likely, the last two years of working remotely and hunkering down hasn't exactly been great for strengthening this web. Let's fix that.

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[Re-Imagining Work]: Things to Consider Before You Quit Your Job. EP: 644 Feb 16, 2022

Today I'm talking with Damon Brown, author of the brand new book Career Remix: Get the Gig You Want with the Skills You've Got about the things you should consider before you up and quit your job. Even if you’re NOT currently secretly–or not so secretly–fantasizing about heading off for greener pastures, thinking about these things will help you improve your relationship to the work you do and understand exactly what it is you have to offer, and what you stand to gain.

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[Re-Imagining Work]: Making Space for Mental Health at the Office. EP: 643 Feb 15, 2022

Something so very many of us has experienced during this pandemic is challenges to mental health. And in general, we've gotten a lot more open about sharing our mental health struggles with others. How does this impact our work lives? How can we make space for mental health while still taking care of business? Let's talk about it.

I also answer a question from listener Nina. If you have questions you'd like me to address in a future episode, email me at kate at katehanley dot com.

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[Re-Imagining Work]: Let’s Challenge the Culture of Overwork. EP: 642 Feb 14, 2022

This week on the podcast is all about re-imagining work. After all, like the rest of our lives, much of our work lives have been upended since the pandemic started. Whether that’s the physical location of where you’re doing your work, or how stressful your work has been, what’s clear is that work is not the same as it was in 2019. So let’s take this opportunity to figure out where we want it to go from here, both for yourself as an individual and for our society as a whole.

No big deal!

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[Being There for Others]: A Crucial Thing to Keep in Mind in Order to Be Truly Helpful. EP: 641 Feb 11, 2022

Wanting to help someone who’s in need of support is honorable. But what it ISN’T, is about you. You are not the solution for their problems, nor is it your full responsibility to solve anyone’s problems.

I think this is another reason why we sometimes resist reaching out to someone in need of help–we fear that we won’t actually be able to help, or that we might get overwhelmed by the amount of help they need.

I share a helpful analogy that can help get your head on straight about what your ultimate goal is.

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[Being There for Others]: Signs Someone Might Be Struggling. EP: 640 Feb 10, 2022

One of the beneficial roles we can play as someone’s friend or loved one is to notice them. Not judge them, or rate their appearance, but just take in their presence.

In this episode, I’ll share some common signs that someone might be having a hard time with life.

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[Being There for Others]: What NOT to Say to an Anxious Person. EP: 639 Feb 09, 2022

There are so many people who run anxious, and you likely have many of them in your life. Maybe they are a family member or a dear friend. A lot of the things that we say to people when they’re in the throes of anxiety may be well-intentioned, but ultimately not that helpful. Today, I'm talking with Dr. Susan Bernstein who'll help us take a look at those common, unhelpful things, and figure out what to say instead.

Susan has an MBA and also has a Ph.D. in somatic psychology, so her expertise really covers the gamut of the mind, the body, and the heart. She’s also just a lovely person whom I’ve been connected to for coming up on two decades–all because she responded to one of my email newsletters. You are going to love her.

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[Being There for Others]: 3 Helpful Questions to Ask. EP: 638 Feb 08, 2022

Here are three questions you can keep in your back pocket that will make it super easy to check in with someone. This way, you won’t be at a loss for words–which is a big reason why we may be tempted to stay away when someone we know or love is going through something hard. I know you don’t want to say the wrong thing--so say these things instead.

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[Being There for Others]: The Surprising Power of Bearing Witness. EP: 637 Feb 07, 2022

This week on the podcast I’m talking about how to be there for the folks in your life who are going through it–whatever it may be. The blues, anxiety, stress, illness, family stuff are all normal parts of life and we all get by with a little help from our friends (or family members, or neighbors). But just because it takes a village, it doesn’t mean that we automatically know how to be a helpful village person!

Today’s big idea is that when someone you know and maybe love is facing something tough, it’s easy to want to help, but not so easy to know HOW to do that, exactly. Let's talk about the very most important--and powerful--thing you can do.

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5 Unexpected Ways to Interact with Art Without Leaving Home. EP: 636 Feb 04, 2022

You don’t have to drag your butt to a museum in order to interact with artwork. You can do it from home in ways that maybe you never thought of or that you might think don’t count, but they DO! They absolutely do. And, bonus, they’re pandemic-friendly!

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7 Easy Ways to Read More. EP: 635 Feb 03, 2022

Today’s big idea is actually 7 ideas–I’m sharing 7 easy ways to read more. Including some cool ways to use audio books, and permission to do something that some people think makes them a bad person, or at least a bad reader.

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The Healing Power of Reading. EP: 634 Feb 02, 2022

Today I’m talking to Becky Karush. Becky is the founder of Read to Me Literary Arts, where she hosts group writing salons–which I attend and am devoted to–and coaches writers individually. She is also the host of the wonderful Read to Me podcast. Becky is going to get you SO EXCITED to read–and she gives some great ideas on how to make time for reading, too.

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[Engaging with the Arts]: 5 Books That Helped Me Become a Better Person in 2021. EP: 633 Feb 01, 2022

Today I'm sharing the 5 books that I read in 2021 that I really feel helped me a better person because they helped me see something in a new way, or expanded my empathy toward others, or what have you. I loved these books! And am excited to share them with you.

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[Engaging with the Arts]: Can Art Make You a Better Person? EP: 632 Jan 31, 2022

During this pandemic January, when the nights have been long and the news has been bleak, I’ve been extra aware that what so many of us turn to when times are hard is art. Whether that’s shows or movies, books, music, actual art work or another form of creative expression, art is what helps us get through.

This week on the podcast I’m talking about how to consume art as a means to being a better person–and just feeling better about the world and your place in it.

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[Let's Talk Drinking, Again]: Non-Alcoholic Ways to Take the Edge Off. EP: 631 Jan 28, 2022

Nothing says 'ahhh' like cracking a cold one or pouring a glass of wine. Or does it??

I’ve got three ways to help yourself switch into chill mode without having a drink--I'm thinking one of these will be a helpful alternative for you.

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[Let's Talk Drinking, Again]: How to Have Fun Without Alcohol. EP: 630 Jan 27, 2022

One of the main reasons we turn to alcohol is to help us let our hair down--to laugh a little more easily, to be a little more uninhibited, to be more fun. BUT, having a drink is not the only way to loosen up and have fun!

Let’s talk about other ways to take an oil can to the creaky spots in your psyche without relying on a glass of something to provide it for you.

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[Let's Talk Drinking, Again]: Is My Drinking Problematic? How to Tell. EP: 629 Jan 26, 2022

In this re-broadcast, I interview Michelle Smith, a TEDx speaker, author, podcaster, mental health and addictions counselor and founder of Recovery is the New Black, about how to tell if your drinking has become unhelpful, or maybe even harmful. Come hear why Michelle says that the opposite of addiction is connection, and why she's having more fun as a sober person than she's ever had before. (This episode is not all doom and gloom, as the title might suggest!)

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[Let's Talk About Drinking, Again]: What's the Deal with Women and Alcohol? EP: 628 Jan 25, 2022

In this re-airing of an interview I did with Sarah Kate of Some Good Clean Fun, we explore why alcohol is so heavily marketed to women, why drinking less is a rebellious choice in our society, and why alcohol is a feminist issue. Don't worry, we don't get strident. :) It's just that, you think AA and you think schlubby dudes in a basement. Just like with medical care, women have their own unique experience of alcohol and it's time we talked about it!

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[Let's Talk About Drinking, Again]: What Is Sober Curious? EP: 627 Jan 24, 2022

I'm taking a week off from new episodes this week and re-airing a series I did last summer on re-thinking drinking. It is, after all, Dry January--in other words, a natural time to be thinking about drinking less, or not at all.

This week, let’s just see what’s ready to be seen in terms of our relationship to alcohol. I am NOT here to preach or proselytize, I promise! This is a judgment-free zone!! Let's just take a look, together.

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[Being of Service]:CAN You Give From an Empty Cup? Balancing Self-Care with Helping Others. EP: 626 Jan 21, 2022

You've heard the advice to put on your own oxygen mask first, and that you can't give from an empty cup (I've said this myself many times, including on this podcast). But I've been re-thinking this. Because, first of all, you don't have to have your shit together in order to help someone else. And second, being of service raises your own energy. So how do you balance self-care with helping others? It's kind of like making a smoothie.

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[Being of Service]: How to Ensure that You’re Actually Helping (Hint–Think Less, Listen More). EP: 625 Jan 20, 2022

Even though wanting to be of service seems like a noble idea, it’s pretty easy to have an attitude that makes you more of a pain in the butt than an actual source of help. Here are three ways of thinking that are going to block you from actually helping--and a different goal to keep top of mind when seek to be of service.

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[Being of Service}: Cultivating Courageousness with Rabbi Daniel Cohen. EP: 624 Jan 19, 2022

Today I’m talking with Rabbi Daniel Cohen, who serves at the largest modern orthodox synagogue in New England in Stamford, CT. He’s the author of "What Will They Say About You When You Are Gone? Cultivating a Life of Legacy." He has been a rabbi for over 30 years, meaning he’s had hundreds of end of life conversations and delivered thousands of eulogies which gives him a unique perspective on life.

I wanted to talk with Rabbi Cohen about how to find the courage to shift your comfort zone to include standing up for what you know to be right, and to expand your tolerance for risk in a way that inspires you to step up and be of service.

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[Being of Service]: Finding Your Lane So That Service Doesn’t Deplete You. EP: 623 Jan 18, 2022

There are SO many people and causes that are in need of help that it can be overwhelming, trying to decide how to give back without overextending yourself. If you get involved in every cause or try to help every person that needs it, it’s easy to end up getting overwhelmed and not actually being that much help.

Today I’m sharing a strategy I’ve learned that makes giving back easier–so that you can do it in a way that lifts you up instead of wears you down.

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[Being of Service]: Helping Others Isn’t Just a Noble Thing to Do–It Helps You Too. EP: 622 Jan 17, 2022

Being of service isn’t just a noble thing to do, or something to tick off on a list of things that make you a better person. It’s actually beneficial to you too, primarily because it gets you into a higher level of energy. Not energy as in what my grandmother used to call pep, but energy as in your vibe and how you show up in the world.

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[Stay Cozy]: Is Your Comfort Zone Truly Comfortable–Or Have You Just Gotten Used to It? EP: 621 Jan 14, 2022

Warning: Deep thoughts about comfort zones ahead! In which I argue that maybe what you've become comfortable with isn't actually all that comfortable--it's just familiar. And how making changes that make SEEM like they're taking you out of your comfort zone are actually leading you to someplace where you are truly at ease. (And how to deal with the discomfort of the unfamiliar while your comfort zone recalibrates.)

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[Stay Cozy]: If I Get Too Cozy, Isn’t That a Bad Thing? EP: 620 Jan 13, 2022

In addition to upping the cozy factor in your home and in your body–as I covered in the previous two episodes–seeking coziness and comfort is also worthy goals when it comes to making life decisions, like what you do for work and where, who you’re in a relationship with, and where you live.

Which flies in the face of most conventional advice, which says that you have to leave your comfort zone if you want to have a fulfilling life. So let’s break this down a bit.

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[Stay Cozy]: 5 Quick Hacks to Keep Your BODY Cozy. EP: 619 Jan 12, 2022

You don't always have control over your environment, but you do have say over what goes on your body. Today I'm sharing my top 5 ways to keep yourself cozy as a baby lamb snuggled up to its mama, no matter where you are. As my favorite pin says, "Cozy does it."

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[Stay Cozy]: 5 Hacks to Make Your Space Cozier. EP: 618 Jan 11, 2022

Environment is such a big piece of your wellbeing. It’s definitely worth taking a little time to set up your space for a little extra coziness. I promise these ideas are inexpensive and you likely already have things on hand that will help you execute them.

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[Stay Cozy] The Surprisingly Deep Reason Why Feeling Cozy Matters, EP: 617 Jan 10, 2022

This week on the podcast is all about finding comfort and coziness. It’s just the time of year–and that time in the world at large as we round the corner on 2 years of a pandemic with a spike in cases. Let’s use this s-h-i-t show as an opportunity to embrace feeling cozy, whaddya say?

Today’s big idea is that seeking coziness is more than just a comfort measure–it’s a survival mechanism that boosts all aspects of health.

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3 Steps to Post-Holiday Relationship Recovery. EP: 616 Jan 07, 2022

One area of life that is in need of recovery for a lot of people right now, in this first week after the holidays, is your primary relationships. I wrote a blog post called How I Stopped Hating My Husband and You Can Too in 2013, about how I learned how to stop keeping score regarding who did what around the house and how to communicate about how I was feeling about the division of labor. That blog post has consistently been the biggest source of traffic to my blog, but let me tell you, while that traffic remains steady through the year, it spikes around the holidays. Why? Because there’s typically one partner

who is taking on the bulk of the work that the holidays require, and in heterosexual relationships, that partner is typically the woman.

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Recovery Isn't a Straight Line. It's a Doodle. EP: 615 Jan 06, 2022

The problem with recovery is that we tend to think it’s only for certain situations–an addict who has hit rock bottom, for example, or someone who has experienced a major illness or surgery. And then, even in those situations, we expect recovery to happen on a certain schedule and to progress linearly, like an arrow that’s pointing upward and forward.

Today’s big idea is that not only is recovery appropriate in a whole range of situations, including after times of widespread uncertainty, like the one you and I and everyone else on Earth is living through now, but also that it doesn’t happen on a timetable, and it doesn’t follow a straight line.

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Recovery Doesn't Have to Suck. EP: 614 Jan 05, 2022

Today’s big idea is that we have a cultural bias against recovery–because if you’re recovering from something, then something must have been kicking your butt. And we’re not great at tolerating quote-unquote weakness. When the truth is, there are so many good things about being in recovery.

To share some of those good things with us, I’m talking today with Billy Manas, a recovering addict, and author of the book Kickass Recovery. Billy is also a top contributor on Elephant Journal where he writes a lot about addiction, relationships, and mindset. He's also a singer-songwriter who's got a treat for you at the end of the episode.

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The Secret Ingredients to a Successful Recovery. EP: 613 Jan 04, 2022

Today’s big idea is that, once you recognize that you are in a recovery phase–and honestly, who among us hasn’t experienced loss and challenge in these last few years–you will naturally want to do something about that awareness. This episode lays out what that something is--and it's probably not what you'd expect, or that some part of you is going to hear. It's still true!

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I Don’t Know About You, But I’m Ready for Some Recovery. EP: 612 Jan 03, 2022

This week on the podcast I’m talking about recovery. Because after the two years we’ve just had, plus the holidays–which are typically enough on their own to make you feel like you’ve lost touch with the things that make you feel your best–I think a lot of people are ready for some of that action. What I love about the idea of recovery is the re- part–it’s not creating something new that you’re never had before. It’s getting back into the groove, not digging a new trench. And it’s acknowledging that you’re not at 100 percent, so it requires you to cut yourself–and everyone else who’s in recovery–some slack.

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[Un-Do 2022]: Un-Fix Yourself. EP:611 Dec 31, 2021

Today’s anti-resolution is probably the most important of them all. I should have maybe run it on Monday, but for whatever reason, my episodes that drop on Fridays tend to get the most downloads, so here it is: Un-Fix Yourself.

That might seem like a mixed message, coming from a podcast called How to Be a Better Person. Just to be clear, I don’t want you to be a different person. Just to help you be that version of yourself that you know is in there, and that can get overlooked when we’re busy, or stressed, or distracted. It’s not fixing we’re after here. It’s remembering. And growing. And neither of those things are possible when you're focusing on the flaws you want to make go away.

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[Un-Do 2022]: Save Space for Being Bored. EP: 610 Dec 30, 2021

I used to be obsessed with productivity hacks. How could I make better lists so that I got more done in a day? What could I do to promote my focus so that I could produce more? I wasn't seeking ways to find my own flow and do my best work--I was just trying to wring more and more stuff out of my brain and cram more and more things into my schedule. Today's surprising strategy for a better new year is the opposite of all that--AND it can help you do your best thinking and find your groove.

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[Un-Do 2022]: Stop Being Nice. EP: 609 Dec 29, 2021

Today’s anti-resolution is to Stop Being Nice.

Wut?!

Despite the fact that women have been socialized to be nice above all else, it's not actually a very noble goal, as my co-host this week, Terri Trespicio, breaks down today. Does that mean you should go out and let your a-hole flag fly? Or become outright mean? Goodness, no. It just means you set your sights on something different--something that takes a lot less energy than being nice AND that gives you more energy, because it's gratifying.

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[Un-Do 2022]: Unplan Your Life. EP: 608 Dec 28, 2021

Today’s surprising strategy for a better new year is to Un-plan Your Life. Which, depending on how much of a planner you are, may sound like just a completely ludicrous idea. BUT, as this week's co-host, Terri Trespicio, will talk us through--plans change all the time. Multiple times. Especially in our new pandemic reality. (I can’t tell you how many trips I have booked and canceled in the last six months.) And sometimes, even when your plans work out, you've put so much stock in them that you can feel lost now that they're no longer on the horizon. So what do you do instead?

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[Un-Do 2022]: Unsubscribe from the Ideas That Just Aren't True for You. EP: 607 Dec 27, 2021

In honor of the year we just had, and how grueling it has been in terms of stress and uncertainty and the sheer volume of decisions we’ve had to make on a daily basis, I want to approach this new year’s season a little differently.

Instead of reflecting, and setting goals--both of which are great to do and if you love doing ‘em, good for you do NOT let me stop you--I am dedicating this week’s episodes to the theme Un-Do 2022: 5 Surprising Strategies for a Better Year.

I just think we’ve all had enough of “I’ve just gotta do this” or “let’s do this” thinking. Given where we are at this point in time, let’s NOT do. Or rather, let’s UN-do, and make way for a more nuanced and personal path to emerge.

Something else that’s different about this week is that I’ve got a co-host: my good friend Terri Trespicio, author of the brand new book Unfollow Your Passion and my go-to source for advice that flies in the face of conventional wisdom.

First up: Unsubscribe to those sneaky ideas that are gumming up the works in that beautiful brain of yours.

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[Being Present] Ridiculously Simple Posture Adjustment. EP: 606 Dec 24, 2021

Today’s big idea is actually a really tiny little thing that can help you come into the present moment and feel supported. And that really tiny little thing is to bring the soles of your feet to the floor. Seriously, it's a tiny thing with a massive footprint. (SO sorry for that awful pun!)

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[Being Present] Let Yourself Hear Your Body Talk. EP: 605 Dec 23, 2021

Your body is your friend and your passport to being present. Because while your mind can hop all over the place in time--in to the future, back in to the past, into hypothetical situations and daydreams--your body is always. Here. Right. Now. Here's how to meet up with your body and enjoy each other's company in this moment. Sooooo dreamy.

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[Being Present] Listen Up/Do You Hear What I Hear? EP: 604 Dec 22, 2021

Your ears are a portal to the present moment, because listening well is basically meditating. It’s focusing your awareness on one particular point--in this case, what you can hear--and it gets your mind into a quiet and receptive state, which keeps it from running off in to the future or wandering back into the past. Today, you're going to make like a human tape recorder and listen like perhaps you've never listened before! PLUS: some of the things preschoolers hear when they do this exercise.

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[Being Present] Observe/Observation/Be a Formal Observer/There’s Nothing Casual About the Act of Observing. EP" 603 Dec 21, 2021

A great way to settle into the present moment is to focus on your powers of observation. It’s also perfect for observing the winter solstice, which is today! Solstice means “standing still of sun” and on this day it’s like we’re suspended between two realities, of the light going away, and the light coming back. So sitting still and just seeing what you can see is actually a great way to honor this particular moment in time. Let's just see what there is to see, shall we?

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[Being Present] Eat Your Way to More Mindfulness. EP: 602 Dec 20, 2021

Eating is something you do every day. It’s tasty. AND it can be a portal into a calmer state of mind. The catch is, eating probably isn’t going to help you be present unless you decide that you want it to be. Otherwise, you’ll probably revert to just getting the food in your mouth without much thought. ALSO: a story about how I ate mindfully with 500 other people in a theater in New York City.

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[Reduce Holiday Stress]: The Crucial Piece of Any Intention (that Too Many People Neglect). EP: 601 Dec 17, 2021

Setting an intention before you head into any kind of holiday situation, whether that’s a family gathering, or doing some kind of chore, or shopping, or traveling, can help you achieve those twin goals of reducing stress and enjoying more.

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[Holidays that Don’t Suck]: Make Peace with the Doing. EP: 600 Dec 16, 2021

Listen, I get that there is a lot of work that goes into holiday celebrations and it is so natural and tempting to kind of groan your way through them or talk about how you hate them. You may not feel 100% at peace with all the stuff you’ve got to do all the time, but even just remembering that you could choose to accept that this is just part of it can help you get to a place where you’re not hating every minute.

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[Reduce Holiday Stress]: How to Not Let Your Family Drive You Nuts. EP: 599 Dec 15, 2021

Today I want to talk specifically about how to navigate family gatherings. And to help with that, I’m interviewing Amy E. Smith, a life coach and communications specialist who specializes in all things self-worth and confidence. Amy has been on the show before sharing how to enforce a boundary without being a jerk. Her e-workbook is called "Stand Up for Yourself without Being a Dick," so I think you can see right there that she’s given this topic some serious thought--let’s find out what she’s got to share.

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[Reduce Holiday Stress]: What Do You Love About the Holidays? Focus on That. EP:598 Dec 14, 2021

Today’s big idea is that you can really up your enjoyment of the holidays by getting really clear on what it is about them that you love and focusing on those things--and letting everything else recede into the background.

So at this juncture, it’s really helpful to take a moment to remember what the holidays are all about --and to be clear, there are so very many holidays that happen in December and January, I am absolutely not only talking about Christmas.

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[Reduce Holiday Stress] Three Ways to Do Less this Season. EP: 597 Dec 13, 2021

I’ve got a tool for you that will help you figure out what parts of the holiday you want to prioritize and which you might dial back on. It’s a priority-making matrix that I learned as a tool to help you figure out how to maximize your impact and reduce your stress at work, but it’s really cool to use it on your life stuff too. To make your own priority-making matrix, you need a piece of paper and a pen or pencil.

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How to Find the Hidden Meanings of Your Personal Writing. EP: 596 Dec 10, 2021

When you start to look back on your daily writing over time, something really cool happens. You can start to discern patterns and insights that are deeper than your daily concerns. They help you see the arc your life is currently on. You have to do two things to discern these deeper message, which is exactly what I'm sharing today.

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The Only Way I Ever Get Any Writing Done. EP: 595 Dec 09, 2021

There’s nothing that can kick up resistance and self-doubt more quickly for a lot of people than to sit down and pick up a pen or open a blank document.

That’s because your inner critic is going to prick up its ears the second you decide to write something down because writing is THAT POWERFUL. In this episode, I share with you how to zoom past that inner critic and get those fingers flying.

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Writing and Mindfulness--Combine These 2 Tools to Make Friends with Yourself. EP: 594 Dec 08, 2021

Today I'm interviewing Kristin Manieri, a certified mindfulness teacher, host of the excellent podcast "60 Mindful Minutes" and author of several books on mindfulness, including The Mindfulness Journal: Daily Check-in. Kristen shares her insight on why written check-ins are invaluable, as well as how to build the habit of doing them, and what to actually write about when you do them.

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A Three-Minute Writing Prompt for Peaceful Productivity. EP: 593 Dec 07, 2021

While, yes, writing is a great way to get to know yourself better, it can also help you be more productive. And not the whirling dervish, work on a ton of things at once and end the day in an exhausted heap, kind of productivity. But peaceful productivity, where you can get in a zone because you know you’re working on the right thing for the right reason and the right time. Yes, please!

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How You--Yes You--Can Use Writing as a Tool for Personal Growth. EP: 592 Dec 06, 2021

Writing has this mystique, like it’s something only for certain people, and that’s just a darned shame because writing is just a magical, and powerful way to get to know, understand, and even like and appreciate yourself more. It’s a tool that you just don’t want to leave on the table simply because there’s a story in your head that you’re ‘not a writer.’

Today’s big idea is an elemental truth: which is that you ARE a writer. And I've got a quick meditation and writing prompt to help you feel that in your bones (and actually write something cool).

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The Problems with Wellness 4 Its a Slippery Slope to Rigid Thinking. EP: 591 Dec 03, 2021

Consuming wellness content is kinda like that board game for kids Chutes and Ladders. It starts off like a ladder Take these steps to get your health to a better place. It’s cool, you’re learning things, getting ideas, trying them out in your own life, hopefully enjoying some tangible evidence of feeling better.

But you can also be moseying along and then boom, fall down a chute into some pretty hairy spaces. For example, falling pray to conspiracy thinking. Today I look at why that is and how you can keep your wits about you.

More resources:

Maintenance Phase, "The Wellness to QAnon Pipeline"

Conspirituality podcast

Dr. Timothy Caulfield

Abbie Richards

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The Problems with Wellness 3 Its Freaking Expensive. EP: 590 Dec 02, 2021

One of the problems with wellness is that it’s freaking expensive. And for that reason, it’s also elitist. Buying organic, grass-fed, Fair Trade all costs more. Add to that supplements, like omega 3s, and probiotics, and protein powders, organic mattresses and infrared saunas and it's like an exclusive realm only for 1 percenters. Today I'm sharing five FREE and powerful ways to boost your health and helping you think of the money you do spend on your health as a worthy investment instead of chasing the latest fad.

B Breathe

O Open the window

N Get out in nature

E Eat mindfully

S Sleep!

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A Better Barometer of Health than Weight. EP: 589 Dec 01, 2021

This week on the podcast we’re taking a look at some of the aspects of the health world that maybe deserve some re-thinking. And one of those things is weight. Today I’m interviewing Dr. Kara Fitzgerald, a functional medicine doctor, author of the soon-to-be-released book Younger You, and award-winning clinician and researcher who has a cutting-edge and evidence-based way to assess health and reduce the risk of disease that takes weight out of the equation.

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The Problems with Wellness, #2: It’s Shaming EP:588 Nov 30, 2021

The issue with wellness that I’m taking aim at today is that it can be awfully shaming--whether that judgment is coming from your doctor, an article or podcast or book, a friend or loved one, or even yourself. Let's unpack this.

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The Problems with Wellness 1 Its Confusing as Hell. EP: 587 Nov 29, 2021

This week on the podcast I’m taking a look at health and wellness and trying to help you and me and everyone navigate this super important topic that also can be, for lack of a better term, crazy-making. And the first issue I’m taking aim at is the fact that when it comes to health advice, it is confusing as hell. How in the heck can you figure out what's the right way to be healthy??

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The Positive Emotion That's Hiding in Plain Sight, Just Waiting for You to Notice It. EP: 586 Nov 26, 2021

There’s a positive emotion that can help you be happy with what you have and shift out of that mental state where you’re feeling incomplete and like you might need something to fill a hole in your life. It's contentment. Not the "I have the remote, a blanket, and a cup of tea" kind of contentment. That's nice, but this is way deeper. And if you play along, you can feel it by the end of this episode. True story!

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Don't Let Eating Be the Only Reason You Open Your Mouth This Thanksgiving (Or, Why You Want to Share Your Gratitude Out Loud). EP: 585 Nov 25, 2021

Today’s big idea is, no surprise about gratitude. After all, it’s Thanksgiving in the US--essentially a national day of gratitude. But it's about a specific way of sharing your gratitude that's been shown by science to have long-lasting beneficial effects (like, months or even years). Plus, two tiny gratitude stories that are still fueling me.

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Need an Antidote to Cynicism? (Who Doesn't?) Put On Your Wonder Goggles. EP: 584 Nov 24, 2021

Wonder is a positive emotion that has tremendous benefits, in addition to being so much fun to seek. But it’s not something we tend to think about much in the midst of the daily grind. I hope today’s interview will help change that. I’m talking with Andrea Scher, author of the brand new book called Wonder Seeker that is literally wonderful, and has been called a “Beacon of joy in a book.”

Follow Andrea on Instagram

Check out her book

Join her read-along e-course

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Despite What Joe Pesci in ‘Goodfellas’ Thinks, Amusement Is Super Helpful. EP: 583 Nov 23, 2021

You know how in Goodfellas, Joe Pesci gets upset when someone calls him funny and he gets ticked off and says, "Am I clown? Do I amuse you?" all menacingly, like amusement is some kind of offense? Well, it's not. It's actually a SUPER powerful positive emotion and I've got an embarrassing story to tell that I think will help you experience it.

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The Secret to Using Your Emotions to Build You Up (instead of Wear You Out). EP: 582 Nov 22, 2021

Imagine that your emotional wellbeing is a see-saw. On one side are all the negative emotions, and on the other are the positive emotions. We tend to not focus on the positive emotions that much, and that's a darn shame because they have SO MUCH to offer in terms of refilling your well, making you more resilient, and just feeling more alive. Luckily, you can build and broaden your experience of them... and we'll start to unpack how today.

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Real Money Talk: Forgiving Your Financial Mistakes. EP: 581 Nov 19, 2021

We all make financial mistakes. No one has a track record of doing the precisely right thing with their money 100% of the time. It’s really really easy to spend money in ways that don’t pan out the way you’d hoped. It’s also really really easy to beat yourself up about those money mis-steps because you can quantify the mistake. So let's talk about how to forgive yourself for those inevitable mistakes so that you increase your trust in your own ability to handle money.

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Real Money Talk: Get What You Need and Give What You Don’t--for Free (I’m Obsessed). EP: 580 Nov 18, 2021

Spending money isn’t the only way to procure the things you want and need. There are online communities and social networks where people are giving and receiving all kinds of things that have value for free. And one of these are the Buy Nothing groups on Facebook. I am completely obsessed with my local Buy Nothing group. Let me tell you why.

Follow Brittni on Instagram.

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Real Money Talk: Healing Old Money Wounds. EP: 579 Nov 17, 2021

Today, I’m talking with Brittni Sennett, a professional financial planner who helps womxn take a whole self approach to improving their financial lives. Brittni isn’t your typical, buttoned up financial planner and her clients aren’t your typical already wealthy investors. She makes it a point to help womxn reduce their overwhelm and increase their confidence around money, and she’s here today to talk to us about how our painful experiences with money in the past might be holding us back, and how we can heal from them and grow both as people and as managers of our own finances.

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Real Money Talk: The Piece of the Financial Equation Too Many People Forget About. EP: 578 Nov 16, 2021

There are two primary ways to have more money in your pocket--you can spend less, or you can earn more. And far too many of us--particularly women--are focused solely on the “spend less” portion of that equation. Let's change that.

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Real Money Talk: Your Net Worth Is Not Your Self Worth. EP: 577 Nov 15, 2021

I was inspired to make this the first episode of a week of episodes on real money talk because I just this morning had a moment of total money panic. I went to check the balance on our joint account--my spouse and I both pay in equal amounts each month and we use that joint money for our expenses, so it ends up getting spent by the end of every month and replenished at the start of each month. And despite the fact that as I write this it’s only the second week of the month, our account was at $0. Zero dollars!

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Better Person Principle #5: Being better is a choice. EP: 576 Nov 12, 2021

Being a better person isn't a fluke of genetics or good parenting. Everyone has inherent goodness. Everyday, you’re faced with hundreds of decisions, and it’s in those decisions where you have the potential to move toward better.

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Better Person Principle #4: There’s a time and a place for everything. EP: 575 Nov 11, 2021

You don’t have to be a better person ALL the time. And thank goodness for that. Because trying to do anything 100% of the time is a recipe for burnout.

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Better Person Principle #3: There’s an opportunity inside every challenge. EP: 574 Nov 10, 2021

Looking for the opportunity keeps your eyes open to what good things might be trying to emerge. And finding those opportunities is what helps you use the simple act of living your life as a personal development seminar.

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Better Person Principle #2: Awareness is the first step. EP: 573 Nov 09, 2021

ven though it’s a simple concept, awareness is a pretty rare and wonderful thing, like an orchid in a sea of carnations. Because it’s a lot more convenient to not pay attention to stuff--particularly your own stuff. Being able to see yourself clearly is how you start to make better choices. It’s also an easy and effective way to wade into change.

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Better Person Principle #1: It’s not about being perfect, or even good. Just better. EP:572 Nov 08, 2021

You don’t have to transform yourself into Mother Theresa or Gandhi or whomever your ideal ‘good person’ is. Truly, you just have to care enough to opt for a better choice at your next opportunity.

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