Dude, That's F****d Up - TopPodcast.com

E151: Royal Tea Jan 15, 2020

Did you know the Queen of England has a secret purse language she uses to signal her handlers? She also ALWAYS wins at Charades. Also also, she (allegedly) makes people play Charades. Join Erin and Nicole as they spill ALL the High Tea on the etiquette, rules and quirks of being a part of the Queen's entourage.

E150: Funderwear Jan 08, 2020

Join Erin and Nicole as they discuss all the bells, whistles, petticoats, ribbing, underwires, and itchy crotches of women's underwear throughout the centuries.

E149: The Best of the Worst of the Decade Jan 01, 2020

Erin and Nicole look back at the decade and remember some of the best worst (and worst best) fashion trends, food trends, and celebrity news. What a time to be alive!

E148: Meowy Dismas Dec 25, 2019

It's the annual DTFU Holiday Party! In this episode, Erin and Nicole apologize for missing an important part of Yeti research from the previous episode, roast each other with their tradition of Sinterklaas poems, and talk about the biggest box office bomb of 2019 (it's Cats).

E147: Disco Yeti Dec 18, 2019

Erin and Nicole climbed the proverbial mountain that is Everest, when they covered the legend of "Sasquatch" in an early episode. Then, they covered actual Everest, when they talked at length about the trash and excrement (and dead bodies) that get left behind on climbing expeditions. And now, (*switches into Jimmy Stewart impression*), it comes full Sir Cole. This episode is all about the legendary Yeti, cousin to Sasquatch and rumored inhabitant of Everest.

E146: Guy and Dolls Dec 11, 2019

Cabbage Patch Kids: they were the hottest toy of the late 80s/early 90s, even though they looked less like cabbage and more like a Mr. Baked Potato Head. Erin and Nicole reveal the hidden truth (which can easily be found anywhere) about the real origin of the dolls and the guy who stole the idea and made it his own. GROSS.

E145: Men at Werk Dec 04, 2019

In this episode, Erin and Nicole take you through the ups and downs and literal ins and outs of the Australian-born art form known as "Puppetry of the Penis."

E144: Piggy Shades of Grey Nov 27, 2019

This week, Erin and Nicole read some of your listener stories, as well as some original steamy fiction inspired by Episode 142: Vermonster!

E143: Not Down with the Clown Nov 20, 2019

This episode isn't about Juggalos/lettes, but there's hella face paint and sno-cone wigs. Join Erin and Nicole as they talk about Coulrophobia, also known as the fear of clowns.

E142: Vermonster Nov 13, 2019

If you thought all cryptids were hairy, non-sexy beings, you haven't met the Pigman of Vermont! Slather yourself in maple syrup and join Erin and Nicole while they get sloppy talkin' bout this beefy, er- porky, urban legend of an animal-man. Discussion includes but is not limited to: how he came to be, how an erotic novel about him might read and, of course, what his crypt-dick looks like!

E141: Killdozer Nov 06, 2019

What were you doing in 2004? Erin and Nicole were flat-ironing their swoopy bangs and apparently not watching the news. Otherwise they would have seen a very interesting story about a man who bulldozed an entire town in a makeshift Transformer. Join our Dudes as they discuss this week's topic: Killdozer.

E140: Scary Stories to Tell on the Pod Oct 30, 2019

This week brings so many treats and very few tricks. Join Nicole as she recounts the journey of the tabloid darling Bat Boy, and then get comfy while Erin reads a spoopy story from "Scary Stories to Tell in the Dark," and surprises Nicole with a festive poem!

E139: The Amos Pore Oct 23, 2019

Welp, they've finally stumbled on their own, original synonym for "butthole." And that's in the first 10 minutes - it's all uphill from there! Join Erin and Nicole as they continue their run of spoopy content with Spectrophilia. It's a fancy term for "sex with ghosts." And while they might not believe the personal accounts of ghost-bonin', they're fully on board for the kink.

E138: Salem Witch Fails Part 2 Oct 16, 2019

You've probably already guessed things didn't end well for those accused of witchcraft in Salem in 1692, but there's no way to know for sure unless you listen to this episode! Or I guess you could Google it, but Erin and Nicole already did that for you! Tighten that bonnet and and hike up those stockings for the conclusion to the two-part series on the Salem Witch Trials of 1692.

E137: Salem Witch Fails Part 1 Oct 09, 2019

'Tis the season to get spoopy, y'all! Light your pumpkin spice candle, slice up a honey crisp apple and get hygge with Erin and Nicole this week, as they discuss the events leading up to the Salem Witch Trials of 1692. Stay tuned for the part two, where we get into the actual trial events. Spoiler alert: they were a complete sh*t show.

***Visit closecallstudio.com or follow them @closecallstudio on Instagram. Not an ad, they're just the coolest and we gave them a shoutout on this episode!***

E136: Gnumber Two Oct 02, 2019

The "g" isn't necessarily silent, it's more of a "nyah" sound. Like "gnocchi." Or "Gnard." Or I guess even "N'York Times," which is where the inspiration for this episode originated. Join Erin and Nicole this week and they discuss office bathroom politics, public bathroom etiquette and a whole lot of their personal habits. Why? Good question. But if it's news enough for the New York Times, it's news enough for the Dudes.

E135: Mr. Ballvedere Sep 25, 2019

This episode topic was born out of a tall tale mentioned on another podcast, and it quickly spiraled out of control. Erin and Nicole get to the bottom of it, but there's still a lot to unpack surrounding the urban legend of Mr. Belvedere's exploded sack.

Have you rated us on iTunes yet? We'd love to read your review!

E134: Donner Party on Ice Sep 18, 2019

What do you get when you mix two G&Ts, a calorie deprived freelancer, and a woman whose underwear is lost on a truck somewhere in the continental US? This week's episode of DTFU, duh! Join Erin and Nicole as they discuss the tragic circumstances and recently solved mystery surrounding the (Not Benjamin) Franklin Expedition.

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Editor's Note:

This episode may have a slightly different sound. That's because I kinda botched the recording? Lucky for us, Pete was able to help salvage it. And thank Pete, because this episode gave us Benny Franks.

Thank you all for being excellent. Share this with a friend? Love you!

-Nicole

E133: The Grossest Showman Sep 11, 2019

Not to be confused with the Greatest (?) Showman P.T. Barnum, this episode's subject is a sort of real-life Gaston. If Gaston was more disgusting and got the "Gas" part of his name from his nasty farts. Join Erin and Nicole as they make their way through the life and times of maybe-cannibal Tarrare. The jury's out on human flesh, but he definitely ate his own doo doo.

E132: California Gurls Sep 04, 2019

Erin's in the building! Literally, she's in Nicole's building and they are recording together, in person, and it's everything you wanted it to be! Unless you wanted it to be a full-length episode, in which case you'll be disappointed. Join our hosts this week as they recap Erin's move and drink wine and cry-laugh. It just comes so easily in person! (But seriously, there isn't a topic this week. But also, it's still fun.)

E131: The Harshest of Mistresses Aug 28, 2019

Say that three times fast. You sound like Daffy Duck, don't you? This week, take a road trip of the mind to DTFU's favorite place: Las Vegas. She's a city of vices: cocktails, gambling, porno cards (you may know them as escort cards?) and she can be a real bitch. Join Erin and Nicole as they talk about the series of tunnels below the strip and how harsh Lady Luck can really be.

E130: Sounds like a Draaaaag Aug 21, 2019

I think this is one of those "this-was-a-click-bait-article-but-maybe-there's-something-there" episodes? Doesn't matter - it's happening. Join Erin and Nicole for an hour long conversation about the ridiculous RuLes the contestants *allegedly* have to abide by, during the filming of a season of RuPaul's Drag Race. Category is: Earhole Eleganza!

E129: Hail Satan! Aug 14, 2019

This week, the satanic rituals are plentiful as Erin and Nicole finally dig into the cultural phenomenon that is the Satanic Panic. It's like the Salem Witch Trials, but with more hairspray.

E128: Hot Girl Summer Aug 07, 2019

Hopefully you're sippin' a blended beverage on the beach/next to a pool/with your feet in the sink, because it's summer and the heat is on! Join Erin and Nicole as they discuss the evolution of women's swimwear. TLDL (too long, didn't listen)? Just know women had to basically wear a wooden box at one point.

E127: Drop It Like It's Not Jul 31, 2019

There's an age-old, summer tradition in the Netherlands where young, pre-teen children are dumped off in the forest and have to find their way back to civilization. Except, maybe there isn't? I mean, there is, but it sounds like camping? Join Erin and Nicole this week as they discuss the New York Times profile on the Dutch "tradition" of Dropping.

E126: Dr. Sly C. DeClitt Jul 24, 2019

This episode is a train wreck from start to finish. Erin and Nicole leave the station via the Cats Trailer, picking up speed as they make a slight left into The Lion King. There's a quick detour to make a pit stop at the Patreon and finally, it's full speed ahead on the nightmare of this week's topic: Dr. James Burt AKA the "Love Surgeon" aka the UNCERTIFIED vaginal surgeon. You know what? Let's just all hang out in the train's bar car so we can guard each others' clits, as we toast to the doctor with the most misplaced confidence of anyone we've ever heard of...once we reach the point of the episode where he died in 2012.

You can check out our Patreon and listen to the Vaginal Rejuvenation Bonus Episode here!

E125: The Baddest Bitch and the Return of Sir Anus Jul 17, 2019

Guess who's back? Back again? Here's a hint: he's got less taint than any royal you've ever met. It's Louis XIV! But he's just keeping up appearances, because we have a real hero on our hands who deserves all of our attention and more. Join Erin and Nicole as they talk about the most badass lady you've never heard of: Julie d'Aubigny, aka Mademoiselle Maupin. If she were alive today, she'd be be the hero we need AND deserve.

E124: Salmonfished by a Kansas Millionaire Jul 10, 2019

This episode is a little loose, what with recapping all of the celebrations the past week (4th of July, Nicole's Birthday, Erin's new California house warming, Jack's almost-first birthday, etc). But it's also WILD, as Pete's brother Benny (a public defender in Alaska), is working on a VERY crazy murder case. Join Erin and Nicole this week, as they discuss the emerging details of the Eklutna River Murder.

E123: Picture Worthy Jul 03, 2019

Every year on July 4th, people from all over the world gather in the seaside town of Coney Island, New York, to compete in a timed, no-condiment, very soggy hot dog eating contest. It's disgusting, but it's part of the fabric of the USA. Join Erin and Nicole this week as they explore the ins (and eventual outs) of the world of competitive eating.

E122: Dungeon of Sex Jun 26, 2019

If you haven't listened to Episode 62, "Cult du Jour," start there. Unless you're cool skipping right to the really f****d up stuff, then you've come to the right place! This week, Erin and Nicole discuss some of the details that have emerged from the trial and conviction of Keith Raniere, the founder/leader of the MLM-Cult that is NXIVM.

E121: Hacky Sack with a Face Jun 19, 2019

Erin's got a cold. Nicole's got two retainers. But nothing's going to stop these two from ripping the stuffing out of the plush darlings of the 90's: Beanie Babies. Join our Host Dudes for a look at the rise (and fall) of one of the biggest, hardest to understand crazes of the last century.

(As mentioned in the episode, share this link with a friend to introduce them to the pod! https://dtfupodcast.com/new-dtfu)

E120: Dickini Jun 12, 2019

What is a "dickini?" We imagine it's like a Borat swimsuit? Or maybe some sort of two piece: one for the frank, one for the beans? Or is there one piece for each bean? So maybe it's a three piece? We're into this too far. Just know Erin and Nicole are talking a lot of trash this week, about the infamous Balloon Boy Hoax of 2009.

E119: LulaRuhRoh Jun 05, 2019

This week, Erin and Nicole harken back to the beginning of this podcast, to do a deeper dive into one very f****d up MLM. So put on your ass-less leggings, sign your $5,000 check and two-step on into this downline, partner! It's LulaRoe, you BOSS B*TCH.

E118: Bargain Bin Abe Lincoln May 29, 2019

We love, love, love our listeners, so the math checks out that we'd love our listeners' stories. You are a bevy of wordsmiths, what with your scintillating sex stories, your traumatic school trip tales and your frightening fart-uterus fables. What's a fart-uterus? Guess you'll have to listen to this mother load of a mullet-sode to find out!

If you're interested in hearing your story on a future episode of the podcast, email us at dtfupodcast@gmail.com or visit our website (dtfupodcast.com).

E117: Fur Sure May 22, 2019

Do you relate more to The Beast than the Beauty? Do you wish Sonic the Hedgehog was your wingman? Do you get a little heart tingle every time you see the Charmin Bears wipin' those cute little bear buns? If you answered yes to any of those questions, you're probably a Furry! Join Erin and Nicole as they learn what defines a furry, some of the myths around furry-dom (it's not all sexual), and...well they somehow get to a point where they rate cartoon animals on hotness. It was mostly an accident.

E116: La Loyd May 15, 2019

Our ladies wanted to do an episode on a bad mom because it felt timely with Mother's Day last weekend. Unfortunately, they committed too early and found out this Mama maybe wasn't bad at all? But that's ok, because we still got a fun story and a new lullaby for BB Jack! Join Erin and Nicole as they discuss the life and times of maybe (?) criminal Ma Barker, and her sons, a rag tag group of actual criminals, the Barker Boys.

E115: Totally Buggin' May 08, 2019

Remember Episode 76, "The Tipping Point," where Erin and Nicole surprised each other with weird animal dicks? They're back at it again this week with bugs! Join Erin and Nicole as they take turns surprising each other with pictures of the weirdest/grossest bugs they can find on the internet with minimal research. Will you puke? No, jeez, calm down. But I guess you might feel a little gaggy, depending on your tolerance for gross bugs.

E114: The Crimelight May 01, 2019

New York in the 80s and 90s was not the sterile, Starbucks-on-every-block, Disney Main Street it is today. It had grit. Personality. Wear a monocle and a clown wig, and clamp your nipples under a mesh top kind of personality. In fact, being wild and over-the-top was exactly how the Club Kids came to be. Join Erin and Nicole this week for a look at the life and crimes (convicted murderer, y'all) of the Party Monster himself: Michael Alig.

E113: John Wayne Hobbit Apr 24, 2019

Slather yourself in fake tanner, bump your ponytail and spritz yourself in the finest eau d'boardwalk hotdog water. Erin and Nicole find their new favorite word in this episode about the legend of the Jersey Devil.

E112: Ultra Party Time! Apr 17, 2019

From the 1950s to the 1970s, the U.S. Government ran an experiment in mind control. How, you ask? They slipped a bunch of people LSD, bro! Like the morning after a night out, Erin and Nicole do their best to rehash the details of the 20-year involuntary drug binge that is MK Ultra, and the attempts the government made to cover some of it up.

E111: The Elvisodes, Part Two Apr 10, 2019

As meteoric as the King's rise to fame was, his fall from atop the golden throne was, well, literal. Join Erin and Nicole as they recount some of Elvis' career highlights, his marriage to Priscilla, and his spiral into sex, drugs and guns.

E110: The Elvisodes, Part One Apr 03, 2019

Hope you're up for the first of a very special two-parter this week! Erin and Nicole discuss all of the things that went sideways and backwards for Elvis to be regarded as the King. So slick back your hair, swerve your hips and dial in to hear all about the rise of the career of 1950s Post Malone: Elvis Presley.

E109: Xenu Later, Thetan-gator! Mar 27, 2019

Scientology is a HUGE undertaking as a topic, so our ladies decided to approach it with one very specific question: where is Shelly Miscavige? Join Erin and Nicole this week as they try to figure out where the first lady of Scientology has gone. Honestly, it's still very unclear (that's a Scientology pun).

E108: I Be Dead People Mar 20, 2019

What if Haley Joel Osment's sixth sense wasn't seeing dead people, but was convincing himself he was being dead people?! This week, Erin and Nicole talk about Cotard Delusion/Syndrome, which is when people are 100% convinced they are dead. It's a wild ride.

E107: A Must Flee! Mar 13, 2019

You've seen the advertisements; from billboards to pamphlets, postcards to post-its, pins to t-shirts, cake toppers to hand-knitted coasters - the Shen Yun promotional materials are everywhere! If you said you hadn't seen one, I'd be worried. Join Erin and Nicole as they explore the religion of Falun Gong and the borderline cult-tendencies they have when propagating their beliefs through dance!

E106: Moth Balls Mar 06, 2019

You know where you find moth balls? The crotchal area of a cryptid, duh! Join Erin and Nicole on a mental road trip to Point Pleasant, West Virginia, where the red-eyed Mothman "lives." Nay, THRIVES.

E105: Clean Cut Feb 27, 2019

Happy anniversary, Dudes! Can you believe it's been two years since Erin and Nicole decided to take a stab at this podcasting thing? Cut to today, and they're livin' the dream! Each episode is a little slice of their "favorite" f****d up things. And they've carved out the perfect episode for you this week: it's the 1993 events and trial of Lorena (Bobbitt) Gallo.

E104: Sex-Sea Times Feb 19, 2019

In the 1960s, scientists realized dolphins were highly intelligent creatures. Research labs worked hard to develop communication with dolphins, even trying to teach them the English language. But no one put in more work than Margaret Howe Lovatt. She was very hands on. And that's a hint to one of the f****d up things about Margaret's work in the tank. Join Erin and Nicole as they discuss Margaret, her boss Dr. Lilly, his wife Mary and their main subject: Peter the dolphin.

E103: Astronaughty Feb 13, 2019

Happy Gallontine's Day, ya b-holes! And no, I don't mean "Galentine's," like the holiday spent celebrating your female friendships. I mean "gallon" as in the amount of pee pee collected in the space diaper of astronaut Lisa Nowak, who in 2007, drove cross-country to assault her ex-boyfriends new lovah. Join Erin and Nicole as they get lost in the Astronaut Love Triangle, just in time for the National Day of Sexy Times!

E102: Farmland Fyre Feb 06, 2019

With the release of two new documentaries (one on Netflix and one on Hulu), the Fyre Festival has once again* found its way to DTFU. Except this time, Erin and Nicole used it as a jumping off point to discuss the sh*t-show of a music festival that started it all: Woodstock. Gas up your VW bus, sunscreen those tiddies and let it all hang out as we time travel back to 1969, man!

*Mentioned in Episode 11, "Pyramid Royale," and Episode 77, "A Grift from the Gods."

E101: How Could We Nazi This Coming?! Jan 30, 2019

In this week's episode, Erin and Nicole explore the troubling past of one member of the 90's Swedish Pop band Ace of Base, as well as a not so far fetched conspiracy theory that the whole ensemble was a Neo-Nazi group. I saw the sign. And it was a swastika.

E100: Catherine the GOAT Jan 23, 2019

You wanted the great, you got the great! Catherine the Great(est) was a woman well ahead of her time, especially when it came to taking lovahs. Join Erin and Nicole as they discuss her glow up, debunk some myths around Catherine the Great's love life, and celebrate making it to the 100th episode! *Air horns*

E99: Radioactive BS Jan 16, 2019

In the countdown to the 100th episode, Erin and Nicole tell the story of David Charles Hahn, the Radioactive Boy Scout. You thought Kevin McCallister was a genius? This kid McGuyvered a nuclear reactor in his mom's garden shed. And here we thought Boy Scouts just made lanyards and pooped in the woods.

E98: Stall Tale Jan 09, 2019

This week's episode has everything Erin and Nicole could ever want in an urban legend: bathrooms, hot dudes, fashuns, toilets, bathrooms. But it also has a lot of really weird stuff like elementary school kids, vests and different colored toilet paper. Put down a seat cover and get comfy, this is the tale of Aka Manto. And stay tuned for a few bonus mentions of people who infamously died on the toilet. RIPoo.

E97: New Year, New Poo Jan 02, 2019

A lot of people make New Year's Resolutions, many of which revolve around living a healthier lifestyle. That's fantastic. I started 2019 with several Hostess Donettes and a Starbucks Blueberry Muffin, so there's that. In this week's episode, Erin and Nicole just want to make sure that if you are turning a healthy leaf in 2019, there's not a tape worm on the underside of said leaf that you plan on ingesting, just to drop a few pounds. Yep, you guessed it, this episode is about fad diets. Here's a cookie, now LIVE YOUR LIFE.

E96: Sappy New Year Dec 26, 2018

Join Erin and Nicole this week as they recap 2018, share a few favorite moments from the podcast and say "I love you" about three thousand times while drinking wine.

E95: Ghost of Farts Past/Passed Dec 19, 2018

Maybe Erin and Nicole are regular ol' Scrooges. Or maybe they don't like the smell of urine/vomit. Either way, Nicole and Erin agree Santa Con is not their thing - not now, not when it originated in the 70s, not ever. Lucky, this episode also features their favorite holiday tradition: it's the 2nd Annual Reading of the Sinterklaas poems! Nothing like roasting a friend with a rhyme!

E94: Water Slide, Slaughter Slide Dec 12, 2018

Rumor has it, there was a water park in the average state of New Jersey that let you swing like Tarzan into a pool of water, shoot tennis balls at people's faces and do a full vertical loop on a waterslide. Erin and Nicole are here to tell you that ain't no myth: that's Action Park Babaaaay! Join the ladies as they recount the history of this water park, why it got shut down in the 90s (spoiler alert: LAW SUITS) and why it came back.

E93: No Soliciting Dec 05, 2018

What happens when you try to spread your gospel to an island of people who haven't been bothered by outsiders for 60,000ish years? An arrow to the back (literally, this isn't a bad joke punchline). This week, Erin and Nicole discuss the recent death of an American missionary on North Sentinel Island, located in the Bay of Bengal. But that's just a segue into several instances of the island slamming the door in the face of unwanted visitors. And THAT is just a segue into the rudest visitor they've ever had: Officer Maurice Vidal Portman.

E92: Return of the Mack Nov 28, 2018

DJ did such a great job guest hosting with Erin, we were tempted to make it permanent. But turns out someone that funny and talented is very busy and important, so Nicole's back. Join the ladies as they catch up with each other, Erin talks s*** on a mommy blogger and Nicole finally reveals whether she remembered to tell Erin's anesthesia joke before surgery.

E91: Be Our Guest Nov 21, 2018

This week, Erin's husband DJ guest hosts on a very special episode of the pod! You thought Nicole talked a lot about poop? She does...but so does DJ! And speaking of guests, a reminder: make sure you read all of the reviews of that Airbnb you booked in your hometown this holiday season. And so you know we're serious, we present some of the worst Airbnb stories of all time. (This episode's rated 5 out of 5 pubes.)

E90: Dance, Dance, Dance 'Til You're Dead Nov 14, 2018

We've all been there. You hit just the right ratio of G&Ts to several of your favorite songs played in a row and BAM! You're dancing so hard you're in danger of slipping in a pool of your own sweat. This week, Erin and Nicole discuss the biggest, most dangerous dance party to ever exist. People danced for so long and so hard, they died. Sad, but what a way to go...

E89: The Gathering Lite Nov 07, 2018

Imagine, if you will, the Gathering of the Juggalos. Add a few more white people dreadlocks, subtract everyone's shoes, multiply by the largest off-beat drum circle you can think of and you have The Rainbow Gathering. It's half cult, half festival and 100% nothing Erin and Nicole ever want to be a part of.

E88: The Ooky Spooky Halloween (Not So) Spectacular! Oct 31, 2018

This is a pretty standard episode, with the exception of it having a True Crime-y vibe, just in time for Halloween! Join Erin and Nicole as they discuss the details around The Borden Murders, and why everyone in that household was just about ready to murder someone.

E87: Hip Cheese Oct 24, 2018

This week, Erin and Nicole read some of your worst (and funniest) surgery-related horror stories. So I guess it's kind of on-brand for Halloween? But also, it's on-brand for the surgery Nicole is recovering from. (A Note from the Editor: Honestly, these were such a treat and very comforting in a weird way and thank you to everyone who sent one in! -Nicole)

E86: Roku-coo for Content Oct 17, 2018

Show of hands: who here has a Roku? Have you ever watched any of the Roku Channels? These are independently created/programmed channels by individuals (and also cults) that feature a wide range of content. From Water Sports (not what it sounds like) to Catbox TV (also not what it sounds like) to Reddit Browser (what it sounds like) Erin and Nicole discuss the weirdest things they can find in the Roku Directory.

E85: President Warren G. Hard On Oct 10, 2018

In this episode, Erin and Nicole talk about President Warren G. Harding, and the numerous love affairs he had. Some of which bore tell-all books (a first!), some which bore children and some which bore a reason to not hang your coat in the White House coat closet. Come for the facts, stay for the love letter excerpts, where he names his dong after Nicole's uncle.

E84: Oeuf N' Boeuf Oct 03, 2018

Roughly translated from French, this week's title means "Egg and Beef." Coincidentally, both of those things are lewks Lady Gaga has donned on the red carpet. Which leads us to todays episode topic: the conspiracy theory around the death of a rising pop star and Lady Ga-Ga's own rise to fame.

E83: The Goodwill Dildo Sep 26, 2018

Barely any business upfront and a whole lot of party (aka rosé) in the back? Must be a mulletsode! Erin and Nicole skipped the research this week to bring you some amazing listener stories while they sipped wine IN PERSON. You do not want to miss this Boss Babe Predator having, Birdshit Necklace wearing, Bloated Elvis seeing, Sisterhood of the Traveling Sex Toy sharing episode!

E82: We're All Scrooged. Sep 19, 2018

Erin and Nicole originally planned this episode to be a love letter to the legendary Bill Murray. He's an immensely talented actor, a whimsical human and an all around fun guy. But, as with DTFU's favorite vegetable the on-yun, humans have many layers and some are outright stinky. Anyway, we uncovered some unfortunate things and we're having a conversation.

E81: OM. MY. GAH. Is This Another Sex Cult!? Sep 12, 2018

You know it is! But this one is special. Usually, cults have some talk of a god or aliens or chakras to mask the sex stuff. But not this one - this cult is all business. Seriously, it might also be a pyramid scheme. This cult moves straight from walking in the door to "Orgasmic Meditation" to getting people to spend thousands of dollars without batting an eyelash. They are hardworking little clit cadets!

Join Erin and Nicole as they discuss One Taste, the Orgasmic Meditation Cult!

E80: What Do We Do With (Nep)al This Sh*t?! Sep 05, 2018

Today, Erin and Nicole discuss a very serious issue facing Mt. Everest. Perhaps you already know there are bodies strewn about, frozen mile markers for hopeful climbers. But what you may not know is that Mt. Everest is also covered in sh*t. Not figurative sh*t, like garbage or broken equipment, though that's there too. Literally every person who has ever made it their number one goal to climb her, has left behind a number two. That means poop. Mt. Everest is covered in poop.

Visit www.DTFUPodcast.com for more information!

E79: The Berry Theory Aug 29, 2018

Our U.S. National Parks are a treasure. We have some of the most beautiful, majestic, bald-eagle laden, babbling creek (pronounced "crik") havin', fresh aired, large nature places in the world. And that's fine and great, until you go missing. Why? Because we don't have a system for tracking missing persons if they disappear in a National Park. And if we can't be bothered to record our missing people, how in the heck are we going to keep track of a ding dang Sasquatch?! (For more information on Sasquatch, please reference DTFU Podcast, Episode 18: "Dude'Squatch.")

Keep to the marked trail and join Erin and Nicole as they discuss the highly request topic of Missing 411.

E78: TMI AMA Aug 22, 2018

Erin and Nicole are back from the pre-prerecorded episodes and catching up on all things Baby Watch 2018! Because the ladies share everything with each other, they're also sharing it with you. Join the ladies for an up close and personal look at childbirth and the aftermath. It's a literal sh*t show.

E77: A Grift from the Gods Aug 15, 2018

This week, Erin and Nicole recount the high-level grifter whose grifting left a wake of hotels, restaurants, credit companies and Vanity Fair photographers with a debt yet to be repaid. How did the blonde, petite, vaguely European-accented Anna Delvey swindle all of these people? Short answer: crisp hundred dollar bills and a smile. But of course, it's more complicated than that.

Visit us at dtfupodcast.com for more!

E76: The Tipping Point Aug 08, 2018

Straight up, this episode is about weird animal penises. Mostly. I mean, there's some other weird stuff that is penis-adjacent. But for the most part, Erin and Nicole are our nature guides and we've entered animal dong territory.

Shout out to all the listeners who requested this topic. What a wild ride!

E75: Take Me to Megachurch (Part Two) Aug 01, 2018

"If I could turn back tiiiiiiime" I would go back to "Episode 74: Take Me to Megachurch (Part One)" and relive the moment I learned of the name "DawnCher." Blessings. If Part One of the Hillsong Megachurch two-parter was the light, fluffy, fun twin, Part Two is the dark, hairless, distressed one that ate the first twin in the womb. Weird analogy, but we'll keep it 'cause this episode is where s*** gets real. But also, Erin and Nicole can't help from laughing, so there's also that.

E74: Take Me to Megachurch (Part One) Jul 25, 2018

Erin and Nicole take on this topic with a Pratt in their step and a Hillsong in their hearts. Join them this week as they travel to Australia to uncover the origins of the celebrity infested megachurch-franchise Hillsong. In part one, you'll get the scoop on the worship "experience," meet the "Hype-priests" who run thangs, and uncover the real-life celebrities who eat it all up.

E73: Silly Rabbit, Facts are for Kids! Jul 18, 2018

Have you heard of the Bunnyman? What is the origin story of this mysterious creature? Seriously, because I'm so confused after this episode. Is it true crime? Is it paranormal? Is it both? Is it neither? All I know is something actually maybe happened somewhere in Virginia in the year 1970-ish. There was an axe-hatchet thing and either a couple or one dude. And the Bunnyman was maybe wearing a hat, but maybe not. You know what? Why don't we just let Erin and Nicole sort it out, huh?

*All research for this episode was completed at the Clifton Town Library.

E72: License to Dread Jul 11, 2018

Remember in the movie Breakfast at Tiffany's, how Doc shows up looking for Audrey Hepburn and you think, "Aww, her dad!" But then you find out he's HER HUSBAND and she was 14 when he married her on that farm and then you're like "OH HELL NO." Well this week, Erin and Nicole are talking about child marriage and the laws in America that are failing to protect some youngsters. *Siiiiiiiigh* Can you already feel the exasperation? But there are some badass organizations out there changing laws and takin' names. More like, giving names...back to the young women they're helping get out of these marriages! We wouldn't leave you without a bright side!

E71: Baby, You're a Firewerk Jul 04, 2018

Ahhh, American Independence Day! The day we celebrate our victory over British tyranny a couple of centuries ago*. Get ready to blow things up, binge drink**, eat too much barbecued meats, and get hella sunburnt. July 4th also means it's time to celebrate Nicole's birthday***, and that's even more of an excuse to party! Let's celebrate this country and our co-host by listening to Erin and Nicole talk about some of the craziest fireworks mishaps throughout history!

*Shout out to England. We're like cousins that beat the crap out of each other and maybe one or both of us sustained permanent face and brain damage but like, we're cool now, right?? **Don't get blackout drunk and do 'splosions! *** Erin made a few donations in Nicole's name for her birthday. If you're interested in learning more about the organizations she donated to, please go to their websites:

The Trevor Project: https://www.thetrevorproject.org/

The Florence Project: https://firrp.org/

Every Town for Gun Safety: https://everytown.org/

E70: While You Were Sleeping Jun 27, 2018

Our lady, who art in movies, Sandy B thy name, is our patron saint of this week's episode. She Was doin' it right in 2014, when an intruder/stalker broke into her home in the middle of the night. You know why? She'd seen Panic Room (starring a young K-Stew) and she installed a "safe door." Miss Congeniality? More like, Miss THE COPS ARE ON THEIR WAY, MOTHER F***ER. Join Erin and Nicole as they recount Sandra Bullock's very scary situation and the aftermath of the encounter. Oh, and a couple of other celebrity stalker stories 'cause they're relevant to this episode.

E69: That Girl has Pooooison Jun 20, 2018

This episode is a throwback...to the Roman Empire. Back then, you could throw a stone and hit 400 f****d up things before it even hit the ground. It'd be all ricocheting around the plaza, hitting murderers and whiny emperors and stuff. Any one of those things would have made for a great episode...and maybe someday they will. But today, the focus on a lady-herbologist who knew some thaaaangs. She knew that if you ground up this herb and that herb, you could make it look like someone's death was an accident. Sounds like the dark arts, but I think it's more Practical Magic (Sandy B reference!). Join Erin and Nicole today as they whip up a concoction (read: podcast episode) on the infamous mistress of poison, Locusta!

E68: Nickelbang Jun 13, 2018

(Verb): To fornicate to the sounds of Canadian rock band Nickelback. See also: Nickelblast.

That's right, Erin and Nicole are expanding your vocabulary today, inspired by a listener story! And to round out the episode (aka make it the length of a regular episode), the ladies explore a very fun, yet complicated conspiracy theory about Avril Lavigne. Did you get the joke? 'Cause Avril has a song called "Complicated?" It's funny.

E67: DIY BIO Jun 06, 2018

This whole episode can be summed up with the phrase "leave it to the experts." Let the scientists do the science stuff, let the astronauts do the astro stuff and let the podcasters do the Bigfoot's dick jokes. But these days, everything is a crap shoot and people who have zero credentials in anything are telling people the earth is flat, so f*** me, right? Might as well let a bunch of randoms try and science their way to a cure for herpes because why not? This week, join Erin and Nicole as they explore the seedy underbelly of Biohacking and all of hubris surrounding "DIY Biology."

E66: Motley Eüüüü May 30, 2018

From their inception until the height of their career (and really, now), one band defined the decade of decadence. They drank all the drinks, did all the drugs and clogged all the drains with their long ass 80s hair. But all that hard livin' catches up to you and before you know it, you've reached your fifties, you look sixty, and your body feels like it's seventy. This week, Erin and Nicole look back at the rise of one of the greatest bands the 80s ever chewed up and spit back out: Motley Crüe.

E65: The Greatest Showman? (Part Two) May 23, 2018

If you haven't listened to Episode 64 (Part One of the PT Barnum Two-Parter) start there. If you're all caught up, we're finally getting to the circus stuff, Dudes! Let's recap quickly, shall we? PT Barnum was what we'd call a "s***bag." He exploited a ton of people, he was a swindler and he looked nothing like Hugh Jackman. Join Erin and Nicole as they visit the next chapter in his life, where he's mostly up to the same old awful humbugs.

E64: The Greatest Showman? (Part One) May 16, 2018

PT Barnum was a show-man alright. But was he the greatest? Ummm, I guess it depends on how you define "greatest?" If by "greatest," you mean he was the most icky, opportunist, racist humbug out there, then sure. Let's call him the "greatest." Join Erin and Nicole as they eye roll their way through their first two-part episode!

E63: Game of (Porcelain) Thrones May 09, 2018

They've finally done it. A whole episode about toilets. From holes in the ground to holes in castles to holes in space, join Erin and Nicole as they discover all the ways people dispose of their poop.

E62: Cult du Jour May 02, 2018

"Mmmm, that sounds good. I'll have that." -Lloyd Christmas

This week's episode has all of the status levels of a cult. We've got your diamonds, your sapphires, your golds, your platinums...Hang on, is this a cult or an MLM? It was a trick question - it's BOTH! And now we all rejoice with Erin and Nicole as they dive into the most current of events: The NXIVM cult. Hold onto your second butthole because this is breaking news and it's only getting crazier from here!

E61: RIP Gawker Apr 25, 2018

There once was a website where the snark was abundant and the sass flowed like wine. It covered current events with meticulous shade and well-crafted dick jokes. It was elitist, in the trashiest way. Join Erin and Nicole as they celebrate free speech by discussing one of the most critical cases to involve the first amendment in U.S. history, resulting in the subsequent takedown of one of their all-time favorite websites: Gawker.

E60: Meat Cred Apr 18, 2018

Episode 59 (The Herpes of Conspiracy Theories) really put a bee in your bonnets! There is a deep divide in the DTFUniverse that has pinned dude against dude. You're either Team #meatballsaremeatloaf or you're team #thef***yousaytome?! Speaking of meat, Roscoe "Fatty" Arbuckle was one of the biggest (*ahem*) silent film stars of his day. That is, until a woman at one of his parties died and a huge scandal was born. Erin and Nicole present some of the evidence but have no real verdicts. Not why you came here anyway, huh?

E59: The Herpes of Conspiracy Theories Apr 11, 2018

Get you some Valtrex, dudes! We're gettin' all up in the Illuminati this week (IllumiNaughty, if ya nasty)! It was a significant undertaking as a topic, but we approached it like Erin would an oversized slice of Costco pizza: with an appetite for destruction. Learn about the origins of the Illuminati, why it's stuck around for so long, and speculation on its biggest celebrity members.

E58: My Neck, My Back Apr 04, 2018

The tom foolery in this week's episode was so over the top, it surprised even our hosts. Ordinarily, that'd be a bad sign, but this podcast is extra. *Slips into Jonathan Lipnicki's character from Jerry Maguire* Did you know that Chiropractic is a noun AND an adjective?! OK, that was too much. Enjoy this week's episode about the godfather of chiropractic, DD Palmer, and his almost religion/non-medical practice that could be complete quackery.

E57: Brace Yourself for the Bhagwan! Mar 28, 2018

This episode is not directly related to Rajneesh, but there is a connection! So why not exploit the popularity of the Netflix series "Wild, Wild Country" in the title, 'cause it's soooo hot right now?!

This week, Erin and Nicole are actually talking about the Cascadia Subduction Zone. It's not an emo band - it's an area in North America where the tectonic plates have created some serious pressure. And at some point, the pressure is going to release. And at that point, we're gonna have a big earthquake. Big. Huge. (Followed by a tsunami and probably some sort of apocalypse.)

E56: I Bind You, Nancy! Mar 21, 2018

We're back in the Victorian Era, where people were having a hard time. But not Anna Kingsford. She was basically living the real-life version of The Craft, summoning Manon to hurt her enemies. She was also the Beatrix Kiddo living a real-life story of revenge, a la Kill Bill. Real quick: this episode has a lot of film analogies and all of them are probably wrong. But that doesn't change how hell bent Anna Kingsford was on bringing down the vivisectors of the late 19th century.

E55: Dude, That's *BLEEP*ed Up Mar 14, 2018

Profanity. Nudity. Stupidity. There are a lot of unplanned incidents when it comes to live TV. That's why most live programming has a 5-10 second delay. It allows the censors to hit the "dump button" (bad name), and GET RID of the questionable content. But the censor is human and us humans are prone to error. In fact, this episode is probably riddled with error, as Erin and Nicole recount some of the events throughout TV's history, that didn't get censored when they definitely should have been.

E54: Dallas Cowboys Chic Mar 07, 2018

Have you ever had a "philosophical discussion regarding Ed Hardy?" Well, you're about to! This week, Erin and Nicole revisit the fashion faux pas of the aughts, the most egregious of trends being It-doesn't-matter-if-it-already-has-a-skull-and-fire-and-hearts-and-rhinestones-on-it-slap-it-with-some-cheetah-print-Ed Hardy. In it's heyday, you could find the brand on the A-listyist of A-Listers. And today? You can still find an Ed Hardy wearer in the wild - Atlantic City, downtown Las Vegas and any off brand, small town America strip club. And that feels right.

E53: Happy Birthday, DTFU! Feb 28, 2018

It's been a full year since Erin and Nicole started this f****d up journey across the land of pod! Let's give them this episode to reflect on how far they've come from Episode 1: CSI Stands for Cracklin' Skin Investigators. Well, would you look at that! They talk a little faster, now! They definitely seem more comfortable. Hang on, they're still having trouble pronouncing things...annnnnnd they're still talking about farts. So they haven't come THAT far. But they're one year older, fifty-two f****d up episodes wiser and love all you dudes a whole HERFF of a lot!

E52: Party 'fore the Party Feb 21, 2018

We're one week out from DTFU Podcast's one year anniversary episode and we're starting the celebration early with some tunes! A few episodes back, we started a playlist of f****d up songs. What constitutes a f****d up song, you ask? Any number of things! The content of the song! An event that happened during the filming of the video! A story involving the artist! Really, the song just needs to be listenable and have some sort of story we can say "dude, that's f****d up" about. We're still taking submissions - keep an eye out for the playlist link across the sosh meeds (@dtfupodcast everywhere)!

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