Dr Justin Coulson's Happy Families

Latest Episodes:

#889 Talking to Your Kids About a Suicide Nov 15, 2023

Show notes

*Content warning: mature themes - listener discretion advised*

How do you talk to your kids when they are touched by the profound loss of a loved one through a suicide? These hard conversations must be had openly with your children - with kindness, compassion, and empathy. Your job is NOT to tell them everything, but to answer their questions honestly, in an age-appropriate way.

Topics in this episode:

Protecting children from pain
Limited evidence for how to have these conversations
Keep your reactions level
National Centre for Childhood Grief
Keep the conversation age/developmentally appropriate
Young Children and Middle Childhood:
- Keep it simple
- Operate on the principle of 'the fire hose'
- Answer questions honestly (to the degree with which they are curious) - the more general you can be, the more protected your child will be
- Offer empathy
- Talking helps to dispel misinformation and stigma and creates a safe space to ask questions
- Encourage questions about anything, and at any time
- Ensure they understand what "dead" means. Give concrete answers, not idioms or euphemisms
Expect and accept a range of emotions (and behaviours!) from your child, which will change daily. Let them feel safe to let it all out

Picture Books for Helping Children Navigate Grief

Elergy for an Elephant by Ryan Abramowitz
Death Is Stupid by Anastasia Higginbotham
Luna's Red Hat by Emmi Smid
Red Chocolate Elephants by Diana C. Sands
Forever Connected by Jessica Correnti

For help:

Lifeline: 13 11 14
Suicide Callback Service: 1300 659 467
Mensline Australia: 1300 789 987
Kids Helpline: 1800 55 1800
Standby - Support After Suicide 1300 727 247

In Memory of Logan - Happy Families

Find us on Facebook at Dr Justin Coulson's Happy Families

Email us your questions and comments at podcasts@happyfamilies.com.au

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#888 Finding the Words with Colin Campbell Nov 14, 2023

Show notes

*Content warning: mature themes - listener discretion advised*

When someone is grieving the death of a loved one, it can be difficult to know how to approach them and what to say. How do you convey your compassion, your awareness of their enormous loss? What words and actions are helpful to the person grieving, and what is unhelpful or perhaps even harmful?

Colin Campbell, author of 'Finding the words', shares a practical and helpful approach to supporting someone in their grief, how to move through sorrow and profound loss with hope and purpose, and why there is a vital need for community during the grieving process.

Topics in this episode:

The loss of a child
Suicide
How to support someone in their deep sorrow - what to say, what not to say
"I have no words" ends any chance of a dialogue about grief. Find the words.
The evolution of grief, and of the grieving person's identity within that sorrow
The importance of engaging with and accepting grief, rather than avoiding it
Grief as a sensitive, taboo subject further isolates those in mourning
Why trying to comfort a grieving person is not helpful
Different societal/religious responses to grief, traditional mourning processes, and cultural tools and rules for managing grief in community. Of particular note:
- Jewish mourning traditions: Mourning Kaddish, Shiva ,and Ending Shiva
- Māori mourning ceremony - Tangihanga
What Losing My Two Children Taught Me About Grief - The Atlantic
Viktor Frankl 'Mans Search for Meaning'
Adoption (and the trauma and grief that can accompany it)
In Memory of Logan

For help:

Lifeline: 13 11 14
Suicide Callback Service: 1300 659 467
Mensline Australia: 1300 789 987
Kids Helpline: 1800 55 1800
Standby - Support After Suicide 1300 727 247

Find us on Facebook at Dr Justin Coulson's Happy Families

Email us your questions and comments at podcasts@happyfamilies.com.au

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

An Update From the Happy Families Team Nov 08, 2023

Show notes

As many of you would be aware, Justin's nephew Logan died at the age of 20 after taking his own life.

Craig Bruce is the executive producer of the Happy Families Podcast, and provides a quick update on Justin and Kylie and what the podcast will look like over the next few days.

Justin and Kylie will be taking a break to spend time with family, before we return on Wednesday, November 15th with a timely conversation with Colin Campbell.

After the death of his two teenage children in a car accident, Colin wrote the book 'Finding the Words', a powerful account of how he navigated through unimaginable grief.

From everyone at Happy Families, thank you so much for all of your comments, thoughts and messages at this difficult time,

If you or anyone you know needs help, reach out to the following services:

Lifeline on 13 11 14, Suicide Callback Service on 1300 659 467, Mensline Australia on 1300 789 987or Kids Helpline on 1800 55 1800.

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

#887 Online Capping: What You Need to Know Nov 07, 2023

Show notes

*Content warning - parental discretion advised*

Detective Superintendent Jayne Crossling from ACCCE outlines the critical role parents and carers play in keeping children safe online. Learn how to have important conversations with your children - education is the key to prevention!

Topics in this episode:

What is capping?
The work of ACCCE
Teenagers at risk
How in-game chat functions move to encrypted environments or video chat
Red flags that are often missed
The role of parents and carers in keeping children safe online
Supervision and rules for screens
Teaching children how to respond
Laws regarding child self-generated material
Advice for parents

Some previous interviews with Detective Superintendent Jayne Crossling from ACCCE:

Find us on Facebook at Dr Justin Coulson's Happy Families

Email us your questions and comments at podcasts@happyfamilies.com.au

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

#886 Get Set for Schoolies With Paul Dillon Nov 06, 2023

Show notes

In this episode Justin speaks to Paul Dillon from Drug and Alcohol Research Training Australia about getting ready for the schoolies season.

Find out more about Paul Dillon at the Drug and Alcohol Research Training Australia website.

Topics discussed in this episode:

The cons of letting your kids celebrate schoolies abroad
How safe are organised schoolies events?
Why schoolies is the last opportunity for parents to talk safety with their kids before they are legally adults

Find us on Facebook at Dr Justin Coulson's Happy Families

Email us your questions and comments at podcasts@happyfamilies.com.au

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

#885 Christmas Conundrums: Dodgy and/or Disappointing Gifts Nov 05, 2023

Show notes

With the silly season just around the corner we share some simple tips to help navigate (or avoid entirely!) a meaty "Christmas Conundrum" - when disappointed children and disgruntled gift-givers collide.

Topics in this episode:

Justin's history of dodgy gift giving
Being disappointed AND grateful
The thought is important
Having conversations before Christmas events
How to do difficult conversations with extended family
Forewarned is forearmed

If you have a Christmas Conundrum you would like Justin and Kylie to solve, you can email your question to podcasts@happyfamilies.com.au

Find us on Facebook at Dr Justin Coulson's Happy Families

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

#884 Stolen Scooters & Lessons Learnt Nov 02, 2023

Show notes

Worms, scooters and buckets, oh my! Today we share some personal stories of "nailing it and failing it" to help you be more intentional with your family.

Topics in this episode:

Connection before direction
Flexible intention
Homeschooling
Worm farming
Justin has a no good, very bad, terrible day and gets HANGRY
Filling relationship buckets
"People matter, things don't"

Find us on Facebook at Dr Justin Coulson's Happy Families

Email us your questions and comments at podcasts@happyfamilies.com.au

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

#883 Santa Tightens His Belt Nov 01, 2023

Show notes

With only 54 days left until Christmas are you beginning to feel a little anxious about expenses?

You can have honest conversations with your children about budgets and presents - and still keep the Magic of Christmas alive!

Topics in this episode:

The joys and stress of shopping for gifts
Materialism
Giving and receiving
Anxiety over money
Expectations and values
Wants or needs?
Santa
Three E's of Effective Discipline
Giving in fantasy what they can't have in reality
Easing parental guilt at Christmas

Some Happy Families Christmas Articles:

Find us on Facebook at Dr Justin Coulson's Happy Families

Email us your questions and comments at podcasts@happyfamilies.com.au

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

#882 Parenting Teens When Life Sucks Oct 31, 2023

Show notes

Raising teenagers can be hard even at the best of times. Trying to support our teens when they are struggling can feel like a dead-end street.

Dr Jo Prendergast shares the most important thing you can do that will make a difference for your teen when life just sucks.

Topics in this episode:

When Life Sucks - Jo's new book
Parents and self-regulation
Emotions are contagious
Deep breathing
Being self-aware of your own triggers
'Ghosts in the nursery'
Neurodiversity
When does life suck for teens?
'The Three Rs of Great Parenting'
Connected interactions

Learn more about The Teenage Brain in our FREE Happy Families Article.

Find us on Facebook at Dr Justin Coulson's Happy Families

Email us your questions and comments at podcasts@happyfamilies.com.au

See omnystudio.com/listener for privacy information.

#881 A Lifelong Love of Learning Oct 30, 2023

Show notes

Worried that your low-achieving, school-hating, stressed and struggling child is ruining every chance of their future success?

Learn how to kindle the flame of curiosity in your child - and hear Justin share a poet's definition of success that will encourage and inspire any worried parent.

Topics in this episode: